"Douglas Adams - 2 - The Restaurant at the End of the Universe" - читать интересную книгу автора (Adams Douglas)

stumbled, recovered, raced down the corridor sending a couple of miniature
service robots flying, skidded round the corner, burst into Zaphod's door and
explained what was on his mind.
"Vogons," he said.
A short while before this, Arthur Dent had set out from his cabin in
search of a cup of tea. It was not a quest he embarked upon with a great deal
of optimism., because he knew that the only source of hot drinks on the entire
ship was a benighted piece of equipment produced by the Sirius Cybernetics
Corporation. It was called a Nutri-Matic Drinks Synthesizer, and he had
encountered it before.
It claimed to produce the widest possible range of drinks personally
matched to the tastes and metabolism of whoever cared to use it. When put to
the test, however, it invariably produced a plastic cup filled with a liquid
that was almost, but nit quite, entirely unlike tea.
He attempted to reason with the thing.
"Tea," he said.
"Share and Enjoy," the machine replied and provided him with yet another
cup of the sickly liquid.
He threw it away.
"Share and enjoy," the machine repeated and provided him with another one.
"Share and Enjoy" is the company motto of the hugely successful Sirius
Cybernetics Corporation Complaints division, which now covers the major land
masses of three medium sized planets and is the only part of the Corporation
to have shown a consistent profit in recent years.
The motto stands - or rather stood - in three mile high illuminated
letters near the Complaints Department spaceport on Eadrax. Unfortunately its
weight was such that shortly after it was erected, the ground beneath the
letters caved in and they dropped for nearly half their length through the
offices of many talented young complaints executives - now deceased.
The protruding upper halves of the letters now appear, in the local
language, to read "Go stick your head in a pig", and are no longer
illuminated, except at times of special celebration.
Arthur threw away a sixth cup of the liquid.
"Listen, you machine," he said, "you claim you can synthesize any drink in
existence, so why do you keep giving me the same undrinkable stuff?"
"Nutrition and pleasurable sense data," burbled the machine. "Share and
Enjoy."
"It tastes filthy!"
"If you have enjoyed the experience of this drink," continued the machine,
"why not share it with your friends?"
"Because," said Arthur tartly, "I want to keep them. Will you try to
comprehend what I'm telling you? That drink ..."
"That drink," said the machine sweetly, "was individually tailored to meet
your personal requirements for nutrition and pleasure."
"Ah," said Arthur, "so I'm a masochist on diet am I?"
"Share and Enjoy."
"Oh shut up."
"Will that be all?"
Arthur decided to give up.
"Yes," he said.