"Asimov Isaac - Gold, The Final Science Fiction Collection" - читать интересную книгу автора (Asimov Isaac)

ДBensonhoist? WhereТs that.У
ДI donТt know. Somewhere in the outskirts of the nation I imagine. She speaks an odd variety of what was once English.У He simpered. ДShe calls me Сboychik.УС
ДWhy?У
ДBecause that means Сyoung manТ in Bensonhoist. IТm learning the language rapidly. For instance, suppose you want to say, СGreetings, sir, I am pleased to see you again.Т How would you say it?У
ДJust the way you did.У
ДIn Bensonhoist, you say, СHi, kiddo.Т Brief, and to the point, you see. But come, I want you to meet her. Have dinner with us tomorrow night at Locke-OberТs.У
I was curious to see this Cherry and it is, of course, against my religion to turn down a dinner at Locke-OberТs, so I was there the following night, and early rather than late.
Winthrop walked in soon afterward and with him was a young woman whom I had no difficulty in recognizing as Cherry Lang Gahn of the Bensonhoist Langs, for she was indeed magnificently convex. She also had a narrow waist, and generous hips that swayed as she walked and even as she stood. If her pelvis had been full of cream, it would have been butter long since.
She had frizzy hair of a startling yellow color, and lips of a startling red color which kept up a continual writhing over a wad of chewing gum she had in her mouth.
ДGeorge,У said Winthrop, ДI want you to meet my fiancee, Cherry. Cherry, this is George.У
ДPleeztameechah,У said Cherry. I did not understand the language, but from thetone of her high-pitched, rather nasal voice, I guessed that she was in a state of ecstasy over the opportunity to make my acquaintance.
Cherry occupied my full attention for several minutes for there were several points of interest about her that repaid close observation, but eventually I did manage to notice that Winthrop was in a peculiar state of undress. His vest was open and he was wearing no tie. A closer look revealed that there were no buttons on his vest, and that he was wearing a tie, but it was down his back.
I said, ДWinthrop--У and had to point. I couldnТt put it into words.
Winthrop said, ДThey caught me at it at the Brahman Bank.У
ДCaught you at what.У
ДI hadnТt troubled to shave this morning. I thought since I was going out to dinner, I would shave after I got back at work. Why shave twice in one day? IsnТt that reasonable, George?У He sounded aggrieved.
ДMost reasonable,У I said.
ДWell, they noticed I hadnТt shaved and after a quick trial in the office of the president--a kangaroo court, if you want to know--I suffered the punishment you see. I was also relieved of my post and was thrown out onto the hard concrete of Tremont Avenue. I bounced twice,У he added, with a faint touch of pride.
ДBut this means youТre out of a job!У I was appalled. I have been out of a job all my life, and I am well aware of the occasional difficulties that entails.
ДThat is true,У said Winthrop. ДI now have nothing left in life but my vast stock portfolio, my elaborate bond holdings and the enormous real-estate tract on which the Prudential Center is built--and Cherry.У
ДNatchally,У said Cherry with a giggle. ДI wooden leave my man in advoisity, with all that dough to worry about. We gonna get hitched, ainit, Winthrop.У
ДHitched?У I said.
Winthrop said, ДI believe she is suggesting a blissful wedded state.У
Cherry left for a while after that to visit the ladiesТ room and I said, ДWinthrop, sheТs a wonderful woman, laden down with obvious assets, but if you marry her, you will be cut off by all of New England Society. Even the people in New Haven wonТt speak to you.У
ДLet them not.У He looked to right and left, leaned toward me and whispered, ДCherry is teaching me sex.У
I said, ДI thought you knew about that, Winthrop.У
ДSo did I. But there are apparently post-graduate courses in the subject of an intensity and variety I never dreamed.У
ДHow did she find out about it herself?У
ДI asked her exactly that, for I will not hide from you that the thought did occur to me that she may have had experiences with other men, though that seems most unlikely for one of her obvious refinement and innocence.У
ДAnd what did she say?У
ДShe said that in Bensonhoist the women are born knowing all about sex.У
ДHow convenient!У
ДYes. This is not true in Boston. I was twenty-four before I--but never mind.У
All in all, it was an instructive evening, and, thereafter, I need not tell you, Winthrop went rapidly downhill. Apparently, one need only snap the ganglion that controls formality and there are no limits to the lengths to which informality can go.
He was, of course, cut by everyone in New England of any consequence whatsoever, exactly as I had predicted. Even in New Haven at the Institute of Lower Learning, which Winthrop had mentioned with such shudderings of distaste, his case was known and his disgrace was gloried in. There was graffiti allover the walls of Jale, or Yule, or whatever its name is, that said, with cheerful obscenity, ДWinthrop Carver Cabwell is a Harvard man.У
This was, as you can well imagine, fiendishly resented by all the good people of Harvard and there was even talk of an invasion of Yale. The states of both Massachusetts and Connecticut made ready to call up the State Militia but, fortunately, the crisis passed. The fire-eaters, both at Harvard and at the other place, decided that a war would get their clothes mussed up.
Winthrop had to escape. He married Cherry and they retired to a small house in some place called Fah Rockaway, which apparently serves as BensonhoistТs Riviera. There he lives in obscurity, surrounded by the mountainous remnants of his wealth and by Cherry whose hair has turned brown with age, and whose figure has expanded with weight.
He is also surrounded by five children, for Cherry--in teaching Winthrop about sex--was overenthusiastic. The children, as I recall, are named Poil, Hoibut, Boinard, Goitrude, and Poicy, all good Bensonhoist names. As for Winthrop, he is widely and affectionately known as the Slob of Fah Rockaway, and an old, beat-up bathrobe is his preferred article of wear on formal occasions.

I listened to the story patiently and, when George was done, I said, ДAnd there you are. Another story of disaster caused by your interference.У
ДDisaster?У said George, indignantly. ДWhat gives you the idea it was a disaster? I visited Winthrop only last week and he sat there burping over this beer and patting the paunch he has developed, and telling me how happy he was.У
ДСFreedom, George,Т he said. СI have freedom to be myself and somehow I feel I owe it to you. I donТt know why I have this feeling, but I do.Т And he forced a ten-dollar bill on me out of sheer gratitude. I took it only to avoid hurting his feelings. And that reminds me, old fellow, that you owe me ten dollars because you bet me I couldnТt tell you a story that didnТt end in disaster.У
I said, ДI donТt remember any such bet, George.У
GeorgeТs eyes rolled upward. ДHow convenient is the flexible memory of a deadbeat. If you had won the bet, you would have remembered it clearly. Am I going to have to ask that you place all your little wagers with me in writing so that I can be free of your clumsy attempts to avoid payment?У
I said, ДOh, well,У and handed him a ten-dollar bill, adding, ДYou wonТt hurt my feelings, George, if you refuse to accept this.У
ДItТs kind of you to say so,У said George, Дbut IТm sure that your feelings would be hurt, anyway, and I couldnТt bear that.У And he put the bill away.
the end


I showed this story to Mr. Northrop, too, watching him narrowly as he read it.