"Steve Barlow - StarBores" - читать интересную книгу автора (Barlow Steve)

Star Bores
The Novel



By Steve Barlow & Steve Skidmore
(Microsoft Word version by The ScanMan)



A story of unbelievable heroism,
unspeakable villainy,
and unlimited merchandising opportunities . . .



Digitally remastered in PAGEOVISIONTM
with SURROUNDWORDSTM




May the Farce be with you!


Copyright 1999, Element ChildrenТs Books
Star Bores is a parody. It is not authorized, endorsed, or licensed by LucasFilm Ltd. or anyone else connected with the Empire.




Long, long ago in a galaxy far, far, far, far, away . . .


Well, when we say long ago, we mean a fairly long time ago, not all THAT long ago Ц for instance, not right at the beginning of the Universe because everything was very hot then, and the highest form of life was a sort of worm that wasnТt much more intelligent than the average daytime TV host Ц but much longer ago than when you could wear polyester pants without being laughed at, or your last birthday. And when we say far away, we donТt mean all the way at the other end of the Universe Ц obviously, we wouldnТt know anything about it because of worm holes Ц but a lot farther than, say, the next rest stop on the freeway . . .
Episode IV Ц A New Hype . . .

Wait a minute Ц what do you mean, Episode IV?

What do you mean, what do I mean?

I mean what happened to Episodes I, II and III?

Ah, well, you see, there are IX Episodes altogether . . .