"DjunaBarnes-LadiesAlmanack" - читать интересную книгу автора (Barnes Djuna)

of her most gentle Mother to be a Boy, when therefore, she came forth an Inch or
so less than this, she paid no Heed to the Error, but donning a Vest of a superb
Blister and Tooling, a Belcher for tippet and a pair of hip-boots with a scarlet
channel (for it was a most wet wading) she took her Whip in hand, calling her
Pups about her, and so set out upon the Road of Destiny, until such time as they
should grow to be Hounds of Blood, and Pointers with a certainty in the Butt of
their Tails; waiting patiently beneath Cypresses for this Purpose, and under the
Boughs of the aloe tree, composing, as she did so, Madrigals to all sweet and
ramping things.
Her Father, be it known, spent many a windy Eve pacing his Library in the most
normal of Night-Shirts, trying to think of ways to bring his erring Child back
into that Religion and Activity which has ever been thought sufficient for a
Woman; for already, when Evangeline appeared at Tea to the Duchess Clitoressa of
Natescourt, women in the way (the Bourgeoise be it noted, on an errand to some
nice Church of the Catholic Order, with their Babes at Breast, and Husbands at
Arm) would snatch their Skirts from Contamination, putting such wincing Terror
into their Dears with their quick and trembling Plucking, that it had been
observed, in due time, by all Society, and Evangeline was in order of becoming
one of those who is spoken to out of Generosity, which her Father could see,
would by no Road, lead her to the Altar.
He had Words with her enough, saying: "Daughter, daughter, I perceive in you
most fatherly Sentiments. What am I to do?" And she answered him High enough,
"Thou, good Governor, wast expecting a Son when you lay atop of your Choosing,
why then be so mortal wounded when you perceive that you have your Wish? Am I
not doing after your very Desire, and is it not the more commendable, seeing
that I do it without the Tools for the Trade, and yet nothing complain?"
In the days of which I write she had come to be a witty and learned Fifty, and
though most short of Stature and nothing handsome, was so much in Demand, and so
wide famed for her Genius at bringing up by Hand, and so noted and esteemed for
her Slips of the Tongue that it finally brought her into the Hall of Fame, where
she stood by a Statue of Venus as calm as you please, or leaned upon a lacrymal
Urn with a small Sponge for such as Wept in her own Time and stood in Need of
it.
*
Thus begins this Almanack, which all Ladies
should carry about with them, as the Priest his
Breviary, as the Cook his Recipes,
as the Doctor his Physic, as
he Bride her Fears,
and as the Lion
his Roar!
*
JANUARY
hath 31 days
THIS be the first Month of our Christian calendar, when the Earth is bound and
the Seas in the grip of Terror. When the Birds give no Evidence of themselves,
and are in the Memory alone recorded, when the Sap lies sleeping and the Tree
knows nothing of it, when the bright Herbage and flourishing green things are
only hope, when the Plough is put away with the Harrow, and the Fields give
their Surface to a Harvest of Snow, which no Sickle garners, and for which no