"Brookmyre, Christopher - Boiling A Frog" - читать интересную книгу автора (Brookmyre Christopher)'Sorry, I don't smoke.'
'Fuck's sake. Aye right. Naw, ne'er ye dae. Fuckinun. Altiyeman, it's amazin'. Nae cunt smokes in this place, no when ye fuckin' tap them anyway. Fuckinn. Come oan, ya cunt. Just gie's a fag. Just wan. Fuck's sake.' Parlabane felt an amplified throb in his head as Fooaltiye raised his voice. Despite the distraction of pain, his detective skills had successfully decoded the human skelf's eponymous, punctuatory ejaculation. He had achieved this through the cryptographic technique of comparing its constituent variants: Fooaltiyeman, Fooaltiye, Altiyeman and just plain Altiye. Translated from the primitive and obscure 'Prick' dialect, it meant 'Phew, I'll tell you, man . . .' and heralded an observation of deepest wisdom. 'I don't smoke,' Parlabane repeated, slowly, quietly, every word's resonation giving his napper another twinge. Awww, fuck's sake, man. Fuckinnn, come on, man. If I had some I'd gie you wan, 'mon tae fuck. Just fuckin' cough, man, just wan, 'mon.' Parlabane cradled his head again as the throbbing threatened to resume its previous intensity. 'I don't smoke. I never have.' 'Right.' There was a flurry of dark and light greys as the bottom bunk's blanket billowed angrily and Fooaltiye emerged in front of Parlabane, scrawny, pale and sweatily greasy: Smeagol with a habit. 'Fuckin' stop an' search time, ya cunt. An' altiye, if I fuckin' fin' any fags, you're gettin' a fuckin' skelp, man. Alfuckintiye.' Fooaltiye was in his face, his emaciated and pock-marked limbs seeming to enclose Parlabane. Hands patted him down, a bony knee pressed into his ribs, and from his dental write-off of a mouth there wafted vapours internationally outlawed since the First World War. Parlabane just sat there, motionless, unresisting, head- bowed, feeling the utter humiliation of his vulnerability. This was what he had brought himself to: being menaced by some junky scrote practically half his age, and being too fucking scared to do anything about it but close his eyes and wait for it to be over. what the hell could he do? On the outside he'd once been a man of boundless (and, when necessary, lawless) resources, all of which could be put to use in compensating for the fact 'Prick' dialect, it meant 'Phew, I'll tell you, man . . .' and heralded an observation of deepest wisdom. |
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