"Campbell, Ramsey - The Parasite 1.0" - читать интересную книгу автора (Campbell Ramsey)

'You know I do. It's just so difficult to put it into words.' She felt nervous and clumsy; this would be harder than telling Colin. Gulls passed overhead, an explosion of white, whose shadows touched her too quickly even to hint of coolness. `I'll try,' she said at last. `But don't interrupt until I've finished. Please.'

`All right.' He seemed slightly offended that she felt the need to ask.

Smooth brick-red paths sloped to the promenade.

Boys on skateboards rushed towards the Mersey. Children were everywhere, catching frisbees, throwing a chewed ball for a terrier to chase; there was even a hopeful group running about the plateau with a grounded kite. A little girl whose legs were patched like old clothes with Elastoplast stood on her head against the promenade railings. Adults sat on benches or in brick shelters with portholes, or wheeled prams beside the river.

`I've been peculiar,' Rose said with an effort, `since the night I stayed with Diana.' Was there a glint of wry agreement in his eyes? `The night after I was attacked,' she said, `I felt as though I was going to float out of my body. That could just have been dizziness, an aftereffect, I know. As a matter of fact, I dreamed that it actually happened. Well, when we came home I felt that it was going to happen again. This was weeks later, during the s8ance.'

`Oh, that stupidity. I wish I hadn't joined in.'

`Oh, Bill, you did promise not to interrupt. Don't make it more difficult for me.' The river lapped quietly, gently rocking its burden of light, offering a sense of calm - but it reminded her of her plunge into the muddy depths, and she stayed well back from the edge. `Then -' she said, and her words seemed to clutter her mouth, to be impossible to dislodge. `Then one night it really happened. The night you couldn't wake me.'

`What really happened?'

'I seemed to leave my body - to go outside the house. I couldn't stop myself.'

`You dreamed you left your body,' he said mildly, as though correcting a freshman.

`I knew you'd say that. I'm not getting at you - I felt the same way when Diana tried to persuade me it was real the first time. But this last time was real. I'm sure of it now. I saw that television set by the road. I'd never seen that before.'

`I told you, that's been there for months.'

`Yes, but 1 hadn't seen it.'

`You must have.' His voice was firm and reasonable, and seemed intolerably patronizing. `What other explanation can there be? Really, Ro, it isn't like you to want to believe that sort of thing. Was that why you couldn't sleep?'

'Yes, I was afraid it might happen again.'

`But then what on earth is the point of reading that book? "Some voyagers report that their astral bodies can be stretched like chewing gum",' he quoted, and looked dismayed when she didn't laugh. `Why invite another of these nightmares? Seriously, Ro, you must know that's all they are.'

`I've told you that I thought so until very recently.' She felt alone, isolated by her plight. Lampposts held up brackets for lifebelts along the promenade; many brackets were empty, their belts stolen or flung away. `Just suppose these things were real,' she said. `Would you help me? Would you look after me?'

'Of course I would. I'll always look after you. But they aren't real, they can't be. Look here,' he said, invoking rationality, `what did Colin say?'

'He wasn't sure. He thought they might be real. He felt I shouldn't repress them if they were.'

'Colin said that? Colin did?' For a moment she thought that his dogmatism was shaken. `The stupid twat,' he said. Strolling couples began to glance at him. `Why did he want to tell you that kind of shit? How is that supposed to help you? The stupid bloody turd! Jesus Christ Almighty!' If Colin had been present, Bill would certainly have knocked him down. `And whose idea was it,' he said dangerously, `that you should read that book?'

`My own.'

Her quietness calmed him. He looked embarrassed, anxious to leave behind the strollers who had overheard him. He hurried down the promenade. Beyond the far end, cranes bunched like skeletons of plants at Garston docks. A wind had begun to sweep the river, and ruffled his hair. As she caught up with him and took his hand, an airliner from Speke Airport rose leisurely over the cranes.

`Don't read any more of it, Ro. It can't be doing you any good.'

`I'm not sure. It doesn't disturb me to read about the subject now. Don't you see that's reassuring? I want to be sure that I haven't been harmed.' Beside the promenade, gorse blazed amid sullen green; she could almost feel the prickles. The intensified sense was more awesome than disturbing. `There's one thing that appeals to me,' she said. `To feel that you may be able to survive outside your body.'

`Appeals?' he repeated sadly.