"Chalker, Jack L - DG1 - The River of the Dancing Gods" - читать интересную книгу автора (Chalker Jack L)him, after a while, that I was smarter and better educated than
he was. He had some inferiority complex. He was hell on his recruits, too -- but they got away from him after eight weeks or so. I had him for years. After a while he got transferred up to Reese in Lubbock, but he hated that job and he hated the cold weather and the dust and wind, and that just made it all the worse. Me, I had it really bad there, too, since what few friends I had were all in San Antonio." "I'd have taken a hike long before," he commented. "Di- vorce ain't all that bad. Ask my ex." "Well, it's easy to see that -- now. But I had some money for the first time, and a house, and a real sense of something permanent, even if it was lousy. I know it's kind of hard to understand -- it's hard to explain. I guess you just had to be me. I figured maybe kids would mellow him out and give me a new direction -- but after two miscarriages, the second one damn near killing me, the doctors told me I should never have kids. Probably couldn't, but definitely shouldn't. That just made him meaner and sent me down the tubes. Booze, pot, pills -- you name it, I swallowed it or smoked it or sniffed it. And one day -- it was my thirtieth birthday -- I looked at myself in the mirror, saw somebody a shot-to-hell forty-five looking back at me, picked up what I could use most and carry easy, cashed things out. I've been walking ever since -- and I still haven't 10 THE RIVER OF DANCING GODS JACK L. CHALKER 11 been out of the goddamned state of Texas. I waited tables, swept floors, never stayed long in one spot. Hell, I've sold my body for a plate of eggs. Done everything possible to keep from thinking, looking ahead, worrying. I burned out. I've had it." He thought about it for a moment, and then it came to him. "But you jumped out of that fella's car." She nodded wearily. "Yeah, I did. I don't even know why, exactly. Or maybe, yes, I do, too. It was an all-of-a-sudden |
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