"L. Sprague De Camp - The Unbeheaded King" - читать интересную книгу автора (De Camp L Sprague)

Jonan shrugged "I try to make the best of things, be
they magical or mechanical. At least we can thank King
Ishbahar's monstrous fatness that we have so huge a tub,
wherein the twain of us can comfortably sleep Didst ever
hear how he came to have it made7"

"Nay, my son Tell me, pray "

"When Ishbahar acceded to the throne, he was already
vastly obese, eating having been his favorite pastime from
boyhood on Well, the night following his coronation, he
was, naturally, weary after a day of standing about and
making ceremonial motions and uttenng prescnbed re-
sponses to the high priests of the leading cults. So he
commanded his lackeys to prepare a bath for him, and told
his favorite wife to await him in the royal bed

"The royal bathtub, however, had been made for his
predecessor, Shashtai the Eighth, who was a small, spare
man Ishbahar tested the water with his finger and found
it )ust right With a sigh of happy anticipation, he mounted
the step that the lackeys had placed beside the tub and
lowered himself into the water But alas' As he sank down,
he found himself firmly wedged between the sides of the
tub He called out to a servant 'Ho, this won't do' We are

THE UNBEHEADED KING

squeezed to a }elly! Help us out, pray'' So the servitor
caught the king's arm and heaved, but without effect. Be-
tween the king's vast weight and the wedging effect of the
sloping sides of the tub, Ishbahar was stuck fast.

"They called more servants, and all together heaved on
the king's armsтАФto no avail. A guardsman was called, to
thrust the butt of his halberd over the edge of the tub and
under the royal arse, to pry him up. Ishbahar bore the pam
bravely except for a few groans, but still he remained stuck.
Then two flunkeys added their weight to that of the
guardsman on the head end of the halberd, but they only
succeeded in breaking the spear shaft.

"Then the king had the chief engineer of the School of
Matter in the House of Learning dragged out of bed. The
engineer looked over the problem and told the king: 'Your
Maiesty, I can get you out. All we need do is bore a hole
in the ceiling and install a hoist with compound pulleys-
By looping ropes under your armpits and thighs, we shall
have you out in a jiffy.'