"Carol Emshwiller - Childhood of the Human Hero (2)" - читать интересную книгу автора (Emshwiller Carol)

Learn it, Dummy. 8 X 7, 8 X 8. "You're making me hate arithmetic," he says. Odd numbers, even
numbers, two by two down school's light-green halls and he's been at it seven years. Even when
there's a death, you know, we all go on more or less as though nothing had happened. Go back to
those same old circumferences of circles, parallel lines down the middle of, and follow
instructions. I'm telling you, you can do as you wish, see the dead laid out on display the old-
fashioned way with a $50 blanket of roses just as Grandma wanted it, or not. It's up to you. But
don't come to me after five o'clock because there's no changing your mind. There's a death
deadline, but it's not what you think-falling down and losing your memory, getting up and falling
down again, the

suden zap, zap, zap of ray guns. You've lost some of your best men, but you're miraculously safe.
Captain, you're always so miraculously safe except in the dark.

"Slide inner front sprocket wheel (# 17) over sprocket shaft, then place wheel retainer (# 13)
over end of shaft. Apply a drop of cement to end of shaft adhering retainer to shaft. Then cement
outer front sprocket wheel (# 18) to inner sprocket wheel by applying cement at notch on outer
wheel."

"Look, Ma. Look, Ma."

(Don't bother me now.)

"Look, Ma, drop these seemingly innocent pellets into a glass of water and magically a worm will
appear."

By 2001 I'll be dead.

No more "Look, Ma."

Inferno, mad inventor of instruments of torture and destruction, all your tricks are useless. They
can't make him tell where his mother is hidden.

For those who dare! Surprise Package. Only fifty cents. Are you willing to take a chance on a
secret? Listen then, the mother has both breasts and penis sometimes. She - has to. There's no


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other solution to some of those knotty little problems of sexual identification; face them every
day and see who wears the blue jeans. (Everybody does.) We won't tell you what you get, but
because you're willing to gamble we'll give you much more than your money's worth. Satisfaction
guaranteed. Are you willing to face the real green slime? Well, let's get this straightened out
once and for all. Maybe the penis is just a realistic skincolored spooky hand with red fingernails
and big knuckles (ninety-eight cents). Imagine it poking out of your car door at sixty miles an
hour, or out of a suitcase on the train. Imagine it on the piano keys, on the window ledge,
peeking out of a grocery bag, opening a door. Comes with special adhesive. Sticks anywhere. Can be
reused over and over and over and over.
What's green and squashed and lies in the gutter? That's a girl scout run over by. a
truck.