"01 - A Difficulty With Dwarves" - читать интересную книгу автора (Gardner Craig Shaw)

- THE TEACHINGS OF EBENEZUM, Volume XLI

'To the circle!' my master cried as he ran from the library. The other wizards, alerted by Ebenezum's warning, hastily moved to their preassigned positions.

The circle of wizards raised their arms as one. Then in unison each magician began to sneeze.

The quake intensified. The ground heaved, shaking me from my feet. By the time I regained my balance, I saw that a great rift had appeared in the earth at the center of the courtyard. I watched, horrified, as a demonic apparition rose from the bowels of the Netherhells to fill that rift.

The quake ceased as suddenly as it had begun. I gripped my stout oak staff as the dust settled, and I could clearly see what the foul fiends of the Netherhells had brought into our midst.

It appeared to be a stout oak table, behind which sat five of the largest and ugliest demons I had ever seen. The one in the center pounded on the table with a huge gavel.

'I now bring this attack to order!' the thing announced in a voice far too coarse to be called gravelly.

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What sinister trick of the Netherhells was this? I turned to my master, but he was lost, sneezing deep within his robes. It was up to the warriors, then. I nodded to my fellows still standing amidst the sneezing mages.

'Doom,' Hendrek agreed.

We all took a cautious step forward.

'Wait a moment!' the slightly smaller, purplish demon cried from the end of the table. 'Who gives you the authority to begin the attack? We have to have a consensus here!'

'My dear Blecch,' the demon with the gavel calmly replied. 'I beg to differ. We don't need a consensus. In cases like this, a simple majority is fine.'

'Majority?' Blecch laughed derisively. 'My fellow demon is completely out of order!' It pounded its demonic fist on a large and ugly tome that it had just opened. 'It states clearly here, in the New Netherhells Bylaws -

The demonic group seemed a bit disorganized. If we were going to win, we should attack now.

I lifted my stout oak staff above my head, and with the mightiest cry I could muster, ran towards the demons. Luckily, my fellows followed my lead. As I ran to face our enemy, I glimpsed Hubert galloping, Hendrek trundling, and the unicorn prancing magnificently forward to attack.

The Dealer of Death got there before all of us.

'Point of order!' one of the demons cried. 'We seem to be under attack!'

'I vote for retaliatory action!' Blecch added 'All in favor say' - he paused as the Dealer grasped him by the throat - 'Urracht!'

'No, no,' the gavel demon insisted. 'A show of hands is more appropriate. All in favor?'

The four demons not currently being strangled raised

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their hands. Blecch, with some considerable effort, managed to follow suit.

'It's unanimous, then!' the gavel demon announced. 'Time for the boiling blood!'