"01 - A Difficulty With Dwarves" - читать интересную книгу автора (Gardner Craig Shaw)

'Doom,' Hendrek repeated. Snarks began to shiver.

'Hold, friends!' I called to the three of them. I had seen enough. If I was to accomplish my master's wishes, I would have to speak to them quickly and be on my way. 'Does there seem to be some problem?'

'No problem at all!' the Brownie piped up. 'We're talking about Brownie Power!'

'Whether we want to or not,' Snarks added quickly. He tugged nervously at my sleeve. 'You'll talk to him, won't you? My mother didn't raise me to be Brownie fodder.'

'Brownie fodder?' Tap replied. 'Brownie fodder? Sir, I want you to know that, to my knowledge, Brownies have never eaten demons for dinner. Or for lunch or breakfast either. Actually, we prefer to eat tiny cakes, baked to resemble boots, and even smaller sandal-shaped sugar cookies. Of course, when we are really hungry -'

'Doom,' Hendrek interjected. 'I believe the demon was speaking metaphorically.'

'Really?' Tap seemed taken aback. 'You'll have to excuse me. We in the shoe trade were never very good at meta-

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phors. Similes are more our style! You know, like: "As industrious as a Brownie" or "As well made as a Brownie shoe." Now those are comparisons that mean something!'

The Brownie hesitated, doubt creeping into his enthusiasm. 'But metaphorical Brownie fodder? I had no idea you felt that way about the lessons. Perhaps His Brownieship is right. I do have a tendency to be too direct. Go for the gold, you know. That's a saying we wee folk have. I apologize if I have shocked you, friend demon.'

'Shocked?' Snarks replied, obviously startled by Tap's abrupt about-face. 'Someone who grew up in the Netherhells cannot be shocked. Being stunned by an excess of Brownie prattle, however, is another matter.' The demon took a deep breath, warming to his subject. 'And yet, you have apologized. Perhaps there is some hope for you little people after all. I could give you some advice on proper deportment. I'm sure if we worked on it long enough, we might find something for you to do that might even make a Brownie's life worthwhile!'

The Brownie nodded. 'It's obvious where I have gone wrong. I was too direct, too overwhelmed by Brownie Power! I must take a much more subtle approach, working by this deluded demon's side, showing him the truth in little ways every day, even though it may take weeks or months -'

'Months?' Snarks wailed, his rebuilt confidence evaporating at the very suggestion. 'Months?'

Tap nodded again. 'Perhaps even years. We Brownies have time. That's the joy of Brownie Power!'

'Joy?' Snarks' mouth began to work in a manner unnatural even for a demon. 'I'll give you joy!'

I restrained the demon's lunge with my stout oak staff and turned to Tap.

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'Pardon me, but didn't you have a message to deliver?' I inquired.

The Brownie slapped his forehead. 'That's what happens when you start talking about shoes! I mean, the excitement just drives everything else out of your mind.' He hastily patted Snarks' footwear. 'Sorry, friend demon, but I have to go. Oh, what will His Brownieship think of me? I'll be demoted to buckles and laces!'

He waved hastily in my direction. 'I shall be back within the hour!'

'Meet us at the willow by the Great Hall -' I called after him.

A modest explosion, a small cloud of dust, and the Brownie disappeared.

'Gone?' Snarks asked, a slight quaver in his voice. 'Gone?'

'Doom,' Hendrek murmured, an immense, yet comforting hand on the demon's shoulder. 'Calm yourself. I have never seen you so undone before.'

'Yeah,' Snarks retorted. 'And I've never heard you use the word metaphor, either. Better watch out. High-flung language like that will get you kicked out of the Warriors Guild.'