"Jason Gould - The Seven Wonders Of The Modern World" - читать интересную книгу автора (Gould Jason) an unknown Country and Western singer's face with part of his ass, to make
him more like Kenny Rogers, and the day after that he had a would-be Virgin Mary coming in. I was very excited. 'I want to look in the mirror and not be repulsed,' I told him when he asked what I wanted. 'I see,' he said, sitting down at his desk. 'And is there part of your face that repulses you most?' 'No. All of it.' 'And who, exactly, would you like to be?' 'Who?' I said. 'I presume you want to be a star...' 'Maybe. I've not really thought it through. I just don't want to be me.' He reached into a drawer and produced a thick catalogue. He threw it on the desk. He said: 'Beauty is in the eye of the deceiver.' 'Which means?' 'That you can be anyone you want, and if you were famous, or if you become famous, then anyone can be you.' 'Cool!' 'First,' he said, pushing the catalogue towards me, 'the eyes.' It was entitled: EYES, FEMALE. I opened it and a thousand faceless eyes stared at me. Each page contained ten rows of different sized photographs, the entire face, other than the eyes, inked out. Written beside each pair was the name of the owner. It began with corneas pilfered from the stage and screen: Garbo, Hepburn, Madonna et al. As I turned the pages so the owner's popularity diminished, and at the end I was leafing through Marcia Z, 5th Avenue, August 13th 1998, or J.L.D., Venice Beach, June 2nd, 1997. At the very back were animal eyes, cats being the most popular. 'There are so many...' I said. 'You don't have to decide now,' he replied. He tossed me another catalogue: MOUTHS, FEMALE. It was identical to its predecessor except it grinned and pouted where the other had glared, winked or frowned. Madonna was there again, beside Jerry Hall, Elizabeth Taylor, Twiggy. Next was NOSES, FEMALE, and next, CHEEKS; and then HAIR, and NECKS, and CHINS, KNEES, ELBOWS. I was overwhelmed and unable to decide who to be. Narcissus left me alone. I browsed, kneeling on the floor surrounded by open catalogues. Muzak - Vaughan Williams' Lark Ascending if I wasn't mistaken - was piped through the walls. When he returned he had more product literature. He sat on the edge of the desk and handed them to me one after the other. He'd brought navels, hips, ankles, toes. I said: 'I had no idea the range was so extensive.' 'Oh it's more than just faces and thighs,' he said. 'Surgeons are the tailors of the twentieth century.' He paused. Then he said: 'Now, what would you like to do about your vagina?' He passed me another folder. 'We have a discount at the moment on the Nastassja Kinski; it's a lot of work but the end result is superb. For a few thousand more there's the Marilyn Monroe, our most popular brand: not as symmetrical but with significantly more girth.' |
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