"06 - The SSR is Born" - читать интересную книгу автора (Harrison Harry)

soon as Smelly went through the door I nipped down and broke into his locker.
It worked like a charm. I take some pride in this since it was the first criminal scenario that I prepared for others to take part in. All unsuspecting of course. At the appointed

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time I drifted up to the candy counter at Ming's, working very hard to ignore the rentaflics, who were working equally hard pretending they weren't watching me. With relaxed motions I placed the book atop the candies and bent to fix my boot fastener.
"Nicked!" the burlier of them shouted, seizing me by the coat collar. "Gotchal" the other crowed, grabbing up the book.
"What are you doing," I croakedЧ1 had to croak be-

cause my coat was now pulled tight about my throat as I hung suspended from it. "ThiefЧgive me back my sevenbuck history book that my Morn bought with money earned weaving matts from porcuswine quills!"
"Book?" the great bully sneered. "We know all about this book." He seized the ends and pulled. It opened and the look on his face as the pages flipped over was something sweet to behold. "
"I have been framed," I squeaked, opening my coat and dropping free, rubbing at my sore throat. "Framed by the criminal who bragged about using that same technique for his own nefarious ends. He stands there, one Smelly by name. Grab him, guys, before he runs away!" Smelly could only stand and gape while the ready hands of his peers clutched tight. His schoolbooks fell to the floor and the imitation book burst open and disgorged its contents of Get-Stuffeds upon the floor.
It was beautiful. Tears and recriminations and shouting. A perfect distraction as well. Because this was the day that I field-tested my Mark II Get-Stuffed stuffer. I had worked hard on this device which was built around a silent vacuum pumpЧwith a tube down my sleeve. I brought the tube end close to the candy bars andЧzip!Чthe first of them vanished from sight. It ended up in my trousers, or rather inside the hideous plus-fours we were forced to wear as a school uniform. These bagged out and were secured above the ankle by a sturdy elastic band. The candy bar dropped safely into it, to be followed by another and yet another.
Except I couldn't turn the damn thing off. Thank goodness for Smelly's screaming and struggling. All eyes were

8 A STAINLESS STEEL RAT IS BORN

on him and not me as I struggled with the switch. Meanwhile the pump still pumped and theGet-Stuffeds shot up my sleeve and into my trousers. I turned it off eventually but if anyone had bothered to look my way, why the empty counter and my bulging-legged form would have been a might suspicious. But thankfully no one did. I exited with a rolling gait, as quickly as I could. As I said, a memory 1. will always cherish.
Which, of course, does not explain why I have now, on my birthday, made the major decision to hold up a bank. And get caught.
The police had finally broken down the door and were swarming in. I raised my hands over my head and prepared to welcome them with warm smiles.
The birthday, 'that is the final reason. My seventeenth birthday. Becoming seventeen here on Bit 0' Heaven is a very important time in a young man's life.



CHAPTER TWO

The judge leaned forward and looked down at me, not unkindly. ╗
"Now come on, Jimmy,, tell me what this tomfoolery is all about."
Judge Nixon had a summer house on the river, not too far from our farm, and I had been there often enough with his youngest son for the judge to get to know me.
"My name is James diGriz, buster. Let us not get too familiar."
This heightened his color a good deal, as you might imagine. His big nose stuck out like a red ski slope and his nostrils flared. "You will have more respect in this courtroom! You are faced with serious charges, my boy, and it might help your case to keep a civil tongue in your mouth. I am appointing Arnold Fortescue, the public defender, as your attorney. . . ."
"I don't need an attorneyЧand I particularly don't need old Skewey who has been on the sauce so long there isn't a man alive who has seen him sober. . . ."
There was a ripple of laughter from the public seats, which infuriated the judge. "Order in the courti" he bellowed, hammering his gavel so hard that the handle broke. He threw the stub across the room and glared angrily at me. "You are trying the patience of this court. Lawyer Fortescue has been appointed. . . ."
"Not by me he hasn't. Send him back to Mooney's Bar. I plead guilty to all charges and throw myself on the mercy of this merciless court.
He drew in his breath with a shuddering sigh and I

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decided to ease off a bit before he had a stroke and collapsed; then there would be a mistrial and more time would be wasted.
"I'm sorry, judge." I hung my head to hide an unrepressed smile. "But I done wrong and I will have to pay the penalty. "
"Well, that's more like it, Jimmy. You always were a smart lad and I hate to see all that intelligence going to waste. You will go to Juvenile Correction Hall for a term of not less thanЧ"
"Sorry, your honor," I broke in. "Not possible. Oh, tfl only had committed my criraes last week or last month! The law is firm on this and I have no escape. Today is my birthday. My seventeenth birthday.
That slowed him down all right. The guards looked on patiently while he punched for information on his computer terminal. The reporter for the Bit 0' Heaven Bugle working just as hard on the keys of his own portable terminal at the same time. He was filing quite a story. It didn't take the judge long to come up with the answers. He sighed.
"That is true enough. The records reveal that you are seventeen this day and have achieved your majority. You are no longer a juvenile and must be treated as an adult. This would mean a prison term for certainЧif I didn't allow for the circumstances. A first offense,,the obvious youth of the defendant, his realization that he has done wrong. It is within the power of this bench to make exceptions, to suspend a sentence and bind a prisoner over. It is my decision . . ."
The last thing I wanted to do was hear his decision now. Things were not going as I had planned, not at all. Action

was required. I acted. My scream drowned out the judge's words. Still screaming I dived headlong from the prisoner's dock, shoulder-rolled neatly on the floor, and was

across the room before my shocked audience could even consider moving.