"Harry Harrison & Robert Sheckley - Bill the Galactic Hero 3 " - читать интересную книгу автора (Harrison Harry)

the stethoscopes sticking rakishly from their pockets. All of them spoke Standard, Classical, or Tsurisian,
so Bill's translator, which was still implanted under his armpit, was able to handle the language without
difficulty. One of the first questions Bill asked was, "Doc, how am I?"
"You're doing fine, just fine," the doctor said.
"Well, if I'm all right, how about letting me out of here?"
"Oh, there's no rush for that, I'm sure," the doctor said, and left with a little chuckle.
"What did he mean by that little chuckle?" Bill asked Illyria after the doctors had left.
"You know how doctors are," Illyria said. "They find anything funny."
"What's supposed to happen to me when I'm released from here?"
"Must we talk about that?" Illyria said. "It's been such a nice day, why spoil it?"
Illyria got transferred to nights. She and Bill would talk about many things. Bill learned that the
Tsurisians had been living on this planet of Tsuris for much longer than anyone could remember. There
was a theory that, when Tsuris was born out of the fiery explosions of Eeyore, its yellowish-red sun, all of
the intelligences which now lived on the planet as Tsurisians were born with it. Bill didn't understand
what she meant. Illyria had to explain that there were no real births or deaths on Tsuris. All of the
intelligences who had ever lived here were still around, existing unconsciously in a psychovivant solution
of natural electrolytes.


file:///G|/Program%20Files/eMule/Incoming/Har...0-%20The%20Planet%20of%20Bottled%20Brains.htm (14 of 122) [10/16/2004 2:56:55 PM]
 Bill, the Galactic Hero on the Planet of Bottled Brains

"All of them?" Bill asked. "How many are there?"
"Exactly one billion," Illyria told him. "No more and no less. And they тАФ we тАФ have all been here since
the beginning. Some day I must show you where those without bodies are waiting. Or resting as we call
it. They are in bottles тАФ"
"A billion brains in bottles! That's an awful lot of bottles."
"Indeed it is and we had to scour the galaxy for them. We have wine bottles, beer bottles, soft drink
bottles тАФ just about every kind of bottle that you can name."
"Whee," Bill oozed, depressed again. "And why should there be exactly one billion?"
"The ways of the Deity are strange," Illyria said. She was a religious woman тАФ a practicing member of
the Church of Very Little Charities. Despite that she was a pleasant companion, and more broad-minded
than most Tsurisian females. Or so she told Bill.

Bill wondered, naturally enough, what was to become of him. Illyria didn't seem to want to talk about it.
She would grow somber, or indicate whatever passed for somber whenever Bill raised the topic. Her
bluish-yellow eyes would cloud over. Her voice would grow husky.
Bill was having a good time, all things considered. The only work required of him, if you wanted to call it
that, was a two-hour session in the nutrient bath. Never had his skin been so soft. His fingernails were
getting soft, too. Even the claws on his alligator foot, which had grown to respectable size now, were
starting to soften up. Once he asked Illyria why they were giving him so many baths, but she said she'd
rather not talk about it.
Illyria was fascinated by Bill's foot. At first it had frightened her, and she had insisted that he wear a
velvet sock over it. But after a while she became used to the green alligator's foot, and would ask to see it,
and pull his talons gently with her fingerlike appendages, the way mother vultures play with the talons of
baby vultures.
Once Illyria had asked him how he was in math. "Not very good," Bill said. "I needed two terms in
special technical training school and that was no good. I had to get special math injection brain treatments
before I could do simple addition on an electronic computer."
"We don't allow any of those here," Illyria said. "Everybody does math in their heads."