"Alexander Jablokov - Doing The Circuit" - читать интересную книгу автора (Jablokov Alexander)

DOING THE CIRCUIT
Alexander Jablokov
"So tell me, Fiona, what do you want this exercise program to achieve?"

"I'm sorry?"

"What's your goal? I'm your trainer. I have to know what you're after."

"I want, you know, a flatter stomach?"

I make a note on my sheet. "Okay."

"And, like, a tighter butt?"

"Fine."

"And I want to be able to brachiate."

"Brachiate? Swing through the trees like a gibbon?"

"A siamang, actually. Yeah. And I want to climb. It's in this year: radar antennas, buildings under
construction, power plant cooling towers...."

"Good, great."

"But it's not just fitness for me. You see, I've got this girlfriend?"

I don't want to hear it. "We'll work biceps, lats, all that. Some surgical modification of the rotator cuff
may prove necessary...do you understand that?"

"Yes."

"It can be done as an outpatient procedure. And your arms need to be lengthened. That's a little more
complicated. We'll insert lengths of titanium alloy into your humerus, ulna, and radius. We've found that
gives us the best balance of flexibility versus strength."

"Great! My girlfriend will love that."

I'm not really in any mood to discuss girlfriends. "Those fashion 'ceps of yours...very impressive, Fiona.
Climbing a long-time ambition for you?"

Her biceps are massive, craggy massifs, and loom from holes cut in her denim sleeves.

"You know what's funny? I didn't have any idea when I had these installed. I just liked that tectonic look,
you know? These are my two favorites. The right one's the Eiger, the left is K2."

The Eiger's infamous North Face, just a trace of snow clinging in the cracks, is particularly striking, a
death waiting to happen.

"But if you want the hylobatidae mods...." I begin.