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Douglas Adams' Starship Titanic
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'And so which of these planets is the Earth?' It was a simple question Rodden had asked, but it threw the three Earth folk into utter confusion.'I think it's the fourth planet from the Sun,' ventured Dan.'Or is it the third?' asked Nettie.'It's the second!' said Lucy.The Navigational Officer had to excuse himself at this point. He left the Bridge and locked himself in the washroom, where he proceeded to bang his head against the sink unit for several minutes. How could any living creatures be so utterly and abysmally ignorant of their own planet?!'Look!' said Dan. 'On the outside: Pluto - right?''Yes.''Neptune... Saturn... or is it Jupiter next?''Saturn,' said Nettie.'Saturn... Jupiter... Mars... Earth! So it's the sixth planet in!''Very good!' exclaimed Captain Bolfass. 'Then we are approaching it at this very moment! Stand by to fire retardation rockets and stabilize ship for slow-down! Orbit around Earth to be established in thirty-five edoes time. Landing by small landing craft.'By the time the Navigational Officer came out of the washroom, the Starship Titanic was in orbit around the Earth.'Do the Starship's windows make everything look red?' asked Nettie.'Maybe it's the weather,' said Lucy. The Earth did look extremely red.'Ladies and gentlemen,' said Captain Bolfass. 'It is my privilege to accompany you down to your landing craft. If you would follow me...''Hang on!' said Nettie. 'We missed out Uranus! This is Mars!'The Navigational Officer left the room again. He could feel one of those terrible Yassaccan rages overtaking him. In the washroom, he got out his SD gun and blew his own head off. After which he calmed down and returned to the Bridge.By this time, they were approaching a blue planet, patched with brown and flecked with white whorls. It was definitely the Earth, and even old Rodden couldn't help feeling sympathetically towards the three Earth folk as he saw their spirits rise and their hearts beat with pride and wonder at this vision of the planet that had given then life.
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Douglas Adams' Starship Titanic
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'And so which of these planets is the Earth?' It was a simple question Rodden had asked, but it threw the three Earth folk into utter confusion.'I think it's the fourth planet from the Sun,' ventured Dan.'Or is it the third?' asked Nettie.'It's the second!' said Lucy.The Navigational Officer had to excuse himself at this point. He left the Bridge and locked himself in the washroom, where he proceeded to bang his head against the sink unit for several minutes. How could any living creatures be so utterly and abysmally ignorant of their own planet?!'Look!' said Dan. 'On the outside: Pluto - right?''Yes.''Neptune... Saturn... or is it Jupiter next?''Saturn,' said Nettie.'Saturn... Jupiter... Mars... Earth! So it's the sixth planet in!''Very good!' exclaimed Captain Bolfass. 'Then we are approaching it at this very moment! Stand by to fire retardation rockets and stabilize ship for slow-down! Orbit around Earth to be established in thirty-five edoes time. Landing by small landing craft.'By the time the Navigational Officer came out of the washroom, the Starship Titanic was in orbit around the Earth.'Do the Starship's windows make everything look red?' asked Nettie.'Maybe it's the weather,' said Lucy. The Earth did look extremely red.'Ladies and gentlemen,' said Captain Bolfass. 'It is my privilege to accompany you down to your landing craft. If you would follow me...''Hang on!' said Nettie. 'We missed out Uranus! This is Mars!'The Navigational Officer left the room again. He could feel one of those terrible Yassaccan rages overtaking him. In the washroom, he got out his SD gun and blew his own head off. After which he calmed down and returned to the Bridge.By this time, they were approaching a blue planet, patched with brown and flecked with white whorls. It was definitely the Earth, and even old Rodden couldn't help feeling sympathetically towards the three Earth folk as he saw their spirits rise and their hearts beat with pride and wonder at this vision of the planet that had given then life.
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