"James Patrick Kelly - The Best Christmas Ever" - читать интересную книгу автора (Kelly James Patrick)

had done nothing but watch classic commercials with the sound off since he had fallen out of bed. The cat
was curled on the man's lap, pretending to be asleep.




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"Cookies, Bertie," said Aunty Em. "Fresh from the oven, oven fresh." She set the plate down on the end
table next to the Waterford lead crystal vase filled with silk daffodils.
"Not hungry," he said. On the mint-condition 34-inch Sony Hi-Scan television Ronald McDonald was
dancing with some kids.

Aunty Em stepped in front of the screen, blocking his view. "Have you decided what you want for
Christmas, dear?"

"It isn't Christmas." He waved her away from the set, but she didn't budge. He did succeed in disturbing
the cat, which stood, arched its back, and then dropped to the floor.

"No, of course it isn't." She laughed. "Christmas isn't until next week."

He aimed the remote at the set and turned up the sound. A man was talking very fast. "Two all beef
patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese тАж"

Aunty Em pressed the off button with her knee. "I'm talking to you, Bertie."

The man lowered the remote. "What's today?"

"Today is Friday." She considered. "Yes, Friday."

"No, I mean the date."

"The date is тАж let me see. The twenty-first."

His skin temperature had risen from 33┬░C to 37┬░. "The twenty-first of what?" he said.

She stepped away from the screen. "Have another cookie, Bertie."

"All right." He turned the television on and muted it. "You win." A morose Maytag repairman slouched at
his desk, waiting for the phone to ring. "I know what I want," said the man. "I want a Glock 17."