"Moorcock, Michael - Behold The Man2" - читать интересную книгу автора (Moorcock Michael)

in the confessional supplied a panacea; the psychiatrists tried
to cure, and most of the time they failed. But at least they
tried, he thought, and then wondered if that was, after all,
a virtue.
"I did look at myself," he said.
Was she sleeping? He turned. Her wary eyes were still
open, looking out of the window.
"I did look at myself," he repeated. "The way Jung did.
'How can I help those persons if I am myself a fugitive and
perhaps also suffer from the morbus sacer of a neurosis?'
That's what Jung asked himself. . . ."
"That old sensationalist. That old rationalizer of. his own
mysticism. No wonder you never became a psychiatrist."
"I wouldn't have been any good. It was nothing to do
with Jung. . . ."
"Don't take it out on me. . . ."
"You've told me yourself that you feel the sameyou
think it's useless. . . ."
"After a hard week's work, I might say that. Give me an-
other fag."
He opened the packet on the bedside table and put two
cigarettes in his mouth, lighting them and handing one to
her.
Almost abstractedly, he noticed that the tension was in-
creasing. The argument was, as ever, pointless. But it was
not the argument that was the important thing; it was simply
the expression of the essential relationship. He wondered if
that was in any way important, either.
"You're not telling the truth." He realized that there was
no stopping now that the ritual was in full swing.
"I'm telling the practical truth. I've no compulsion to give
up my work. I've no wish to be a failure. . . ."
"Failure? You're more melodramatic than I am."
"You're too earnest, Karl. You want to get out of yourself
a bit."
He sneered. "If I were you, I'd give up my work, Monica.
You're no more suited for it than I was."
She shrugged. "You're a petty bastard."
"I'm not jealous of you, if that's what you think. You'll
never understand what I'm looking for."
Her laugh was artificial, brittle. "Modem man in search
of a soul, eh? Modern man in search of a crutch, I'd say.
And you can take that any way you like."
"We're destroying the myths that make the world go
round."
"Now you say 'And what are we putting in their place?'
You're stale and stupid, Karl. You've never looked rationally
at anythingincluding yourself."
"What of it? You say the myth is unimportant."
"The reality that creates it is important."