"No Woman Born" - читать интересную книгу автора (Moore C. L)

(In that moment of intolerable suspense his complex human brain
paused suddenly, annihilating time in its own way, and withdrew to a cool corner of its own to analyze in a flashing second what it was he had just seen. The brain could do it timelessly; words are slow. But he knew he had watched a sort of tesseract of human motion, a parable of fourth-dimensional activity. A one-dimensional point, moved through space, creates a two-dimensional line, which in motion creates a three-dimensional cube. Theoretically the cube, in motion, would produce a fourth-dimensional figure. No human creature had ever seen a figure of three dimensions moved through space and time beforeЧuntil this moment. She had not blurred; every motion she made was distinct, but not like moving figures on a strip of film. Not like anything that those who use our language had ever seen before,.or created words to express. The mind saw, but without perceiving. Neither words nor thoughts could resolve what happened into terms for human brains. And perhaps she had not actually and literally moved through the fourth dimension. PerhapsЧsince Harris was able to see herЧit had been almost and not quite that unimaginable thing. But it was close enough.)
While to the slow mindТs eye she was still standing at the far end of the room, she was already at MaltzerТs side, her long, flexible fingers gentle but very firm upon his arms. She waitedЧ The room shimmered. There was sudden violent heat beating upon HarrisТ face. Then the air steadied again and Deirdre was saying softly, in a mournful whisper:
УIТm sorryЧI had to do it. IТm sorryЧI didnТt mean you to knowЧФ
Time caught up with Harris. He saw it overtake Maltzer too, saw the man jerk convulsively away from the grasping hands, in a ludicrously futile effort to forestall what had already happened. Even thought was slow, compared with DeirdreТs swiftness.
The sharp outward jerk was strong. It was strong enough to break the grasp of human hands and catapult Maltzer out and down into the swimming gulfs of New York. The mind leaped ahead to a logical conclusion and saw him twisting and turning and diminishing with dreadful rapidity to a tiny point of darkness that dropped away through sunlight toward the shadows near the earth. The mind even conjured up a shrill, thin cry that plummeted away with the falling body and hung behind it in the shaken air.
But the mind was reckoning on human factors.
Very gently and smoothly Deirdre lifted Maltzer from the window sill and with effortless ease carried him well back into the safety of the room. She set him down before a sofa and her golden fingers
unwrapped themselves from his arms slowly, so that he could regain control of his own body before she released him.
He sank to the sofa without a word. Nobody spoke for an unmeasurable length of time. Harris could not. Deirdre waited patiently. It was Maltzer who regained speech first, and it came back on the old track, as if his mind had not yet relinquished the rut it had worn so deep.
УAll right,Ф he said breathlessly. УAll right, you can stop me this time. But I know, you see. I know! You canТt hide your feeling from me, Deirdre. I know the trouble you feel. And next timeЧnext time I wonТt wait to talk!Ф
Deirdre made the sound of a sigh. She had no lungs to expel the breath she was imitating, but it was hard to realize that. It was hard to understand why she was not panting heavily from the terrible exertion of the past minutes; the mind knew why, but could not accept the reason. She was still too human.
УYou still donТt see,Ф she said. УThink, Maltzer, think!Ф
There was a hassock beside the sofa. She sank upon it gracefully, clasping her robed knees. Her head tilted back to watch MaltzerТs face. She saw only stunned stupidity on it now; he had passed through too much emotional storm to think at all.
УAll right,Ф she told him. УListenЧIТll admit it. YouТre right. I am unhappy. I do know what you said was trueЧbut not for the reason you think. Humanity and I are far apart, and drawing farther. The gap will be hard to bridge. Do you hear me, Maltzer?Ф
Harris saw the tremendous effort that went into MaltzerТs wakening. He saw the man pull his mind back into focus and sit up on the sofa with weary stiffness.
УYou. . . you do admit it, then?Ф he asked in a bewildered voice.
Deirdre shook her head sharply.
УDo you still think of me as delicate?Ф she demanded. УDo you know I carried you here at armТs length halfway across the room? Do you realize you weigh nothing to me? I couldФЧshe glanced around the room and gestured with sudden, rather appalling violenceЧФtear this building down,Ф she said quietly. УI could tear my way through these walls, I think. IТve found no limit yet to the strength I can put forth if I try.Ф She held up her golden hands and looked at them. УThe metal would break, perhaps,Ф she said reflectively, Уbut then, I have no feelingЧФ
Maltzer gasped, УDeirdreЧФ
She looked up with what must have been a smile. It sounded clearly
in her voice. УOh, I wonТt. I wouldnТt have to do it with my hands, if I wanted. LookЧlisten!Ф
She put her head back and a deep, vibrating hum gathered and grew in what one still thought of as her throat. It deepened swiftly and the ears began to ring. It was deeper, and the furniture vibrated. The walls began almost imperceptibly to shake. The room was full and bursting with a sound that shook every atom upon its neighbor with a terrible, disrupting force.
The sound ceased. The humming died. Then Deirdre laughed and made another and quite differently pitched sound. It seemed to reach out like an arm in one straight directionЧtoward the window. The opened panel shook. Deirdre intensified her hum, and slowly, with imperceptible jolts that merged into smoothness, the window jaried itself shut.
УYou see?Ф Deirdre said. УYou see?Ф
But still Maltzer could only stare. Harris was staring too, his mind beginning slowly to accept what she implied. Both were too stunned to leap ahead to any conclusions yet.
Deirdre rose impatiently and began to pace again, in a ringing of metal robe and a twinkling of reflected lights. She was pantherlike in her suppleness. They could see the power behind that lithe motion now; they no longer thought of her as helpless, but they were far still from grasping the truth.
УYou were wrong about me, Maltzer,Ф she said with an effort at patience in her voice. УBut you were right too, in a way you didnТt guess. IТm not afraid of humanity. I havenТt anything to fear from them. WhyФЧher voice took on a tinge of contemptЧФalready IТve set a fashion in womenТs clothing. By next week you wonТt see a woman on the street without a mask like mine, and every dress that isnТt cut like a chlamys will be out of style. IТm not afraid of humanity! I wonТt lose touch with them unless I want to. IТve learned a lotЧIТve learned too much already.Ф
Her voice faded for a moment, and Harris had a quick and appalling vision of her experimenting in the solitude of her farm, testing the range of her voice, testing her eyesightЧcould she see microscopically and telescopically?Чand was her hearing as abnormally flexible as her voice?
УYou were afraid I had lost feeling and scent and taste,Ф she went on, still pacing with that powerful, tigerish tread. УHearing and sight would not be enough, you think? But why do you think sight is the last of the senses? It may be the latest, MaltzerЧHarrisЧbut why do you think itТs the last?Ф
She may not have whispered that. Perhaps it was only their hearing that made it seem thin and distant, as the brain contracted and would not let the thought come through in its stunning entirety.
УNo,Ф Deirdre said, УI havenТt lost contact with the human race. I never will, unless I want to. ItТs too easy. . - too easy.Ф
She was watching her shining feet as she paced, and her masked face was averted. Sorrow sounded in her soft voice now.
УI didnТt mean to let you know,Ф she said. УI never would have, if this hadnТt happened. But I couldnТt let you go believing youТd failed. You made a perfect machine, Maltzer. More perfect than you knew.Ф
УBut DeirdreЧФ breathed Maltzer, his eyes fascinated and still incredulous upon her, Уbut Deirdre, if we did succeedЧwhatТs wrong? I can feel it nowЧIТve felt it all along. YouТre so unhappyЧyou still are. Why, Deirdre?Ф
She lifted her head and looked at him, eyelessly, but with a piercing stare.
УWhy are you so sure of that?Ф she asked gently.
УYou think I could be mistaken, knowing you as I do? But IТm not Frankenstein. . . you say my creationТs flawless. Then whatЧФ
УCould you ever duplicate this body?Ф she asked.
Maltzer glanced down at his shaking hands. УI donТt know. I doubt it. IЧФ
УCould anyone else?Ф
He was silent. Deirdre answered for him. УI donТt believe anyone could. I think I was an accident. A sort of mutation halfway between flesh and metal. Something accidental and . . . and unnatural, turning off on a wrong course of evolution that never reaches a dead end. Another brain in a body like this might die or go mad, as you thought I would. The synapses are too delicate. You wereЧcall it luckyЧwith me. From what I know now, I donТt think a . . . a baroque like me could happen again.Ф She paused a moment. УWhat you did was kindle the fire for the Phoenix, in a way. And the Phoenix rises perfect and renewed from its own ashes. Do you remember why it had to reproduce itself that way?Ф
Maltzer shook his head.
УIТll tell you,Ф she said. УIt was because there was only one Phoenix. Only one in the whole world.Ф
They looked at each other in silence. Then Deirdre shrugged a little.
УHe always came out of the fire perfect, of course. IТm not weak, Maltzer. You neednТt let that thought bother you any more. IТm not
vulnerable and helpless. IТm not sub-human.Ф She laughed dryly. УI suppose,Ф she said, Уthat IТmЧsuperhuman.Ф
УButЧnot happy.Ф
УIТm afraid. It isnТt unhappiness, MaltzerЧitТs fear. I donТt want to draw so far away from the human race. I wish I neednТt. ThatТs why IТm going back on the stageЧto keep in touch with them while I can. But I wish there could be others like me. IТm . - . IТm lonely, Maltzer.Ф
Silence again. Then Maltzer said, in a voice as distant as when he had spoken to them through glass, over gulfs as deep as oblivion: