Though I had little liking for Yngilda, I found her brother
Toross unlike her. In the autumn of that year, soon after we
returned to Ithkrypt, he came riding over the hills with a small
escort, their swords all scabbarded with peace-strings, ready to
take part in the fall hunt that would fill our winter larder after
the kills were salted down.
Differing from his sister in body as well as in mind, he was a
slender, well-set youth, his hair more red than the usual bronze of
a dalesman. He possessed a quick wit and a gift of song that he
used to advantage in the hall at night.
I heard Dame Math say to one of her women that that one, meaning
Toross, could well carry a water horn through life to collect the
tears of maids sighing after him. Yet he did nothing to provoke
such admiration; never courted their notice, being as ready in
riding and practice of arms as any of the men, and well-accepted by
them.
But to me he was a friend such as I had not found before. He
taught me the words of many songs and how to finger his own
knee-harp. Now and then he would bring me a branch of brilliant
leaves clipped at their autumn splendor, or some like trifle to
delight the eye.
Not that he had much time for such pleasures, for this was a
bustling time when there was much to be done for the ordering of
supplies against the coming of cold days. We stewed some fruits and
set them in jars with parchment tied firmly over the mouths; dried
other such; brought forth heavy clothing and inspected it for the
need of repairs.
More and more of this Dame Math left to my ordering, as she said
that now I was so nigh in years to becoming the lady of my lord's
household I must have the experience of such ways. I made mistakes,
but I also learned much, because I had no mind to be shamed before
strangers in another keep. And I felt more than a little pride when
my uncle would notice with approval some dish of my contriving. He
had a sweet tooth, and rose and violet sugars spun artfully into
flowers were to him an amusing conceit with which to end a meal,
and one of my greater triumphs.
Though I busied myself so by day, and even a little by lamplight
in the evening when we dealt with the clothing, yet I could not
altogether thrust out of mind some of the thoughts Yngilda had left
with me. Thus I did something in secret that otherwise only a much
younger maid would have thought on.
There was a well to the west in the dale that had a story about
it — that if one went there when the full moon was reflected on its
water surface and cast in a pin, then luck would follow. Thus, not
quite believing, yet still drawn by some small hope that perhaps
there was luck to be gained by this device, I stole away at
moonrise (which was no small task in itself) and cut across the
newly harvested fields to the well.
The night was chill, and I pulled high the hood of my cloak.
Then I stood looking down at the silvered reflections in the water
and I held out my pin, ready to drop it into the disk mirrored
there. However, before I released it, the reflection appeared to
shiver and change into something else. For a long moment I was sure
that what I had seen there had been far different from the moon,
more like a crystal ball. I must have dropped the pin without being
aware, for suddenly there was a troubling of the water, and the
vision, if vision it had been, was gone.
I was so startled that I forgot the small spell-rhyme I should
have spoken at that moment. So my luck-bringing was for naught, and
I laughed at my own action as I turned and ran from the well.
That there is ensorcellment and spell-laying in the world we all
know. There are the Wisewomen who are learned in such, as well as
others, such as the Past-Abbess, who have control over powers most
men do not understand. One can evoke some of these powers if one
has the gift and the training, but I had neither. Perhaps it is
better not to dabble in such matters, Only — why at that moment had
I seen again (if I had in truth seen it) that englobed gryphon?
Gryphon — beneath the folds of my cloak my fingers sought and
found the outlines of that beast as it was stitched upon my tabard.
It was the symbol of the House of Ulm, to which I was now bound by
solemn oath. What was he like, my thoughts spun on, this unseen,
unknown lord of mine? Why had he never sent to me such a likeness
of himself as Yngilda carried? Monster — Yngilda had no reason to
speak spiteful lies, there must lie some core of truth in what she
had said to me. There was one way.
Gifts came yearly from Ulmsdale on my name-day. Suppose that
when they were brought this year, I sought out the leader of the
party bringing them, asked of him a boon to be carried to his lord:
that we exchange our likenesses. I had my own picture, limned by
uncle's scribe, who had such a talent. Yes, that was what I would
do!
It seemed to me in that moment that perhaps the well had
answered me by putting that thought into my head. So I sped,
content, back to the hall, pleased that none there had marked my
absence.
Now I set to work upon a project of my own. That was making a
suitable case for the picture drawn on parchment. As deftly as I
could, I mounted it on a piece of polished wood.
For it I then worked a small bag, the fore-part embroidered with
the gryphon, the back with the broken sword. I hoped my lord could
understand my subtle meaning: that I was dutifully looking forward
to Ulmsdale; that Ithkrypt was my past, not my future. This I did
in secret and in stolen moments of time, for I had no mind to let
others know my plan. But I had no time to hide it one late
afternoon when Toross came upon me without warning.
The mounted picture lay before me in the open, as I had been
using it to measure. When he saw it he said sharply, "There is one
here, kinswoman, who sees you well as you are. Whose hand limned
this?"
"Archan, my uncle's scribe."
"And for whom have you had it limned?"
Again there was that sharp note in his voice, as if he had a
right to demand such an answer from me. I was more than a little
surprised, and also displeased, that he would use such a tone,
where before he had been all courtesy and soft speeches.
"It is to be a surprise for my Lord Kerovan. Soon he will send
my name-day gifts. This I shall return to him." I disliked having
to spread my plan before him, yet his question had been too direct
to evade.
"Your lord!" He turned his face a little from me. "One forgets
these ties exist, Joisan. Do you ever think what it will mean to go
among strangers, to a lord you have never seen?" Again that
roughness in his speech, which I could not understand. I did not
think it kind of him to seize so upon a hidden fear this way and
drag it out before my eyes.
I put aside my needle, took up the picture and the unfinished
case, and wrapped them in the cloth wherein I kept them, without
answering him. I had no intention of saying "yes" or "no" to that
question which he had no right to ask. "Joisan — there is the right
of bride-refusal!" The words burst from him as he stood there
with his head still averted. His hands were laced upon his sword
belt, and I saw his fingers tighten and press.
'To so dishonor his House and mine?" I returned. "Do you deem me
such a nothing? What a poor opinion you carry of me, kinsman! What
have I done to make you believe I would openly shame any man?"
"Man!" He swung around to face me now. There was a tautness to
his mouth, an expression about his eyes I had never seen before.
"Do you not know what they say of the heir of Ulmsdale? Man — what
was your uncle thinking of when he agreed to such a match? Joisan,
no one can hold a maid to such a bargain when she has been betrayed
within its bonds! Be wise for yourself and think of refusal —
now!"
I arose. In me anger grew warm. But it is in my nature that when
I am most in ire I am also the most placid seeming outwardly. For
which, perhaps, I should thank fortune, for many times has it given
me good armor.
"Kinsman, you forget yourself. Such speech is unseemly, and I
know shame that you could think me so poor a thing as to listen to
it. You had better learn to guard your tongue." So saying I left
him, not heeding his quick attempt to keep me there.
Then I climbed to my own small chamber and there stood by the
northward window, gazing out into the dusk. I was shivering, but
not with the cold; rather with that fear I thought I had overcome
in the weeks since Yngilda had planted it in my mind.
Yngilda's spite, and now this strange outburst from Toross, who,
I had not believed, could have said such a thing to me! The right
of bride-refusal, yes, that existed. But the few times it had
been invoked in the past had led to death feuds between the Houses
so involved. Monster — Yngilda had said that. And now Toross —
repeating the word "man" as if it could not be applied to my lord!
Yet my uncle would not wish to use me ill, and surely he had
considered very well the marriage proposal when it had first been
made to him. I had also Dame Math's solemn oath.
I longed all at once for the garden of the Past-Abbess Malwinna.
To her alone could I speak on this matter. Dame Math's stand I
already knew: that my lord was a victim of misfortune. This I could
believe more readily than that he was in any way not a man. For
after sworn oaths between my uncle and his father, such a thing
could not be. And I heartened myself by such sensible council,
pinning additional hope on my plan to send Kerovan the picture.
But thereafter I avoided Toross as much as I could, though he
made special attempts several times to have private conversation
with me. I could claim duties enough to keep me aloof, and claim
them I speedily did. Then there came a day when he had private
conversation with my uncle, and before the day's end he and his men
rode out of Ithkrypt. Dame Math was summoned to my uncle, and
thereafter Archan came to bring me also.
My uncle was scowling as I had seen him do at times when he was
crossed in some matter. And that scowl was turned blackly on me as
I entered.
"What is this boil of trouble you have started, wench?" His
voice was only slightly below a roar, aimed at me when I was
scarcely within the doorway. "Are you so light of word that you —
"
Dame Math arose from her chair. Her face was as anger-cast as
his, but she looked at him, not me.
"We shall have Joisan's word before you speak so!" Her lower
tone cut across his. "Joisan, this day Toross came to your uncle
and spoke of bride-refusal — "
It was my turn to interrupt; my anger also heated by such an
accusation from my uncle, before he had asked my position in the
matter.
"So did he speak to me also. I told him I would not listen; nor
am I an oath-breaker! Or do you, who know me well, also believe
that?"
Dame Math nodded. "It is as I thought. Has Joisan lived under
your eyes for all these years without your knowing her for what she
is? What said Toross to you, Joisan?"
"He seemed to think evil concerning my Lord Kerovan, and that I
should use bride-refusal not to go to him. I told him what I
thought of his shameful words and left him, nor would I have any
private speech with him thereafter."
"Bride-refusal!" My uncle brought his fist down on the table
with the thump of a war drum. "Is that youngling mad? To start a
blood feud, not only with Ulmsdale, but half the north who would
stand beside Ulric in such a matter! Why does he urge this?"
There was frost in Dame Math's eyes, a certain quirk to her lips
which suggested that she was not altogether displeased at his
asking that
"I can think of two reasons, brother. One stemming from his own
hot blood. The other placed in his mind by — "
"Enough! There is no need to list what may or may not have moved
Toross to this folly. Now listen, girl," he swung on me again.
"Ulric took oath that his heir was fit to be the lord of any woman.
That his wife was disordered in her wits when the lad was born,
that all men know. She so took such a dislike to the child she
named him monster, which he is not. Also Ulric spoke with me
privately upon a matter which has much to do with this, and which I
tell you now, but you shall keep mum-mouthed about it hereafter —
remember that, girl!"
"I shall so." I gave him my promise when he paused as if
expecting that assurance from me.
"Well enough. Then listen — there is always something behind
such wild tales when you hear them, so learn in the future to
winnow the true from the false.
"The Lady Tephana, who is your lord's mother (and a fine mother
she has been to him!), had an elder son Hlymer, by her first
marriage. Since he got no lands from his father, she brought him
with her to Ulmsdale. In addition she has had a daughter — Lisana —
who is but one year younger than your lord.
"This daughter she has seen betrothed to one of her own House.
And the daughter she dotes upon with all the affection to equal her
distaste for Kerovan. Thus Ulric of Ulmsdale has reason to believe
that within his own household lie seeds of trouble for his heir —
for Hlymer makes common cause with Lisana's betrothed, and they see
a lord to come who is not Kerovan. Ulric can make no move against
them, for he has no proof. But because he would not see his son
despoiled when he could no longer protect him, he wished some
strong tie for Kerovan, to unite him with a House that would
support him when the time comes that he needs shields raised for
him.
"Since no man can sit in the high seat of a keep who is not
sound of body and mind, how better create doubt in possible
supporters for a threatened heir than by bending rumor to one's
use, spreading tales of 'monsters' and the like? You have seen what
happens when such tales come into the hearing of those who do not
guess what may lie behind their telling. Toross came to me with
such a story — he is filled with it. Since I am sworn not to
reveal, save to the parties most deeply concerned, any of Ulric's
fears for the future, I bade Toross ride forth if he could not hold
his tongue. But that you might have listened to him — "
I shook my head. "It was he who came to me with it. But I had
already heard such a tale in greater detail from his sister in
Trevamper."
"So Math told me." The flush had faded from my uncle's face. Now
I knew he was slightly ashamed of the way he had greeted me, not
that he would ever say so. But such things had always been
understood between us.
"You see, girl," he continued, "how far this story has spread. I
do not think Ulric is altogether wise in not better ordering his
household. But each man is lord in his own keep and needs must face
his own shadows there. But know this — your wedded lord is such a
man as you will be proud to hand-fast when the time comes — as it
will soon now. Take no heed of these rumors, knowing their source
and purpose."
"For which knowing I give thanks," I replied.
When Dame Math and I left his company together, she drew me
apart into her own chamber and looked at me searchingly, as if by
that steady gaze alone she could hunt out every unspoken thought
within my mind.
"How chanced Toross to speak to you on this matter? He must have
had some reason — one does not so easily break custom. You are a
wedded lady, Joisan, not an unspoken-for maid who allows her eyes
to stray this way or that."
So I told her of my plan. To my surprise she did not object nor
seem to think what I was doing was beneath the dignity of my
station. Instead she nodded briskly.
"What you do is fitting, Joisan. Perhaps we should have arranged
such an exchange ourselves long ago. That would have broken such
rumors. Had you had a picture of Kerovan in your belt-purse when
Yngilda spoke to you, it would have answered well. So Toross was
angered at what you did? It was past time when that youth should
have returned to those who sent him to make trouble!" She was angry
again, but not with me. Only what moved her now she did not
explain.
So I finished the picture case, and Dame Math approved its
making as an excellent example of my best needlecraft. Making all
ready, I laid it away in my coffer against the arrival of the party
from Ulmsdale.
They were several days late, and the party itself was different
from the earlier ones, for the armsmen were older, and several of
them bore old, healed wounds which would keep them from active
field service. Their leader was crooked of back and walked with a
lurch and a dip.
Besides a casket that he delivered with ceremony to me, he bore
a message tube sealed with Ulric's symbol for my uncle and was
straightway taken into private conversation with him, as if this
were a matter of great import. I wondered if my summons to Ulmsdale
had come at last. But the nature of the bearer was such that I
could not accept that. My lord would have come himself as was
right, and with a retinue to do me honor through those lands we
must cross to his home.
Within the casket was a necklet of northern amber and gold
beads, with a girdle to match. Truly a gift to show me prized. Yet
I wished it had been just such a picture as I had ready to return
to him. I knew that Dame Math would make opportunity to let me
speak alone with this Jago who commanded the Ulmsdale force, that I
might entrust him with my gift. But it appeared he had so much to
say to my uncle there was little time for that, for he did not come
out of the inner chamber until the hour for the evening meal.
I was glad he was seated beside me, for it gave me a chance to
say that I would see him privately, that I had something to entrust
to him. But he had a speech in return.
"Lady, you have had Ulmsdale's gift, but I have another for you
from the hand of Lord Kerovan himself which he said to give to you
privately — "
Within me I knew then a rise of excitement, for I could conceive
of nothing save that we had been of one mind, and what Jago had for
me was also a picture.
But it was not so. When Dame Math saw that we came together in a
nook between the high seat and the wall, what he laid in my eager
hand was not a flat packet, but a small, round one. Quickly I
pulled away covering of soft wool to find that I held a crystal
globe and within it a gryphon — even as I had seen it at the House
of Dames! I nearly dropped it For to have something of the Power
touch into one's life so was a thing to hold in awe and fear. Set
in its surface just above the gryphon's head was a ring of gold,
and there was strung a chain so one could wear it as a pendant.
"A wondrous thing!" Somehow I found my tongue and hoped that I
had not betrayed my first fear. For to no one could I explain the
momentary panic I had felt. The more I studied it now, the clearer
became its beauty, and I thought that it was truly a treasure,
finer than any that had ever been sent to me in any casket of
ceremony.
"Yes. My lord begs you accept of this, and perhaps wear it
sometimes, that you may know his concern for you." That sounded
like some set speech which he had memorized. And I decided swiftly
to ask no questions of this man. Perhaps he was not too close to my
lord after all.
'Tell my lord I take great joy in his gift." I found the formal
words easier than I would have done a moment earlier. "It shall
abide with me night and day that I may look upon it, not only for
my pleasure in its beauty, but also because of his concern for me.
In return," I hurriedly brought forth my own gift, "do you place
this in my lord's hand. Ask of him, if he wills, to send its like
to me when he may."
"Be sure that your wish is my command, Lady." Jago slipped it
into his belt-purse. Before he could say more, if there was more to
be said between us, there came one of my uncle's men to summon him
again to that inner room, and I did not see him further that
night.
Nor did we have more than formal speech together during the two
remaining days that he was at Ithkrypt. I gave him ceremonious
farewell when he rode forth, but by then all within the keep knew
of the news that had come with the men from Ulmsdale.
By birth and inclination dalesmen are not sea-rovers. We have
ports for trading set up along the coast, and there are villages of
fisherfolk to be found there. But deep-sea ships do not sail under
the flag of any dales lord. And those who trade from overseas, such
as the Sulcarmen, are not of our blood and kin.
News from overseas is long old before it reaches us. But we had
heard many times that the eastern lands were locked in a struggle
for power between nation and nation. Now and then there was mention
of a country, a city, or even some warlord or leader whose deeds
reached us in such garbled form they were already well on the way
to becoming a tale more fancy than fact.
Of late, however, there had been new ships nosing along our
shores. The Sulcarmen had suffered some grievous defeat of their
own two years since in the eastern waters. And so we had not the
usual number of their traders coming for our woolen cloth, our
wonder-metal from the Waste, our freshwater pearls. But these
others had put in to haggle, driving hard bargains, and they seemed
over-interested in our land.
Often when they had discharged a cargo, before taking on
another, they would lie in harbor, and their crews would ride north
and south as if exploring.
Our thoughts of war never encompassed more than the feuds
between dale and dale, which could be dark and bloody at times, but
which seldom involved more than a few score of men on either side.
We had no king or overlord, which was our pride, but also in a
manner our weakness, as was to be proven to us. Sometimes several
lords would combine their forces to make a counter-raid on Waste
outlaws or the like. But such alliances were always temporary. And,
while there were several lords of greater following than others
(mainly because they held richer and more populous dales), none
could send out any rallying call all others would come to.
This must have been clear to those who spied and went — that we
were feeble opponents, easy to overrun. However, they misread the
temper of the dales, for a dalesman will fight fiercely for his
freedom. And a dalesman's loyalty to his lord, who is like the head
of his own family, is seldom shaken.
Since Ulmsport lay at the mouth of that dale, it had recently
been visited by two ships of these newcomers. They called
themselves men of Alizon and spoke arrogantly of the size and might
of their overseas land. One of their men had been injured inland.
His companion from the ship had been killed. The wounded man had
been nursed by a Wisewoman. By her craft she could tell true from
false. And, while he wandered in a fever, talking much, she
listened. Later, after the coming of his comrades to bear him away,
she had gone to Lord Ulric. He had listened carefully, knowing that
she knew of what she spoke.
Lord Ulric was prudent and wise enough to see that there was
that to it which might come to overshadow our whole land, as it
did. Speedily he sent accounts of what had been learned to all the
neighboring dales, as well as to Ithkrypt.
It seemed from the babbling of the wounded man that he was
indeed a spy, the scout of an army soon to be landed on us. We
realized that those of Alizon had decided that our rule was so
feeble and weak in its nature they could overrun us at their
pleasure, and this they moved to do.
Thus was the beginning of the great shadow on our world. But I
nursed the crystal ball in my hand, uninterested in Alizon and its
spies, sure that somehow the Lord Kerovan would do as I willed, and
I would look upon the picture of a man who was no monster.
Though I had little liking for Yngilda, I found her brother
Toross unlike her. In the autumn of that year, soon after we
returned to Ithkrypt, he came riding over the hills with a small
escort, their swords all scabbarded with peace-strings, ready to
take part in the fall hunt that would fill our winter larder after
the kills were salted down.
Differing from his sister in body as well as in mind, he was a
slender, well-set youth, his hair more red than the usual bronze of
a dalesman. He possessed a quick wit and a gift of song that he
used to advantage in the hall at night.
I heard Dame Math say to one of her women that that one, meaning
Toross, could well carry a water horn through life to collect the
tears of maids sighing after him. Yet he did nothing to provoke
such admiration; never courted their notice, being as ready in
riding and practice of arms as any of the men, and well-accepted by
them.
But to me he was a friend such as I had not found before. He
taught me the words of many songs and how to finger his own
knee-harp. Now and then he would bring me a branch of brilliant
leaves clipped at their autumn splendor, or some like trifle to
delight the eye.
Not that he had much time for such pleasures, for this was a
bustling time when there was much to be done for the ordering of
supplies against the coming of cold days. We stewed some fruits and
set them in jars with parchment tied firmly over the mouths; dried
other such; brought forth heavy clothing and inspected it for the
need of repairs.
More and more of this Dame Math left to my ordering, as she said
that now I was so nigh in years to becoming the lady of my lord's
household I must have the experience of such ways. I made mistakes,
but I also learned much, because I had no mind to be shamed before
strangers in another keep. And I felt more than a little pride when
my uncle would notice with approval some dish of my contriving. He
had a sweet tooth, and rose and violet sugars spun artfully into
flowers were to him an amusing conceit with which to end a meal,
and one of my greater triumphs.
Though I busied myself so by day, and even a little by lamplight
in the evening when we dealt with the clothing, yet I could not
altogether thrust out of mind some of the thoughts Yngilda had left
with me. Thus I did something in secret that otherwise only a much
younger maid would have thought on.
There was a well to the west in the dale that had a story about
it — that if one went there when the full moon was reflected on its
water surface and cast in a pin, then luck would follow. Thus, not
quite believing, yet still drawn by some small hope that perhaps
there was luck to be gained by this device, I stole away at
moonrise (which was no small task in itself) and cut across the
newly harvested fields to the well.
The night was chill, and I pulled high the hood of my cloak.
Then I stood looking down at the silvered reflections in the water
and I held out my pin, ready to drop it into the disk mirrored
there. However, before I released it, the reflection appeared to
shiver and change into something else. For a long moment I was sure
that what I had seen there had been far different from the moon,
more like a crystal ball. I must have dropped the pin without being
aware, for suddenly there was a troubling of the water, and the
vision, if vision it had been, was gone.
I was so startled that I forgot the small spell-rhyme I should
have spoken at that moment. So my luck-bringing was for naught, and
I laughed at my own action as I turned and ran from the well.
That there is ensorcellment and spell-laying in the world we all
know. There are the Wisewomen who are learned in such, as well as
others, such as the Past-Abbess, who have control over powers most
men do not understand. One can evoke some of these powers if one
has the gift and the training, but I had neither. Perhaps it is
better not to dabble in such matters, Only — why at that moment had
I seen again (if I had in truth seen it) that englobed gryphon?
Gryphon — beneath the folds of my cloak my fingers sought and
found the outlines of that beast as it was stitched upon my tabard.
It was the symbol of the House of Ulm, to which I was now bound by
solemn oath. What was he like, my thoughts spun on, this unseen,
unknown lord of mine? Why had he never sent to me such a likeness
of himself as Yngilda carried? Monster — Yngilda had no reason to
speak spiteful lies, there must lie some core of truth in what she
had said to me. There was one way.
Gifts came yearly from Ulmsdale on my name-day. Suppose that
when they were brought this year, I sought out the leader of the
party bringing them, asked of him a boon to be carried to his lord:
that we exchange our likenesses. I had my own picture, limned by
uncle's scribe, who had such a talent. Yes, that was what I would
do!
It seemed to me in that moment that perhaps the well had
answered me by putting that thought into my head. So I sped,
content, back to the hall, pleased that none there had marked my
absence.
Now I set to work upon a project of my own. That was making a
suitable case for the picture drawn on parchment. As deftly as I
could, I mounted it on a piece of polished wood.
For it I then worked a small bag, the fore-part embroidered with
the gryphon, the back with the broken sword. I hoped my lord could
understand my subtle meaning: that I was dutifully looking forward
to Ulmsdale; that Ithkrypt was my past, not my future. This I did
in secret and in stolen moments of time, for I had no mind to let
others know my plan. But I had no time to hide it one late
afternoon when Toross came upon me without warning.
The mounted picture lay before me in the open, as I had been
using it to measure. When he saw it he said sharply, "There is one
here, kinswoman, who sees you well as you are. Whose hand limned
this?"
"Archan, my uncle's scribe."
"And for whom have you had it limned?"
Again there was that sharp note in his voice, as if he had a
right to demand such an answer from me. I was more than a little
surprised, and also displeased, that he would use such a tone,
where before he had been all courtesy and soft speeches.
"It is to be a surprise for my Lord Kerovan. Soon he will send
my name-day gifts. This I shall return to him." I disliked having
to spread my plan before him, yet his question had been too direct
to evade.
"Your lord!" He turned his face a little from me. "One forgets
these ties exist, Joisan. Do you ever think what it will mean to go
among strangers, to a lord you have never seen?" Again that
roughness in his speech, which I could not understand. I did not
think it kind of him to seize so upon a hidden fear this way and
drag it out before my eyes.
I put aside my needle, took up the picture and the unfinished
case, and wrapped them in the cloth wherein I kept them, without
answering him. I had no intention of saying "yes" or "no" to that
question which he had no right to ask. "Joisan — there is the right
of bride-refusal!" The words burst from him as he stood there
with his head still averted. His hands were laced upon his sword
belt, and I saw his fingers tighten and press.
'To so dishonor his House and mine?" I returned. "Do you deem me
such a nothing? What a poor opinion you carry of me, kinsman! What
have I done to make you believe I would openly shame any man?"
"Man!" He swung around to face me now. There was a tautness to
his mouth, an expression about his eyes I had never seen before.
"Do you not know what they say of the heir of Ulmsdale? Man — what
was your uncle thinking of when he agreed to such a match? Joisan,
no one can hold a maid to such a bargain when she has been betrayed
within its bonds! Be wise for yourself and think of refusal —
now!"
I arose. In me anger grew warm. But it is in my nature that when
I am most in ire I am also the most placid seeming outwardly. For
which, perhaps, I should thank fortune, for many times has it given
me good armor.
"Kinsman, you forget yourself. Such speech is unseemly, and I
know shame that you could think me so poor a thing as to listen to
it. You had better learn to guard your tongue." So saying I left
him, not heeding his quick attempt to keep me there.
Then I climbed to my own small chamber and there stood by the
northward window, gazing out into the dusk. I was shivering, but
not with the cold; rather with that fear I thought I had overcome
in the weeks since Yngilda had planted it in my mind.
Yngilda's spite, and now this strange outburst from Toross, who,
I had not believed, could have said such a thing to me! The right
of bride-refusal, yes, that existed. But the few times it had
been invoked in the past had led to death feuds between the Houses
so involved. Monster — Yngilda had said that. And now Toross —
repeating the word "man" as if it could not be applied to my lord!
Yet my uncle would not wish to use me ill, and surely he had
considered very well the marriage proposal when it had first been
made to him. I had also Dame Math's solemn oath.
I longed all at once for the garden of the Past-Abbess Malwinna.
To her alone could I speak on this matter. Dame Math's stand I
already knew: that my lord was a victim of misfortune. This I could
believe more readily than that he was in any way not a man. For
after sworn oaths between my uncle and his father, such a thing
could not be. And I heartened myself by such sensible council,
pinning additional hope on my plan to send Kerovan the picture.
But thereafter I avoided Toross as much as I could, though he
made special attempts several times to have private conversation
with me. I could claim duties enough to keep me aloof, and claim
them I speedily did. Then there came a day when he had private
conversation with my uncle, and before the day's end he and his men
rode out of Ithkrypt. Dame Math was summoned to my uncle, and
thereafter Archan came to bring me also.
My uncle was scowling as I had seen him do at times when he was
crossed in some matter. And that scowl was turned blackly on me as
I entered.
"What is this boil of trouble you have started, wench?" His
voice was only slightly below a roar, aimed at me when I was
scarcely within the doorway. "Are you so light of word that you —
"
Dame Math arose from her chair. Her face was as anger-cast as
his, but she looked at him, not me.
"We shall have Joisan's word before you speak so!" Her lower
tone cut across his. "Joisan, this day Toross came to your uncle
and spoke of bride-refusal — "
It was my turn to interrupt; my anger also heated by such an
accusation from my uncle, before he had asked my position in the
matter.
"So did he speak to me also. I told him I would not listen; nor
am I an oath-breaker! Or do you, who know me well, also believe
that?"
Dame Math nodded. "It is as I thought. Has Joisan lived under
your eyes for all these years without your knowing her for what she
is? What said Toross to you, Joisan?"
"He seemed to think evil concerning my Lord Kerovan, and that I
should use bride-refusal not to go to him. I told him what I
thought of his shameful words and left him, nor would I have any
private speech with him thereafter."
"Bride-refusal!" My uncle brought his fist down on the table
with the thump of a war drum. "Is that youngling mad? To start a
blood feud, not only with Ulmsdale, but half the north who would
stand beside Ulric in such a matter! Why does he urge this?"
There was frost in Dame Math's eyes, a certain quirk to her lips
which suggested that she was not altogether displeased at his
asking that
"I can think of two reasons, brother. One stemming from his own
hot blood. The other placed in his mind by — "
"Enough! There is no need to list what may or may not have moved
Toross to this folly. Now listen, girl," he swung on me again.
"Ulric took oath that his heir was fit to be the lord of any woman.
That his wife was disordered in her wits when the lad was born,
that all men know. She so took such a dislike to the child she
named him monster, which he is not. Also Ulric spoke with me
privately upon a matter which has much to do with this, and which I
tell you now, but you shall keep mum-mouthed about it hereafter —
remember that, girl!"
"I shall so." I gave him my promise when he paused as if
expecting that assurance from me.
"Well enough. Then listen — there is always something behind
such wild tales when you hear them, so learn in the future to
winnow the true from the false.
"The Lady Tephana, who is your lord's mother (and a fine mother
she has been to him!), had an elder son Hlymer, by her first
marriage. Since he got no lands from his father, she brought him
with her to Ulmsdale. In addition she has had a daughter — Lisana —
who is but one year younger than your lord.
"This daughter she has seen betrothed to one of her own House.
And the daughter she dotes upon with all the affection to equal her
distaste for Kerovan. Thus Ulric of Ulmsdale has reason to believe
that within his own household lie seeds of trouble for his heir —
for Hlymer makes common cause with Lisana's betrothed, and they see
a lord to come who is not Kerovan. Ulric can make no move against
them, for he has no proof. But because he would not see his son
despoiled when he could no longer protect him, he wished some
strong tie for Kerovan, to unite him with a House that would
support him when the time comes that he needs shields raised for
him.
"Since no man can sit in the high seat of a keep who is not
sound of body and mind, how better create doubt in possible
supporters for a threatened heir than by bending rumor to one's
use, spreading tales of 'monsters' and the like? You have seen what
happens when such tales come into the hearing of those who do not
guess what may lie behind their telling. Toross came to me with
such a story — he is filled with it. Since I am sworn not to
reveal, save to the parties most deeply concerned, any of Ulric's
fears for the future, I bade Toross ride forth if he could not hold
his tongue. But that you might have listened to him — "
I shook my head. "It was he who came to me with it. But I had
already heard such a tale in greater detail from his sister in
Trevamper."
"So Math told me." The flush had faded from my uncle's face. Now
I knew he was slightly ashamed of the way he had greeted me, not
that he would ever say so. But such things had always been
understood between us.
"You see, girl," he continued, "how far this story has spread. I
do not think Ulric is altogether wise in not better ordering his
household. But each man is lord in his own keep and needs must face
his own shadows there. But know this — your wedded lord is such a
man as you will be proud to hand-fast when the time comes — as it
will soon now. Take no heed of these rumors, knowing their source
and purpose."
"For which knowing I give thanks," I replied.
When Dame Math and I left his company together, she drew me
apart into her own chamber and looked at me searchingly, as if by
that steady gaze alone she could hunt out every unspoken thought
within my mind.
"How chanced Toross to speak to you on this matter? He must have
had some reason — one does not so easily break custom. You are a
wedded lady, Joisan, not an unspoken-for maid who allows her eyes
to stray this way or that."
So I told her of my plan. To my surprise she did not object nor
seem to think what I was doing was beneath the dignity of my
station. Instead she nodded briskly.
"What you do is fitting, Joisan. Perhaps we should have arranged
such an exchange ourselves long ago. That would have broken such
rumors. Had you had a picture of Kerovan in your belt-purse when
Yngilda spoke to you, it would have answered well. So Toross was
angered at what you did? It was past time when that youth should
have returned to those who sent him to make trouble!" She was angry
again, but not with me. Only what moved her now she did not
explain.
So I finished the picture case, and Dame Math approved its
making as an excellent example of my best needlecraft. Making all
ready, I laid it away in my coffer against the arrival of the party
from Ulmsdale.
They were several days late, and the party itself was different
from the earlier ones, for the armsmen were older, and several of
them bore old, healed wounds which would keep them from active
field service. Their leader was crooked of back and walked with a
lurch and a dip.
Besides a casket that he delivered with ceremony to me, he bore
a message tube sealed with Ulric's symbol for my uncle and was
straightway taken into private conversation with him, as if this
were a matter of great import. I wondered if my summons to Ulmsdale
had come at last. But the nature of the bearer was such that I
could not accept that. My lord would have come himself as was
right, and with a retinue to do me honor through those lands we
must cross to his home.
Within the casket was a necklet of northern amber and gold
beads, with a girdle to match. Truly a gift to show me prized. Yet
I wished it had been just such a picture as I had ready to return
to him. I knew that Dame Math would make opportunity to let me
speak alone with this Jago who commanded the Ulmsdale force, that I
might entrust him with my gift. But it appeared he had so much to
say to my uncle there was little time for that, for he did not come
out of the inner chamber until the hour for the evening meal.
I was glad he was seated beside me, for it gave me a chance to
say that I would see him privately, that I had something to entrust
to him. But he had a speech in return.
"Lady, you have had Ulmsdale's gift, but I have another for you
from the hand of Lord Kerovan himself which he said to give to you
privately — "
Within me I knew then a rise of excitement, for I could conceive
of nothing save that we had been of one mind, and what Jago had for
me was also a picture.
But it was not so. When Dame Math saw that we came together in a
nook between the high seat and the wall, what he laid in my eager
hand was not a flat packet, but a small, round one. Quickly I
pulled away covering of soft wool to find that I held a crystal
globe and within it a gryphon — even as I had seen it at the House
of Dames! I nearly dropped it For to have something of the Power
touch into one's life so was a thing to hold in awe and fear. Set
in its surface just above the gryphon's head was a ring of gold,
and there was strung a chain so one could wear it as a pendant.
"A wondrous thing!" Somehow I found my tongue and hoped that I
had not betrayed my first fear. For to no one could I explain the
momentary panic I had felt. The more I studied it now, the clearer
became its beauty, and I thought that it was truly a treasure,
finer than any that had ever been sent to me in any casket of
ceremony.
"Yes. My lord begs you accept of this, and perhaps wear it
sometimes, that you may know his concern for you." That sounded
like some set speech which he had memorized. And I decided swiftly
to ask no questions of this man. Perhaps he was not too close to my
lord after all.
'Tell my lord I take great joy in his gift." I found the formal
words easier than I would have done a moment earlier. "It shall
abide with me night and day that I may look upon it, not only for
my pleasure in its beauty, but also because of his concern for me.
In return," I hurriedly brought forth my own gift, "do you place
this in my lord's hand. Ask of him, if he wills, to send its like
to me when he may."
"Be sure that your wish is my command, Lady." Jago slipped it
into his belt-purse. Before he could say more, if there was more to
be said between us, there came one of my uncle's men to summon him
again to that inner room, and I did not see him further that
night.
Nor did we have more than formal speech together during the two
remaining days that he was at Ithkrypt. I gave him ceremonious
farewell when he rode forth, but by then all within the keep knew
of the news that had come with the men from Ulmsdale.
By birth and inclination dalesmen are not sea-rovers. We have
ports for trading set up along the coast, and there are villages of
fisherfolk to be found there. But deep-sea ships do not sail under
the flag of any dales lord. And those who trade from overseas, such
as the Sulcarmen, are not of our blood and kin.
News from overseas is long old before it reaches us. But we had
heard many times that the eastern lands were locked in a struggle
for power between nation and nation. Now and then there was mention
of a country, a city, or even some warlord or leader whose deeds
reached us in such garbled form they were already well on the way
to becoming a tale more fancy than fact.
Of late, however, there had been new ships nosing along our
shores. The Sulcarmen had suffered some grievous defeat of their
own two years since in the eastern waters. And so we had not the
usual number of their traders coming for our woolen cloth, our
wonder-metal from the Waste, our freshwater pearls. But these
others had put in to haggle, driving hard bargains, and they seemed
over-interested in our land.
Often when they had discharged a cargo, before taking on
another, they would lie in harbor, and their crews would ride north
and south as if exploring.
Our thoughts of war never encompassed more than the feuds
between dale and dale, which could be dark and bloody at times, but
which seldom involved more than a few score of men on either side.
We had no king or overlord, which was our pride, but also in a
manner our weakness, as was to be proven to us. Sometimes several
lords would combine their forces to make a counter-raid on Waste
outlaws or the like. But such alliances were always temporary. And,
while there were several lords of greater following than others
(mainly because they held richer and more populous dales), none
could send out any rallying call all others would come to.
This must have been clear to those who spied and went — that we
were feeble opponents, easy to overrun. However, they misread the
temper of the dales, for a dalesman will fight fiercely for his
freedom. And a dalesman's loyalty to his lord, who is like the head
of his own family, is seldom shaken.
Since Ulmsport lay at the mouth of that dale, it had recently
been visited by two ships of these newcomers. They called
themselves men of Alizon and spoke arrogantly of the size and might
of their overseas land. One of their men had been injured inland.
His companion from the ship had been killed. The wounded man had
been nursed by a Wisewoman. By her craft she could tell true from
false. And, while he wandered in a fever, talking much, she
listened. Later, after the coming of his comrades to bear him away,
she had gone to Lord Ulric. He had listened carefully, knowing that
she knew of what she spoke.
Lord Ulric was prudent and wise enough to see that there was
that to it which might come to overshadow our whole land, as it
did. Speedily he sent accounts of what had been learned to all the
neighboring dales, as well as to Ithkrypt.
It seemed from the babbling of the wounded man that he was
indeed a spy, the scout of an army soon to be landed on us. We
realized that those of Alizon had decided that our rule was so
feeble and weak in its nature they could overrun us at their
pleasure, and this they moved to do.
Thus was the beginning of the great shadow on our world. But I
nursed the crystal ball in my hand, uninterested in Alizon and its
spies, sure that somehow the Lord Kerovan would do as I willed, and
I would look upon the picture of a man who was no monster.