"H. Beam Piper - R. S. V. P." - читать интересную книгу автора (Piper H Beam)

civilized attitude toward this question. It appears that neither of your Excellencies has any intention of
abandoning your present war of mutual threats and blackmail until forced to do so by some overt act on
the part of one or the other of your Excellencies' Governments, which would result in physical war of
pan-Asiatic scope and magnitude. I am further convinced that this deplorable situation arises out of the
megalomaniac ambitions of the Federal Governments of the UEESR and the UPREA, respectively, and
that the different peoples of what you unblushingly call your "autonomous" republics have no ambitions
except, on a rapidly diminishing order of probability, to live out their natural span of years in peace.
Therefore:

In the name of ALLAH, the Merciful, the Compassionate: We, Shere Ali Abdallah, Ameer of
Afghanistan, etc., do decree and command that the political entities known as the Union of East
European Soviet Republics and the United Peoples' Republics of East Asia respectively are
herewith abolished and dissolved into their constituent autonomous republics, each one of which
shall hereafter enjoy complete sovereignty within its own borders as is right and proper.

Now, in case either of you gentlemen feel inclined to laugh this off, let me remind you of the series of
mysterious disappearances of some of the most noted scientists of both the UEESR and the UPREA,
and let me advise your Excellencies that these scientists are now residents and subjects of the Kingdom
of Afghanistan, and are here engaged in research and development work for my Government. These
gentlemen were not abducted, as you gentlemen seem to believe; they came here of their own free will,
and ask nothing better than to remain here, where they are treated with dignity and honor, given material
rewardsтАФriches, palaces, harems, retinues of servants, etc.тАФand are also free from the intellectual and
ideological restraints which make life so intolerable in your respective countries to any man above the
order of intelligence of a cretin. In return for these benefactions, these eminent scientists have developed,
for my Government, certain weapons. For example:

1.) A nuclear-rocket guided missile, officially designated as the Sword of Islam, vastly superior to your
Excellencies' respective guided missiles Marxist Victory and Celestial Destroyer. It should be; it was
the product of the joint efforts of Dr. Voronoff and Dr. Bao Hu-Shin, whom your Excellencies know.

2.) A new type of radar-radio-electronic defense screen, which can not only detect the approach of a
guided missile, at any velocity whatever, but will automatically capture and redirect same. In case either
of your Excellencies doubt this statement, you are invited to aim a rocket at some target in Afghanistan
and see what happens.

3.) Both the UPREA mutated virus and the UEESR contagious sterility, with positive vaccines against the
former and means of instrumental detection of the latter.

4.) A technique for initiating and controlling the Bethe carbon-hydrogen cycle. We are now using this as a
source of heat for industrial and even domestic purposes, and we also have a carbon-hydrogen cycle
bomb. Such a bomb, delivered by one of our Sword of Islam Mark IV's, was activated yesterday over
the Northern tip of Nova Zembla, at an altitude of four miles. I am enclosing photographic reproductions
of views of this test, televised to Kabul by an accompanying Sword of Islam Mark V observation
rocket. I am informed that expeditions have been sent by both the UEESR and the UPREA to
investigate; they should find some very interesting conditions. For one thing, they won't need their
climbing equipment to get over the Nova Zembla Glacier; the Nova Zembla Glacier isn't there, any more.

5.) A lithium bomb. This has not been tested, yet. A lithium bomb is nothing for a country the size of
Afghanistan to let off inside its own borders. We intend making a test with it within the next ten days,
however If your Excellencies will designate a target, which must be at the center of an uninhabited area at