"Reed, Robert - MARKET DAY" - читать интересную книгу автора (Reed Robert)

MARKET DAY

MARKET DAY

The man orders the truck to pull off the road and park.
"What should I do?" she asks.
He doesn't seem to hear. But as he's climbing down, he says, "I don't care. Do whatever you want."
She wants to follow him.
Inside, the darkness is sudden and warm, and she can smell things that are strange, then familiar. Whenever her man leaves for the night, he comes home smelling this way. He comes home happy. So this must be a good happy place, she decides.
He climbs up on a stool, setting his elbows on a long high table, then says, "Beer," to nobody in particular.
A stranger stands behind the table. He brings the beer in a thick glass, stares at her man, then just walks away.
Most of the stools are empty. She sits next to her man. There's another empty stool beside her, so she puts her feet up on it to be comfortable. She wiggles her toes. A woman sits alone next to her wiggling toes. "Hello," she says to the woman.
The woman has scars, but they barely show in the darkness. Whoever built her face made it to look pretty. Was it the standing man who built her? She has freckles and blue eyes and a smile that comes easily.
"Hello to you," the smiling woman says. Then she points at her man, her finger long and painted. "Does he belong to you?"
"It's the other way around," she explains.
Isn't it obvious?
"Does your owner want to know me?"
She asks her man, "Do you want to know her?"
"Not now," he says to his beer.
"Not now," she repeats, glad to be his only friend.
But the woman keeps smiling in her special way, waiting for the man to look at her. And when he happens to glance in her direction, she says, "Watch." And with one hand, she reaches into her mouth, pulling out all of her teeth.
With a sloppy voice, the woman says, "Imagine."
The man breathes deeply. Twice. Then he looks at the standing man, telling him, "Not now. Get her off me."
The standing man wipes his hands against his apron, then tells the toothless woman, "Put them back in. And just sit there."
The woman does what she's told.
She wonders what could she do to look as pretty as that woman. But even with the same pretty eyes and the big smile, she realizes that she wouldn't be the same. Which bothers her somehow. Why does it bother her? She thinks about that for a long while. Long enough for the man to drink another beer. Then she wonders something else. She asks the pretty woman, "Why don't you get some real teeth?"
The woman looks at her. Looks and says nothing.
"Teeth that won't come loose," she advises. Then she gives her own a good hard tug, adding, "Like these. See?"
The woman shrugs and turns away, saying nothing.
Her man starts a third beer. She looks at him, then asks, "What are you thinking?"
His thinking machine is set out on the table, unfolded and showing him words. But he doesn't seem to be reading. The words are marching past, but his eyes are glassy and sad, and faraway. They almost look wet, and she wonders what sort of dirt got in them.
Again, she asks, "What are you thinking?"
"Don't ask me that again. Ever."
He says it quietly, but not softly. He says it so that she's left hurting, wondering what's wrong and what she could do to make things better.
But then, even after warning her, he says, "I'm just reading my policy."
"Policy?" she repeats. "What's that?"
"My insurance," he says.
"What's insurance?"
"It's another kind of game." He looks over at the standing man, then whispers, "Nothing. Forget it." He folds up his thinking machine and puts it in his pocket, then shouts, "Can I get a six-pack to go?"
The standing man looks at him, then says, "If you let your car drive."
"It's a truck," her man says.
"Can it drive itself?"
"Can it?" he asks her.
Right away, she says, "Yes, and it's very fast, too!"
"Then buy anything you want," says the standing man. "Is a six-pack going to be enough?"
"Sure," says her man, climbing off the stool and heading for the door.
She jumps down, following.
The pretty new woman stays on her seat, like she's suppose to. Is she pretty because she looks so young? That woman could be five hours old, or five years old. Or she might be a mixture of old pieces and other parts that are brand new.
If I could just get some new pieces for myself, she tells herself. Then she thinks about the blue-eyed sow waiting in the truck, and the steel barn where she was born, and her man touching her softly as he does that very careful, very important work, giving her the blue eyes and soft pink freckles, too.
Her man waits long enough for her to climb into the cab. Then the truck pulls out into traffic, and they're driving again. She didn't hear him tell the truck where, but they're moving back toward the market again.
"Did court help?" she asks.
He doesn't say anything. Then he sets aside an empty beer can and asks, "What do you mean? What court?"
"That place we were," she says. "Did it help us?"
He pulls his mouth into a funny shape as he says, "Yeah, it helped. But it's no court of law. Not even close."
Whatever the place was, things are better again.
That's what matters, she tells herself. All the way to the market, she smiles and feels good about everything. But then the truck doesn't slow down like it should. It forgets where they're going, rolling past the closed gate and the long building. With her face pressed to her window, she looks at the new men looking out through the tall bars. They're not watching her. They're watching a line of people standing on the very edge of the street, each one of them holding up a sign. All of them are old people, and their signs are brightly colored, and they're chanting in one voice, making no sense. But she sounds out what words she can see on their signs as the truck swiftly carries her past them.
"Wrong," she quotes.
"Evil," she manages.
"Frank," she mutters. Then, "Stein."
Her man opens another can of beer and drinks and says nothing. He doesn't seem at all concerned that they've missed the market.
"Wrong," she repeats. "What is it that's wrong?"
He drinks his beer and almost looks at her. Then he stops himself, breathes deeply and tells her, "When you don't do what I say."
"That's wrong," she admits.
"Remember that."
When has she forgotten that? But instead of saying it, she asks, "Why did we drive past the market?"
He breathes again. Even deeper this time.
"Was it those people?" she asks. "The ones with the signs?"
"Yeah," he says. "They're part of the problem."
For a little moment, she imagines having her broom again. It's repaired and in her hands again, and she's pushing those loud people away from the market, clearing them out of the way for their truck to pass.
"Overproduction," he says.
Those are two words, she realizes. But he said them as one.
"What's 'over-production'?" she asks.
"That's the other half of this big fucking nightmare," he says. Not explaining what he means. Instead he finishes his beer and sets the empty can under his legs, and he opens still another can, giving the foam a deep long slurp.
She looks outside again.
Little buildings stand up near the street. They remind her of the market building, only nobody waits behind their gates and there aren't any cars or trucks parked in front of them. "For Sale," says one sign. "No Something-Passing," say others. But she can't concentrate on her reading just now. Her mind keeps jumping around, and she can barely think about anything at all, it seems.
The street lifts, crossing a straight ridge of dirt and grass.
On the other side of the ridge are leafless trees and new green grass, and the street turns to gravel, winding its way through the trees. She almost asks where they are. But then he explains, "This is a park."
"It's very pretty here," she offers.
"I guess," he replies, his voice sloppy and slow.
There's water up ahead. Big dark water, and she slowly realizes that it's moving. Like piss down a chute, it slides along, and she takes a breath, then says, "This looks like a very nice place."
He doesn't say anything to her.
To the truck, he says, "Park. Anywhere."
The street ends with a wide area of gravel and muddy pools. He opens another beer and says, "Jump down and come around."
Now he's talking to her.
The outside air is cold and wet. A little wind blows over the river, and she hears the wind and hears the sound of water slooshing and twisting against itself and the muddy banks. A concrete ramp vanishes into the water. It looks like a street covered by a peaceful flood. But she can't marvel at the sight because she needs to come all the way around the truck.
"I'm drunk," he tells her.
His voice sounds wet and sad and clumsy.
"Help me down, would you?"
Gladly. She reaches up and grabs one hand and its arm, and she eases him down to where he can stand upright, propped against the truck.
"My other beers...give them to me..."
Not so gladly, she obeys him.
"Stay there."
It hurts, watching him stagger over to a nearby bench. But he manages to sit and open up another can of beer, and before he takes his first sip, he looks up and says, "Get the tool box. From behind the seat."
The tool box is heavy and clumsy. And loud when she sets it on the ground.
"There's a thick gray wire," he says. "Under that wheel there. Inside the cab, yeah. I want you to unfasten it."
She asks, "How?"
He seems to consider that simple question. Then he says, "With the pry bar. Just jerk it right off there...!"
The job takes several minutes. Enough time to empty another can.
"All right," he mutters. "Now climb inside. Right where I sit."
She starts up, then pauses. Looking back over her shoulder, she asks, "Why?" Again, he thinks about it. Then he stands and shuffles his way over to her, saying, "It's just this simple. These animals aren't worth anything alive. But my insurance'll pay if they die. In an accident."
She says nothing. Watching him.
"It's nothing but simple," he says. "Put that lever there over one notch, then push the pedal. The one that just came up out of the floor. And you'll start backing up, which means you've got to steer...with the wheel there...."
She can't speak, or think.
"I'll help you," he promises. "I'll tell you where you're going, where you need to get...okay, darling...?"
She finishes her climb and sits behind the wheel. But that's all. Sitting there is the only thing she can do now.
He tries to explain it again.
"If I'm the one driving," he says, "it looks wrong. You see? But if I came here to drink, and while I was doing that, you broke the driver and took the wheel...and made a little mistake while I was drinking...."
She can barely understand his slurring voice.
Again, he calls her, "Darling."
He's crying now. That's how much it means to him.
With a crying voice, he screams, "Will you, please?"
The engine has been left running. As ordered, she moves the lever one place and starts to put her foot on the pedal, and he takes a big step backward, telling her, "And shut your door. Go on. That's it!"
She's never felt so scared.
He takes a huge gulp of beer, then starts moving his hands, showing her what to do.
She turns the wheel, and the truck backs up and backs up, its trailer easing its way onto the concrete ramp. When the back tires hit the water, she feels it. A resistance starts to fight her, and in response, she pushes the pedal harder. Then comes the odd sense that the truck is being lifted behind her, as if some great soft hand wants to keep it level. And then, as the cold water starts to leak through the doors, filling the long dark trailer, the animals, in one great voice, start to scream.
Her man stands on top of the ramp, waving with both arms.
"Is this right?" she shouts.
"Keep. Backing. Lip!" he answers.
She realizes that she doesn't know how to drive any way but backward. He forgot to tell her that part. In confusion, she lifts her hands from the wheel and her foot from the pedal, asking, "How much more?"
He shouts his answer, but all she can hear are the animals.
In a great shared voice, they have begun to sing, voices roaring and her listening to them as the river carries the trailer downstream, dragging the cab after it.
Then all at once, she's singing too, trying her very best to follow the melody and wishing all the time that she knew their words, wishing that she just once had bothered to listen to these silly little songs of theirs....

MARKET DAY

MARKET DAY

"WAKE THEM NICE. BE NICE."
What am I doing wrong? she wonders.
Not one thing. That's what.
"Remember, it's early for them," says the man, turning on the last row of long lights. Then again, he tells her, "Be nice."
She loosens her grip on the broom, not coaxing them quite so hard. Plump sows and hard young boars grunt and push themselves up onto their feet and hands. Sleepy eyes blink. The blue-eyed sow with the freckled face gives her a different look. Angry, sort of. But there's something else, too. As if maybe it knows.
How could it?
It can't. It doesn't. And it won't ever, that's for sure.
"Keep them at this end," says the man. "I'll get the truck."
The broom is her broom. As much as these hands are hers. As soon as the man leaves, she swishes it harder, grunting defiantly, the animals knowing to keep away from her when she makes these kinds of noises.
Stupid animals.
The truck is huge, and loud in its own way. It pulls up to the building and stops with a big farting sound. Then the man comes around back and opens the truck's doors, and he says, "Here," while waving. "Help me with the ramp," he says.
The ramp is steel, and cold, and despite her help, heavy. It's still dark outdoors, the morning air cold enough for her breath to show in the lights. She smells herself while she works. She smells the man. He ate oatmeal and homegrown eggs for breakfast, and drank coffee and took a shit, and now he gives a big belch. From deep inside himself. "Let's get them onboard," he tells her. So she walks back into the building and grabs her broom again, urging the animals along by sweeping at the padded plastic floor. The floor is very clean. Because she uses soap and antibiotics on it, and she does her work so well. Cleanliness is important inside this building. For the sake of the animals, and more important, for the sake of the people who will buy them.
This is the day when they will be bought.
We're riding to the market today, she tells herself.
Grunting softly, she urges everyone to keep moving. A few of the animals shit and pee. Their messes don't matter now; nothing can be done about them now. One or two at a time, they ease their way onto the cold steel ramp, hands and feet acting afraid, not knowing the feel of the strange new surface.
Soft plastic is all they know.
The blue-eyed sow and the biggest boar are last on the ramp. The boar is strong enough to have worried her in the past, and now, shuffling into the truck, it seems to grow larger and more menacing.
"Watch that one," the man advises.
But she's already watching.
The boar turns its head just enough to look back at her, little brown eyes saying something. Warning her, she realizes. Almost too late, she braces herself. She lifts her broom and throws the plastic handle between them, and the boar turns around, rising up on its legs, grabbing at her with both of its thick little hands.
The man says, "Shit."
Says, "Jesus."
The boar has her by an arm and the broom handle. For a long moment, they shove at each other. But just as the boar doesn't know anything except walking on soft plastic, it doesn't know how to fight. She lets it push on her left side, and she lets herself crumble suddenly. The boar finds itself tumbling forward. Then she drives it over onto its back and grunts wildly and shows her teeth, its hands fighting for any grip, the broom handle snapping under the hard tugging.
A clean white rage takes her.
This was her broom. Since forever, it was. With the shattered handle, she beats the scared animal, slamming her weapon down against its exposed ribs and its soft brown flesh. Maybe six blows are delivered before the man takes the weapon from her hands, telling her, "Stop it! Now, stop it!"
The boar cowers beneath her, both hands trying to shield its tightly closed eyes. A little moan leaks from it, and something that almost sounds like words.
Like, "Please. No."
Which infuriates her even more. She kicks it once in the crotch, just missing the dangling balls, taking every satisfaction from its piercing wail.
The man strikes her with the broom handle.
On the head.
Twice.
Then she drops and sobs, and he throws his arms around her neck, his bristly face against her face, his scared soft sorry voice telling her, "I didn't. I shouldn't have. Please, forgive me...please...?"
Cold darkness turns into a cold bright morning.
Together they climb into the high cab of the truck. She's always thrilled to ride anywhere, but particularly when they take animals to market. The man is usually in a happy mood. That earlier episode is an exception, an aberration. If he doesn't smell happy and relaxed, she tells herself, that's only because he feels an aching guilt for striking her. Which is exactly how he should feel, of course.
As if remembering the custom, he puts on a smile.
He says, "Here we go," and tells the truck where they want to be.
The engine purrs, and they pull away from the long plastic building, passing the man's house and the steel barn, then the old wooden barn with its tilted walls and steeply slumping roof. For as long as she can remember, that barn has looked ready to collapse on itself. Yet there it stands, still. And that's the way all the world works. The man has told her so, on many occasions. Things only seem unstable and treacherous, but really, most everything likes to stay the same. He says. Only a fool or a coward believes that his life, in the end, won't work out for the best.
The man asks the truck for the weather, then the news.
She doesn't listen. Not to the voices coming from the dashboard or to the man's muttering little comments.
What she does is sit up straight, watching the countryside slide past. A week has passed since her last ride, and in that little while, spring has arrived. Blackish green shoots are punching their way up through the black plastic. The crops are laid out in perfect lines, each plant rooted in a buried conduit. Warm water and nutrients are carried to them. Each plant looks the same as its neighbors, but as the spring warms, each will be told what to grow and how to grow it. By summer, the fields will be tangled with jungles growing raw bread and blocks of fancy plastic and steaks in leather purses and seal fur and perfumes and thinking chips and anything else that someone somewhere in the world seems to want.
It's very complicated, knowing what to grow. Complicated and easy to be wrong, and that's why the smart people sold their land to the big companies, then put their cash into smaller, more profitable crops.
That's what the man taught her, long ago.
Almost too late, she looks back at her home, the steel barn shining in the new sunlight like a mirror. Or like a very hot, very still fire.
Then the little farm is swallowed up by the cold black fields.
She looks ahead, knowing this road perfectly. And the next road, too. Then they turn onto the highway, gaining speed until nobody can pass them, and their truck jumps sideways, fitting neatly between two other trucks.
Sometimes she hears the animals over the humming of the road.
They grunt or they cry out.
Once, for a strange long minute, the animals almost sound as if they're trying to sing together, an ugly little tune seeping through the walls of the cab.
Gradually, it occurs to her that she wouldn't normally hear anything, that the man should be filling the air with happy talk about the money coming and what they would do with it, in celebration. But he seems to have lost his voice. For a long while, he doesn't even mutter to himself, listening to the quiet voices who keep repeating the news. Those voices talk about places she doesn't know and people she can never meet, and what little she can pull from the words doesn't seem to concern them. She listens for "organs," but not even the church kind is mentioned. And then gradually, gradually, it occurs to her that the man isn't listening to anything. That he's just sitting behind the unused steering wheel, thinking hard about a thousand important things.
Because she wants to know, she asks, "What are you thinking?"
He gives her a funny look. But instead of answering, he says, "That's none of your business."
She drops her eyes, and waits.
Then talking more to himself than her, he says, "You've never asked that question before."
She lifts her eyes, trying to use them.
But he just looks away, sighing twice, then telling nobody in particular, "I don't know what I'm thinking. Anymore, I just don't."
HE HAS TOLD her this isn't a large city, but it's the only city she knows. She can't remember some of the buildings, which is usual enough. New homes and offices and helper quarters are always being built. But then again, she hasn't been here since last year, and not that much has changed. All things considered.
Like always, she remembers each turn that takes them to the market. She remembers the sleek buildings on both sides of the last busy road. What is new is the tall sign beside the final comer. What gets her attention are its swirling lights, bright even on this bright morning, and while she watches the lights, they make arms, and hands, then a body and legs, and finally, a strange squarish head.
"What's that?" she asks.
The man doesn't hear her. Maybe.
In the next moment, those pieces knit themselves together.
Words appear above the new person, and she sounds out each of them. "Who," she whispers. "Has the right," she adds, louder this time. "But God?" And feeling proud of herself, she asks, "What does that mean?"
"Huh?" says the man.
They've already driven passed the sign, so she repeats its message from memory. Then she asks, "What does 'right' mean?"
"It's a lot of things," he says
She doesn't think so. "And what's 'God' mean?"
"Nobody really knows," is his answer.
She doesn't know what to think. So instead of thinking, she watches them drive along the last road. The market building is large, but not as large as some. A sign out front has the market's fancy name, followed by the words, "The World's First Provider!" There's always been a tall gate out front. But the gate is closed this morning, which is different than every other time. Standing behind the black bars are both kinds of men. The new men are huge and strong, wearing thick gray uniforms. Her man says, "Wait," for no reason. Doesn't she know when to stay put?
The truck knows to stop short, then her man jumps down, walking toward the gate as he says something to the oldest men.
After a minute, the gate pulls open.
There aren't many cars resting next to the building, she notices. Which is different, too. Her man climbs back in, telling the truck to move and move slowly. She tilts her head and listens. But if the animals are singing, their voices are too soft to be heard.
A doctor in a long coat waits at the back door.
Because she knows him, and because she does this every time, she opens her door and jumps down, shouting, "Hello, Dr. Aarons!"
Nobody notices her.
"Glenn," says the doctor.
Her man says, "Cold enough?"
"Oh, sure."
Her man waits for a moment, then says, "I've got a full load."
The doctor's face is smoother than last time. And more tired.
"These are good ones," says her man.
"Well," the doctor says. "Let's have a look then."
Her man doesn't speak, or move. He just stands, hands hanging, acting as if he can't remember where he left his truck.
Dr. Aaron tums to her. "Would you help me?"
She's thrilled to be noticed. And of course she'll help. Working together, they extend the steel ramp, then walk up it, the doctor letting her open the first door. The animals stand back from the door, but not too far. Then her man is beside her. She hears him taking a few deep breaths. Then he says, "Back," to the animals. He says, "Be good," almost too softly to be heard.
The doctor pulls a wand from his long coat.
To warn the animals, the tip of the wand glows red. With his free hand, he opens the mesh door, stepping inside and waving the wand just once, a hard sharp crackling making everyone jump. The animals, and her, too.
Then her man talks. He says, "You know me, sir." He says, "I always deliver a good clean product."
The doctor doesn't say anything.
"Besides," says her man, "we've got a contract already."
With the wand, the doctor eases the blue-eyed sow to one side, holding her against the metal wall while a clean barb sticks her in a freckle, just once, taking a little sip of blood.
"A contract," her man repeats, talking to himself.
The wand does its work, and the doctor stands there, waiting.
"An honorable agreement," her man mutters. "With a set price."
The wand says something in its sharp little language, and the doctor nods and says, "You're right. She's clean." "Told you," her man says, hiding a belch with his hand.
The doctor moves to the next animal, taking a sip of blood and waiting again, the same machine words telling that this one, again, is in the very best of health.
A third animal is tested.
A fourth.
Then a fifth, and sixth, and so on.
She can't remember when the doctors tested all of them. A few sips are enough, since sicknesses and worms would have been shared among the animals. But Dr. Aarons keeps testing, and her man keeps muttering about the contract and what is fair and what is right. A lot of things are right, she nearly says. Has he forgotten?
In the back, waiting to be last, is the dangerous boar.
Her man turns silent, watching as the doctor pins the boar with the wand, then looks hard at its black-and-blue places.
"Oh, that," her man blurts. "It was an accident. The poor thing fell off the ramp this morning."
The doctor takes blood and says nothing.
"Bruises heal," her man says.
"They do," Dr. Aarons agrees. Then his wand makes a soft sound, a different sound, and he reads what has been found, stepping to the back end of the truck and folding up the wand, saying to her man, "I'm sorry --"
"It's a fucking bruise!" he blurts out.
"No," says the doctor. "I'm talking about the herpes."
"The what?"
"There's a new strain in some of the cultures," the doctor explains. "It's hard to detect, but I've got to assume that they all have it...which is why I've got no choice but to refuse this particular shipment...."
Her man says nothing.
What he does, if anything, is grow smaller. She can almost see it happening. He's standing on the tilted steel ramp, in the cold sunshine, and he dips his head and shrinks down and takes a few breaths, too small to make any difference. Then he gives a little moan and lifts his head, a whispering voice saying, "That's a goddamn lie. You were just hunting for any excuse --"
"Glenn," says the doctor.
He's talking from below now. From the concrete ground.
"Glenn," he says, sounding almost sad. Then a pair of new men step up beside him, and the doctor says, "Naturally, you can challenge my findings in court. If that's what you want to do, Glenn."
Her man shakes his little face, saying nothing.
"I am sorry. Believe me."
He sounds sorry, and sad, and helpless.
But when she looks at the doctor, he seems tall and strong. Nearly as strong as the new men standing beside him, waiting for orders. Their skin is this color, then that color. Whatever was cheapest on the day they were made. Their big hands hang at their sides, boar fingers and thumbs curled up into fists. And things worse than any wand ride inside their little leather holsters, waiting for any reason to be used.
THEY'RE DRIVING again. Toward home, she guesses.
She assumes that much can still happen. When her man makes an unexpected turn, she guesses that they're on their way to this court place. What's wrong will be made right again. Nothing important has changed. Only a fool or the most cowardly coward would think otherwise.
A tiny concrete building wears a drab little sign.
"Mel's," the sign tells the world. "Come in and refresh yourself."
The man orders the truck to pull off the road and park.
"What should I do?" she asks.
He doesn't seem to hear. But as he's climbing down, he says, "I don't care. Do whatever you want."
She wants to follow him.
Inside, the darkness is sudden and warm, and she can smell things that are strange, then familiar. Whenever her man leaves for the night, he comes home smelling this way. He comes home happy. So this must be a good happy place, she decides.
He climbs up on a stool, setting his elbows on a long high table, then says, "Beer," to nobody in particular.
A stranger stands behind the table. He brings the beer in a thick glass, stares at her man, then just walks away.
Most of the stools are empty. She sits next to her man. There's another empty stool beside her, so she puts her feet up on it to be comfortable. She wiggles her toes. A woman sits alone next to her wiggling toes. "Hello," she says to the woman.
The woman has scars, but they barely show in the darkness. Whoever built her face made it to look pretty. Was it the standing man who built her? She has freckles and blue eyes and a smile that comes easily.
"Hello to you," the smiling woman says. Then she points at her man, her finger long and painted. "Does he belong to you?"
"It's the other way around," she explains.
Isn't it obvious?
"Does your owner want to know me?"
She asks her man, "Do you want to know her?"
"Not now," he says to his beer.
"Not now," she repeats, glad to be his only friend.
But the woman keeps smiling in her special way, waiting for the man to look at her. And when he happens to glance in her direction, she says, "Watch." And with one hand, she reaches into her mouth, pulling out all of her teeth.
With a sloppy voice, the woman says, "Imagine."
The man breathes deeply. Twice. Then he looks at the standing man, telling him, "Not now. Get her off me."
The standing man wipes his hands against his apron, then tells the toothless woman, "Put them back in. And just sit there."
The woman does what she's told.
She wonders what could she do to look as pretty as that woman. But even with the same pretty eyes and the big smile, she realizes that she wouldn't be the same. Which bothers her somehow. Why does it bother her? She thinks about that for a long while. Long enough for the man to drink another beer. Then she wonders something else. She asks the pretty woman, "Why don't you get some real teeth?"
The woman looks at her. Looks and says nothing.
"Teeth that won't come loose," she advises. Then she gives her own a good hard tug, adding, "Like these. See?"
The woman shrugs and turns away, saying nothing.
Her man starts a third beer. She looks at him, then asks, "What are you thinking?"
His thinking machine is set out on the table, unfolded and showing him words. But he doesn't seem to be reading. The words are marching past, but his eyes are glassy and sad, and faraway. They almost look wet, and she wonders what sort of dirt got in them.
Again, she asks, "What are you thinking?"
"Don't ask me that again. Ever."
He says it quietly, but not softly. He says it so that she's left hurting, wondering what's wrong and what she could do to make things better.
But then, even after warning her, he says, "I'm just reading my policy."
"Policy?" she repeats. "What's that?"
"My insurance," he says.
"What's insurance?"
"It's another kind of game." He looks over at the standing man, then whispers, "Nothing. Forget it." He folds up his thinking machine and puts it in his pocket, then shouts, "Can I get a six-pack to go?"
The standing man looks at him, then says, "If you let your car drive."
"It's a truck," her man says.
"Can it drive itself?"
"Can it?" he asks her.
Right away, she says, "Yes, and it's very fast, too!"
"Then buy anything you want," says the standing man. "Is a six-pack going to be enough?"
"Sure," says her man, climbing off the stool and heading for the door.
She jumps down, following.
The pretty new woman stays on her seat, like she's suppose to. Is she pretty because she looks so young? That woman could be five hours old, or five years old. Or she might be a mixture of old pieces and other parts that are brand new.
If I could just get some new pieces for myself, she tells herself. Then she thinks about the blue-eyed sow waiting in the truck, and the steel barn where she was born, and her man touching her softly as he does that very careful, very important work, giving her the blue eyes and soft pink freckles, too.
Her man waits long enough for her to climb into the cab. Then the truck pulls out into traffic, and they're driving again. She didn't hear him tell the truck where, but they're moving back toward the market again.
"Did court help?" she asks.
He doesn't say anything. Then he sets aside an empty beer can and asks, "What do you mean? What court?"
"That place we were," she says. "Did it help us?"
He pulls his mouth into a funny shape as he says, "Yeah, it helped. But it's no court of law. Not even close."
Whatever the place was, things are better again.
That's what matters, she tells herself. All the way to the market, she smiles and feels good about everything. But then the truck doesn't slow down like it should. It forgets where they're going, rolling past the closed gate and the long building. With her face pressed to her window, she looks at the new men looking out through the tall bars. They're not watching her. They're watching a line of people standing on the very edge of the street, each one of them holding up a sign. All of them are old people, and their signs are brightly colored, and they're chanting in one voice, making no sense. But she sounds out what words she can see on their signs as the truck swiftly carries her past them.
"Wrong," she quotes.
"Evil," she manages.
"Frank," she mutters. Then, "Stein."
Her man opens another can of beer and drinks and says nothing. He doesn't seem at all concerned that they've missed the market.
"Wrong," she repeats. "What is it that's wrong?"
He drinks his beer and almost looks at her. Then he stops himself, breathes deeply and tells her, "When you don't do what I say."
"That's wrong," she admits.
"Remember that."
When has she forgotten that? But instead of saying it, she asks, "Why did we drive past the market?"
He breathes again. Even deeper this time.
"Was it those people?" she asks. "The ones with the signs?"
"Yeah," he says. "They're part of the problem."
For a little moment, she imagines having her broom again. It's repaired and in her hands again, and she's pushing those loud people away from the market, clearing them out of the way for their truck to pass.
"Overproduction," he says.
Those are two words, she realizes. But he said them as one.
"What's 'over-production'?" she asks.
"That's the other half of this big fucking nightmare," he says. Not explaining what he means. Instead he finishes his beer and sets the empty can under his legs, and he opens still another can, giving the foam a deep long slurp.
She looks outside again.
Little buildings stand up near the street. They remind her of the market building, only nobody waits behind their gates and there aren't any cars or trucks parked in front of them. "For Sale," says one sign. "No Something-Passing," say others. But she can't concentrate on her reading just now. Her mind keeps jumping around, and she can barely think about anything at all, it seems.
The street lifts, crossing a straight ridge of dirt and grass.
On the other side of the ridge are leafless trees and new green grass, and the street turns to gravel, winding its way through the trees. She almost asks where they are. But then he explains, "This is a park."
"It's very pretty here," she offers.
"I guess," he replies, his voice sloppy and slow.
There's water up ahead. Big dark water, and she slowly realizes that it's moving. Like piss down a chute, it slides along, and she takes a breath, then says, "This looks like a very nice place."
He doesn't say anything to her.
To the truck, he says, "Park. Anywhere."
The street ends with a wide area of gravel and muddy pools. He opens another beer and says, "Jump down and come around."
Now he's talking to her.
The outside air is cold and wet. A little wind blows over the river, and she hears the wind and hears the sound of water slooshing and twisting against itself and the muddy banks. A concrete ramp vanishes into the water. It looks like a street covered by a peaceful flood. But she can't marvel at the sight because she needs to come all the way around the truck.
"I'm drunk," he tells her.
His voice sounds wet and sad and clumsy.
"Help me down, would you?"
Gladly. She reaches up and grabs one hand and its arm, and she eases him down to where he can stand upright, propped against the truck.
"My other beers...give them to me..."
Not so gladly, she obeys him.
"Stay there."
It hurts, watching him stagger over to a nearby bench. But he manages to sit and open up another can of beer, and before he takes his first sip, he looks up and says, "Get the tool box. From behind the seat."
The tool box is heavy and clumsy. And loud when she sets it on the ground.
"There's a thick gray wire," he says. "Under that wheel there. Inside the cab, yeah. I want you to unfasten it."
She asks, "How?"
He seems to consider that simple question. Then he says, "With the pry bar. Just jerk it right off there...!"
The job takes several minutes. Enough time to empty another can.
"All right," he mutters. "Now climb inside. Right where I sit."
She starts up, then pauses. Looking back over her shoulder, she asks, "Why?" Again, he thinks about it. Then he stands and shuffles his way over to her, saying, "It's just this simple. These animals aren't worth anything alive. But my insurance'll pay if they die. In an accident."
She says nothing. Watching him.
"It's nothing but simple," he says. "Put that lever there over one notch, then push the pedal. The one that just came up out of the floor. And you'll start backing up, which means you've got to steer...with the wheel there...."
She can't speak, or think.
"I'll help you," he promises. "I'll tell you where you're going, where you need to get...okay, darling...?"
She finishes her climb and sits behind the wheel. But that's all. Sitting there is the only thing she can do now.
He tries to explain it again.
"If I'm the one driving," he says, "it looks wrong. You see? But if I came here to drink, and while I was doing that, you broke the driver and took the wheel...and made a little mistake while I was drinking...."
She can barely understand his slurring voice.
Again, he calls her, "Darling."
He's crying now. That's how much it means to him.
With a crying voice, he screams, "Will you, please?"
The engine has been left running. As ordered, she moves the lever one place and starts to put her foot on the pedal, and he takes a big step backward, telling her, "And shut your door. Go on. That's it!"
She's never felt so scared.
He takes a huge gulp of beer, then starts moving his hands, showing her what to do.
She turns the wheel, and the truck backs up and backs up, its trailer easing its way onto the concrete ramp. When the back tires hit the water, she feels it. A resistance starts to fight her, and in response, she pushes the pedal harder. Then comes the odd sense that the truck is being lifted behind her, as if some great soft hand wants to keep it level. And then, as the cold water starts to leak through the doors, filling the long dark trailer, the animals, in one great voice, start to scream.
Her man stands on top of the ramp, waving with both arms.
"Is this right?" she shouts.
"Keep. Backing. Lip!" he answers.
She realizes that she doesn't know how to drive any way but backward. He forgot to tell her that part. In confusion, she lifts her hands from the wheel and her foot from the pedal, asking, "How much more?"
He shouts his answer, but all she can hear are the animals.
In a great shared voice, they have begun to sing, voices roaring and her listening to them as the river carries the trailer downstream, dragging the cab after it.
Then all at once, she's singing too, trying her very best to follow the melody and wishing all the time that she knew their words, wishing that she just once had bothered to listen to these silly little songs of theirs....