"M. Rickert - Anyway" - читать интересную книгу автора (Rickert Mary)

unwise, but, I reason, at least it's not nuts. At least I'm not sitting here sucking on
stones. That would be nuts.

While I smoke, I consider the options, in theory. Send my son to war and bury the
stones? Did my father say under a full moon? I make a mental note to check that
and then, after a few more puffs, get out of bed and start rummaging in my purse
until I find my checkbook, with the pen tucked inside. I tear off a check and write on
the back of it, "Find out if stones have to be buried under full moon or not."
Satisfied, I crawl back into bed, being very careful with my lit cigarette.

There's a knock on my bedroom door. "Mom? Are you all right?"

"Just couldn't sleep."

"Can I come in?"

"Sure, honey."

Robbie opens the door and stands there, his brown curls in a shock of confusion on
his forehead, the way they get after he's been wearing a hat. He still has his jacket
on and exudes cool air. "Are you smoking?"

I don't find this something necessary to respond to. I take a puff. I mean, obviously
I am. I squint at him. "You know, people are dying over there."
"Mom."

"I'm just saying. I want to make sure you know what you're getting into. It's not
like you're home in the evenings watching the news. I just want to make sure you
know what's going on."

"I don't think you should smoke in bed. Jesus, Mom, it really stinks in here. I'm not
going to die over there, okay?"

"How do you know?"

"I just do."

"Don't be ridiculous. Nobody knows something like that."

"I have to go to bed, Mom. Don't fall asleep with that cigarette, okay?"

"I'm not a child. Robbie?"

"Yeah?"

"Would it be worth it to you?"

"What?"

"Well, your life? I mean, are you willing to give it up for this?"