"Mary Rickert - Don't ask" - читать интересную книгу автора (Rickert Mary)

lost boy, stolen from the end of his driveway, the wheels of his blue bicycle
still spinning when his mother went to the door to call him in for dinner and
saw the bike there but did not immediately comprehend it as a sign of
catastrophe. He was missing for eight years, and was a hero for a while,
until he started committing petty crimes in the neighborhood.

The famous lost boy, a man now, explains that he has been observing
our behavior and the behavior of our sons. We cannot help but feel
squeamish about the whole thing, we are uncomfortable with the notion that,
after everything that happened, we have been studied and observed and
did not know it. We discuss this in whispers in the high school auditorium,
where the famous lost boy has come to speak. The therapists have their
theories but we assume only one person has the truth and we are eager to
hear what he can tell us about all our suffering, because, we say, nodding
our heads and hugging ourselves in the cold auditorium, this happened to
all of us.

тАЬNo,тАЭ the famous lost boy (now a grown man with long, stringy hair)
says. тАЬIt didnтАЩt.тАЭ

We have been advised by therapists and counselors, experts beyond
the meager fourth grade education of the famous lost boy (by the time he
came back, he was too angry and unruly for school) not to ask what
happened. тАЬThey will tell you when they are ready,тАЭ the experts say.

We ask them if they want maple syrup for their pancakes, what show
theyтАЩd like to watch, what games theyтАЩd like to play. We spoil them and
expect them to revel in it, the way they did before they were taken, but
oddly, in spite of all theyтАЩve been through, and the horrors they have
endured, they behave as though our servitude and their eminence is a
given. Yet, sometimes we ask a question, so innocent, тАЬchocolate chip or
peanut butter?тАЭ which they respond to with confusion, frowning as if trying
to guess a right answer, or as though unfamiliar with the terms. Other times
they bark or growl like angry dogs being taunted, but it passes so quickly
we are sure itтАЩs been imagined.

****
 The famous lost boy wants us to give him our sons. тАЬYou can visit
whenever,тАЭ he says.

What is he, crazy? What does he think we are?

тАЬYou donтАЩt understand them. Nobody does. Except me.тАЭ

We are not sure if this is true. The part about him understanding them.
Perhaps. We know that we donтАЩt. The therapists say, тАЬGive it time. DonтАЩt
ask.тАЭ

We ask them if they want meatloaf or roast chicken and they stare at
us as if we have spoken Urdu. We show them photographs of the relatives