"Roberts, Nora - [Stanislaski 04] - Convincing Alex" - читать интересную книгу автора (Roberts Nora)The curvy blonde in hot-pink spandex
tottered on stiletto heels as she worked her corner. Her eyes,
heavily painted with a sunburst of colors, kept a sharp watch on her
associates, those spangled shadows of the night. There was a great
deal of laughter on the street. After all, it was springtime in New
York. But beneath the laughter there was a flat sheen of boredom that
no amount of glitter or sex could disguise. For these ladies, business was
business. After popping in some fresh gum, she
adjusted the large canvas bag on her bare shoulder. Thank God it was
warm, she thought. It would be hell to strut around half-dressed if
the weather was ugly. A gorgeous black woman in red leather
that barely covered the essentials languidly lit a cigarette and
cocked her hip. "Come on, baby," she said to no one in
particular, in a voice husky from the smoke she exhaled. "Wanna
have some fun?" Some did, Bess noted, her eyes skimming
the block. Some didn't. All in all, she thought,
business was pretty brisk on this spring night. She'd observed
several transactions, and the varied ways they were contracted. It
was too bad boredom was the byword here. Boredom, and a defiant kind
of hopelessness. "You talking to yourself, honey?" "Huh?" Bess blinked up into
the shrewd eyes of the black goddess in red leather who had strolled
over. "Was I?" "You're new?" Studying Bess,
she blew out smoke. "Who's your man?" "My… I don't have one." "Don't have one?" The woman
arched her ruthlessly plucked brows and sneered. "Girl, you
can't work this street without a man." "That's what I'm doing."
Since she didn't have a cigarette, Bess blew a bubble with her gum.
Then snapped it. "Bobby or Big Ed find out, they're
going to mess you up." She shrugged. After all, it wasn't her
problem. "Free country." "Girl, ain't nothing free."
With a laugh, she ran a hand down her slick, leather-covered hip.
"Nothing at all." She flicked her cigarette into the
street, where it bounced off the rear fender of a cab. There were dozens of questions on
Bess's lips. It was in her nature to ask them, but she remembered
that she had to go slow. "So who's your man?" "Bobby." With her lips
pursed, the woman skimmed her gaze up and down Bess. "He'd take
you on. A little skinny through the butt, but you'd do. You need
protection when you work the streets." And she could use the
extra money Bobby would pass her way if she brought him a new girl. "Nobody protected the two girls
who got murdered last month." The black woman's eyes flickered. Bess
considered her self an excellent judge of emotion, and she saw grief,
regret and sorrow before the eyes hardened again. "You a cop?" Bess's mouth fell open before she
laughed. That was a good one, she thought. Sort of flattering. "No,
I'm not a cop. I'm just trying to make a living. Did you know either
of them? The women who were killed?" "We don't like questions around
here." The woman tilted her head. "If you're trying to make
a living, let's see you do it." Bess felt a quick ripple of unease. Not
only was the woman gorgeous, she was big. Big and suspicious. Both
qualities were going to make it difficult for Bess to hang back on
the fringes and observe. But she considered herself an agile thinker
and a quick study. After all, she reminded herself, she'd come here
tonight to do business. "Sure." Turning, she strutted
slowly along the sidewalk. Her hips—and she didn't for a minute
believe that her butt was skinny—swayed seductively. Maybe her throat was a little dry.
Maybe her heart was pounding a bit too quickly. But Bess McNee took a
great deal of pride in her work. She spotted the two men half a block
away and licked her lips. The one on the left, the dark one, looked
very promising. "Look, rookie, the idea's to take
one, maybe two." Alex scanned the sidewalk ahead. Hookers,
drunks, junkies and those unfortunate enough to have to pass through
them to get home. "My snitch says that the tall black
one—Rosalie—knew both the victims." "So why don't we just pick her up
and take her in for questioning?" Judd Malloy was anxious for
action. His detective's shield was only forty-eight hours old. And he
was working with Alexi Stanislaski, a cop who had a reputation for
moving quickly and getting the job done. "Better yet, why don't
we go roust her pimp?" Rookies, Alex thought. Why were they
always teaming him up with rookies? "Because we want her
cooperation. We're going to pick her up, book her for solicitation.
Then we're going to talk to her, real nice, before Bobby can come
along and tell her to clam up." "If my wife finds out I spent the
night picking up hookers—" "A smart cop doesn't tell his
family anything they'd don't need to know. And they don't need to
know much." Alex's dark brown eyes were cool, very cool, as they
flicked over his new partner's face. "Stanislaski's rule number
one." He spotted the blonde. She was staring
at him. Alex stared back. Odd face, he thought. Sharp, sexy, despite
the makeup she'd troweled on. Beneath all the gunk, her eyes were a
vivid green. The face itself was all angles, some of them wrong. Her
nose was slightly crooked, as if it had been broken. Some John or
pimp, he figured, then skimmed his eyes down to her mouth. Full, overfull, and a glossy red. It
didn't please him at all that he felt a reaction to it. Not knowing
what she was, what she did. Her chin came to a slight point, and with
her prominent cheekbones it gave her face a triangular, foxlike look. The clinging tube top and spandex capri
pants showed every inch of her curvy, athletic little body. He'd
always been a sucker for the athletic type—but he reminded
himself just where this particular number got her exercise. In any case, she wasn't the one he was
looking for. Now or never, Bess told herself,
feeling her new acquaintance's eyes on her. "Hey, baby…" Though
she hadn't smoked since she'd been fifteen, her voice was husky.
Saying a prayer to whatever gods were listening, she veered in on
Alex. "Want to party?" "Maybe." He hooked a finger
in the top of her tube, and was surprised when she flinched. "You're
not quite what I had it mind, sweetie." "Oh?" What next? Combining
instinct with her observations, she tossed her head and leaned into
him. She had the quick impression of pressing against steel—hard,
unyielding and very cool. "Just what did you have in mind?" Then, for a moment, she had nothing at
all on hers. Not with the way those dark eyes cut into her, through
her. His knuckles were brushing her skin, just above the breasts. She
felt the heat from them, from him. As she continued to stare, she was
struck by a vivid image of the two of them, rolling on a narrow bed
in some dark room. And it had nothing to do with business. It was the first time Alex had ever
seen a hooker blush. It threw him off, made him want to apologize for
the fantasy that had just whipped through his brain. Then he
remembered himself. "Just a different type, babe." In her heels, they were eye-to-eye. It
made him want to rub off the powders and paints to see what was
beneath. "I can be a different type,"
Bess said, delighted with her inspired response. "Hey, girlfriend." Rosalie
strutted over and slipped a friendly arm around Bess's shoulders.
"You're not going to be greedy and take both of these boys, are
you?" "I—" Pay dirt, Alex thought, and shifted his
attention to Rosalie. "You two a team?" "We are tonight." She glanced
from Alex to his partner. "How 'bout you two?" Judd searched for his voice. He'd
rather have been facing a gunman in an alley. And he simply couldn't
put his hands on this big, beautiful woman, when a picture of his
wife's trusting face was flashing in his head like a neon light. "Sure." He let out a long
breath and tried to emulate some of Alex's cocky confidence. Rosalie threw back her head and laughed
before she stepped forward, bumping bodies with Judd. He gave way
instinctively as a dark red flush crept up his neck. "I believe
you're new at this, honey. Why don't you let Rosalie show you the
ropes?" Because his partner seemed to have
developed laryngitis, Alex took over. "How much?" "Well…" Rosalie didn't
bother to look over at Bess, who had gone dead pale. "Special
rate tonight. You get both of us for a hundred. That's the first
hour." She leaned down and whispered something in Judd's ear
that had him babbling. "After that," she continued, "we
can negotiate." "I don't—" Bess began,
then felt Rosalie's fingers dig into her bare shoulder like sharp
little knives. "I think that'll do it," Alex
said, and pulled out his badge. "Ladies, you're busted." Cops, Bess realized on a wave of sweet
relief. While Rosalie expressed her opinion with a single vicious
word, Bess struggled not to burst into wild laughter. Perfect, Bess thought as she was bumped
along into the squad room. She'd been arrested for solicitation, and
life couldn't be better. Trying to take everything in at once, she
grinned as she scanned the station house. She'd been in one before,
of course. As she always said, she took her work seriously. But not
in this precinct. Not downtown. It was dirty—grimy, really, she
decided, making mental notes and muttering to herself. Floors, walls,
the barred windows. Everything had a nice, picturesque coat of crud. It smelled, too. She took a deep breath
so that she wouldn't forget the ripe stench of human sweat, bitter
coffee and strong disinfectant. And it was noisy. With every nerve on
sensory alert, she separated the din into ringing phones, angry
curses, weeping, and the clickety-clack of keyboards at work. Man, oh, man, she thought. Her luck was
really in. "You're not a tourist,
sweetheart," Alex reminded her, adding a firm nudge. "Sorry." The vibrant excitement in her eyes was
so out of place that he stared. Then, with a shake of his head, he
jabbed a finger toward a chair. He was letting the rookie get his
feet wet getting the vitals from Rosalie. Once they had her booked,
he'd take over himself, using charm or threats or whatever seemed
most expedient to make her talk to him about her two murdered
associates. "Okay." He took his seat
behind his battered and overcrowded desk. "You know the drill." She'd been staring at a young man of
about twenty with a face full of bruises and a torn denim jacket.
"Excuse me?" Alex just sighed as he rolled a form
onto his typewriter. "Name?" "Oh, I'm Bess." She held out
her hand in a gesture so natural and friendly he nearly took it. Instead, he swore softly. "Bess
what?" "McNee. And you're?" "In charge. Date of birth." "Why?" His eyes flicked up, arrowed hers. "Why
what?" "Why do you want to know?" . Patience, never his strong suit,
strained. He tapped a finger on the form. "Because I've got this
space to fill." "Okay. I'm twenty-eight. A Gemini.
I was born on June the first." Alex did the math and typed in the
year. ''Residence." Natural curiosity had her poking
through the folders and papers on his desk until he slapped her hand.
"You're awfully tense," she commented. "Is it because
you work undercover?" Damn that smile, he thought. It was
sassy, sexy, and far from stupid. That, and those sharp, intelligent
green eyes, might have fooled him. But she looked like a hooker, and
she smelled like a hooker. Therefore… "Listen, doll, here's the way this
works. I ask the questions, you answer them." "Tough, cynical, street-smart." One dark brow lifted. "Excuse me?" "Just a quick personality check.
You want my address, right?" she rattled off an address that
made both of Alex's brows raise. "Let's get serious." "Okay." Willing to oblige,
Bess folded her hands on the edge of his desk. "Your address," he repeated. "I just gave it to you." "I know what real estate goes for
in that area. Maybe you're good." Thoughtful, he scanned her
attributes one more time. "Maybe you're better than you look.
But you don't make enough working the streets to pop for that kind of
rent." Bess knew an insult when it hit her
over the head. What made it worse was that she'd spent over an hour
on her makeup. And she happened to know that her body was good. Lord
knew, she sweated to keep it that way by working out three days a
week. "That's where I live, cop." Her temper, which had a
habit of flaring quickly, had her upending her enormous canvas tote
onto his desk. Alex watched, fascinated, as she pawed
through the pile of contents. There were enough cosmetics to supply a
small department store. And they weren't the cheap kind. Six
lipsticks, two compacts, several mascara sticks and pots of eye
shadow. A rainbow of eyeliner pencils. Scattered with them were two
sets of keys, a snowfall of credit-card receipts, rubber bands, paper
clips, twelve pens—he counted—a few broken pencils, a
steno pad, two paperback books, matches, a leather address book
embossed with the initials ELM, a stapler—he didn't even pause
to wonder why she would carry one—tissues and crumpled papers,
a tiny micro-cassette recorder. And a gun. He whipped it out of the pile and
stared at it. A water gun. "Careful with that," she
warned as she found her overburdened wallet. "It's full of
ammonia." "Ammonia?" "I used to carry Mace, but this
works fine. Here." Pleased with herself, she pushed the open
wallet under his nose. It might have been her in the picture.
The hair was short and curly and chic, a deep chestnut rather than a
brassy blonde. But that nose, that chin. And those eyes. He frowned
over the driver's license. The address was right. "You got a car?" She shrugged and began to dump things
back into her purse. "So?" "Women in your position usually
don't." Because it made sense, Bess stalled.
"I've got a license. Everybody who has a license doesn't have to
have a car, do they?" "No." He jerked the wallet
out of her reach. "Take off the wig." Pouting a little, she patted it. "How
come?" He reached across the desk and yanked
it off himself. She scowled at him while she ran her fingers through
short, springy red curls. "I want that back. It's borrowed." "Sure." He tossed it onto his
desk before he leaned back in his squeaky chair for a fresh
evaluation. If this lady was a hooker, he was Clark Kent. "What
the hell are you?" It was time to come clean. She knew it.
But something about him egged her on. "I'm just a woman trying
to make a living, Officer." That was how Jade would handle it,
Bess was sure. And since Jade was her creation, Bess was determined
to do right by her. He opened the wallet, skimmed through
the bills. She was carrying around what would be for him more than
two weeks' pay. "Right." "Can you do that?" she
demanded, more curious than annoyed. "Go through my personal
property?" "Honey, right now you are my
personal property." There were pictures in the wallet, as well.
Snapshots of people, some with her, some without her. And the lady
was a card-carrying member of dozens of groups, including Greenpeace,
the World Wildlife Federation, Amnesty International and the Writers'
Guild. The last brought him back to the tape recorder. When he picked
up the little toy, he noted that it was running. "Let's have it,
Bess." God, he was cute. The thought passed
through her head as she smiled at him. "Have what?" "What were you doing hanging
around with Rosalie and the rest of the girls?" "My job." When his eyes
narrowed that way, Bess thought, he was downright irresistible.
Impatient, a little mean, with a flash of recklessness just barely
under control. Fabulous. "Really." All honesty and
cheap perfume, she leaned forward. "You see, it all has to do
with Jade, and how she's having this problem with a dual personality.
By day, she's a dedicated lawyer—a real straight arrow, you
know—but by night she hits the streets. She's blocking what
happened between her and Brock, and coupled with a childhood memory
that's begun to resurface, the strain's been too much for her. She's
on a path of self-destruction." The frown in his eyes turned them
nearly black. "Who the hell is Jade?" "Jade Sullivan Carstairs. Don't
you watch daytime TV?" His head was beginning to buzz. "No." "You don't know what you're
missing. You'd probably really enjoy the Jade-Storm-Brock story line.
Storm's a cop, you see, and he's falling in love with Jade. Her
emotional problems, and the hold Brock has on her, complicate things.
Then there was a miscarriage, and the kidnapping. Naturally, Storm
has problems of his own." "Naturally. What's your point?" "Oh, sorry. I get offtrack. I
write for 'Secret Sins' Daytime drama." "You're a soap-opera writer?" "Yeah." Unlike many in the
trade, she wasn't bothered by that particular label. "And I like
to get the feel of the situations I put my characters into. Since
Jade is a special pet of mine, I—" "Are you out of your mind?"
Alex barked the question as he leaned over into her face. "Do
you have any idea what you were doing?" She blinked, at once innocent and
amused. "Research?" He swore again, and Bess found she
liked the way he raked impatient fingers through his thick black
hair. "Lady, just how far were you intending to take your
research?" "How—? Oh." Her eyes
brightened with laughter. "Well no, not quite that far." "What the hell would you have done
if I hadn't been a cop?" "I'd have thought of something."
She continued to smile. He had a fascinating face—golden skin,
dark eyes, wonderful bones. And that mouth, so beautifully sculpted,
even if it did tend to scowl. "It's my job to think of things.
And when I spotted you, I thought you looked safe. What I mean is,
you didn't strike me as the kind of man who'd be interested in…"
What was a delicate way of putting it? she wondered. "Paying for
pleasure." He was so angry he wanted to yank her
up and toss her over his lap. The idea of administering a few good
whacks to that cute little butt was tremendously appealing. "And
if you'd guessed wrong?" "I didn't," she pointed out.
"For a minute there, I was worried, but it all worked out.
Better than I expected, really, because I had a chance to ride in
a—Do you still call them paddy wagons?" He'd been so sure he'd seen everything.
Heard everything. With his temper straining at the bit, he spoke
through clenched teeth. "Two hookers are dead. Two who worked
that area.'' "I know," she said quickly,
as if that explained it all. "That was one of the reasons I
chose it. You see, I plan to have Jade—" "I'm talking about you," he
interrupted in a voice that had her wincing. "You. Some
bubbleheaded hack writer who thinks she can strut around in spandex
and a half a ton of makeup, then go home to her nice neighborhood and
wash it all off." "Hack?" It was the only thing
she took offense to. "Look, cop—" "You look. You stay out of my
territory, and out of those slut clothes. Do your research out of a
book." Her chin shot out. "I can go where
I want, wearing what I want." "You think so?" There was a
way to teach her a lesson. A perfect way. "Fine." He rose,
tugged the tote out of her hands, then took a firm grip on her arm.
"Let's go." "Where?" "To holding, babe. You're under
arrest, remember?" She stumbled in the three-inch heels
and squawked, "But I just explained—" "I hear better stories before
breakfast every day." "You're not going to put me in a
cell." Bess was sure of it. Positive. Right up until the moment
the bars closed in her face. It took about ten minutes for the shock
to wear off. When it did, Bess decided it wasn't such a bad turn. She
could be furious with the cop—whoever he was—but she
could appreciate and take advantage of the unique opportunity he'd
given her. She was in a holding cell with several other women. There
was atmosphere to be absorbed, and there were interviews to be
conducted. When one of her cellmates informed her
that she was entitled to a phone call, she demanded one. Pleased with
the progress she was making, she settled back on her hard cot to talk
to her new acquaintances. It was thirty minutes later when she
looked up and spotted her friend and cowriter Lori Banes, standing
beside a uniformed policeman. "Bess, you look so natural here." With a grin, Bess popped up as the
guard unlocked the door. "It's been great." "Hey!" one of her cellmates
called out. "I'm telling you that Vicki's a witch, and Jeffrey
should boot her out. Amelia's the right woman for him." Bess sent back a wink. "I'll see
what I can do. 'Bye, girls." Lori didn't consider herself
long-suffering. She didn't consider herself a prude or a stuffed
shirt. And she said as much to Bess as they walked through the
corridors, up the stairs and back into the lobby area outside the
squad room. "But," she added, pressing fingers to her tired
eyes. "There's something that puts me off about being woken up
at 2:00 a.m. to come bail you out of jail." "Sorry, but it's been great. Wait
until I tell you." "Do you know what you look like,
dear?" "Yep." Unconcerned, Bess
craned her neck. The chair behind Alex's desk was empty. "I had
no idea that so many of the working girls watched the show. But they
do work nights, mostly. Uh, excuse me…" She caught the
sleeve of one of New York's finest as he walked by. "The officer
who uses that desk?" The cop swallowed the best part of a
bite of his pastrami sandwich. "Stanislaski?" "Whew. That's a mouthful. Is he
still around?" "He's in Interrogation." "Oh. Thanks." "Come on, Bess, we've got to pick
up your things." Bess had signed for her purse and its
contents, still keeping an eye out for Alex. "Stanislaski,"
she repeated to herself. "Is that Polish, do you think?" "How the hell do I know?" Out
of patience, Lori steered her toward the door. "Let's get out of
here. The place is lousy with criminals." "I know. It's fabulous." With
a laugh, she tucked an arm around Lori's waist. "I got ideas for
the next three years. If we decide to have Elana arrested for Reed's
murder…" "I don't know about having Reed
murdered." With a sigh, Bess looked around for a
cab. "Lori, we both know Jim isn't going to sign another
contract. He wants to try the big leagues. Having his character offed
is the perfect way to beef up Elana's story line." "Maybe." Bess slyly pulled out her ace. "'Our
Lives, Our Loves' picked up two points in the ratings last month." Lori only grunted. "Word is Dr. Amanda Jamison is
going to have twins." "Twins?" Lori shut her eyes.
Soap diva Ariel Kirkwood, who played the long-suffering psychiatrist
on the competing soap, was daytime's most popular star. "It had
to be twins," Lori muttered. "Okay, Reed dies." Bess allowed herself one quick-victory
smile, then hurried on. "Anyway, while I was in there, I
was picturing the elegant, cool Dr. Elana Warfield Stafford Carstairs
in prison. Fabulous, Lori. It'd be fabulous. I wish you'd seen the
cop." They'd walked to the corner, and there
wasn't a cab in sight. "What cop?" "The one who arrested me. He was
incredibly sexy." Lori only had the energy to sigh.
"Leave it to you to get busted by a sexy cop." "Really. All this thick black
hair. His eyes were nearly black, too. Very intense. He had all those
hollows and planes in his face, and this beautiful mouth. Nice build,
too. Sort of rough-and-ready. Like a boxer, maybe." "Don't start, Bess." "I'm not. I can find a man sexy
and attractive without falling in love." Lori shot her a look. "Since
when?" "Since the last time. I've sworn
off, remember?" Her smile perked up when she spotted a cab
heading their way. "I'm interested in this Stanislaski for
strictly professional reasons." "Right." Resigned, Lori
climbed in when the cab swung to the curb. "I swear." She lifted her
right hand to add impact to the oath. "We want to get into
Storm's head more, into his background and stuff. So I pick this
cop's brain a little." She gave a cabbie both her address and
Lori's. "After Jade gets attacked by the Millbrook Maniac, Storm
isn't going to be able to hold back his feelings for her. More has to
come out about who and what he is. If we do have Elana arrested for
Reed's murder, that's going to complicate his life—you know,
family loyalty versus professional ethics. And once he confronts
Brock—" "Hey." At a red light, the
cabbie turned, peering at them from under his fading Mets cap. "You
talking about 'Secret Sins'?" "Yeah." Bess brightened. "Do
you watch it?" "The wife tapes it every day. You
don't look familiar." "We're not on it," Bess
explained. "We write it." "Gotcha." Satisfied, he
punched the accelerator when the light changed. "Let me tell you
what I think about that two-timing Vicki." As he proceeded to do just that, Bess
leaned forward, debating with him. Lori closed her eyes and tried to
catch up on lost sleep.
Chapter 2
Contents - Prev/Next "My wife went nuts." Judd
Malloy munched on his cherry Danish while Alex swung in and out of
downtown traffic. "She's a big fan of that soap, you know? Tapes
it every day when she's in school." "Terrific." Alex had been
doing his best to forget his little encounter with the soap queen,
but his partner wasn't cooperating. "Holly figures it was just like
meeting a celebrity." "You don't find many celebrities
turning tricks." "Come on, Alex." Judd washed
down the Danish with heavily sugared coffee. "She wasn't,
really. You said so yourself, or the charges wouldn't have been
dropped." "She was stupid," Alex said
between his teeth. "Carrying a damn water pistol in that
suitcase of hers. I guess she figured if a John got rough, she'd blat
him between the eyes and that would be that." Judd started to comment on how it might
feel to get a blat of ammonia in the eyes, but didn't think his
partner wanted to hear it. "Well, Holly was impressed, and we
got some fresh juice out of Rosalie, so we didn't waste our time." "Malloy, you'd better get used to
wasting time. Stanislaski's rule number four." Alex spotted the
building he was looking for and double-parked. He was already out of
the car and across" the sidewalk before Judd found the NYPD sign
and stuck it in the window. "We sure as hell could be wasting it
here with this Domingo." "Rosalie said—" "Rosalie said what we wanted to
hear so we'd spring her," Alex told him. His cop's eyes were
already studying the building, noting windows, fire escapes, roof.
"Maybe she gave us the straight shot on Domingo, and maybe she
pulled it out of a hat. We'll see." The place was in good repair. No
graffiti, no broken glass or debris. Lower-middle-income, Alex
surmised. Established families, mostly blue-collar. He pulled open
the heavy entrance door, then scanned the names above the line of
mailboxes. "J. Domingo. 212." Alex
pushed the buzzer for 110, waited, then hit 305. The answering buzz
released the inner door. "People are so careless," he
commented. He could feel Judd's nerves shimmering as they climbed the
stairs, but he could tell he was holding it together. He'd damn well
better hold it together, Alex thought as he gestured Judd into
position, then knocked on the door of 212. He knocked a second time
before he heard the cursing answer. When the door opened a crack, Alex
braced his body against it to keep it that way. "How's it going,
Jesus?" "What the hell do you want?" He fit Rosalie's description, Alex
noted. Right down to the natty Clark Gable moustache and the gold
incisor. "Conversation, Jesus. Just a little conversation." "I don't talk to nobody at this
hour." When he tried to shove the door to,
Alex merely leaned on it and flipped open his badge. "You don't
want to be rude, do you? Why don't you ask us in?" Swearing in Spanish, Jesus Domingo
cracked the door a little wider. "You got a warrant?" "I can get one, if you want more
than conversation. I can take you down for questioning, get the
paperwork and do the job before your shyster lawyer can tap-dance you
out. Want a team of badges in here, Jesus?" "I haven't done nothing." He
stepped back from the door, a small man with wiry muscles who was
wearing nothing but a pair of gym shorts. "Nobody said you did. Did I say he
did, Malloy?" Enjoying himself, Judd stepped in
behind Alex. "Nope." The building might be
lower-middle-class, but Domingo's apartment was a small high-tech
palace. State-of-the-art stereo equipment, Alex noted. A big-screen
TV with some very classy video toys. The wall of tapes ran mostly to
the X-rated. "Nice place," Alex commented.
"You sure know how to make your unemployment check stretch." "I got a good head for figures."
Domingo plucked up a pack of cigarettes from a table, lighted one.
"So?" "So, let's talk about Angie
Horowitz." Domingo blew out smoke and scratched at
the hair on his chest. "Never heard of her." "Funny, we got word you were one
of her regulars, and her main supplier." "You got the wrong word." "Maybe you don't recognize the
name." Alex reached into his inside jacket pocket, and his
fingers brushed over his leather shoulder harness as he pulled out a
manila envelope. "Why don't you take a look?" He stuck the
police shot under Domingo's nose and watched his olive complexion go
a sickly gray. "Look familiar?" "Man." Domingo's fingers
shook as he brought his cigarette to his lips. "Problem?" Alex glanced down
at the photo himself. There hadn't been much left of Angie for the
camera. "Oh, hey, sorry about that, Jesus. Malloy, didn't I tell
you not to put the dead shot in?" Judd shrugged, feigning casualness. He
was thinking he was glad he didn't have to look at it again himself.
"Guess I made a mistake." "Yeah." All the while he
spoke, Alex held the photo where Domingo could see it. "Guy's a
rookie," he explained. "Always screwing up. You know. Poor
little Angie sure got sliced, didn't she? Coroner said the guy put
about forty holes in her. You can see most of them. Poor Malloy here
took one look and lost his breakfast. I keep telling him not to eat
those damned greasy Danishes before we go check out a stiff, but like
I said…" Alex grinned to himself as Domingo made a dash
for the bathroom. "That was cold, Stanislaski,"
Judd said, grinning. "Yeah, I'm that kind of guy." "And I didn't throw up my
breakfast." "You wanted to." The sounds
coming from the bathroom were as unpleasant as they get. Alex tapped
on the door. "Hey, Jesus, you okay, man? I'm really sorry about
that." He passed the photo and envelope to Judd. "Tell you
what, let me get you some nice cold water, okay?" The answer was a muffled retch that
Alex figured anyone could take for assent. He moved into the kitchen
and opened the freezer. The two kilos were exactly where Rosalie had
said he'd find them. He took one out just as Domingo rushed in. "You got no warrant. You got no
right." "I was getting you some ice."
Alex turned the frozen cocaine over in his hands. "This doesn't
look like a TV dinner to me. What do you think, Malloy?" By leaning a shoulder against the door
jamb, Judd blocked the doorway. "Not the kind my mother used to
make." "You son of a bitch." Domingo
wiped his mouth with a clenched fist. "You violated my civil
rights. I'll be out before you can blink." "Could be." Taking an
evidence bag out of his pocket, Alex slipped both kilos inside.
"Malloy, why don't you read our friend his rights while he's
getting dressed? And, Jesus, try some mouthwash." "Stanislaski," the desk
sergeant called out when Alex came up from seeing Domingo into a
cell. "You got company." Alex glanced over toward his desk,
seeing that several cops were huddled around it. There was quite a
bit of laughter overriding the usual squad room noise. Curiosity had
him moving forward even before he saw the legs. Legs he recognized.
They were crossed at the knee and covered almost modestly in a
canary-yellow skirt. He recognized the rest of her, too,
though the tough little body was clad in a multihued striped blazer
and a scoop-necked blouse the same color as the skirt. Half a dozen
slim columns of gold danced at her ears as she laughed. She looked
better, sexier, he was forced to admit, with her mouth unpainted, her
freckles showing, and those big green eyes subtly smudged with color.
Her hair was artfully tousled, a rich, deep red that made him think
of a mahogany statue his brother had carved for him. "So I told the mayor we'd try to
work it in, and we'd love for him to come on the show and do a
cameo." She shifted on the desk and spotted Alex. He was
frowning at her, his thumbs tucked into the pockets of a leather
bomber jacket. "Officer Stanislaski." "McNee." He inclined his
head, then swept his gaze over his fellow officers. "The boss
comes in and finds you here, I might have to tell him how you didn't
have enough work and volunteered to take some of mine." "Just entertaining your guest,
Stanislaski." But the use of the squad room's nickname for their
captain had the men drifting reluctantly away. "What can I do for you?" "Well, I—" "You're sitting on a homicide,"
he told her. "Oh." She scooted off the
desk. Without the stilettos, she was half a head shorter than he.
Alex discovered he preferred it that way. "Sorry. I came by to
thank you for straightening things out for me." "That's what they pay me for.
Straightening things out." He'd been certain she would rave a
bit about being tossed into a cell, but she was smiling, friendly as
a kindergarten teacher. Though he couldn't recall ever having a
teacher who looked like her. Or smelled like her. "Regardless, I appreciate it. My
producer's very tolerant, but if it had gone much further, she would
have been annoyed." "Annoyed?" Alex repeated. He
stripped off his jacket and tossed it onto his chair. "She'd
have been annoyed to find out that one of her writers was out
soliciting Johns down at Twenty-third and Eleventh Avenue." "Researching," Bess
corrected, unoffended. "Darla—that's my producer—she
gets these headaches. I gave her a whopper when I went on a job with
a cat burglar." "With a…" He let his
words trail off and eased down on the spot on the desk she'd just
vacated. "I don't think you want to tell me about that." "Actually, he was a former cat
burglar. Fascinating guy. I just had him show me how he'd break into
my apartment." She frowned a little, remembering. "I guess
he was a little rusty. The alarm—" "Don't." Alex held up a hand.
He was beginning to feel a headache coming on himself. "That's old news, anyway."
She waved it away with a cheerful gesture of her hands. "Do you
have a first name, or do I just call you Officer?" "It's Detective." "Your first name is Detective?" "No, my rank." He let out a
sigh. "Alex." "Alex. That's nice." She ran
a fingertip over the strap of his harness. She wasn't being
provocative; she wanted to know what it felt like. Once she knew him
better, she was sure, she'd talk him into letting her try it on.
"Well, Alex, I was wondering if you'd let me use you." He'd been a cop for more than five
years, and until this moment he hadn't thought anything could
surprise him. But it took him three seconds to close his mouth. "I
beg your pardon?" "It's just that you're so
perfect." She stepped closer. She really wanted to get a better
look at his weapon—without being obvious about it. She smelled like sunshine and sex. As
he drew it in, Alex thought that combination would baffle any man.
"I'm perfect?" "Absolutely." She looked
straight into his eyes and smiled. Her gaze was frank and assessing.
She was studying him, the way a woman might study a dress in a
showroom window. "You're exactly what I've been looking for." Her eyes were pure green. No hint of
gray or blue, no flecks of gold. There was a small dimple near her
mouth. Only one. Nothing about that odd, sexy face was balanced.
"What you're looking for?" "I know you're busy, but I'd try
not to take up too much of your time. An hour now and then." "An hour?" He caught himself
echoing her, and shook himself loose. "Listen, I appreciate—" "You're not married, are you?" "Married? No, but—" "That makes it simpler. It just
came to me last night when I was getting into bed.'" God. He'd learned to appreciate women
early. And he'd learned to juggle them skillfully—if he said so
himself. He knew how to dodge, when to evade and when to sit back and
enjoy. But with this one, all bets were off. "Is this heavy?" she asked,
fiddling with his harness. "You get used to it. It's just
there." Her smile warmed, making him think of
sunlight again. "Perfect," she murmured. "I'd be
willing to compensate you for your time, and your expertise." "You'd be—" He wasn't
certain if he was insulted or embarrassed. "Hold on, babe." "Just think about it," Bess
said quickly. "I know it's a lot to ask, but I have this problem
with Matthew." A brand-new emotion snuck in under his
guard, and it was as green as her eyes. "Matthew? Who the hell
is Matthew?" "We call him Storm, actually.
Lieutenant Storm Warfield, Millbrook PD." Now he definitely had a headache. Alex
rubbed his fingers against his temple. "Millbrook?" "The fictional town of Millbrook,
where the show's set. It's supposed to be somewhere in the Midwest.
Storm's a cop. Personally, his life's a mess, but professionally,
he's focused and intense and occasionally ruthless. In this new story
line I'm working on, I want to concentrate on his police work, the
routine, the frustrations." "Wait." He'd always been
quick, but it was taking him a minute to change gears. "You want
me to help you with a story line?" "Exactly. If you could just tell
me how you think, how you go about solving a case, working with the
system or around it. TV cops have to work around the system quite a
bit, you know. It plays better than by-the-book." He swore under his breath and rubbed
his hands over his face. Damn it, his palms were sweaty. "You're
a real case, McNee." "You don't have to decide right
now." She was also persistent. And she wondered if he had a
spare gun strapped to his calf. One of those sexy-looking little
chrome jobs. She'd seen that ploy in several movies. Still, she
thought if she asked him that, she'd lose her edge. "I'm having
a thing tonight." As she spoke, she dug into her huge bag for
her notebook. "Eight o'clock until whenever. Bring a friend, if
you like. Your partner, too. He seemed very sweet." "He's adorable." : "Yeah." She ripped off the
page and handed it to him. "I'd really like you to stop by." He took the sheet, not bothering to
remind her he already had her address. "Why?" "Why not?" She beamed at him
again. Before he could list the reasons, he
heard his name called. "Alexi." Alexi. Bess was already enchanted with
the sound as she rolled the name over in her head. Different, exotic.
Sexy. She was certain it suited him much more than the casual Alex. Bess studied the woman bearing down on
them. This wasn't one who'd be lost in a crowd, she mused. She was
stunning, totally self-assured and very pregnant. Beside Bess, Alex
pushed off the desk and sighed. "Rachel." "A moment of your time,
Detective," Rachel said, flipping a glance over Bess before
pinning Alex with a tawny stare. "To reacquaint you with civil
rights." "Your sister?" Bess surmised,
beaming at both of them. Alex sent her a considering frown. "How
did you know that?" "I'm really good with faces. Same
bone structure, same coloring, same mouth. You have to be brother and
sister, or first cousins." "Guilty," Rachel admitted.
Though she would have liked to know what Alex was doing with the
sharp-eyed redhead, she wasn't about to be swayed from her duties as
a public defender. "Jesus Domingo, Alexi. Illegal search and
seizure." "Bull." Alex crossed his arms
and leaned back against the desk. "You had a search warrant?" "Didn't need one. He invited us
in." "And invited you to poke through
his belongings, I suppose." "Nope." Alex grinned while
Bess watched them bounce the verbal ball as though they were champion
tennis players. "Jesus got sick. I offered to get him some
water. He didn't object. I opened the freezer to get the poor guy
some ice, and there it was. Two kilos. It'll all be in my report." "That's lame, Alexi. You'll never
get a conviction." "Maybe. Maybe not. Talk to the
DA." "I intend to." Rachel shifted
her briefcase and began to rub her belly in circular motions to
soothe the baby, who seemed to be doing aerobics in her womb. "You
had no probable cause." "Sit down." "I don't want to sit down." "The baby does." He yanked
over a chair and all but shoved her into it. "When are you going
to knock this off?" It did feel better to sit.
Indescribably better. But she wasn't about to admit it. "The
baby's not due for two months. I have plenty of time. We were
discussing…" "Rach." He laid a hand on her
cheek, very gently. A shouted curse wouldn't have stopped her, but
the small gesture did. "Don't make me worry about you.'' "I'm perfectly fine." "You shouldn't be here." "I'm having a baby. It's not
contagious. Now, about Domingo." Alex gave a brief, pithy opinion on
what could be done with Domingo. "Talk to the DA," he
repeated. "Sitting down." "She looks pretty strong to me,"
Bess commented. Two pair of eyes turned to her, one furious, the
other thoughtful. "Thank you. The men in my life are
coddlers," Rachel explained. "Sweet, but annoying." "Muldoon should take better care
of you," Alex insisted: "I don't need Zack to take care of
me. And the fact is, between him and Nick, I'm barely allowed to
brush my own teeth." She held out a hand to Bess. "Since my
brother is too rude to introduce me, I'm Rachel Muldoon." "Bess McNec. You're a lawyer?" "That's right. I work for the
public defender's office." "Really?" Bess's thoughts
began to perk. "What's it like to—" Alex held up a hand. "Don't get
her started. She'll pick your brain clean before you know she's had
her fingers in it. Look, McNee—" he turned to Bess,
determined not to be charmed by her easy smile "—we're a
little busy here." "Of course you are. I'm sorry."
Obligingly she swung her huge purse onto her shoulder. "We'll
talk tonight. Nice to meet you, Rachel." "Same here." Rachel ran her
tongue over her teeth, and both she and Alex watched Bess weave her
way out of the squad room. "Well, that was rude." "It's the only way to handle her.
Believe me." "Hmm… She seems like an
interesting woman. How did you meet her?" "Don't ask." He sat back down
on his desk, irked that the scent of sunshine and sex still lingered
in the air. "I can't believe we're doing
this." Holly, Judd's pretty wife of eight months, was all but
hopping out of her party shoes. "Wait until I tell everyone in
the teachers' lounge where I spent the evening." "Take it easy, honey." Judd
tugged at the tie she'd insisted he wear. "It's just a party." "Just a party?" As the
elevator rode up, she fussed with her honey-brown hair. "I don't
know about you two, but it isn't every day I get to eat canape's with
celebrities." Ominously silent, Alex stayed hunched
in his leather jacket. He didn't know what the hell he was doing
here. His first mistake had been mentioning the invitation to Judd.
No matter how insouciant Judd pretended to be, he'd been bursting at
the seams when he called his wife. Alex had been swept along in their
enthusiasm. But he wasn't going to stay. Holly's
sense of decorum might have insisted that she and Judd couldn't
attend without him, but he'd already decided just how he'd play it.
He'd go in, maybe have a beer and a couple of crackers. Then he'd
slip out again. He'd be damned if he'd spend this rare free evening
playing soap-opera groupie. "Oh, my" was all Holly could
say when the elevator doors opened. The walls of the private foyer were
splashed with a mural of the city. Times Square, Rockefeller Center,
Harlem, Little Italy, Broadway. People seemed to be rushing along the
walls, just as they did the streets below. It was as if the woman who
lived here didn't want to miss one moment of the action. The wide door to the main apartment was
open, and music, laughter and conversation were pouring out, along
with the scents of hot food and burning candles. "Oh, my," Holly said again,
dragging her husband along as she stepped inside. From behind them, Alex scanned the
room. It was huge, and it was packed with people. Draped in silk or
cotton, clad in business suits and lush gowns, they stood elbow to
elbow on the hardwood floor, lounged hip to hip on the sapphire
cushions of the enormous circular conversation pit, sat knee to knee
on the steps of a bronze circular staircase that led to an open loft
where still more people leaned against a railing decked with naked
cherubs. Two huge windows let the lights of the
city in. More partygoers sat on the pillow-plumped window seats,
balancing plates and glasses on their laps. Paintings were scattered over the
ivory-toned walls. Vivid, frenetic modern art, mind-bending
surrealism. There was enough color to make his head swim. Yet,
through the crowd and the clashing tones, he saw her. Dancing
seductively with a distinguished-looking man in a gray pinstriped
suit. She wore an excuse for a dress, the
color of crushed purple grapes. He wondered, irritated, if she owned
anything that covered those legs. This number certainly didn't. Nor
did it cover much territory at all, the way it dipped to the waist in
the back, skimmed above mid-thigh and left her shoulders bare, but
for skinny, glittery straps. Multihued gemstones fell in a rope from
her earlobes to those nicely sloped shoulders. Her feet were bare. She looked, Alex thought as his stomach
muscles twisted themselves into nasty knots, outrageously alluring. "Oh, Lord, there's Jade. Oh, and
Storm and Vicki. Dr. Carstairs, too." Holly's fingers dug into
her husband's arm. "It's Amelia." "Who?" "'Secret Sins,' dummy." She
gave Judd a playful punch. "The whole cast's here." "That's not all." Because he
remembered in time he was supposed to be jaded, Judd stopped himself
from pointing and inclined his head. "That's Lawrence D. Strater
dancing with our hostess. The L. D. Strater, of Strater Industries.
The Fortune 500's darling. The mayor's over in that corner, talking
with Hannah Loy, the grand old lady of Broadway." His excitement
began to hum in his voice as he continued to scan the room. "Man,
there are enough luminaries in this room to light every borough in
New York." But Alex hadn't noticed. Furthermore,
he didn't give a damn. His attention was focused on Bess. She'd
stopped dancing, and had leaned up to whisper something in her
partner's ear that made him laugh before he kissed her. Smack on the
lips. She kissed him back, too, her hands
lightly intimate at his waist, before she turned and spotted the new
arrivals. She waved, made her excuses, then scooted and dodged her
way through the crowd toward them. "You made it." She gave both
Alex and Judd a friendly peck on the cheek before holding out both
hands to Holly. "Nice to meet you." "My wife, Holly, this is Bess
McNee." "Thanks for asking us." Holly
caught herself starting to stutter, as she had the first time she
faced a classroom of ten-year-olds. She flushed. "My pleasure." Bess gave her
hands a reassuring squeeze. "Let's get you something to eat and
drink." She gestured toward a long table by the wall. Instead of
the useless finger food and fancy, unrecognizable dishes Alex had
expected, it was laden with big pots of spaghetti, mountains of
garlic bread, and generous trays of antipasti. "It's Italian night," she
explained, grabbing a plate and heaping it high. "There's plenty
of wine and beer, and a full bar." She handed the plate to Holly
and began to dish up another. "The desserts are on the other
side of the room. They're unbelievable." As she passed Judd a
plate, she noted the gleam in Holly's eyes. "Would you like to
meet some of the cast?" "Oh, I…" The hell with
sophistication. "Yes. I'd love it." "Great. Excuse us. Help yourself,
Alexi." "This is really something,"
Judd said over a mouthful of spaghetti. "Something," Alex agreed.
Deciding to make the best of it, he fixed himself a plate. He wasn't going to stay. But the food
was great. In any case, he didn't have anything else to do. It didn't
hurt to hang around and rub elbows with the fast and famous while he
was helping himself to a good hot meal. It certainly made a change
from his daily routine of wading through misery and bitterness. After washing down spaghetti with some
good red wine, he found himself a spot on a window seat where he
could sit back and watch the show. Bess dropped down beside him, clinked
her glass against his. "Best seat in the house." "Some house." "Yeah, I like it. I'll show you
the rest later, if you want." She broke off a tiny piece of the
pastry on his plate and sampled it. "Great stuff." "Yeah. You got a little…
here." Before his good sense could take over, he rubbed a bit of
the rich cream from her lip. Watching her, he licked it from the pad
of his thumb. And tasted her. "It's not bad." For a moment she wondered if the
circuits in her brain had crossed. Something certainly had sent out a
spark. She managed a small sound of agreement as she flicked her
tongue to the corner of her mouth. And tasted him. "Your, ah, partner's wife. Holly."
Small talk, any talk, had 'always come easily to her. She wasn't sure
why she was laboring now. "What about her?" "Who? Oh, right. Holly. She's
nice. I can't imagine what it would be like to teach fifth-graders." "I'm sure you'll ask her." "I already did." At ease
again, she smiled at him. Something about that sarcastic edge to his
voice made her relax and enjoy. "Come on, Alexi. We may be in
different professions, but both of them require a certain amount of
curiosity about human nature. Aren't you sitting here right now
wondering about all of these people, and what they're doing at my
party?" "Not as much as I'm wondering what
I'm doing at your party." He swirled the wine in his glass
before sipping. When he drank, his eyes stayed on hers. Watchful. She liked that. She liked that very
much, the way he could sit so still, energy humming from every pore,
while he watched. While he waited. Bess was willing to admit that one
of her biggest failings was being unable to wait for anything. "You were curious," she told
him. "Some." Her skirt hitched up another inch when
she curled her legs up on the seat. "I'd be happy to tell you
whatever you want to know, in exchange for your help. You see that
guy over there, the gorgeous one with the blonde hanging on his
biceps?" Alex scanned, homed in. "Yeah. I
wouldn't say he was gorgeous." "You're not a woman. That's my
detective, Storm Warfield, the black sheep of the snooty,
disgustingly rich Warfield clan, the rebel, the volatile brother of
the long-suffering Elana Warfield Stafford Carstairs. He's recently
pulled himself out of the destructive affair with the wicked, wily
Vicki. The blonde crawling up his chest. They're an item off-camera,
but on, Storm is madly in love with the tragedy-prone and ethereal
Jade, who is, of course, torn between her feelings for him and her
misplaced loyalty to the maniacally clever and dastardly Brock
Carstairs—half brother to Elana's stalwart husband Dr. Maxwell
Carstairs. Max was once married to Jade's formerly conniving but now
repentant sister, Flame, who was killed in a Peruvian earthquake soon
after the birth of her son—who may or may not be her husband's
child. Naturally, the body was never recovered." "Either I've had too much wine, or
you're making me dizzy." Bess smiled and gave him a
companionable pat on the thigh that sent his blood pressure soaring.
"It's really not that complicated, once you know the players.
But I want you for Storm." Alex sent the actor a considering look.
"I don't think he's my type." "Your professional expertise,
Detective. I need an informal technical advisor. My producer'd be
happy to compensate you for your time—particularly since we've
been number one in the ratings for the past nine months."
Someone called her name, and Bess sent a quick wave. "Looks like
it's going to start to thin out. Listen, can you hang around until
I've finished playing hostess?" She popped up and was gone before he
could answer. After a moment, Alex set the rest of the dessert aside
and rose. If he was going to see the party through, he might as well
enjoy himself. As she saw to the rest of her guests,
Bess kept an eye on him. Once he decided to relax, she noted, he made
the most of it. It didn't surprise her that he knew how to flirt, or
that several women in the room made a point of wandering in his
direction. Not even Lori—no pushover in the men department—was
unaffected. "So, that's the one who busted
you?" Lori asked her, popping a plump olive into her mouth. "What do you think?" Lori chewed, savored, swallowed.
"Yum-yum." With a laugh, Bess chose a wedge of
cheese. "I assume that's a comment on the man, not my buffet." "You bet. And the best part is,
he's not an actor." "Still sore?" Bess murmured. Lori shrugged, but her gaze cut over to
Steven Marshall, alias Brock Carstairs. "I never give him, or
his weenie little brain, a'thought. No sensible woman would spend her
life competing with an actor's ego for attention." "Sense has nothing to do with it." Lori looked away, because it hurt, more
than she could bear to admit, to watch Steven while he was so busy
ignoring her. "This from the queen of the bungled
relationships." "I don't bungle them, I enjoy
them." "I hasten to remind you that two
of your former fiance's are in this room." "It's a big party. Besides, I
wasn't engaged to Lawrence." "He gave you a ring with a
rock-the size of a Buick." "A token of his esteem," Bess
said blithely. "I never agreed to marry him. And Charlie and I…"
She waved to Charles Stutman, esteemed playwright. "We were only
engaged for a few months. We both agreed Gabrielle was perfect for
him and parted the closest of friends." "It was the first time I'd heard
of a woman being best man at her former fiancees wedding," Lori
admitted. "I don't know how you do it. You don't angst over men,
and they never toss blame your way when things fall apart." "Because I end up being a pal."
Bess's lips curved. For the briefest of moments, there was something
wistful in the smile. "Not always a position a woman craves, but
it seems to suit me." "Going to be pals with the cop?" Once again Bess found herself searching
the remaining guests for Alex. She found him, dancing slow and close
with a sultry brunette. "It would help if he'd bring himself to
like me a little. I think it's going to take some work." "I've never known you to fail.
I've got to go. See you Monday." "Okay." Bess was astute
enough to glance over in Steven's direction as Lori left. She was
also clear-sighted enough to see the expression of misery in his eyes
as he watched Lori walk to the elevator. People were much too hard on
themselves, she thought with a sigh. Love, she was certain, was a
complicated and painful process only if you wanted it to be. And she
should know, she mused as she took another sip of wine. She had
slipped painlessly in and out of love for years. As she set the glass aside, Alex caught
her eye. There was a quick, surprising tremor around her heart. But
it was gone quickly as someone swept her up into a dance.
Chapter 3
Contents - Prev/Next "How often do you have one of
these things?" Alex asked when he took Bess up on her offer of a
last cup of cappuccino in her now empty and horribly cluttered
apartment. "Oh, when the mood strikes."
The after-party wreckage didn't concern her. She and the cleaning
team she'd hired would shovel it out sooner or later. Besides, she
enjoyed this—the mess and debris, the spilled wine, the
lingering scents. It was a testament to the fact that she, and a good
many others, had enjoyed themselves. "Want some cold spaghetti?"
she asked him. "No." "I do." She unfolded herself
from the corner section of the pit and wandered over to the buffet.
"I didn't get a chance to eat much earlier—just what I
could steal off other people's plates." She came back to stretch
out on the cushions and twine pasta on her fork. "What did you
think of Bonnie?" "Who?" "Bonnie. The brunette you were
dancing with. The one who stuck her phone number in your pocket." Remembering, Alex patted his shirt
pocket. "Right. Bonnie. Very nice." "Mmm…she is." As she
agreed, Bess twined more pasta. She propped her feet on the coffee
table, where they continued to keep the beat of the low-volume rock
playing on the stereo. "I appreciate your staying." "I've got some time." "I still appreciate it. Let me run
this by you, okay?" She continued to eat, rapidly working her
way through a large plate full of food. "Jade's got a split
personality due to an early-childhood trauma, which I won't go into." "Thank God." "Don't be snide—millions of
viewers are panting for more. Anyway, Jade's alter ego, Josie, is the
hooker—or will be, once we start taping that story line.
Storm's nuts about Jade. It's difficult for him, as he's a very
passionate sort of guy, and she's fragile at the moment." "Because of Brock." "You catch on. Anyway, he's wildly
in love and miserably frustrated, and he's got a hot case to solve.
The Millbrook Maniac." "The—" Alex shut his
eyes. "Oh, man." "Hey, the press is always giving
psychotics catchy little labels. Anyway, the Maniac's going around
strangling women with a pink silk scarf. It's symbolic, but we won't
get into that right now, either." "I can't tell you how grateful I
am." She offered him a forkful of cold
pasta. After a moment, he gave in and leaned closer to take it. "Now,
the press is going to start hounding Storm," Bess continued.
"And the brass will be on his case, too. His emotional life is a
wreck. How does he separate it? How does he go about establishing a
connection between the three—so far—victims? And when he
realizes Jade may be in danger, how does he keep his personal
feelings from clouding his professional judgement?" ''That's the kind of stuff you want?" "For a start." "Okay." He propped his feet
beside hers. "First, you don't separate, not like you mean. The
minute you have to think like a cop, that's what you are, that's how
you think, and you've got no personal life until you can stop
thinking like a cop again." "Wait." Bess shoved the plate
into his lap, then bounded up and hunted through a drawer until she
came up with a notebook. She dropped onto the sofa again, curling up
her legs this time, so that her knee lay against the side of his
thigh. "Okay," she said, scribbling. "You're telling
me that when you start on a case, or get a call or whatever,
everything else just clicks off." Since she seemed to be through eating,
he set the plate on the coffee table. "It better click off." "How?" He shook his head. "There is no
how. It just is. Look, cop work is mostly monotonous. It's routine,
but it's the kind of routine you have to keep focused on. Make a
mistake in the paperwork, and some slime gets bounced on a
technicality." "What about when you're on the
street?" "That's a routine, too, and you'd
better keep your head on that routine, if you want to go home in one
piece. You can't starting thinking about the fight you had with your
woman, or the bills you can't pay, or the fact that your mother's
sick. You think about now, right now, or you won't be able to fix any
of those things later. You'll just be dead." Her eyes flashed up to his. He said it
so matter-of-factly. When she studied him, she saw that he thought of
it that way. "What about fear?" "You usually have about ten
seconds to be afraid. So you take them." "But what if the fear's for
someone else? Someone you love?" "Then you'd better put it aside
and do what you've been trained to do. If you don't, you're no good
to yourself or your partner, and you're a liability." "So, it's cut-and-dried?" He smiled a little. "Except on TV.
You're asking me for feelings, McNee, intangibles." "A cop's feelings," she told
him. "I'd think they would be very tangible. Maybe a cop
wouldn't be allowed to show his emotions on the job. An occasional
flare-up, maybe, but then you'd have to suck it in and follow
routine. And no matter how good you are, an arrest isn't always going
to stick. The bad guy isn't always going to pay. That has to cause
immeasurable frustration. And repressing that frustration…"
Considering, she tapped her pencil against the pad. "See, I
think of people as pressure cookers." "Sure you do." "No, really." That quick
smile, the flash of the single dimple. "Whatever's inside, good
or bad, has to have some means of release, or the lids blows."
She shifted again, and her fingers nearly brushed his neck. She
talked with them, he'd noted. With her hands, her eyes, her whole
body. The woman simply didn't know how to be still. "What do you
use to keep the lid on, Alexi?" "I make sure I kick a couple of
small dogs every morning." She smiled with entirely too much
understanding. "Too personal? Okay, we'll come back to it
later." "It's not personal." Damn it,
she made him uncomfortable. As if he had an itch in the small of his
back that he couldn't quite scratch. "I use the gym. Beat the
crap out of a punching bag a few days a week. Lift too many weights.
Sweat it out." "That's great. Perfect."
Grinning now, she cupped a hand over his biceps and squeezed. "Not
too shabby. I guess it works." She flexed her own arm, inviting
him to test the muscle. It was the gesture of a small boy on a
playground, but Alex couldn't quite think of her that way. "I
work out myself," she told him. "I'm addicted to it. But I
can't seem to develop any upper-body strength." He watched her eyes as he curled a hand
over her arm and found a tough little muscle. "Your upper body
looks fine." "A compliment." Surprised
that a reaction had leapt straight into her gut at the casual touch,
she started to move her arm. He held on. It took some work to keep
her smile from faltering. "What? You want to arm-wrestle,
Detective?" Her skin was like rose petals—smooth,
fragrant. Experimenting, he skimmed his hand down to the curve of her
elbow. She was smiling, he noted, and her eyes were lit with humor,
but her pulse was racing. "A few years back I arm-wrestled my
brother for his wife. I lost." The idea was just absurd enough to
catch her imagination. "Really? Is that how the Stanislaskis win
their women?" "Whatever works." Because he
was tempted to explore more of that silky, exposed skin, he rose. He
reminded himself that the uncomplicated Bonnie was more his style
than the overinquisitive, oddly packaged Bess McNee. "I have to
go." Whatever had been humming between them
was fading now. As Bess walked him to the door, she debated with
herself whether she wanted to let those echoes fade or pump up the
volume until she recognized the tune. "Stanislaski. Is that
Polish, Russian, what?" "We're Ukrainian." "Ukrainian?" Intrigued, she
watched him pull his jacket on. "From the southwest of the
European Soviet Union, with the Carpathian Mountains in the west." "Yeah." And through those
mountains his family had escaped when he was no more than a baby. He
felt a tug, a small one, as he often did when he thought of the
country of his blood. "You've been there?" "Only in spirit." Smiling,
she straightened his jacket for him. "I minored in geography in
college. I like reading about exotic places." She kept her hands
on the front of his jacket, enjoying the feel of leather, the scent
of it, and of him. Their bodies were close, more casual than
intimate, but close. Looking into his eyes, those dark, uncannily
focused eyes, she discovered she wanted to hear that tune again after
all. "Are you going to talk to me
again?" she asked him. His fingers itched to roam along that
tantalizingly bare skin on her back. For reasons he couldn't have
named, he kept his hands at his side. "You know where to find
me. If I've got the time and the answers, we'll talk." "Thanks." Her lips curved as
she rose on her toes so that their eyes and mouths were level. She
leaned in slowly, an inch, then two, to touch her mouth to his. The
kiss was soft and breezy. Either of his sisters might have said
goodbye to him in precisely the same manner. But that cool and
fleeting taste of her didn't make him feel brotherly. She heard the humming in her head. A
nice, quiet sound of easy pleasure. He tasted faintly of wine and
spices, and his firm lips seemed to accept the gesture as it was
meant—as one of affection and curiosity. Her lips were still
curved when she dropped back on her heels. "Good night, Alexi." He nodded. He was fairly sure he could
speak, but there was no point in taking the chance. Turning, he
walked into the foyer and punched the elevator button. When he
glanced back, she was still standing in the doorway. Smiling, she
waved another goodbye and started to close the door. It surprised them both when he whirled
around and slapped a hand on it to keep it open. The fact that she
took an automatic step in retreat surprised her further. But it was
the look in his eyes, she thought, that made her feel like a rabbit
caught in a rifle's cross hairs. "Did you forget something?" "Yeah." Very slowly, very
deliberately, he slid his arms around her waist, ran his hand up her
back, so that her eyes widened and her skin shivered. "I forgot
I like to make my own moves." Bess braced for the kind of wild
assault that was in his eyes, and was surprised for the third time in
as many minutes. He didn't swoop or crush, but eased her closer,
degree by degree, until she was molded to him. His fingers cruised
lazily up her back until they reached the nape of her neck, where
they cupped and held. Still his mouth hovered above her. His hand moved low, intimately, where
skin gave way to silk. "Stand on your toes," he murmured. "What?" "Stand on your toes." This
time, it was his lips that curved. Dazed, she obeyed, then gave a
strangled gasp when he increased the pressure on her back and pressed
them center to center. His eyes stayed open as he moved his mouth to
hers, brushing, nipping, then taking, in a dreamy kind of possession
that had her own vision blurring. The humming in her brain increased
until it was a wall of sound, unrecognizable. She was deaf to
everything else, even her own throaty moan as he dipped his tongue
between her lips to seduce hers. It was all slow-motion and soft-focus,
but that didn't stop the heat from building. She could feel the
little flames start to flare where she was pressed most intimately
against him, then spread long, patient fingers of fire outward.
Everywhere. He never pushed, he never pressured, he
savored, as a man might who had enjoyed a satisfying meal and was
content to linger over a tasty dessert. Even knowing she was being
sampled, tested, lazily consumed, she couldn't protest. For the first
time in her life, Bess understood what it was to be helplessly
seduced. He hadn't meant to do this. He'd been
thinking about doing just this for hours. However much pleasure it
gave him to feel her curvy body melt against his, to hear those
small, vulnerable sounds vibrating in her throat, to taste that dizzy
passion on her lips, he knew he'd made a mistake. She wasn't his
type. And he was going to want more. The instinct he'd been born with and
then honed during his years on the force helped him to hold back that
part of himself that, if let loose, could turn the evening into a
disaster for both of them. Still, he lingered another moment, taking
himself to the edge. When his system was churning with her, and his
mind was clouded with visions of peeling her out of that swatch of a
dress, he stepped back. He supported her by the elbows until her eyes
fluttered open. They were big and dazed. He clenched
his teeth to fight back the urge to pull her to him again and finish
what he'd started. But, however stunned and fragile she looked at the
moment, Alex recognized a dangerous woman. He'd been a cop long
enough to know when to face danger, and when to avoid it. "You, ah…" Where was
all her glib repartee? Bess wondered. It was a little difficult to
think when she wasn't sure her head was still on her shoulders.
"Well," she managed, and settled for that. "Well." He let her go and
added a cocky grin before he walked back to the elevator. Though his
stance was relaxed, he was praying the elevator would come quickly,
before he lost it and crawled back to her door. She was still there
when the elevator rumbled open. Alex let out a quiet, relieved breath
as he stepped inside and leaned against the back wall. "See you
around, McNee," he said as the doors slid shut. "Yeah." She stared at the
mural-covered walls. "See you around." "Holly hasn't been able to stop
talking about that party." Judd was scarfing down a blueberry
muffin as Alex cruised Broadway. "It made her queen of the
teachers' lounge." "I bet." Alex didn't want to
think about Bess's party. He especially didn't want to think about
what would be after the party. Work was what he needed to concentrate
on, and right now work meant following up on the few slim leads
they'd hassled out of Domingo. "If Domingo's given it to us
straight, Angie Horowitz was excited about a new John." Alex
tapped his fingers against the steering wheel. "He'd hired her
two Wednesdays running, dressed good, tipped big." Judd nodded as he brushed muffin crumbs
from his shirt. "And she was killed on a Wednesday. So was Rita
Shaw. It's still pretty thin, Alex." "So we make it thick." It
continued to frustrate him that they'd wasted time interrogating the
desk clerks at the two fleabag hotels where the bodies had been
found. Like most in their profession, the clerks had seen nothing.
Heard nothing. Knew nothing. As for the ladies who worked the
streets, however nervous they were, they weren't ready to trust a
badge. "Tomorrow's Wednesday," Judd
said helpfully. "I know what the hell tomorrow is.
Do you do anything but eat?" Judd unwrapped another muffin. "I
got low blood sugar. If we're going to go back and look at the crime
scene again, I need energy." "What you need is—"
Alex broke off as he glanced past Judd's profile and into the glaring
lights of an all-night diner. He knew only one person with hair that
shade of red. He began to swear, slowly, steadily, as he searched for
a parking place. "You really write for TV?"
Rosalie asked. Bess finished emptying a third
container of nondairy product into her coffee. "That's right." "I didn't think you were a
sister." Interested as much in Bess as in the fifty dollars
she'd been paid, Rosalie blew out smoke rings. "And you want to
know what it's like to turn tricks." "I want to know whatever you're
comfortable telling me." Bess shoved her untouched coffee aside
and leaned forward. "I'm not sitting in judgment or asking for
confidences, Rosalie. I'd like your story, if you want to tell it. Or
we can stick with generalities." "You figure you can find out
what's going on on the streets by putting on spandex and a wig, like
you did the other night?" "I found out a lot," Bess
said with a smile. "I found out it's tough to stand in heels on
concrete for hours at a time. That a woman has to lose her sense of
self in order to do business. That you don't look at the faces. The
faces don't matter—the money does. And what you do isn't a
matter of intimacy, not even a matter of sex—for you—but
a matter of control." She scooted her coffee back and took a
sip. "Am I close?" For a moment, Rosalie said nothing.
"You're not as stupid as you look." "Thanks. I'm always surprising
people that way. Especially men." "Yeah." For the first time,
Rosalie smiled. Beneath the hard-edged cosmetics and the lines life
had etched in her face, she was a striking woman, not yet thirty.
"I'll tell you this, girlfriend, the men who pay me see a body.
They don't see a mind. But I got a mind, and I got a plan. I've been
on the streets five years. I ain't going to be on them five more." "What are you going to do? What do
you want to do?" "When I get enough saved up, I'm
going South. Going to get me a trailer in Florida, and a straight
job. Maybe selling clothes. I look real fine in good clothes."
She crushed out her cigarette and lit another. "Lots of us have
plans, but don't make it. I will. I'm clean," she said, and
lifted her arms, turning them over. It took Bess a minute to realize
Rosalie was saying she wasn't a user. "One more year, I'm gone.
Less than that, if I hook on to a regular John with money. Angie
did." "Angie?" Bess flipped through
her mental file. "Angie Horowitz? Isn't that the woman who was
murdered?" "Yeah." Rosalie moistened her
lips before sucking in smoke. "She wasn't careful. I'm always
careful." "How can you be careful?" "You keep yourself ready,"
Rosalie told her. "Angie, she liked to drink. She'd talk a John
into buying a bottle. That's not being careful. And this guy, the
rich one? He—" "What the hell do you think you're
doing?" Both Rosalie and Bess looked up.
Standing beside the scarred table was a tall man with thin shoulders.
There was a cheroot clamped between his teeth, and a diamond winked
on his finger. His face was moon-pale, with furious blue eyes. His
hair was nearly as white, and slicked back, ending in a short
ponytail. "I'm having me a cup of coffee and
a smoke, Bobby," Rosalie told him. But beneath the defiance,
Bess recognized the trickle of fear. "You get back on the street where
you belong." "Excuse me." Bess offered her
best smile. "Bobby, is it?" He cast his icy blue eyes on her. "You
looking for work, sweetheart? I'll tell you right now, I don't
tolerate any loafing." "Thank you, but no, I'm not
looking. Rosalie was just helping me with a small problem." "She doesn't solve anyone's
problems but mine." He jerked his head toward the street. "Move
it." Bess slid out of the booth but held her
ground. "This is a public place, and we're having a
conversation." "You don't talk to anybody I don't
tell you to talk to." Bobby gave Rosalie a hard shove toward the
door. Bess didn't think, simply reacted. If
she detested anything, it was a bully. "Now just a damn minute."
She grabbed his sleeve. He rounded on her. Other patrons put on their
blinders when he pushed her into the table. Bess came up, fists
clenched, just as Alex slammed through the door. "One move, Bobby," he said
tightly. "Just one move toward her." Bobby brushed at his sleeve and
shrugged. "I just came in for a cup of coffee. Isn't that right,
Rosalie?" "Yeah." Rosalie closed her
hand over the business card Bess had slipped her. "We were just
having some coffee." But Alex's eyes were all for Bess. She
didn't look pale and frightened. Her eyes were snapping, and her
cheeks were flushed with fury. "Tell me you want to press
charges." "I'm sorry." With an effort,
Bess relaxed her hands. "We were just having a conversation.
Nice talking to you, Rosalie." "Sure." She swaggered out,
blowing smoke in Alex's face for effect. "Take off." Bobby moved his shoulders again,
smirked. "The coffee's lousy here, anyway." He flicked a
glance at Bess. "Next time, sweetheart." Alex waited ten humming seconds after
the door swung shut. Without a word, he stalked over to Bess and
grabbed her by the arm and hustled her out the door. "Look, if this is a
knight-in-shining-armor routine, I appreciate it, but I don't need
rescuing." "You need a straitjacket." With murder in his heart, he dragged
her half a block. "In the car," he snapped,
opening the back door of the patrol car. "A cab would be—" He swore, put a hand on her head and
shoved her into the back seat. Resigned, Bess settled back. "Hi,
Judd," she said as he took his place in the passenger seat in
front. "How's Holly?" "Great, thanks." He slanted a
look toward his partner. "Ah, she really had a good time at your
place." "I'm glad. We'll have to do it
again." Alex whipped out into traffic with enough force to have
her slamming back against the seat. Without missing a beat, Bess
crossed her legs. "Am I allowed to ask where we're going, or is
this another bust?" "I should be taking you to
Bellevue, where you belong," Alex responded. "But I'm
taking you home." "Well, thanks for the lift." His eyes flashed to hers in the
rearview mirror. Her face was still flushed, and her irises were a
sharp enough jade to slice to the bone, but she looked more miffed
than upset. Miffed, he thought with a snort. Stupid word. It fit her
perfectly. "You're an idiot, McNee. And, like
most idiots, you're dangerous." "Oh, really?" She scooted up
in the seat so that she could lean between him and Judd. "Just
how do you figure that, smart guy?" "Not only do you go back down to
an area you have no business even knowing about—" "Give me a break." "But," he continued, "you
sit there drinking coffee with a hooker, then pick a fight with her
pimp. The kind of guy who'd as soon give a woman a black eye as wish
her good-morning." Bess poked a finger at his shoulder. "I
didn't pick a fight with anyone, and if I had, it would be my
business." "That's why you're an idiot." "Hey, Alex, ease off." "Keep out of this," Alex and
Bess snarled in unison. "I'm not even here," Judd
mumbled, scooting down in his seat. "It so happens I was conducting an
interview." Bess folded her arms on the seat so that she
wouldn't give in to the nasty urge to twist Alex's ear. "In a
public place," she added. "And you had no right to come
bursting in and ruining everything before I'd finished." "If I hadn't come bursting in,
babe, you'd have had your nose broken again." She scowled, wrinkling her undeniably
crooked nose. "I can defend my nose, and anything else, just
fine." "Yeah, anyone can see you're a
regular amazon. Ow!" He slapped at her hand and swore the air
blue when she gave in and twisted his ear. "The minute I get you
out of this car, I'm going to—" "Uh, Alex?" "I told you to keep out of it." "I'm out," Judd assured him.
"But you might want to take a look at the liquor store coming up
at nine o'clock." Still steaming, Alex did, then let out
a heavy sigh. "Perfect. This makes it perfect. Call it in." Bess watched, wide-eyed, as Judd
radioed in an armed robbery in progress, gave their location and
requested backup. Before she could shut her gaping mouth, Alex was
swinging to the curb. "You," he said, stabbing a
finger in her face. "Stay in the car, or I swear I'll wring your
neck." "I'm not going anywhere,"
Bess assured him after she managed to swallow the large ball of fear
lodged in her throat. But before the words were out, he and Judd were
out of the car and drawing their weapons. He'd already forgotten her, she
realized as she stared at his profile. Before he and Judd had crossed
the street, he'd put on his cop's mind and his cop's face. She'd seen
hundreds of actors try to emulate that particular look. Some came
close, she realized, but this was the real thing. It wasn't grim or
fierce, but flat, almost blank. Except for the eyes, she thought with a
quick shudder. She'd had only one glimpse of his eyes, but it had
been enough. Life and death had been in them, and a
potential for violence she would never have guessed at. In the darkened car, she gripped her
hands together and prayed. He hadn't forgotten her. It infuriated
him that he had to fight to tuck her into some back corner of his
mind. There were innocent people in that store. A man and a woman. He
could smell the fear while he was still three yards away. But he broke his concentration long
enough to glance back and make certain she was staying put. He gestured Judd to one side of the
door while he took the other. He didn't have time to worry that the
rookie might freeze. Right now they were just two cops, and he had to
believe Judd would go with him through the door. The 9 mm felt warm in his hand. He'd
already identified the weapons of the two perpetrators. One had a
sawed-off shotgun, the other a wicked-looking .45. He could hear the
woman crying, pleading not to be hurt. Alex ignored it. They would
wait for backup as long as they could. He shifted just enough to look inside. Behind the counter, a woman of
approximately sixty stood with her hands at her throat, weeping. A
man of about the same age was emptying the cash register as fast as
his trembling hands allowed. One of the gunmen grabbed a bottle off a
shelf. He ripped off the top and guzzled. Swearing at the old man, he
smashed the bottle on the counter and jabbed the broken glass toward
his face. Alex had seen the look before, and he
knew they wouldn't be content with the money. "We're going in,"
he whispered to Judd. "You go low, go for the one on the right." Pale, Judd nodded. "Say when." "Don't fire your weapon unless you
have to." Alex sucked in his breath and went through the door.
"Police!" In the back of his mind he heard the sirens from
the backup as the first gunman swung the shotgun in his direction.
"Drop it!" he ordered, knowing it was useless. The woman
was already screaming before the first shots were fired. The shotgun blew out a bank of
fluorescent lights as the force of Alex's bullet sent the man
slamming backward. Alex was getting the second man in his sights when
a bullet from the .45 slammed into a bottle inches above his head,
spraying alcohol and glass. Judd fired, and stopped being a rookie. Slowly, with the same blank look on his
face, Alex came out of his crouch and studied his partner. Judd
wasn't pale now. He was green. "You okay?" "Yeah." After replacing his
weapon, Judd rubbed the back of his hand over his mouth. There was a
greasy knot in his stomach that was threatening to leap into his
throat. "It was my first." "I know. Go outside." "I'm okay." Alex gave him a nudge on the shoulder.
His hand remained there a moment, surprisingly gentle. "Go
outside anyway. Tell the backup to call an ambulance." Bess was waiting beside the car when
Alex came out some twenty minutes later. He looked the same, she
thought. Just the same as he'd looked when he walked in. Then he
lifted his head and looked at her, and she saw she was wrong. His eyes hadn't looked so tired, so
terribly tired, twenty minutes before. "I told you to stay in the car." "I did." "Then get back in." Gently she laid a hand on his arm.
"Alexi, you made your point. I'll take a cab. You have things to
do." "I've done them." He skirted
the car and yanked open the passenger door. She could almost feel his
body vibrating, but when he spoke, his voice was firm, sharp. "Get
in the damn car, Bess." She didn't have the heart to argue, so
she crossed over and complied. "What about Judd?" "He's heading to the cop shop to
file the report." "Oh." He let the silence hang for three
blocks. It hadn't been his first, but he hadn't told Judd that the
bright, shaky sickness didn't fade. It only turned inward, becoming
anger, disgust, frustration. And you never stopped asking yourself
why. "Aren't you going to ask how it
felt? What went through my mind? What happens next?" "No." She said it quietly. "I
don't have to ask when I can see. And it's easy enough to find out
what happens next." It wasn't what he wanted. He didn't
want her to be understanding, or quietly agreeable, or to turn those
damned sympathetic eyes on him. "Passing up a chance for grist
for your mill? McNee, you surprise me. Or can't your TV cop blow away
a couple of stoned perps?" He was trying to hurt her. Well, she
understood that, Bess thought. It often helped to lash
out when you were in pain. "I'm not sure I can fit it into any
of our scheduled story lines, but who knows?" His hands clenched on the wheel. "I
don't want to see you down there again, understand? If I do, I swear
I'll find a way to lock you up for a while." "Don't threaten me, Detective. You
had a rough night, and I'm willing to make allowances, but don't
threaten me." Leaning back, she shut her eyes. "In fact, do
us both a favor and don't talk to me at all." He didn't, but when he pulled up at her
building, the smoke from his anger was still hanging in the air.
Satisfied, she slammed out of the car. She'd taken two steps when he
caught up with her. "Come here," he demanded, and
hauled her against him. She tasted it, all the violence and pain and
fury of what he'd done that night. What he'd had to do. There was no
way for her to comfort. She wouldn't have dared. There was no way for
her to protest. She couldn't have tried. Instead, she let the
sizzling passion of the kiss sweep over her. Just as abruptly, he let her go. He'd
be trembling in a minute, and he knew it. God, he needed…
something from her. Needed, but didn't want. "Stay off my turf, McNee." He
turned on his heel and left her standing on the sidewalk.
Chapter 4
Contents - Prev/Next When it comes to murder," Bess
mused, "I like a nice, quick-acting poison. Something exotic, I
think." Lori pursed her lips. "If we're
going to do it, I really think he should be shot. Through the heart." Shifting in her seat at the cluttered
table, Bess scooped up a handful of sugared almonds. "Too
ordinary. Reed's a sophisticated, sensuous cad. I think he should go
out with more than just a bang." She munched and considered. "In
fact, we could make it a slow, insidious poison—milk a few
weeks of him wasting away." "Nagging headaches, dizzy spells,
loss of appetite," Lori put in. "And chills. He really should have
chills." Bess steepled her hands and imagined. "He gives
this big cocktail party, see. You know how he likes to flaunt his
power and money in the faces of all the people he's dumped on over
the years." Lori sighed. "That's why I love
him." "And why millions of viewers love
to hate him. If we're going to take him out, let's do it big. They're
all there at Reed's mansion… Jade, who's never forgiven him
for using her sister for his own evil ends. Elana, who's agonizing
over the fact that Reed will use his secret file, distorting the
information to discredit Max." "Mmm…" Getting into
the spirit, Lori gestured with her watered-down soft drink. "Brock,
who's furious that with one phone call Reed can upset the delicate
balance of the Tryson deal and cost Brock a fortune. And Miriam, of
course." "Of course. We haven't seen nearly
enough of her lately. Reed's self-destructive ex-wife, who blames him
for all her problems." "Justifiably," Lori pointed
out. "Then there's Vicki, the woman
scorned. Jeffrey, the cuckolded husband." She grinned. "And
the rest of the usual suspects." "Okay. What kind of poison?" "Something rare," Bess mused.
"Maybe Oriental. I'll work on it." She scribbled a reminder
on a notepad. "So they all have a motive for killing him. Even
the housekeeper, because he seduced her naive, innocent daughter,
then cast her aside. Sometime during the party, we see a glass of
champagne. The room's in shadows. Close-up on a small black vial. A
hand pours a few drops into the glass." "We'll see if it's a man or
woman." "The hand's gloved," Bess
decided, then realized how ridiculous it would be to wear gloves at a
cocktail party. "Okay, okay, we don't see it at the party.
Before. There's this box, see? This ornately carved wooden box." "And the gloved hand opens it.
Candlelight flickers off the glass vial as the hand removes it from
the bed of velvet." "That's the ticket. We'll cut to
that kind of thing three or four times during the week of the party.
Let the audience know it's bad business for somebody." "Meanwhile, Reed's playing
everyone like puppets. Handing out his personal brand of misery,
building the pressure to the boiling point, until it explodes on the
night of the party." "It'll be great," Bess
assured her. "Throughout the evening, Reed's enjoying himself
stirring up old fires, poking at sores. Miriam has too much to drink
and gets sloppy and shrill. This provides the perfect distraction for
our killer to doctor Reed's champagne. Because it's slow-acting, the
symptoms don't begin to show right away. We have some fatigue, a
little dizziness, some minor pain. Maybe a rash." "I like a good rash," Lori
agreed. "By the time he kicks off, it'll
be difficult for the cops to pinpoint the time and place when the
poison was administered. We just might have the perfect crime." "There is no perfect crime." Both Bess and Lori glanced toward the
doorway. Alex stood there, his hands tucked in his pockets. There was
a half smile on his face, a result of his enjoyment at listening to
them plotting a murder. "Besides, if your TV cop didn't figure
it out, your viewers would be pretty disappointed." "He'll figure it out." Bess
reached for another almond as she watched him, her bare feet propped
on the chair beside her. Alex discovered that the baggy slacks she
wore effectively hid her legs but didn't stop him from thinking about
them. "Did somebody call a cop?" she asked Lori. "Not me." Well aware that
three was most definitely a crowd, Lori rose. "Listen, I've got
to make a call, and I think I'll run up and peek in on the taping.
Nice to see you, Detective." "Yeah." He shifted so that
Lori could get through the door, but he didn't step inside. Instead,
he glanced around, annoyed with himself for feeling so awkward. "Some
place," he said at length. Bess's lips curved. The room was hardly
bigger than a closet and windowless. The table where she and Lori
worked was covered with books, folders and papers, and dominated by a
word processor that was still humming. Besides the table, there was
one overstuffed chair, a small couch and two televisions. "We call it home," Bess said,
and tilted her head. "So, what brings you down to the dungeons,
Alexi?" The description was fairly apt. They
were in the basement of the building that held the studios and
production offices for 'Secret Sins' and its network. He shrugged off
her question with one of his own. "How long are you in for?" "The duration, I hope."
Casually she rubbed the ball of one foot over the instep of the
other. "After the last Emmy, they did offer us an upstairs
office with a view, but Lori and I are creatures of habit. Besides,
who's going to come down here and peek over our shoulders while we
write?" She recrossed her ankles. "Are you off-duty?" "I took a couple hours personal
time." "Oh." She drew the word out,
thinking he looked very appealing when he was embarrassed. "Should
I consider this a personal visit?" "Yeah." He stepped inside,
then regretted it. There wasn't enough room to wander around.
"Listen, I just wanted to apologize." It was probably very small of her, Bess
thought, but, oh, she was enjoying this. "Generally or
specifically?" "Specifically." He shook his
head when she held out the bowl of almonds. "After the robbery
attempt, when I took you home. I was out of line." "Okay." She set the bowl down
and smiled at him. "We're dealing with your behavior during the
last half hour of the evening." His brows drew together. "Everything
I said before that sticks. You had no business doing what you were
doing, where you were doing it." "Get back to the apology. I like
that better." "I took what I was feeling out on
you, and I'm sorry." Figuring the worst was over, he sat on the
edge of the table. "You didn't react the way I expected." "Which was?" "Scared, outraged, disgusted."
He shrugged again. "I don't usually take women to armed
robberies." Now things were getting interesting.
"Where do you take them?" His gaze locked on hers. He knew when
he was being teased, and he knew when it was good-natured. "To
dinner, to the flicks, dancing. To bed." "Well, armed robbery is probably
more exciting. At least than the first three." She rose, placed
her hands on his shoulders and kissed him lightly on the mouth. "No
hard feelings." When his hands came to her hips and held her in
place, she lifted a brow. "Was there something else?" "I've been thinking about you." "That could be good." His lips twitched. "I haven't
decided that yet. Maybe we could start with dinner." "Start what?" "Working our way to bed. That's
where I want you." "Oh." Her breath came out a
little too quickly and not quite steady. It didn't help that his eyes
were calm, amused and very confident. How, she wondered, had their
positions been so neatly reversed? "That's certainly cutting to
the chase." "You said once that people in our
professions observe people. What I've observed about you, McNee, is
that you'd probably see through any flowers and moonbeams I might
toss at you." Slowly she ran her tongue over her
teeth. "Depends on your pitching arm. The idea isn't without its
appeal, Alexi, but I prefer taking certain aspects of my life—sex
being one of them—in a cautious, gradual manner." He grinned at her. "That could be
good." She had to laugh. "Meanwhile—"
But he didn't let her scoot back. "Meanwhile," he echoed,
keeping his hands firm. "Have dinner with me. Just dinner." Hadn't she told herself she wasn't
going to get involved again, fall in love again? Oh, well. "I
often enjoy just dinner." "Tomorrow. I'm on tonight." "Tomorrow's fine." He nudged her an inch closer. "I'm
making you nervous." "No, you're not." Yes, he
was. "You're wriggling." He
grinned again, surprised at how satisfying it was to know he'd
unsettled her. "I've got work, that's all." "Me too. Why don't I come by about
seven-thirty? My brother-in-law's got this place. I think you'll get
a kick out of it." "Lady clothes or real clothes?" "What are you wearing now?" She glanced down at her sweater and
slacks. "Real ones." "That'll do." He stood, then
tilted her chin with a finger until they were eye-to-eye. "You
have the oddest face,'' he said half to himself. "You should be
ugly." She laughed, unoffended. "I was.
I've burned all pictures of me before the age of eighteen." Her
dimple winked out as she smiled at him. "I imagine you were
always gorgeous." He winced, though he knew he should be
used to having that term applied to him. "My sisters were
gorgeous," he told her. "Are. My brother and I are ruggedly
attractive." "Ah, manly men." "You got it." "And you grew up surrounded by
flocks of adoring females." "We started with flocks and moved
on to hordes." Her eyes lit with amusement and
curiosity. "What was it like to—" He cut her off the most sensible way.
He liked the quick little jolt her body gave before she settled into
him. And the way her mouth softened, accepted. No pretenses here, he
thought as she gave a quiet sigh and melted into the kiss. It was
simple and easy, as basic as breathing. If his system threatened to overcharge,
he knew how to control it. Perhaps he drew the kiss out longer than
he'd intended to, deepened it more than he had planned. But he was
still in control. Maybe, for just a moment, he imagined what it would
be like to lock the door, to sweep all those papers off the table and
take her, fast and hot, on top of it. But he wasn't a maniac. He reminded
himself of that, even as his blood began to swim. A slow and gentle
touch brought pleasure to both, and let a woman see that she was
appreciated for everything she was. "Dangerous," he murmured in
Ukrainian as he slid his mouth from her. "Very dangerous woman." "What?" She blinked at him
with eyes that were arousingly unfocused and heavy. "What does
that mean?" He had to make a conscious effort to
keep his hands gentle at her shoulders. "I said I have to go.
Keep off the streets, McNee." She called to him as he reached the
doorway. "Detective." Her heart was thumping, her head was
reeling, but she really hated not having the last word. For lack of
anything better, she dredged up an old line from "Hill Street
Blues." "Let's be careful out there." Alone, she lowered herself into a
chair, as carefully as an elderly aunt. Five minutes later, Lori
found her in exactly the same spot, still staring into space. "Uh-oh." One look had Lori
dropping down beside her. With a shake of her head, she handed Bess a
fresh soft drink. "I knew it. I knew this was going to happen
the minute I saw that gorgeous cop at your party." "It hasn't happened yet."
Bess took a long drink. Funny, she hadn't realized how dry her throat
had become. "I'm afraid it's going to, but it hasn't happened
yet." "You had that same look on your
face when you fell for Charlie. And for Sean. And Miguel. Not to
mention—" "Then don't." Frowning, she
focused on Lori. "Miguel? Are you certain? I was sure I had
better taste." "Miguel," Lori said
ruthlessly. "Granted, you came to your senses within forty-eight
hours, but the day after he took you to the opera you had the same
stupid look on your face." "We saw Carmen," Bess pointed
out. "I don't think the look had anything to do with him.
Besides, I'm not in love with Alexi, I'm just having dinner with him
tomorrow." "That's what you always say. Like
with George." Bess's shoulders straightened. "George
was the sweetest man I've ever known. Being engaged to him taught me
a lot about understanding and compassion." "I know. You were understanding
enough to be godmother to his firstborn." "Well, after all, I did introduce
him to Nancy." "And he promptly dumped you and
ran off with her." "He didn't dump me. I wish you
wouldn't hold that against him, Lori. Breaking our engagement was a
mutual decision." "And the best thing to happen to
you. George was a wimp. A whiny wimp." Because it was precisely true, Bess
sighed. "He just needed a lot of emotional support." "At least you never slept with
him." "He was saving himself." They looked at each other and burst out
laughing. Once she caught her breath, Bess shook her head. "I
should never have told you that. It was indiscreet." "Observation," Lori
announced, and Bess gestured a go-ahead. "The cop isn't going to
save himself." "I know." Bess felt the
warning flutter in her stomach. Thoughtfully she drew her finger down
through the moisture on the bottle. "I'll cross that bridge when
I come to it." "Bess, you don't cross bridges,
you bum them." Lori gave her hand a quick squeeze. "Don't
get hurt." There was a touch of regret in Bess's
smile. "Do I ever?" Alex liked the way she looked. It took
a certain panache, he supposed, to be able to wear the jade-toned
blouse with bright blue slacks, particularly if you were going to add
hot-pink high-tops. But Bess pulled it off. Everything about her was
vivid. He supposed that was why he'd gone into her office to
apologize and ended up asking her out. It was probably why he hadn't been able
to get her, or the idea of taking her to bed, out of his mind since
he'd met her. For herself, Bess took one look at
Zackary Muldoon's bar, Lower the Boom, and knew she had a relaxed,
enjoyable evening in store. There was music from the juke box, a
babble of voices, a medley of good, rich scents. The tangle of
pear-shaped gemstones at her ears swung as she turned to Alex. "This
is great. Is the food as good as it smells?" "Better." He gave a wave in
the general direction of the bar as he found them a table. As usual, the bar was cluttered with
people and thick with noise. Since his sister had married Zack, Alex
had made a habit of dropping in once a week or so, and he knew most
of the regulars by name. He grinned at the waitress who stopped at
their table. "Hey, Lola. How's it going?" "It'll do, cutie." Resting
her tray on her hip, Lola gave Bess the once-over. Though less than
ten years Alex's senior, Lola had taken a maternal interest in him.
It wasn't often Alex brought a date into the bar, and Lola made it
her business to check out his current lady. "So, what can I get
you?" "Tequila." Bess dropped her
bag in the empty chair beside her with a thunk. "Straight up." Alex only lifted a brow at Bess's
choice. "Give me a beer, Lola. Rachel around?" "Upstairs. And she better have her
feet up." She gave the ceiling a scowl. "She'll probably
sneak down here fore the night's over. Can't keep her away from the
boss." "What's Rio's special tonight?" "Paella." Her eyes lit with
appreciation. She'd sampled some herself. "He's been driving
Nick crazy, making him shell shrimp." "You game for that?" Alex
asked Bess. "You bet." As Lola wandered
off, Bess propped her chin on her hands. "So, who's the boss,
who's Rio, and who's Nick?" "Zack's the boss." He
gestured toward the tall, broad-shouldered man working the bar.
"Rio's the cook, this Jamaican giant who'll fix you the best
meal this side of heaven. Nick's Zack's brother." Bess nodded. She liked to know the
players. "And Rachel's married to Zack." After a long study
of the man behind the bar, she smiled. "Impressive. How'd she
meet him?" "She was Nick's PD after I busted
him for attempted burglary." Bess didn't blink or look shocked, she
simply leaned a little closer. "What was he stealing?" Alex was vaguely disappointed that he
hadn't gotten a reaction. "Electronics—and doing a poor
job of it. He was tangled up with a gang at the time. This was about
a year and a half ago." Absently he toyed with the square-cut
aquamarine on her finger, watching it catch the light. "Nick had
some problems. Actually, he's Zack's stepbrother. Nick was still a
kid when Zack went off and joined the navy and his mother died.
Anyhow, when Zack came back a few years ago, his father was dying,
and the kid was chin-deep in trouble." "This is great." Bess beamed
up at Lola as their drinks were served. "Thanks." The smile did it. Lola sent Alex a look
of approval before she swung by the bar to report to Zack. "Don't stop now." Alex lifted his mug of beer. He knew
very well that Lola was giving Zack a sotto voce rundown of her
impressions and opinions of his choice of companion. "You want
to hear the whole thing?'' "Of course I do." Bess
sprinkled salt on her wrist, licked it, then tossed back the tequila
with all the flair of a Mexican bandit. While she sucked on the lime
wedge Lola had brought with the drink, she grinned at Zack. "I
like the zing." "How many times can you do that
and live?" "I haven't tested it that far."
The liquor left a nice trail of heat down her throat and into her
stomach. "I did ten once, but I was younger then, and stupid. So
keep going." She leaned forward again. "Zack came back
after sailing the seven seas and found his brother in trouble." "Well, Nick was tangled up with
the Cobras…" Alex began. By the time their paella was
served, he was enjoying himself. It always polished a man's ego to
have a woman's complete and fascinated attention. "So that's how
I ended up on the point of having an Irish-Ukrainian niece or
nephew." "Terrific. You've got a flair for
storytelling, Alexi. Must be some Gypsy blood in there." "Naturally." She smiled at him. All he needed was a
hoop of gold in one ear and a violin, she thought—but she was
sure he wouldn't want to hear it. "It doesn't hurt that you have
this wisp of an accent that peeks out now and then. Of course, your
material's first-rate, too. I'm a sucker for happy endings. I can't
have many of them in my field. Once we tie things up, we have to
unravel them again, or we lose the audience." "Why? I thought most people went
for the happy ending." "They do. But in soaps, a
character loses the edge if he or she isn't dealing with some crisis
or tragedy." She sampled the paella and sighed her satisfaction.
"That's why Elana's been married twice, had amnesia, was
sexually assaulted, had two miscarriages and a nervous breakdown,
went temporarily blind, shot a former lover in self-defense, overcame
a gambling addiction, had twins who were kidnapped by a psychotic
nurse—and recovered them only after a long, heartrending and
perilous search through the South American jungles." She took
another glorious bite. "Not necessarily in that order." Before Alex could ask who Elana was,
Lola was setting down fresh drinks. "You watch 'Secret Sins'?"
she asked Bess. "Religiously. You?" "Well, yeah." She shrugged,
knowing there were several patrons in the bar who'd rag her about it.
"I got hooked when I was in the hospital having my youngest.
He's ten now. That was back when Elana was a first-year resident at
Millbrook Memorial and in love with Jack Banner. He was a great
character." "One of the best," Bess
agreed. "Brooding and self-destructive." "I was really sorry when he died
in that warehouse fire. I didn't think Elana would ever get over it." "She's a tough lady," Bess
commented. "Had to be." When someone
called her, Lola waved to them to wait. "If it hadn't been for
her, Storm would never have gotten himself together and become the
man he is today." "You like Storm?" "Oh, man, who wouldn't?" With
a chuckle, Lola rolled her eyes. "The guy's every woman's
fantasy, you know? I'm really pulling for him and Jade. They deserve
some happiness, after everything they've been through. Jeez, all
right, Harry, I'm on my way. Enjoy your dinner," she said to
Bess, and hurried off. Bess turned to Alex with a smile. "You
look confused." He only shook his head. "You two
were talking about those characters as though they were real people." "But they are," Bess told
him, and scooped up some shrimp. "For an hour a day, five days a
week. Didn't you ever believe in Batman, or Sam Spade? Scarlett
O'Hara, Indiana Jones?" "It's fiction." "Good fiction creates its own
reality. That's entertainment." Picking up the saltshaker, she
grinned. "Come on, Alexi, even a cop needs to fantasize now and
then." He looked at her long enough to make
her pulse dance. "I do my share." Bess swallowed the tequila, but its
zing paled beside the one that Alex's quiet statement had streaking
through her. "You'll have to tell me about that sometime."
She glanced around at the sound of piano music. Against the far wall was a huge
upright. A slimly built, sandy-haired young man was caressing blues
out of the keys. "That's Nick," Alex told her. "Really?" Bess angled her
chair around for a better look. "He's very good." "Yeah. He talked Zack into putting
a piano in the bar about a year ago. Rachel and Muldoon tried to get
him to go back to school, get more training, but no dice." "Some things can't be taught,"
Bess murmured. "Looks like. Anyway, he still
works in the kitchen with Rio, and comes out and plays when the mood
strikes." "And has every female in the joint
mooning over him." "He's just a kid," Alex said
quickly—too quickly. With her tongue in her cheek, Bess
turned back. "Younger men have their own appeal
to the experienced woman. In fact, right now Jessica is embroiled in
a passionate affair with Tod—who's ten years her junior. The
mail is running five to one in favor." "We were talking about you." She only smiled. "Were we?" Zack walked over to slap Alex on the
back. "How's the meal?" "It's terrific." Bess held
out a hand. "You're Zack? I'm Bess." "Nice to see you." Zack kept
a hand on Alex's shoulder after giving Bess's a quick squeeze. "You
must be the Bess Rachel ran into down at the station." "I must be. You have a great place
here. Now that I've found it, I'll be back." "That's what we like to hear."
His blue eyes sparkled with friendly curiosity. "Alex doesn't
bring his ladies around very often. He likes to keep us guessing." She couldn't help but respond to the
humor in Zack's eyes. "Is that so?" "Ease off, Muldoon," Alex
muttered. "He's still sore at me for
stealing his baby sister." Alex sent him an arched look. "I
just figured she had better taste." He lifted his beer.
"Speaking of which." He gestured with the mug. Bess saw Zack's eyes change and,
recognizing love, her heart sighed. It didn't surprise her-when
Rachel came to the table. "What's this?" Rachel
demanded. "A party, and nobody invited me?" "Sit," Zack and Alex said in
unison. "I'm tired of sitting."
Ignoring them both, she turned to Bess. "Nice to see you again."
She took a deep, appreciative sniff. "Rio's paella. Incredible,
isn't it?" "Yes, it is. Alex was just telling
me how the two of you met." "Oh?" Rachel's brow lifted. "Why don't you join us and give me
your side of it?" Twenty minutes later, Alex was forced
to admit that Bess's casual friendliness had gotten Rachel to sit
down and relax in a way neither he nor Zack would have been able to
with their demanding concern. For a woman who was so full of energy
and verve, she had a knack for putting people at ease, he noted. A gift for listening to details and
asking just the right question. And for entertaining, he
mused—effortlessly. It didn't surprise him that she was
able to talk music with Nick when he was called over to join them, or
food with Rio when she asked to go back into the kitchen to
compliment him on the meal. He wasn't surprised when she and Rachel
made a date to meet for lunch the following week. "I like your family," Bess
stated as they settled into a cab. "You've only met a fraction of
it." "Well, I like the one's I've met.
How much more do you have?" "My parents. Another sister, her
husband, their three kids. A brother, his wife, and their kid. What
about you?" "Hmm?" "Family." "Oh. I was an only child. Do they
all live in New York?" "All but Natasha." He toyed
with the curls at the nape of her neck. "You don't talk about
yourself." "Are you kidding?" She
laughed, though she wanted to curl like a cat into the fingers
brushing her skin. "I never stop talking." "You ask questions. You talk about
things, other people, your characters. But you don't talk about
Bess." She should have known a cop would
notice what most people didn't. "We haven't had that many
conversations," she pointed out. When she turned her head, her
mouth was close to his. She wanted to kiss him, Bess thought. It
wasn't merely to distract him. After all, she had nothing to hide.
But she didn't speak, only moved her lips to his. The fingers at the back of her neck
tensed as he changed the angle of the kiss and the mood of it. It was
light and friendly only for an instant. Then it darkened, deepened,
lengthened. Mixed with the taste, the texture, were hints of what was
to come. There's a storm brewing, Bess thought
dizzily. And, oh, she'd never been able to resist a storm. Her heart was knocking by the time his
lips moved to her temple. "You know how to change the subject,
McNee." "What subject?" His hand slid to her throat, cupped
there. He felt the pigeon beat of her rapid pulse. The rhythm of it
was as seductive as jungle drums. "You. Now I'm only more
curious." "There's not that much to tell."
Uneasy and confused by the sensation, she drew back as the cab pulled
to the curb. "Looks like we're here." She slid across the
seat while Alex paid the driver. Her knees were a little weak, she
realized. Another first. Alexi Stanislaski was going to require some
thought. "You don't have to walk me up." she said,
surprised that it unnerved her to see the cab pull away and leave the
two of them alone on the shadowy sidewalk. "Which means you're not going to
ask me in." "No." She smiled a little,
running her fingers up and down the strap of her bag. But she wanted
to. It was amazing to her just how much she wanted to. "I think
it would be smarter if I didn't." He accepted that, because the choice
had to be hers. And the prospect of changing her mind along the way
was tremendously appealing. "We'll do this again." "Yes." He closed a hand over her restless one,
brought it to his lips. "Soon." She felt something, a small, vague ache
centered in her heart. Confused by it, she slipped her hand away.
"All right. Soon. Good night." "Hold it." Before she could
turn away, he took her face in his hands, held it there for a moment
before lowering his mouth to hers. The pressure was whisper-light,
persuasive, invasive. Even as she responded, the kiss had that odd
ache spreading. Helpless, she brought her hands to his wrists,
clinging to them for balance. Though his mouth remained beautifully
gentle, the pulse she felt beneath her fingers raced in time with her
own. Then he let her go, stepped back. His
eyes stared into hers. "Good night," he said. She managed a nod before hurrying
inside. There was something about Bess, Alex
thought as he waited patiently for the light in her apartment to come
on. Something. He'd just have to find out what it was.
Chapter 5
Contents - Prev/Next The last person Bess expected to see
when she left her office a few days later was Rosalie. Even in the
bustling crowds of midtown, the woman stood out. After a moment of
blank surprise, Bess smiled and crossed the sidewalk. "Hi. Were you waiting for me?" "Yeah." "You should have come in."
Bess adjusted the weight of her bag and briefcase. "I figured it would be better for
you if I waited out here." "Don't be silly…" Her
words trailed off as she tried to see through and around Rosalie's
huge tinted glasses. Those sunburst colors around the left eye
weren't all cosmetics. Bess's friendly smile faded. "What
happened to you?" Rosalie shrugged. "Bobby. He was a
little ticked off about the other night." "That's despicable." "I've had worse." "Bastard." She said it
between her teeth, but overlying her fury was a terrible sense of
guilt. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. It was my fault." "Ain't nobody's fault, girlfriend.
Just the way things are." "It's not the way they should be.
And if I hadn't…" She let that go, knowing you could only
go back and change things in scripts. "Do you want to go to the
police? I'll go with you. We could—" "Hell, no." Rosalie let out
what passed for a laugh. "I'd get a lot worse than a sore eye if
I tried that. And if you think there's a cop alive who gives a damn
about a hooker with a black eye, you are as dumb as you look." Alex would care, Bess thought. She
refused to believe otherwise. "We'll do whatever you want." Rosalie pulled out a cigarette, cocking
her hip as she lit it. "Listen, you said you'd pay me to talk. I
figure I can use the extra money. And I'm on my own time." "All right." Ideas were
beginning to stir. "How much do you average a night?" As a matter of course, Rosalie started
to inflate it, but found the lie stuck in her throat. "After
Bobby takes his cut, about seventy-five. Maybe a hundred. Business
isn't as good as it used to be." "We'll talk." Distracted,
Bess searched for a cab. "We'll never get a taxi at this hour,"
she mumbled. "I live uptown about twenty blocks. Do you mind
walking?" This time Rosalie laughed full and
long. "Girl, walking the streets comes natural to me." Once they reached Bess's apartment,
Rosalie tipped down her shaded glasses and whistled. Unable to
resist, she walked to one of the wide windows. She could see a swatch
of the East River through other buildings. The sound of traffic was
so muted, it was almost musical. A far cry from the clatter and roar
she lived with every day. "My, oh, my, you do live high." "How about dinner?"
Automatically Bess stepped out of her shoes. "We'll order in."
Red meat, Bess thought. At the moment, she could have eaten it raw.
"Sit down, I'll get us some wine." Wine, Rosalie thought as she stretched
out on the plump cushions of the pit. She figured that sounded just
dandy. "You pay for all this just writing stuff?" "Mostly." On impulse, Bess
chose one of the best bottles in her wine rack. "You're not a
vegetarian, are you?" Rosalie snorted. "Get real." "Good. I want a steak." After
handing Rosalie a glass, she picked up the phone to order dinner. "I can't pay for that." "I'm buying," Bess assured
her, and curled up on the couch. "I need a consultant, Rosalie."
It was a risk, but so was breathing, she decided. "I'll give you
five hundred a week." Rosalie choked on the wine. "Five
hundred, just to tell you about turning tricks?" "No. I want more. I want why. I
want you to tell me about the other women. What draws them in. What
you're afraid of, what you're not. When I ask you a question, I'll
want an answer." Her voice was brisk now, all business. "I'll
know if you lie." Rosalie's eyes were shrewd and steady.
"You need all that for a TV show?" "You'd be surprised." It had
gone well beyond the show. The bruise on Rosalie's face grated on
her. She had caused it, Bess reflected. She would find a way to fix
it. "I'm buying a lot of your time for five hundred a week,
Rosalie. You might want to take a little vacation from Bobby." "What I do after I talk to you is
for me to say." "Absolutely. But if you decided
you wanted to take a break from the streets, and if you needed a
place to stay while you did, I could help you." . "Why?" Bess smiled. "Why not? It wouldn't
cost me any more." Intrigued, Rosalie considered. "I'll
think about it." "Fine. We can get started right
away." She rose to gather up pads, pencils, her tape recorder.
"Remember, this is daytime TV, and we can only do so much. I'll
have to filter down a great deal of what you tell me. Why don't I
fill you in on the story line?" Rosalie merely shrugged. "It's
your nickel." "Yes, it is." She settled
down again, and was weaving the complex and overlapping relationships
of Millbrook—to Rosalie's confusion and fascination—when
she heard the buzzer for her private elevator. Still talking, she
walked over to release the security lock. "So, anyway, the Josie
personality is dynamically opposed to Jade. The stronger she gets,
the more confused and frightened Jade becomes. She doesn't remember
where she's been when Josie comes out. And the lapses are getting
longer." "Sounds like the lady needs a
shrink." "Actually, she'll go to
Elana—she's a psychiatrist—but that's down the road a
bit. And under hypnosis—Ah, here's the food." At the
elevator's ding, Bess opened the door. The smile froze on her face. "Alexi." "Don't you bother to ask who it is
before you let someone come up?" He shook his head before he
caught her chin in his hand and kissed her. "Yes—that is, not when I'm
expecting someone. What are you doing here?" "Kissing you?" And, at that
moment, she wasn't as responsive as he'd come to expect. Then it
occurred to him that she'd said she was expecting someone. A man? A
date? A lover? His eyes cooled as he stepped back. "I guess I
should have called first." "No. I mean, yes. That is…
are you off tonight?" "I go back on in a couple hours." "Oh. Well." The buzzer
sounded again. "You could always tell him I'm the
plumber." Baffled, she stepped back inside to
release the elevator. "Tell who what?" "The guy on his way up." "Why should I tell the delivery
boy you're a plumber?" "Delivery boy?" A sound
inside the apartment had him edging closer. He wasn't jealous, damn
it, he was just curious. "I guess you've already got company,"
he began, and pushed the door wider. "Actually, I do." Giving up,
Bess gestured him inside. "We were just about to have some
dinner." He looked over at the couch just as
Rosalie stood. Caught between them, Bess felt herself battered by
double waves of hostility. "What the hell is she doing here?" "You called the cops,"
Rosalie said accusingly before Bess could answer. "You called
the damn cops." "No. No, I didn't." Rosalie was already striding across the
room. Bess knew that if the woman made it to the door she would have
lost her chance. "Rosalie." She grabbed her arm. "I
didn't call him." "And why the hell didn't you?"
Alex tossed back. "Because it's none of your
business." Still gripping Rosalie, Bess swirled on him. "This
is my home, and she's my guest." "And you're a bigger idiot than I
thought." Sizing up the situation, Rosalie
relaxed fractionally. "You two got a thing?" "Yes," Alex shot back. "No," Bess snapped, then
sighed. "Something in between the two," she mumbled. She
snatched her wallet out of her bag as she heard the elevator ding.
"Excuse me. That's dinner." While she herded the delivery boy
inside to set up the meal, Alex and Rosalie stood eyeing each other
with mutual dislike and suspicion. "What's the game, Rosalie?" "No game." She flashed a
smile that was as feral as a shark's. "I'm a paid consultant.
Your lady hired me." "The hell with that." He
paused a moment, studying her bruised eye. "Bobby do that?" Rosalie angled her chin. "I walked
into a door." "Sure you did." He did care.
Bess might have been surprised at how much he cared. Rosalie
certainly would have been stunned. But he also knew there were things
that couldn't be fixed. "You'll want to watch your step." "I don't make the same mistake
twice." He turned away from her, his hands
balled into fists in his pockets. "McNee, I want to talk to
you." "Oh, just shut up." She
didn't bother to look up as she counted out bills. "Can't you
see I'm trying to figure the tip? There you go." "Thanks, lady." The delivery
boy tucked the bills away. "Enjoy your dinner." "There's enough for three,"
Bess stated, turning toward Alex. "But you're not going to stay
if you're rude." "Rude?" The single word
bounced off her ceiling. He was beside her in two strides. "You
think it's rude for me to ask you if you've lost your mind when I
walk in and find you've invited a hooker to dinner?" Her eyes narrowed. "Out." "Damn it, Bess…" "I said out." She gave him a
hefty shove toward the door. "We went on one date," she
reminded him. "One. Maybe I entertained the idea of something
more, but that gives you no right to come into my house and tell me
what to do and who to talk with." He grabbed her hand before she could
push him again. "One has nothing to do with the other." "You're right. Absolutely right.
What I should have said is that I run my life, Detective." She
snatched her hand away so that she could poke a finger at his chest.
"Me. Alone. Get the picture?" "Yeah." He wondered how she'd
like a nice clip on that pointy little chin of hers. "I've got a
picture for you." He hauled her up and kissed her hard. No
gentle touch, no finesse. All steam heat. It lasted only seconds, but
he succeeded in shocking her speechless. "Things change, McNee."
Dark, furious eyes pinned her to the spot. "Get used to it." With that, he stormed out, slamming the
door behind him. "Well." Bess took one breath,
then another. Her throat felt scalded. "Of all the incredible
nerve. Who the hell does he think he is, marching in here that way?"
Hands on her hips, she spun to face Rosalie. "Did you see that?" "Hard to miss it." Grinning,
Rosalie snatched a french fry from a plate. "If he thinks he's getting away
with that—that attitude—he's very much mistaken." "Man's nuts about you." "Excuse me?" "Girl, that was one lovesick
puppy." Bess snatched up her wine and gulped.
"Don't be ridiculous. He was just showing off." "Uh-huh. If I had me a man who
looked at me like that, I'd do one of two things." "Which are?" "I'd either sit back and enjoy, or
I'd run for my life." Frowning, Bess sat down and picked up
her fork. "I don't like to be pushed." "Seems to me it depends on who's
doing the pushing." She sat, as well, and dug right into her
steak. "He sure is one fine-looking man—for a cop." Bess stabbed at her salad. "I
don't want to talk about him." "You're paying the tab,"
Rosalie said agreeably. With a grunt of assent, Bess tried to eat.
Damn cop, she thought. He'd ruined her appetite. There was something to be said for
beating the hell out of inanimate objects. Alex had always found the
therapy of a pair of boxing gloves and a punching bag immeasurably
rewarding. With those so easily accessible, he could never figure out
why so many people felt the need for a psychiatrist's couch. Until recently. Twenty minutes of sweating and pounding
hadn't relieved his basic frustration. He often used the gym—in
the middle of a difficult case, when one went wrong, when a good
arrest turned sour in court. The same ingredients had worked equally
well for him whenever he'd fought with family, or friends, or had
female problems. Not this time. Whatever hold Bess McNee had on him,
Alex couldn't seem to punch himself out of it "So much energy, so early." The familiar voice had Alex blinking
away the sweat that had dripped through his headband into his eyes.
His brother Mikhail, and Alex's ten-month-old nephew, Griff, were
standing hand in hand, grinning identical grins. "Got your papa out early, did you,
tough guy?" Alex swung Griff up for a smacking kiss. Griff babbled out happily. The only
word Alex could decipher in the odd foreign language of a toddler was
Mama. "Sydney's tired," Mikhail
explained. "She has some wheeling and dealing keeping her up at
night. This one's an early riser." He ruffled his son's hair.
"So I thought we'd come down and lift weights. Right?" Griff grinned and cocked his elbows.
"Papa." "Your muscle's bigger," Alex
assured him. "Hey, it's the Griff-man!"
Rocky, the former lightweight who ran the gym, gave a whistle and
held out his wiry arms. "Come see me, champ." With a squeal of pleasure, Griff
wiggled out of Alex's arms to toddle off on his almost steady legs.
"Better watch out, Rock," Mikhail called out. "He's
slippery." "I can handle him." With the
confidence of a four-time grandfather, he hefted Griff. "We got
things to do," he told Mikhail. "Why don't you talk to your
brother there and find out why this is the third time this week he's
come in to pound on my equipment?" "Nosy," Alex muttered. "He's
worse than an old woman." Mikhail tilted a brow when Alex went
back to pounding the bag. "Speaking of women…" "We weren't." "Why do men come to such places as
this unless it's to talk of women?" The music of the Ukraine
flavored Mikhail's voice. Alex wondered if his brother knew how much
he sounded like their father. "To hit things," he retorted.
"To talk dirty and to sweat." "That, too. So, it is a woman,
yes?" "It's always a damn woman,"
Alex said between gritted teeth. "This one's named Bess." Alex's punch stopped in midswing.
Turning, he used his forearm to swipe his brow. "How do you know
about Bess?" "Rachel tells me." Pleased,
Mikhail grinned. "She also tells me that this Bess is not
beautiful so much as unique," and that she's smart. This isn't
your usual type, Alexi." "She's nobody's type." Alex
turned back to the bag, feinted with his right, then jabbed with his
left. "Unique," he said with a snort. "That's her, all
right. Her face. It was like God was distracted that day and mixed up
the features for five different women. Her eyes are too big, her
chin's pointed, her nose is crooked." His gloved fist plowed
into the bag. "And she has skin like an angel. I touch it and my
mouth waters." "Mmm… I'll have to get a
look at this one." "I've sworn off," Alex told
him between grunts. "I don't need the aggravation. She doesn't
have all her circuits working at the same time. Maybe Rachel thinks
she's smart because she went to college." "Radcliffe," Mikhail
supplied. "She had lunch with Rachel, and Rachel asked." "Radcliffe?" Letting out a
breath, Alex leaned against the bag. "It figures." "She also told Rachel that the two
of you had a… misunderstanding." "I understood perfectly. Look,
maybe she went to some fancy college, but you couldn't fill up a
teaspoon with her common sense. I don't need to get involved with
someone that flaky." Mikhail's bark of laughter echoed
through the gym. "This from a man who once dated Miss Lug
Wrench." "It was Miss Carburetor." "Ah, that's different." A smile twitched, and Alex punched
halfheartedly at the bag. Working up a sweat hadn't relaxed him, but
five minutes with Mikhail was doing the job. "Anyway, we're
finished before we got started. And both better off." "Undoubtedly you're right." "I know I'm right. We'd always be
coming at things from different angles. Hers is cross-eyed. She
doesn't see anything the way she should." "A difficult woman." "Difficult." Alex held out
his hands so that Mikhail could unlace his gloves. "That doesn't
begin to describe her. She acts so mild and relaxed, you wouldn't
think you could rile her with a cattle prod. Then you point out an
obvious mistake, for her own good, and she jumps on you with both
feet. Kicks you out of the house." Mikhail tucked his tongue in his cheek.
"You're better off without her." "You're telling me." Alex
tossed his gloves aside and flexed his hands. "Who needs
unreasonable women?" "Men." "Yeah." With a sigh, Alex
sent his brother a miserable look. "I want her so much I can't
breathe." "I know the feeling." He
punched his brother's sweaty shoulder. "So go get her." "Go get her," Alex repeated. "Put her in her place." A dangerous light, one Mikhail
recognized, flickered in Alex's eyes. "Her place. Right." "Hey!" Mikhail called out
when his brother strode off. "The showers are that way." "I'll catch one at the station.
See you later." "Later," Mikhail agreed. He
wandered off to find his son, wondering how soon he would meet this
unique, unreasonable woman without common sense. She sounded perfect for his baby
brother. Bess was never at her best in the
morning, and she suspected anyone who was. Her alarm was buzzing when
she heard the pounding on her door. She'd been ignoring the first for
nearly ten minutes, but the incessant knocking had her dragging
herself out of bed. Bleary-eyed, pulling a skimpy silk robe
over an equally skimpy nightshirt, she stumbled to the door. "What
the hell?" she demanded. "Is it a fire or what?" "Or what," Alex told her when
she yanked open the door. Struggling to focus, she dragged a hand
through her hair. The robe drooped off one shoulder. "How'd you
get up here?" "Flashed my badge for the security
guard." After closing the door behind him, he looked his fill.
There was a great deal to be said for a sleepy woman in rumpled white
silk. "Get you up, McNee?" "What time is it?" She turned
away, following the scent from her coffeemaker, which was set to brew
at 7:20 each morning. "What day is it?" "Thursday." He followed her
weaving progress through the living area and into a big
white-and-navy kitchen. There was a huge arrangement of fresh orchids
on the center island. Orchids in the kitchen, he thought. Only Bess.
"About 7:30." "In the morning?" Blindly she
groped for a mug. "What are you doing here at 7:30 on a Thursday
morning?" "This." He spun her around.
The taste of her mouth, warm and soft from sleep, had him groaning.
Before she could think—he didn't want either of them to
think—he slipped his tongue between her lips to seduce hers.
Her body went stiff, then melted, softening against his like candle
wax touched by a flame. Through the roaring of his blood, he
heard the crash as the china mug she'd held slipped from her fingers
and smashed on the tiles. Was she still dreaming? Bess wondered.
Her dreams had always been very vivid, but this… It wouldn't
be possible to feel so much, need so desperately, in a dream. And she could taste him. Really taste
him. A mingling of man and desire and salty sweat. Delicious. His
mouth was so hot, so unyielding, just as his hands were through the
thin silk she wore. She could feel the cool tiles beneath
her feet, a shivery contrast to the heat roaring around her. Under
her palms, his cheeks were rough, arousingly rough. And she heard her
own voice, a muffled, confused sound, as she tried to say his name. "I have to wake up," she
managed when his mouth left hers to cruise over her throat. "I
really have to." "You are awake." He had to
touch her—just once. However unfair his advantage, he had to.
So he cupped her breasts in his hands, molding their firmness through
the silk, brushing his thumbs, feather-light, over straining nipples.
"See?" She'd never been the swooning type, but
she was afraid this would be a first. "I have to—"
She gasped, for as she'd started to step back, he'd swept her up into
his arms. A skitter of panic, completely unfamiliar, raced down her
spine. "Alexi, don't." He covered her mouth again, felt her
trembling surrender. And knew he could. And could not. "Your
feet are bare," he said, and set her on the counter. "I
made you drop your cup." Shaken, she stared down at the shards
of broken crockery. "Oh." "You have a broom?" "A broom." She-was awake now,
wide-awake. But her mind was still mush. "Somewhere. Why?" He was making her stupid, he realized,
and grinned. "So I can clean it up before you cut yourself. Stay
there." He walked to a likely-looking closet and located a
dustpan and broom. Because he was a man whose mother had trained him
well in such matters, he went about the sweeping job quickly and
competently. "So, have you missed me?" "I haven't given you a thought."
She blew the hair out of her eyes. "Hardly." "Me either." He dumped the
shards into the trash, replaced the broom and dustpan. "How
about some coffee?" "Sure." Maybe that would help
her regain her normal composure. As he poured, she caught a whiff of
him over the homey morning aroma. "You smell like a locker
room." "Sorry. I was at the gym."
When he handed her the coffee, she sat where she was and sipped. Half
a cup later, she was able to take her first clear-eyed look at him. He looked fabulous. Rough and sweaty
and ready for action. The thick tangle of hair was falling over a
faded gray sweatband. His face was unshaven, his NYPD T-shirt was
ripped and darkened in a vee down the chest, his sweatpants were
loose and frayed at the cuffs. When she lifted her gaze back to his,
he smiled. "Good morning, McNee." "Good morning." He skimmed a finger over her thigh. She
was sensitive there, he noted. He could tell by the way her eyes
darkened and the pulse in her throat picked up the beat. "I'm
not apologizing this time." "You should be." "No. I'm right about this."
He put a finger over her lips before she could speak. "Trust me.
I'm a cop." He could have all but seduced her in
her own kitchen before her eyes were even open, but she had a point
to make. Closing a hand over his wrist, she drew his hand away. "My
personal decisions, whether they have to do with my professional or
my private life, are just that. Personal. I've been making those
decisions, right or wrong, for a long time. I don't intend to stop
now." "I'm not going to see you hurt." "That's very sweet, Alexi."
Softening a bit, she brushed a hand through his hair. "I don't
intend to be hurt." "You don't know what you're
dealing with. Oh, you think you do," he continued, recognizing
the look in her eyes. "But all you know is the surface. There
are things that go on in the streets, every day, every night, that
you have no conception of. You never will." She couldn't argue, not with what she
saw in his face. "Maybe not. I don't see what you see, or know
what you know. Maybe I don't want to. My friendship with Rosalie—" "Friendship?" "Yes." The expression on her
face dared him to contradict her. "I feel something for
her—about her." With a helpless gesture, Bess set her cup
aside. "I can't possibly explain it to you, Alexi. You're not a
woman. I can help her. Don't tell me it's a fairy tale to believe I
can save her from the streets and what she's chosen to be. I've
gotten that advice already." "From someone with at least half a
brain," he surmised. "I had no idea this had gotten so out
of hand. You said you wanted to talk to her for background stuff for
your story." "That's true enough." But
Bess remembered the bruise on Rosalie's face too well. "Is it so
impossible that I might be able to make a difference in her life? Has
being a cop made you so hard you aren't willing to give someone a
chance to change?" He gripped her hands, hard. "This
isn't about me." "No," she said, and smiled.
"It's not." He swore and let go of her to pace to
the coffee maker. "Okay, point taken. It's none of my business.
But I'm going to ask for a promise." "You can ask." "Don't go out on the streets with
her. Don't go anywhere near Bobby's territory." She thought of the man with the silver
hair and the vicious eyes. "That I can promise. Feel better?" "I'm not through. Don't let her up
here unless you're sure she's alone. Meet her down at your office, or
in some public place." "Really, Alexi…" "Please." She said nothing for a moment, and
then, because she could see how much it had cost him to use that
word, she relented. "All right." Bess scooted away from the
counter, then opened the bread drawer. "Want a bagel?" "Sure." She popped two into the toaster oven
before going to the refrigerator for cream cheese. "There's
something I should tell you." "I'm hoping there's a lot of
things." With a puzzled smile, she turned back.
"I'm sorry?" "I want to know about this
personal life of yours, McNee. I want to know all about you, then I
want to take you to bed and make love with you until we both forget
our own names." "Ah…" It didn't seem
to take more than one of those long, level looks of his to make her
forget a great deal more than her name. "Anyway…" "Anyway?" he repeated
helpfully as the toaster oven dinged. "I was going to tell you about
Angie Horowitz." The lazy smile vanished. His eyes went
cool and flat. "What do you know about her?" "Boy, it really does click off,"
Bess murmured. "I feel like I just stepped into one of those
rooms with the two-way mirror and the rubber hoses." "Angie Horowitz," he
repeated. "What do you know about her?" "I don't know much of anything,
but I thought I should tell you what Rosalie told me." She got
out plates, then began to spread the bagels generously. "She
said that Angie was really happy to have hooked up with this one guy.
He'd hired her a couple of times and slipped her some extra money.
Treated her well, promised her some presents. In fact, he gave her
this little pendant. A gold heart with a crack down the center." Alex's face remained impassive. There
had been a broken neck chain wrapped in Angie's hand when they found
her, just as there had been with the first victim. That little detail
had been kept out of the press. There hadn't been a heart, he thought
now. But someone had broken the chain for a reason. "She wore it all the
time—according to Rosalie," Bess went on. "Rosalie
also told me Mary Rodell had one just like it. She was the other
victim, wasn't she?" she asked Alex. "She had it on the
last time Rosalie saw her alive." "Is that it?" Bess was disappointed that he wasn't
more pleased with the information. "There's a little more."
Sulking a bit, she bit into her bagel. "Angie called the guy
Jack, and she bragged to Rosalie that he was a real gentleman, and
was built like…" She trailed off, cleared her throat, but
her eyes were bright with humor, rather than embarrassment. "Women
have colorful terms for certain things, just like men." "I get the picture." "He had a scar." "What kind?" "I don't know. A scar, on his hip.
Angie told Rosalie he got upset when she asked him about it. That's
all she told me, Alexi, but I figured the coincidence of the
pendants, you might want to know about this guy." "It never hurts." He gave her
an easy smile, though his instincts were humming. "Probably
nothing, but I'll look into it." He tugged on her hair. "Do
yourself a favor, and don't tell Rosalie you passed this along to
me." "I'm softhearted, Detective. Not
softheaded. She thinks you have a really nice butt—but you're
still a cop." He grimaced. "I don't think I like
you discussing my anatomy with a—" "Friend," she supplied, with
a warning lift of her brow. "I also had lunch with your sister.
We discussed your nasty temperament." "I heard." He stole her
bagel. "Radcliffe, huh?" "So?" "So nothing. Want to go dancing
with me?" She debated with herself for almost a
full second. "Okay. Tonight?" "Can't. Tomorrow?" It meant canceling dinner at Le Cirque
with L. D. Strater. That debate took nearly half a second. "That's
fine. Sexy or sedate?" "Sexy. Definitely." "Good. Why don't you come by
around—" She glanced at the clock, stared, then yelped.
"Damn it! Now I'm going to be late. I'll owe Lori twenty dollars
if I'm late one more time this month." She began pushing Alex
out of the kitchen. "It's all your fault. Now beat it, so I can
throw on some clothes and get out of here." "Since you're already late…"
He had some very good moves. Even as she shoved him toward the door,
he was turning to catch her close. "I can arrange it so you're a
lot later." "Smooth talker," she said
with a laugh. "Take a hike." "You've already lost twenty. I'm
just offering to make it worth your while." "I don't know how I can resist
that incredibly romantic gesture, but somehow I find I have the
strength." "You want romance?" There was
a gleam in his eyes as he headed for the door. "Tomorrow night.
We'll just see how strong you are."
Chapter 6
Contents - Prev/Next After spending most of the morning
kicking his heels in , court, waiting to testify in an assault case,
Alex returned to the station to find his partner hip-deep in
paperwork. "The boss wants to see you," Judd said through a
mouthful of chocolate bar. "Right." Alex shrugged out of
his jacket and dragged off his court-appearance tie. With his free
hand, he picked up his pile of messages. "I think he meant now," Judd
said helpfully. "I got it." As he passed
Judd's desk, Alex peeked over his shoulder at the report in the
typewriter. "Two p's in apprehend, Einstein." Judd backspaced and scowled. "You
sure?" "Trust me." He swung through
the squad room and knocked on Captain Trilwaiter's glass door. "Come." Trilwalter glanced up. If Alex often
thought he was swamped in paperwork, it was nothing compared to what
surrounded his captain. Trilwalter's desk was heaped with it. The
overflowing files, stacks of reports and correspondence gave
Trilwalter a bookish, accountantlike look. This was enhanced by the
half glasses perched on his long, narrow nose, the slightly balding
head and the ruthlessly knotted knit tie. But Alex knew better. Trilwalter was a
cop down to the bone, and he might still be on the street but for the
bullet that had damaged his left lung. "You wanted to see me, Captain?" "Stanislaski." Trilwalter
crooked his finger, then pointed it, gesturing to Alex to come in and
shut the door. He leaned back in his chair, folded his hands over his
flat belly and scowled. "What the hell is all this about
soap operas?" "Sir?" "Soap operas," Trilwalter
repeated. "I just had a call from the mayor." Testing his ground, Alex nodded slowly.
"The mayor called you about soap operas?" "You look confused, Detective."
A rare, and not entirely humor-filled, smile curved Trilwaiter's
mouth. "That makes two of us. The name McNee mean anything to
you? Bess McNee?" Alex closed his eyes a moment. "Oh,
boy." "Rings a bell, does it?" "Yes, sir." Alex gave himself
a brief moment to contemplate murder. "Miss McNee and I have a
personal relationship. Sort of." "I'm not interested in your
personal relationship, sort of or otherwise. Unless they come across
my desk." "When I arrested her—" "Arrested her?" Trilwalter
held up one hand while he took off his glasses. Slowly, methodically,
he massaged the bridge of his nose. "I don't think I have to
know about that. No, I'm sure I don't." Despite himself, Alex began to see the
humor in it. "If I could say so, Captain, Bess tends to
bring that kind of reaction out in a man." "She's a writer?" "Yes, sir. For 'Secret Sins.'" Trilwalter lifted tired eyes. '"Secret
Sins.' Apparently the mayor is quite a fan. Not only a fan,
Detective, but an old chum of your Bess McNee's. Old chum was just
how he put it." Finding discretion in silence, Alex
said nothing as Trilwalter rose. The captain walked to the
watercooler wedged between two file cabinets in the corner of his
office. He poured out a paper cupful and drank it down. "His honor, the mayor, requests
that Miss McNee be permitted to observe a day in your life,
Detective." Alex made a comment normally reserved
for locker rooms and pool halls. Trilwalter nodded sagely. "My sentiments exactly. However,
one of the less appealing aspects of working this particular desk is
playing politics. You lose, Detective." "Captain, we're closing in on that
robbery on Lexington. I've got a new lead on the hooker murders and a
message on my desk from a snitch who could know something about that
stiff we found down on East Twenty-third. How am I supposed to work
with some ditzy woman hanging over my shoulder?" "This is the ditzy woman you have
a personal relationship with?" Alex opened his mouth, then closed it
again. How to explain Bess? "Sort of," he said at length.
"Look, Captain, I already agreed to talk to McNee about police
work, in general, now and again. I never agreed to specifics. I sure
as hell don't want her riding shotgun while I work." "A day in your life, Stanislaski."
With that same grim smile, Trilwalter crushed his cup and tossed it.
"Monday next, to be exact." "Captain—" "Deal with it," Trilwaiter
said. "And see that she stays out of trouble." Dismissed, Alex stalked back to his
desk. He was still muttering to himself when Judd wandered over with
two cups of coffee. "Problem?" "Women," Alex said. "Tell me about it." Because
he'd been waiting all mom-ing for the chance, Judd sat on the edge of
Alex's desk. "Speaking of women, did you know that Bess was
engaged to L. D. Strater?" Alex's head snapped up. "What?" "Used to be," Judd explained.
"One of the teachers at Holly's school's a real gossip-gatherer.
Reads all the tabloids and stuff. She was telling Holly how Strater
and Bess were a thing a few months ago." "Is that so?" Alex remembered
how they'd danced together at her party. Kissed. His mouth flattened
into a grim line as he lifted the cup. "A real whirlwind sort of
thing—according to my sources. Before that, she was engaged to
Charles Stutman." "Who the hell is that?" "You know, the writer. He's got
that hot play on Broadway now. Dust to Dust. Holly really wants to
see it. I thought maybe Bess could wangle some tickets." The sound Alex made was neither
agreement nor denial. It was more of a growl. "Then there was George
Collaway—you know, the son of that big publisher? That was
about three years ago, but he married someone else." "The lady gets around," Alex
said softly. "Yeah, and in top circles. And,
hey, Holly was really blown away when she found out that Bess was
Roger K. McNee's daughter. You know, the camera guy." "Camera guy?" Alex repeated,
feeling a hole spreading in the pit of his stomach. "As in
McNee-Holden?" "Yeah. First camera I ever bought
was a Holden 500. Use their film all the time, too. Hell, so does the
department. Well." He straightened. "If you get a chance,
maybe you could ask Bess about those tickets. It sure would mean a
lot to Holly." McNee-Holden. Alex ran the names over
in his head while the noise of the squad room buzzed around him. For
God's sake, he had one of their cameras himself. He'd bought their
little red packs of film hundreds of times over the years. The
department used their developing paper. He was pretty sure NASA did
too. Wasn't Bess just full of secrets! So she was rich. Filthy rich. He picked
up his messages again, telling himself it wasn't such a big deal.
Wouldn't have been, he corrected silently, if she'd told him about it
herself. Engaged, he thought with a frown. Three
times engaged. Shrugging, he picked up the phone. None of his
business, he reminded himself as he punched in numbers. If she'd been
married three times, it would be none of his business. He was taking
her dancing, not on a honeymoon. But it was a long time before he was
able to shuffle her into a back corner of his mind and get on with
his job. Sexy, the man had said, Bess
remembered, turning in front of her cheval glass. It looked as though
she were going to oblige him. Snug teal silk hugged every curve and
ended abruptly at midthigh. Over the strapless, unadorned bodice, she
wore a short, body jacket of fuchsia. Long, wand-shaped crystals
dangled at her ears. After stepping into her heels, she gave her hair
a last fluff. She felt like dancing. When her buzzer sounded, she grinned at
her reflection. Leave it to a cop to be right on time. Grabbing her
purse—a small one that bulged with what she considered the
essentials—she hurried to the intercom. "I'll come down. Hold on." She found him on the sidewalk, looking
perfect in gray slacks and a navy shirt. His hands were tucked in the
pockets of his bomber jacket. "Hi." She kissed him lightly,
then tucked an arm through his. "Where are we going?" It gave him a jolt, the way their eyes
and mouths lined up. As they would if they were in bed. "Downtown,"
he said shortly, and steered her left toward the corner to catch a
cab. . He couldn't have pleased her more with
his choice of the noisy, crowded club. The moment she stepped inside,
Bess's blood started to hum. The music was loud, the dancing in full
swing. They squeezed up to the bar to wait for a table. "Vodka, rocks," Alex ordered,
raising his voice over the din. "Two," Bess decided, and
smiled at him. "I think I was here before, a few months ago." "I wouldn't be surprised."
Not his business, Alex reminded himself. Her background, the men in
her life. None of it. The hell it wasn't. "It doesn't look like the kind of
place Strater would bring you." "L.D.?" Her eyes laughed.
"No, not his style." She angled herself around. "I
love to watch people dance, don't you? It's one of the few legal
forms of exhibitionism in this country." When he handed her her
drink, she murmured a thank-you. "Take that guy there." She
gestured with the glass at a man who was strutting on the floor,
thumbs in his belt loops, hips wiggling. "That's definitely one
of the standard urban white male mating dances." "Did you do a lot of dancing with
Stutman?" Alex heard himself ask. "Charlie?" She sampled the
vodka, pursed her lips. "Not really. He was more into sitting in
some smoky club listening to esoteric music that he could obsess to."
Still scanning the crowd, she caught the eye of a man in black
leather. He cocked a brow and started toward her. One hard look from
Alex, and he veered away. , Bess chuckled into her glass. "That
put him in his place." Rattling her ice, she grinned up at him.
"Were you born with that talent, or did you have to develop it?" Alex plucked the glass out of her hand
and set it aside. "Let's dance." Always willing to dance, Bess let him
pull her onto the floor. But instead of bopping to the beat, he
wrapped his arms around her. While legs flashed and arms waved around
them, and the music rocked, they glided. "Nice." Smiling into his
eyes, she linked her arms around his neck. "I see why you like
to make your own moves, Detective." "I believe I promised you
romance." He skimmed his lips over her jaw to her ear. "Yes." Her breath came out
slow and warm as she closed her eyes. "You did." "I'm not sure what a woman like
you considers romantic." Her skin shivered under his lips. "This
is a good start." "It's tough." He drew away so
that their lips were an inch apart. "It's tough for a cop to
compete with tycoons and playwrights." Her eyes were half-closed and dreamy
through her lashes. "What are you talking about?" "A couple of your former fiances." The lashes lifted fractionally. "What
about them?" "I wondered when you were going to
mention them. Or the fact that your father runs one of the biggest
conglomerates known to man. Or the little detail about your chum the
mayor calling my captain." They continued to dance as he spoke,
but Bess could see the anger building in his eyes. "Do you want
to take them as separate issues, or all in one piece?" She was a cool one, he thought. He was
feeling anything but cool. "Why don't we start with the mayor?
You had no right." "I didn't ask him to call, Alexi."
She spoke carefully, feeling the taut strength of his fingers at her
waist. "We were having dinner, and—" "You often have dinner with the
mayor?" "He's an old family friend,"
she said patiently. "I was telling him how helpful you'd been,
and one thing led to another. I didn't know he'd called your captain
until after it was done. I admit I liked the idea, and if it's caused
you any trouble, I'm sorry." "Great." "My work's as important to me as
yours is to you," she shot back, struggling with her own temper.
"If you'd prefer, I can arrange to spend Monday observing
another cop." "You'll spend Monday where I can
keep my eye on you." "Fine. Excuse me." She broke
away and worked her way through the crowd to the rest room. The music
pulsed against the walls as she paced the small room, ignoring the
charter from the two women freshening their lipstick at the mirror.
Losing her temper would be unproductive, she reminded herself.
Better, much better, to handle this situation calmly, coolly. When she was almost sure she could, she
walked back out. He was waiting for her. Taking her arm,
he led her to a table in the rear, where they could talk without
shouting. "I think we should go. There's no
use staying when you're so angry with me," she began, but he
merely scraped back her chair. "Sit." She sat. "When were you going to tell me
about your family?" "I don't see it as an issue."
And that was true enough. "Why should it be? This is only the
second time we've gone out." The look he sent her had her jiggling a
foot under the table. "You know damn well there's more going on
between us than a couple of dates." "All right, yes, I do." She
picked up her drink, then set it down again, untouched. "But
that's not the point. You're acting as though I deliberately hid
something from you, or lied. That's just not true." He picked up the fresh drink he'd
ordered. "So tell me now." "What? Didn't you run a make on
me?" His narrowed eyes gave her some small sense of
satisfaction. "Okay, Detective, I'll fill you in since you're so
interested. My family owns McNee-Holden, which, since its inception
in 1873, has expanded from still cameras and film to movies,
television, satellites, and all manner of things. Shall I have them
send you a prospectus?" "Don't get smart." "I'm just warming up." She
hooked an arm over the back of her chair. "My father heads the
company, and my mother entertains and does good works. I'm an only
child, who was born rather late in life to them. My father's name is
Roger, and he enjoys a racketing good game of polo. My mother's name
is Susan—never Sue or Susie—and she prefers a challenging
rubber of bridge. What else would you like to know?" Despite his temper, he wanted to take
her hand and soothe her. "Damn it, Bess, it isn't an
interrogation." "Isn't it? Let me make it easy for
you, Alexi. I was born in New York, spent the early part of my
childhood on our estate on Long Island, in the care of a very British
nanny I was extremely fond of, before going off to boarding school.
Which I detested. This, however, left my mother free to pursue her
many charitable causes, and my father free to pursue his business. We
are not close. From time to time we did travel together, but I was
not a pretty child, nor a tractable one, and my parents usually left
my care up to the servants." "Bess—" "I'm not finished." Her eyes
were hard and bright. "This isn't a poor-little-rich-girl story,
Alexi. I wasn't neglected or unhappy. Since I had no more in common
with my parents than they had with me, I was content to go my own
way. They don't interfere, and we get along very well. Because I
prefer making my own way, I don't trumpet the fact that I'm Roger K.
McNee's little girl. I don't hide it, either—otherwise, I would
have changed my name. It's simply a fact. Satisfied?" He took her hand before she could rise.
His voice was calm again, and too gentle to resist. "I wanted to
know who you are. I have feelings for you, so it matters." Slowly her hand relaxed under his. The
hard gleam faded from her eyes. "I understand that someone with
your background would feel that their family, who and what they came
from, are part of what they are. I don't feel that way about myself." "Where you come from means
something, Bess." "Where you are means more. What
does your father do?" "He's a carpenter." "Why aren't you a carpenter?" "Because it wasn't what I wanted."
He drummed his fingers on the table as he studied her. "Your
point," he acknowledged. "Look, I'm sorry I pushed. It was
just weird hearing all this from Judd." "From Judd?" "He got it from Holly, who got it
from some other teacher who reads the tabloids." Even as he said
it, it struck him as ridiculous. He grinned. "See?" Relaxed again, she
leaned forward. "Life really is a soap opera." "Yours is. Three ex-fiance's?" "That depends on how you count."
She took Alex's hand, because she liked the feel of it in hers. "I
wasn't engaged to L.D. He did give me a ring, and I didn't have the
heart to tell him it was ostentatious. But marriage wasn't
discussed." "One of the ten richest men in the
country gave you an ostentatious ring, but marriage wasn't
discussed?" "That's right. He's a very nice
man—a little pompous, sometimes, but who wouldn't be, with so
many people ready to grovel? Can we get some chips or something?" "Sure." He signaled to a
waitress. "So you didn't want to marry him." "I never thought about it."
Since he asked, she did so now. "No, I don't think I would have
liked it very much. He wouldn't have either. L.D. finds me amusing
and a little unconventional. Being a tycoon isn't all fun and games,
you know." "If you say so." She chuckled. "But he'd prefer a
different type for his next wife." She dived in immediately when
the waitress set baskets of chips and pretzels on the table. "I
enjoyed being in love with him for a few weeks, but it wasn't the
romance of the century." "What about the other one, the
writer?" "Charlie." There was a trace
of wistfulness now. "I was really stuck on Charlie. He has this
kind of glow about him. He's so interested in people, in emotions, in
motivations." She gestured with half a pretzel. "The thing
about Charlie is, he's good. Deep-down good. Entirely too good for
me." She finished off the pretzel. "See,
I do things like join Greenpeace. Charlie flies to Alaska to help
clean up oil spills. He's committed. That's why Gabrielle is perfect
for him." "Gabrielle?" "His wife. They met at a whale
rally. They've been married almost two years now." Alex was determined to get it right.
"You were engaged to a married man?'' "No." Insulted, she poked out
her lip. "Of course not. He got married after we were
engaged—that is, after we weren't engaged anymore. Charlie
would never cheat on Gabrielle. He's too decent." "Sorry. My mistake." He
considered changing the subject, but this one was just too
fascinating. "How about George? Was he between Charlie and
Strater?" "No, George was before Charlie and
after Troy. Practically in another life." "Troy? There was another one?" "Oh, you didn't know about him."
She propped her chin on her hand. "I guess your source didn't
dig back far enough. Troy was while I was in college, and we weren't
engaged for very long. Only a couple of weeks Hardly counts." Alex picked up his drink again.
"Hardly." "Anyway, George was a
mistake—though I'd never admit it to Lori. She gloats." "George was a mistake? The others
weren't?" She shook her head. "Learning
experiences. But George, well… I was a little rash with him. I
felt sorry for him, because he was always sure he was coming down
with some terminal illness, and he'd been in therapy since
kindergarten. We should never have gotten involved romantically. I
was really relieved when he decided to marry Nancy instead." "Is this like a hobby?" Alex
asked after a moment. "No, people plan hobbies. I never
plan to fall in love. It just happens." Her smile was amused and
tolerant. "It feels good, and when it's over, no one's hurt. It
isn't a sexual thing, like with Vicki. She goes from man to man
because of the sense of sexual power it gives her. I know most people
think if you have a relationship with a man—particularly if
you're engaged to him—you must be sleeping with him. But it's
not always true." "And if you're not engaged to
him?" Because the question demanded it, she
met his eyes levelly. "Every situation has its own rules. I
don't know what they are for this one yet." "Things may get serious." There was a slight pressure around her
heart. "That's always a possibility." "They're serious enough right now
for me to ask if you're seeing anyone else." She knew it was happening. Bess had
never been able to prevent that slow, painless slide into love. "Are
you asking me if I am, or are you asking me not to?" It wasn't painless for him. It was
terrifying. With what strength of will he had left, Alex held himself
on that thin, shaky edge. "I'm asking you not to. And I'm
telling you that I don't want anyone else. I can't even think of
anyone else." Her eyes were warm as she leaned over
to touch her lips to his. "There is no one else." He laid a hand on her cheek to keep her
mouth on his for another moment. Even as he kissed her, he wondered
how many other men had heard her say those same words. He told himself he was a jealous idiot.
With an effort, he managed to smother the feeling. Rising, he took
her hands and pulled her to her feet. "We're supposed to be dancing." "So I was told. Alexi."
Snuggling into love as she would have into a cozy robe, she cupped
his face in her hands. "What?" "I'm just looking. I want to make
sure you're not mad at me anymore." "I'm not mad at you." To
prove it, he kissed the tip of her crooked nose. No, not angry, she thought, searching
his eyes. But there was something else shadowed there. She couldn't
quite identify it. "My middle name's Louisa." With a half smile on his lips, he
tilted his head. "Okay." "I'm trying to think if there's
something else you might want to know that I haven't told you."
Needing to be close, she rested her cheek against his. "I really
don't have any secrets." He turned his face into her hair. God,
what was she doing to him to tie him up in knots like this? He pulled
her against him, wrapping his arms tight around her. "I know all
I need to know," he said quietly. "We're going to have to
figure out those rules, Bess. We're going to have to figure them out
fast." "Okay." She wasn't sure what
was holding her back. It would have been so easy to hurry out of the
club with him, to go home and be with him. Her body was straining for
him. And yet… The first tremor of panic shocked her
enough to have her pull back and smile, too brightly. She wasn't
afraid, she assured herself. And she didn't need to overanalyze. When
the time was right to move forward, she'd know it. That was all. "Come on, Detective." Still
smiling, she pulled him away from the table. "Let's see if you
can keep up with me on the dance floor."
Chapter 7
Contents - Prev/Next Alex read over a particularly grisly
autopsy report on half of a suspected murder-suicide, and tried to
ignore the fact that Bess was sitting in a chair to his right,
scribbling in her notebook. She was as good as her word, he was
forced to admit. Though she did tend to mumble to herself now and
again, she was quiet, unobtrusive, and once she'd realized he
wouldn't answer her questions—much less acknowledge her
presence—she'd directed them to Judd. He couldn't say she was a problem. But,
of course, she was a problem. She was there. And because she was
there, he thought about her. She'd even dressed quietly, in
bone-colored slacks and a navy blazer. As if, he thought, the
conservative clothes would help her fade into the background and make
him forget she was bothering him. Fat chance, when he was aware of
her in every cell. He could smell her, couldn't he? he
thought, seething with resentment. That fresh and seductive scent had
been floating at the edges of his senses all morning. Sneaking into
his brain the way a good second-story man sneaks through a window. And he could sense her, too. He didn't
need a cop's instincts to know she was behind him, to picture those
big green eyes drawing a bead on his every move. To imagine those
never-still hands making notes, or that soft, agile mouth curving
when a fresh idea came to her. She could have dressed in cardboard and
made him needy. He was so damn cute, Bess was thinking,
smiling at the back of his head. She enjoyed watching him work—the
way he scooped his hand through all that gorgeous black hair when he
was trying to think. Or shifted the phone from one ear to the other
so that he could take notes. The sound of his voice, clipped and
no-nonsense or sly and persuasive, depending on what he wanted from
the listener. And she particularly enjoyed the way he
moved his shoulders, restlessly, annoyance in every muscle, when he
became too aware of her presence. She had a terrific urge to press a kiss
to the back of his neck—and to see what he was reading. After a couple of scowls from him, she
scooted her chair back and stopped peeking over his shoulder. She was cooperating fully, Alex was
forced to admit. Which only made it worse. He wanted her to go away.
How could he explain that it was impossible for him to concentrate on
his job when the woman he was falling in love with was watching him
read an autopsy report? "Here you go." Bess gave him
a cup of coffee and a friendly smile. "You look like you could
use it." "Thanks." Cream, no sugar, he
noted as he sipped. She'd remembered. Was that part of her appeal? he
wondered. The fact that she absorbed those little details about
people? "You must be getting bored." Taking a chance, she sat on the edge of
his desk. "Why?" "Nothing much going on." He
gestured to indicate the pile of paperwork. Maybe, just maybe, he
could convince her she was wasting her time. "If you have your
TV cop doing this, it isn't going to up your ratings." "We'll want to show different
aspects of his work." She broke a candy bar in half and offered
Alex a share. "Like the fact that he'd have to concentrate and
handle this sort of paperwork and detail in the middle of all this
chaos." He took a bite. "What chaos?" She smiled again, jotting down notes.
He didn't even see it any longer, she realized. Or hear it. All the
noise, the movement, the rush. Dozens of little dramas had taken
place that morning, fascinating her, unnoted by him. "They brought a drug dealer in
over there." She gestured with a nod as she continued to write.
"Skinny guy in a white fedora and striped jacket, wearing a
heavy dose of designer cologne." "Pasquale," Alex said, noting
the description. "So?" "You saw him?" "I smelled him." He shrugged.
"Wasn't my collar." Chuckling to herself, Bess crossed her
legs and got comfortable. "A Korean shopkeeper came rushing in
shouting about vandalism at his store. He was so excited he lost most
of his English. They sent out for an interpreter." "Yeah, it happens." What was
her point? he wondered. She only smiled and finished her
chocolate. "Right after that, they brought in a woman who'd been
knocked around by her boyfriend. She was sitting over there—defending
him, even while her face was swelling. The detective at the far end
had a fight with his wife over the phone. He forgot their
anniversary." "Must have been Rogers. He's
always fighting with his wife." Impatience rippled back. "What's
that got to do with anything?" "Atmosphere," she told him.
"You've stopped noticing it and become a part of it. It's
interesting to see. And you're very organized," she added,
licking chocolate from her thumb. "Not like Judd over there,
with all his neat little piles, but in the way you spread things out
and know just where to find the right piece of paper at the right
time." "I hate having you stare at me
when I work." He slapped her hand away from the autopsy report. "I know." Unoffended, she
grinned. She leaned a little closer. There was something in her eyes
besides humor, he noted. He wasn't sure if he'd ever seen desire and
amusement merged in the same expression before. And he certainly
hadn't realized how the combination could make a man's blood hum.
"You look very sexy plowing your way through all this, gun
strapped to your side, your hair all messed up from raking your
fingers through it. That keen, dangerous look in your eyes." Mortified, he shifted in his chair.
"Cut it out, McNee." "I like the way your eyes get all
dark and intense when you're taking down some important tidbit of
information over the phone." "For all you know, that was my dry
cleaner." "Uh-uh." She took his coffee
to wash down the last bite of candy bar. "Tell me something,
Alexi. Are you annoyed that I'm here, or are you nervous that I'm
here?" "Both." He rose. There must
be something he had to do someplace else. "That's what I thought." She
hooked a finger around the strap of his holster. She wasn't afraid of
the gun he wore. In fact, she was counting on talking him into
letting her hold it one day. So that she could see how it felt. How
he felt when he was forced to draw it. "You know, you haven't
even kissed me." "I'm not going to kiss you. Here." She lifted her eyes, slowly. There was
a definite dare in them. "Why not?" "Because the next time I kiss
you—" watching her, he slid a hand around her throat, his
thumb caressing her collarbone, until her cocky smile faded away
"—really kiss you, it's just going to be you and me.
Alone. And I'm going to keep right on kissing you, and all sorts of
other things, until there aren't any more rules. Any more reasons." Was that what she wanted? She thought
it was. Right now, when her skin was humming where his fingers lay,
she thought it was exactly what she wanted. But there was something
else, some complex mixture of yearning and fear, so unfamiliar it
caused her to step back. "What's wrong, McNee?"
Delighted by her reaction, he let his hand slide down her shoulder
and away. "Who's making who nervous now?" "We're supposed to be working,"
she reminded him. "Not making each other nervous." "Today, when I go off the clock,
so do you." "Stanislaski." Alex's eyes stayed on hers another
moment before flicking behind her. "Captain." "Sorry to interrupt your social
hour," he said sourly. "I need that report." "Right here." Even as Alex
was turning to reach for it, Bess was offering her hand to
Trilwalter. "Captain, it's so nice to meet
you. I'm Bess McNee. I wanted to let you know how much I appreciate
the department's cooperation today." Trilwalter scowled at her a moment,
then, remembering, stifled a sigh. "Right. You're the writer."
A sneer twisted his mouth. "Soap operas." "Yes, I am." Her smile made
the fluorescents overhead dim. "I wonder… if I can have
just a moment of your time? I know you're very busy, so I won't keep
you." He didn't want any part of her. He knew
it, she knew it, and so did any of the cops hovering close enough to
hear. But riding a desk had taught him that diplomacy was often his
only weapon. Besides, once he made his feelings known, she'd be out
of his hair and off finding another precinct to haunt. "Why don't you come into my
office, Ms. McNee?" "Thank you." She shot a grin
over her shoulder at Alex as she followed Trilwalter. "You going to let her go in there
alone?" Judd murmured. "Yeah." Alex bit back a
chuckle as he heard the glass of Trilwalter's door rattle. "Oh,
yeah. And I'm going to enjoy it." Ten minutes later, Alex was surprised
by a burst of laughter. Swiveling in his chair, he spotted Trilwalter
leading Bess out of his office. The two of them were chuckling
together like two old friends over a private joke. "I'm going to remember that one,
Bess." "Just don't tell the mayor where
you heard it." "I know how to respect a source."
Still smiling, he glanced over at a slack-jawed Alex. "Detective,
you take care of Ms. McNee. Make sure she gets what she needs." "Sir." He cut his eyes over
to Bess. She merely batted her lashes, managing to look about as
innocent as a smoking gun. "I have every intention of making
certain Ms. McNee gets exactly what she needs." Bess laid her hand in Trilwalter's.
"Thank you again, Donald." "My pleasure. Don't be a
stranger." "Donald?" Alex said, the
moment the captain was out of earshot. "Yes." Bess made a production
out of brushing dust from her sleeve. "That is his name." "We use several other names for
him around here. What the hell did you do in there?" "Why, we chatted. What else?" Glancing over her shoulder, Alex
noticed money changing hands. The odds had been even that Trilwalter
would chew her up, then spit her out, within ten minutes. Since he'd
lost twenty on the deal himself, Alex wasn't particularly pleased. "Sit down and be quiet," he
told her. "I've got work." "Of course." Before she could take her seat, his
phone rang. "Stanislaski. Yeah." He listened a moment, then
pulled out his notepad to scribble. "I hear you. You know how it
works, Boomer. It depends on what it's worth." Nodding to
himself, he replaced the pad. "Yeah, we'll talk. I'll be there.
In ten." When Alex hung up the phone and grabbed
for his jacket, Bess was right behind him. "What is it?" "I've got someplace to go. Judd,
let's hit it." "I'm going with you." Alex didn't even glance back as he
started out. He was already working on tucking her in some far corner
of his mind. "Forget it." "I'm going with you," she
repeated, and snagged his arm. "That's the deal." It surprised him when he tried to shake
her off and she wouldn't shake. The lady had a good grip, he noted.
"I didn't make any deal." She could be just as tough and
cold-blooded as he, she thought. She planted her feet, angled her
chin. "Your captain did. I ride with you, Detective, wherever
you may be going. A day in the life, remember?" "Fine." Frustration vibrated
through him as he stared her down. "You ride—and you stay
in the car. No way you're scaring off my snitch." "Want me to drive?" Judd
offered as they headed down the steps to the garage. "No." Alex's answer was flat
and left no room for argument. Judd sent Bess a good-natured shrug.
Then, because Alex made no move to do so, he opened the back door of
their nondescript unmarked car for her. "Where are we going?" Bess
asked, determined to be pleasant. "To talk to the scum of the
earth," Alex shot back as he pulled out of the garage. "Sounds fascinating," Bess
said, and meant it. She didn't think she'd ever been in
this part of town before. Many of the shop windows were boarded up.
Those still in business were grubbier than usual. People still walked
as though they were in a hurry, but it didn't look as if they had
anyplace to go. Funny, she thought, how Alex seemed to
blend with the surroundings. It wasn't simply the jeans and battered
jacket he wore, or the hair he'd deliberately mussed. It was a look
in the eyes, a set of the body, a twist of the mouth. No one would
look twice at him, she thought. Or if they bothered, they wouldn't
see a cop, they'd see another street tough obviously on the edge of
his luck. Taking her cue from him, she pulled out
her bag of cosmetics, darkening her mouth, adding just a little too
much eyeliner and shadow. She tried a couple of bored looks in the
mirror of her compact and decided to tease up her hair. Alex glanced back at her and scowled.
"What the hell are you doing to your face?" "Getting into character," she
said blithely. "Just like you. Are we going to bust somebody?" He only turned away and muttered. Just his luck, he thought. He wanted to
slip into Boomer's joint unobtrusively, and he was stuck with a
redhead who thought they were playing cops and robbers. Unoffended, Bess put away her mirror
and scanned the area. Parking wasn't a problem here. Bess decided
that if anyone left his car unattended in this neighborhood for above
ten minutes, he'd come back and be lucky to find a hubcap. Alex swung over the curb and swore. He
couldn't leave her in the car here, damn it. Any of the hustlers or
junkies on the streets would take one look, then eat her alive. "You listen to me." He
turned, leaning over the seat to make his point. "Stay close to
me, and keep your mouth shut. No questions, no comments." "All right, but where—" "No questions." He slammed
out of his door, then waited for her. With his hand firm on her arm,
he hauled her to the sidewalk. "If you step out of line, I
swear, I'll slap the cuffs on you." "Romantic, isn't he?" she
said to Judd. "Just sends shivers down my spine." "Keep a lid on it, McNee,"
Alex told her, refusing to be amused. He pulled her through a grimy
door into an airless shop. It took her a minute to get her
bearings in the dim light. There were shelves and shelves crowded
with dusty merchandise. Radios, picture frames, kitchenware. A tuba.
A huge glass display counter with a diagonal crack across it
dominated one wall. Security glass ran to the ceiling. Cutting
through it was a window, like a bank teller's, studded with bars. "A pawnshop," Bess said, with
such obvious delight that Alex snarled at her. "One word about atmosphere, I'll
clobber you." But she was already dragging out her
notebook. "Go ahead, do what you have to do. You won't even know
I'm here." Sure, he thought. How would anyone know
she was there, simply because that sunshine scent of her cut right
through the grime and must? He stepped up to the counter just as a
scrawny man in a loose white shirt came through the rear door. "Stanislaski." "Boomer. What have you got for
me?" Grinning, Boomer passed a hand over his
heavily greased black hair. "Come on, I got some good stuff, and
you know I make a point of cooperating with the law. But a man's got
to make a living." "You make one ripping off every
poor slob who walks through the door." "Aw, now you hurt my feelings."
Boomer's pale blue eyes glittered. "Rookie?" he asked,
nodding at Judd. "He used to be." After an appraising look, Boomer
glanced over at Bess. She was busy poking through his merchandise.
"Looks like I got me a customer. Hang on." "She's with me." Alex shot
him a knife-edged look that forestalled any questions. "Just
forget she's here." Boomer had already appraised the trio
of rings on Bess's right hand, and the blue topaz drops at her cars.
He sighed his disappointment. "You're the boss, Stanislaski. But
listen, I like to be discreet." Alex leaned on the counter, like a man
ready to shoot the bull for hours. His voice was soft, and deadly.
"Jerk my chain, Boomer, and I'm going to have to come down here
and take a hard look at what you keep in that back room." "Stock. Just stock." But he
grinned. He didn't have any illusions about Alex. Boomer knew when he
was detested, but he also knew they had an agreement of sorts. And,
thus far, it had been advantageous to both of them. "I got
something on those hookers that got sliced up." Though his expression didn't change,
though he didn't move a muscle, Alex went on alert. "What kind
of something?" Boomer merely smiled and rubbed his
thumb and forefinger together. When Alex drew out a twenty, it
disappeared quickly through the bars. "Twenty more, if you like
what I have to say." "If it's worth it, you'll get it." "You know I trust you."
Smelling of hair grease and sweat, Boomer leaned closer. "Word
on the street is you're looking for some high roller. Guy's name's
Jack." "So far I'm not impressed." "Just building up to it, pal. The
first one that was wasted? She was one of Big Ed's wives. I
recognized her from the newspaper picture. Now, she was fine-looking.
Not that I ever used her services." "Turn the page, Boomer." "Okay, okay." He shot a grin
at Judd. "He don't like conversation. I heard both those
unfortunate ladies were in possession of a certain piece of jewelry." "You've got good ears." "Man in my position hears things.
It so happens I had a young lady come in just yesterday. She had a
certain piece of jewelry she wanted to exchange." Opening a
drawer, Boomer pulled out a thin gold chain. Dangling from it was a
heart, cracked down the center. When Alex held out a hand, Boomer
shook his head. "I gave her twenty for it." Saying nothing, Alex pulled another
bill out of his wallet. "Seems to me I'm entitled to a
certain amount of profit." Eyes steady, Alex pulled the twenty
back an inch. "You're entitled to go in and answer a bunch of
nasty questions down at the cop shop." With a shrug, Boomer exchanged the bill
for the heart. He'd only given ten for it, in any case. "She
wasn't much more than a kid," Boomer added. "Eighteen,
maybe twenty at a stretch. Still pretty. Bottle blonde, blue eyes.
Little mole right here." He tapped beside his left eyebrow. "Got an address?" "Well, now…" "Twenty for the address, Boomer."
Alex's tone told the man to take it. "That's it." Satisfied, Boomer named a hotel a few
blocks away. "Signed her name Crystal," he added, wanting
to keep the partnership intact. "Crystal LaRue. Figure she made
it up." "Let's check it out," he said
to Judd, then tapped Bess on the shoulder. She was apparently
absorbed in an ugly brass lamp in the shape of a rearing horse.
"Let's go." "In a minute." She turned a
smile on Boomer. "How much?" "Oh, for you—" "Forget it." Alex was
dragging her to the door. "I want to buy—" "It's ugly." Annoyed at the loss, but pleased to
have recorded the entire conversation, she sighed. "That's the
point." But she climbed meekly into the car and began to
scribble her impressions in her book. Cramped shop. Very dirty. Mostly junk.
Excellent place for props. Proprietor a complete sleaze. Alexi in
complete control of exchange—a kind of game-playing. Quietly
disgusted but willing to use the tools at hand. By the time she'd finished scribbling,
Alex was pulling to the curb again. "Same rules," he said to Bess
as they climbed out of the car. "Absolutely." Lips pursed,
she studied the crumbling hotel. She recognized it as a
rent-by-the-hour special. "Is this where she lives?" "Who?" "The girl you were talking about."
She lifted a brow. "I have ears, too, Alexi." He should have known. "As long as
you keep your mouth shut." "There's no need to be rude,"
she told him as they started in. "Tell you what, just to show
there's no hard feelings, I'll buy you both lunch." "Great." Judd gallantly
opened the door for her. "You're so easy," Alex
muttered to his partner as they entered the filthy lobby. "Hey, we gotta eat sometime." He hated to bring her in here, Alex
realized. Into this dirty place that smelled of garbage and moldy
dreams. How could she be so unaffected by it? he wondered, then
struggled to put thoughts of her aside as he approached the desk
clerk. "You got a Crystal LaRue?" The clerk peered over his newspaper.
There was an un-filtered cigarette dangling from the corner of his
mouth and total disinterest in his eyes. "Don't ask for names." Alex merely pulled out his badge,
flashed it. "Blonde, about eighteen. Good-looking. A beauty mark
beside her eyebrow. Working girl." "Don't ask what they do for a
living, neither." With a shrug, the clerk went back to his
paper. "Two-twelve." "She in?" "Haven't seen her go out." With Bess trailing behind, they started
up the steps. To entertain herself, she read the various tenants'
suggestions and statements that were scrawled on the walls. There was a screaming match in progress
behind one of the doors on the first floor. Someone was banging on
the wall from a neighboring room and demanding—in colorful
terms—that the two opponents quiet down. A bag of garbage had spilled on the
stairs between the second and first floors. It had gone very ripe. Alex rapped on the door of 212, waited.
He rapped again and called out. "Crystal. Need to talk to you." With a glance at Judd, Alex tried the
door. The knob turned easily. "In a place like this, you'd think
she'd lock it," Judd commented. "And wire it with explosives,"
Alex added. He slipped out his gun, and Judd did the same. "Stay
in the hall," he ordered Bess without looking at her. They went
through the door, guns at the ready. She did exactly what she was told. But
that didn't stop her from seeing. Crystal hadn't gone out, and she
wouldn't be walking the streets again. As the door hung open, Bess
stared at what was sprawled across the sagging mattress inside. The
stench of blood—and worse—streamed through the open
doorway. Death. Violent death. She had written
about it, discussed it, watched gleefully as it was acted out for the
cameras. But she'd never seen it face-to-face.
Had never known how completely a human being could be turned into a
thing. From far away, she heard Alex swear,
over and over, but she could only stare, frozen, until his body
blocked her view. He had his hands on her shoulders, squeezing. God,
she was cold, Bess thought. She'd never been so cold. "I want you to go downstairs." She managed to lift her gaze from his
chin to his eyes. The iced fury in them had her shivering. "What?" He nearly swore again. She was white as
a sheet, and her pupils had contracted until they were hardly bigger
than the point of a pin. "Go downstairs, Bess." He tried to
rub the chill out of her arms, knowing he couldn't. "Are you
listening to me?" he said, his voice quiet, gentle. "Yes." She moistened her
lips, pressed them together. "I'm sorry, yes." "Go down, stay in the lobby. Don't
say anything, don't do anything, until Judd or I come down. Okay?"
He gave her a little shake, and wondered what he would do if she
folded on him. "Okay?" She took one shaky breath, then nodded.
"She's… so young." With an effort, she swallowed the
sickness that kept threatening to rise in her throat. "I'm all
right. Don't worry about me. I'm all right," she repeated, then
turned .away to go downstairs. "She shouldn't have seen this,"
Judd said. His own stomach was quivering. "Nobody should see this."
Banking down on every emotion, Alex closed the door at his back. She stuck it out, refusing to budge
when Judd came down to drive her home. After finding an old chair,
she settled into a corner while the business of death went on around
her. From her vantage point, she watched them come and go—forensics,
the police photographer, the morgue. Detached, she studied the people who
crowded in, asking questions, making comments, being shuffled out
again by blank-faced cops. There was grief in her for a girl she
hadn't known, a fury at the waste of a life. But she remained. Not
because of the job. Because of Alex. He was angry with her. She understood
it, and didn't question it. When they were finished at the scene, she
rode in silence in the back of the car. Back at the station, she took
the same chair she'd had that morning. Hours went by, endlessly long. At one
point she slipped out and bought Alex and Judd sandwiches from a
deli. After a time, he went into another room. She followed, still
silent, noted a board with pictures tacked to it. Horrible pictures. She looked away from them, took a chair
and listened while Alex and other detectives discussed the latest
murder and the ongoing investigation. Later, she rode with him back to the
pawnshop. Waited patiently while he questioned Boomer again. Waited
longer while he and Judd returned to the motel to reinterview the
clerk, the tenants. Like them, she learned little about
Crystal LaRue. Her name had been Kathy Segal, and she'd once lived in
Wisconsin. It had been hard, terribly hard, for Bess to listen when
Alex tracked down and notified her parents. Hard, too, to understand
from Alex's end of the conversation that they didn't care. For them,
their daughter had already been dead. She'd been nobody's girl. She'd worked
the streets on her own. Two months after she moved into the tiny
little room with the sagging mattress, she had died there. No one had
known her. No one had wanted to know her. No one had cared. Alex couldn't talk to Bess. It was
impossible for him. Intolerable. He shared this part of his life with
no one who mattered to him. It was true that his sister Rachel saw
some of it as a public defender but as far as Alex was concerned that
was too much. Perhaps that was why he kept all the pieces he could
away from the rest of his family and loved ones. He hated remembering the look on Bess's
face as she'd stood in that doorway. There should have been a way to
protect her from that, to shield her from her own stubbornness. But he hadn't protected her, he hadn't
shielded her, though that was precisely what he had sworn to do for
people he'd never met from the first day he'd worn a badge. Yet for
her, for the woman he was—God, yes, the woman he was in love
with—he'd opened the door himself and let her in. So he didn't talk to her, not even when
it was time to turn it off and go home. And in the silence, his anger
built and swelled and clawed at his guts. He found the words when he
stepped into her apartment and closed the door. "Did you get enough?" Bess was in no mood to fight. Her
emotions, always close to the surface, had been wrung dry by what
she'd seen and heard that day. She would let him yell, if that was
what he needed, but she was tired, she was aching, and her heart went
out to him. "Let me get you a drink," she
said quietly, but he snagged her arm and whirled her back. "Is it all in your notes?"
That cold, terribly controlled fury swiped out at her. "Can you
find a way to use it to entertain those millions of daytime viewers?" "I'm sorry." It was all she
could think of. "Alexi, I'm so sorry." She took a deep
breath. "I want a brandy. I'll get us both one." "Fine. A nice, civilized brandy is
just what we need." She walked away to choose a bottle from
an old lacquered cabinet. "I don't know what you want me to
say." Very carefully, very deliberately, she poured two
snifters. "I'll apologize for choosing today to do this, if that
helps. I'll apologize for making it more difficult for you by being
there when this happened." She brought the snifter to him, but
he didn't take it "Right now, I'd be willing to say anything
you'd like to hear." He couldn't get beyond it, no matter
what she said. He couldn't get beyond knowing he'd opened the door on
the kind of horror she'd never be able to forget. "You had no
business being there. You had no business seeing any of that." With a sigh, she set both snifters
aside. Maybe brandy wouldn't help after all. "You were there.
You saw it." His eyes flashed white heat. "It's
my damn job." "I know." She lifted a hand
to his cheek, soothing. "I know." Compelled, he grabbed her wrist, held
tight a moment before he turned away. "I don't want you touched
by it. I don't want you touched by it ever again." "I can't promise that."
Because it was her way, she wrapped her arms around his waist, rested
her cheek against his back. He was rigid as steel, unyielding as
granite. "Not if you want something between us." "It's because I do want something
between us." "Alexi." So many emotions,
she thought. Always before it had been easy to sort them out, to
drift with them. But this time… It had been a long, hard day,
she reminded herself. There would be time to think later. "If
what you want is someone you can tuck in a comfortable corner, it
isn't me. What you do is part of what you are." -When he turned,
she brushed her hands over his cheeks again, refusing to let him
retreat. "You want me to say I was appalled by what I saw in
that room? I was. I was appalled by the cruelty of it, sickened by
the terrible, terrible waste." That sliced at him, a long, thin blade
through the heart. "I shouldn't have let you go with me. That
part of my life isn't ever going to be part of yours." "Stop." The sorrow that had
paled her face hardened into determination. "Do you think that
because I write fantasy I don't know anything about the real world?
You're wrong. I know, it just doesn't overwhelm my life. And I know
that what you faced today you may face tomorrow. Or worse. I know
that every time you walk out the door you may not come back."
The quick lick of fear reminded her to slow down and speak carefully.
"What you are makes that a very real possibility. But I won't
let that overwhelm me, either. Because there's nothing about you I'd
change." For a moment, he simply stared at her,
a hundred different feelings fighting for control inside him. Then,
slowly, he lowered his brow to hers and shut her eyes. "I don't
know what to say to you." "You don't have to say anything.
We don't have to talk at all." He knew what she was offering, even
before she tilted her head and touched her lips to his. He wanted it,
and her. More than anything, he wanted to steep himself in her until
the rest of the world went away. He took his hands through her hair,
letting his fingers toy with those loose, vivid curls. "We
haven't come up with those rules." Her lips curved, slanted over his.
"We'll figure them out later." He murmured his agreement, drawing her
closer. "I want you. I need to be with you. I think I'd go crazy
if I couldn't be with you tonight." "I'm here. Right here." "Bess." His mouth moved from
hers to skim along those sharp cheekbones. "I'm in love with
you." She felt her heart stutter. That was
the only way she could describe this sensation she'd never
experienced before. "Alexi—" "Don't." He closed his mouth
over hers again. "Don't say it. It comes too easy to you. Just
come to bed." He buried his face against her neck. "For
God's sake, let me take you to bed."
Chapter 8
Contents - Prev/Next Hurt. Oh, she'd read the stories and
the poetry, watched the movies. She'd even written the scenes. But
she'd never believed that love and pain existed together, could twine
into one clenched fist to batter the soul. Yet his words had hurt
her—immeasurably—even as her heart opened to give and
accept. This time it was different. How could
she possibly explain that to him, when she was still groping for the
answers herself? And what good were words now, when there was so much
need? A touch would be enough, she promised
herself as they swayed toward the steps. Tonight would be enough, and
tomorrow all the aches would only be memories. His mouth came back to hers, restless,
insistent, as they began the climb. The first helpless sigh caught in
her throat as he pulled her close and aroused her unbearably with a
long, sumptuous meeting of lips. Her fingers trembled when she tugged at
his jacket. Had they ever trembled for a man before? she wondered.
No. And as the leather slid away, leaving
her free to grip those magnificent shoulders, she knew that none of
this had happened before. Not the trembling, not the raw scrape of
nerves, not the sting of bright tears, not the sweet, slow throb of
her blood. This was the first time for so many
things. He didn't know how much longer he could perform the simple
act of drawing breath in and out of his lungs. Not when her body was
shivering against his. Not when he could hear those small,
desperately needy sounds in her throat. The staircase seemed to
stretch interminably. With a muffled oath, he swept her up into his
arms. Her eyes met his, and though her heart
seemed ready to burst, she managed to smile. She knew he needed
smiles tonight. "And I said you weren't romantic." "I have my moments." Shaky, she nuzzled her face into the
curve of his neck. "I'm awfully glad I'm here for this one." "Keep it up," he said in a
strained voice as she ran nibbling kisses from throat to ear, "and
I'll do something really romantic, like falling on my face and
dropping you." "Oh, I trust you, Detective."
She caught the lobe of his ear in her teeth and felt the quick jerk
of reaction. "Completely." With his heart roaring in his head, he
reached the top. She was teasing his jawline now, making little
murmurs of approval as she sampled his flesh." He headed for the
first door. "This better be the bedroom." "Mmm-hmm…" While she
worked her way to his mouth, her fingers were busy unbuttoning his
shirt. He recognized her scent first. Even as
he passed through the doorway, it wrapped its alluring woman's
fingers around him. That cheerful, sexy fragrance hung in the air,
the result, no doubt, of spilled powder and an unstoppered bottle of
perfume. Her clothes were a colorful mess of silk blouses, bright
cotton pants, tangled hose. His quick scan passed over a life-size
stuffed ostrich, a pair of thriving ficus trees flanking the wide
window, and a collection of antique bottles, elegant in jewel colors,
before he focused on the bed. It was a long, wide ocean of cool blue
sheets, topped by a lush mountain of vivid-toned pillows. All satins
and silks. Because his mouth was beginning to
water, he took one long, slow breath. But the air, so fragrant,
burned his lungs. "That looks big enough for six close friends." "I like a lot of room." Even
as his stomach quivered at the images that evoked, she was
continuing. "I used to fall out of bed a lot when I was a kid." "Is that how you broke your nose?" "No. But I chipped a tooth once." He set her down beside the bed, pleased
that her arms stayed linked around his neck. "I think we can
probably keep from falling out of this one. If we work on it." She raised up on her toes, just a
little, just enough to bring them eye-to-eye. "I'm willing to
risk it." Determined to steady himself, he kissed
her brow, her cheeks. "Let me take my gun off." He stripped off the holster, set it on
the floor. With fingers that were suddenly numb and awkward, she
reached for the buttons of her blazer. "No." It was that one quick
flash of nerves in her eyes that had settled his own. He closed his
hands over hers. "Let me." He unfastened buttons, then took
his hands slowly up her sides, his thumbs just brushing her breasts.
"You're shaking." "I know." Watching her, he slid the jacket from
her shoulders. "Are you afraid of me?" "No." She couldn't swallow.
"Of this, a little. It's silly." He toyed with the first button of her
blouse, then the second. Her skin quivered as his knuckle skimmed
over it. "I like it." "That's good." She tried to
laugh, but only managed one trembling breath. "Because I can't
seem to stop." "There's plenty of time to relax."
The blouse slipped away, and desire curled its powerful fist in his
stomach. Midnight-blue silk shimmered in the dimming light, gleaming
against ivory skin. "There's no hurry." "I—" Her head fell back
as he traced a finger over the silk. Gently, so gently, over the
swell of her breasts, as though hers was the first body he'd touched.
The only one he wanted to touch. "God, Alexi…" "I've spent a lot of time
imagining this. Step out of your shoes," he suggested while he
unhooked her slacks. In a daze, she obeyed as the slacks slithered
down her legs. "I'm going to spend a lot more time enjoying it.
I want all of you." Lazily, testingly, he ran a finger under the
lace cut high on her thigh. Ah, the skin there was like rose petals
dewed with morning. Her eyes went wide and dark; her body quaked.
"All of you," he repeated. She couldn't move. Every muscle in her
body had turned to water. Hot, rushing water. She couldn't speak, not
when so many emotions clogged her throat. As she stood swaying,
helplessly seduced, he watched her. Touched her. Clever fingers
brushing, stroking, exploring. He trailed them up her arms, slid them
over her shoulders. Then back to silk, until her body burned like
fever. His eyes never left hers. Even when he
kissed her, lightly, tormenting her hungry lips with the barest of
tastes, his eyes stayed open and aware. "You're making me crazy." Her
voice hitched out through trembling lips. "I know. I want to." He caught her wrists when she reached
for him, then ran their tangled fingers over her, so that she felt
her own response to him, inside and out, as he touched his mouth to
hers again. Patiently, erotically, he deepened the kiss, until her
hands went limp and her pulse thundered. Then he brought her hands
up, spread them over his chest. Together they spread his open shirt
apart. With his mouth still clinging to hers, he tugged it off. His
heart gave a quick, hard lurch as her hands, hot and eager, raced
over him. Yanking her close, he took off his
shoes. His skin was already damp when he fumbled for the snap of his
jeans. "I want you under me." He
tore his mouth from hers to savor her throat. "I want to feel
you move under me." They lowered to the bed, rolled once,
then twice, over silk. He used every ounce of control, every degree
of will, to keep himself from plunging into her and taking the quick,
desperate release his body craved. His mind, his soul, wanted more
than that. She seemed smaller like this. Slighter.
It helped him remember that passion could outstrip tenderness. So,
while the blood pounded and burned in his veins, he loved her slowly. She discovered that a woman could drown
willingly in sweetness. She knew there was a gun on the floor beside
them and that he had used it at least once to kill. But the hands
that moved over her were those of a gentle man. One who cared. She
rested a palm on his cheek as she floated away on the kiss. One who
loved. Who loved her. Staggered by the knowledge, she poured
everything she had into the kiss, needing to show him that whatever
he felt was returned, equally. Then his mouth slid from hers to trail
down her throat, over her shoulder. All thought, all reason,
skittered away. In a warm, slippery pool of silk and
satin, he showed her what it was to ache for someone. To yearn for
the sharp, thin point of pain the poets call ecstasy. Her hips arched
under his, desperately offering. But he only continued that
tormenting journey over her with teasing lips and gentle hands. When his tongue flicked under the line
of lace that clung tenuously to her breasts, she moaned, pressing an
urgent hand to the back of his head. The taste there—honey,
dampened by her arousal—nearly unraveled the taut knot of his
control. So he pleased them both, closing a greedy mouth over that
firm, scented swell. Gasping out with pleasure, she bucked
under him, straining for more, her nails digging heedlessly into his
back as she whimpered and struggled for what was just out of reach.
Maddened by her response, he brought his mouth to hers again,
crushing her lips as he slithered a hand down to cup the heat between
her thighs. Prayers and pleas trembled on her tongue, but before she
could voice them, he slipped under the silk to stroke. The unbearable pleasure shattered.
Fractured lights, whirling colors, spun behind her eyes to blind her.
She heard herself cry out; his name was nearly a sob. Then there was
his groan, a sound of sweet satisfaction as her body went limp in
release. Never before. Her hands slid away from
him, boneless. Sweet Lord, never like this. She felt weak, wrecked,
weepy. As her breath sobbed out, as her eyes fluttered closed, they
both knew that her mind, her body, were totally his for the taking. He'd never felt stronger. Her wild
response, her absolute surrender, filled him with a kind of intense
power he'd never experienced before. Silk rustled against silk as he
drew the teddy down, tossed it aside. Her skin, slick with passion,
glowed in the shadows. He touched where he chose, watching,
fascinated, as his own hands molded her. Gold against ivory. He
tasted wherever he liked, feeling her muscles quiver involuntarily as
he traced openmouthed kisses over her rib cage, down to her stomach.
Heat to heat. Then, wanting that instant of sheer
pleasure again, he drove her up a second time, shuddering himself as
her body convulsed and flowed with the crest of the wave. At last,
unable to wait a moment longer, he slipped inside that hot, moist
sheath. Her groan of stunned delight echoed his own. Slowly, as in a dream, her arms lifted
to wrap around him. She rose to meet him, to take him deep. They
moved gently at first, treasuring the intimacy, willing to prolong
it. But need outpaced them, driving them faster, until, thrust for
thrust, they sprinted toward the final crest. His hand fisted in her hair as the last
link of control snapped clean. Her name exploded from his lips like
an oath as he emptied himself into her. She wondered how she could ever have
thought herself experienced. While it was true she hadn't been with
as many men as some thought, she hadn't come to Alexi an innocent. Yet things had happened tonight that
had never happened before. And, because she was a woman who
understood herself well, she knew that nothing she had experienced
here would happen again—unless it was with him. Relaxed now,
she rubbed her cheek over his chest, content to remain as she'd been
since he rolled over and dragged her across him. Tucked in the cocoon
of his arms, she felt as cozy as a cat, and she arched lazily as he
ran a hand down her spine. "Will you tell me again?" she
asked. "What?" She pressed her lips against him,
feeling his heart beating strong and fast beneath them. "What
every woman wants to hear." "I love you." When she lifted
her head, he laid a hand gently over her lips. He knew it would hurt
to hear her say it, when she didn't mean it as he did. Suddenly she was glad it was dark, and
he couldn't see the smile fade away from her face. "Even after
this," she said carefully, "you don't want me to love you
back." More than anything, he thought. More
than life. "Let's just leave things as they are." He traced
her face with a fingertip, enjoying those odd angles. "Tell me
how you broke your nose." She was silent a moment, gathering her
composure. She couldn't offer what he didn't want to take.
"Fistfight." He chuckled and drew her back to
cuddle, instinctively soothing the tension out of her. "I should
have figured." She made an effort to relax against
him. There was time to convince him. Hadn't he said they had plenty
of time? "At boarding school," she added. "I was
twelve and homely as a duck. Too skinny, funny hair, dumb face." "I like your face. And your hair."
His hand cupped her breast comfortably. "And your body." "You didn't know me when I was
twelve. When you're odd in any way, you're a target." "I know." Interested, she lifted her head again.
"Do you?" "I didn't learn English until I
was five. Before my father's business got off the ground, times were
rough." He turned his face into her hair to breathe in the
scent. "I was this little Ukrainian kid, wearing my brother's
hand-me-downs. And back then, Soviets weren't particularly popular
with Americans." "Well, you made such great
villains." She kissed his cheek, comforting the small boy he'd
been. "It must have been difficult for you." "I had the family. We had each
other. School was a little rugged at first. Name-calling, playground
scuffles. Even some of the parents weren't too keen on having their
kids play with the Russkie. No point in trying to explain we were
Ukrainian." He shifted, tangled his legs with hers. "So,
after a few black eyes and bloody noses, I earned a reputation for
being tough. After a while, we kind of got absorbed into the
neighborhood." "What neighborhood?" "Brooklyn. My parents still live
there. Same house." With a shake of his head, he drew back. He
could make her out now in the dark, could see the way her eyes were
smiling at him. "How come we're talking about me, when I asked
you about your nose?" "I like hearing it." "There was a fistfight," he
said, prompting her. Bess sighed. "One of those girl
cliques," she began. "You know the type. The cool kids, all
hair and teeth and attitude. I was the nerd they liked to pick on." "You were never a nerd." "I was a champion nerd. Gawky, top
of the class academically, socially inept." "You?" There was such pure disbelief in the
tone, she laughed. "Which of those descriptions don't you buy,
Alexi?" He considered a moment. "Any of
them." "I guess I'm two-thirds flattered
and one-third insulted. I was tall for my age and skinny. A very late
bloomer in the bosom and hips department." "You might have bloomed slow,"
he began, proving his point with a sweep of his hand, "but you
bloomed very well." "Thank you. My mind, however, had
developed quite nicely. Straight A's." "No kidding?" He grinned in
the dark. "And you were the kid who always trashed the grading
curve for the rest of us." "That's the idea. Added to that, I
was more comfortable with a book, or thinking, than I was tittering.
Young girls do a lot of tittering. Because I was hardheaded, I
automatically took a dislike to anything that was popular or
fashionablc at the time. As a result, I took a lot of flak. Bess the
Mess, that sort of thing." She paused long enough to shift some
pillows. "Anyway, we had this history exam coming up. One of the
cool kids—her name was Dawn Gallagher… Heart-shaped
face, perfect features, long, flowing blond hair. You get the
picture." "Prom-queen type." "Exactly. She was flunking
big-time and wanted me to let her copy from my paper. She'd made my
life adolescent hell, and she figured if she was nice to me for a
couple of days, let me stand within five feet of her, maybe sit at
the. same lunch table, I'd be so grateful, I'd let her." "But you hung tough." "I don't cheat for anybody. The
upshot was, she flunked the exam, and her parents were called to the
school for a conference. Dawn retaliated by pinching me whenever I
got too close, getting into my room and breaking my things, stealing
my books. Small-time terrorism. One day on the basketball court—" "You shot hoop?" "Team captain. I was an athletic
nerd," she explained. "Anyway, she tripped me. If that
wasn't bad enough, she had a few friends on the other team. They
elbowed the hell out of me during the game. I had bruises
everywhere." An immediate flood of resentment had
him tightening his hold. "Little bitches." Pleased with the support, she cuddled
closer. "It was an epiphany for me. Suddenly I saw that
pacifism, while morally sound, could get you trampled into dust. I
waited for Dawn outside the science lab one day. We started out with
words—I've always been good at them. We progressed to pushing
and shoving and drew quite a crowd. She swung first. I didn't expect
it, and she bopped me right on the nose. Let me tell you, Detective,
pain can be a great motivator." "Separates the nerds from the
toughs." "You got it. It took three of them
to pull me off her, but before they did, I'd blackened her
baby-blues, split her Cupid's-bow mouth and loosened several of her
pearly-whites." "Good for you, McNee." "It was good," she said with
a sigh. "In fact, it felt so good, I've had to be careful with
my temper ever since. I didn't just want to hurt her, you see. I
wanted to mangle her." He took her hand, curled it into a fist
and raised it to his lips. "I'll have to watch my step. Did you
take much heat?" "We both got suspended. My parents
were appalled and embarrassed enough by my behavior to cancel my
summer plans and switch me to another school." "But—" He cut himself
off. Not every family was as supportive as his. "It was the best thing that could
have happened to me," she told him. "I started off with a
clean slate. I was still ugly, but I knew how to handle myself." Even if she didn't realize she was
carrying around some emotional scars, he did. He rolled over her,
cupping her face in his hands. "Listen, McNee, you're
beautiful." Amused, she grinned. "Sure I am." He didn't smile. In the dim light, his
eyes were very intense. "I said, you're beautiful. Why else
haven't I been able to get you out of my mind since the first time I
saw you?" "Intriguing," she corrected.
"Unusual." "Gorgeous," he murmured, and
watched her blink in surprise. "Ivory for skin, fire for hair,
jade for eyes. And these." He traced a fingertip over a
sprinkling of freckles. "Gold dust." "You've already gotten me into
bed, Alexi," she said lightly. She had to speak lightly, or
she'd humiliate herself with tears. "But the flattery is
appreciated." With a grin, she linked her arms around his neck.
"But haven't you heard the one about actions speaking louder
than words?" He arched a brow. "If you insist." "Oh, I do," she murmured, as
his mouth came down to hers. "I absolutely do." With her bag slapping hard against her
hip, Bess raced into the office, ten minutes late. "I have a
good excuse," she called to Lori. Her perpetually prompt partner was
standing by the coffeepot, her back to the door. "It's all
right. I'm running behind myself." "You?" Bess dropped her bag,
stretched her shoulders. She might have skipped her workout that
morning, but she was feeling as limber as a snake. "What is it,
a national holiday?" She crossed to the pot herself, chattering
as she poured a cup. "Well, I'd save my excuse for another time,
but I can hardly stand not to tell you." She lifted shining
eyes, then stopped after one look at Lori's face. "What is it,
honey?" "It's nothing." After giving
herself a shake, Lori sipped her coffee. "It's just that Steven
caught me on my way in." "Did he say something to upset
you?" "He said he loved me." She
pressed her lips together. She'd be damned if she'd cry over him
again. "The sonofabitch." "Let's sit down." Bess curled
a comforting arm around Lori's shoulder. "You might not want to
hear this, but I think he means it." "He doesn't even know what it
means." Furious, Lori dashed one rogue tear away. "I'm not
going to let him do this to me again. Get me believing, get me all
churned up, just so he can back off when things get serious. Let him
have the fantasy life. I've got reality." Because she'd been waiting for an
opening just like this, Bess crouched down in front of her. "Which
is?" "A job, paying your bills—" "Boring," Bess finished, and
Lori's brimming eyes flashed. "Then I'm boring." "No, you're not." Sighing,
Bess set her coffee aside and took one of Lori's hands. "Maybe
you're afraid to take risks, but that doesn't make you boring. And I
know you want more out of life than a job and a good credit rating." "What's wrong with those things?" "Nothing, as long as that's not
all you have. Lori, I know you're still in love with him." "That's my problem."' "His, too. He's miserable without
you." Suddenly weary, Lori rubbed her fingers
between her brows. "He's the one who broke things off. He said
he didn't want complications, a long-term commitment." "He was wrong. I'd bet the bank
that he knows he's wrong. Why don't you just talk to him?" "I don't know if I can." She
squeezed her eyes tight. "It hurts." An odd light flickered in Bess's eyes.
"Is that how you know it's real? When it hurts?" "It's one of the top symptoms."
She opened her eyes again. This time, there was a trace of hope mixed
with the tears. "Do you really think he's unhappy?" "I know he is. Just talk, Lori.
Hear each other out." "Maybe." She gave Bess's hand
a quick squeeze, then reached for her coffee again. "I wasn't
going to dump this on you first thing." "What are pals for?" "Well, pal, we'd better get to
work, or a lot of people will be out of a job." "Great. I've been playing with the
dialogue in that scene between Storm and Jade. We want to bump up the
sexual tension." Lori was already nodding and booting up
the computer. "You're the dialogue champ," she began, then
glanced up. "So why were you late?" "It's not important. We've got
them running into each other at the station house. The long look
first, then—" "Bess, you're only making me more
curious. Get it out of the way, or I won't be able to work." "Okay." She was all but
bursting to tell, in any case. "I was with Alexi." "I thought that was yesterday." "It was." Bess's smile
spread. "And last night. And this morning. Oh, Lori, it's
incredible. I've never felt this way about anyone." "Right." She started to pick
up her reading glasses, then looked up again. For a moment, she did
nothing but study Bess's face. "Say that again." "I've never felt this way about
anyone." "Good grief." On a quick huff
of breath, Lori sat back. "I think you mean it." "It's different." With a half
laugh, Bess pressed a hand to her cheek. "It's scary, and it
hurts, and sometimes I look at him and I can't even breathe. I'm so
afraid he might take a good look at me and realize his mistake."
She let her hand drop away. "It's supposed to be easy." "No." Slowly Lori shook her
head. "That was always your mistake. It's supposed to be hard,
and scary and real." "There's this clutching around my
heart." "Yeah." "And… and…"
Frustrated, Bess turned, scooting around a chair so that she could
pace the length of the table. "And my stomach's all tied up in
knots one minute. The next I feel so happy I can hardly bear it. When
we were together last night…" No way to describe it, she
thought. No possible way. "Lori, I swear, no one's ever made me
feel like that. And this morning, when I woke up beside him, I didn't
know whether to laugh or cry." Lori rose, held out a hand.
"Congratulations, McNee. You've finally made it." "Looks that way." With a
laugh, she threw her arms around Lori and squeezed. "Why didn't
you ever tell me how it feels?" "It's something you have to
experience firsthand. How about him?" "He loves me." She felt
foolish and weepy. Digging through her bag she found a tattered
tissue. "He told me. He looked at me, and he told me. But—" "Oh-oh." "He doesn't want me to tell him
how I feel." Hissing a breath through her teeth, she pressed a
hand to her stomach. "Oh, God, it hurts. It hurts everywhere
when I realize he doesn't trust me enough. He thinks it's like all
the other times. Why shouldn't he? But I want him to know it's
not—and I don't know how.'' "He only has to look at you." "It's not enough." Calmer
now, Bess blew her nose. "Everything's different this time. I
guess I have to prove myself. I do love him, Lori." "I can see that. I wasn't sure I
ever would." Touched, she lifted a hand to Bess's hair. "You
could take your own advice, and talk to him.'' "We have talked. But he doesn't
want to hear this, at least not yet. He wants things to stay as they
are." Lori lifted her brows. "What do
you want?" "For him to be happy." She
chuckled and stuffed the mangled tissue back in her purse. "That
makes me sound like a wimp. You know I'm not." "Who knows you better? It only
makes you sound like a woman in the first dizzy stages of love." Bess gave her a watery smile. "Does
it get worse or better?" "Both." "That's good news. Well, while
it's getting worse and better, I'll have time to show him how I
feel." She picked up her coffee, then set it aside again. "Lori,
there's one more thing." "What could be bigger?" Lori
demanded. "Alexi wants me to have dinner
with his family on Sunday." After a quick gurgle of laughter,
Lori's eyes widened. "He's taking you home to Mother?" "And Father," Bess put in.
"And brothers and sisters and nieces and nephews. A couple times
a month they have a big family dinner on Sunday." "Obviously the man is crazy about
you." "He is. I know he is." Then
she shut her eyes and dropped into a chair. "His family is
enormously important to him. You can hear it every time he mentions
one of them." She grabbed another tissue and began to tear it to
shreds. "I want to meet them. Really. But what if they don't
like me?" "You have got it bad. Take it from
me, you just be the Bess McNee we all know and love, and they'll be
crazy about you, too." "But what if—" "What if you pull yourself
together?" This time Lori picked up her glasses, perched them on
her nose. "Put some of this angst into Storm and Jade's
heartbreak. Millions of viewers will thank you." After a deep breath, Bess nodded.
"Okay, okay. That might work. And if we don't get the morning
session out of the way, we won't be ready when Rosalie comes in at
noon for a consulting session." "Your deal, sister."
Frowning, Lori gestured with a pencil. "That particular lady
makes me nervous." "Don't worry about Rosalie. I know
what I'm doing." "How many times have I heard
that?" But Bess only smiled and let her mind
drift. "Okay. Storm and Jade." She closed her eyes,
envisioned the scene. "So, they run into each other at the
station…"
Chapter 9
Contents - Prev/Next And then," Bess continued as she
zipped through traffic, "Jade turns back, devastated, and says,
'But what you want isn't always what you need.' Music swells, fade
out." "It's not that I'm not fascinated
by the twists and turns of those people in Holbrook…" "Millbrook." "Right." Alex winced as she
cut off a sedan. "I just wish you'd watch the road. It would be
really embarrassing if you got a ticket while I was in the car with
you." "I'm not speeding." Frowning,
she glanced down at her speedometer. "Hardly." She handled the five speed like a
seasoned veteran of the Indianapolis 500, Alex thought. And at the
moment she was treating the other, innocent drivers on the road like
competitors. "Maybe you could find a home in one lane and stay
there." "Killjoy." But she did as he
asked. "I hardly ever get to drive. I love it." He had to smile. The wind whipping in
through the open sunroof was blowing her hair everywhere. "I'd
never have guessed." "The last time I had a chance was
when L.D. and I went to some fancy do on Long Island." She
checked her mirror and, unable to resist, shot into the next lane.
"One trip with me and he insisted on taking his car and driver
every damn place." She sent Alex a smile, then sobered instantly
when she saw his expression. "I'm sorry." "For what?" "For bringing him up." "I didn't say anything." No, he hadn't said anything, she
admitted. A man didn't have to say a word when his eyes could go that
cold. Her hands tightened on the wheel. Now she stared straight
ahead. "He was a friend, Alexi. That's
all he ever was. I didn't…" She took a long, careful
breath. "I never slept with him." "I didn't ask one way or the
other," he said coolly. "Maybe you should. One minute you
want to know all there is about me, and the next you don't. I think—" "I think you're driving too fast
again." He reached over and brushed his knuckles down her cheek.
"And you should relax. Okay?" "Okay." But her fingers
remained tight on the wheel. "I'd like—sometime—for
us to talk about it." "Sometime." Damn it, didn't
she realize he didn't want to talk about the other men who'd been
part of her life? He didn't want to think about them. Especially now,
now that he was in love, and he knew what it was like to be with her. He knew the sound of that little sigh
she made when she turned toward him in the night. The way her eyes
stayed unfocused and heavy, long after she awakened in the morning.
He knew she liked her showers too hot and too long. And that she smelled so good because
she rubbed some fragrant cream all over before she'd even dried off. She was always losing things. An
earring, a scribbled note, money. She never counted her change, and
she always overtipped. He knew those things, was coming to
treasure them. Why should he talk about other men who had come to
know them? "Turn here." "Hmm?" "I said turn…" He
trailed off with a huff of breath as she breezed by the exit. "Okay,
take the next one, and we'll double back." "The next what?" "Turn, McNee." He reached
over and gave her hair a quick tug. "Take the next turn, which
means you have to get over in the right lane." "Oh." She did, punching the
gas and handily cutting off another car. At the rude blast of its
horn, she only lifted a hand and waved. "He wasn't being friendly,"
Alex pointed out—after he took his hands from in front of his
eyes. "I know. But that's no reason for
me to be rude, too." "Some people consider cutting off
another driver rude." "No. That's an adventure." Somehow they made it without mishap.
But the moment she'd squeezed into a parking place two doors down
from his parents' row house, he held out his hand. "Keys." Sulking, she jingled them in her hand.
"I didn't get a ticket." "Probably because there wasn't a
traffic cop brave enough to pull you over. Let's have them, McNee.
I've had enough adventure for one day." "You just want to drive." Her
eyes narrowed suspiciously. "It's a man thing." "It's a survival thing." He
plucked them from her hand. "I just want to live." Not
that he was going to object to handling the natty little Mercedes.
But he decided against bringing that up as they climbed out of
opposite doors. "Pretty neighborhood," she
commented, taking in the trees and freshly painted house trim and
flowering plants, the scatter of kids riding over the uneven sidewalk
on bikes and skateboards. A few of them called out to Alex. Bess
found herself being given the once-over by a group of teenage boys
before they sent hoots and whistles and thumbs-up signs in Alex's
direction. "Ah, the first stamp of approval."
But she rubbed her damp palm surreptitiously against her skirt before
taking his hand. "Did you used to ride bikes along the
sidewalk?" "Sure." Battling nerves, she strolled with him
toward the house. "And sit on the curb in the summer and lie
about girls?" "I didn't have to lie," he
told her with a wicked grin. He glanced up the steps as the door
opened and Mikhail came out, Griff on his hip. "You're late again." He
started down, jiggling Griff. "She missed the turn." "He's always late." Mikhail
smiled. "You're Bess." "Yes. Hello." She held out a
hand and found that his was hard as rock. Griff had already leaned
over to give Alex a kiss, and now, still puckered, he leaned toward
Bess. Laughing, she pressed her mouth to his. "And hello to you,
too, handsome." "Griff likes the ladies,"
Mikhail told her. "Takes after his uncle." "Don't start," Alex muttered… Mikhail ignored him and continued to
study Bess until she was fighting the need to squirm. "Do I have
dirt on my face, or what?" "No, sorry." He shifted his
gaze to his brother. "You're improving, Alexi," he said in
Ukrainian. "This one is well worth a few sweaty mornings in the
gym." "Tak." He skimmed a hand down
to the nape of Bess's neck. "If you tell her about that, I'll
strangle you in your sleep." Mikhail's grin flashed. The resemblance
was startling, Bess thought. Those wild, dark looks, that simmering
sexuality. And the child had the looks, as well, she realized. Lord
help the women of the twenty-first century. "Guy talk?" she asked. "Bad manners," Mikhail said
apologetically, deciding he liked not only her unusual looks, but the
intelligence in her eyes, as well. Yes, indeed, he thought, Alex was
definitely improving. "I was complimenting my brother on his
taste. Take her in, Alex. Griff wants to watch the kids ride awhile." "Sydney?" he asked as he
mounted the steps. "She's here, but she's tired." "She works too hard." "There is that." The grin
spread again. "And she's pregnant." Alex stopped, turned. "Yeah?"
He went down the steps again to catch Mikhail and Griff in a bear
hug. "It's good?" . "It's great. We want our children
close, our family big." "You're off to the right start."
He grabbed Bess's hand as Mikhail lifted Griff onto his shoulders and
crossed the street. Griff was clapping his hands and shouting toddler
gibberish to the other kids. "I'm still trying to get used to
him being a papa, and now he's going to have another." She'd forgotten her nerves. Perhaps the
child's sweet, unaffected kiss had done it. She slipped an arm around
Alex's waist. "Come on, Uncle Alex. I want to meet the rest of
them." "They're loud," he warned as
they started back up the door. "I like loud." . "They can be nosy." "So can I." At the door, he took both of her hands.
He'd brought women into his home before, but it had never been
important. This was vital. "I love you, Bess." Before she
could speak, he kissed her, then pushed open the door. They certainly were loud, Bess
discovered. No one seemed to mind if everyone talked at once, or if
the big, droopy-eared dog barked and raced around the living room to
hide behind chairs. And they were nosy, though they were charming
with it. She'd hardly had a chance to get her bearings before she was
sitting next to Alex's father, Yuri, and being cagily interrogated. "So you write stories for TV."
He nodded his big, shaggy head approvingly. "You have brains." "A few." She smiled up at
Zack when he offered her a glass of wine. "Rachel says more than a few."
He sent his wife a wink as she sat with her hands folded over her
enormous belly. "She's been watching your show." "Oh, yeah?" "I admit I was curious."
Rachel wanted to shift to get comfortable, but she knew.it was
useless. "After we met, I taped it a couple of times. Then, when
I gave in to Zack's hounding me about taking maternity leave, I
realized how easy it is to get hooked. I'm not sure I've got all the
characters straight yet, but it's amazingly entertaining. Nick's
caught it with me." She glanced at her brother-in-law. To his credit, Nick didn't blush, but
he did squirm. "I was just keeping you company." He might
have come a long way from trying to prove his manhood with gangs like
the Cobras, but even at nearly twenty-one, he wasn't quite secure
enough to admit he'd gotten caught up in the "Secret Sins"
of Millbrook. He shrugged, shook back his shaggy blond hair, then
caught the quick grins of his family. "It wasn't like I was
really watching." His green eyes glinted with humor. "Except
for the babes." . "That's what they all say." Bess
smiled back, enjoying him. Too bad he wasn't an actor, she thought.
Those brooding good looks—tough, with just a hint of
vulnerability beneath—would shine on-screen. "So, who's
your type, Nick? LuAnne, our sensitive ingenue with the big, weepy
eyes, who suffers in silence, or the scheming Brooke, who uses her
sexuality to destroy any man who crosses her?" Considering, he ran his tongue around
his teeth. "Actually, I go for Jade. I've got this thing for
older women." Zack caught him in a headlock. "Hey." Nick laughed, not
bothering to try to free himself. "We're having a conversation
here. I'm trying to make tune with Alex's lady." "Kill him in the other room, will
you?" Alex said easily. "We have to eat in here." "I watch your show many times,"
Nadia said as she popped in from the kitchen. Alex's mother's
handsome face was flushed pink from oven heat. "I like it." "Well, that Yield's not hard to
watch." Zack stood behind his wife now, rubbing her shoulders. "Men always go for the cheap
floozies," Rachel put in. "How about you, Alex? Caught any
'Secret Sins'?" "No." Not that he'd admit.
"McNee keeps me up on what's happening in Millbrook." "It must be hard." Sydney,
looking pale but blissfully relaxed in her corner of the couch,
sipped her ginger ale. "The pace." "It's murder." Bess grinned.
"I love it." "So, how is it you meet Alexi?"
Yuri asked. "He arrested me." There was a moment of silence, while
Alex aimed a killing look at Bess. Then a burst of laughter that sent
the dog careening around the room again. "Did I miss a joke?" Mikhail
demanded as he swung through the door with Griff. "No." Rachel chuckled again
while her brother sat on the arm of the couch, beside his wife. "But
I have a feeling it's going to be a good one. Come on, Bess, this I
have to hear." She told them, while Alex interrupted a
half-dozen times to disagree or correct or put in his own
perspective. Even as they sat at the b'ig old table to enjoy Nadia's
pot roast, they were shouting with laughter or calling out questions. "He put you in a cell, but you
still go out with him." This from Mikhail. "Well." Bess ran her tongue
over her teeth. "He is kind of cute." With a hearty laugh, Yuri slapped his
son on the back. "The ladies, they always say so." Alex scooped up potatoes. "Thanks,
Papa." "Is good to be attractive to
women." He wiggled his brows at his wife. "Then, when you
pick one, she is helpless to resist." "I picked you," Nadia told
him, passing biscuits to Nick. "You were very slow. Like a bear
with, ah…" She struggled for the right word. "Soft
brains." She ignored Yuri's snort of objection. "He did not
come to court me. So I courted him." "Every time I turn, there she is.
In my way." When he looked at his wife, Bess saw memories and
more in his eyes. "There was no prettier girl in the village
than Nadia. Then she was mine." "I liked your big hands and shy
eyes," she told him. Her smile was quick and lovely. "Soon
you were not so shy. But my boys," she added, turning the smile
on Bess, "they were never shy with the girls." "Why waste time?" On impulse,
Alex put a hand on Bess's cheek and turned her face to his. Her smile
was puzzled. Then surprise shot into her eyes as he covered her mouth
with his. Not a quick, friendly kiss, this, but a scaring one that
made her head buzz. She had no way of knowing that he'd
never kissed a woman not of his family at his mother's table. Nor
that by doing so, he was telling those he loved that this was the
woman. As the table erupted with applause,
Bess cleared her throat. "No," she managed. "Not a bit
shy." Nadia blinked back tears and raised her
glass. She understood what her son had told her and felt the
bittersweet pleasure that came from knowing the last of her children
had given his heart. "Welcome," she said to Bess. A little confused, Bess reached for her
glass as all the others were lifted. "Thank you." She
sipped, relieved when the chattering started again. How easy to fall in love with them, she
realized. All of them were so warm, so open, so comfortable with each
other. Her parents would never have had such a sweetly intimate
conversation at the table. Nor had they ever embraced her with the
verve and passion both Yuri and Nadia showed their children. Was this what she'd been missing all of
those years? Bess wondered. Had lacking something like this caused
her to be so socially clumsy as a child, and, making up for it, so
socially active as an adult? Still, what she had had, and what she
hadn't, had forged her into what she was, so she couldn't regret it.
Well, perhaps a little, she mused, falling unknowingly into the
family tradition by sneaking the dog bits of food under the table. It
was hard not to regret it a little when you saw how lovely it could
be to be part of such a solid whole. Absorbing everything, she glanced
around the table. And found Mikhail's eyes on her. This time she
smiled. "You're doing it again," she told him. "Yes. I want to carve you." "I beg your pardon?" "Your face." He reached out
to take it in his hand. The conversation continued around them, as if
he handled women at the dinner table regularly. "Very
fascinating. Mahogany would be best." Amused, she sat patiently while he
turned her face this way and that. "Is this a joke?" "Mikhail never jokes about his
work," Sydney commented, coaxing one more green bean into her
son. "I'm just surprised it's taken him so long to demand you
sit for him." "Sit?" She shook her head,
and then her eyes widened as it all came together. "Oh, of
course. Stanislaski. The artist. I've seen your work. Lusted after
it, actually." "You will sit for me, and I'll
give you a piece. You'll choose it." "I could hardly turn down an offer
like that." "Good." Satisfied, he went
back to his meal. "She's very beautiful," he said to Alex,
in such an offhand way that Bess laughed. "I'd say that Stanislaski taste
runs to the odd, but your wife proves me wrong." Mikhail brushed a hand over Sydney's
halo of auburn hair, stroked a finger down her classically lovely
face. "There are different kinds of beauty. You'll come to the
studio next week." "Don't bother to argue."
Sydney caught Mikhail's hand, squeezed it. "It won't do you a
bit of good." At the other end of the table, Rachel
winced. Nadia leaned closer, spoke gently. "How far apart?" Rachel gave a little sigh. "Eight,
ten minutes. They're very mild yet." "What's mild?" Zack glanced
at her, and then his mouth all but dropped to his knees. "Oh,
God, now? Now?" "Not this very minute." She
would be calm, Rachel told herself and took a deep, cleansing breath
to prove it. "I think you have time for some of Mama's cream
cake." "She's in labor." He gaped
across the table at his equally panicked brother. "We're not ready here." Nick
stumbled to his feet. "We're ready back at home. I'm supposed to
call the doctor, but I don't have the number." "Mama does," Rachel assured
her husband's younger brother. Then she lifted a hand to her
husband's. "Take it easy, Muldoon. There's plenty of time." "Time, hell. We're going now.
Shouldn't we go now?" Zack demanded of Nadia. She smiled and nodded. "It would
be best for you, Zack." "But, Mama—" Rachel's protest was cut off by Nadia's
gentle flow of Ukrainian, the gist of which had a great deal to do
with placating frightened husbands. "She should put her feet up,"
Mikhail announced. "This helped you, yes?" "Yes," Sydney agreed. "But
I think we should wait until she gets to the hospital." "Nine-one-one." Alex shoved
away from the table and sprang to his feet. "I'll call." "Oh, sit down." Rachel waved
an annoyed hand at him. "I don't need a cop." "An ambulance," he insisted. "I'm not sick, I'm in labor." "I take her in the truck."
Yuri was already up, prepared to lift his baby girl into his big
arms. "We get there very fast." While the men began to argue in a
mixture of languages, Nadia rose quietly and went into the kitchen to
call Rachel's obstetrician. "I've already been through this,"
Mikhail was saying to Alex. "I know how to handle it." "Ha." Their father pushed
them both aside and pounded a fist on his broad chest. "Me, four
times. You know nothing." "We don't have the tape recorder
or the music." Nick ran a hand through his flow of sandy hair.
He was desperately afraid he'd be sick. Though no one was listening
to him, he continued to babble. "The video camera. We've got to
get the video camera." "Honey, you want some water? You
want some juice?" When she yelped, he turned dead white.
"Another one? It hasn't been ten minutes, has it?" "You're breaking my hand."
Rachel shook it free and sent a pleading look to Sydney. "Okay, guys, back off." The
steel under velvet that made Sydney a successful businesswoman
snapped into her voice. "Alex, go upstairs and get your sister a
pillow for the ride. Yuri, go start the truck. That's a very good
idea. Nick, you, Mikhail and Griff go back to your apartment and get
what Rachel needs. We'll meet you at the hospital." "How do you get there?"
Mikhail demanded. "I have a car." Bess was
watching the family drama with fascinated eyes. "We can fit
three in a pinch." "Wonderful." Dispersing the
troops with all the flair of a general, Sydney gave her husband a
kiss and a shove. "Get going. Zack and Nadia will ride with Yuri
and Rachel. I'll go with Alex and Bess." As the next contraction hit, Rachel
began to breathe slowly, steadily. "Sorry," she said to
Bess in between breaths, "to put you out." "No problem." She had to bite
her tongue to prevent herself asking what it felt like to go into
labor at a family dinner. There'd be time for that later. "I called the doctor, and
Natasha." Nadia came back into the room, pleased that Sydney had
organized the troops. "Natasha and her family are coming." "We should go." Zack helped
Rachel to her feet and swallowed hard. "Shouldn't we go?" By the time they arrived at the
hospital, Sydney and Bess were the best of friends. It was difficult
to be otherwise, when they'd been crammed together in one seat while
Alex drove like a madman back to Manhattan. They talked about clothes, a few mutual
friends they'd discovered, and the Stanislaski men. Sydney agreed
that it was very forbearing of Bess not to mention the quality of
Alex's driving, after he'd been so critical of hers. By the time they found their way to the
maternity level, Rachel was already settled in a birthing room, Zack
had gotten over the first stages of panic, and Yuri was patting a
pocket full of cigars. "She's in the early stages,"
Nadia explained to them in the corridor, "Company is good for
her." Alex strode straight through the door,
but Bess hung back. "I-don't want to intrude," she said to
Nadia. "This is not intrusion. This is
family." Nadia cocked her head. "Are you uneasy with
childbirth?" "Oh, no. I couldn't be, after I've
written so many." Alex poked his head back out. "How'd
you research that, McNee?" "I did rounds with an
obstetrician." Her dimple winked out. "And found a few
mothers-to-be who didn't object to having me hang around during labor
and delivery. Have you ever seen one?" "No." His eyes changed. Just
like a man. "They, ah, show us films, just in case, but I've
never been at ground zero." "It's pretty great." She
laughed, perfectly able to read his thoughts. "Don't worry. I'll
hold your hand." They passed the time in the big, airy
birthing room telling stories, giving advice, joking with Zack once
Mikhail and Nick arrived with Rachel's things. Griff was happily
settled in with Zack's cook, Rio, so there was little to do but wait. When Rachel felt like walking, they
took turns leading her around the corridors, rubbing her back, making
small talk to take her mind off the discomfort between contractions. "I can see your mind working,"
Alex murmured to Bess. "'How can I use this?'" "It's ingrained." She
murmured her thanks when he passed her his cold drink. "Your
family," she said, glancing around the room. "I've never
known anyone like them. My parents—they'd be appalled to be
expected to take part in something like this." "It's our baby, too." She smiled and lifted a hand to his
cheek. "That's what I mean. You're all very special." "I'm glad you're here." As he
leaned over to kiss her, Yuri slapped him on the back. "Now all my children make babies
but you." He wiggled his brows at Bess. "You start soon,
yes?" "Papa…" Not sure how
to take Bess's chuckle, Alex rose and spoke, firmly and quietly, in
his mother tongue. "When I decide to make babies, I'll let you
know." "What decide?" Yuri gestured
toward Bess. "She's the one you want, isn't she?" "Yes." Now Yuri gestured expansively with both
hands. "Then?" "I have my reasons for waiting.
They're my reasons." Though the shake of Yuri's head was a
gesture of sadness, there was a twinkle in his eye. "How is it
all my children are so stubborn?" "How is it my papa is so nosy?" With a laugh, Yuri embraced Alex and
kissed both his cheeks. "Go take this pretty girl for a walk,
steal some kisses. Your sister will be some time yet." "That's advice I'll take." He
reached for Bess's hand and pulled her to her feet. "Come on,
let's get some air." "Alexi." Bess had to quicken
her pace to keep up with him. "Don't be angry with him. He
didn't mean to embarrass you." "Yes, he did, but I'm not angry
with him." "What were you two rattling on
about?" He punched the button for the elevator.
"You know, I don't think I'll teach you any Ukrainian. It comes
in too handy." "But it's—" "Rude," he finished for her,
grinning. "I know." By the time they came back again, Alex
had taken his father's advice to heart. Bess's head was still
spinning when they walked past the waiting room. It was Alex who
spotted Nick, pacing and smoking in the smoking lounge like the
cliche" expectant daddy. "How's it going, kid?" "It's been an awfully long time."
Nick's hand shook a bit as he lifted the cigarette to his lips. "I
mean, Sydney was only in a couple of hours for Griff. It's getting
really intense, and Rachel kicked me and the camera out. How come
they don't do something?" "I don't know a lot about it,"
Alex mused. "But I think babies come when they're ready." "It's only been a little more than
six hours." Bess moved in to soothe, touched that Nick should
have such deep concern for his sister-in-law. "Feels like six days," Zack
commented as he staggered in. He plucked the cigarette from Nick's
hand and took a deep drag. "She's swearing at me. I know what
some of those names are now, even if they aren't in English." "That's a good sign," Bess
assured him. "It means things are moving along." "She swore at the doctor, too."
With a sigh, he passed the cigarette back to Nick. "But she
didn't take a swing at him." "If she missed," Alex
commented, ''she must be in really bad shape." Wincing, Zack rubbed his shoulder. "She
didn't. I'd better get back." "Let's go give him some support,"
Alex began, but then he spotted a woman rushing off the elevator.
"Tash!" "Oh, Alex!" Bess watched the woman fly into the
waiting room, Gypsy hair flowing. There was concern in her eyes and
laughter on her lips as she swung into Alex's arms. "Alexi, how is Rachel?" "Swearing at her doctor and
punching Zack." "Ah." She relaxed instantly.
"That's good. Nick." She held out a hand for his. "Don't
look so worried. Your niece or nephew will be along soon. Spence is
parking the car. We were going to leave the children, but they were
so disappointed, we brought them. Freddie's looking forward to seeing
you." Nick brightened a bit. "How's she
doing?" "She's taller than me now, and so
pretty. Alex, where's Rachel?" "I'll take you. Oh, this is Bess." "Bess?" Natasha turned, one
hand still on her brother's arm. Of course, she'd heard about Bess.
West Virginia might be a fair distance from New York, but family
business traveled fast on phone wires. "I'm sorry. I didn't
realize." "That's all right. You've got a
lot on your mind." And then Bess said the first thing that came
to hers. "What fabulous genes you all have." Natasha's brows lifted. Then, below
them, her eyes lit with laughter. "Rachel said I would like you.
I hope we have time to talk before we leave town. I'm sorry to rush
off." "Don't worry about it. I think
Nick and I'll go to the cafeteria, rustle up some food for this
group." Three hours later, Bess had delivered
sandwiches and coffee, bounced Natasha's youngest daughter, Katie, on
her knee and introduced herself to Spence Kimball and helped him
entertain his very cranky son. She'd met Freddie and noted that the
pretty, pixielike teenager was deep in puppy love with Nick. As time dragged on, she added her
support when Mikhail pressured his very tired wife to rest in the
waiting room, took a few-minutes to interrogate some nurses to help
her beef up some hospital scenes and soothed Alex's nerves as his
sister's labor reached the final stages. "It won't be much longer." "That's what they said an hour
ago." They were standing in the waiting room.
Alex refused to sit. After a yawn and a good stretch, Bess wrapped
her arms around him. "She's fully dilated, and the baby
was crowning. The last glance I had of the fetal monitor showed a
really strong heartbeat. A fast one. I think it's a girl." "How do you know so much?" "Research." She settled her
head on his shoulder. "I was figuring earlier that I've
delivered twelve babies, including one set of twins. In a matter of
speaking." When her voice slurred, he tipped up
her chin. "You're asleep on your feet, McNee. I should have sent
you home." "You couldn't have pried me away." No, that was true, he realized. It was
just one more aspect to her beauty. "I owe you." "Then pay up." She lifted her
mouth, sighing into the kiss. "Mama." Though he'd enjoyed
watching his brother, Mikhail shot to his feet when he spotted his
parents in the doorway. "We have a new member of the
family." There were tears in Nadia's eyes and in Yuri's as he
stood with his arm tight around his wife. "What is it?" Nick and Alex
demanded together. "You will come see. They bring the
baby to the glass in a moment." "Rachel is resting." Yuri
dashed away a tear. "You will kiss her good night soon." They trooped out together, to wait by
the nursery window for the first glimpse. "I'm an uncle," Nick said to
Freddie. The girl's cheeks turned pink as he gave her a hard hug.
"Hey, there's Zack." He kept his arm around her as his
brother walked forward, holding a tiny bundle. The bundle was
squalling, and Zack was grinning from ear to ear. He held the baby up. Atop the curling
black hair was a bright pink bow. "It's a girl," Alex murmured,
and held Bess hard against him. "She's beautiful." "Man" was the best Nick could
do. "Oh, man." Overcome for a moment, he glanced down and
found himself looking at Freddie, who was still tucked under his arm.
He drew back, brushed a fingertip along her cheek and caught a tear
on the tip. "What's this?" "It's just so sweet."
Freddie's eyelashes were spiky and her eyes swam as she looked up at
him. He thought for a moment—an uncomfortable moment—that
it would be easy to drown in those eyes. "Yeah, it's great." He let
out a careful breath. She was his cousin, he reminded himself. Well,
a kind of cousin. And she was hardly more than a kid. "I, ah,
don't have a handkerchief or anything." "It's all right." Freddie
felt a drop roll down her cheek, but she didn't mind. After all,
these were the very best kind of tears. "Do you ever think about
having babies?" she asked with disarming candor. "Having—" Nick would
have stepped back then, way back, but the family was crowding him in.
"No," he said firmly, and made himself look away from her
damp, glowing face. "No way." "I do." She sighed and let
her head rest against his arm. Mikhail was whispering something to
Sydney that had her nodding and wiping away tears. Behind Freddie,
Natasha shifted Katie in her arms and turned to her husband. He had
one hand on Freddie's shoulder, and his sleeping son lay curved on
his own. "Every one is a miracle." He bent his head to kiss her damp
cheeks. "Just say the word anytime you decide you'd like another
miracle of our own." "I am a man blessed." Yuri
grabbed the closest body. It happened to be Bess's, and she found
herself whirled in a circle. "Two grandsons. Now three
granddaughters." He tossed Bess up. She came down laughing,
gripping his shoulders. . "Congratulations." She
pleased him enormously by kissing him firmly on the mouth.
"Grandpapa." "It's a good day." He reached
in his pocket. "Have a cigar."
Chapter 10
Contents - Prev/Next Rosalie considered herself an excellent
judge of people, and she had already decided Bess was one strange
lady. But she kept coming back. Sure, the money was good, Rosalie
thought as she sat drinking a diet soda in Bess's basement office.
And for a woman with a retirement plan, that had to be number one.
Yet it was more than making an extra buck that kept her taking the
trip up and across town several days each week. More, too, that kept
her hanging around after they finished what Bess liked to call
'consulting sessions.' Rosalie was human enough to get a
charge out of being connected, however remotely, to the entertainment
world. She couldn't deny that she'd been excited, awed and impressed
when she watched a couple of tapings. But there was another factor, a much
more basic one. Rosalie enjoyed Bess's company. Besides being a strange lady, Bess had
class. Rosalie didn't figure a person had to possess class to
recognize it in another. Class wasn't just a matter of
pedigree—though she'd discovered Bess had one. It was more than
having an old lady in the DAR, or an old man in Who's Who. It was
hazier than that. Though Rosalie couldn't quite come up with the
terms she wanted, she had recognized in Bess those rare and often
nebulous qualities, grace and compassion. She was procrastinating over taking the
trip back downtown by dawdling over her drink. Bess didn't seem to
mind if Rosalie hung around while she worked. In the few weeks since
they'd hooked up, Rosalie had noted that Bess worked hard and long.
Harder, in Rosalie's opinion, than she herself, or any of the other
ladies in her profession. Certainly Bess's hours were longer. It amused Rosalie to compare the two.
In fact, she and Bess had gotten into a very interesting discussion
on the similarities and differences between Bess's selling her mind
and Rosalie her body. What a kick that had been, Rosalie
thought now, while Bess typed and mumbled. Philosophical discussions
weren't the norm in Rosalie's world. The simple term she had not quite
grasped for their relationship was friendship. They had become
friends. "How late you gonna work?"
Rosalie asked, and Bess glanced up absently from the computer screen. "Oh… not much longer."
Her eyes were still slightly unfocused when she blew her hair away
from them. Brock was on the verge of seducing Jessica. "I just
had this idea for a little twist on a scene for tomorrow." She
smiled then. It was quick, and a little wicked. "Of course,
several members of the cast are going to want to murder me when I
toss this at them in the morning. But that's show biz." Rosalie took a drag on her cigarette.
"What time did you get in here this morning?" "Today? About nine-thirty. I was…"
She thought of Alex. "Running a little late." Lips pursed, Rosalie looked at the fake
designer watch on her wrist. "And it's after seven now."
Her grin flashed. "Girlfriend, you'd only put in half that many
hours in my line of work."' "Yeah, but I get to sit down."
Bess rubbed at the dull ache in the back of her neck. She really was
going to have to work on her posture. "Hungry?" she asked.
"Want to order something in?" With a little tug of regret, Rosalie
stabbed out the cigarette. "No. I gotta get to work, too." "You could take the night off."
Casually Bess ran a finger lightly over the keyboard. "Maybe we
could catch a movie." Chuckling, Rosalie dug in her purse for
a mirror to check her makeup. "You said you weren't going to try
to reform me." "I lied." Bess sat back in
her chair while Rosalie painted her mouth bloodred. She'd tried very
hard not to pontificate, not to pressure, not to preach. And thought
she had succeeded. But she hadn't tried not to care. That would have
been useless. "I really worry about you. Especially since the
last murder." The odd twisting in Rosalie's stomach
had her shifting her eyes from her compact mirror to Bess. She
couldn't remember if anyone had ever worried about her before.
Certainly not in years. "Didn't I tell you I could take care of
myself?" "Yes, but—" "No buts about it, honey."
With a second dip into her purse, Rosalie pulled out a stiletto. One
flick of the wrist, and the long, razor-sharp blade zipped out. "What
I can't handle, this can." Bess managed to close her mouth, but
her eyes stayed riveted to the knife. In the overhead lights, it
gleamed silver, bright as sudden death. She couldn't say it was
elegant. But it was fascinating, deathly fascinating. "Can I?" With a shrug of her shoulders, Rosalie
passed the weapon to her. "Don't mess with the blade," she
warned. "It's as sharp as it looks." Bess took a good grip on the handle,
twisting her wrist this way and that, like a fencer. She wondered if
Jade/Josie might carry one. She was already imagining a scene where
the tormented Jade found the knife—maybe with the blade smeared
with blood—in one of her practical handbags. No, her briefcase.
Better. "Have you ever—" "Not yet." Rosalie held out a
hand to take it back. "But there's always a first time."
She pressed the button, and the blade whisked away again. "So
don't loose any sleep over me." After dropping the weapon back
into her bag, she took out an atomizer and sprayed scent generously
on her skin. The air bloomed with roses. "Couple more months,
I'll have enough put away. I'm going to be spending the winter in the
Florida sunshine while you slog through duty snow." She rose,
tugging her tight off-the-shoulder top provocatively down, so that
the rise of her breasts swelled invitingly over it. "See you
around." "Wait." Bess scrambled
through her own purse and came up with her mini recorder. "If it
won't bother your ethics, I thought you might use this." At
Rosalie's wry glance, Bess's cheeks heated. "I don't mean to
record that part. Just the streets, conversations with the other
women, maybe a couple of, ah… transactions." "You're the boss." Taking the
recorder, Rosalie slipped it away. "Be careful," Bess added,
though she knew Rosalie would laugh. She did, sending a last cocky look over
her bare shoulder. "Girlfriend, I'm always careful." Still chuckling, Rosalie headed down
the narrow corridor toward the freight elevator. She was already
picturing the way Bess's eyes would pop out when she listened to the
tape and discovered that her "consultant" had recorded everything. The prospect of pulling
such a fine joke had her grinning as the doors slid open. Her
amusement died a quick death when Alex walked off. While they eyed each other with mutual
suspicion, Alex pressed two fingers to the Door Open button. "How's
the moonlighting going, Rosalie?" "It passes the time." When she started past him, he raised an
arm to block the elevator opening. "What do you know about
Crystal LaRue?" "I know she's dead." Rosalie
fisted a hand on her hip, cocked it. "Something else you want?" Alex let her see that her snide
invitation only amused him. "What do you know about her before
she was dead?" "Nothing." She would have
given him the same answer if she'd been Crystal's most intimate
friend, but as it was, she was telling the simple truth. "I
never met her. Heard she was new, didn't have a man yet." "Now, I heard that, too,"
Alex said conversationally. "And I heard that Bobby wanted to
make her one of his wives." "Maybe. Bobby likes to start them
young." Alex struggled with his disgust. She'd
been seventeen, he thought. A runaway who hadn't know the rules and
would never have a chance to learn them. "Did Bobby roust her,
put on the pressure?" "Can't say." "Can't say? Or won't?" Rosalie opened the hand on her hip and
began to drum her fingers there. "Listen, I don't know what
Bobby did. I've been keeping out of his way lately." Saying nothing, Alex studied her face.
The bruising had faded. "Seems to me Bess is paying you enough
that you could stay out of his way altogether." "That's my business." "And hers," Alex said evenly.
"I don't want him finding out about this sideline of yours and
going after her." His eyes were cold and passionless. "Then
I'd have to kill him." "You think I'd turn Bobby on to
her?" Arrogance was sidelined as fury snapped into Rosalie's
voice. "I owe her." "What?" "Respect," she said, with an
innate and graceful dignity that had Alex softening. "She had me
eat at her table. She even said I could stay in her extra bedroom.
Like a guest." Her lips thinned at Alex's expression. "Don't
sweat it, honey. I didn't take her up on it. Sure, she's paying me,
and maybe you don't think that's any different than me taking money
from some slob off the street. But she treats me like somebody. Not
some thing, somebody." Embarrassed by her own vehemence, she
shrugged. "She doesn't have the sense not to." "She's got sense, all right. Not
all good." Alex's lips twitched, even as Rosalie's did. "Maybe
she hasn't gone so wrong here. I just don't want her hurt." "Neither do I." Rosalie
tapped a scarlet nail on his chest. "You got a bad case, cop.
Stars in your eyes." The little wisp of envy came and went,
almost unnoticed. "Make sure you keep them in hers, or you'll
answer to me." His grin flashed before he could
prevent it. The charm of it nearly had Rosalie changing her mind
about cops. "Yes, ma'am." Like Bess, he wanted to say
something that would stop her from going back on the streets. Unlike
Bess, he accepted that there was nothing that would do it. "Maybe I see why she's so stuck on
you." When he moved his blocking arm, she stepped into the
elevator, turned. "You be good to her, Stanislaski. She deserves
good." The elevator doors clunked shut. Alex
stood studying them a moment before he turned and wandered down the
corridor to find Bess. She was bent over the keys, rapping out
a machine-gun fire of words onto the monitor. Her fingers moved like
lightning, but her eyes were far away. In Millbrook, he thought,
smiling to himself. She had her legs crossed under her, up
on the chair. The way her shoulders were hunched, he imagined her
muscles would complain loudly the moment she came back to earth. She was wearing a skirt again, a little
leather number in bold blue that was hiked high up on her thighs. The
hot-pink blouse she'd tucked into it should have clashed with her
hair, but it didn't. The blouse looked like silk and was carelessly
shoved up to her elbows. A half-dozen gold bracelets clanged at her
wrist as she worked. Rings flashed on her fingers, and the big Gypsy
hoops she wore at her ears peeked out of her tousled hair. His heart ached with love for her. And
his loins… Alex let out a little breath. He wanted, quite
simply, to devour her. Inch by delicious inch. What the hell was he going to do, he
wondered, when she tried to slither out of his life? He was sure she
would, as she'd done with others before. He could lock her up, carry
her off. He could beg or threaten. He already knew he would do
whatever he had to in order to keep her in his life. What had ever made him think he would
one day find some nice, pretty woman with simple tastes and a quiet
style? Someone who would be content to sit home while he worked his
crazy hours? Who would have and help him raise the houseful of
children he so badly wanted? With Bess, nothing was simple, nothing
was quiet. She would never be content to sit home but would badger
him incessantly, picking at him until he gave in and talked about the
darker aspects of his work, those pieces of his life that he wanted
to keep locked away from everyone who mattered. As for children…
He didn't know how the devil to get and keep a ring on her finger,
much less ask her to help make a family. Being in love with her left him
helpless, made him stupid, brought him a kind of fear he'd never
faced as a cop. Not fear for his life. Fear for his heart. He could only take his own advice and
leave things as they were. Handle each day until she was so used to
him she'd want to stay. As he watched, she stopped typing,
lifted a hand to her neck for a quick, impatient rub. Her skirt hiked
higher as she shifted. It took all his control not to lick his lips.
She punched a few buttons, had the machine clicking. A moment later,
the printer beside her began to hum. With a smile on his face and lust in
his heart, Alex closed the door quietly at his back. Locked it. She jumped like a rabbit when his hands
came down on her shoulders. "Didn't anyone ever teach you to sit
in a chair?" "Alexi." She pressed a hand
to her galloping heart. "You scared—Oh…" Her
sigh was long and heartfelt as he massaged away the aches. "That's
wonderful." "You're going to do permanent
damage if you keep sitting like that all day." "I was planning on soaking in a
hot tub for two or three days." She leaned into his hands. "Where's Lori?" "She wasn't feeling too terrific."
As the printer continued to rattle, Bess closed her eyes. "I
told her I was leaving, too. Then I snuck back. I wanted to make a
few changes for tomorrow." She brought her hand up to one of
his, skimming her fingers over it to the wrist. "You said you
might have to work late." "Lead fizzled. We'll work on
tracing the heart necklace down, but that's better during business
hours." "Trace it down?" "Hit the jewelers," he
explained, "see if we can track down to when it was bought. Long
shot, but…". "Do you think the heart has a
personal meaning for him?" "Like some woman broke his heart,
so he gives them a symbol of it before he whacks them?" He gave
a little grunt as he continued to knead her muscles. "It's a
little too obvious to dismiss. Psychiatric profile figures him as
sexually inadequate on a normal level, so he pays for women to
perform. He wants them and detests himself for that, as much as he
detests them for being available. The fact that he goes through a
short courtship routine shows that—" He broke off as she
reached for a pad. "Hold on, McNee." He gave her shoulders
a hard squeeze. "I don't know how you do it. One minute I'm
thinking about getting you out of these clothes and the next you've
got me talking about a case." He pressed a kiss to the top of
her head. "No notes." Her fingers retreated from the pad, but
with obvious reluctance. "I like hearing you talk about your
work. I want you to be able to talk to me about anything." "Apparently I can. Even the stuff
I don't want you to hear. I've got a problem with you, Bess. You
won't let me tuck you into that nice safe comer where I want you to
be." "You only think that's where you
want me to be." Smiling, she tugged his hand around so that she
could kiss it. "You like me right where I am." Turning his
hand over, she pressed her lips to his palm. "I'm going to stay
there." She felt his fingers tense, then relax
slowly as he spread them over her cheek. "I was watching you
while you worked." A rippling thrill raced through her at
the words and at the shimmer of desire she heard in them. "Were
you?" "And thinking." His hands
slid down over her breasts, sampled their weight, molded them.
"Fantasizing." Her head fell back against the chair.
Her breathing quickened. "About?" "The things I'd like to do with
you." Through layers of silk, he caught her nipples, tugging
gently. "To you." When she tried to shift in the chair to
face him, he increased the pressure, held her still. Her dazzled eyes
focused on the monitor. She could still see the ghost of herself
there, and his hands moving. Sliding. Stroking. Impossibly erotic to see, and to feel.
Dry-mouthed, she watched his fingers undo her buttons and saw the
dark shadow of his hair as he pressed a hot mouth to her throat. She
lifted a hand, hooked it around his neck as she tilted her head to
offer more. "I can shut down in thirty
seconds." He bit her lightly, just above the
collarbone. "I'm not going to give you a chance to shut down." She laughed shakily, even as she lifted
her other arm to capture him in a reverse embrace. "I meant the
computer." He would have laughed himself, but he'd
stopped breathing. "I know what you meant." "But I—" He slipped a
hand under her skirt, and it was so sudden, so searing. Before she
could gasp out in shock, he had driven her ruthlessly to the peak. "I watched you." Each word
burned his throat as she poured into his hand. "I wanted you."
Half demented, he whipped her up again, pressing his face into her
neck as her body shuddered, shuddered. "Do you remember the
first time I found you here?" "What?" She couldn't remember
her own name. There was only this need he was ruthlessly building
inside her again. "Alexi, please. Come home with me. I need—"
This time she cried out as the third high, hard wave swamped her. "I wanted you then." In one
violent move, he spun her chair around and dragged her to her feet,
and her already weakened system went limp at what she read in his
face. "Let me show you exactly what I wanted." This wasn't the smooth and patient
lover of the night before. This man with the fierce eyes and bruising
hands wouldn't cuddle her and whisper exotic endearments. This was
the warrior she'd only glimpsed. He would plunder. Whether or not she
was ready, he was showing her that dark, reckless side of him that he
kept so tightly controlled. In the moment when he stared at her,
the look in his eyes hot and concentrated, she understood that
excitement took a twist into the primitive when it carried a touch of
fear. He fisted a hand in her hair and yanked
her against him. His body was like rock, vibrating from deep within,
as if from an erupting volcano. For that moment, there was only the
strength and the fury of the inevitable. His mouth burned over hers, his tongue
diving deep, while his free hand tugged the snap of her skirt free.
He wanted her flesh, craved it. That heated silk, those alluring
curves and taut muscles. Time and place had lost all impact. There
was only here. Only now. Only her. Shivery fingers of fear ran up her
spine. She hadn't known what it was to be wanted this way. It was so
huge, so violent, so glorious. Before, he had given her more than she
had ever dreamed of. Now, he seemed compelled to give her more than
she had ever dared dream. Beside them, the printer stopped its
practical clatter and dropped into a hum. The low, waiting sound was
drowned out by the thundering of her heart. The bright working lights
overhead seemed to dim as he took her hips and pressed her hard
against him. "You make a war inside me,"
he muttered as his teeth scraped roughly down her throat. "There's
no end to it. No peace from it. Say my name. I want to hear you say
my name." "Alexi." When his lips
crushed down on hers again, he felt her breathe it, warm, into his
mouth. "Take me. Now." The wild need slammed into her so that
her mouth was as turbulent, her hands as frantic. Dozens of tiny
explosions burst inside her body, merging into one huge tumult of
sensation that battered, bruised and bewitched. She was all but
sobbing with it as she tugged and pulled at his clothes. She was quivering for him. Couldn't
stop. The power and pressure growing inside her was all but
unbearable. And the heat, the furnace blast of heat, had her skin
slicked and her head spinning. Glorying in it, she brought her mouth
to his bare shoulder, savoring the taste of flesh. His busy, bruising
hands had her bearing down with teeth and nails. His breath hissed in
her ear as she reached down to curl impatient fingers around him. Confused and tangled phrases whirled in
his mind. He heard them burst from his lips to hang on the thick air
as he fought to catch his breath. On an oath, he gripped her
shoulders and hauled her back. Her face was flushed, her eyes were
glowing. He'd marked that ivory skin. He could see where his fingers
had pressed, where his roughened cheeks had scraped. But the part of
him that would have been shocked by his lack of care was far
overshadowed by a dark and desperate desire to conquer, to consume.
To mate. He saw them now as brands, signs that
made her his. Only his. With a jerk of his head, he tossed his
hair back. The way it swayed and settled had new emotion burning her
throat. Naked, muscles bunched as if to fight, he looked so
magnificent he dazzled her eyes. Then he looked at her, and the smile
that had nearly formed on her face froze into wonder. "No one makes you feel like this
but me." His accent had thickened, and the sound
of it sent chills along her heated skin. She could only shake her
head. "No one touches you like me."
He took his hands from her shoulders and gripped the bodice of her
chemise. "No one has you, ever again, but me." "Alexi—" But he shook his head. He could feel
her heart pounding under his hands, and his own chest was heaving.
"Understand me. You're mine now." Her eyes widened with
shock as he jerked his hands and ripped the chemise in half. "All
of you." He pushed her back against the table,
watching the play of stunned excitement over her face. Yes, he wanted
to excite her. And shock her. Stagger her. His fingers dug into her hips as he
lifted her. He was braced, straining like a stallion at the bit.
"Hold on to me," he demanded, but her fluttering hands slid
off his sweat-slick arms. His breath heaved out, his fingers dug into
her smooth, taut flesh. "Hold!" She met his eyes then, and felt that
wild whip of power. Drunk on it, she gripped his hair and wrapped her
legs around him. When he plunged inside her, her body arched back,
absorbing that first rocketing flash of heat. It was like being
consumed from the inside out. She felt the cool surface of the table
against her back first, then his weight on her. Greedy for more, she
tightened around him, matching his fast, frantic rhythm, dragging his
mouth back to hers so that they could echo the intimacy with their
tongues. He lost himself. There was only her
now, and the need to possess her. The desperate craving to be
possessed by her. Images reeled through his brain, all dark and
sharp-edged, until he thought he would go mad. And went mad. In a frenzy of movement, he dragged her
farther onto the table, crushing papers, knocking aside empty cups,
scattering pencils. He couldn't take his eyes from her face, the way
her eyes clouded, like fog over moss, the way her lips trembled with
each gasping breath. There was a bloom on her skin now, a rose under
glass. He was hammering himself into her, empowered by a rabid fury
of emotion that had its razor-tipped fingers around his throat. Too much, she thought frantically.
Never enough. The harsh overhead lights fractured into rainbows that
blinded her eyes. They seemed to arch around his head, but she didn't
think of angels. His eyes were so dark, so fiercely focused. Even as
her own grew leaden, she refused to close them. Oh, to watch him wanting her. Taking
her. She couldn't understand the words he
murmured, over and over again. But she understood what was in those
eyes. They were tearing each other apart, and they couldn't stop. The
animal had taken over, and it had diamond-sharp claws and jagged
teeth. There was nothing left but the sound of
their mixed labored breathing, the solid slap of flesh against flesh,
and the heady scent of hot, desperate sex. She felt his body go rigid, felt the
rippling muscles in the arms she gripped turn to stone. He groaned
out her name as his eyes sharpened like daggers. When he poured
himself into her, she cried out in triumph, then again in wonder as
he drove her over that crumbling edge with him. The strength that had screamed through
him switched off like a light, and he collapsed, panting, his full
weight on her. Fighting for breath, he wallowed in her hair, drawing
in the scent of it and the fragrance they'd made together. He
couldn't find his center, the focus that was so vital for survival.
He no longer had one without her. God, he could feel her vibrating
beneath him, shuddering from the aftershocks. And there were tears
mixed with the dew of sweat on her face. With breath still burning his lungs, he
levered himself on his elbows and shook his head to try to clear it.
At the movement, she made a small, whimpering sound in her throat
that both aroused and dismayed. Trying to find the gentleness that
had always been so easy for him, he shifted their positions and began
to stroke her hair, her shoulders, her back. Murmuring apologies, he cradled her
like a child. "Milaya, I'm sorry. I hurt you. I must have hurt
you. Don't cry." "I'm not crying." But, of
course, she was. He could feel the tears fall even as she ran kisses
over his face and throat. "Just tell me you love me. Please tell
me you love me." "I love you. Shh." He covered
her mouth tenderly with his. "You know I love you." "I love you." She pressed
those wet, shaky kisses to his cheeks, to his jaw. "You have to
believe that I love you." A hot fist clenched in his gut, but he
kept his hands gentle. "Just let me hold you." Tearing up again, she pressed her face
to his shoulder. "Even now you don't believe me. Alexi, what
more can I do?" "I believe you." But they
both knew he said it only to comfort. "You belong to me. I
believe that." "You're everything I want."
She relaxed against him, satisfied that he would take that much. "No more tears?" "No." He tilted her chin up to search her
face. "How badly did I hurt you?" "I don't think the results will be
in for days." She smiled a little. "How badly did I hurt
you?" His eyes narrowed, and her smile
widened. "You're not… upset?" "About what?" "I was an animal." With a
hand that had yet to steady, he brushed her tumbled hair out of her
face. "I took you on a table like a lunatic." "I know." After one long,
satisfied sigh, she slid her body lazily over his. "It was
wonderful." "Yes?" Guilt began to turn to
pride. "You liked it?" After being so thoroughly ravished, it
wasn't difficult to stroke his ego. "It was like being dragged
off by some barbarian. I couldn't even understand what you were
saying. It was exciting." She kissed his cheek. "Frightening."
And the other. "It was also the most erotic experience of my
life." "You were crying." "Alexi." She touched a hand
to his face. "You didn't just overpower me. You overwhelmed me.
No one's ever made me feel more wanted. More irresistible." "I can't resist you, but I'm sorry
I put bruises on you." "I don't mind—under the
circumstances." After another luxurious sigh, she glanced around
the room. "I don't know how I'll ever work in here again,
though." Now he grinned, wickedly. "Maybe
it'll inspire you." "There is that." She shifted
to straddle him and watched his sleepy eyes skim down to her breasts
and back. Possibilities, she thought. There were definite
possibilities in that look. "Being a cop, I imagine you've been
through arduous physical training." The possibilities had occurred to him,
as well. "Absolutely." "And you'd probably have amazing
recuperative powers." His brow lifted. "Under the right
conditions." "Good." To be certain she
created them, she ran her hands over his still-gleaming chest. With a half laugh, he caught her
wrists. "McNee, wouldn't you rather pick this up in bed?" For an answer, she leaned over, letting
her lips hover a breath away from his. The tip of her tongue darted
out to trace the shape of his mouth, to dip teasingly inside, then
retreat. Slowly, she tilted her head. Softly, she tasted his lips.
Achingly, achingly, she deepened the kiss. "Does that give you a clue,
Detective?"
Chapter 11
Contents - Prev/Next "I can't believe you want to spend
the best part of a Saturday morning in a sweaty gym." Alex was
stalling, even as he walked with Bess up the iron steps that led to
Rocky's. , "It's your sweaty gym," Bess
said, and kissed him. The past few days had been almost like
a honeymoon, she thought. If she took out the hours they'd both been
at work. But they'd made the most of what time they'd had together,
snuggling on the couch in her place, cooking a meal in his, wrestling
in bed in both. She was starting to hope that he
believed she loved him. And, once he did, she wanted nothing more
than for them to take that next step. The step that would lead to an
authentic honeymoon, with all the trimmings. "You picked me up at my gym
yesterday," she pointed out. "That wasn't a gym." There
was the faintest trace of a masculine sneer in his voice. "That
was an exercise palace. Fancy lighting, piped-in music. All those
mirrors." "At least I'll be able to see when
my butt starts to drop." He gave it a friendly pat. "I'll
let you know." "Do, and die," she said
smartly, and pushed through the frosted glass doors. She immediately thought of every bad
boxing film she'd ever seen. The huge room echoed with grunts and
slaps and thumps. It smelled of mildew and sweat and… She took
a testing sniff and decided she didn't want to know what else. There
were exposed pipes along the ceilings and walls, and there was a
hardwood floor that looked as though it had been gouged by spikes.
The boxing ring that was set up in one corner was already occupied by
two compact, dancing men in tiny shorts who were trying to pop each
other in the eye. A trio of punching bags hung at
strategic points. A half-naked man with a body like a cement truck
was currently trying to whip the tar out of one of them. Weights were being employed as well.
She watched tendons bulge and muscles bunch. They didn't worry about mirrors and
lighting here. Nor did she spot any of the high-tech equipment she
was accustomed to. This was down-and-dirty—squat, sweat and
punch. She sincerely doubted there would be a juice bar in the
vicinity, either. "Had enough?" Alex asked. He
was obviously amused at the thought of her stripping down to her
leotard and having a go with the boys. Bess closed her mouth, then answered
his grin with a cool stare. "I haven't even started yet." It was his turn to drop his jaw when
she peeled off her sweatshirt. Beneath she wore a snug, low-cut crop
top in zigzagging stripes of green and purple. As she shimmied out of
her baggy street shorts, he shoved the discarded shirt in front of
her. "Come on, Bess, put your clothes
on. Sweet Lord." The bottom half was worse. Over formfitting
tights she had on a teeny strip of spandex that covered little more
than a G-string. "You can't wear that in here." "Is it illegal?" She bent
over to stuff her sweats into her gym bag and heard the heavy thump
of weights as they were dropped. Maintaining position, she turned her
head and smiled at the pop-eyed man staring at her. The catcalls and whistles started
immediately, the sound swelling and bouncing off the cinder-block
walls. Alex was very much afraid there would be a riot—one he
was likely to incite himself. "Damn it, put something on before
I have to kill somebody." "They look harmless." She
straightened again and lifted her arms to tie the short curls at the
nape of her neck into a stubby ponytail. "Anyway, I came to work
out." With a challenging grin, she flexed a muscle. "How
much can you bench-press?" "McNee, don't you dare—"
He broke off with an oath as she blithely strolled across the room to
chat with the weight lifter. The two hundred pounds of muscle began
to babble like a teenager. Alex had no choice but to send out a
warning snarl, much as a guard dog might to a pack of encroaching
wolves, before he went after her. She pulled it off, of course. He should
have known she would. The men started out drooling, kicked over into
laughing and finally wound up competing with each other to show her
the proper way to perform squat lifts, chin-ups and leg curls. Before an hour was over, she'd been
shown pictures of wives and children, listened to sob stories over
sweethearts and stopped being ogled—unless it was at a discreet
distance. "You sure you want to do this?"
Alex asked again, tapping his gloved hands together. "Absolutely." She smiled at
Rocky as he himself laced up her gloves. "I couldn't leave
without one sparring match." "You watch out for his left—it's
a good one," Rocky advised her. "Kid could've been a
contender if he hadn't wanted to be a cop." She winked at Rocky. "I've got
fast feet. He won't lay a glove on me." Two of her new admirers held open the
ropes for her so that she could step into the ring. Enjoying the
sensation, she adjusted her padded helmet. "Aren't we supposed
to wear those funny retainers?" "The what—Oh, mouth guards?"
He couldn't resist, and he leaned over and kissed her to an
accompaniment of hoots. "Baby, I'm not going to hit you."
In a friendly gesture, he tapped his gloves to hers. "Okay, put
your hands up." When she did, lifting them toward the ceiling,
he rolled his eyes. "It's not an arrest, McNee." Patiently
he adjusted her hands until they were in a defensive position. "Now, you want to guard, see? Keep
your left up, keep it up. If I come in like this—" he did
a slow-motion jab at her jaw "—you block, jab back. That's
it." "And I fake with my left,"
she said, and did so. "If you want." Lord, she was
sweet. "Now try for here." He tapped his own chin. "Go
ahead, you don't have to pull it." "When she punched halfheartedly,
he shook his head. "No, you punch like a girl. Put your body
behind it. Pretend I'm Dawn Gallagher." Her eyes lit, and she swung full-out,
only to come up solidly against his block. "Hey, that's good."
Impressed, she swung again. "But I've got to move around, right?
Fake you out with my grace and fancy footwork." She did a quick boogie that had the
onlookers clapping and Alex grinning at her. "You got style.
Let's work on it." He was enjoying himself, showing her
the moves. And it certainly didn't hurt for a woman living in the
city to learn how to defend herself with something more than an
ammonia-filled water pistol. "It's fun." She ducked her
head as he'd shown her and tried two quick jabs with her left. "Always room for another
flyweight," Rocky called out to her. "Come on, Bess, body
blow." Chuckling, she aimed for Alex's
midsection and dodged his light tap toward her chin. "You look
so cute in gym shorts," she murmured. "Don't try to distract me." "Well, you do." She danced
around him again, and, laughing, he turned toward her. "Okay, that ought to—"
He ended on a grunt when she connected hard with his jaw and set him
down on his butt. "Oh, God." She crouched
instantly, battering his face with her gloves as she tried to stroke
it. "Oh, Alexi, I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?" He wiggled his jaw, sending her a dark
look. "Right cross," he muttered as men climbed through the
ropes to cheer and hold Bess's arms in the air. "I'm really sorry," Bess said
again as they started down the iron steps. But she was fingering the
little bit of tarnished metal Rocky had pinned—with some
ceremony—to her sweatshirt. "You said not to pull my
punches." "I know what I said." He'd be
lucky if he didn't have a bruise, Alex thought. And how the hell
would he explain that? "You only got through because I was
finished." She ran her tongue over her teeth and
stepped outside. "Uh-huh." "Don't get smart with me, McNee."
He snatched her up and swung her around. "Or I'll demand a
rematch." Wildly in love, she tossed her arms
around his neck. "Anytime." "Oh, yeah? How about…"
He trailed off with a grimace as his beeper sounded. "Sorry." "It's all right." She only
sighed a little as he tracked down a phone and called in. As she
stood beside him, watching his face, listening to his terse comments,
she realized that their plans for a picnic in the park and some
casual shopping were about to go bust. "You have your cop's face on,"
she said when he hung up. "Do you have to go in?" "Yeah." But he didn't tell
her they'd found another victim. It was bad enough that he was
spoiling their plans for the day. "It's probably going to take a
while. I'm really sorry, Bess." "Look." She framed his face
with her hands. "I understand. This is part of it." He brought those hands to his lips.
"I…" But he didn't tell her he loved her, because
she would echo the words, and it made him nervous to hear them. "I
appreciate it," he said instead. "And I'll make it up to
you." "Tell you what—why don't I
finish up what I have to do, then stop by the market? I'll make
dinner. Something that won't spoil if it has to be wanned up a couple
of times." Though his mind was already drifting
away from her, he managed a pained smile. "You're going to
cook." "I'm not that bad. I'm not,"
she insisted with a bit of a huff when he grinned. "I only
burned the potatoes the other night because you kept distracting me." "I guess it's the least I can do."
He kissed her lightly once, then again, longer. "I'll try to
call." "If you can." She waved him
off, then stood watching while he jogged down into the subway. With a
quick laugh, she spun around, hugging herself. She felt just like a cop's wife. "I hope you don't mind me dropping
by." "Of course not." Rachel took
a look at the bulging shopping bags in Bess's hands. "Been
busy?" "Whenever I get started with that
little plastic card, I can't seem to stop." She dumped her
purchases inside the apartment door. "You look wonderful. How
can you look wonderful less than a week after going through
childbirth?" "Strong genes." Pleased in
general, and with Bess in particular, Rachel kissed her on both
cheeks. "Come sit down." "Thanks. I—Oops." She
dipped into the bag and pulled out a gold foiled candy box. "For
Mom." "Oh." Rachel's eyes took on
the glow a woman's get when she looks at a lover—or a
five-pound box of exclusive chocolates. "I think you just became
my best friend." Chuckling, Bess dug into the bags
again. "Well, I know that people tend to drop by with baby
gifts." She held out a box wrapped in snowy white with bright
red lollipops scattered over it. "And, though I couldn't resist
the tradition, I figured you deserved something really sinful for
yourself." "I do." Rachel tucked the
baby box under her other arm. "It's really sweet of you, Bess,
and unnecessary. You and Alex already brought Brenna that wonderful
stuffed dragon." "That was from us. This is from
me. It's a girl thing. I saw this tiny little white organdy dress
with all these flounces and little pink bows and I couldn't resist." Rachel's new-mother's heart melted.
"Really?" "I figure in another year she
might want to wear motorcycle boots, so this may be your only chance
to play dress-up." "I swore that whatever I had, I
wouldn't make sexist decisions in dress or attitude." She sighed
over the box. "White organdy?" "Six flounces. I counted." "I can't wait to put her in it." "Ah, company.'' Mikhail strode out
of the bedroom with Brenna tucked in his arm. "Hello,
Aunt Bess." He kissed both of her cheeks, then her mouth. "You said you wouldn't wake her
up." This from Rachel, who was already leaning over to coo. "I didn't. Exactly. What's this?"
Recognizing the gold foil box, he flipped it open and dived in. "Mine," Rachel said in a
huff. "If you eat more than one, I'll break your fingers." "She was always greedy," he
said over the first piece. "Where's Alexi?" "He got called in." "Good. Now you have time to sit
down. I'll sketch you." "Now?" Womanlike, Bess lifted
a hand to her hair. "I'm not exactly dressed for it." "I want your face." Obviously
well used to making himself at home, he opened the drawer on an end
table and rummaged for a pad. "Perhaps I'll do your body later.
It's a good one." Her laugh was quick. "Thanks." "You might as well cooperate,"
Rachel told her, and crossed over to take the baby. "Once the
artist in htm takes over, you haven't got a chance." "I'm flattered, really." "There's no reason to be," he
said absently as he unearthed a suitable pencil. "You have the
face you were bom with." "Thank God that's not always
true." That caught his interest. "You had
it fixed?" "No. I just sort of grew into it." "Not there," he told her
before Bess could sit. "Over there, closer to the window in the
light. Rachel, when do I get the drink you promised me?" "On its way." She stopped
nuzzling Brenna long enough to look up. "What can I get you,
Bess?" "Anything cold—and a shot at
holding the baby." "I can accommodate you on both
counts." Rachel laid her daughter gently in Bess's arms. "She
hardly ever cries. And I think her eyes may stay blue. Like Zack's." "She's a beauty." Bess leaned
down to brush her lips over the curling dark hair and to draw in the
indescribably sweet scent of baby. "Like all of you." "Move," Mikhail ordered his
sister. "You're in my way." Shooting off a mild Ukrainian insult,
she headed for the kitchen. "Talk if you like." Mikhail
gestured with his pencil; and began to sketch. "It's one of my best things."
She'd already forgotten to be self-conscious. "Where's Sydney
and Griff?" "Griff has the sniffles." The
pencil was moving with quick, deft strokes over the pad. "Sydney
fusses over him, but she says I'm fussing over him and sends me out
on errands." "Which he does by coming by and
plaguing me," Rachel called out. "She's happy to see me,"
Mikhail said. "Because she's lonely, with Zack and Nick over
checking on the progress of the new apartment." "Oh, that's right, you're moving."
Comfortable, Bess tucked up her legs. "Alexi mentioned it." "We need a bigger place. Of
course, it was supposed to be ready a month ago, but things never run
on time. I'll miss this one," she said, coming back in with a
tray of cold drinks. "And having Nick underfoot. But I imagine
he'll like having this place to himself." Bess reached for her drink with her
free hand, gently jiggling the baby with the other. "I guess he
had as big a crush on you as Freddie has on him." For a moment, Rachel only stared. Then
she let out her breath in a quiet laugh. "Alex said you saw
things." "Just part of the job." Rachel didn't consider herself a slouch
in the readingpeople department. "So, how big a crush do you
have on Alexi?" "The biggest." Bess smiled
and rubbed her cheek over Brenna's. "He thinks I'm flighty.
Fickle. But I'm not. Not with him." "Why would he think that?" "I have a varied track record. But
it's different with him." When Bess lowered her head to murmur
to the baby, Rachel glanced at her brother. They exchanged a great
deal without uttering a word. "It makes me envy people like your
sister, Natasha," Bess went on. "Those three beautiful
children, a husband who after years together still looks at her as if
he can't believe she belongs to him. Work she loves. I envy all
that." "You'd like a family?" "I never had one." Rachel knew it was the lawyer in her,
but she couldn't help moving along the line of questioning. "Does
it bother you that he's a cop?" "Bother me?" Bess's brows
lifted in surprise. "No. Do you mean, will I worry? I suppose I
will. But it's not something I could change, or that I want to
change. I love who he is." "He's making you sad,"
Mikhail said quietly. "No." Bess's denial was quick
enough to startle the dozing baby. She soothed her automatically as
she shook her head. "No, of course he isn't." "I see what's in your eyes." He would, she realized, and felt the
warmth creep into her cheeks. "It's only that I know he doesn't
trust me—my feelings. Or, I suppose, the endurance of my
feelings. It's not his fault." "He was always one to pick things
apart." There was brotherly disgust in Mikhail's voice. "Never
one to take anything on faith. I'll speak to him." "Oh, no." This time, she
laughed. "He'd be furious with both of us. All that Slavic pride
and male ego." Instantly Mikhail's eyes narrowed.
"What's wrong with that?" "Nothing." She grinned at
Rachel. "Not a thing. I'll just wear him down in my own way. In
fact, I'm going to start tonight. I'm cooking dinner. I thought maybe
I could call your mother, find out if he has a favorite dish." "I can tell you that," Rachel
offered. "Anything." "Well, that certainly widens my
choices. Do you think she'd mind if I called her, asked for some
pointers? My kitchen skills are moderate at best." "She'd love it." Rachel
smiled to herself, knowing her mother would hang up the phone and
immediately start planning the wedding. It was after midnight when Alex let
himself into Bess's apartment with the key she'd given him. He was
punchy with fatigue, and his head was buzzing from too much coffee.
Those were usual things, as much a part of his work as filing reports
or following a lead. But the sick weight in his stomach was something
new. He would have to tell her. She'd left the television on. In an old
black-and-white movie a woman screamed in abject terror and fled down
a moonlit beach. As he shrugged out of his jacket, Alex moved across
the room to switch it off. Before he reached the set, he saw her,
curled on the couch. She'd waited for him. The sweetness of
that speared through him as he crouched beside her. For so many years
now, he'd come home alone, to no one. Gently he brushed the dark red
curls from her cheek and replaced them with his lips. She stirred,
murmuring. Her eyes fluttered open. "I'm just going to carry you into
bed," he whispered. "Go back to sleep." "Alexi." She lifted a hand to
rub over the cheek he hadn't shaved that morning. Her voice was thick
with sleep, her eyes glazed with it. "What time is it?" "It's late. You should have gone
to bed." She made a vague sound of disagreement
and pushed up on one elbow. "I was waiting up, but the movie was
so bad." Her laugh was groggy, and she rubbed her eyes like a
child. "It zapped me." She circled her shoulders before
leaning forward to kiss him. "You had a long day, Detective." "Yeah." And maybe, because
she was half-asleep, he could put off the rest. "So have you.
I'll cart you in." "No, I'm okay." She sat up,
yawning. "Did you eat something?" "I caught a sandwich. I'm really
sorry, I tried to call." "And got the machine," she
said with a rueful nod. "Because I'd forgotten the paprika and
had to run back out to the market." "You cooked?" The idea both
touched him and accented his guilt. "I amazed myself." It felt
good to settle against him when he joined her on the couch and
slipped an arm around her. Cozy, right, and wonderfully simple. "Your
mother's recipe for chicken and dumplings—Hungarian-style." "Csirke paprikas?" Normally
it would have made his mouth water. "That's a lot of work." "It was a culinary adventure—and
the cleaning lady will probably quit on Monday, after one look at the
kitchen." She laughed up at him, then scrubbed her knuckles over
his cheek when she caught the look in his eyes. "Don't worry.
It'll heat up just fine for tomorrow's lunch. Then again…"
She snuggled closer. "If you're feeling really guilty, I'll take
you up on that ride to the bedroom—and whatever else you can
think of." But instead of chuckling and scooping
her up, he pushed away to pace to the television and snap it off. "We
have to talk." His tone had nerves skittering in her
stomach, but she nodded. "All right." He thought it might be best—for
both of them—if they had some of the brandy she had offered him
during an earlier crisis. Trying out the words in his head, he walked
to the lacquered cabinet. "It's bad," she murmured and
pressed her lips together, hard. Her first thought was that he had
changed his mind about her. That he had finally taken that good look
she'd been afraid of and realized his mistake. "It's bad," he concurred,
then brought the snifters to the couch. "Here. Drink a little." "It's all right. I don't make
scenes." He tilted the brandy toward her lips
himself. "Just a little, milaya." She closed her eyes and did as he
asked. He couldn't say that sweet word to her in that loving tone if
he'd changed his mind. "Okay." A deep breath, and she
opened her eyes again. "There was another murder last
night." "Oh, Alexi." Instantly the
image of Crystal LaRue's mangled body flashed behind her eyes. "Oh,
God." She caught his hand in hers and squeezed. "Last
night?" "The desk clerk found her this
morning. They had an arrangement. She only used that room for work,
and he was ticked that she hadn't checked out and slipped him his
usual tip." He was taking it slow, deliberately, so that the
general horror would pass before he hit her with the specifics. Again
he tipped the brandy up to her lips. "She'd rented the room
three times last night. He caught a glimpse of the third John when
they went up, so we've had him looking over mug shots most of the
day." "You'll catch him." "Oh, yeah. There's no doubt about
it this time. He didn't find the guy in the books, but he gave the
police artist a fair description. We'll be broadcasting it. This time
we should have his blood type, too. DNA. Couple of other things." "You'll have him soon." "Not soon enough. Bess, the
woman…" His fingers tightened on hers, but he told her
the worst as gently as he knew how. "It was Rosalie." She only stared, and he watched,
helpless, as the color simply slid out of her face. "No."
She was tugging her hand from his, but he only held tighter. "You're
wrong. You made a mistake. I just saw her. I just talked to her a
couple of days ago." "There's no mistake." His
voice toughened, for her sake. "I ID'd her myself. Rechecked
that with prints, and the desk clerk's ID. Bess, it was Rosalie." The moan came out brokenly as she
wrapped her arms around herself and began to rock. "Don't,"
she said when he tried to gather her close. "Don't, don't,
don't." She sprang up, needing the distance,
desperate to find something to do with the helpless rage that was
building inside her. "She didn't have to die. It isn't right. It
isn't right for her to die like that." "It's never right." It was his tone, the cool detachment of
it, that had her whirling on him. "But she was just a hooker.
Don't get involved, right? Don't feel anything. Isn't that what you
told me?" He went very still, as if she'd pulled
a gun and taken aim. "I guess I did." "I wanted to help her, but you
told me I couldn't. You told me it was a waste of my time and energy.
And you were right, weren't you, Alexi? How fine it must be to always
be so right." He took the blow. What else could he
do? "Why don't you sit down, Bess? You'll make yourself sick." She wanted to break something, to smash
it—but nothing was precious enough. "I cared, damn you. I
cared about her. She wasn't just a story line to me. She was a
person. All she wanted was to go south, buy a trailer." When her
breath began to hitch, she covered her mouth with her hands. "She
shouldn't have died like that." "I wish I could change it."
The bitter sense of failure turned his voice to ice. "I wish to
God I could." Before he realized the glass was leaving his hand,
he was heaving the snifter against the wall. "How do you know
what I felt when I walked into that filthy room and found her like
that? How the hell do you know what it's like to face it and know you
couldn't stop it? She was a person to me, too." "I'm sorry." The tears that
spilled over now spilled for all of them. "Alexi, I'm sorry." "For what?" He tossed back.
"It was the truth." "Facts. Not truth." He'd
tried to soften the blow, to cushion her when his own emotions were
raw. He'd needed to comfort. His eyes had been dazed with fatigue and
pain and the kind of grief she might never understand, but he'd
needed to shield her.'And she hadn't allowed it. "Hold me,
please. I need you to hold me." For a moment she was afraid he wouldn't
move. Then he crossed to her. Though his arms were rigid with
tension, they came around her. "I didn't mean to hurt you,"
she murmured, but he only shook his head and stroked her hair.
Grieving, she turned her face into his throat. "I wanted to make
it a lie somehow. To make you wrong so it could all be wrong."
She squeezed her eyes closed and held tight. "She was somebody." He stared blankly over her shoulder as
he remembered one of the last things Rosalie had said to him. She
treats me like somebody. "I know." "You'll catch him," she said
fiercely. "We'll catch him. We'll put him
away. He won't hurt anybody else." Though her words still
scraped against him, he rocked her. He would tell her the rest and
hoped it helped. "She had a knife." "I saw it. She showed me." "She used it. I don't know how bad
she hurt him, but she put up a hell of a fight. It's recorded." "Recorded?" Eyes dull with
shock, she leaned back. "My God. The tape. I gave her my mini
recorder." "I figured as much. For whatever
consolation it is, the fact that you did give it to her, and she
decided to use it, is going to make a difference. A big one." "You heard them," she said
through dry lips. "You heard—" "We got everything, from the deal
on the street until… the end. Don't ask me, Bess." He
lifted a hand to cup her face. "Even if I could tell you what
was on the tape, I wouldn't." "I wasn't going to ask. I don't
think I could bear to know what happened in that room." Calmer now, he searched her face. "I've
only got a few hours. I have to go in first thing in the morning. Do
you want me to stay with you tonight, or would you rather I go?" She'd hurt him more than she'd
realized. Perhaps the only way she could heal the wound was to admit,
and to show him, that she needed comfort. Needed it from him. Drawing
him close, she laid her head on his shoulder. "I want you with me, Alexi.
Always. And tonight—I don't think I'd make it through tonight
without you." She began to cry then. Alex picked her
up and carried her to the couch, where they could lie down and grieve
together.
Chapter 12
Contents - Prev Judd flexed his hand on the steering
wheel as he turned on West Seventy-sixth. He wasn't nervous this
time. He was eager. The idea of bringing Wilson J. Tremayne III—a
U.S. senator's grandson—in for questioning in the murders of
four women had him chafing at the bit. They had him, Judd thought. He knew
they had the creep. The artist's sketch, the blood type, the
voiceprint. It had been quick work on that, he mused. Flavored with
luck. Bess's tape had been one of those twisted aspects of police
work that never failed to fascinate him. It was Trilwalter who'd identified
Tremayne from the sketch. Judd remembered that the boss had taken a
long, hard look at the artist's rendering and then ordered Alex to
the newspaper morgue. The desk clerk had picked the reprint of
Tremayne's newspaper picture from a choice of five. From there, Alex had used a connection
at one of the local television stations and had finessed a videotape
of Tremayne campaigning for his grandfather. The lab boys had jumped
right on it, and had matched the voice to the one on Bess's tape. It still made him queasy to think about
what had been on that tape, but that was something he didn't want to
show to Alex. Just as he knew better than to let Alex spot his
eagerness now. "So," he said casually, "you
think the Yankees have got a shot this year?" Alex didn't even glance over. He could
all but taste his partner's excitement. "When a cop starts
licking his lips, he forgets things. Miranda rights, probable cause,
makes all kinds of little procedural mistakes that help slime ooze
out of courtrooms and back onto the street." Judd clenched his jaw. "I'm not
licking my lips." "Malloy, you'll be drooling any
minute." Alex looked over at the beautiful old building while
Judd hunted up a parking space. The Gothic touches appealed to him,
as did the tall, narrow windows and the scattering of terrace
gardens. Tremayne lived on the top floor, in a plush two-level condo
with a view of the park and a uniformed doorman downstairs. He came and went as he pleased, wearing
his Italian suits and his Swiss watch. And four women were dead. "Don't take it personally,"
Alex said when they got out of the car. "Stanislaski's rule
number five." But Judd was getting good, very good,
at reading his partner. "You want him as bad as I do." Alex looked over, his eyes meeting,
then locking on Judd's. There wasn't eagerness in them or excitement
or even satisfaction. They were all cold fury. "So let's go get
the bastard." They flashed their badges for the
doorman, then rode partway up in the elevator with a plump
middle-aged woman and her yipping schnauzer. Alex glanced up and
spotted the security camera in the corner. It might come in handy, he
thought. The DA would have to subpoena the tapes for the nights of
the murders. If they were dated and timed, so much the better. But,
if not, they would still show Tremayne going and coming. The schnauzer got off at four. They
continued on to eight. Side by side, they approached 8B. Though the door was thick, Alex could
hear the strains of an aria from Aida coming from the apartment. He'd
never cared much for opera, but he'd liked this particular one. He
wondered if it would be spoiled for him now. He rang the buzzer. He had to ring it a second time before
Tremayne answered. Alex recognized him. It was almost as though they
were old friends now that Alex had pored over the newspaper shots and
stories, the videotape. And, of course, he knew his voice. Knew it
when it was calm, when it was amused and when it was darkly, sickly,
thrilled. Dressed in a thick velour robe that
matched his china-blue eyes, Tremayne stood dripping, rubbing a thick
monogrammed towel over his fair hair. "Wilson J. Tremayne?" "That's right." Tremayne
glanced pleasantly from face to face. He didn't have the street sense
to smell cop. "I'm afraid you've caught me at a bad time." "Yes, sir." Never taking his
eyes off Tremayne's, Alex took out his badge. "Detectives
Stanislaski and Malloy." "Detectives?" Tremayne's
voice was bland, only mildly curious, but Alex saw the flicker.
"Don't tell me my secretary forgot to pay my parking tickets
again." "You'll have to get dressed, Mr.
Tremayne." Still watching, Alex replaced his shield. "We'd
like you to come with us." "With you?" Tremayne eased
backward a step. Judd noted that his hand eased down toward the
doorknob, closed over it. Knuckles whitened. "I'm afraid that
would be very inconvenient. I have a dinner engagement." "You'll want to cancel that,"
Alex said. "This may take a while." "Detective—?" "Stanislaski." "Ah, Stanislaski. Do you know who
I am?" Because it suited him, because he
wanted it, Alex let Tremayne see the knowledge. "I know exactly
who you are, Jack." Alex allowed himself one quick flash of
pleasure at the fear that leaped into Tremayne's eyes. "We're
going downtown, Mr. Tremayne. Your presence is requested for
questioning on the murders of four women. Mary Rodell." His
voice grew quieter, more dangerous, on each name. "Angie
Horowitz, Crystal LaRue and Rosalie Hood. You're free to call your
attorney." "This is absurd." Alex slapped a hand on the door before
Tremayne could slam it shut. "We can take you in as you are—and
give your neighbors a thrill. Or you can get dressed." Alex saw the quick panic and was braced
even as Tremayne turned to run. He knew better—sure he did—but
it felt so damn good to body-slam the man up against that
silk-papered wall. A small, delicate statue tipped from its niche and
bounced on the carpet. When he hauled Tremayne up by the lapels, he
saw the gold chain, the dangling heart with a crack running through
it that was the twin of the one they had in evidence. And he saw the
fresh white bandage that neatly covered the wounds Rosalie had
inflicted as she fought for her life. "Give me a reason." Alex
leaned in close. "I'd love it." "I'll have your badges."
Tears began to leak out of Tremayne's eyes as he slid to the floor.
"My grandfather will have your badges." In disgust, Alex stood over him. "Go
find him some pants," he said to Judd. "I'll read him his
rights." With a nod, Judd started for the
bedroom. "Don't take it personally, Stanislaski." Alex glanced over with something that
was almost a smile. "Kiss off, Malloy." They had him cold, Alex thought as he
turned into Bess's building. They could call out every fancy lawyer
on the East Coast, and it wouldn't mean a damn thing. The physical
evidence was overwhelming—particularly since they'd found the
murder weapon in the nightstand drawer. Opportunity was unlikely to be a
problem, and as for motive—he'd leave that up to the shrinks.
Undoubtedly they'd cop an insanity plea. Maybe they'd even pull it
off. One way or the other, he was off the streets. It went a long way toward easing the
bitterness he'd felt over Rosalie's death. He hoped it helped Bess
with her grief. He'd nearly called her from the
station, but he'd wanted to tell her face-to-face. As he waited for
the elevator, he shifted the bunch of lilacs he held. Maybe it was a
weird time to bring her flowers, but he thought she needed them. Stepping into the car, he tucked a hand
in his pocket and felt the jeweler's box. It was even a weirder time
to propose marriage. But he knew he needed it. It scared him just how much he'd come
to depend on having her with him. To talk to him, to listen to him,
to make him laugh. To make love with him. He knew he was rushing
things, but he justified it by assuring himself that if he got her to
marry him quickly enough, she wouldn't have time to change her mind. She believed she was in love with him.
After they were committed, emotionally and legally, he would take as
much time as necessary to make certain it was true. The elevator opened, and Alex dug for
his keys. They'd order in tonight, he decided. Put on some music,
light some candles. He grimaced as he fit the key into the lock. No,
she'd probably had that routine before, and he'd be damned if he'd
follow someone else's pattern. He'd have to think of something else. He opened the door with his arms full
of nodding lilacs, his mind racing to think of some clever,
innovative way to ask Bess to be his wife. The color went out of his
face and turned his eyes to midnight. He felt something slam into his
chest. It was like being shot. She was standing in the center of the
room, her laughter just fading away. In another man's arms, her mouth
just retreating from another man's lips. "Charlie, I—" She heard
the sound of the door and turned. The bright, beaming smile on her
face froze, then faded away like the laughter. "Alexi." "I guess I should have knocked."
His voice was dead calm. Viciously calm. "No, of course not." There
were butterflies in her stomach, and their wings were razor-sharp.
"Charlie, this is Alexi. I've told you about him." "Sure. Think I met you at Bess's
last party." Lanky, long-haired and obviously oblivious to the
tension throbbing in the air, he gave Bess's shoulders a squeeze.
"She gives the best." Alex set the flowers aside. One fragile
bloom fell from the table and was ignored. "So I've heard." "Well, I've got to be going."
Charlie bent to give Bess another kiss. Alex's hands clenched. "You
won't let me down?" "Of course not." She worked
up a smile, grateful that Charlie was too preoccupied to sense the
falseness of it. "You know how happy I am for you, Charlie. I'll
be in touch." He went out cheerfully, calling out a
last farewell before he shut the door. In the silence, Alex noticed
the music for the first time. Violins and flutes whispered out of her
stereo. Very romantic, he thought, and his
teeth clenched like his fists. "Well." Her eyes were burning
dry, though her heart was weeping. "I can see I should explain."
She walked over to the wine she'd poured for Charlie and topped off
her glass. "I can also see that you've already made up your
mind, so explanations would be pointless." "You move fast, Bess." She was glad she had her back to him
for a moment. Very glad, because her, hand trembled as she lifted the
wine. "Do you think so, Alexi?" "Or maybe you've been seeing him
all along." "You can say that?" Now she
turned, and the first flashes of anger burst through her. "You
can stand there and say that to me?" "What the hell do you expect me to
say?" he shot back. He didn't go near her. Didn't dare. "I
walk in here and find you with him. A little music, a nice bottle of
wine." He wished he had been shot. It couldn't possibly hurt
more than this bite of betrayal. "Do you think I'm an idiot?" "No. No, I don't." She needed
to sit, but she locked her knees straight. "But I must be to
have been so careless as to have an assignation here when you were
bound to find me out." Her eyes were like glass as she toasted
him. "Caught me." He took a step forward, stopped
himself. "Are you going to tell me you didn't sleep with him?" In the thrum of silence, the flutes
sang. "No, I'm not going to tell you that. I'm not ashamed that
I once cared enough for a very good man to be intimate with him. I'd
tell you that I haven't been with Charlie or anyone else since I met
you, but the evidence is against me, isn't it, Detective?" She was so tired, Bess thought, so
terribly tired, and the scent of the lilacs made her want to weep.
Rosalie's funeral had been that morning, and she'd quietly made the
arrangements herself. She'd gone alone, without mentioning it to
Alex. But she'd needed him. "You let him kiss you." "Yes, I let him kiss me. I've let
lots of men kiss me. Isn't that the problem?" She set down the
wine before she could do something rash, like tossing it to the
floor. "You didn't come to me a virgin, Alexi, nor did I expect
you to. That's one of the big differences between us." "There's a bigger difference
between a virgin and a—" He broke off, appalled with himself."
He wouldn't have meant it. Stumbling, horrified apologies whirled
through his head. But he could see by the way her head jerked up, the
way her color drained, that there would be no taking back even the
unsaid. "I think," she said in an odd
voice, "you'd better go." "We haven't finished." "I don't want you here. Even a
whore can choose." His face was as pale as hers. "Bess,
I didn't mean that. I could never mean that. I want to understand—" "No, you don't." She cut him
off, her voice so thick with tears that she had to fight for every
word. "You never wanted to understand, Alexi. You never wanted
to hear the one thing I needed you to believe. Now the only thing you
need to understand is that I don't want to see you again." He felt something rip apart in his gut.
"You can't have that." "If you don't leave now, I'll call
Security. I'll call your captain, I'll call the mayor."
Desperation was rising like a flood. "Whatever it takes to keep
you away from me." His eyes narrowed, sharpened. "You
can call God Almighty. It won't stop me." "Maybe this will." She
gripped her hands tightly together and looked just over his shoulder.
"I don't love you, I don't want you, I don't need you. It was
fun while it lasted, but the game's over. You can let yourself out." She turned away and walked quickly up
the stairs. There had been hurt in his eyes. If there had been anger,
she knew, he would have come after her, but there had been hurt, and
she made it to the bedroom alone. With her hands over her face, she
waited, biting back sobs, until she heard the door close downstairs.
With a sound of mourning, she lowered herself to the floor and tasted
her own tears. They were bitter. Impatient and unsympathetic, Mikhail
paced the floor of Alex's sparsely furnished apartment. "You
don't answer your phone," he was saying. "You don't return
messages." He kicked a discarded shirt aside. The apartment was
a shambles. "Lucky for you I came instead of Mama. She'd box
your ears for living like a pig." "I gave the staff the month off."
With the concentrated care of the nearly drunk, Alex poured another
glass of vodka from the half-empty bottle on the table. "And drinking alone in the middle
of the day." "So, join me." Alex gestured
carelessly toward the kitchen, where dishes were piled high. "Bound
to be a clean glass somewhere." Mikhail washed one out before coming
back to the table. He sat, poured. "What is this, Alexi?" "Celebration. My day off."
Alex took a swallow and waited for the vodka to join the rest
swimming through his system. "I caught the bad guy." With a
half laugh, he toasted himself. "And lost the girl." Mikhail drummed his fingers on the
table as he drank. It was no less than he'd expected. "You
fought with Bess?" "Fought?" Lips pursed, Alex
studied the clear, potent liquid in his glass. "I don't know
that's the term, exactly. Found her with another man." Mikhail's glass froze halfway to his
lips. "You're wrong." "Nope." Alex reached for the
bottle with an almost steady hand. "Walked in and found her
lip-locked to this guy she used to be engaged to. Bess has this hobby
of getting engaged." Mikhail merely shook his head.
Something was not quite right with this picture. "Did you kill
him?" "Thought about it." Before he
drank again, Alex ran his tongue over his teeth. Good, he thought.
They were nearly numb. The rest would follow. "Too damn bad I'm
a cop." "What was her explanation?" "Didn't give me one. Got pissed,
is all." He set the glass down so that he could use both hands
to rub his face. "Because you accused without
trusting." "I didn't accuse," Alex shot
back, then pressed his fingers to his burning eyes. "I didn't
have to. What I didn't say was unforgivable. She tossed me out on my
ear, but not before she told me she didn't love me anyway." "She lies." Before Alex could
lift his glass again, Mikhail grabbed his wrist. "I tell you,
she lies. A few days ago she visited Rachel and the baby. I made her
sit for me and sketched her while she talked of you. There's no
mistaking what I saw in her eyes, Alexi. You're blind if you haven't
seen it yourself." He had seen it, and the pain of
remembering what he'd seen clawed through him so that he stumbled to
his feet as if to escape it. "She falls in love easily." "So? There is love, and love. How
many times have you taken the fall?" "This is the first." "For this kind, yes. There were
others." "They were different." "Ah." Patient and amused,
Mikhail held up a finger. "So it's okay for you to play with
love until you find the truth, but it's not okay for Bess." "It's—" Put that way,
it was tough to argue with. Especially when his head was reeling.
"Damn it, I was jealous. I have a right to be jealous." "You have a right to make an ass
of yourself, too." Pleased, now that he knew it could be
fixed, Mikhail lucked back and crossed his booted feet. "Did
you?" "Big-time." Alex swayed, then
sat down heavily. "I was going to ask her to many me, Mik. I had
the ring in my pocket and these stupid lilacs. I was scared to death
she'd say yes. More scared that she'd say no." He propped his
spinning head in his hands. "What the hell was she doing kissing
that son of a bitch?" "Maybe if you had asked nicely,
she would have told you." With a lopsided grin, Alex turned his
bleary eyes on his brother. "Would you have asked nicely?" "No, I would have broken his arms,
maybe his legs, too. Then I would have asked." With a sigh,
Mikhail patted Alex's shoulder. "But that is me. You were always
more impulsive." "We could go find him." Alex
considered and, warming to the idea, leaned over to give Mikhail a
sloppy hug. "We'll go beat him up together. Like old times." "We'll try something different."
Rising, Mikhail hauled Alex to his feet. "Where we going?" "I'm going to put you in a cold
shower until your head's clear." Alex staggered and linked an arm around
his brother's neck. "What for?" "So you can go find your woman and
grovel." Unsure of his footing, Alex stared at
the tilting floor. "I don't wanna grovel." "Yes, you do. It's best to get
used to it before you marry her. I have more experience in this." "Oh, yeah?" Enjoying the idea
of his big brother crawling at Sydney's feet, he grinned as Mikhail
thrust him, fully clothed, into the shower. "Can I watch next
time?" "No." With immense
satisfaction, Mikhail turned the cold water on full and listened to
his brother's pained shout bounce viciously on the tiles. "This
is a very good start," he decided. "You son of a bitch." They
were both laughing when Alex grabbed Mikhail in a headlock and
dragged him under the spray. He was nearly sober by the time he
walked into Bess's office, but he wasn't laughing. It was hard to
laugh when your throat was thick with nerves. He was going to be reasonable, he
promised himself. They would discuss the entire matter like civilized
adults. And if she didn't give him the right answers, he'd strangle
her. He could always arrest himself afterward. But he only saw Lori sitting at the
keyboard, frantically typing. "I'll have the damn changes by
six," she called out. Her brow was furrowed in concentration as
she glanced up. Her eyes frosted over. "What the hell do you want?" "I need to see Bess." "You're out of luck." Nobody
hurt her friend and got away with it. Nobody. "She's not here." "Where?" She offered an anatomically impossible
suggestion, offered it so coolly he nearly smiled. But it wasn't
enough. She leapt up and slammed the door shut. Locked it. "Sit
down, buster, I've got an earful for you." "Tell me where she is." "When hell freezes over. Do you
know what you did to her?" She took the flat of her hand to push
him back. "Why didn't you just cut her heart and slice it into
little pieces while you were at it?" "What I did?" He jammed his
hands into his pockets so he wouldn't shove her back. "I'm the
one who walked in and found her snuggled up to that pretty-faced
playwright." "You don't know what you found." "Then why don't you tell me?" She'd die first. "You don't know
her at all, do you? You didn't have a clue how lucky you were. She's
the most loving, most generous, most unselfish person I've ever
known, She'd have crawled through broken glass for you." Afraid
she'd do something violent if she didn't move, Lori began to pace. "I
was so happy when she told me about you. I could see how much in love
she was. Really in love. She wasn't just taking you under her wing
until she could find someone for you." "Find someone for me?" "What do you think she did with
all those other men who were dazzled by her?" Lori tossed back.
"Oh, she'd try to talk herself into being in love, and thinking
they loved her, back, and the whole time she'd listen to their
problems like some den mother. Then she'd steer them in the direction
of some woman she'd decided was perfect for them. She was usually
right." "She was going to marry—" "She was never going to marry
anyone. Whenever she said yes, it was because she couldn't bear to
hurt anyone's feelings. And, okay, because she always wanted to have
someone she could count on. But however loyal, however sensitive, she
is to other people's feelings, she's not stupid. She'd tell herself
she was going to get married, then she'd go into overdrive finding
the guy a substitute." "Substitute? Why—?" But
Lori wasn't ready to let him get a word in. "Not that she ever calculated it
that way. But after you watched it happen a couple of times, you saw
the pattern. But you…" She whirled back to him. "You
broke the pat tern. She needed you. You made her cry." Angry
tears glazed Lori's own eyes. "Not once did I ever see her cry
over any man. She'd just slip seamlessly into the my-pal-Bess
category, and everyone was happy. But she's cried buckets over you." He felt sick, and small, and he was
beginning to understand a great deal about groveling. "Tell me
where she is. Please." "Why the hell should I?" "I love her." She wanted to snarl at him for daring
to say so, but she recognized the same misery in his eyes she'd seen
in her friend's. "Charlie was—" "No." He shook his head
quickly. "It doesn't matter." What did matter was trust,
and it was time he gave it. "I don't need to know. I just need
her." With a sigh, Lori fingered the
square-cut diamond on her left hand. Bess had pushed her into taking
the right step with Steven. She could only hope she was doing the
same in return. "If you hurt her again, Alex—" "I won't." Then he sighed. "I
don't want to hurt her again, but I probably will." She weakened, because it was exactly
the thing a man in love would say. "I sent her home. She wasn't
in any shape to work." "Dyakuyu." "What?" "Thanks." She hated feeling this way. The only
way Bess could get from one day to the next was by telling herself it
would get better. It had to get better. But she didn't believe it. She hadn't had the heart to throw out
the lilacs. She'd tried to. She'd even stood holding them over the
trash can, weeping like a fool. But the thought of parting with them
had been too much. Now she tormented herself with the fragile scent
whenever she came downstairs. She thought about taking a
trip—anywhere. She certainly had the vacation time coming, but
it didn't seem fair to leave Lori in the lurch, especially since Lori
had added wedding plans to her work load. A lot of good she was doing Lori, or
the show, this way, she thought. But the problem of the people in
Millbrook seemed terribly petty when compared to hers. Too bad she
couldn't write herself out of this one, she thought, as she stood in
the kitchen, trying to talk herself into fixing something to eat. Well, she'd certainly made the grade,
Bess told herself, and pressed her fingers against her swollen eyes.
She'd fallen in love and had her heart broken. Great research for the
next troubled relationship she invented for the television audience. The hell with food. She was going to go
up to bed and will herself to sleep. Tomorrow she would find some way
to put her life back together. When she stepped out of the kitchen,
what was left of her life shattered at her feet. He was standing by the table, one hand
brushing over the lilacs. All he did was look at her, turn his head
and look, and she nearly crumpled to her knees. "What are you doing here?"
The pain made her voice razor-sharp. "I still have my key." He
lowered his hand slowly. Her eyes were still puffy from her last bout
of tears, and there were smudges of fatigue under them. Nothing that
had been said to him, nothing he'd said to himself, had lashed more
sharply. "You didn't have to bring it by."
If composure was all she had left, she would cling to it. "You
could have dropped it in the mail. But thanks." Her smile was so
cold it hurt her jaw. "If that's all, I'm in a hurry. I was just
on my way up to change before I go out." "You can't look at me when you
lie." He said it half to himself, remembering how her eyes had
drifted away from his face when she said she didn't love him. She forced her gaze back to his, held
it steady. "What do you want, Alexi?" "A great many things. Maybe too
many things. But first, for you to forgive me." Her face crumpled at that. She put a
hand up to cover it, knowing it was too late. "Leave me alone." "Milaya, let me—" "Don't." She cringed away,
crossing her arms over herself in self-defense, and his hands stopped
an inch away. There was an odd catch in his breath as he drew them
back and let them fall to his sides. "I won't touch you." His
voice was quiet and strained. "Please, let me say what I've come
to say." "What else could there be?"
She turned away. "I know what you think of me. You made that
clear." "What I did was hurt you and make
a fool of myself." "Oh, yes, you hurt me." She
was still trembling from it. "But not just that last time. You
hurt me every time you pulled back when I needed to tell you how much
I loved you. I thought, I won't let it matter, because he'll have to
see it. God, he'll have to see it, because it's right there every
time I look at him. Every time I think about him. And he loves me. He
wants me. In my whole life, no one wanted me. Not really." "Bess." She jerked away from his hands. "My
parents," she began, turning back. "How many times I heard
them say to each other, 'Where did she come from?' As if I was some
stray pet that had wandered in by mistake." When she began to roam the room, her
shoulders still hunched protectively, he said nothing. How could he
tell her he was sorry he'd opened up old wounds, and sorry, as well,
that it had taken that to have her reveal those smothered feelings to
him? "I handled it." Those stiff
shoulders jerked as she tried to shrug it off. "What else could
I do? It wasn't their fault, really. They've always been so perfect,
in their way, and I could never be. Not for them. Not even for you." "Do you think that's what I want?" She glanced back then. The tears had
dried up. There was no point in them. "I don't know what you
want, Alexi. I only know it keeps circling around. I went from my
parents into school. Those awful teenage years, when all the girls
were so bright and pretty, and falling in and out of love. No one
wanted me. Oh, I had friends. Somewhere along the line I'd learned
that if you didn't try so hard, if you just relaxed and acted
naturally, that there were a lot of people who'd like you for what
you were. But there was never anyone to love. There has never been
anybody to love until you." "There's never going to be anyone
else." He waited until she turned back. "I love you, Bess.
Please, give me another chance." "It won't work." She rubbed
at her drying tears with the heel of her hand. "I thought it
would, I wanted it to. I was so sure love would be enough. But it's
not. Not without hope. Certainly not without faith." The calm way she said it had panic
streaking through him. "Do you want me to crawl?" He
ignored her defensive retreat and gripped her arms. "Then I
will. You're not going to push me out of your life because I was
stupid, because I was afraid. I won't let you." Was this how a man crawled? she
wondered. With his eyes flashing fire and his voice booming? "And
the next time you see me kissing an old friend?" "I won't care." With a sound
of disgust, he released her to stalk the room. "I will care.
I'll kill the next one who touches you." "Then New York would be littered
with bodies." It should be funny, she thought. Why wasn't it
funny? "I can't change what I am for you, Alexi. I wouldn't ask
you to change for me." "No, you wouldn't." He
scrubbed his hands over his face and struggled to find some balance.
"I know a kiss between friends is harmless, Bess. I'm not quite
that big a fool. But the other night, when I walked in—" "You assumed I was betraying you." "I don't know what I assumed."
It was as honest as he could get. "When I saw you, I felt…
It was all feeling," he said carefully. "So I didn't think.
In my heart, in my head, I know better than to assume anything. One
of my own rules that I broke. There were reasons." Calmer now,
he walked back and took her hands. "We'd just finished the bust,
and I was wired from it. I knew I'd tell you about it, all about it.
I'd gone beyond trying to separate that part of my life—any
part of it—from you. It was going to upset you to think about
it, because of Rosalie. I knew that, too. Damn it, I knew you'd gone
to that funeral alone, and I felt like the lowest kind of creep for
letting you." He was prying her heart open again,
inch by inch. "I didn't think you knew." "I knew." His voice was flat.
All he could think was how desperately he wanted to hold her. "You
leave notes everywhere. All these pieces of paper scattered around,
with scribbling on them about dry-cleaning and dialogue and
appointments. I saw the one about the flowers you'd ordered for her,
and the directions to the cemetery." He looked down at their
hands. "If things hadn't been moving so fast in the
investigation, I would have taken the time. I would have tried to." That she didn't doubt. "It was
more important to me that you catch the man who killed her than that
you go stand over her grave." "I wasn't with you," he said,
more slowly. "And I wanted to be. And when I got here, I wanted
to…" This was hardly the time to bring up the ring in his
pocket. "I was churned up about a lot of things, Bess. My
response was way out of line, and I'll apologize for it as often as
you like. But I'd like you to hear me out." "It's all right." She gave
his hands a squeeze, hoping he'd release hers. He didn't. "Alexi,
Charlie was here because—" "I don't need to know." Now
he let her hands go to bring his own to her face. He wanted her to
see what was in his eyes. "You don't have to explain yourself to
me. You don't have to change yourself for me." She felt something move inside her
heart and was afraid to believe it was healing. "I'd rather
clear the air. I was too angry to do it before. He came by to tell me
that Gabrielle was expecting. He was like a little boy at Christmas,
and he wanted to share his good news with a friend. And to ask me if
I'd be godmother—even though it's seven and a half months down
the road." He lowered his brow to hers. "You
should have slugged me, McNee." When he moved his mouth toward
hers, he felt her retreat. Patiently he stroked his thumbs over her
temples. "Just once," he murmured and tasted her lips. He didn't mean to deepen the kiss,
didn't mean to crush her against him and hold her so tightly neither
of them could breathe. But he couldn't stop himself until he felt her
body shake with a fresh bout of tears. "Don't. Please don't." He
pressed his face into her hair and rocked her. "I'll break
apart." Turning her face into his shoulder, she
fought back the worst of the tears. "I didn't want you to come
back. I didn't want to feel this again." He deserved that, he thought as he
squeezed his eyes tight. "You were right to send me away. I want
a chance to prove to you that you're right to let me back in."
He brushed a hand through her hair. "You're so good at
listening, Bess. I have to ask you to listen to me now." "You don't need to apologize
again." She could do nothing but love him, she realized, and,
drawing back, she managed a smile. "And I can't let you back in,
because you were always here." Her words brought a pressure to his
chest. He pressed their joined hands against it to try to ease it
away. "Just that easy?" "It's not easy." She supposed
it would never be easy. "It's just the way it is." "Mikhail said I would grovel,"
he murmured. "Bess, you humble me." "Let's put it behind us." She
drew a deep breath, then kissed both his cheeks as a sign of peace.
"I'm good at fresh starts." "No." Taking her hand, he
pulled her to the couch. "I like our other start. We don't need
a new one, only to play this one out. Sit." He pulled her down
with him, keeping her hand close to his heart. "You explained,
now I will. I was afraid to believe in you. No woman has ever meant
what you mean, and I let myself imagine that you'd be with me
forever. Just as I let myself imagine that you'd turn away. And
because I was more afraid of the second, it seemed more real." "It's hard to be afraid." She
turned her cheek to her hand. "I know." "You don't know all." He
glanced away, toward the flowers subtly scenting the room. "You
kept the lilacs." "I tried not to." She smiled
again. "But they were so beautiful." "I brought you something besides
lilacs that day." He reached into his pocket and drew out the
box. Her hand went limp in his. He watched her lips tremble apart. "I
don't think it's ostentatious." When she only continued to
stare, he shifted. "That was a joke." "Okay." The two syllables
came out in a whisper. "Are you—are you going to let me
see it?" For an answer, he opened the box
himself. Inside was a gold band set with a rainbow of gems. He knew
what they were only because he'd asked the jeweler to identify each
of them. The amethyst, the peridot, the blue topaz, the citrine. "I know it's not traditional,"
he said when she remained silent. "But it reminded me of you,
and I wanted—hell, I wanted something no one else would have
thought to give you." "No one has," she managed,
barely breathing. "No one would." "If you don't like it, we can look
for something else." She was afraid she would cry again and
knew it would do neither of them any good. "It's lovely.
Beautiful." She managed to tear her gaze from it. "You
bought me this before? You had it with you the other night? You were
going to give it to me, then you walked in and saw me with Charlie."
Laughing, she lifted a hand to her cheek. "I'm surprised you
didn't gun us both down. I couldn't have written it better myself." "Then you forgive me?" She already had, but since he was
looking so nervous, she nodded. "Anyone with such good taste
deserves a second chance." "I bought this days ago, but it
took me a while to work up the nerve. Facing a junkie with an Uzi
seemed easier." But he was into it now, and he was going to
finish. "My idea was to pressure you to accept it, then push for
a quick wedding so you wouldn't change your mind. But that was
wrong." He closed the box, and was encouraged by Bess's quick
gasp of dismay. "It was stupid, and it showed a lack of faith in
both of us. I'm sorry." "I—You—" She let
out a frustrated breath. "I don't mind." "Of course you do," he said.
"It was calculating, even devious, when a proposal of marriage
should be romantic. So, when we're both ready, I'll ask you
properly." Her face fell. "When we're both
ready?" "I don't want to push you when you
might be feeling a little vulnerable. Especially since a long
engagement is out. So I'll give you time." "Time," she echoed, ready to
scream. "It's fair." He waited a
beat. "Okay, I'm ready." Before she could laugh, he was down on
one knee. "What are you doing?" "A proper proposal of marriage."
He nearly launched into his humble little speech. Instead, his eyes
darkened when she continued to laugh. "You don't want one." "Damn right I want one. But I want
you up here." She took his hand to tug him back to the couch so
that they were at eye level with each other. "I want you to look
me right in the eye." "Okay, then I get something I
want, too." "Name it." "I want to hear you say it."
He caught her hand, brought it to his cheek. "I want very much
to hear you say it. I need to hear the words from you." "I love you, Alexi." For the
first time, she said the words smiling, knowing they would be taken
as they were meant. "I'm going to love you forever." He turned his face so that his lips
pressed into her palm. Taking the ring out of the box, he slipped it
onto her finger. It shot out a rainbow of color. As he linked his
fingers with hers, he lifted his head. "Be my family." He
shook his head before she could speak and felt himself stumble. "I
meant to be romantic. Let me—" "No." Overwhelmed, she laid a
hand over his lips. "That was perfect. Don't change it. Don't
change anything." "Then say yes." "Yes." She threw her arms
around him and laughed. "Oh, yes…" If you enjoyed reading about the
Stanislaski brothers, look for THE STANISLASKI SISTERS: NATASHA AND
RACHEL complete novels available in one
fabulous volume, from Silhouette Books and CONSIDERING KATE, a brand-new book in the Stanislaski
saga, available from Special Edition. Only from #1 New York Times bestselling
author NORA ROBERTS Both books on sale in February 2001, at
your favorite retail outlets. Here's a sneak preview of TAMING NATASHA, the first story in The
Stanislaski Sisters: Natasha and Rachel. It was only dinner, Natasha told
herself as she walked to the door. And he was only a man, she added,
pulling the door open. An outrageously attractive man. He looked wonderful, was all she could
think, with his hair swept back from his face, and that half smile in
his eyes. "Hi." He held out another red
rose. Natasha nearly sighed. Giving in a
little, she tapped the blossom against her cheek. "It wasn't the
roses that changed my mind," she said. "About what?" "About having dinner with you." He smiled then, fully, and exasperated
her by looking charming and cocky all at the same time. "What
did?" "I'm hungry." She set her
short velvet jacket on the arm of the sofa. "I'll put this in
water…" The restaurant he'd chosen was only a
short drive away. Over her first glass of wine, she told herself to
relax and enjoy. Over dinner, she was careful to steer the
conversation toward subjects they had touched on in his class. But
Spence was equally determined to explore more personal areas. "Tell me about your family." Natasha slipped a hot, butter-drenched
morsel of lobster into her mouth. "I'm the oldest of four,"
she began, then became abruptly aware that his fingertips were
playing casually with hers on the tablecloth. She slid her hand out
of reach. Her maneuver had him lifting his glass
to hide a smile. "Are you all spies?" A flicker of temper joined the lights
that the candle brought to her eyes. "Certainly not." "I wondered, since you seem so
reluctant to talk about them." His face sober, he leaned toward
her. "Say 'Get moose and squirrel.'" Her mouth quivered before she gave up
and laughed. "I have two brothers and a sister. My parents still
live in Brooklyn." "You said you were about five when
you came to the States. Do you remember much about your-life before
that?" "Of course." He ran a fingertip down her wrist and
surprised a shiver out of her. Before she moved her hand away, he
felt her pulse scramble. "What do you remember?" Because her reaction annoyed her, she
was determined to show him nothing. She only shrugged. "My
father bringing in wood for the fire, his hair and coat all covered
with snow. The baby crying—my youngest brother. The smell of
the bread my mother baked. Pretending to be asleep when I listened to
Papa talk to her about escape." "Were you afraid?" "Yes." Her eyes blurred with
the memory. She didn't often look back, didn't often need to. But
when she did, it came not with the watery look of dreams, but clear
as glass. "Oh, yes. Very afraid. More than I will ever be
again." "Will you tell me?" She started to pass it off, but the
memory remained too vivid. "We waited until spring and took only
what we could carry. We told no one, no one at all, and set off in
the wagon. Papa said we were going to visit my mother's sister who
lived in the west. But I think there were some who knew, who watched
us go with tired faces and big eyes. Papa had papers, badly forged,
but he had a map and hoped we would avoid border guards." "And you were only five?" "Nearly six by then."
Thinking, she ran a fingertip around and around the rim of her glass.
"Mikhail was between four and five, Alex just two. At night, if
we could risk a fire, we would sit around it and Papa would tell
stories. Those were the good nights. We would fall asleep listening
to his voice and smelling the smoke from the fire. We went over the
mountains and into Hungary. It took us ninety-three days." He couldn't imagine it, not even when
he could see it reflected so clearly in her eyes. Thinking of the
little girl, he took her hand and waited for her to go on. "My father planned for years.
Perhaps he had dreamed of it all his life. He had names, people who
would help defectors. There was war, the cold one, but I was too
young to understand. I understood the fear in my parents, in the
others who helped us. We were smuggled out of Hungary into Austria.
The church sponsored us, brought us to America. It was a long time
before I stopped waiting for the police to come and take my father
away." "That's a lot for a child to deal
with." "I also remember eating my first
hot dog." She smiled and picked up her wine. She never spoke of
that time, never. Not even with family. Now that she had, with him,
she felt a desperate heed to change the subject. "No childhood
is ever completely secure. But we grow up. I'm a businesswoman, and
you're a respected composer. Why don't you write?" She felt his
fingers tense on hers. "I'm sorry," she said quickly. "I
had no business asking that." "It's all right." His fingers
relaxed again. "I don't write because I can't." "I know your music. Something,
that intense doesn't fade." "It hasn't mattered a great deal
in the past couple of years. Just lately it's begun to matter again." "Don't be patient." When he smiled, she shook her head.
"No, I mean it. People always say when the time is right, when
the mood is right, when the place is right. Years are wasted that
way. If my father had waited until we were older, until the trip was
safer, we might still be in the Ukraine. There are some things that
should be grabbed with both hands and taken. Life can be very, very
short." He could feel the urgency in the way
her hands gripped his. And he could see the shadow of regret in her
eyes. The reason for both intrigued him as much as her words. "You may be right," he said
slowly, then brought the palm of her hand to his lips. "Waiting
isn't always the best answer." "It's getting late." Natasha
pulled her hand free, then balled it into a fist on her lap. But that
didn't stop the heat from spearing her arm… The curvy blonde in hot-pink spandex
tottered on stiletto heels as she worked her corner. Her eyes,
heavily painted with a sunburst of colors, kept a sharp watch on her
associates, those spangled shadows of the night. There was a great
deal of laughter on the street. After all, it was springtime in New
York. But beneath the laughter there was a flat sheen of boredom that
no amount of glitter or sex could disguise. For these ladies, business was
business. After popping in some fresh gum, she
adjusted the large canvas bag on her bare shoulder. Thank God it was
warm, she thought. It would be hell to strut around half-dressed if
the weather was ugly. A gorgeous black woman in red leather
that barely covered the essentials languidly lit a cigarette and
cocked her hip. "Come on, baby," she said to no one in
particular, in a voice husky from the smoke she exhaled. "Wanna
have some fun?" Some did, Bess noted, her eyes skimming
the block. Some didn't. All in all, she thought,
business was pretty brisk on this spring night. She'd observed
several transactions, and the varied ways they were contracted. It
was too bad boredom was the byword here. Boredom, and a defiant kind
of hopelessness. "You talking to yourself, honey?" "Huh?" Bess blinked up into
the shrewd eyes of the black goddess in red leather who had strolled
over. "Was I?" "You're new?" Studying Bess,
she blew out smoke. "Who's your man?" "My… I don't have one." "Don't have one?" The woman
arched her ruthlessly plucked brows and sneered. "Girl, you
can't work this street without a man." "That's what I'm doing."
Since she didn't have a cigarette, Bess blew a bubble with her gum.
Then snapped it. "Bobby or Big Ed find out, they're
going to mess you up." She shrugged. After all, it wasn't her
problem. "Free country." "Girl, ain't nothing free."
With a laugh, she ran a hand down her slick, leather-covered hip.
"Nothing at all." She flicked her cigarette into the
street, where it bounced off the rear fender of a cab. There were dozens of questions on
Bess's lips. It was in her nature to ask them, but she remembered
that she had to go slow. "So who's your man?" "Bobby." With her lips
pursed, the woman skimmed her gaze up and down Bess. "He'd take
you on. A little skinny through the butt, but you'd do. You need
protection when you work the streets." And she could use the
extra money Bobby would pass her way if she brought him a new girl. "Nobody protected the two girls
who got murdered last month." The black woman's eyes flickered. Bess
considered her self an excellent judge of emotion, and she saw grief,
regret and sorrow before the eyes hardened again. "You a cop?" Bess's mouth fell open before she
laughed. That was a good one, she thought. Sort of flattering. "No,
I'm not a cop. I'm just trying to make a living. Did you know either
of them? The women who were killed?" "We don't like questions around
here." The woman tilted her head. "If you're trying to make
a living, let's see you do it." Bess felt a quick ripple of unease. Not
only was the woman gorgeous, she was big. Big and suspicious. Both
qualities were going to make it difficult for Bess to hang back on
the fringes and observe. But she considered herself an agile thinker
and a quick study. After all, she reminded herself, she'd come here
tonight to do business. "Sure." Turning, she strutted
slowly along the sidewalk. Her hips—and she didn't for a minute
believe that her butt was skinny—swayed seductively. Maybe her throat was a little dry.
Maybe her heart was pounding a bit too quickly. But Bess McNee took a
great deal of pride in her work. She spotted the two men half a block
away and licked her lips. The one on the left, the dark one, looked
very promising. "Look, rookie, the idea's to take
one, maybe two." Alex scanned the sidewalk ahead. Hookers,
drunks, junkies and those unfortunate enough to have to pass through
them to get home. "My snitch says that the tall black
one—Rosalie—knew both the victims." "So why don't we just pick her up
and take her in for questioning?" Judd Malloy was anxious for
action. His detective's shield was only forty-eight hours old. And he
was working with Alexi Stanislaski, a cop who had a reputation for
moving quickly and getting the job done. "Better yet, why don't
we go roust her pimp?" Rookies, Alex thought. Why were they
always teaming him up with rookies? "Because we want her
cooperation. We're going to pick her up, book her for solicitation.
Then we're going to talk to her, real nice, before Bobby can come
along and tell her to clam up." "If my wife finds out I spent the
night picking up hookers—" "A smart cop doesn't tell his
family anything they'd don't need to know. And they don't need to
know much." Alex's dark brown eyes were cool, very cool, as they
flicked over his new partner's face. "Stanislaski's rule number
one." He spotted the blonde. She was staring
at him. Alex stared back. Odd face, he thought. Sharp, sexy, despite
the makeup she'd troweled on. Beneath all the gunk, her eyes were a
vivid green. The face itself was all angles, some of them wrong. Her
nose was slightly crooked, as if it had been broken. Some John or
pimp, he figured, then skimmed his eyes down to her mouth. Full, overfull, and a glossy red. It
didn't please him at all that he felt a reaction to it. Not knowing
what she was, what she did. Her chin came to a slight point, and with
her prominent cheekbones it gave her face a triangular, foxlike look. The clinging tube top and spandex capri
pants showed every inch of her curvy, athletic little body. He'd
always been a sucker for the athletic type—but he reminded
himself just where this particular number got her exercise. In any case, she wasn't the one he was
looking for. Now or never, Bess told herself,
feeling her new acquaintance's eyes on her. "Hey, baby…" Though
she hadn't smoked since she'd been fifteen, her voice was husky.
Saying a prayer to whatever gods were listening, she veered in on
Alex. "Want to party?" "Maybe." He hooked a finger
in the top of her tube, and was surprised when she flinched. "You're
not quite what I had it mind, sweetie." "Oh?" What next? Combining
instinct with her observations, she tossed her head and leaned into
him. She had the quick impression of pressing against steel—hard,
unyielding and very cool. "Just what did you have in mind?" Then, for a moment, she had nothing at
all on hers. Not with the way those dark eyes cut into her, through
her. His knuckles were brushing her skin, just above the breasts. She
felt the heat from them, from him. As she continued to stare, she was
struck by a vivid image of the two of them, rolling on a narrow bed
in some dark room. And it had nothing to do with business. It was the first time Alex had ever
seen a hooker blush. It threw him off, made him want to apologize for
the fantasy that had just whipped through his brain. Then he
remembered himself. "Just a different type, babe." In her heels, they were eye-to-eye. It
made him want to rub off the powders and paints to see what was
beneath. "I can be a different type,"
Bess said, delighted with her inspired response. "Hey, girlfriend." Rosalie
strutted over and slipped a friendly arm around Bess's shoulders.
"You're not going to be greedy and take both of these boys, are
you?" "I—" Pay dirt, Alex thought, and shifted his
attention to Rosalie. "You two a team?" "We are tonight." She glanced
from Alex to his partner. "How 'bout you two?" Judd searched for his voice. He'd
rather have been facing a gunman in an alley. And he simply couldn't
put his hands on this big, beautiful woman, when a picture of his
wife's trusting face was flashing in his head like a neon light. "Sure." He let out a long
breath and tried to emulate some of Alex's cocky confidence. Rosalie threw back her head and laughed
before she stepped forward, bumping bodies with Judd. He gave way
instinctively as a dark red flush crept up his neck. "I believe
you're new at this, honey. Why don't you let Rosalie show you the
ropes?" Because his partner seemed to have
developed laryngitis, Alex took over. "How much?" "Well…" Rosalie didn't
bother to look over at Bess, who had gone dead pale. "Special
rate tonight. You get both of us for a hundred. That's the first
hour." She leaned down and whispered something in Judd's ear
that had him babbling. "After that," she continued, "we
can negotiate." "I don't—" Bess began,
then felt Rosalie's fingers dig into her bare shoulder like sharp
little knives. "I think that'll do it," Alex
said, and pulled out his badge. "Ladies, you're busted." Cops, Bess realized on a wave of sweet
relief. While Rosalie expressed her opinion with a single vicious
word, Bess struggled not to burst into wild laughter. Perfect, Bess thought as she was bumped
along into the squad room. She'd been arrested for solicitation, and
life couldn't be better. Trying to take everything in at once, she
grinned as she scanned the station house. She'd been in one before,
of course. As she always said, she took her work seriously. But not
in this precinct. Not downtown. It was dirty—grimy, really, she
decided, making mental notes and muttering to herself. Floors, walls,
the barred windows. Everything had a nice, picturesque coat of crud. It smelled, too. She took a deep breath
so that she wouldn't forget the ripe stench of human sweat, bitter
coffee and strong disinfectant. And it was noisy. With every nerve on
sensory alert, she separated the din into ringing phones, angry
curses, weeping, and the clickety-clack of keyboards at work. Man, oh, man, she thought. Her luck was
really in. "You're not a tourist,
sweetheart," Alex reminded her, adding a firm nudge. "Sorry." The vibrant excitement in her eyes was
so out of place that he stared. Then, with a shake of his head, he
jabbed a finger toward a chair. He was letting the rookie get his
feet wet getting the vitals from Rosalie. Once they had her booked,
he'd take over himself, using charm or threats or whatever seemed
most expedient to make her talk to him about her two murdered
associates. "Okay." He took his seat
behind his battered and overcrowded desk. "You know the drill." She'd been staring at a young man of
about twenty with a face full of bruises and a torn denim jacket.
"Excuse me?" Alex just sighed as he rolled a form
onto his typewriter. "Name?" "Oh, I'm Bess." She held out
her hand in a gesture so natural and friendly he nearly took it. Instead, he swore softly. "Bess
what?" "McNee. And you're?" "In charge. Date of birth." "Why?" His eyes flicked up, arrowed hers. "Why
what?" "Why do you want to know?" . Patience, never his strong suit,
strained. He tapped a finger on the form. "Because I've got this
space to fill." "Okay. I'm twenty-eight. A Gemini.
I was born on June the first." Alex did the math and typed in the
year. ''Residence." Natural curiosity had her poking
through the folders and papers on his desk until he slapped her hand.
"You're awfully tense," she commented. "Is it because
you work undercover?" Damn that smile, he thought. It was
sassy, sexy, and far from stupid. That, and those sharp, intelligent
green eyes, might have fooled him. But she looked like a hooker, and
she smelled like a hooker. Therefore… "Listen, doll, here's the way this
works. I ask the questions, you answer them." "Tough, cynical, street-smart." One dark brow lifted. "Excuse me?" "Just a quick personality check.
You want my address, right?" she rattled off an address that
made both of Alex's brows raise. "Let's get serious." "Okay." Willing to oblige,
Bess folded her hands on the edge of his desk. "Your address," he repeated. "I just gave it to you." "I know what real estate goes for
in that area. Maybe you're good." Thoughtful, he scanned her
attributes one more time. "Maybe you're better than you look.
But you don't make enough working the streets to pop for that kind of
rent." Bess knew an insult when it hit her
over the head. What made it worse was that she'd spent over an hour
on her makeup. And she happened to know that her body was good. Lord
knew, she sweated to keep it that way by working out three days a
week. "That's where I live, cop." Her temper, which had a
habit of flaring quickly, had her upending her enormous canvas tote
onto his desk. Alex watched, fascinated, as she pawed
through the pile of contents. There were enough cosmetics to supply a
small department store. And they weren't the cheap kind. Six
lipsticks, two compacts, several mascara sticks and pots of eye
shadow. A rainbow of eyeliner pencils. Scattered with them were two
sets of keys, a snowfall of credit-card receipts, rubber bands, paper
clips, twelve pens—he counted—a few broken pencils, a
steno pad, two paperback books, matches, a leather address book
embossed with the initials ELM, a stapler—he didn't even pause
to wonder why she would carry one—tissues and crumpled papers,
a tiny micro-cassette recorder. And a gun. He whipped it out of the pile and
stared at it. A water gun. "Careful with that," she
warned as she found her overburdened wallet. "It's full of
ammonia." "Ammonia?" "I used to carry Mace, but this
works fine. Here." Pleased with herself, she pushed the open
wallet under his nose. It might have been her in the picture.
The hair was short and curly and chic, a deep chestnut rather than a
brassy blonde. But that nose, that chin. And those eyes. He frowned
over the driver's license. The address was right. "You got a car?" She shrugged and began to dump things
back into her purse. "So?" "Women in your position usually
don't." Because it made sense, Bess stalled.
"I've got a license. Everybody who has a license doesn't have to
have a car, do they?" "No." He jerked the wallet
out of her reach. "Take off the wig." Pouting a little, she patted it. "How
come?" He reached across the desk and yanked
it off himself. She scowled at him while she ran her fingers through
short, springy red curls. "I want that back. It's borrowed." "Sure." He tossed it onto his
desk before he leaned back in his squeaky chair for a fresh
evaluation. If this lady was a hooker, he was Clark Kent. "What
the hell are you?" It was time to come clean. She knew it.
But something about him egged her on. "I'm just a woman trying
to make a living, Officer." That was how Jade would handle it,
Bess was sure. And since Jade was her creation, Bess was determined
to do right by her. He opened the wallet, skimmed through
the bills. She was carrying around what would be for him more than
two weeks' pay. "Right." "Can you do that?" she
demanded, more curious than annoyed. "Go through my personal
property?" "Honey, right now you are my
personal property." There were pictures in the wallet, as well.
Snapshots of people, some with her, some without her. And the lady
was a card-carrying member of dozens of groups, including Greenpeace,
the World Wildlife Federation, Amnesty International and the Writers'
Guild. The last brought him back to the tape recorder. When he picked
up the little toy, he noted that it was running. "Let's have it,
Bess." God, he was cute. The thought passed
through her head as she smiled at him. "Have what?" "What were you doing hanging
around with Rosalie and the rest of the girls?" "My job." When his eyes
narrowed that way, Bess thought, he was downright irresistible.
Impatient, a little mean, with a flash of recklessness just barely
under control. Fabulous. "Really." All honesty and
cheap perfume, she leaned forward. "You see, it all has to do
with Jade, and how she's having this problem with a dual personality.
By day, she's a dedicated lawyer—a real straight arrow, you
know—but by night she hits the streets. She's blocking what
happened between her and Brock, and coupled with a childhood memory
that's begun to resurface, the strain's been too much for her. She's
on a path of self-destruction." The frown in his eyes turned them
nearly black. "Who the hell is Jade?" "Jade Sullivan Carstairs. Don't
you watch daytime TV?" His head was beginning to buzz. "No." "You don't know what you're
missing. You'd probably really enjoy the Jade-Storm-Brock story line.
Storm's a cop, you see, and he's falling in love with Jade. Her
emotional problems, and the hold Brock has on her, complicate things.
Then there was a miscarriage, and the kidnapping. Naturally, Storm
has problems of his own." "Naturally. What's your point?" "Oh, sorry. I get offtrack. I
write for 'Secret Sins' Daytime drama." "You're a soap-opera writer?" "Yeah." Unlike many in the
trade, she wasn't bothered by that particular label. "And I like
to get the feel of the situations I put my characters into. Since
Jade is a special pet of mine, I—" "Are you out of your mind?"
Alex barked the question as he leaned over into her face. "Do
you have any idea what you were doing?" She blinked, at once innocent and
amused. "Research?" He swore again, and Bess found she
liked the way he raked impatient fingers through his thick black
hair. "Lady, just how far were you intending to take your
research?" "How—? Oh." Her eyes
brightened with laughter. "Well no, not quite that far." "What the hell would you have done
if I hadn't been a cop?" "I'd have thought of something."
She continued to smile. He had a fascinating face—golden skin,
dark eyes, wonderful bones. And that mouth, so beautifully sculpted,
even if it did tend to scowl. "It's my job to think of things.
And when I spotted you, I thought you looked safe. What I mean is,
you didn't strike me as the kind of man who'd be interested in…"
What was a delicate way of putting it? she wondered. "Paying for
pleasure." He was so angry he wanted to yank her
up and toss her over his lap. The idea of administering a few good
whacks to that cute little butt was tremendously appealing. "And
if you'd guessed wrong?" "I didn't," she pointed out.
"For a minute there, I was worried, but it all worked out.
Better than I expected, really, because I had a chance to ride in
a—Do you still call them paddy wagons?" He'd been so sure he'd seen everything.
Heard everything. With his temper straining at the bit, he spoke
through clenched teeth. "Two hookers are dead. Two who worked
that area.'' "I know," she said quickly,
as if that explained it all. "That was one of the reasons I
chose it. You see, I plan to have Jade—" "I'm talking about you," he
interrupted in a voice that had her wincing. "You. Some
bubbleheaded hack writer who thinks she can strut around in spandex
and a half a ton of makeup, then go home to her nice neighborhood and
wash it all off." "Hack?" It was the only thing
she took offense to. "Look, cop—" "You look. You stay out of my
territory, and out of those slut clothes. Do your research out of a
book." Her chin shot out. "I can go where
I want, wearing what I want." "You think so?" There was a
way to teach her a lesson. A perfect way. "Fine." He rose,
tugged the tote out of her hands, then took a firm grip on her arm.
"Let's go." "Where?" "To holding, babe. You're under
arrest, remember?" She stumbled in the three-inch heels
and squawked, "But I just explained—" "I hear better stories before
breakfast every day." "You're not going to put me in a
cell." Bess was sure of it. Positive. Right up until the moment
the bars closed in her face. It took about ten minutes for the shock
to wear off. When it did, Bess decided it wasn't such a bad turn. She
could be furious with the cop—whoever he was—but she
could appreciate and take advantage of the unique opportunity he'd
given her. She was in a holding cell with several other women. There
was atmosphere to be absorbed, and there were interviews to be
conducted. When one of her cellmates informed her
that she was entitled to a phone call, she demanded one. Pleased with
the progress she was making, she settled back on her hard cot to talk
to her new acquaintances. It was thirty minutes later when she
looked up and spotted her friend and cowriter Lori Banes, standing
beside a uniformed policeman. "Bess, you look so natural here." With a grin, Bess popped up as the
guard unlocked the door. "It's been great." "Hey!" one of her cellmates
called out. "I'm telling you that Vicki's a witch, and Jeffrey
should boot her out. Amelia's the right woman for him." Bess sent back a wink. "I'll see
what I can do. 'Bye, girls." Lori didn't consider herself
long-suffering. She didn't consider herself a prude or a stuffed
shirt. And she said as much to Bess as they walked through the
corridors, up the stairs and back into the lobby area outside the
squad room. "But," she added, pressing fingers to her tired
eyes. "There's something that puts me off about being woken up
at 2:00 a.m. to come bail you out of jail." "Sorry, but it's been great. Wait
until I tell you." "Do you know what you look like,
dear?" "Yep." Unconcerned, Bess
craned her neck. The chair behind Alex's desk was empty. "I had
no idea that so many of the working girls watched the show. But they
do work nights, mostly. Uh, excuse me…" She caught the
sleeve of one of New York's finest as he walked by. "The officer
who uses that desk?" The cop swallowed the best part of a
bite of his pastrami sandwich. "Stanislaski?" "Whew. That's a mouthful. Is he
still around?" "He's in Interrogation." "Oh. Thanks." "Come on, Bess, we've got to pick
up your things." Bess had signed for her purse and its
contents, still keeping an eye out for Alex. "Stanislaski,"
she repeated to herself. "Is that Polish, do you think?" "How the hell do I know?" Out
of patience, Lori steered her toward the door. "Let's get out of
here. The place is lousy with criminals." "I know. It's fabulous." With
a laugh, she tucked an arm around Lori's waist. "I got ideas for
the next three years. If we decide to have Elana arrested for Reed's
murder…" "I don't know about having Reed
murdered." With a sigh, Bess looked around for a
cab. "Lori, we both know Jim isn't going to sign another
contract. He wants to try the big leagues. Having his character offed
is the perfect way to beef up Elana's story line." "Maybe." Bess slyly pulled out her ace. "'Our
Lives, Our Loves' picked up two points in the ratings last month." Lori only grunted. "Word is Dr. Amanda Jamison is
going to have twins." "Twins?" Lori shut her eyes.
Soap diva Ariel Kirkwood, who played the long-suffering psychiatrist
on the competing soap, was daytime's most popular star. "It had
to be twins," Lori muttered. "Okay, Reed dies." Bess allowed herself one quick-victory
smile, then hurried on. "Anyway, while I was in there, I
was picturing the elegant, cool Dr. Elana Warfield Stafford Carstairs
in prison. Fabulous, Lori. It'd be fabulous. I wish you'd seen the
cop." They'd walked to the corner, and there
wasn't a cab in sight. "What cop?" "The one who arrested me. He was
incredibly sexy." Lori only had the energy to sigh.
"Leave it to you to get busted by a sexy cop." "Really. All this thick black
hair. His eyes were nearly black, too. Very intense. He had all those
hollows and planes in his face, and this beautiful mouth. Nice build,
too. Sort of rough-and-ready. Like a boxer, maybe." "Don't start, Bess." "I'm not. I can find a man sexy
and attractive without falling in love." Lori shot her a look. "Since
when?" "Since the last time. I've sworn
off, remember?" Her smile perked up when she spotted a cab
heading their way. "I'm interested in this Stanislaski for
strictly professional reasons." "Right." Resigned, Lori
climbed in when the cab swung to the curb. "I swear." She lifted her
right hand to add impact to the oath. "We want to get into
Storm's head more, into his background and stuff. So I pick this
cop's brain a little." She gave a cabbie both her address and
Lori's. "After Jade gets attacked by the Millbrook Maniac, Storm
isn't going to be able to hold back his feelings for her. More has to
come out about who and what he is. If we do have Elana arrested for
Reed's murder, that's going to complicate his life—you know,
family loyalty versus professional ethics. And once he confronts
Brock—" "Hey." At a red light, the
cabbie turned, peering at them from under his fading Mets cap. "You
talking about 'Secret Sins'?" "Yeah." Bess brightened. "Do
you watch it?" "The wife tapes it every day. You
don't look familiar." "We're not on it," Bess
explained. "We write it." "Gotcha." Satisfied, he
punched the accelerator when the light changed. "Let me tell you
what I think about that two-timing Vicki." As he proceeded to do just that, Bess
leaned forward, debating with him. Lori closed her eyes and tried to
catch up on lost sleep.
Chapter 2
Contents - Prev/Next "My wife went nuts." Judd
Malloy munched on his cherry Danish while Alex swung in and out of
downtown traffic. "She's a big fan of that soap, you know? Tapes
it every day when she's in school." "Terrific." Alex had been
doing his best to forget his little encounter with the soap queen,
but his partner wasn't cooperating. "Holly figures it was just like
meeting a celebrity." "You don't find many celebrities
turning tricks." "Come on, Alex." Judd washed
down the Danish with heavily sugared coffee. "She wasn't,
really. You said so yourself, or the charges wouldn't have been
dropped." "She was stupid," Alex said
between his teeth. "Carrying a damn water pistol in that
suitcase of hers. I guess she figured if a John got rough, she'd blat
him between the eyes and that would be that." Judd started to comment on how it might
feel to get a blat of ammonia in the eyes, but didn't think his
partner wanted to hear it. "Well, Holly was impressed, and we
got some fresh juice out of Rosalie, so we didn't waste our time." "Malloy, you'd better get used to
wasting time. Stanislaski's rule number four." Alex spotted the
building he was looking for and double-parked. He was already out of
the car and across" the sidewalk before Judd found the NYPD sign
and stuck it in the window. "We sure as hell could be wasting it
here with this Domingo." "Rosalie said—" "Rosalie said what we wanted to
hear so we'd spring her," Alex told him. His cop's eyes were
already studying the building, noting windows, fire escapes, roof.
"Maybe she gave us the straight shot on Domingo, and maybe she
pulled it out of a hat. We'll see." The place was in good repair. No
graffiti, no broken glass or debris. Lower-middle-income, Alex
surmised. Established families, mostly blue-collar. He pulled open
the heavy entrance door, then scanned the names above the line of
mailboxes. "J. Domingo. 212." Alex
pushed the buzzer for 110, waited, then hit 305. The answering buzz
released the inner door. "People are so careless," he
commented. He could feel Judd's nerves shimmering as they climbed the
stairs, but he could tell he was holding it together. He'd damn well
better hold it together, Alex thought as he gestured Judd into
position, then knocked on the door of 212. He knocked a second time
before he heard the cursing answer. When the door opened a crack, Alex
braced his body against it to keep it that way. "How's it going,
Jesus?" "What the hell do you want?" He fit Rosalie's description, Alex
noted. Right down to the natty Clark Gable moustache and the gold
incisor. "Conversation, Jesus. Just a little conversation." "I don't talk to nobody at this
hour." When he tried to shove the door to,
Alex merely leaned on it and flipped open his badge. "You don't
want to be rude, do you? Why don't you ask us in?" Swearing in Spanish, Jesus Domingo
cracked the door a little wider. "You got a warrant?" "I can get one, if you want more
than conversation. I can take you down for questioning, get the
paperwork and do the job before your shyster lawyer can tap-dance you
out. Want a team of badges in here, Jesus?" "I haven't done nothing." He
stepped back from the door, a small man with wiry muscles who was
wearing nothing but a pair of gym shorts. "Nobody said you did. Did I say he
did, Malloy?" Enjoying himself, Judd stepped in
behind Alex. "Nope." The building might be
lower-middle-class, but Domingo's apartment was a small high-tech
palace. State-of-the-art stereo equipment, Alex noted. A big-screen
TV with some very classy video toys. The wall of tapes ran mostly to
the X-rated. "Nice place," Alex commented.
"You sure know how to make your unemployment check stretch." "I got a good head for figures."
Domingo plucked up a pack of cigarettes from a table, lighted one.
"So?" "So, let's talk about Angie
Horowitz." Domingo blew out smoke and scratched at
the hair on his chest. "Never heard of her." "Funny, we got word you were one
of her regulars, and her main supplier." "You got the wrong word." "Maybe you don't recognize the
name." Alex reached into his inside jacket pocket, and his
fingers brushed over his leather shoulder harness as he pulled out a
manila envelope. "Why don't you take a look?" He stuck the
police shot under Domingo's nose and watched his olive complexion go
a sickly gray. "Look familiar?" "Man." Domingo's fingers
shook as he brought his cigarette to his lips. "Problem?" Alex glanced down
at the photo himself. There hadn't been much left of Angie for the
camera. "Oh, hey, sorry about that, Jesus. Malloy, didn't I tell
you not to put the dead shot in?" Judd shrugged, feigning casualness. He
was thinking he was glad he didn't have to look at it again himself.
"Guess I made a mistake." "Yeah." All the while he
spoke, Alex held the photo where Domingo could see it. "Guy's a
rookie," he explained. "Always screwing up. You know. Poor
little Angie sure got sliced, didn't she? Coroner said the guy put
about forty holes in her. You can see most of them. Poor Malloy here
took one look and lost his breakfast. I keep telling him not to eat
those damned greasy Danishes before we go check out a stiff, but like
I said…" Alex grinned to himself as Domingo made a dash
for the bathroom. "That was cold, Stanislaski,"
Judd said, grinning. "Yeah, I'm that kind of guy." "And I didn't throw up my
breakfast." "You wanted to." The sounds
coming from the bathroom were as unpleasant as they get. Alex tapped
on the door. "Hey, Jesus, you okay, man? I'm really sorry about
that." He passed the photo and envelope to Judd. "Tell you
what, let me get you some nice cold water, okay?" The answer was a muffled retch that
Alex figured anyone could take for assent. He moved into the kitchen
and opened the freezer. The two kilos were exactly where Rosalie had
said he'd find them. He took one out just as Domingo rushed in. "You got no warrant. You got no
right." "I was getting you some ice."
Alex turned the frozen cocaine over in his hands. "This doesn't
look like a TV dinner to me. What do you think, Malloy?" By leaning a shoulder against the door
jamb, Judd blocked the doorway. "Not the kind my mother used to
make." "You son of a bitch." Domingo
wiped his mouth with a clenched fist. "You violated my civil
rights. I'll be out before you can blink." "Could be." Taking an
evidence bag out of his pocket, Alex slipped both kilos inside.
"Malloy, why don't you read our friend his rights while he's
getting dressed? And, Jesus, try some mouthwash." "Stanislaski," the desk
sergeant called out when Alex came up from seeing Domingo into a
cell. "You got company." Alex glanced over toward his desk,
seeing that several cops were huddled around it. There was quite a
bit of laughter overriding the usual squad room noise. Curiosity had
him moving forward even before he saw the legs. Legs he recognized.
They were crossed at the knee and covered almost modestly in a
canary-yellow skirt. He recognized the rest of her, too,
though the tough little body was clad in a multihued striped blazer
and a scoop-necked blouse the same color as the skirt. Half a dozen
slim columns of gold danced at her ears as she laughed. She looked
better, sexier, he was forced to admit, with her mouth unpainted, her
freckles showing, and those big green eyes subtly smudged with color.
Her hair was artfully tousled, a rich, deep red that made him think
of a mahogany statue his brother had carved for him. "So I told the mayor we'd try to
work it in, and we'd love for him to come on the show and do a
cameo." She shifted on the desk and spotted Alex. He was
frowning at her, his thumbs tucked into the pockets of a leather
bomber jacket. "Officer Stanislaski." "McNee." He inclined his
head, then swept his gaze over his fellow officers. "The boss
comes in and finds you here, I might have to tell him how you didn't
have enough work and volunteered to take some of mine." "Just entertaining your guest,
Stanislaski." But the use of the squad room's nickname for their
captain had the men drifting reluctantly away. "What can I do for you?" "Well, I—" "You're sitting on a homicide,"
he told her. "Oh." She scooted off the
desk. Without the stilettos, she was half a head shorter than he.
Alex discovered he preferred it that way. "Sorry. I came by to
thank you for straightening things out for me." "That's what they pay me for.
Straightening things out." He'd been certain she would rave a
bit about being tossed into a cell, but she was smiling, friendly as
a kindergarten teacher. Though he couldn't recall ever having a
teacher who looked like her. Or smelled like her. "Regardless, I appreciate it. My
producer's very tolerant, but if it had gone much further, she would
have been annoyed." "Annoyed?" Alex repeated. He
stripped off his jacket and tossed it onto his chair. "She'd
have been annoyed to find out that one of her writers was out
soliciting Johns down at Twenty-third and Eleventh Avenue." "Researching," Bess
corrected, unoffended. "Darla—that's my producer—she
gets these headaches. I gave her a whopper when I went on a job with
a cat burglar." "With a…" He let his
words trail off and eased down on the spot on the desk she'd just
vacated. "I don't think you want to tell me about that." "Actually, he was a former cat
burglar. Fascinating guy. I just had him show me how he'd break into
my apartment." She frowned a little, remembering. "I guess
he was a little rusty. The alarm—" "Don't." Alex held up a hand.
He was beginning to feel a headache coming on himself. "That's old news, anyway."
She waved it away with a cheerful gesture of her hands. "Do you
have a first name, or do I just call you Officer?" "It's Detective." "Your first name is Detective?" "No, my rank." He let out a
sigh. "Alex." "Alex. That's nice." She ran
a fingertip over the strap of his harness. She wasn't being
provocative; she wanted to know what it felt like. Once she knew him
better, she was sure, she'd talk him into letting her try it on.
"Well, Alex, I was wondering if you'd let me use you." He'd been a cop for more than five
years, and until this moment he hadn't thought anything could
surprise him. But it took him three seconds to close his mouth. "I
beg your pardon?" "It's just that you're so
perfect." She stepped closer. She really wanted to get a better
look at his weapon—without being obvious about it. She smelled like sunshine and sex. As
he drew it in, Alex thought that combination would baffle any man.
"I'm perfect?" "Absolutely." She looked
straight into his eyes and smiled. Her gaze was frank and assessing.
She was studying him, the way a woman might study a dress in a
showroom window. "You're exactly what I've been looking for." Her eyes were pure green. No hint of
gray or blue, no flecks of gold. There was a small dimple near her
mouth. Only one. Nothing about that odd, sexy face was balanced.
"What you're looking for?" "I know you're busy, but I'd try
not to take up too much of your time. An hour now and then." "An hour?" He caught himself
echoing her, and shook himself loose. "Listen, I appreciate—" "You're not married, are you?" "Married? No, but—" "That makes it simpler. It just
came to me last night when I was getting into bed.'" God. He'd learned to appreciate women
early. And he'd learned to juggle them skillfully—if he said so
himself. He knew how to dodge, when to evade and when to sit back and
enjoy. But with this one, all bets were off. "Is this heavy?" she asked,
fiddling with his harness. "You get used to it. It's just
there." Her smile warmed, making him think of
sunlight again. "Perfect," she murmured. "I'd be
willing to compensate you for your time, and your expertise." "You'd be—" He wasn't
certain if he was insulted or embarrassed. "Hold on, babe." "Just think about it," Bess
said quickly. "I know it's a lot to ask, but I have this problem
with Matthew." A brand-new emotion snuck in under his
guard, and it was as green as her eyes. "Matthew? Who the hell
is Matthew?" "We call him Storm, actually.
Lieutenant Storm Warfield, Millbrook PD." Now he definitely had a headache. Alex
rubbed his fingers against his temple. "Millbrook?" "The fictional town of Millbrook,
where the show's set. It's supposed to be somewhere in the Midwest.
Storm's a cop. Personally, his life's a mess, but professionally,
he's focused and intense and occasionally ruthless. In this new story
line I'm working on, I want to concentrate on his police work, the
routine, the frustrations." "Wait." He'd always been
quick, but it was taking him a minute to change gears. "You want
me to help you with a story line?" "Exactly. If you could just tell
me how you think, how you go about solving a case, working with the
system or around it. TV cops have to work around the system quite a
bit, you know. It plays better than by-the-book." He swore under his breath and rubbed
his hands over his face. Damn it, his palms were sweaty. "You're
a real case, McNee." "You don't have to decide right
now." She was also persistent. And she wondered if he had a
spare gun strapped to his calf. One of those sexy-looking little
chrome jobs. She'd seen that ploy in several movies. Still, she
thought if she asked him that, she'd lose her edge. "I'm having
a thing tonight." As she spoke, she dug into her huge bag for
her notebook. "Eight o'clock until whenever. Bring a friend, if
you like. Your partner, too. He seemed very sweet." "He's adorable." : "Yeah." She ripped off the
page and handed it to him. "I'd really like you to stop by." He took the sheet, not bothering to
remind her he already had her address. "Why?" "Why not?" She beamed at him
again. Before he could list the reasons, he
heard his name called. "Alexi." Alexi. Bess was already enchanted with
the sound as she rolled the name over in her head. Different, exotic.
Sexy. She was certain it suited him much more than the casual Alex. Bess studied the woman bearing down on
them. This wasn't one who'd be lost in a crowd, she mused. She was
stunning, totally self-assured and very pregnant. Beside Bess, Alex
pushed off the desk and sighed. "Rachel." "A moment of your time,
Detective," Rachel said, flipping a glance over Bess before
pinning Alex with a tawny stare. "To reacquaint you with civil
rights." "Your sister?" Bess surmised,
beaming at both of them. Alex sent her a considering frown. "How
did you know that?" "I'm really good with faces. Same
bone structure, same coloring, same mouth. You have to be brother and
sister, or first cousins." "Guilty," Rachel admitted.
Though she would have liked to know what Alex was doing with the
sharp-eyed redhead, she wasn't about to be swayed from her duties as
a public defender. "Jesus Domingo, Alexi. Illegal search and
seizure." "Bull." Alex crossed his arms
and leaned back against the desk. "You had a search warrant?" "Didn't need one. He invited us
in." "And invited you to poke through
his belongings, I suppose." "Nope." Alex grinned while
Bess watched them bounce the verbal ball as though they were champion
tennis players. "Jesus got sick. I offered to get him some
water. He didn't object. I opened the freezer to get the poor guy
some ice, and there it was. Two kilos. It'll all be in my report." "That's lame, Alexi. You'll never
get a conviction." "Maybe. Maybe not. Talk to the
DA." "I intend to." Rachel shifted
her briefcase and began to rub her belly in circular motions to
soothe the baby, who seemed to be doing aerobics in her womb. "You
had no probable cause." "Sit down." "I don't want to sit down." "The baby does." He yanked
over a chair and all but shoved her into it. "When are you going
to knock this off?" It did feel better to sit.
Indescribably better. But she wasn't about to admit it. "The
baby's not due for two months. I have plenty of time. We were
discussing…" "Rach." He laid a hand on her
cheek, very gently. A shouted curse wouldn't have stopped her, but
the small gesture did. "Don't make me worry about you.'' "I'm perfectly fine." "You shouldn't be here." "I'm having a baby. It's not
contagious. Now, about Domingo." Alex gave a brief, pithy opinion on
what could be done with Domingo. "Talk to the DA," he
repeated. "Sitting down." "She looks pretty strong to me,"
Bess commented. Two pair of eyes turned to her, one furious, the
other thoughtful. "Thank you. The men in my life are
coddlers," Rachel explained. "Sweet, but annoying." "Muldoon should take better care
of you," Alex insisted: "I don't need Zack to take care of
me. And the fact is, between him and Nick, I'm barely allowed to
brush my own teeth." She held out a hand to Bess. "Since my
brother is too rude to introduce me, I'm Rachel Muldoon." "Bess McNec. You're a lawyer?" "That's right. I work for the
public defender's office." "Really?" Bess's thoughts
began to perk. "What's it like to—" Alex held up a hand. "Don't get
her started. She'll pick your brain clean before you know she's had
her fingers in it. Look, McNee—" he turned to Bess,
determined not to be charmed by her easy smile "—we're a
little busy here." "Of course you are. I'm sorry."
Obligingly she swung her huge purse onto her shoulder. "We'll
talk tonight. Nice to meet you, Rachel." "Same here." Rachel ran her
tongue over her teeth, and both she and Alex watched Bess weave her
way out of the squad room. "Well, that was rude." "It's the only way to handle her.
Believe me." "Hmm… She seems like an
interesting woman. How did you meet her?" "Don't ask." He sat back down
on his desk, irked that the scent of sunshine and sex still lingered
in the air. "I can't believe we're doing
this." Holly, Judd's pretty wife of eight months, was all but
hopping out of her party shoes. "Wait until I tell everyone in
the teachers' lounge where I spent the evening." "Take it easy, honey." Judd
tugged at the tie she'd insisted he wear. "It's just a party." "Just a party?" As the
elevator rode up, she fussed with her honey-brown hair. "I don't
know about you two, but it isn't every day I get to eat canape's with
celebrities." Ominously silent, Alex stayed hunched
in his leather jacket. He didn't know what the hell he was doing
here. His first mistake had been mentioning the invitation to Judd.
No matter how insouciant Judd pretended to be, he'd been bursting at
the seams when he called his wife. Alex had been swept along in their
enthusiasm. But he wasn't going to stay. Holly's
sense of decorum might have insisted that she and Judd couldn't
attend without him, but he'd already decided just how he'd play it.
He'd go in, maybe have a beer and a couple of crackers. Then he'd
slip out again. He'd be damned if he'd spend this rare free evening
playing soap-opera groupie. "Oh, my" was all Holly could
say when the elevator doors opened. The walls of the private foyer were
splashed with a mural of the city. Times Square, Rockefeller Center,
Harlem, Little Italy, Broadway. People seemed to be rushing along the
walls, just as they did the streets below. It was as if the woman who
lived here didn't want to miss one moment of the action. The wide door to the main apartment was
open, and music, laughter and conversation were pouring out, along
with the scents of hot food and burning candles. "Oh, my," Holly said again,
dragging her husband along as she stepped inside. From behind them, Alex scanned the
room. It was huge, and it was packed with people. Draped in silk or
cotton, clad in business suits and lush gowns, they stood elbow to
elbow on the hardwood floor, lounged hip to hip on the sapphire
cushions of the enormous circular conversation pit, sat knee to knee
on the steps of a bronze circular staircase that led to an open loft
where still more people leaned against a railing decked with naked
cherubs. Two huge windows let the lights of the
city in. More partygoers sat on the pillow-plumped window seats,
balancing plates and glasses on their laps. Paintings were scattered over the
ivory-toned walls. Vivid, frenetic modern art, mind-bending
surrealism. There was enough color to make his head swim. Yet,
through the crowd and the clashing tones, he saw her. Dancing
seductively with a distinguished-looking man in a gray pinstriped
suit. She wore an excuse for a dress, the
color of crushed purple grapes. He wondered, irritated, if she owned
anything that covered those legs. This number certainly didn't. Nor
did it cover much territory at all, the way it dipped to the waist in
the back, skimmed above mid-thigh and left her shoulders bare, but
for skinny, glittery straps. Multihued gemstones fell in a rope from
her earlobes to those nicely sloped shoulders. Her feet were bare. She looked, Alex thought as his stomach
muscles twisted themselves into nasty knots, outrageously alluring. "Oh, Lord, there's Jade. Oh, and
Storm and Vicki. Dr. Carstairs, too." Holly's fingers dug into
her husband's arm. "It's Amelia." "Who?" "'Secret Sins,' dummy." She
gave Judd a playful punch. "The whole cast's here." "That's not all." Because he
remembered in time he was supposed to be jaded, Judd stopped himself
from pointing and inclined his head. "That's Lawrence D. Strater
dancing with our hostess. The L. D. Strater, of Strater Industries.
The Fortune 500's darling. The mayor's over in that corner, talking
with Hannah Loy, the grand old lady of Broadway." His excitement
began to hum in his voice as he continued to scan the room. "Man,
there are enough luminaries in this room to light every borough in
New York." But Alex hadn't noticed. Furthermore,
he didn't give a damn. His attention was focused on Bess. She'd
stopped dancing, and had leaned up to whisper something in her
partner's ear that made him laugh before he kissed her. Smack on the
lips. She kissed him back, too, her hands
lightly intimate at his waist, before she turned and spotted the new
arrivals. She waved, made her excuses, then scooted and dodged her
way through the crowd toward them. "You made it." She gave both
Alex and Judd a friendly peck on the cheek before holding out both
hands to Holly. "Nice to meet you." "My wife, Holly, this is Bess
McNee." "Thanks for asking us." Holly
caught herself starting to stutter, as she had the first time she
faced a classroom of ten-year-olds. She flushed. "My pleasure." Bess gave her
hands a reassuring squeeze. "Let's get you something to eat and
drink." She gestured toward a long table by the wall. Instead of
the useless finger food and fancy, unrecognizable dishes Alex had
expected, it was laden with big pots of spaghetti, mountains of
garlic bread, and generous trays of antipasti. "It's Italian night," she
explained, grabbing a plate and heaping it high. "There's plenty
of wine and beer, and a full bar." She handed the plate to Holly
and began to dish up another. "The desserts are on the other
side of the room. They're unbelievable." As she passed Judd a
plate, she noted the gleam in Holly's eyes. "Would you like to
meet some of the cast?" "Oh, I…" The hell with
sophistication. "Yes. I'd love it." "Great. Excuse us. Help yourself,
Alexi." "This is really something,"
Judd said over a mouthful of spaghetti. "Something," Alex agreed.
Deciding to make the best of it, he fixed himself a plate. He wasn't going to stay. But the food
was great. In any case, he didn't have anything else to do. It didn't
hurt to hang around and rub elbows with the fast and famous while he
was helping himself to a good hot meal. It certainly made a change
from his daily routine of wading through misery and bitterness. After washing down spaghetti with some
good red wine, he found himself a spot on a window seat where he
could sit back and watch the show. Bess dropped down beside him, clinked
her glass against his. "Best seat in the house." "Some house." "Yeah, I like it. I'll show you
the rest later, if you want." She broke off a tiny piece of the
pastry on his plate and sampled it. "Great stuff." "Yeah. You got a little…
here." Before his good sense could take over, he rubbed a bit of
the rich cream from her lip. Watching her, he licked it from the pad
of his thumb. And tasted her. "It's not bad." For a moment she wondered if the
circuits in her brain had crossed. Something certainly had sent out a
spark. She managed a small sound of agreement as she flicked her
tongue to the corner of her mouth. And tasted him. "Your, ah, partner's wife. Holly."
Small talk, any talk, had 'always come easily to her. She wasn't sure
why she was laboring now. "What about her?" "Who? Oh, right. Holly. She's
nice. I can't imagine what it would be like to teach fifth-graders." "I'm sure you'll ask her." "I already did." At ease
again, she smiled at him. Something about that sarcastic edge to his
voice made her relax and enjoy. "Come on, Alexi. We may be in
different professions, but both of them require a certain amount of
curiosity about human nature. Aren't you sitting here right now
wondering about all of these people, and what they're doing at my
party?" "Not as much as I'm wondering what
I'm doing at your party." He swirled the wine in his glass
before sipping. When he drank, his eyes stayed on hers. Watchful. She liked that. She liked that very
much, the way he could sit so still, energy humming from every pore,
while he watched. While he waited. Bess was willing to admit that one
of her biggest failings was being unable to wait for anything. "You were curious," she told
him. "Some." Her skirt hitched up another inch when
she curled her legs up on the seat. "I'd be happy to tell you
whatever you want to know, in exchange for your help. You see that
guy over there, the gorgeous one with the blonde hanging on his
biceps?" Alex scanned, homed in. "Yeah. I
wouldn't say he was gorgeous." "You're not a woman. That's my
detective, Storm Warfield, the black sheep of the snooty,
disgustingly rich Warfield clan, the rebel, the volatile brother of
the long-suffering Elana Warfield Stafford Carstairs. He's recently
pulled himself out of the destructive affair with the wicked, wily
Vicki. The blonde crawling up his chest. They're an item off-camera,
but on, Storm is madly in love with the tragedy-prone and ethereal
Jade, who is, of course, torn between her feelings for him and her
misplaced loyalty to the maniacally clever and dastardly Brock
Carstairs—half brother to Elana's stalwart husband Dr. Maxwell
Carstairs. Max was once married to Jade's formerly conniving but now
repentant sister, Flame, who was killed in a Peruvian earthquake soon
after the birth of her son—who may or may not be her husband's
child. Naturally, the body was never recovered." "Either I've had too much wine, or
you're making me dizzy." Bess smiled and gave him a
companionable pat on the thigh that sent his blood pressure soaring.
"It's really not that complicated, once you know the players.
But I want you for Storm." Alex sent the actor a considering look.
"I don't think he's my type." "Your professional expertise,
Detective. I need an informal technical advisor. My producer'd be
happy to compensate you for your time—particularly since we've
been number one in the ratings for the past nine months."
Someone called her name, and Bess sent a quick wave. "Looks like
it's going to start to thin out. Listen, can you hang around until
I've finished playing hostess?" She popped up and was gone before he
could answer. After a moment, Alex set the rest of the dessert aside
and rose. If he was going to see the party through, he might as well
enjoy himself. As she saw to the rest of her guests,
Bess kept an eye on him. Once he decided to relax, she noted, he made
the most of it. It didn't surprise her that he knew how to flirt, or
that several women in the room made a point of wandering in his
direction. Not even Lori—no pushover in the men department—was
unaffected. "So, that's the one who busted
you?" Lori asked her, popping a plump olive into her mouth. "What do you think?" Lori chewed, savored, swallowed.
"Yum-yum." With a laugh, Bess chose a wedge of
cheese. "I assume that's a comment on the man, not my buffet." "You bet. And the best part is,
he's not an actor." "Still sore?" Bess murmured. Lori shrugged, but her gaze cut over to
Steven Marshall, alias Brock Carstairs. "I never give him, or
his weenie little brain, a'thought. No sensible woman would spend her
life competing with an actor's ego for attention." "Sense has nothing to do with it." Lori looked away, because it hurt, more
than she could bear to admit, to watch Steven while he was so busy
ignoring her. "This from the queen of the bungled
relationships." "I don't bungle them, I enjoy
them." "I hasten to remind you that two
of your former fiance's are in this room." "It's a big party. Besides, I
wasn't engaged to Lawrence." "He gave you a ring with a
rock-the size of a Buick." "A token of his esteem," Bess
said blithely. "I never agreed to marry him. And Charlie and I…"
She waved to Charles Stutman, esteemed playwright. "We were only
engaged for a few months. We both agreed Gabrielle was perfect for
him and parted the closest of friends." "It was the first time I'd heard
of a woman being best man at her former fiancees wedding," Lori
admitted. "I don't know how you do it. You don't angst over men,
and they never toss blame your way when things fall apart." "Because I end up being a pal."
Bess's lips curved. For the briefest of moments, there was something
wistful in the smile. "Not always a position a woman craves, but
it seems to suit me." "Going to be pals with the cop?" Once again Bess found herself searching
the remaining guests for Alex. She found him, dancing slow and close
with a sultry brunette. "It would help if he'd bring himself to
like me a little. I think it's going to take some work." "I've never known you to fail.
I've got to go. See you Monday." "Okay." Bess was astute
enough to glance over in Steven's direction as Lori left. She was
also clear-sighted enough to see the expression of misery in his eyes
as he watched Lori walk to the elevator. People were much too hard on
themselves, she thought with a sigh. Love, she was certain, was a
complicated and painful process only if you wanted it to be. And she
should know, she mused as she took another sip of wine. She had
slipped painlessly in and out of love for years. As she set the glass aside, Alex caught
her eye. There was a quick, surprising tremor around her heart. But
it was gone quickly as someone swept her up into a dance.
Chapter 3
Contents - Prev/Next "How often do you have one of
these things?" Alex asked when he took Bess up on her offer of a
last cup of cappuccino in her now empty and horribly cluttered
apartment. "Oh, when the mood strikes."
The after-party wreckage didn't concern her. She and the cleaning
team she'd hired would shovel it out sooner or later. Besides, she
enjoyed this—the mess and debris, the spilled wine, the
lingering scents. It was a testament to the fact that she, and a good
many others, had enjoyed themselves. "Want some cold spaghetti?"
she asked him. "No." "I do." She unfolded herself
from the corner section of the pit and wandered over to the buffet.
"I didn't get a chance to eat much earlier—just what I
could steal off other people's plates." She came back to stretch
out on the cushions and twine pasta on her fork. "What did you
think of Bonnie?" "Who?" "Bonnie. The brunette you were
dancing with. The one who stuck her phone number in your pocket." Remembering, Alex patted his shirt
pocket. "Right. Bonnie. Very nice." "Mmm…she is." As she
agreed, Bess twined more pasta. She propped her feet on the coffee
table, where they continued to keep the beat of the low-volume rock
playing on the stereo. "I appreciate your staying." "I've got some time." "I still appreciate it. Let me run
this by you, okay?" She continued to eat, rapidly working her
way through a large plate full of food. "Jade's got a split
personality due to an early-childhood trauma, which I won't go into." "Thank God." "Don't be snide—millions of
viewers are panting for more. Anyway, Jade's alter ego, Josie, is the
hooker—or will be, once we start taping that story line.
Storm's nuts about Jade. It's difficult for him, as he's a very
passionate sort of guy, and she's fragile at the moment." "Because of Brock." "You catch on. Anyway, he's wildly
in love and miserably frustrated, and he's got a hot case to solve.
The Millbrook Maniac." "The—" Alex shut his
eyes. "Oh, man." "Hey, the press is always giving
psychotics catchy little labels. Anyway, the Maniac's going around
strangling women with a pink silk scarf. It's symbolic, but we won't
get into that right now, either." "I can't tell you how grateful I
am." She offered him a forkful of cold
pasta. After a moment, he gave in and leaned closer to take it. "Now,
the press is going to start hounding Storm," Bess continued.
"And the brass will be on his case, too. His emotional life is a
wreck. How does he separate it? How does he go about establishing a
connection between the three—so far—victims? And when he
realizes Jade may be in danger, how does he keep his personal
feelings from clouding his professional judgement?" ''That's the kind of stuff you want?" "For a start." "Okay." He propped his feet
beside hers. "First, you don't separate, not like you mean. The
minute you have to think like a cop, that's what you are, that's how
you think, and you've got no personal life until you can stop
thinking like a cop again." "Wait." Bess shoved the plate
into his lap, then bounded up and hunted through a drawer until she
came up with a notebook. She dropped onto the sofa again, curling up
her legs this time, so that her knee lay against the side of his
thigh. "Okay," she said, scribbling. "You're telling
me that when you start on a case, or get a call or whatever,
everything else just clicks off." Since she seemed to be through eating,
he set the plate on the coffee table. "It better click off." "How?" He shook his head. "There is no
how. It just is. Look, cop work is mostly monotonous. It's routine,
but it's the kind of routine you have to keep focused on. Make a
mistake in the paperwork, and some slime gets bounced on a
technicality." "What about when you're on the
street?" "That's a routine, too, and you'd
better keep your head on that routine, if you want to go home in one
piece. You can't starting thinking about the fight you had with your
woman, or the bills you can't pay, or the fact that your mother's
sick. You think about now, right now, or you won't be able to fix any
of those things later. You'll just be dead." Her eyes flashed up to his. He said it
so matter-of-factly. When she studied him, she saw that he thought of
it that way. "What about fear?" "You usually have about ten
seconds to be afraid. So you take them." "But what if the fear's for
someone else? Someone you love?" "Then you'd better put it aside
and do what you've been trained to do. If you don't, you're no good
to yourself or your partner, and you're a liability." "So, it's cut-and-dried?" He smiled a little. "Except on TV.
You're asking me for feelings, McNee, intangibles." "A cop's feelings," she told
him. "I'd think they would be very tangible. Maybe a cop
wouldn't be allowed to show his emotions on the job. An occasional
flare-up, maybe, but then you'd have to suck it in and follow
routine. And no matter how good you are, an arrest isn't always going
to stick. The bad guy isn't always going to pay. That has to cause
immeasurable frustration. And repressing that frustration…"
Considering, she tapped her pencil against the pad. "See, I
think of people as pressure cookers." "Sure you do." "No, really." That quick
smile, the flash of the single dimple. "Whatever's inside, good
or bad, has to have some means of release, or the lids blows."
She shifted again, and her fingers nearly brushed his neck. She
talked with them, he'd noted. With her hands, her eyes, her whole
body. The woman simply didn't know how to be still. "What do you
use to keep the lid on, Alexi?" "I make sure I kick a couple of
small dogs every morning." She smiled with entirely too much
understanding. "Too personal? Okay, we'll come back to it
later." "It's not personal." Damn it,
she made him uncomfortable. As if he had an itch in the small of his
back that he couldn't quite scratch. "I use the gym. Beat the
crap out of a punching bag a few days a week. Lift too many weights.
Sweat it out." "That's great. Perfect."
Grinning now, she cupped a hand over his biceps and squeezed. "Not
too shabby. I guess it works." She flexed her own arm, inviting
him to test the muscle. It was the gesture of a small boy on a
playground, but Alex couldn't quite think of her that way. "I
work out myself," she told him. "I'm addicted to it. But I
can't seem to develop any upper-body strength." He watched her eyes as he curled a hand
over her arm and found a tough little muscle. "Your upper body
looks fine." "A compliment." Surprised
that a reaction had leapt straight into her gut at the casual touch,
she started to move her arm. He held on. It took some work to keep
her smile from faltering. "What? You want to arm-wrestle,
Detective?" Her skin was like rose petals—smooth,
fragrant. Experimenting, he skimmed his hand down to the curve of her
elbow. She was smiling, he noted, and her eyes were lit with humor,
but her pulse was racing. "A few years back I arm-wrestled my
brother for his wife. I lost." The idea was just absurd enough to
catch her imagination. "Really? Is that how the Stanislaskis win
their women?" "Whatever works." Because he
was tempted to explore more of that silky, exposed skin, he rose. He
reminded himself that the uncomplicated Bonnie was more his style
than the overinquisitive, oddly packaged Bess McNee. "I have to
go." Whatever had been humming between them
was fading now. As Bess walked him to the door, she debated with
herself whether she wanted to let those echoes fade or pump up the
volume until she recognized the tune. "Stanislaski. Is that
Polish, Russian, what?" "We're Ukrainian." "Ukrainian?" Intrigued, she
watched him pull his jacket on. "From the southwest of the
European Soviet Union, with the Carpathian Mountains in the west." "Yeah." And through those
mountains his family had escaped when he was no more than a baby. He
felt a tug, a small one, as he often did when he thought of the
country of his blood. "You've been there?" "Only in spirit." Smiling,
she straightened his jacket for him. "I minored in geography in
college. I like reading about exotic places." She kept her hands
on the front of his jacket, enjoying the feel of leather, the scent
of it, and of him. Their bodies were close, more casual than
intimate, but close. Looking into his eyes, those dark, uncannily
focused eyes, she discovered she wanted to hear that tune again after
all. "Are you going to talk to me
again?" she asked him. His fingers itched to roam along that
tantalizingly bare skin on her back. For reasons he couldn't have
named, he kept his hands at his side. "You know where to find
me. If I've got the time and the answers, we'll talk." "Thanks." Her lips curved as
she rose on her toes so that their eyes and mouths were level. She
leaned in slowly, an inch, then two, to touch her mouth to his. The
kiss was soft and breezy. Either of his sisters might have said
goodbye to him in precisely the same manner. But that cool and
fleeting taste of her didn't make him feel brotherly. She heard the humming in her head. A
nice, quiet sound of easy pleasure. He tasted faintly of wine and
spices, and his firm lips seemed to accept the gesture as it was
meant—as one of affection and curiosity. Her lips were still
curved when she dropped back on her heels. "Good night, Alexi." He nodded. He was fairly sure he could
speak, but there was no point in taking the chance. Turning, he
walked into the foyer and punched the elevator button. When he
glanced back, she was still standing in the doorway. Smiling, she
waved another goodbye and started to close the door. It surprised them both when he whirled
around and slapped a hand on it to keep it open. The fact that she
took an automatic step in retreat surprised her further. But it was
the look in his eyes, she thought, that made her feel like a rabbit
caught in a rifle's cross hairs. "Did you forget something?" "Yeah." Very slowly, very
deliberately, he slid his arms around her waist, ran his hand up her
back, so that her eyes widened and her skin shivered. "I forgot
I like to make my own moves." Bess braced for the kind of wild
assault that was in his eyes, and was surprised for the third time in
as many minutes. He didn't swoop or crush, but eased her closer,
degree by degree, until she was molded to him. His fingers cruised
lazily up her back until they reached the nape of her neck, where
they cupped and held. Still his mouth hovered above her. His hand moved low, intimately, where
skin gave way to silk. "Stand on your toes," he murmured. "What?" "Stand on your toes." This
time, it was his lips that curved. Dazed, she obeyed, then gave a
strangled gasp when he increased the pressure on her back and pressed
them center to center. His eyes stayed open as he moved his mouth to
hers, brushing, nipping, then taking, in a dreamy kind of possession
that had her own vision blurring. The humming in her brain increased
until it was a wall of sound, unrecognizable. She was deaf to
everything else, even her own throaty moan as he dipped his tongue
between her lips to seduce hers. It was all slow-motion and soft-focus,
but that didn't stop the heat from building. She could feel the
little flames start to flare where she was pressed most intimately
against him, then spread long, patient fingers of fire outward.
Everywhere. He never pushed, he never pressured, he
savored, as a man might who had enjoyed a satisfying meal and was
content to linger over a tasty dessert. Even knowing she was being
sampled, tested, lazily consumed, she couldn't protest. For the first
time in her life, Bess understood what it was to be helplessly
seduced. He hadn't meant to do this. He'd been
thinking about doing just this for hours. However much pleasure it
gave him to feel her curvy body melt against his, to hear those
small, vulnerable sounds vibrating in her throat, to taste that dizzy
passion on her lips, he knew he'd made a mistake. She wasn't his
type. And he was going to want more. The instinct he'd been born with and
then honed during his years on the force helped him to hold back that
part of himself that, if let loose, could turn the evening into a
disaster for both of them. Still, he lingered another moment, taking
himself to the edge. When his system was churning with her, and his
mind was clouded with visions of peeling her out of that swatch of a
dress, he stepped back. He supported her by the elbows until her eyes
fluttered open. They were big and dazed. He clenched
his teeth to fight back the urge to pull her to him again and finish
what he'd started. But, however stunned and fragile she looked at the
moment, Alex recognized a dangerous woman. He'd been a cop long
enough to know when to face danger, and when to avoid it. "You, ah…" Where was
all her glib repartee? Bess wondered. It was a little difficult to
think when she wasn't sure her head was still on her shoulders.
"Well," she managed, and settled for that. "Well." He let her go and
added a cocky grin before he walked back to the elevator. Though his
stance was relaxed, he was praying the elevator would come quickly,
before he lost it and crawled back to her door. She was still there
when the elevator rumbled open. Alex let out a quiet, relieved breath
as he stepped inside and leaned against the back wall. "See you
around, McNee," he said as the doors slid shut. "Yeah." She stared at the
mural-covered walls. "See you around." "Holly hasn't been able to stop
talking about that party." Judd was scarfing down a blueberry
muffin as Alex cruised Broadway. "It made her queen of the
teachers' lounge." "I bet." Alex didn't want to
think about Bess's party. He especially didn't want to think about
what would be after the party. Work was what he needed to concentrate
on, and right now work meant following up on the few slim leads
they'd hassled out of Domingo. "If Domingo's given it to us
straight, Angie Horowitz was excited about a new John." Alex
tapped his fingers against the steering wheel. "He'd hired her
two Wednesdays running, dressed good, tipped big." Judd nodded as he brushed muffin crumbs
from his shirt. "And she was killed on a Wednesday. So was Rita
Shaw. It's still pretty thin, Alex." "So we make it thick." It
continued to frustrate him that they'd wasted time interrogating the
desk clerks at the two fleabag hotels where the bodies had been
found. Like most in their profession, the clerks had seen nothing.
Heard nothing. Knew nothing. As for the ladies who worked the
streets, however nervous they were, they weren't ready to trust a
badge. "Tomorrow's Wednesday," Judd
said helpfully. "I know what the hell tomorrow is.
Do you do anything but eat?" Judd unwrapped another muffin. "I
got low blood sugar. If we're going to go back and look at the crime
scene again, I need energy." "What you need is—"
Alex broke off as he glanced past Judd's profile and into the glaring
lights of an all-night diner. He knew only one person with hair that
shade of red. He began to swear, slowly, steadily, as he searched for
a parking place. "You really write for TV?"
Rosalie asked. Bess finished emptying a third
container of nondairy product into her coffee. "That's right." "I didn't think you were a
sister." Interested as much in Bess as in the fifty dollars
she'd been paid, Rosalie blew out smoke rings. "And you want to
know what it's like to turn tricks." "I want to know whatever you're
comfortable telling me." Bess shoved her untouched coffee aside
and leaned forward. "I'm not sitting in judgment or asking for
confidences, Rosalie. I'd like your story, if you want to tell it. Or
we can stick with generalities." "You figure you can find out
what's going on on the streets by putting on spandex and a wig, like
you did the other night?" "I found out a lot," Bess
said with a smile. "I found out it's tough to stand in heels on
concrete for hours at a time. That a woman has to lose her sense of
self in order to do business. That you don't look at the faces. The
faces don't matter—the money does. And what you do isn't a
matter of intimacy, not even a matter of sex—for you—but
a matter of control." She scooted her coffee back and took a
sip. "Am I close?" For a moment, Rosalie said nothing.
"You're not as stupid as you look." "Thanks. I'm always surprising
people that way. Especially men." "Yeah." For the first time,
Rosalie smiled. Beneath the hard-edged cosmetics and the lines life
had etched in her face, she was a striking woman, not yet thirty.
"I'll tell you this, girlfriend, the men who pay me see a body.
They don't see a mind. But I got a mind, and I got a plan. I've been
on the streets five years. I ain't going to be on them five more." "What are you going to do? What do
you want to do?" "When I get enough saved up, I'm
going South. Going to get me a trailer in Florida, and a straight
job. Maybe selling clothes. I look real fine in good clothes."
She crushed out her cigarette and lit another. "Lots of us have
plans, but don't make it. I will. I'm clean," she said, and
lifted her arms, turning them over. It took Bess a minute to realize
Rosalie was saying she wasn't a user. "One more year, I'm gone.
Less than that, if I hook on to a regular John with money. Angie
did." "Angie?" Bess flipped through
her mental file. "Angie Horowitz? Isn't that the woman who was
murdered?" "Yeah." Rosalie moistened her
lips before sucking in smoke. "She wasn't careful. I'm always
careful." "How can you be careful?" "You keep yourself ready,"
Rosalie told her. "Angie, she liked to drink. She'd talk a John
into buying a bottle. That's not being careful. And this guy, the
rich one? He—" "What the hell do you think you're
doing?" Both Rosalie and Bess looked up.
Standing beside the scarred table was a tall man with thin shoulders.
There was a cheroot clamped between his teeth, and a diamond winked
on his finger. His face was moon-pale, with furious blue eyes. His
hair was nearly as white, and slicked back, ending in a short
ponytail. "I'm having me a cup of coffee and
a smoke, Bobby," Rosalie told him. But beneath the defiance,
Bess recognized the trickle of fear. "You get back on the street where
you belong." "Excuse me." Bess offered her
best smile. "Bobby, is it?" He cast his icy blue eyes on her. "You
looking for work, sweetheart? I'll tell you right now, I don't
tolerate any loafing." "Thank you, but no, I'm not
looking. Rosalie was just helping me with a small problem." "She doesn't solve anyone's
problems but mine." He jerked his head toward the street. "Move
it." Bess slid out of the booth but held her
ground. "This is a public place, and we're having a
conversation." "You don't talk to anybody I don't
tell you to talk to." Bobby gave Rosalie a hard shove toward the
door. Bess didn't think, simply reacted. If
she detested anything, it was a bully. "Now just a damn minute."
She grabbed his sleeve. He rounded on her. Other patrons put on their
blinders when he pushed her into the table. Bess came up, fists
clenched, just as Alex slammed through the door. "One move, Bobby," he said
tightly. "Just one move toward her." Bobby brushed at his sleeve and
shrugged. "I just came in for a cup of coffee. Isn't that right,
Rosalie?" "Yeah." Rosalie closed her
hand over the business card Bess had slipped her. "We were just
having some coffee." But Alex's eyes were all for Bess. She
didn't look pale and frightened. Her eyes were snapping, and her
cheeks were flushed with fury. "Tell me you want to press
charges." "I'm sorry." With an effort,
Bess relaxed her hands. "We were just having a conversation.
Nice talking to you, Rosalie." "Sure." She swaggered out,
blowing smoke in Alex's face for effect. "Take off." Bobby moved his shoulders again,
smirked. "The coffee's lousy here, anyway." He flicked a
glance at Bess. "Next time, sweetheart." Alex waited ten humming seconds after
the door swung shut. Without a word, he stalked over to Bess and
grabbed her by the arm and hustled her out the door. "Look, if this is a
knight-in-shining-armor routine, I appreciate it, but I don't need
rescuing." "You need a straitjacket." With murder in his heart, he dragged
her half a block. "In the car," he snapped,
opening the back door of the patrol car. "A cab would be—" He swore, put a hand on her head and
shoved her into the back seat. Resigned, Bess settled back. "Hi,
Judd," she said as he took his place in the passenger seat in
front. "How's Holly?" "Great, thanks." He slanted a
look toward his partner. "Ah, she really had a good time at your
place." "I'm glad. We'll have to do it
again." Alex whipped out into traffic with enough force to have
her slamming back against the seat. Without missing a beat, Bess
crossed her legs. "Am I allowed to ask where we're going, or is
this another bust?" "I should be taking you to
Bellevue, where you belong," Alex responded. "But I'm
taking you home." "Well, thanks for the lift." His eyes flashed to hers in the
rearview mirror. Her face was still flushed, and her irises were a
sharp enough jade to slice to the bone, but she looked more miffed
than upset. Miffed, he thought with a snort. Stupid word. It fit her
perfectly. "You're an idiot, McNee. And, like
most idiots, you're dangerous." "Oh, really?" She scooted up
in the seat so that she could lean between him and Judd. "Just
how do you figure that, smart guy?" "Not only do you go back down to
an area you have no business even knowing about—" "Give me a break." "But," he continued, "you
sit there drinking coffee with a hooker, then pick a fight with her
pimp. The kind of guy who'd as soon give a woman a black eye as wish
her good-morning." Bess poked a finger at his shoulder. "I
didn't pick a fight with anyone, and if I had, it would be my
business." "That's why you're an idiot." "Hey, Alex, ease off." "Keep out of this," Alex and
Bess snarled in unison. "I'm not even here," Judd
mumbled, scooting down in his seat. "It so happens I was conducting an
interview." Bess folded her arms on the seat so that she
wouldn't give in to the nasty urge to twist Alex's ear. "In a
public place," she added. "And you had no right to come
bursting in and ruining everything before I'd finished." "If I hadn't come bursting in,
babe, you'd have had your nose broken again." She scowled, wrinkling her undeniably
crooked nose. "I can defend my nose, and anything else, just
fine." "Yeah, anyone can see you're a
regular amazon. Ow!" He slapped at her hand and swore the air
blue when she gave in and twisted his ear. "The minute I get you
out of this car, I'm going to—" "Uh, Alex?" "I told you to keep out of it." "I'm out," Judd assured him.
"But you might want to take a look at the liquor store coming up
at nine o'clock." Still steaming, Alex did, then let out
a heavy sigh. "Perfect. This makes it perfect. Call it in." Bess watched, wide-eyed, as Judd
radioed in an armed robbery in progress, gave their location and
requested backup. Before she could shut her gaping mouth, Alex was
swinging to the curb. "You," he said, stabbing a
finger in her face. "Stay in the car, or I swear I'll wring your
neck." "I'm not going anywhere,"
Bess assured him after she managed to swallow the large ball of fear
lodged in her throat. But before the words were out, he and Judd were
out of the car and drawing their weapons. He'd already forgotten her, she
realized as she stared at his profile. Before he and Judd had crossed
the street, he'd put on his cop's mind and his cop's face. She'd seen
hundreds of actors try to emulate that particular look. Some came
close, she realized, but this was the real thing. It wasn't grim or
fierce, but flat, almost blank. Except for the eyes, she thought with a
quick shudder. She'd had only one glimpse of his eyes, but it had
been enough. Life and death had been in them, and a
potential for violence she would never have guessed at. In the darkened car, she gripped her
hands together and prayed. He hadn't forgotten her. It infuriated
him that he had to fight to tuck her into some back corner of his
mind. There were innocent people in that store. A man and a woman. He
could smell the fear while he was still three yards away. But he broke his concentration long
enough to glance back and make certain she was staying put. He gestured Judd to one side of the
door while he took the other. He didn't have time to worry that the
rookie might freeze. Right now they were just two cops, and he had to
believe Judd would go with him through the door. The 9 mm felt warm in his hand. He'd
already identified the weapons of the two perpetrators. One had a
sawed-off shotgun, the other a wicked-looking .45. He could hear the
woman crying, pleading not to be hurt. Alex ignored it. They would
wait for backup as long as they could. He shifted just enough to look inside. Behind the counter, a woman of
approximately sixty stood with her hands at her throat, weeping. A
man of about the same age was emptying the cash register as fast as
his trembling hands allowed. One of the gunmen grabbed a bottle off a
shelf. He ripped off the top and guzzled. Swearing at the old man, he
smashed the bottle on the counter and jabbed the broken glass toward
his face. Alex had seen the look before, and he
knew they wouldn't be content with the money. "We're going in,"
he whispered to Judd. "You go low, go for the one on the right." Pale, Judd nodded. "Say when." "Don't fire your weapon unless you
have to." Alex sucked in his breath and went through the door.
"Police!" In the back of his mind he heard the sirens from
the backup as the first gunman swung the shotgun in his direction.
"Drop it!" he ordered, knowing it was useless. The woman
was already screaming before the first shots were fired. The shotgun blew out a bank of
fluorescent lights as the force of Alex's bullet sent the man
slamming backward. Alex was getting the second man in his sights when
a bullet from the .45 slammed into a bottle inches above his head,
spraying alcohol and glass. Judd fired, and stopped being a rookie. Slowly, with the same blank look on his
face, Alex came out of his crouch and studied his partner. Judd
wasn't pale now. He was green. "You okay?" "Yeah." After replacing his
weapon, Judd rubbed the back of his hand over his mouth. There was a
greasy knot in his stomach that was threatening to leap into his
throat. "It was my first." "I know. Go outside." "I'm okay." Alex gave him a nudge on the shoulder.
His hand remained there a moment, surprisingly gentle. "Go
outside anyway. Tell the backup to call an ambulance." Bess was waiting beside the car when
Alex came out some twenty minutes later. He looked the same, she
thought. Just the same as he'd looked when he walked in. Then he
lifted his head and looked at her, and she saw she was wrong. His eyes hadn't looked so tired, so
terribly tired, twenty minutes before. "I told you to stay in the car." "I did." "Then get back in." Gently she laid a hand on his arm.
"Alexi, you made your point. I'll take a cab. You have things to
do." "I've done them." He skirted
the car and yanked open the passenger door. She could almost feel his
body vibrating, but when he spoke, his voice was firm, sharp. "Get
in the damn car, Bess." She didn't have the heart to argue, so
she crossed over and complied. "What about Judd?" "He's heading to the cop shop to
file the report." "Oh." He let the silence hang for three
blocks. It hadn't been his first, but he hadn't told Judd that the
bright, shaky sickness didn't fade. It only turned inward, becoming
anger, disgust, frustration. And you never stopped asking yourself
why. "Aren't you going to ask how it
felt? What went through my mind? What happens next?" "No." She said it quietly. "I
don't have to ask when I can see. And it's easy enough to find out
what happens next." It wasn't what he wanted. He didn't
want her to be understanding, or quietly agreeable, or to turn those
damned sympathetic eyes on him. "Passing up a chance for grist
for your mill? McNee, you surprise me. Or can't your TV cop blow away
a couple of stoned perps?" He was trying to hurt her. Well, she
understood that, Bess thought. It often helped to lash
out when you were in pain. "I'm not sure I can fit it into any
of our scheduled story lines, but who knows?" His hands clenched on the wheel. "I
don't want to see you down there again, understand? If I do, I swear
I'll find a way to lock you up for a while." "Don't threaten me, Detective. You
had a rough night, and I'm willing to make allowances, but don't
threaten me." Leaning back, she shut her eyes. "In fact, do
us both a favor and don't talk to me at all." He didn't, but when he pulled up at her
building, the smoke from his anger was still hanging in the air.
Satisfied, she slammed out of the car. She'd taken two steps when he
caught up with her. "Come here," he demanded, and
hauled her against him. She tasted it, all the violence and pain and
fury of what he'd done that night. What he'd had to do. There was no
way for her to comfort. She wouldn't have dared. There was no way for
her to protest. She couldn't have tried. Instead, she let the
sizzling passion of the kiss sweep over her. Just as abruptly, he let her go. He'd
be trembling in a minute, and he knew it. God, he needed…
something from her. Needed, but didn't want. "Stay off my turf, McNee." He
turned on his heel and left her standing on the sidewalk.
Chapter 4
Contents - Prev/Next When it comes to murder," Bess
mused, "I like a nice, quick-acting poison. Something exotic, I
think." Lori pursed her lips. "If we're
going to do it, I really think he should be shot. Through the heart." Shifting in her seat at the cluttered
table, Bess scooped up a handful of sugared almonds. "Too
ordinary. Reed's a sophisticated, sensuous cad. I think he should go
out with more than just a bang." She munched and considered. "In
fact, we could make it a slow, insidious poison—milk a few
weeks of him wasting away." "Nagging headaches, dizzy spells,
loss of appetite," Lori put in. "And chills. He really should have
chills." Bess steepled her hands and imagined. "He gives
this big cocktail party, see. You know how he likes to flaunt his
power and money in the faces of all the people he's dumped on over
the years." Lori sighed. "That's why I love
him." "And why millions of viewers love
to hate him. If we're going to take him out, let's do it big. They're
all there at Reed's mansion… Jade, who's never forgiven him
for using her sister for his own evil ends. Elana, who's agonizing
over the fact that Reed will use his secret file, distorting the
information to discredit Max." "Mmm…" Getting into
the spirit, Lori gestured with her watered-down soft drink. "Brock,
who's furious that with one phone call Reed can upset the delicate
balance of the Tryson deal and cost Brock a fortune. And Miriam, of
course." "Of course. We haven't seen nearly
enough of her lately. Reed's self-destructive ex-wife, who blames him
for all her problems." "Justifiably," Lori pointed
out. "Then there's Vicki, the woman
scorned. Jeffrey, the cuckolded husband." She grinned. "And
the rest of the usual suspects." "Okay. What kind of poison?" "Something rare," Bess mused.
"Maybe Oriental. I'll work on it." She scribbled a reminder
on a notepad. "So they all have a motive for killing him. Even
the housekeeper, because he seduced her naive, innocent daughter,
then cast her aside. Sometime during the party, we see a glass of
champagne. The room's in shadows. Close-up on a small black vial. A
hand pours a few drops into the glass." "We'll see if it's a man or
woman." "The hand's gloved," Bess
decided, then realized how ridiculous it would be to wear gloves at a
cocktail party. "Okay, okay, we don't see it at the party.
Before. There's this box, see? This ornately carved wooden box." "And the gloved hand opens it.
Candlelight flickers off the glass vial as the hand removes it from
the bed of velvet." "That's the ticket. We'll cut to
that kind of thing three or four times during the week of the party.
Let the audience know it's bad business for somebody." "Meanwhile, Reed's playing
everyone like puppets. Handing out his personal brand of misery,
building the pressure to the boiling point, until it explodes on the
night of the party." "It'll be great," Bess
assured her. "Throughout the evening, Reed's enjoying himself
stirring up old fires, poking at sores. Miriam has too much to drink
and gets sloppy and shrill. This provides the perfect distraction for
our killer to doctor Reed's champagne. Because it's slow-acting, the
symptoms don't begin to show right away. We have some fatigue, a
little dizziness, some minor pain. Maybe a rash." "I like a good rash," Lori
agreed. "By the time he kicks off, it'll
be difficult for the cops to pinpoint the time and place when the
poison was administered. We just might have the perfect crime." "There is no perfect crime." Both Bess and Lori glanced toward the
doorway. Alex stood there, his hands tucked in his pockets. There was
a half smile on his face, a result of his enjoyment at listening to
them plotting a murder. "Besides, if your TV cop didn't figure
it out, your viewers would be pretty disappointed." "He'll figure it out." Bess
reached for another almond as she watched him, her bare feet propped
on the chair beside her. Alex discovered that the baggy slacks she
wore effectively hid her legs but didn't stop him from thinking about
them. "Did somebody call a cop?" she asked Lori. "Not me." Well aware that
three was most definitely a crowd, Lori rose. "Listen, I've got
to make a call, and I think I'll run up and peek in on the taping.
Nice to see you, Detective." "Yeah." He shifted so that
Lori could get through the door, but he didn't step inside. Instead,
he glanced around, annoyed with himself for feeling so awkward. "Some
place," he said at length. Bess's lips curved. The room was hardly
bigger than a closet and windowless. The table where she and Lori
worked was covered with books, folders and papers, and dominated by a
word processor that was still humming. Besides the table, there was
one overstuffed chair, a small couch and two televisions. "We call it home," Bess said,
and tilted her head. "So, what brings you down to the dungeons,
Alexi?" The description was fairly apt. They
were in the basement of the building that held the studios and
production offices for 'Secret Sins' and its network. He shrugged off
her question with one of his own. "How long are you in for?" "The duration, I hope."
Casually she rubbed the ball of one foot over the instep of the
other. "After the last Emmy, they did offer us an upstairs
office with a view, but Lori and I are creatures of habit. Besides,
who's going to come down here and peek over our shoulders while we
write?" She recrossed her ankles. "Are you off-duty?" "I took a couple hours personal
time." "Oh." She drew the word out,
thinking he looked very appealing when he was embarrassed. "Should
I consider this a personal visit?" "Yeah." He stepped inside,
then regretted it. There wasn't enough room to wander around.
"Listen, I just wanted to apologize." It was probably very small of her, Bess
thought, but, oh, she was enjoying this. "Generally or
specifically?" "Specifically." He shook his
head when she held out the bowl of almonds. "After the robbery
attempt, when I took you home. I was out of line." "Okay." She set the bowl down
and smiled at him. "We're dealing with your behavior during the
last half hour of the evening." His brows drew together. "Everything
I said before that sticks. You had no business doing what you were
doing, where you were doing it." "Get back to the apology. I like
that better." "I took what I was feeling out on
you, and I'm sorry." Figuring the worst was over, he sat on the
edge of the table. "You didn't react the way I expected." "Which was?" "Scared, outraged, disgusted."
He shrugged again. "I don't usually take women to armed
robberies." Now things were getting interesting.
"Where do you take them?" His gaze locked on hers. He knew when
he was being teased, and he knew when it was good-natured. "To
dinner, to the flicks, dancing. To bed." "Well, armed robbery is probably
more exciting. At least than the first three." She rose, placed
her hands on his shoulders and kissed him lightly on the mouth. "No
hard feelings." When his hands came to her hips and held her in
place, she lifted a brow. "Was there something else?" "I've been thinking about you." "That could be good." His lips twitched. "I haven't
decided that yet. Maybe we could start with dinner." "Start what?" "Working our way to bed. That's
where I want you." "Oh." Her breath came out a
little too quickly and not quite steady. It didn't help that his eyes
were calm, amused and very confident. How, she wondered, had their
positions been so neatly reversed? "That's certainly cutting to
the chase." "You said once that people in our
professions observe people. What I've observed about you, McNee, is
that you'd probably see through any flowers and moonbeams I might
toss at you." Slowly she ran her tongue over her
teeth. "Depends on your pitching arm. The idea isn't without its
appeal, Alexi, but I prefer taking certain aspects of my life—sex
being one of them—in a cautious, gradual manner." He grinned at her. "That could be
good." She had to laugh. "Meanwhile—"
But he didn't let her scoot back. "Meanwhile," he echoed,
keeping his hands firm. "Have dinner with me. Just dinner." Hadn't she told herself she wasn't
going to get involved again, fall in love again? Oh, well. "I
often enjoy just dinner." "Tomorrow. I'm on tonight." "Tomorrow's fine." He nudged her an inch closer. "I'm
making you nervous." "No, you're not." Yes, he
was. "You're wriggling." He
grinned again, surprised at how satisfying it was to know he'd
unsettled her. "I've got work, that's all." "Me too. Why don't I come by about
seven-thirty? My brother-in-law's got this place. I think you'll get
a kick out of it." "Lady clothes or real clothes?" "What are you wearing now?" She glanced down at her sweater and
slacks. "Real ones." "That'll do." He stood, then
tilted her chin with a finger until they were eye-to-eye. "You
have the oddest face,'' he said half to himself. "You should be
ugly." She laughed, unoffended. "I was.
I've burned all pictures of me before the age of eighteen." Her
dimple winked out as she smiled at him. "I imagine you were
always gorgeous." He winced, though he knew he should be
used to having that term applied to him. "My sisters were
gorgeous," he told her. "Are. My brother and I are ruggedly
attractive." "Ah, manly men." "You got it." "And you grew up surrounded by
flocks of adoring females." "We started with flocks and moved
on to hordes." Her eyes lit with amusement and
curiosity. "What was it like to—" He cut her off the most sensible way.
He liked the quick little jolt her body gave before she settled into
him. And the way her mouth softened, accepted. No pretenses here, he
thought as she gave a quiet sigh and melted into the kiss. It was
simple and easy, as basic as breathing. If his system threatened to overcharge,
he knew how to control it. Perhaps he drew the kiss out longer than
he'd intended to, deepened it more than he had planned. But he was
still in control. Maybe, for just a moment, he imagined what it would
be like to lock the door, to sweep all those papers off the table and
take her, fast and hot, on top of it. But he wasn't a maniac. He reminded
himself of that, even as his blood began to swim. A slow and gentle
touch brought pleasure to both, and let a woman see that she was
appreciated for everything she was. "Dangerous," he murmured in
Ukrainian as he slid his mouth from her. "Very dangerous woman." "What?" She blinked at him
with eyes that were arousingly unfocused and heavy. "What does
that mean?" He had to make a conscious effort to
keep his hands gentle at her shoulders. "I said I have to go.
Keep off the streets, McNee." She called to him as he reached the
doorway. "Detective." Her heart was thumping, her head was
reeling, but she really hated not having the last word. For lack of
anything better, she dredged up an old line from "Hill Street
Blues." "Let's be careful out there." Alone, she lowered herself into a
chair, as carefully as an elderly aunt. Five minutes later, Lori
found her in exactly the same spot, still staring into space. "Uh-oh." One look had Lori
dropping down beside her. With a shake of her head, she handed Bess a
fresh soft drink. "I knew it. I knew this was going to happen
the minute I saw that gorgeous cop at your party." "It hasn't happened yet."
Bess took a long drink. Funny, she hadn't realized how dry her throat
had become. "I'm afraid it's going to, but it hasn't happened
yet." "You had that same look on your
face when you fell for Charlie. And for Sean. And Miguel. Not to
mention—" "Then don't." Frowning, she
focused on Lori. "Miguel? Are you certain? I was sure I had
better taste." "Miguel," Lori said
ruthlessly. "Granted, you came to your senses within forty-eight
hours, but the day after he took you to the opera you had the same
stupid look on your face." "We saw Carmen," Bess pointed
out. "I don't think the look had anything to do with him.
Besides, I'm not in love with Alexi, I'm just having dinner with him
tomorrow." "That's what you always say. Like
with George." Bess's shoulders straightened. "George
was the sweetest man I've ever known. Being engaged to him taught me
a lot about understanding and compassion." "I know. You were understanding
enough to be godmother to his firstborn." "Well, after all, I did introduce
him to Nancy." "And he promptly dumped you and
ran off with her." "He didn't dump me. I wish you
wouldn't hold that against him, Lori. Breaking our engagement was a
mutual decision." "And the best thing to happen to
you. George was a wimp. A whiny wimp." Because it was precisely true, Bess
sighed. "He just needed a lot of emotional support." "At least you never slept with
him." "He was saving himself." They looked at each other and burst out
laughing. Once she caught her breath, Bess shook her head. "I
should never have told you that. It was indiscreet." "Observation," Lori
announced, and Bess gestured a go-ahead. "The cop isn't going to
save himself." "I know." Bess felt the
warning flutter in her stomach. Thoughtfully she drew her finger down
through the moisture on the bottle. "I'll cross that bridge when
I come to it." "Bess, you don't cross bridges,
you bum them." Lori gave her hand a quick squeeze. "Don't
get hurt." There was a touch of regret in Bess's
smile. "Do I ever?" Alex liked the way she looked. It took
a certain panache, he supposed, to be able to wear the jade-toned
blouse with bright blue slacks, particularly if you were going to add
hot-pink high-tops. But Bess pulled it off. Everything about her was
vivid. He supposed that was why he'd gone into her office to
apologize and ended up asking her out. It was probably why he hadn't been able
to get her, or the idea of taking her to bed, out of his mind since
he'd met her. For herself, Bess took one look at
Zackary Muldoon's bar, Lower the Boom, and knew she had a relaxed,
enjoyable evening in store. There was music from the juke box, a
babble of voices, a medley of good, rich scents. The tangle of
pear-shaped gemstones at her ears swung as she turned to Alex. "This
is great. Is the food as good as it smells?" "Better." He gave a wave in
the general direction of the bar as he found them a table. As usual, the bar was cluttered with
people and thick with noise. Since his sister had married Zack, Alex
had made a habit of dropping in once a week or so, and he knew most
of the regulars by name. He grinned at the waitress who stopped at
their table. "Hey, Lola. How's it going?" "It'll do, cutie." Resting
her tray on her hip, Lola gave Bess the once-over. Though less than
ten years Alex's senior, Lola had taken a maternal interest in him.
It wasn't often Alex brought a date into the bar, and Lola made it
her business to check out his current lady. "So, what can I get
you?" "Tequila." Bess dropped her
bag in the empty chair beside her with a thunk. "Straight up." Alex only lifted a brow at Bess's
choice. "Give me a beer, Lola. Rachel around?" "Upstairs. And she better have her
feet up." She gave the ceiling a scowl. "She'll probably
sneak down here fore the night's over. Can't keep her away from the
boss." "What's Rio's special tonight?" "Paella." Her eyes lit with
appreciation. She'd sampled some herself. "He's been driving
Nick crazy, making him shell shrimp." "You game for that?" Alex
asked Bess. "You bet." As Lola wandered
off, Bess propped her chin on her hands. "So, who's the boss,
who's Rio, and who's Nick?" "Zack's the boss." He
gestured toward the tall, broad-shouldered man working the bar.
"Rio's the cook, this Jamaican giant who'll fix you the best
meal this side of heaven. Nick's Zack's brother." Bess nodded. She liked to know the
players. "And Rachel's married to Zack." After a long study
of the man behind the bar, she smiled. "Impressive. How'd she
meet him?" "She was Nick's PD after I busted
him for attempted burglary." Bess didn't blink or look shocked, she
simply leaned a little closer. "What was he stealing?" Alex was vaguely disappointed that he
hadn't gotten a reaction. "Electronics—and doing a poor
job of it. He was tangled up with a gang at the time. This was about
a year and a half ago." Absently he toyed with the square-cut
aquamarine on her finger, watching it catch the light. "Nick had
some problems. Actually, he's Zack's stepbrother. Nick was still a
kid when Zack went off and joined the navy and his mother died.
Anyhow, when Zack came back a few years ago, his father was dying,
and the kid was chin-deep in trouble." "This is great." Bess beamed
up at Lola as their drinks were served. "Thanks." The smile did it. Lola sent Alex a look
of approval before she swung by the bar to report to Zack. "Don't stop now." Alex lifted his mug of beer. He knew
very well that Lola was giving Zack a sotto voce rundown of her
impressions and opinions of his choice of companion. "You want
to hear the whole thing?'' "Of course I do." Bess
sprinkled salt on her wrist, licked it, then tossed back the tequila
with all the flair of a Mexican bandit. While she sucked on the lime
wedge Lola had brought with the drink, she grinned at Zack. "I
like the zing." "How many times can you do that
and live?" "I haven't tested it that far."
The liquor left a nice trail of heat down her throat and into her
stomach. "I did ten once, but I was younger then, and stupid. So
keep going." She leaned forward again. "Zack came back
after sailing the seven seas and found his brother in trouble." "Well, Nick was tangled up with
the Cobras…" Alex began. By the time their paella was
served, he was enjoying himself. It always polished a man's ego to
have a woman's complete and fascinated attention. "So that's how
I ended up on the point of having an Irish-Ukrainian niece or
nephew." "Terrific. You've got a flair for
storytelling, Alexi. Must be some Gypsy blood in there." "Naturally." She smiled at him. All he needed was a
hoop of gold in one ear and a violin, she thought—but she was
sure he wouldn't want to hear it. "It doesn't hurt that you have
this wisp of an accent that peeks out now and then. Of course, your
material's first-rate, too. I'm a sucker for happy endings. I can't
have many of them in my field. Once we tie things up, we have to
unravel them again, or we lose the audience." "Why? I thought most people went
for the happy ending." "They do. But in soaps, a
character loses the edge if he or she isn't dealing with some crisis
or tragedy." She sampled the paella and sighed her satisfaction.
"That's why Elana's been married twice, had amnesia, was
sexually assaulted, had two miscarriages and a nervous breakdown,
went temporarily blind, shot a former lover in self-defense, overcame
a gambling addiction, had twins who were kidnapped by a psychotic
nurse—and recovered them only after a long, heartrending and
perilous search through the South American jungles." She took
another glorious bite. "Not necessarily in that order." Before Alex could ask who Elana was,
Lola was setting down fresh drinks. "You watch 'Secret Sins'?"
she asked Bess. "Religiously. You?" "Well, yeah." She shrugged,
knowing there were several patrons in the bar who'd rag her about it.
"I got hooked when I was in the hospital having my youngest.
He's ten now. That was back when Elana was a first-year resident at
Millbrook Memorial and in love with Jack Banner. He was a great
character." "One of the best," Bess
agreed. "Brooding and self-destructive." "I was really sorry when he died
in that warehouse fire. I didn't think Elana would ever get over it." "She's a tough lady," Bess
commented. "Had to be." When someone
called her, Lola waved to them to wait. "If it hadn't been for
her, Storm would never have gotten himself together and become the
man he is today." "You like Storm?" "Oh, man, who wouldn't?" With
a chuckle, Lola rolled her eyes. "The guy's every woman's
fantasy, you know? I'm really pulling for him and Jade. They deserve
some happiness, after everything they've been through. Jeez, all
right, Harry, I'm on my way. Enjoy your dinner," she said to
Bess, and hurried off. Bess turned to Alex with a smile. "You
look confused." He only shook his head. "You two
were talking about those characters as though they were real people." "But they are," Bess told
him, and scooped up some shrimp. "For an hour a day, five days a
week. Didn't you ever believe in Batman, or Sam Spade? Scarlett
O'Hara, Indiana Jones?" "It's fiction." "Good fiction creates its own
reality. That's entertainment." Picking up the saltshaker, she
grinned. "Come on, Alexi, even a cop needs to fantasize now and
then." He looked at her long enough to make
her pulse dance. "I do my share." Bess swallowed the tequila, but its
zing paled beside the one that Alex's quiet statement had streaking
through her. "You'll have to tell me about that sometime."
She glanced around at the sound of piano music. Against the far wall was a huge
upright. A slimly built, sandy-haired young man was caressing blues
out of the keys. "That's Nick," Alex told her. "Really?" Bess angled her
chair around for a better look. "He's very good." "Yeah. He talked Zack into putting
a piano in the bar about a year ago. Rachel and Muldoon tried to get
him to go back to school, get more training, but no dice." "Some things can't be taught,"
Bess murmured. "Looks like. Anyway, he still
works in the kitchen with Rio, and comes out and plays when the mood
strikes." "And has every female in the joint
mooning over him." "He's just a kid," Alex said
quickly—too quickly. With her tongue in her cheek, Bess
turned back. "Younger men have their own appeal
to the experienced woman. In fact, right now Jessica is embroiled in
a passionate affair with Tod—who's ten years her junior. The
mail is running five to one in favor." "We were talking about you." She only smiled. "Were we?" Zack walked over to slap Alex on the
back. "How's the meal?" "It's terrific." Bess held
out a hand. "You're Zack? I'm Bess." "Nice to see you." Zack kept
a hand on Alex's shoulder after giving Bess's a quick squeeze. "You
must be the Bess Rachel ran into down at the station." "I must be. You have a great place
here. Now that I've found it, I'll be back." "That's what we like to hear."
His blue eyes sparkled with friendly curiosity. "Alex doesn't
bring his ladies around very often. He likes to keep us guessing." She couldn't help but respond to the
humor in Zack's eyes. "Is that so?" "Ease off, Muldoon," Alex
muttered. "He's still sore at me for
stealing his baby sister." Alex sent him an arched look. "I
just figured she had better taste." He lifted his beer.
"Speaking of which." He gestured with the mug. Bess saw Zack's eyes change and,
recognizing love, her heart sighed. It didn't surprise her-when
Rachel came to the table. "What's this?" Rachel
demanded. "A party, and nobody invited me?" "Sit," Zack and Alex said in
unison. "I'm tired of sitting."
Ignoring them both, she turned to Bess. "Nice to see you again."
She took a deep, appreciative sniff. "Rio's paella. Incredible,
isn't it?" "Yes, it is. Alex was just telling
me how the two of you met." "Oh?" Rachel's brow lifted. "Why don't you join us and give me
your side of it?" Twenty minutes later, Alex was forced
to admit that Bess's casual friendliness had gotten Rachel to sit
down and relax in a way neither he nor Zack would have been able to
with their demanding concern. For a woman who was so full of energy
and verve, she had a knack for putting people at ease, he noted. A gift for listening to details and
asking just the right question. And for entertaining, he
mused—effortlessly. It didn't surprise him that she was
able to talk music with Nick when he was called over to join them, or
food with Rio when she asked to go back into the kitchen to
compliment him on the meal. He wasn't surprised when she and Rachel
made a date to meet for lunch the following week. "I like your family," Bess
stated as they settled into a cab. "You've only met a fraction of
it." "Well, I like the one's I've met.
How much more do you have?" "My parents. Another sister, her
husband, their three kids. A brother, his wife, and their kid. What
about you?" "Hmm?" "Family." "Oh. I was an only child. Do they
all live in New York?" "All but Natasha." He toyed
with the curls at the nape of her neck. "You don't talk about
yourself." "Are you kidding?" She
laughed, though she wanted to curl like a cat into the fingers
brushing her skin. "I never stop talking." "You ask questions. You talk about
things, other people, your characters. But you don't talk about
Bess." She should have known a cop would
notice what most people didn't. "We haven't had that many
conversations," she pointed out. When she turned her head, her
mouth was close to his. She wanted to kiss him, Bess thought. It
wasn't merely to distract him. After all, she had nothing to hide.
But she didn't speak, only moved her lips to his. The fingers at the back of her neck
tensed as he changed the angle of the kiss and the mood of it. It was
light and friendly only for an instant. Then it darkened, deepened,
lengthened. Mixed with the taste, the texture, were hints of what was
to come. There's a storm brewing, Bess thought
dizzily. And, oh, she'd never been able to resist a storm. Her heart was knocking by the time his
lips moved to her temple. "You know how to change the subject,
McNee." "What subject?" His hand slid to her throat, cupped
there. He felt the pigeon beat of her rapid pulse. The rhythm of it
was as seductive as jungle drums. "You. Now I'm only more
curious." "There's not that much to tell."
Uneasy and confused by the sensation, she drew back as the cab pulled
to the curb. "Looks like we're here." She slid across the
seat while Alex paid the driver. Her knees were a little weak, she
realized. Another first. Alexi Stanislaski was going to require some
thought. "You don't have to walk me up." she said,
surprised that it unnerved her to see the cab pull away and leave the
two of them alone on the shadowy sidewalk. "Which means you're not going to
ask me in." "No." She smiled a little,
running her fingers up and down the strap of her bag. But she wanted
to. It was amazing to her just how much she wanted to. "I think
it would be smarter if I didn't." He accepted that, because the choice
had to be hers. And the prospect of changing her mind along the way
was tremendously appealing. "We'll do this again." "Yes." He closed a hand over her restless one,
brought it to his lips. "Soon." She felt something, a small, vague ache
centered in her heart. Confused by it, she slipped her hand away.
"All right. Soon. Good night." "Hold it." Before she could
turn away, he took her face in his hands, held it there for a moment
before lowering his mouth to hers. The pressure was whisper-light,
persuasive, invasive. Even as she responded, the kiss had that odd
ache spreading. Helpless, she brought her hands to his wrists,
clinging to them for balance. Though his mouth remained beautifully
gentle, the pulse she felt beneath her fingers raced in time with her
own. Then he let her go, stepped back. His
eyes stared into hers. "Good night," he said. She managed a nod before hurrying
inside. There was something about Bess, Alex
thought as he waited patiently for the light in her apartment to come
on. Something. He'd just have to find out what it was.
Chapter 5
Contents - Prev/Next The last person Bess expected to see
when she left her office a few days later was Rosalie. Even in the
bustling crowds of midtown, the woman stood out. After a moment of
blank surprise, Bess smiled and crossed the sidewalk. "Hi. Were you waiting for me?" "Yeah." "You should have come in."
Bess adjusted the weight of her bag and briefcase. "I figured it would be better for
you if I waited out here." "Don't be silly…" Her
words trailed off as she tried to see through and around Rosalie's
huge tinted glasses. Those sunburst colors around the left eye
weren't all cosmetics. Bess's friendly smile faded. "What
happened to you?" Rosalie shrugged. "Bobby. He was a
little ticked off about the other night." "That's despicable." "I've had worse." "Bastard." She said it
between her teeth, but overlying her fury was a terrible sense of
guilt. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. It was my fault." "Ain't nobody's fault, girlfriend.
Just the way things are." "It's not the way they should be.
And if I hadn't…" She let that go, knowing you could only
go back and change things in scripts. "Do you want to go to the
police? I'll go with you. We could—" "Hell, no." Rosalie let out
what passed for a laugh. "I'd get a lot worse than a sore eye if
I tried that. And if you think there's a cop alive who gives a damn
about a hooker with a black eye, you are as dumb as you look." Alex would care, Bess thought. She
refused to believe otherwise. "We'll do whatever you want." Rosalie pulled out a cigarette, cocking
her hip as she lit it. "Listen, you said you'd pay me to talk. I
figure I can use the extra money. And I'm on my own time." "All right." Ideas were
beginning to stir. "How much do you average a night?" As a matter of course, Rosalie started
to inflate it, but found the lie stuck in her throat. "After
Bobby takes his cut, about seventy-five. Maybe a hundred. Business
isn't as good as it used to be." "We'll talk." Distracted,
Bess searched for a cab. "We'll never get a taxi at this hour,"
she mumbled. "I live uptown about twenty blocks. Do you mind
walking?" This time Rosalie laughed full and
long. "Girl, walking the streets comes natural to me." Once they reached Bess's apartment,
Rosalie tipped down her shaded glasses and whistled. Unable to
resist, she walked to one of the wide windows. She could see a swatch
of the East River through other buildings. The sound of traffic was
so muted, it was almost musical. A far cry from the clatter and roar
she lived with every day. "My, oh, my, you do live high." "How about dinner?"
Automatically Bess stepped out of her shoes. "We'll order in."
Red meat, Bess thought. At the moment, she could have eaten it raw.
"Sit down, I'll get us some wine." Wine, Rosalie thought as she stretched
out on the plump cushions of the pit. She figured that sounded just
dandy. "You pay for all this just writing stuff?" "Mostly." On impulse, Bess
chose one of the best bottles in her wine rack. "You're not a
vegetarian, are you?" Rosalie snorted. "Get real." "Good. I want a steak." After
handing Rosalie a glass, she picked up the phone to order dinner. "I can't pay for that." "I'm buying," Bess assured
her, and curled up on the couch. "I need a consultant, Rosalie."
It was a risk, but so was breathing, she decided. "I'll give you
five hundred a week." Rosalie choked on the wine. "Five
hundred, just to tell you about turning tricks?" "No. I want more. I want why. I
want you to tell me about the other women. What draws them in. What
you're afraid of, what you're not. When I ask you a question, I'll
want an answer." Her voice was brisk now, all business. "I'll
know if you lie." Rosalie's eyes were shrewd and steady.
"You need all that for a TV show?" "You'd be surprised." It had
gone well beyond the show. The bruise on Rosalie's face grated on
her. She had caused it, Bess reflected. She would find a way to fix
it. "I'm buying a lot of your time for five hundred a week,
Rosalie. You might want to take a little vacation from Bobby." "What I do after I talk to you is
for me to say." "Absolutely. But if you decided
you wanted to take a break from the streets, and if you needed a
place to stay while you did, I could help you." . "Why?" Bess smiled. "Why not? It wouldn't
cost me any more." Intrigued, Rosalie considered. "I'll
think about it." "Fine. We can get started right
away." She rose to gather up pads, pencils, her tape recorder.
"Remember, this is daytime TV, and we can only do so much. I'll
have to filter down a great deal of what you tell me. Why don't I
fill you in on the story line?" Rosalie merely shrugged. "It's
your nickel." "Yes, it is." She settled
down again, and was weaving the complex and overlapping relationships
of Millbrook—to Rosalie's confusion and fascination—when
she heard the buzzer for her private elevator. Still talking, she
walked over to release the security lock. "So, anyway, the Josie
personality is dynamically opposed to Jade. The stronger she gets,
the more confused and frightened Jade becomes. She doesn't remember
where she's been when Josie comes out. And the lapses are getting
longer." "Sounds like the lady needs a
shrink." "Actually, she'll go to
Elana—she's a psychiatrist—but that's down the road a
bit. And under hypnosis—Ah, here's the food." At the
elevator's ding, Bess opened the door. The smile froze on her face. "Alexi." "Don't you bother to ask who it is
before you let someone come up?" He shook his head before he
caught her chin in his hand and kissed her. "Yes—that is, not when I'm
expecting someone. What are you doing here?" "Kissing you?" And, at that
moment, she wasn't as responsive as he'd come to expect. Then it
occurred to him that she'd said she was expecting someone. A man? A
date? A lover? His eyes cooled as he stepped back. "I guess I
should have called first." "No. I mean, yes. That is…
are you off tonight?" "I go back on in a couple hours." "Oh. Well." The buzzer
sounded again. "You could always tell him I'm the
plumber." Baffled, she stepped back inside to
release the elevator. "Tell who what?" "The guy on his way up." "Why should I tell the delivery
boy you're a plumber?" "Delivery boy?" A sound
inside the apartment had him edging closer. He wasn't jealous, damn
it, he was just curious. "I guess you've already got company,"
he began, and pushed the door wider. "Actually, I do." Giving up,
Bess gestured him inside. "We were just about to have some
dinner." He looked over at the couch just as
Rosalie stood. Caught between them, Bess felt herself battered by
double waves of hostility. "What the hell is she doing here?" "You called the cops,"
Rosalie said accusingly before Bess could answer. "You called
the damn cops." "No. No, I didn't." Rosalie was already striding across the
room. Bess knew that if the woman made it to the door she would have
lost her chance. "Rosalie." She grabbed her arm. "I
didn't call him." "And why the hell didn't you?"
Alex tossed back. "Because it's none of your
business." Still gripping Rosalie, Bess swirled on him. "This
is my home, and she's my guest." "And you're a bigger idiot than I
thought." Sizing up the situation, Rosalie
relaxed fractionally. "You two got a thing?" "Yes," Alex shot back. "No," Bess snapped, then
sighed. "Something in between the two," she mumbled. She
snatched her wallet out of her bag as she heard the elevator ding.
"Excuse me. That's dinner." While she herded the delivery boy
inside to set up the meal, Alex and Rosalie stood eyeing each other
with mutual dislike and suspicion. "What's the game, Rosalie?" "No game." She flashed a
smile that was as feral as a shark's. "I'm a paid consultant.
Your lady hired me." "The hell with that." He
paused a moment, studying her bruised eye. "Bobby do that?" Rosalie angled her chin. "I walked
into a door." "Sure you did." He did care.
Bess might have been surprised at how much he cared. Rosalie
certainly would have been stunned. But he also knew there were things
that couldn't be fixed. "You'll want to watch your step." "I don't make the same mistake
twice." He turned away from her, his hands
balled into fists in his pockets. "McNee, I want to talk to
you." "Oh, just shut up." She
didn't bother to look up as she counted out bills. "Can't you
see I'm trying to figure the tip? There you go." "Thanks, lady." The delivery
boy tucked the bills away. "Enjoy your dinner." "There's enough for three,"
Bess stated, turning toward Alex. "But you're not going to stay
if you're rude." "Rude?" The single word
bounced off her ceiling. He was beside her in two strides. "You
think it's rude for me to ask you if you've lost your mind when I
walk in and find you've invited a hooker to dinner?" Her eyes narrowed. "Out." "Damn it, Bess…" "I said out." She gave him a
hefty shove toward the door. "We went on one date," she
reminded him. "One. Maybe I entertained the idea of something
more, but that gives you no right to come into my house and tell me
what to do and who to talk with." He grabbed her hand before she could
push him again. "One has nothing to do with the other." "You're right. Absolutely right.
What I should have said is that I run my life, Detective." She
snatched her hand away so that she could poke a finger at his chest.
"Me. Alone. Get the picture?" "Yeah." He wondered how she'd
like a nice clip on that pointy little chin of hers. "I've got a
picture for you." He hauled her up and kissed her hard. No
gentle touch, no finesse. All steam heat. It lasted only seconds, but
he succeeded in shocking her speechless. "Things change, McNee."
Dark, furious eyes pinned her to the spot. "Get used to it." With that, he stormed out, slamming the
door behind him. "Well." Bess took one breath,
then another. Her throat felt scalded. "Of all the incredible
nerve. Who the hell does he think he is, marching in here that way?"
Hands on her hips, she spun to face Rosalie. "Did you see that?" "Hard to miss it." Grinning,
Rosalie snatched a french fry from a plate. "If he thinks he's getting away
with that—that attitude—he's very much mistaken." "Man's nuts about you." "Excuse me?" "Girl, that was one lovesick
puppy." Bess snatched up her wine and gulped.
"Don't be ridiculous. He was just showing off." "Uh-huh. If I had me a man who
looked at me like that, I'd do one of two things." "Which are?" "I'd either sit back and enjoy, or
I'd run for my life." Frowning, Bess sat down and picked up
her fork. "I don't like to be pushed." "Seems to me it depends on who's
doing the pushing." She sat, as well, and dug right into her
steak. "He sure is one fine-looking man—for a cop." Bess stabbed at her salad. "I
don't want to talk about him." "You're paying the tab,"
Rosalie said agreeably. With a grunt of assent, Bess tried to eat.
Damn cop, she thought. He'd ruined her appetite. There was something to be said for
beating the hell out of inanimate objects. Alex had always found the
therapy of a pair of boxing gloves and a punching bag immeasurably
rewarding. With those so easily accessible, he could never figure out
why so many people felt the need for a psychiatrist's couch. Until recently. Twenty minutes of sweating and pounding
hadn't relieved his basic frustration. He often used the gym—in
the middle of a difficult case, when one went wrong, when a good
arrest turned sour in court. The same ingredients had worked equally
well for him whenever he'd fought with family, or friends, or had
female problems. Not this time. Whatever hold Bess McNee had on him,
Alex couldn't seem to punch himself out of it "So much energy, so early." The familiar voice had Alex blinking
away the sweat that had dripped through his headband into his eyes.
His brother Mikhail, and Alex's ten-month-old nephew, Griff, were
standing hand in hand, grinning identical grins. "Got your papa out early, did you,
tough guy?" Alex swung Griff up for a smacking kiss. Griff babbled out happily. The only
word Alex could decipher in the odd foreign language of a toddler was
Mama. "Sydney's tired," Mikhail
explained. "She has some wheeling and dealing keeping her up at
night. This one's an early riser." He ruffled his son's hair.
"So I thought we'd come down and lift weights. Right?" Griff grinned and cocked his elbows.
"Papa." "Your muscle's bigger," Alex
assured him. "Hey, it's the Griff-man!"
Rocky, the former lightweight who ran the gym, gave a whistle and
held out his wiry arms. "Come see me, champ." With a squeal of pleasure, Griff
wiggled out of Alex's arms to toddle off on his almost steady legs.
"Better watch out, Rock," Mikhail called out. "He's
slippery." "I can handle him." With the
confidence of a four-time grandfather, he hefted Griff. "We got
things to do," he told Mikhail. "Why don't you talk to your
brother there and find out why this is the third time this week he's
come in to pound on my equipment?" "Nosy," Alex muttered. "He's
worse than an old woman." Mikhail tilted a brow when Alex went
back to pounding the bag. "Speaking of women…" "We weren't." "Why do men come to such places as
this unless it's to talk of women?" The music of the Ukraine
flavored Mikhail's voice. Alex wondered if his brother knew how much
he sounded like their father. "To hit things," he retorted.
"To talk dirty and to sweat." "That, too. So, it is a woman,
yes?" "It's always a damn woman,"
Alex said between gritted teeth. "This one's named Bess." Alex's punch stopped in midswing.
Turning, he used his forearm to swipe his brow. "How do you know
about Bess?" "Rachel tells me." Pleased,
Mikhail grinned. "She also tells me that this Bess is not
beautiful so much as unique," and that she's smart. This isn't
your usual type, Alexi." "She's nobody's type." Alex
turned back to the bag, feinted with his right, then jabbed with his
left. "Unique," he said with a snort. "That's her, all
right. Her face. It was like God was distracted that day and mixed up
the features for five different women. Her eyes are too big, her
chin's pointed, her nose is crooked." His gloved fist plowed
into the bag. "And she has skin like an angel. I touch it and my
mouth waters." "Mmm… I'll have to get a
look at this one." "I've sworn off," Alex told
him between grunts. "I don't need the aggravation. She doesn't
have all her circuits working at the same time. Maybe Rachel thinks
she's smart because she went to college." "Radcliffe," Mikhail
supplied. "She had lunch with Rachel, and Rachel asked." "Radcliffe?" Letting out a
breath, Alex leaned against the bag. "It figures." "She also told Rachel that the two
of you had a… misunderstanding." "I understood perfectly. Look,
maybe she went to some fancy college, but you couldn't fill up a
teaspoon with her common sense. I don't need to get involved with
someone that flaky." Mikhail's bark of laughter echoed
through the gym. "This from a man who once dated Miss Lug
Wrench." "It was Miss Carburetor." "Ah, that's different." A smile twitched, and Alex punched
halfheartedly at the bag. Working up a sweat hadn't relaxed him, but
five minutes with Mikhail was doing the job. "Anyway, we're
finished before we got started. And both better off." "Undoubtedly you're right." "I know I'm right. We'd always be
coming at things from different angles. Hers is cross-eyed. She
doesn't see anything the way she should." "A difficult woman." "Difficult." Alex held out
his hands so that Mikhail could unlace his gloves. "That doesn't
begin to describe her. She acts so mild and relaxed, you wouldn't
think you could rile her with a cattle prod. Then you point out an
obvious mistake, for her own good, and she jumps on you with both
feet. Kicks you out of the house." Mikhail tucked his tongue in his cheek.
"You're better off without her." "You're telling me." Alex
tossed his gloves aside and flexed his hands. "Who needs
unreasonable women?" "Men." "Yeah." With a sigh, Alex
sent his brother a miserable look. "I want her so much I can't
breathe." "I know the feeling." He
punched his brother's sweaty shoulder. "So go get her." "Go get her," Alex repeated. "Put her in her place." A dangerous light, one Mikhail
recognized, flickered in Alex's eyes. "Her place. Right." "Hey!" Mikhail called out
when his brother strode off. "The showers are that way." "I'll catch one at the station.
See you later." "Later," Mikhail agreed. He
wandered off to find his son, wondering how soon he would meet this
unique, unreasonable woman without common sense. She sounded perfect for his baby
brother. Bess was never at her best in the
morning, and she suspected anyone who was. Her alarm was buzzing when
she heard the pounding on her door. She'd been ignoring the first for
nearly ten minutes, but the incessant knocking had her dragging
herself out of bed. Bleary-eyed, pulling a skimpy silk robe
over an equally skimpy nightshirt, she stumbled to the door. "What
the hell?" she demanded. "Is it a fire or what?" "Or what," Alex told her when
she yanked open the door. Struggling to focus, she dragged a hand
through her hair. The robe drooped off one shoulder. "How'd you
get up here?" "Flashed my badge for the security
guard." After closing the door behind him, he looked his fill.
There was a great deal to be said for a sleepy woman in rumpled white
silk. "Get you up, McNee?" "What time is it?" She turned
away, following the scent from her coffeemaker, which was set to brew
at 7:20 each morning. "What day is it?" "Thursday." He followed her
weaving progress through the living area and into a big
white-and-navy kitchen. There was a huge arrangement of fresh orchids
on the center island. Orchids in the kitchen, he thought. Only Bess.
"About 7:30." "In the morning?" Blindly she
groped for a mug. "What are you doing here at 7:30 on a Thursday
morning?" "This." He spun her around.
The taste of her mouth, warm and soft from sleep, had him groaning.
Before she could think—he didn't want either of them to
think—he slipped his tongue between her lips to seduce hers.
Her body went stiff, then melted, softening against his like candle
wax touched by a flame. Through the roaring of his blood, he
heard the crash as the china mug she'd held slipped from her fingers
and smashed on the tiles. Was she still dreaming? Bess wondered.
Her dreams had always been very vivid, but this… It wouldn't
be possible to feel so much, need so desperately, in a dream. And she could taste him. Really taste
him. A mingling of man and desire and salty sweat. Delicious. His
mouth was so hot, so unyielding, just as his hands were through the
thin silk she wore. She could feel the cool tiles beneath
her feet, a shivery contrast to the heat roaring around her. Under
her palms, his cheeks were rough, arousingly rough. And she heard her
own voice, a muffled, confused sound, as she tried to say his name. "I have to wake up," she
managed when his mouth left hers to cruise over her throat. "I
really have to." "You are awake." He had to
touch her—just once. However unfair his advantage, he had to.
So he cupped her breasts in his hands, molding their firmness through
the silk, brushing his thumbs, feather-light, over straining nipples.
"See?" She'd never been the swooning type, but
she was afraid this would be a first. "I have to—"
She gasped, for as she'd started to step back, he'd swept her up into
his arms. A skitter of panic, completely unfamiliar, raced down her
spine. "Alexi, don't." He covered her mouth again, felt her
trembling surrender. And knew he could. And could not. "Your
feet are bare," he said, and set her on the counter. "I
made you drop your cup." Shaken, she stared down at the shards
of broken crockery. "Oh." "You have a broom?" "A broom." She-was awake now,
wide-awake. But her mind was still mush. "Somewhere. Why?" He was making her stupid, he realized,
and grinned. "So I can clean it up before you cut yourself. Stay
there." He walked to a likely-looking closet and located a
dustpan and broom. Because he was a man whose mother had trained him
well in such matters, he went about the sweeping job quickly and
competently. "So, have you missed me?" "I haven't given you a thought."
She blew the hair out of her eyes. "Hardly." "Me either." He dumped the
shards into the trash, replaced the broom and dustpan. "How
about some coffee?" "Sure." Maybe that would help
her regain her normal composure. As he poured, she caught a whiff of
him over the homey morning aroma. "You smell like a locker
room." "Sorry. I was at the gym."
When he handed her the coffee, she sat where she was and sipped. Half
a cup later, she was able to take her first clear-eyed look at him. He looked fabulous. Rough and sweaty
and ready for action. The thick tangle of hair was falling over a
faded gray sweatband. His face was unshaven, his NYPD T-shirt was
ripped and darkened in a vee down the chest, his sweatpants were
loose and frayed at the cuffs. When she lifted her gaze back to his,
he smiled. "Good morning, McNee." "Good morning." He skimmed a finger over her thigh. She
was sensitive there, he noted. He could tell by the way her eyes
darkened and the pulse in her throat picked up the beat. "I'm
not apologizing this time." "You should be." "No. I'm right about this."
He put a finger over her lips before she could speak. "Trust me.
I'm a cop." He could have all but seduced her in
her own kitchen before her eyes were even open, but she had a point
to make. Closing a hand over his wrist, she drew his hand away. "My
personal decisions, whether they have to do with my professional or
my private life, are just that. Personal. I've been making those
decisions, right or wrong, for a long time. I don't intend to stop
now." "I'm not going to see you hurt." "That's very sweet, Alexi."
Softening a bit, she brushed a hand through his hair. "I don't
intend to be hurt." "You don't know what you're
dealing with. Oh, you think you do," he continued, recognizing
the look in her eyes. "But all you know is the surface. There
are things that go on in the streets, every day, every night, that
you have no conception of. You never will." She couldn't argue, not with what she
saw in his face. "Maybe not. I don't see what you see, or know
what you know. Maybe I don't want to. My friendship with Rosalie—" "Friendship?" "Yes." The expression on her
face dared him to contradict her. "I feel something for
her—about her." With a helpless gesture, Bess set her cup
aside. "I can't possibly explain it to you, Alexi. You're not a
woman. I can help her. Don't tell me it's a fairy tale to believe I
can save her from the streets and what she's chosen to be. I've
gotten that advice already." "From someone with at least half a
brain," he surmised. "I had no idea this had gotten so out
of hand. You said you wanted to talk to her for background stuff for
your story." "That's true enough." But
Bess remembered the bruise on Rosalie's face too well. "Is it so
impossible that I might be able to make a difference in her life? Has
being a cop made you so hard you aren't willing to give someone a
chance to change?" He gripped her hands, hard. "This
isn't about me." "No," she said, and smiled.
"It's not." He swore and let go of her to pace to
the coffee maker. "Okay, point taken. It's none of my business.
But I'm going to ask for a promise." "You can ask." "Don't go out on the streets with
her. Don't go anywhere near Bobby's territory." She thought of the man with the silver
hair and the vicious eyes. "That I can promise. Feel better?" "I'm not through. Don't let her up
here unless you're sure she's alone. Meet her down at your office, or
in some public place." "Really, Alexi…" "Please." She said nothing for a moment, and
then, because she could see how much it had cost him to use that
word, she relented. "All right." Bess scooted away from the
counter, then opened the bread drawer. "Want a bagel?" "Sure." She popped two into the toaster oven
before going to the refrigerator for cream cheese. "There's
something I should tell you." "I'm hoping there's a lot of
things." With a puzzled smile, she turned back.
"I'm sorry?" "I want to know about this
personal life of yours, McNee. I want to know all about you, then I
want to take you to bed and make love with you until we both forget
our own names." "Ah…" It didn't seem
to take more than one of those long, level looks of his to make her
forget a great deal more than her name. "Anyway…" "Anyway?" he repeated
helpfully as the toaster oven dinged. "I was going to tell you about
Angie Horowitz." The lazy smile vanished. His eyes went
cool and flat. "What do you know about her?" "Boy, it really does click off,"
Bess murmured. "I feel like I just stepped into one of those
rooms with the two-way mirror and the rubber hoses." "Angie Horowitz," he
repeated. "What do you know about her?" "I don't know much of anything,
but I thought I should tell you what Rosalie told me." She got
out plates, then began to spread the bagels generously. "She
said that Angie was really happy to have hooked up with this one guy.
He'd hired her a couple of times and slipped her some extra money.
Treated her well, promised her some presents. In fact, he gave her
this little pendant. A gold heart with a crack down the center." Alex's face remained impassive. There
had been a broken neck chain wrapped in Angie's hand when they found
her, just as there had been with the first victim. That little detail
had been kept out of the press. There hadn't been a heart, he thought
now. But someone had broken the chain for a reason. "She wore it all the
time—according to Rosalie," Bess went on. "Rosalie
also told me Mary Rodell had one just like it. She was the other
victim, wasn't she?" she asked Alex. "She had it on the
last time Rosalie saw her alive." "Is that it?" Bess was disappointed that he wasn't
more pleased with the information. "There's a little more."
Sulking a bit, she bit into her bagel. "Angie called the guy
Jack, and she bragged to Rosalie that he was a real gentleman, and
was built like…" She trailed off, cleared her throat, but
her eyes were bright with humor, rather than embarrassment. "Women
have colorful terms for certain things, just like men." "I get the picture." "He had a scar." "What kind?" "I don't know. A scar, on his hip.
Angie told Rosalie he got upset when she asked him about it. That's
all she told me, Alexi, but I figured the coincidence of the
pendants, you might want to know about this guy." "It never hurts." He gave her
an easy smile, though his instincts were humming. "Probably
nothing, but I'll look into it." He tugged on her hair. "Do
yourself a favor, and don't tell Rosalie you passed this along to
me." "I'm softhearted, Detective. Not
softheaded. She thinks you have a really nice butt—but you're
still a cop." He grimaced. "I don't think I like
you discussing my anatomy with a—" "Friend," she supplied, with
a warning lift of her brow. "I also had lunch with your sister.
We discussed your nasty temperament." "I heard." He stole her
bagel. "Radcliffe, huh?" "So?" "So nothing. Want to go dancing
with me?" She debated with herself for almost a
full second. "Okay. Tonight?" "Can't. Tomorrow?" It meant canceling dinner at Le Cirque
with L. D. Strater. That debate took nearly half a second. "That's
fine. Sexy or sedate?" "Sexy. Definitely." "Good. Why don't you come by
around—" She glanced at the clock, stared, then yelped.
"Damn it! Now I'm going to be late. I'll owe Lori twenty dollars
if I'm late one more time this month." She began pushing Alex
out of the kitchen. "It's all your fault. Now beat it, so I can
throw on some clothes and get out of here." "Since you're already late…"
He had some very good moves. Even as she shoved him toward the door,
he was turning to catch her close. "I can arrange it so you're a
lot later." "Smooth talker," she said
with a laugh. "Take a hike." "You've already lost twenty. I'm
just offering to make it worth your while." "I don't know how I can resist
that incredibly romantic gesture, but somehow I find I have the
strength." "You want romance?" There was
a gleam in his eyes as he headed for the door. "Tomorrow night.
We'll just see how strong you are."
Chapter 6
Contents - Prev/Next After spending most of the morning
kicking his heels in , court, waiting to testify in an assault case,
Alex returned to the station to find his partner hip-deep in
paperwork. "The boss wants to see you," Judd said through a
mouthful of chocolate bar. "Right." Alex shrugged out of
his jacket and dragged off his court-appearance tie. With his free
hand, he picked up his pile of messages. "I think he meant now," Judd
said helpfully. "I got it." As he passed
Judd's desk, Alex peeked over his shoulder at the report in the
typewriter. "Two p's in apprehend, Einstein." Judd backspaced and scowled. "You
sure?" "Trust me." He swung through
the squad room and knocked on Captain Trilwaiter's glass door. "Come." Trilwalter glanced up. If Alex often
thought he was swamped in paperwork, it was nothing compared to what
surrounded his captain. Trilwalter's desk was heaped with it. The
overflowing files, stacks of reports and correspondence gave
Trilwalter a bookish, accountantlike look. This was enhanced by the
half glasses perched on his long, narrow nose, the slightly balding
head and the ruthlessly knotted knit tie. But Alex knew better. Trilwalter was a
cop down to the bone, and he might still be on the street but for the
bullet that had damaged his left lung. "You wanted to see me, Captain?" "Stanislaski." Trilwalter
crooked his finger, then pointed it, gesturing to Alex to come in and
shut the door. He leaned back in his chair, folded his hands over his
flat belly and scowled. "What the hell is all this about
soap operas?" "Sir?" "Soap operas," Trilwalter
repeated. "I just had a call from the mayor." Testing his ground, Alex nodded slowly.
"The mayor called you about soap operas?" "You look confused, Detective."
A rare, and not entirely humor-filled, smile curved Trilwaiter's
mouth. "That makes two of us. The name McNee mean anything to
you? Bess McNee?" Alex closed his eyes a moment. "Oh,
boy." "Rings a bell, does it?" "Yes, sir." Alex gave himself
a brief moment to contemplate murder. "Miss McNee and I have a
personal relationship. Sort of." "I'm not interested in your
personal relationship, sort of or otherwise. Unless they come across
my desk." "When I arrested her—" "Arrested her?" Trilwalter
held up one hand while he took off his glasses. Slowly, methodically,
he massaged the bridge of his nose. "I don't think I have to
know about that. No, I'm sure I don't." Despite himself, Alex began to see the
humor in it. "If I could say so, Captain, Bess tends to
bring that kind of reaction out in a man." "She's a writer?" "Yes, sir. For 'Secret Sins.'" Trilwalter lifted tired eyes. '"Secret
Sins.' Apparently the mayor is quite a fan. Not only a fan,
Detective, but an old chum of your Bess McNee's. Old chum was just
how he put it." Finding discretion in silence, Alex
said nothing as Trilwalter rose. The captain walked to the
watercooler wedged between two file cabinets in the corner of his
office. He poured out a paper cupful and drank it down. "His honor, the mayor, requests
that Miss McNee be permitted to observe a day in your life,
Detective." Alex made a comment normally reserved
for locker rooms and pool halls. Trilwalter nodded sagely. "My sentiments exactly. However,
one of the less appealing aspects of working this particular desk is
playing politics. You lose, Detective." "Captain, we're closing in on that
robbery on Lexington. I've got a new lead on the hooker murders and a
message on my desk from a snitch who could know something about that
stiff we found down on East Twenty-third. How am I supposed to work
with some ditzy woman hanging over my shoulder?" "This is the ditzy woman you have
a personal relationship with?" Alex opened his mouth, then closed it
again. How to explain Bess? "Sort of," he said at length.
"Look, Captain, I already agreed to talk to McNee about police
work, in general, now and again. I never agreed to specifics. I sure
as hell don't want her riding shotgun while I work." "A day in your life, Stanislaski."
With that same grim smile, Trilwalter crushed his cup and tossed it.
"Monday next, to be exact." "Captain—" "Deal with it," Trilwaiter
said. "And see that she stays out of trouble." Dismissed, Alex stalked back to his
desk. He was still muttering to himself when Judd wandered over with
two cups of coffee. "Problem?" "Women," Alex said. "Tell me about it." Because
he'd been waiting all mom-ing for the chance, Judd sat on the edge of
Alex's desk. "Speaking of women, did you know that Bess was
engaged to L. D. Strater?" Alex's head snapped up. "What?" "Used to be," Judd explained.
"One of the teachers at Holly's school's a real gossip-gatherer.
Reads all the tabloids and stuff. She was telling Holly how Strater
and Bess were a thing a few months ago." "Is that so?" Alex remembered
how they'd danced together at her party. Kissed. His mouth flattened
into a grim line as he lifted the cup. "A real whirlwind sort of
thing—according to my sources. Before that, she was engaged to
Charles Stutman." "Who the hell is that?" "You know, the writer. He's got
that hot play on Broadway now. Dust to Dust. Holly really wants to
see it. I thought maybe Bess could wangle some tickets." The sound Alex made was neither
agreement nor denial. It was more of a growl. "Then there was George
Collaway—you know, the son of that big publisher? That was
about three years ago, but he married someone else." "The lady gets around," Alex
said softly. "Yeah, and in top circles. And,
hey, Holly was really blown away when she found out that Bess was
Roger K. McNee's daughter. You know, the camera guy." "Camera guy?" Alex repeated,
feeling a hole spreading in the pit of his stomach. "As in
McNee-Holden?" "Yeah. First camera I ever bought
was a Holden 500. Use their film all the time, too. Hell, so does the
department. Well." He straightened. "If you get a chance,
maybe you could ask Bess about those tickets. It sure would mean a
lot to Holly." McNee-Holden. Alex ran the names over
in his head while the noise of the squad room buzzed around him. For
God's sake, he had one of their cameras himself. He'd bought their
little red packs of film hundreds of times over the years. The
department used their developing paper. He was pretty sure NASA did
too. Wasn't Bess just full of secrets! So she was rich. Filthy rich. He picked
up his messages again, telling himself it wasn't such a big deal.
Wouldn't have been, he corrected silently, if she'd told him about it
herself. Engaged, he thought with a frown. Three
times engaged. Shrugging, he picked up the phone. None of his
business, he reminded himself as he punched in numbers. If she'd been
married three times, it would be none of his business. He was taking
her dancing, not on a honeymoon. But it was a long time before he was
able to shuffle her into a back corner of his mind and get on with
his job. Sexy, the man had said, Bess
remembered, turning in front of her cheval glass. It looked as though
she were going to oblige him. Snug teal silk hugged every curve and
ended abruptly at midthigh. Over the strapless, unadorned bodice, she
wore a short, body jacket of fuchsia. Long, wand-shaped crystals
dangled at her ears. After stepping into her heels, she gave her hair
a last fluff. She felt like dancing. When her buzzer sounded, she grinned at
her reflection. Leave it to a cop to be right on time. Grabbing her
purse—a small one that bulged with what she considered the
essentials—she hurried to the intercom. "I'll come down. Hold on." She found him on the sidewalk, looking
perfect in gray slacks and a navy shirt. His hands were tucked in the
pockets of his bomber jacket. "Hi." She kissed him lightly,
then tucked an arm through his. "Where are we going?" It gave him a jolt, the way their eyes
and mouths lined up. As they would if they were in bed. "Downtown,"
he said shortly, and steered her left toward the corner to catch a
cab. . He couldn't have pleased her more with
his choice of the noisy, crowded club. The moment she stepped inside,
Bess's blood started to hum. The music was loud, the dancing in full
swing. They squeezed up to the bar to wait for a table. "Vodka, rocks," Alex ordered,
raising his voice over the din. "Two," Bess decided, and
smiled at him. "I think I was here before, a few months ago." "I wouldn't be surprised."
Not his business, Alex reminded himself. Her background, the men in
her life. None of it. The hell it wasn't. "It doesn't look like the kind of
place Strater would bring you." "L.D.?" Her eyes laughed.
"No, not his style." She angled herself around. "I
love to watch people dance, don't you? It's one of the few legal
forms of exhibitionism in this country." When he handed her her
drink, she murmured a thank-you. "Take that guy there." She
gestured with the glass at a man who was strutting on the floor,
thumbs in his belt loops, hips wiggling. "That's definitely one
of the standard urban white male mating dances." "Did you do a lot of dancing with
Stutman?" Alex heard himself ask. "Charlie?" She sampled the
vodka, pursed her lips. "Not really. He was more into sitting in
some smoky club listening to esoteric music that he could obsess to."
Still scanning the crowd, she caught the eye of a man in black
leather. He cocked a brow and started toward her. One hard look from
Alex, and he veered away. , Bess chuckled into her glass. "That
put him in his place." Rattling her ice, she grinned up at him.
"Were you born with that talent, or did you have to develop it?" Alex plucked the glass out of her hand
and set it aside. "Let's dance." Always willing to dance, Bess let him
pull her onto the floor. But instead of bopping to the beat, he
wrapped his arms around her. While legs flashed and arms waved around
them, and the music rocked, they glided. "Nice." Smiling into his
eyes, she linked her arms around his neck. "I see why you like
to make your own moves, Detective." "I believe I promised you
romance." He skimmed his lips over her jaw to her ear. "Yes." Her breath came out
slow and warm as she closed her eyes. "You did." "I'm not sure what a woman like
you considers romantic." Her skin shivered under his lips. "This
is a good start." "It's tough." He drew away so
that their lips were an inch apart. "It's tough for a cop to
compete with tycoons and playwrights." Her eyes were half-closed and dreamy
through her lashes. "What are you talking about?" "A couple of your former fiances." The lashes lifted fractionally. "What
about them?" "I wondered when you were going to
mention them. Or the fact that your father runs one of the biggest
conglomerates known to man. Or the little detail about your chum the
mayor calling my captain." They continued to dance as he spoke,
but Bess could see the anger building in his eyes. "Do you want
to take them as separate issues, or all in one piece?" She was a cool one, he thought. He was
feeling anything but cool. "Why don't we start with the mayor?
You had no right." "I didn't ask him to call, Alexi."
She spoke carefully, feeling the taut strength of his fingers at her
waist. "We were having dinner, and—" "You often have dinner with the
mayor?" "He's an old family friend,"
she said patiently. "I was telling him how helpful you'd been,
and one thing led to another. I didn't know he'd called your captain
until after it was done. I admit I liked the idea, and if it's caused
you any trouble, I'm sorry." "Great." "My work's as important to me as
yours is to you," she shot back, struggling with her own temper.
"If you'd prefer, I can arrange to spend Monday observing
another cop." "You'll spend Monday where I can
keep my eye on you." "Fine. Excuse me." She broke
away and worked her way through the crowd to the rest room. The music
pulsed against the walls as she paced the small room, ignoring the
charter from the two women freshening their lipstick at the mirror.
Losing her temper would be unproductive, she reminded herself.
Better, much better, to handle this situation calmly, coolly. When she was almost sure she could, she
walked back out. He was waiting for her. Taking her arm,
he led her to a table in the rear, where they could talk without
shouting. "I think we should go. There's no
use staying when you're so angry with me," she began, but he
merely scraped back her chair. "Sit." She sat. "When were you going to tell me
about your family?" "I don't see it as an issue."
And that was true enough. "Why should it be? This is only the
second time we've gone out." The look he sent her had her jiggling a
foot under the table. "You know damn well there's more going on
between us than a couple of dates." "All right, yes, I do." She
picked up her drink, then set it down again, untouched. "But
that's not the point. You're acting as though I deliberately hid
something from you, or lied. That's just not true." He picked up the fresh drink he'd
ordered. "So tell me now." "What? Didn't you run a make on
me?" His narrowed eyes gave her some small sense of
satisfaction. "Okay, Detective, I'll fill you in since you're so
interested. My family owns McNee-Holden, which, since its inception
in 1873, has expanded from still cameras and film to movies,
television, satellites, and all manner of things. Shall I have them
send you a prospectus?" "Don't get smart." "I'm just warming up." She
hooked an arm over the back of her chair. "My father heads the
company, and my mother entertains and does good works. I'm an only
child, who was born rather late in life to them. My father's name is
Roger, and he enjoys a racketing good game of polo. My mother's name
is Susan—never Sue or Susie—and she prefers a challenging
rubber of bridge. What else would you like to know?" Despite his temper, he wanted to take
her hand and soothe her. "Damn it, Bess, it isn't an
interrogation." "Isn't it? Let me make it easy for
you, Alexi. I was born in New York, spent the early part of my
childhood on our estate on Long Island, in the care of a very British
nanny I was extremely fond of, before going off to boarding school.
Which I detested. This, however, left my mother free to pursue her
many charitable causes, and my father free to pursue his business. We
are not close. From time to time we did travel together, but I was
not a pretty child, nor a tractable one, and my parents usually left
my care up to the servants." "Bess—" "I'm not finished." Her eyes
were hard and bright. "This isn't a poor-little-rich-girl story,
Alexi. I wasn't neglected or unhappy. Since I had no more in common
with my parents than they had with me, I was content to go my own
way. They don't interfere, and we get along very well. Because I
prefer making my own way, I don't trumpet the fact that I'm Roger K.
McNee's little girl. I don't hide it, either—otherwise, I would
have changed my name. It's simply a fact. Satisfied?" He took her hand before she could rise.
His voice was calm again, and too gentle to resist. "I wanted to
know who you are. I have feelings for you, so it matters." Slowly her hand relaxed under his. The
hard gleam faded from her eyes. "I understand that someone with
your background would feel that their family, who and what they came
from, are part of what they are. I don't feel that way about myself." "Where you come from means
something, Bess." "Where you are means more. What
does your father do?" "He's a carpenter." "Why aren't you a carpenter?" "Because it wasn't what I wanted."
He drummed his fingers on the table as he studied her. "Your
point," he acknowledged. "Look, I'm sorry I pushed. It was
just weird hearing all this from Judd." "From Judd?" "He got it from Holly, who got it
from some other teacher who reads the tabloids." Even as he said
it, it struck him as ridiculous. He grinned. "See?" Relaxed again, she
leaned forward. "Life really is a soap opera." "Yours is. Three ex-fiance's?" "That depends on how you count."
She took Alex's hand, because she liked the feel of it in hers. "I
wasn't engaged to L.D. He did give me a ring, and I didn't have the
heart to tell him it was ostentatious. But marriage wasn't
discussed." "One of the ten richest men in the
country gave you an ostentatious ring, but marriage wasn't
discussed?" "That's right. He's a very nice
man—a little pompous, sometimes, but who wouldn't be, with so
many people ready to grovel? Can we get some chips or something?" "Sure." He signaled to a
waitress. "So you didn't want to marry him." "I never thought about it."
Since he asked, she did so now. "No, I don't think I would have
liked it very much. He wouldn't have either. L.D. finds me amusing
and a little unconventional. Being a tycoon isn't all fun and games,
you know." "If you say so." She chuckled. "But he'd prefer a
different type for his next wife." She dived in immediately when
the waitress set baskets of chips and pretzels on the table. "I
enjoyed being in love with him for a few weeks, but it wasn't the
romance of the century." "What about the other one, the
writer?" "Charlie." There was a trace
of wistfulness now. "I was really stuck on Charlie. He has this
kind of glow about him. He's so interested in people, in emotions, in
motivations." She gestured with half a pretzel. "The thing
about Charlie is, he's good. Deep-down good. Entirely too good for
me." She finished off the pretzel. "See,
I do things like join Greenpeace. Charlie flies to Alaska to help
clean up oil spills. He's committed. That's why Gabrielle is perfect
for him." "Gabrielle?" "His wife. They met at a whale
rally. They've been married almost two years now." Alex was determined to get it right.
"You were engaged to a married man?'' "No." Insulted, she poked out
her lip. "Of course not. He got married after we were
engaged—that is, after we weren't engaged anymore. Charlie
would never cheat on Gabrielle. He's too decent." "Sorry. My mistake." He
considered changing the subject, but this one was just too
fascinating. "How about George? Was he between Charlie and
Strater?" "No, George was before Charlie and
after Troy. Practically in another life." "Troy? There was another one?" "Oh, you didn't know about him."
She propped her chin on her hand. "I guess your source didn't
dig back far enough. Troy was while I was in college, and we weren't
engaged for very long. Only a couple of weeks Hardly counts." Alex picked up his drink again.
"Hardly." "Anyway, George was a
mistake—though I'd never admit it to Lori. She gloats." "George was a mistake? The others
weren't?" She shook her head. "Learning
experiences. But George, well… I was a little rash with him. I
felt sorry for him, because he was always sure he was coming down
with some terminal illness, and he'd been in therapy since
kindergarten. We should never have gotten involved romantically. I
was really relieved when he decided to marry Nancy instead." "Is this like a hobby?" Alex
asked after a moment. "No, people plan hobbies. I never
plan to fall in love. It just happens." Her smile was amused and
tolerant. "It feels good, and when it's over, no one's hurt. It
isn't a sexual thing, like with Vicki. She goes from man to man
because of the sense of sexual power it gives her. I know most people
think if you have a relationship with a man—particularly if
you're engaged to him—you must be sleeping with him. But it's
not always true." "And if you're not engaged to
him?" Because the question demanded it, she
met his eyes levelly. "Every situation has its own rules. I
don't know what they are for this one yet." "Things may get serious." There was a slight pressure around her
heart. "That's always a possibility." "They're serious enough right now
for me to ask if you're seeing anyone else." She knew it was happening. Bess had
never been able to prevent that slow, painless slide into love. "Are
you asking me if I am, or are you asking me not to?" It wasn't painless for him. It was
terrifying. With what strength of will he had left, Alex held himself
on that thin, shaky edge. "I'm asking you not to. And I'm
telling you that I don't want anyone else. I can't even think of
anyone else." Her eyes were warm as she leaned over
to touch her lips to his. "There is no one else." He laid a hand on her cheek to keep her
mouth on his for another moment. Even as he kissed her, he wondered
how many other men had heard her say those same words. He told himself he was a jealous idiot.
With an effort, he managed to smother the feeling. Rising, he took
her hands and pulled her to her feet. "We're supposed to be dancing." "So I was told. Alexi."
Snuggling into love as she would have into a cozy robe, she cupped
his face in her hands. "What?" "I'm just looking. I want to make
sure you're not mad at me anymore." "I'm not mad at you." To
prove it, he kissed the tip of her crooked nose. No, not angry, she thought, searching
his eyes. But there was something else shadowed there. She couldn't
quite identify it. "My middle name's Louisa." With a half smile on his lips, he
tilted his head. "Okay." "I'm trying to think if there's
something else you might want to know that I haven't told you."
Needing to be close, she rested her cheek against his. "I really
don't have any secrets." He turned his face into her hair. God,
what was she doing to him to tie him up in knots like this? He pulled
her against him, wrapping his arms tight around her. "I know all
I need to know," he said quietly. "We're going to have to
figure out those rules, Bess. We're going to have to figure them out
fast." "Okay." She wasn't sure what
was holding her back. It would have been so easy to hurry out of the
club with him, to go home and be with him. Her body was straining for
him. And yet… The first tremor of panic shocked her
enough to have her pull back and smile, too brightly. She wasn't
afraid, she assured herself. And she didn't need to overanalyze. When
the time was right to move forward, she'd know it. That was all. "Come on, Detective." Still
smiling, she pulled him away from the table. "Let's see if you
can keep up with me on the dance floor."
Chapter 7
Contents - Prev/Next Alex read over a particularly grisly
autopsy report on half of a suspected murder-suicide, and tried to
ignore the fact that Bess was sitting in a chair to his right,
scribbling in her notebook. She was as good as her word, he was
forced to admit. Though she did tend to mumble to herself now and
again, she was quiet, unobtrusive, and once she'd realized he
wouldn't answer her questions—much less acknowledge her
presence—she'd directed them to Judd. He couldn't say she was a problem. But,
of course, she was a problem. She was there. And because she was
there, he thought about her. She'd even dressed quietly, in
bone-colored slacks and a navy blazer. As if, he thought, the
conservative clothes would help her fade into the background and make
him forget she was bothering him. Fat chance, when he was aware of
her in every cell. He could smell her, couldn't he? he
thought, seething with resentment. That fresh and seductive scent had
been floating at the edges of his senses all morning. Sneaking into
his brain the way a good second-story man sneaks through a window. And he could sense her, too. He didn't
need a cop's instincts to know she was behind him, to picture those
big green eyes drawing a bead on his every move. To imagine those
never-still hands making notes, or that soft, agile mouth curving
when a fresh idea came to her. She could have dressed in cardboard and
made him needy. He was so damn cute, Bess was thinking,
smiling at the back of his head. She enjoyed watching him work—the
way he scooped his hand through all that gorgeous black hair when he
was trying to think. Or shifted the phone from one ear to the other
so that he could take notes. The sound of his voice, clipped and
no-nonsense or sly and persuasive, depending on what he wanted from
the listener. And she particularly enjoyed the way he
moved his shoulders, restlessly, annoyance in every muscle, when he
became too aware of her presence. She had a terrific urge to press a kiss
to the back of his neck—and to see what he was reading. After a couple of scowls from him, she
scooted her chair back and stopped peeking over his shoulder. She was cooperating fully, Alex was
forced to admit. Which only made it worse. He wanted her to go away.
How could he explain that it was impossible for him to concentrate on
his job when the woman he was falling in love with was watching him
read an autopsy report? "Here you go." Bess gave him
a cup of coffee and a friendly smile. "You look like you could
use it." "Thanks." Cream, no sugar, he
noted as he sipped. She'd remembered. Was that part of her appeal? he
wondered. The fact that she absorbed those little details about
people? "You must be getting bored." Taking a chance, she sat on the edge of
his desk. "Why?" "Nothing much going on." He
gestured to indicate the pile of paperwork. Maybe, just maybe, he
could convince her she was wasting her time. "If you have your
TV cop doing this, it isn't going to up your ratings." "We'll want to show different
aspects of his work." She broke a candy bar in half and offered
Alex a share. "Like the fact that he'd have to concentrate and
handle this sort of paperwork and detail in the middle of all this
chaos." He took a bite. "What chaos?" She smiled again, jotting down notes.
He didn't even see it any longer, she realized. Or hear it. All the
noise, the movement, the rush. Dozens of little dramas had taken
place that morning, fascinating her, unnoted by him. "They brought a drug dealer in
over there." She gestured with a nod as she continued to write.
"Skinny guy in a white fedora and striped jacket, wearing a
heavy dose of designer cologne." "Pasquale," Alex said, noting
the description. "So?" "You saw him?" "I smelled him." He shrugged.
"Wasn't my collar." Chuckling to herself, Bess crossed her
legs and got comfortable. "A Korean shopkeeper came rushing in
shouting about vandalism at his store. He was so excited he lost most
of his English. They sent out for an interpreter." "Yeah, it happens." What was
her point? he wondered. She only smiled and finished her
chocolate. "Right after that, they brought in a woman who'd been
knocked around by her boyfriend. She was sitting over there—defending
him, even while her face was swelling. The detective at the far end
had a fight with his wife over the phone. He forgot their
anniversary." "Must have been Rogers. He's
always fighting with his wife." Impatience rippled back. "What's
that got to do with anything?" "Atmosphere," she told him.
"You've stopped noticing it and become a part of it. It's
interesting to see. And you're very organized," she added,
licking chocolate from her thumb. "Not like Judd over there,
with all his neat little piles, but in the way you spread things out
and know just where to find the right piece of paper at the right
time." "I hate having you stare at me
when I work." He slapped her hand away from the autopsy report. "I know." Unoffended, she
grinned. She leaned a little closer. There was something in her eyes
besides humor, he noted. He wasn't sure if he'd ever seen desire and
amusement merged in the same expression before. And he certainly
hadn't realized how the combination could make a man's blood hum.
"You look very sexy plowing your way through all this, gun
strapped to your side, your hair all messed up from raking your
fingers through it. That keen, dangerous look in your eyes." Mortified, he shifted in his chair.
"Cut it out, McNee." "I like the way your eyes get all
dark and intense when you're taking down some important tidbit of
information over the phone." "For all you know, that was my dry
cleaner." "Uh-uh." She took his coffee
to wash down the last bite of candy bar. "Tell me something,
Alexi. Are you annoyed that I'm here, or are you nervous that I'm
here?" "Both." He rose. There must
be something he had to do someplace else. "That's what I thought." She
hooked a finger around the strap of his holster. She wasn't afraid of
the gun he wore. In fact, she was counting on talking him into
letting her hold it one day. So that she could see how it felt. How
he felt when he was forced to draw it. "You know, you haven't
even kissed me." "I'm not going to kiss you. Here." She lifted her eyes, slowly. There was
a definite dare in them. "Why not?" "Because the next time I kiss
you—" watching her, he slid a hand around her throat, his
thumb caressing her collarbone, until her cocky smile faded away
"—really kiss you, it's just going to be you and me.
Alone. And I'm going to keep right on kissing you, and all sorts of
other things, until there aren't any more rules. Any more reasons." Was that what she wanted? She thought
it was. Right now, when her skin was humming where his fingers lay,
she thought it was exactly what she wanted. But there was something
else, some complex mixture of yearning and fear, so unfamiliar it
caused her to step back. "What's wrong, McNee?"
Delighted by her reaction, he let his hand slide down her shoulder
and away. "Who's making who nervous now?" "We're supposed to be working,"
she reminded him. "Not making each other nervous." "Today, when I go off the clock,
so do you." "Stanislaski." Alex's eyes stayed on hers another
moment before flicking behind her. "Captain." "Sorry to interrupt your social
hour," he said sourly. "I need that report." "Right here." Even as Alex
was turning to reach for it, Bess was offering her hand to
Trilwalter. "Captain, it's so nice to meet
you. I'm Bess McNee. I wanted to let you know how much I appreciate
the department's cooperation today." Trilwalter scowled at her a moment,
then, remembering, stifled a sigh. "Right. You're the writer."
A sneer twisted his mouth. "Soap operas." "Yes, I am." Her smile made
the fluorescents overhead dim. "I wonder… if I can have
just a moment of your time? I know you're very busy, so I won't keep
you." He didn't want any part of her. He knew
it, she knew it, and so did any of the cops hovering close enough to
hear. But riding a desk had taught him that diplomacy was often his
only weapon. Besides, once he made his feelings known, she'd be out
of his hair and off finding another precinct to haunt. "Why don't you come into my
office, Ms. McNee?" "Thank you." She shot a grin
over her shoulder at Alex as she followed Trilwalter. "You going to let her go in there
alone?" Judd murmured. "Yeah." Alex bit back a
chuckle as he heard the glass of Trilwalter's door rattle. "Oh,
yeah. And I'm going to enjoy it." Ten minutes later, Alex was surprised
by a burst of laughter. Swiveling in his chair, he spotted Trilwalter
leading Bess out of his office. The two of them were chuckling
together like two old friends over a private joke. "I'm going to remember that one,
Bess." "Just don't tell the mayor where
you heard it." "I know how to respect a source."
Still smiling, he glanced over at a slack-jawed Alex. "Detective,
you take care of Ms. McNee. Make sure she gets what she needs." "Sir." He cut his eyes over
to Bess. She merely batted her lashes, managing to look about as
innocent as a smoking gun. "I have every intention of making
certain Ms. McNee gets exactly what she needs." Bess laid her hand in Trilwalter's.
"Thank you again, Donald." "My pleasure. Don't be a
stranger." "Donald?" Alex said, the
moment the captain was out of earshot. "Yes." Bess made a production
out of brushing dust from her sleeve. "That is his name." "We use several other names for
him around here. What the hell did you do in there?" "Why, we chatted. What else?" Glancing over her shoulder, Alex
noticed money changing hands. The odds had been even that Trilwalter
would chew her up, then spit her out, within ten minutes. Since he'd
lost twenty on the deal himself, Alex wasn't particularly pleased. "Sit down and be quiet," he
told her. "I've got work." "Of course." Before she could take her seat, his
phone rang. "Stanislaski. Yeah." He listened a moment, then
pulled out his notepad to scribble. "I hear you. You know how it
works, Boomer. It depends on what it's worth." Nodding to
himself, he replaced the pad. "Yeah, we'll talk. I'll be there.
In ten." When Alex hung up the phone and grabbed
for his jacket, Bess was right behind him. "What is it?" "I've got someplace to go. Judd,
let's hit it." "I'm going with you." Alex didn't even glance back as he
started out. He was already working on tucking her in some far corner
of his mind. "Forget it." "I'm going with you," she
repeated, and snagged his arm. "That's the deal." It surprised him when he tried to shake
her off and she wouldn't shake. The lady had a good grip, he noted.
"I didn't make any deal." She could be just as tough and
cold-blooded as he, she thought. She planted her feet, angled her
chin. "Your captain did. I ride with you, Detective, wherever
you may be going. A day in the life, remember?" "Fine." Frustration vibrated
through him as he stared her down. "You ride—and you stay
in the car. No way you're scaring off my snitch." "Want me to drive?" Judd
offered as they headed down the steps to the garage. "No." Alex's answer was flat
and left no room for argument. Judd sent Bess a good-natured shrug.
Then, because Alex made no move to do so, he opened the back door of
their nondescript unmarked car for her. "Where are we going?" Bess
asked, determined to be pleasant. "To talk to the scum of the
earth," Alex shot back as he pulled out of the garage. "Sounds fascinating," Bess
said, and meant it. She didn't think she'd ever been in
this part of town before. Many of the shop windows were boarded up.
Those still in business were grubbier than usual. People still walked
as though they were in a hurry, but it didn't look as if they had
anyplace to go. Funny, she thought, how Alex seemed to
blend with the surroundings. It wasn't simply the jeans and battered
jacket he wore, or the hair he'd deliberately mussed. It was a look
in the eyes, a set of the body, a twist of the mouth. No one would
look twice at him, she thought. Or if they bothered, they wouldn't
see a cop, they'd see another street tough obviously on the edge of
his luck. Taking her cue from him, she pulled out
her bag of cosmetics, darkening her mouth, adding just a little too
much eyeliner and shadow. She tried a couple of bored looks in the
mirror of her compact and decided to tease up her hair. Alex glanced back at her and scowled.
"What the hell are you doing to your face?" "Getting into character," she
said blithely. "Just like you. Are we going to bust somebody?" He only turned away and muttered. Just his luck, he thought. He wanted to
slip into Boomer's joint unobtrusively, and he was stuck with a
redhead who thought they were playing cops and robbers. Unoffended, Bess put away her mirror
and scanned the area. Parking wasn't a problem here. Bess decided
that if anyone left his car unattended in this neighborhood for above
ten minutes, he'd come back and be lucky to find a hubcap. Alex swung over the curb and swore. He
couldn't leave her in the car here, damn it. Any of the hustlers or
junkies on the streets would take one look, then eat her alive. "You listen to me." He
turned, leaning over the seat to make his point. "Stay close to
me, and keep your mouth shut. No questions, no comments." "All right, but where—" "No questions." He slammed
out of his door, then waited for her. With his hand firm on her arm,
he hauled her to the sidewalk. "If you step out of line, I
swear, I'll slap the cuffs on you." "Romantic, isn't he?" she
said to Judd. "Just sends shivers down my spine." "Keep a lid on it, McNee,"
Alex told her, refusing to be amused. He pulled her through a grimy
door into an airless shop. It took her a minute to get her
bearings in the dim light. There were shelves and shelves crowded
with dusty merchandise. Radios, picture frames, kitchenware. A tuba.
A huge glass display counter with a diagonal crack across it
dominated one wall. Security glass ran to the ceiling. Cutting
through it was a window, like a bank teller's, studded with bars. "A pawnshop," Bess said, with
such obvious delight that Alex snarled at her. "One word about atmosphere, I'll
clobber you." But she was already dragging out her
notebook. "Go ahead, do what you have to do. You won't even know
I'm here." Sure, he thought. How would anyone know
she was there, simply because that sunshine scent of her cut right
through the grime and must? He stepped up to the counter just as a
scrawny man in a loose white shirt came through the rear door. "Stanislaski." "Boomer. What have you got for
me?" Grinning, Boomer passed a hand over his
heavily greased black hair. "Come on, I got some good stuff, and
you know I make a point of cooperating with the law. But a man's got
to make a living." "You make one ripping off every
poor slob who walks through the door." "Aw, now you hurt my feelings."
Boomer's pale blue eyes glittered. "Rookie?" he asked,
nodding at Judd. "He used to be." After an appraising look, Boomer
glanced over at Bess. She was busy poking through his merchandise.
"Looks like I got me a customer. Hang on." "She's with me." Alex shot
him a knife-edged look that forestalled any questions. "Just
forget she's here." Boomer had already appraised the trio
of rings on Bess's right hand, and the blue topaz drops at her cars.
He sighed his disappointment. "You're the boss, Stanislaski. But
listen, I like to be discreet." Alex leaned on the counter, like a man
ready to shoot the bull for hours. His voice was soft, and deadly.
"Jerk my chain, Boomer, and I'm going to have to come down here
and take a hard look at what you keep in that back room." "Stock. Just stock." But he
grinned. He didn't have any illusions about Alex. Boomer knew when he
was detested, but he also knew they had an agreement of sorts. And,
thus far, it had been advantageous to both of them. "I got
something on those hookers that got sliced up." Though his expression didn't change,
though he didn't move a muscle, Alex went on alert. "What kind
of something?" Boomer merely smiled and rubbed his
thumb and forefinger together. When Alex drew out a twenty, it
disappeared quickly through the bars. "Twenty more, if you like
what I have to say." "If it's worth it, you'll get it." "You know I trust you."
Smelling of hair grease and sweat, Boomer leaned closer. "Word
on the street is you're looking for some high roller. Guy's name's
Jack." "So far I'm not impressed." "Just building up to it, pal. The
first one that was wasted? She was one of Big Ed's wives. I
recognized her from the newspaper picture. Now, she was fine-looking.
Not that I ever used her services." "Turn the page, Boomer." "Okay, okay." He shot a grin
at Judd. "He don't like conversation. I heard both those
unfortunate ladies were in possession of a certain piece of jewelry." "You've got good ears." "Man in my position hears things.
It so happens I had a young lady come in just yesterday. She had a
certain piece of jewelry she wanted to exchange." Opening a
drawer, Boomer pulled out a thin gold chain. Dangling from it was a
heart, cracked down the center. When Alex held out a hand, Boomer
shook his head. "I gave her twenty for it." Saying nothing, Alex pulled another
bill out of his wallet. "Seems to me I'm entitled to a
certain amount of profit." Eyes steady, Alex pulled the twenty
back an inch. "You're entitled to go in and answer a bunch of
nasty questions down at the cop shop." With a shrug, Boomer exchanged the bill
for the heart. He'd only given ten for it, in any case. "She
wasn't much more than a kid," Boomer added. "Eighteen,
maybe twenty at a stretch. Still pretty. Bottle blonde, blue eyes.
Little mole right here." He tapped beside his left eyebrow. "Got an address?" "Well, now…" "Twenty for the address, Boomer."
Alex's tone told the man to take it. "That's it." Satisfied, Boomer named a hotel a few
blocks away. "Signed her name Crystal," he added, wanting
to keep the partnership intact. "Crystal LaRue. Figure she made
it up." "Let's check it out," he said
to Judd, then tapped Bess on the shoulder. She was apparently
absorbed in an ugly brass lamp in the shape of a rearing horse.
"Let's go." "In a minute." She turned a
smile on Boomer. "How much?" "Oh, for you—" "Forget it." Alex was
dragging her to the door. "I want to buy—" "It's ugly." Annoyed at the loss, but pleased to
have recorded the entire conversation, she sighed. "That's the
point." But she climbed meekly into the car and began to
scribble her impressions in her book. Cramped shop. Very dirty. Mostly junk.
Excellent place for props. Proprietor a complete sleaze. Alexi in
complete control of exchange—a kind of game-playing. Quietly
disgusted but willing to use the tools at hand. By the time she'd finished scribbling,
Alex was pulling to the curb again. "Same rules," he said to Bess
as they climbed out of the car. "Absolutely." Lips pursed,
she studied the crumbling hotel. She recognized it as a
rent-by-the-hour special. "Is this where she lives?" "Who?" "The girl you were talking about."
She lifted a brow. "I have ears, too, Alexi." He should have known. "As long as
you keep your mouth shut." "There's no need to be rude,"
she told him as they started in. "Tell you what, just to show
there's no hard feelings, I'll buy you both lunch." "Great." Judd gallantly
opened the door for her. "You're so easy," Alex
muttered to his partner as they entered the filthy lobby. "Hey, we gotta eat sometime." He hated to bring her in here, Alex
realized. Into this dirty place that smelled of garbage and moldy
dreams. How could she be so unaffected by it? he wondered, then
struggled to put thoughts of her aside as he approached the desk
clerk. "You got a Crystal LaRue?" The clerk peered over his newspaper.
There was an un-filtered cigarette dangling from the corner of his
mouth and total disinterest in his eyes. "Don't ask for names." Alex merely pulled out his badge,
flashed it. "Blonde, about eighteen. Good-looking. A beauty mark
beside her eyebrow. Working girl." "Don't ask what they do for a
living, neither." With a shrug, the clerk went back to his
paper. "Two-twelve." "She in?" "Haven't seen her go out." With Bess trailing behind, they started
up the steps. To entertain herself, she read the various tenants'
suggestions and statements that were scrawled on the walls. There was a screaming match in progress
behind one of the doors on the first floor. Someone was banging on
the wall from a neighboring room and demanding—in colorful
terms—that the two opponents quiet down. A bag of garbage had spilled on the
stairs between the second and first floors. It had gone very ripe. Alex rapped on the door of 212, waited.
He rapped again and called out. "Crystal. Need to talk to you." With a glance at Judd, Alex tried the
door. The knob turned easily. "In a place like this, you'd think
she'd lock it," Judd commented. "And wire it with explosives,"
Alex added. He slipped out his gun, and Judd did the same. "Stay
in the hall," he ordered Bess without looking at her. They went
through the door, guns at the ready. She did exactly what she was told. But
that didn't stop her from seeing. Crystal hadn't gone out, and she
wouldn't be walking the streets again. As the door hung open, Bess
stared at what was sprawled across the sagging mattress inside. The
stench of blood—and worse—streamed through the open
doorway. Death. Violent death. She had written
about it, discussed it, watched gleefully as it was acted out for the
cameras. But she'd never seen it face-to-face.
Had never known how completely a human being could be turned into a
thing. From far away, she heard Alex swear,
over and over, but she could only stare, frozen, until his body
blocked her view. He had his hands on her shoulders, squeezing. God,
she was cold, Bess thought. She'd never been so cold. "I want you to go downstairs." She managed to lift her gaze from his
chin to his eyes. The iced fury in them had her shivering. "What?" He nearly swore again. She was white as
a sheet, and her pupils had contracted until they were hardly bigger
than the point of a pin. "Go downstairs, Bess." He tried to
rub the chill out of her arms, knowing he couldn't. "Are you
listening to me?" he said, his voice quiet, gentle. "Yes." She moistened her
lips, pressed them together. "I'm sorry, yes." "Go down, stay in the lobby. Don't
say anything, don't do anything, until Judd or I come down. Okay?"
He gave her a little shake, and wondered what he would do if she
folded on him. "Okay?" She took one shaky breath, then nodded.
"She's… so young." With an effort, she swallowed the
sickness that kept threatening to rise in her throat. "I'm all
right. Don't worry about me. I'm all right," she repeated, then
turned .away to go downstairs. "She shouldn't have seen this,"
Judd said. His own stomach was quivering. "Nobody should see this."
Banking down on every emotion, Alex closed the door at his back. She stuck it out, refusing to budge
when Judd came down to drive her home. After finding an old chair,
she settled into a corner while the business of death went on around
her. From her vantage point, she watched them come and go—forensics,
the police photographer, the morgue. Detached, she studied the people who
crowded in, asking questions, making comments, being shuffled out
again by blank-faced cops. There was grief in her for a girl she
hadn't known, a fury at the waste of a life. But she remained. Not
because of the job. Because of Alex. He was angry with her. She understood
it, and didn't question it. When they were finished at the scene, she
rode in silence in the back of the car. Back at the station, she took
the same chair she'd had that morning. Hours went by, endlessly long. At one
point she slipped out and bought Alex and Judd sandwiches from a
deli. After a time, he went into another room. She followed, still
silent, noted a board with pictures tacked to it. Horrible pictures. She looked away from them, took a chair
and listened while Alex and other detectives discussed the latest
murder and the ongoing investigation. Later, she rode with him back to the
pawnshop. Waited patiently while he questioned Boomer again. Waited
longer while he and Judd returned to the motel to reinterview the
clerk, the tenants. Like them, she learned little about
Crystal LaRue. Her name had been Kathy Segal, and she'd once lived in
Wisconsin. It had been hard, terribly hard, for Bess to listen when
Alex tracked down and notified her parents. Hard, too, to understand
from Alex's end of the conversation that they didn't care. For them,
their daughter had already been dead. She'd been nobody's girl. She'd worked
the streets on her own. Two months after she moved into the tiny
little room with the sagging mattress, she had died there. No one had
known her. No one had wanted to know her. No one had cared. Alex couldn't talk to Bess. It was
impossible for him. Intolerable. He shared this part of his life with
no one who mattered to him. It was true that his sister Rachel saw
some of it as a public defender but as far as Alex was concerned that
was too much. Perhaps that was why he kept all the pieces he could
away from the rest of his family and loved ones. He hated remembering the look on Bess's
face as she'd stood in that doorway. There should have been a way to
protect her from that, to shield her from her own stubbornness. But he hadn't protected her, he hadn't
shielded her, though that was precisely what he had sworn to do for
people he'd never met from the first day he'd worn a badge. Yet for
her, for the woman he was—God, yes, the woman he was in love
with—he'd opened the door himself and let her in. So he didn't talk to her, not even when
it was time to turn it off and go home. And in the silence, his anger
built and swelled and clawed at his guts. He found the words when he
stepped into her apartment and closed the door. "Did you get enough?" Bess was in no mood to fight. Her
emotions, always close to the surface, had been wrung dry by what
she'd seen and heard that day. She would let him yell, if that was
what he needed, but she was tired, she was aching, and her heart went
out to him. "Let me get you a drink," she
said quietly, but he snagged her arm and whirled her back. "Is it all in your notes?"
That cold, terribly controlled fury swiped out at her. "Can you
find a way to use it to entertain those millions of daytime viewers?" "I'm sorry." It was all she
could think of. "Alexi, I'm so sorry." She took a deep
breath. "I want a brandy. I'll get us both one." "Fine. A nice, civilized brandy is
just what we need." She walked away to choose a bottle from
an old lacquered cabinet. "I don't know what you want me to
say." Very carefully, very deliberately, she poured two
snifters. "I'll apologize for choosing today to do this, if that
helps. I'll apologize for making it more difficult for you by being
there when this happened." She brought the snifter to him, but
he didn't take it "Right now, I'd be willing to say anything
you'd like to hear." He couldn't get beyond it, no matter
what she said. He couldn't get beyond knowing he'd opened the door on
the kind of horror she'd never be able to forget. "You had no
business being there. You had no business seeing any of that." With a sigh, she set both snifters
aside. Maybe brandy wouldn't help after all. "You were there.
You saw it." His eyes flashed white heat. "It's
my damn job." "I know." She lifted a hand
to his cheek, soothing. "I know." Compelled, he grabbed her wrist, held
tight a moment before he turned away. "I don't want you touched
by it. I don't want you touched by it ever again." "I can't promise that."
Because it was her way, she wrapped her arms around his waist, rested
her cheek against his back. He was rigid as steel, unyielding as
granite. "Not if you want something between us." "It's because I do want something
between us." "Alexi." So many emotions,
she thought. Always before it had been easy to sort them out, to
drift with them. But this time… It had been a long, hard day,
she reminded herself. There would be time to think later. "If
what you want is someone you can tuck in a comfortable corner, it
isn't me. What you do is part of what you are." -When he turned,
she brushed her hands over his cheeks again, refusing to let him
retreat. "You want me to say I was appalled by what I saw in
that room? I was. I was appalled by the cruelty of it, sickened by
the terrible, terrible waste." That sliced at him, a long, thin blade
through the heart. "I shouldn't have let you go with me. That
part of my life isn't ever going to be part of yours." "Stop." The sorrow that had
paled her face hardened into determination. "Do you think that
because I write fantasy I don't know anything about the real world?
You're wrong. I know, it just doesn't overwhelm my life. And I know
that what you faced today you may face tomorrow. Or worse. I know
that every time you walk out the door you may not come back."
The quick lick of fear reminded her to slow down and speak carefully.
"What you are makes that a very real possibility. But I won't
let that overwhelm me, either. Because there's nothing about you I'd
change." For a moment, he simply stared at her,
a hundred different feelings fighting for control inside him. Then,
slowly, he lowered his brow to hers and shut her eyes. "I don't
know what to say to you." "You don't have to say anything.
We don't have to talk at all." He knew what she was offering, even
before she tilted her head and touched her lips to his. He wanted it,
and her. More than anything, he wanted to steep himself in her until
the rest of the world went away. He took his hands through her hair,
letting his fingers toy with those loose, vivid curls. "We
haven't come up with those rules." Her lips curved, slanted over his.
"We'll figure them out later." He murmured his agreement, drawing her
closer. "I want you. I need to be with you. I think I'd go crazy
if I couldn't be with you tonight." "I'm here. Right here." "Bess." His mouth moved from
hers to skim along those sharp cheekbones. "I'm in love with
you." She felt her heart stutter. That was
the only way she could describe this sensation she'd never
experienced before. "Alexi—" "Don't." He closed his mouth
over hers again. "Don't say it. It comes too easy to you. Just
come to bed." He buried his face against her neck. "For
God's sake, let me take you to bed."
Chapter 8
Contents - Prev/Next Hurt. Oh, she'd read the stories and
the poetry, watched the movies. She'd even written the scenes. But
she'd never believed that love and pain existed together, could twine
into one clenched fist to batter the soul. Yet his words had hurt
her—immeasurably—even as her heart opened to give and
accept. This time it was different. How could
she possibly explain that to him, when she was still groping for the
answers herself? And what good were words now, when there was so much
need? A touch would be enough, she promised
herself as they swayed toward the steps. Tonight would be enough, and
tomorrow all the aches would only be memories. His mouth came back to hers, restless,
insistent, as they began the climb. The first helpless sigh caught in
her throat as he pulled her close and aroused her unbearably with a
long, sumptuous meeting of lips. Her fingers trembled when she tugged at
his jacket. Had they ever trembled for a man before? she wondered.
No. And as the leather slid away, leaving
her free to grip those magnificent shoulders, she knew that none of
this had happened before. Not the trembling, not the raw scrape of
nerves, not the sting of bright tears, not the sweet, slow throb of
her blood. This was the first time for so many
things. He didn't know how much longer he could perform the simple
act of drawing breath in and out of his lungs. Not when her body was
shivering against his. Not when he could hear those small,
desperately needy sounds in her throat. The staircase seemed to
stretch interminably. With a muffled oath, he swept her up into his
arms. Her eyes met his, and though her heart
seemed ready to burst, she managed to smile. She knew he needed
smiles tonight. "And I said you weren't romantic." "I have my moments." Shaky, she nuzzled her face into the
curve of his neck. "I'm awfully glad I'm here for this one." "Keep it up," he said in a
strained voice as she ran nibbling kisses from throat to ear, "and
I'll do something really romantic, like falling on my face and
dropping you." "Oh, I trust you, Detective."
She caught the lobe of his ear in her teeth and felt the quick jerk
of reaction. "Completely." With his heart roaring in his head, he
reached the top. She was teasing his jawline now, making little
murmurs of approval as she sampled his flesh." He headed for the
first door. "This better be the bedroom." "Mmm-hmm…" While she
worked her way to his mouth, her fingers were busy unbuttoning his
shirt. He recognized her scent first. Even as
he passed through the doorway, it wrapped its alluring woman's
fingers around him. That cheerful, sexy fragrance hung in the air,
the result, no doubt, of spilled powder and an unstoppered bottle of
perfume. Her clothes were a colorful mess of silk blouses, bright
cotton pants, tangled hose. His quick scan passed over a life-size
stuffed ostrich, a pair of thriving ficus trees flanking the wide
window, and a collection of antique bottles, elegant in jewel colors,
before he focused on the bed. It was a long, wide ocean of cool blue
sheets, topped by a lush mountain of vivid-toned pillows. All satins
and silks. Because his mouth was beginning to
water, he took one long, slow breath. But the air, so fragrant,
burned his lungs. "That looks big enough for six close friends." "I like a lot of room." Even
as his stomach quivered at the images that evoked, she was
continuing. "I used to fall out of bed a lot when I was a kid." "Is that how you broke your nose?" "No. But I chipped a tooth once." He set her down beside the bed, pleased
that her arms stayed linked around his neck. "I think we can
probably keep from falling out of this one. If we work on it." She raised up on her toes, just a
little, just enough to bring them eye-to-eye. "I'm willing to
risk it." Determined to steady himself, he kissed
her brow, her cheeks. "Let me take my gun off." He stripped off the holster, set it on
the floor. With fingers that were suddenly numb and awkward, she
reached for the buttons of her blazer. "No." It was that one quick
flash of nerves in her eyes that had settled his own. He closed his
hands over hers. "Let me." He unfastened buttons, then took
his hands slowly up her sides, his thumbs just brushing her breasts.
"You're shaking." "I know." Watching her, he slid the jacket from
her shoulders. "Are you afraid of me?" "No." She couldn't swallow.
"Of this, a little. It's silly." He toyed with the first button of her
blouse, then the second. Her skin quivered as his knuckle skimmed
over it. "I like it." "That's good." She tried to
laugh, but only managed one trembling breath. "Because I can't
seem to stop." "There's plenty of time to relax."
The blouse slipped away, and desire curled its powerful fist in his
stomach. Midnight-blue silk shimmered in the dimming light, gleaming
against ivory skin. "There's no hurry." "I—" Her head fell back
as he traced a finger over the silk. Gently, so gently, over the
swell of her breasts, as though hers was the first body he'd touched.
The only one he wanted to touch. "God, Alexi…" "I've spent a lot of time
imagining this. Step out of your shoes," he suggested while he
unhooked her slacks. In a daze, she obeyed as the slacks slithered
down her legs. "I'm going to spend a lot more time enjoying it.
I want all of you." Lazily, testingly, he ran a finger under the
lace cut high on her thigh. Ah, the skin there was like rose petals
dewed with morning. Her eyes went wide and dark; her body quaked.
"All of you," he repeated. She couldn't move. Every muscle in her
body had turned to water. Hot, rushing water. She couldn't speak, not
when so many emotions clogged her throat. As she stood swaying,
helplessly seduced, he watched her. Touched her. Clever fingers
brushing, stroking, exploring. He trailed them up her arms, slid them
over her shoulders. Then back to silk, until her body burned like
fever. His eyes never left hers. Even when he
kissed her, lightly, tormenting her hungry lips with the barest of
tastes, his eyes stayed open and aware. "You're making me crazy." Her
voice hitched out through trembling lips. "I know. I want to." He caught her wrists when she reached
for him, then ran their tangled fingers over her, so that she felt
her own response to him, inside and out, as he touched his mouth to
hers again. Patiently, erotically, he deepened the kiss, until her
hands went limp and her pulse thundered. Then he brought her hands
up, spread them over his chest. Together they spread his open shirt
apart. With his mouth still clinging to hers, he tugged it off. His
heart gave a quick, hard lurch as her hands, hot and eager, raced
over him. Yanking her close, he took off his
shoes. His skin was already damp when he fumbled for the snap of his
jeans. "I want you under me." He
tore his mouth from hers to savor her throat. "I want to feel
you move under me." They lowered to the bed, rolled once,
then twice, over silk. He used every ounce of control, every degree
of will, to keep himself from plunging into her and taking the quick,
desperate release his body craved. His mind, his soul, wanted more
than that. She seemed smaller like this. Slighter.
It helped him remember that passion could outstrip tenderness. So,
while the blood pounded and burned in his veins, he loved her slowly. She discovered that a woman could drown
willingly in sweetness. She knew there was a gun on the floor beside
them and that he had used it at least once to kill. But the hands
that moved over her were those of a gentle man. One who cared. She
rested a palm on his cheek as she floated away on the kiss. One who
loved. Who loved her. Staggered by the knowledge, she poured
everything she had into the kiss, needing to show him that whatever
he felt was returned, equally. Then his mouth slid from hers to trail
down her throat, over her shoulder. All thought, all reason,
skittered away. In a warm, slippery pool of silk and
satin, he showed her what it was to ache for someone. To yearn for
the sharp, thin point of pain the poets call ecstasy. Her hips arched
under his, desperately offering. But he only continued that
tormenting journey over her with teasing lips and gentle hands. When his tongue flicked under the line
of lace that clung tenuously to her breasts, she moaned, pressing an
urgent hand to the back of his head. The taste there—honey,
dampened by her arousal—nearly unraveled the taut knot of his
control. So he pleased them both, closing a greedy mouth over that
firm, scented swell. Gasping out with pleasure, she bucked
under him, straining for more, her nails digging heedlessly into his
back as she whimpered and struggled for what was just out of reach.
Maddened by her response, he brought his mouth to hers again,
crushing her lips as he slithered a hand down to cup the heat between
her thighs. Prayers and pleas trembled on her tongue, but before she
could voice them, he slipped under the silk to stroke. The unbearable pleasure shattered.
Fractured lights, whirling colors, spun behind her eyes to blind her.
She heard herself cry out; his name was nearly a sob. Then there was
his groan, a sound of sweet satisfaction as her body went limp in
release. Never before. Her hands slid away from
him, boneless. Sweet Lord, never like this. She felt weak, wrecked,
weepy. As her breath sobbed out, as her eyes fluttered closed, they
both knew that her mind, her body, were totally his for the taking. He'd never felt stronger. Her wild
response, her absolute surrender, filled him with a kind of intense
power he'd never experienced before. Silk rustled against silk as he
drew the teddy down, tossed it aside. Her skin, slick with passion,
glowed in the shadows. He touched where he chose, watching,
fascinated, as his own hands molded her. Gold against ivory. He
tasted wherever he liked, feeling her muscles quiver involuntarily as
he traced openmouthed kisses over her rib cage, down to her stomach.
Heat to heat. Then, wanting that instant of sheer
pleasure again, he drove her up a second time, shuddering himself as
her body convulsed and flowed with the crest of the wave. At last,
unable to wait a moment longer, he slipped inside that hot, moist
sheath. Her groan of stunned delight echoed his own. Slowly, as in a dream, her arms lifted
to wrap around him. She rose to meet him, to take him deep. They
moved gently at first, treasuring the intimacy, willing to prolong
it. But need outpaced them, driving them faster, until, thrust for
thrust, they sprinted toward the final crest. His hand fisted in her hair as the last
link of control snapped clean. Her name exploded from his lips like
an oath as he emptied himself into her. She wondered how she could ever have
thought herself experienced. While it was true she hadn't been with
as many men as some thought, she hadn't come to Alexi an innocent. Yet things had happened tonight that
had never happened before. And, because she was a woman who
understood herself well, she knew that nothing she had experienced
here would happen again—unless it was with him. Relaxed now,
she rubbed her cheek over his chest, content to remain as she'd been
since he rolled over and dragged her across him. Tucked in the cocoon
of his arms, she felt as cozy as a cat, and she arched lazily as he
ran a hand down her spine. "Will you tell me again?" she
asked. "What?" She pressed her lips against him,
feeling his heart beating strong and fast beneath them. "What
every woman wants to hear." "I love you." When she lifted
her head, he laid a hand gently over her lips. He knew it would hurt
to hear her say it, when she didn't mean it as he did. Suddenly she was glad it was dark, and
he couldn't see the smile fade away from her face. "Even after
this," she said carefully, "you don't want me to love you
back." More than anything, he thought. More
than life. "Let's just leave things as they are." He traced
her face with a fingertip, enjoying those odd angles. "Tell me
how you broke your nose." She was silent a moment, gathering her
composure. She couldn't offer what he didn't want to take.
"Fistfight." He chuckled and drew her back to
cuddle, instinctively soothing the tension out of her. "I should
have figured." She made an effort to relax against
him. There was time to convince him. Hadn't he said they had plenty
of time? "At boarding school," she added. "I was
twelve and homely as a duck. Too skinny, funny hair, dumb face." "I like your face. And your hair."
His hand cupped her breast comfortably. "And your body." "You didn't know me when I was
twelve. When you're odd in any way, you're a target." "I know." Interested, she lifted her head again.
"Do you?" "I didn't learn English until I
was five. Before my father's business got off the ground, times were
rough." He turned his face into her hair to breathe in the
scent. "I was this little Ukrainian kid, wearing my brother's
hand-me-downs. And back then, Soviets weren't particularly popular
with Americans." "Well, you made such great
villains." She kissed his cheek, comforting the small boy he'd
been. "It must have been difficult for you." "I had the family. We had each
other. School was a little rugged at first. Name-calling, playground
scuffles. Even some of the parents weren't too keen on having their
kids play with the Russkie. No point in trying to explain we were
Ukrainian." He shifted, tangled his legs with hers. "So,
after a few black eyes and bloody noses, I earned a reputation for
being tough. After a while, we kind of got absorbed into the
neighborhood." "What neighborhood?" "Brooklyn. My parents still live
there. Same house." With a shake of his head, he drew back. He
could make her out now in the dark, could see the way her eyes were
smiling at him. "How come we're talking about me, when I asked
you about your nose?" "I like hearing it." "There was a fistfight," he
said, prompting her. Bess sighed. "One of those girl
cliques," she began. "You know the type. The cool kids, all
hair and teeth and attitude. I was the nerd they liked to pick on." "You were never a nerd." "I was a champion nerd. Gawky, top
of the class academically, socially inept." "You?" There was such pure disbelief in the
tone, she laughed. "Which of those descriptions don't you buy,
Alexi?" He considered a moment. "Any of
them." "I guess I'm two-thirds flattered
and one-third insulted. I was tall for my age and skinny. A very late
bloomer in the bosom and hips department." "You might have bloomed slow,"
he began, proving his point with a sweep of his hand, "but you
bloomed very well." "Thank you. My mind, however, had
developed quite nicely. Straight A's." "No kidding?" He grinned in
the dark. "And you were the kid who always trashed the grading
curve for the rest of us." "That's the idea. Added to that, I
was more comfortable with a book, or thinking, than I was tittering.
Young girls do a lot of tittering. Because I was hardheaded, I
automatically took a dislike to anything that was popular or
fashionablc at the time. As a result, I took a lot of flak. Bess the
Mess, that sort of thing." She paused long enough to shift some
pillows. "Anyway, we had this history exam coming up. One of the
cool kids—her name was Dawn Gallagher… Heart-shaped
face, perfect features, long, flowing blond hair. You get the
picture." "Prom-queen type." "Exactly. She was flunking
big-time and wanted me to let her copy from my paper. She'd made my
life adolescent hell, and she figured if she was nice to me for a
couple of days, let me stand within five feet of her, maybe sit at
the. same lunch table, I'd be so grateful, I'd let her." "But you hung tough." "I don't cheat for anybody. The
upshot was, she flunked the exam, and her parents were called to the
school for a conference. Dawn retaliated by pinching me whenever I
got too close, getting into my room and breaking my things, stealing
my books. Small-time terrorism. One day on the basketball court—" "You shot hoop?" "Team captain. I was an athletic
nerd," she explained. "Anyway, she tripped me. If that
wasn't bad enough, she had a few friends on the other team. They
elbowed the hell out of me during the game. I had bruises
everywhere." An immediate flood of resentment had
him tightening his hold. "Little bitches." Pleased with the support, she cuddled
closer. "It was an epiphany for me. Suddenly I saw that
pacifism, while morally sound, could get you trampled into dust. I
waited for Dawn outside the science lab one day. We started out with
words—I've always been good at them. We progressed to pushing
and shoving and drew quite a crowd. She swung first. I didn't expect
it, and she bopped me right on the nose. Let me tell you, Detective,
pain can be a great motivator." "Separates the nerds from the
toughs." "You got it. It took three of them
to pull me off her, but before they did, I'd blackened her
baby-blues, split her Cupid's-bow mouth and loosened several of her
pearly-whites." "Good for you, McNee." "It was good," she said with
a sigh. "In fact, it felt so good, I've had to be careful with
my temper ever since. I didn't just want to hurt her, you see. I
wanted to mangle her." He took her hand, curled it into a fist
and raised it to his lips. "I'll have to watch my step. Did you
take much heat?" "We both got suspended. My parents
were appalled and embarrassed enough by my behavior to cancel my
summer plans and switch me to another school." "But—" He cut himself
off. Not every family was as supportive as his. "It was the best thing that could
have happened to me," she told him. "I started off with a
clean slate. I was still ugly, but I knew how to handle myself." Even if she didn't realize she was
carrying around some emotional scars, he did. He rolled over her,
cupping her face in his hands. "Listen, McNee, you're
beautiful." Amused, she grinned. "Sure I am." He didn't smile. In the dim light, his
eyes were very intense. "I said, you're beautiful. Why else
haven't I been able to get you out of my mind since the first time I
saw you?" "Intriguing," she corrected.
"Unusual." "Gorgeous," he murmured, and
watched her blink in surprise. "Ivory for skin, fire for hair,
jade for eyes. And these." He traced a fingertip over a
sprinkling of freckles. "Gold dust." "You've already gotten me into
bed, Alexi," she said lightly. She had to speak lightly, or
she'd humiliate herself with tears. "But the flattery is
appreciated." With a grin, she linked her arms around his neck.
"But haven't you heard the one about actions speaking louder
than words?" He arched a brow. "If you insist." "Oh, I do," she murmured, as
his mouth came down to hers. "I absolutely do." With her bag slapping hard against her
hip, Bess raced into the office, ten minutes late. "I have a
good excuse," she called to Lori. Her perpetually prompt partner was
standing by the coffeepot, her back to the door. "It's all
right. I'm running behind myself." "You?" Bess dropped her bag,
stretched her shoulders. She might have skipped her workout that
morning, but she was feeling as limber as a snake. "What is it,
a national holiday?" She crossed to the pot herself, chattering
as she poured a cup. "Well, I'd save my excuse for another time,
but I can hardly stand not to tell you." She lifted shining
eyes, then stopped after one look at Lori's face. "What is it,
honey?" "It's nothing." After giving
herself a shake, Lori sipped her coffee. "It's just that Steven
caught me on my way in." "Did he say something to upset
you?" "He said he loved me." She
pressed her lips together. She'd be damned if she'd cry over him
again. "The sonofabitch." "Let's sit down." Bess curled
a comforting arm around Lori's shoulder. "You might not want to
hear this, but I think he means it." "He doesn't even know what it
means." Furious, Lori dashed one rogue tear away. "I'm not
going to let him do this to me again. Get me believing, get me all
churned up, just so he can back off when things get serious. Let him
have the fantasy life. I've got reality." Because she'd been waiting for an
opening just like this, Bess crouched down in front of her. "Which
is?" "A job, paying your bills—" "Boring," Bess finished, and
Lori's brimming eyes flashed. "Then I'm boring." "No, you're not." Sighing,
Bess set her coffee aside and took one of Lori's hands. "Maybe
you're afraid to take risks, but that doesn't make you boring. And I
know you want more out of life than a job and a good credit rating." "What's wrong with those things?" "Nothing, as long as that's not
all you have. Lori, I know you're still in love with him." "That's my problem."' "His, too. He's miserable without
you." Suddenly weary, Lori rubbed her fingers
between her brows. "He's the one who broke things off. He said
he didn't want complications, a long-term commitment." "He was wrong. I'd bet the bank
that he knows he's wrong. Why don't you just talk to him?" "I don't know if I can." She
squeezed her eyes tight. "It hurts." An odd light flickered in Bess's eyes.
"Is that how you know it's real? When it hurts?" "It's one of the top symptoms."
She opened her eyes again. This time, there was a trace of hope mixed
with the tears. "Do you really think he's unhappy?" "I know he is. Just talk, Lori.
Hear each other out." "Maybe." She gave Bess's hand
a quick squeeze, then reached for her coffee again. "I wasn't
going to dump this on you first thing." "What are pals for?" "Well, pal, we'd better get to
work, or a lot of people will be out of a job." "Great. I've been playing with the
dialogue in that scene between Storm and Jade. We want to bump up the
sexual tension." Lori was already nodding and booting up
the computer. "You're the dialogue champ," she began, then
glanced up. "So why were you late?" "It's not important. We've got
them running into each other at the station house. The long look
first, then—" "Bess, you're only making me more
curious. Get it out of the way, or I won't be able to work." "Okay." She was all but
bursting to tell, in any case. "I was with Alexi." "I thought that was yesterday." "It was." Bess's smile
spread. "And last night. And this morning. Oh, Lori, it's
incredible. I've never felt this way about anyone." "Right." She started to pick
up her reading glasses, then looked up again. For a moment, she did
nothing but study Bess's face. "Say that again." "I've never felt this way about
anyone." "Good grief." On a quick huff
of breath, Lori sat back. "I think you mean it." "It's different." With a half
laugh, Bess pressed a hand to her cheek. "It's scary, and it
hurts, and sometimes I look at him and I can't even breathe. I'm so
afraid he might take a good look at me and realize his mistake."
She let her hand drop away. "It's supposed to be easy." "No." Slowly Lori shook her
head. "That was always your mistake. It's supposed to be hard,
and scary and real." "There's this clutching around my
heart." "Yeah." "And… and…"
Frustrated, Bess turned, scooting around a chair so that she could
pace the length of the table. "And my stomach's all tied up in
knots one minute. The next I feel so happy I can hardly bear it. When
we were together last night…" No way to describe it, she
thought. No possible way. "Lori, I swear, no one's ever made me
feel like that. And this morning, when I woke up beside him, I didn't
know whether to laugh or cry." Lori rose, held out a hand.
"Congratulations, McNee. You've finally made it." "Looks that way." With a
laugh, she threw her arms around Lori and squeezed. "Why didn't
you ever tell me how it feels?" "It's something you have to
experience firsthand. How about him?" "He loves me." She felt
foolish and weepy. Digging through her bag she found a tattered
tissue. "He told me. He looked at me, and he told me. But—" "Oh-oh." "He doesn't want me to tell him
how I feel." Hissing a breath through her teeth, she pressed a
hand to her stomach. "Oh, God, it hurts. It hurts everywhere
when I realize he doesn't trust me enough. He thinks it's like all
the other times. Why shouldn't he? But I want him to know it's
not—and I don't know how.'' "He only has to look at you." "It's not enough." Calmer
now, Bess blew her nose. "Everything's different this time. I
guess I have to prove myself. I do love him, Lori." "I can see that. I wasn't sure I
ever would." Touched, she lifted a hand to Bess's hair. "You
could take your own advice, and talk to him.'' "We have talked. But he doesn't
want to hear this, at least not yet. He wants things to stay as they
are." Lori lifted her brows. "What do
you want?" "For him to be happy." She
chuckled and stuffed the mangled tissue back in her purse. "That
makes me sound like a wimp. You know I'm not." "Who knows you better? It only
makes you sound like a woman in the first dizzy stages of love." Bess gave her a watery smile. "Does
it get worse or better?" "Both." "That's good news. Well, while
it's getting worse and better, I'll have time to show him how I
feel." She picked up her coffee, then set it aside again. "Lori,
there's one more thing." "What could be bigger?" Lori
demanded. "Alexi wants me to have dinner
with his family on Sunday." After a quick gurgle of laughter,
Lori's eyes widened. "He's taking you home to Mother?" "And Father," Bess put in.
"And brothers and sisters and nieces and nephews. A couple times
a month they have a big family dinner on Sunday." "Obviously the man is crazy about
you." "He is. I know he is." Then
she shut her eyes and dropped into a chair. "His family is
enormously important to him. You can hear it every time he mentions
one of them." She grabbed another tissue and began to tear it to
shreds. "I want to meet them. Really. But what if they don't
like me?" "You have got it bad. Take it from
me, you just be the Bess McNee we all know and love, and they'll be
crazy about you, too." "But what if—" "What if you pull yourself
together?" This time Lori picked up her glasses, perched them on
her nose. "Put some of this angst into Storm and Jade's
heartbreak. Millions of viewers will thank you." After a deep breath, Bess nodded.
"Okay, okay. That might work. And if we don't get the morning
session out of the way, we won't be ready when Rosalie comes in at
noon for a consulting session." "Your deal, sister."
Frowning, Lori gestured with a pencil. "That particular lady
makes me nervous." "Don't worry about Rosalie. I know
what I'm doing." "How many times have I heard
that?" But Bess only smiled and let her mind
drift. "Okay. Storm and Jade." She closed her eyes,
envisioned the scene. "So, they run into each other at the
station…"
Chapter 9
Contents - Prev/Next And then," Bess continued as she
zipped through traffic, "Jade turns back, devastated, and says,
'But what you want isn't always what you need.' Music swells, fade
out." "It's not that I'm not fascinated
by the twists and turns of those people in Holbrook…" "Millbrook." "Right." Alex winced as she
cut off a sedan. "I just wish you'd watch the road. It would be
really embarrassing if you got a ticket while I was in the car with
you." "I'm not speeding." Frowning,
she glanced down at her speedometer. "Hardly." She handled the five speed like a
seasoned veteran of the Indianapolis 500, Alex thought. And at the
moment she was treating the other, innocent drivers on the road like
competitors. "Maybe you could find a home in one lane and stay
there." "Killjoy." But she did as he
asked. "I hardly ever get to drive. I love it." He had to smile. The wind whipping in
through the open sunroof was blowing her hair everywhere. "I'd
never have guessed." "The last time I had a chance was
when L.D. and I went to some fancy do on Long Island." She
checked her mirror and, unable to resist, shot into the next lane.
"One trip with me and he insisted on taking his car and driver
every damn place." She sent Alex a smile, then sobered instantly
when she saw his expression. "I'm sorry." "For what?" "For bringing him up." "I didn't say anything." No, he hadn't said anything, she
admitted. A man didn't have to say a word when his eyes could go that
cold. Her hands tightened on the wheel. Now she stared straight
ahead. "He was a friend, Alexi. That's
all he ever was. I didn't…" She took a long, careful
breath. "I never slept with him." "I didn't ask one way or the
other," he said coolly. "Maybe you should. One minute you
want to know all there is about me, and the next you don't. I think—" "I think you're driving too fast
again." He reached over and brushed his knuckles down her cheek.
"And you should relax. Okay?" "Okay." But her fingers
remained tight on the wheel. "I'd like—sometime—for
us to talk about it." "Sometime." Damn it, didn't
she realize he didn't want to talk about the other men who'd been
part of her life? He didn't want to think about them. Especially now,
now that he was in love, and he knew what it was like to be with her. He knew the sound of that little sigh
she made when she turned toward him in the night. The way her eyes
stayed unfocused and heavy, long after she awakened in the morning.
He knew she liked her showers too hot and too long. And that she smelled so good because
she rubbed some fragrant cream all over before she'd even dried off. She was always losing things. An
earring, a scribbled note, money. She never counted her change, and
she always overtipped. He knew those things, was coming to
treasure them. Why should he talk about other men who had come to
know them? "Turn here." "Hmm?" "I said turn…" He
trailed off with a huff of breath as she breezed by the exit. "Okay,
take the next one, and we'll double back." "The next what?" "Turn, McNee." He reached
over and gave her hair a quick tug. "Take the next turn, which
means you have to get over in the right lane." "Oh." She did, punching the
gas and handily cutting off another car. At the rude blast of its
horn, she only lifted a hand and waved. "He wasn't being friendly,"
Alex pointed out—after he took his hands from in front of his
eyes. "I know. But that's no reason for
me to be rude, too." "Some people consider cutting off
another driver rude." "No. That's an adventure." Somehow they made it without mishap.
But the moment she'd squeezed into a parking place two doors down
from his parents' row house, he held out his hand. "Keys." Sulking, she jingled them in her hand.
"I didn't get a ticket." "Probably because there wasn't a
traffic cop brave enough to pull you over. Let's have them, McNee.
I've had enough adventure for one day." "You just want to drive." Her
eyes narrowed suspiciously. "It's a man thing." "It's a survival thing." He
plucked them from her hand. "I just want to live." Not
that he was going to object to handling the natty little Mercedes.
But he decided against bringing that up as they climbed out of
opposite doors. "Pretty neighborhood," she
commented, taking in the trees and freshly painted house trim and
flowering plants, the scatter of kids riding over the uneven sidewalk
on bikes and skateboards. A few of them called out to Alex. Bess
found herself being given the once-over by a group of teenage boys
before they sent hoots and whistles and thumbs-up signs in Alex's
direction. "Ah, the first stamp of approval."
But she rubbed her damp palm surreptitiously against her skirt before
taking his hand. "Did you used to ride bikes along the
sidewalk?" "Sure." Battling nerves, she strolled with him
toward the house. "And sit on the curb in the summer and lie
about girls?" "I didn't have to lie," he
told her with a wicked grin. He glanced up the steps as the door
opened and Mikhail came out, Griff on his hip. "You're late again." He
started down, jiggling Griff. "She missed the turn." "He's always late." Mikhail
smiled. "You're Bess." "Yes. Hello." She held out a
hand and found that his was hard as rock. Griff had already leaned
over to give Alex a kiss, and now, still puckered, he leaned toward
Bess. Laughing, she pressed her mouth to his. "And hello to you,
too, handsome." "Griff likes the ladies,"
Mikhail told her. "Takes after his uncle." "Don't start," Alex muttered… Mikhail ignored him and continued to
study Bess until she was fighting the need to squirm. "Do I have
dirt on my face, or what?" "No, sorry." He shifted his
gaze to his brother. "You're improving, Alexi," he said in
Ukrainian. "This one is well worth a few sweaty mornings in the
gym." "Tak." He skimmed a hand down
to the nape of Bess's neck. "If you tell her about that, I'll
strangle you in your sleep." Mikhail's grin flashed. The resemblance
was startling, Bess thought. Those wild, dark looks, that simmering
sexuality. And the child had the looks, as well, she realized. Lord
help the women of the twenty-first century. "Guy talk?" she asked. "Bad manners," Mikhail said
apologetically, deciding he liked not only her unusual looks, but the
intelligence in her eyes, as well. Yes, indeed, he thought, Alex was
definitely improving. "I was complimenting my brother on his
taste. Take her in, Alex. Griff wants to watch the kids ride awhile." "Sydney?" he asked as he
mounted the steps. "She's here, but she's tired." "She works too hard." "There is that." The grin
spread again. "And she's pregnant." Alex stopped, turned. "Yeah?"
He went down the steps again to catch Mikhail and Griff in a bear
hug. "It's good?" . "It's great. We want our children
close, our family big." "You're off to the right start."
He grabbed Bess's hand as Mikhail lifted Griff onto his shoulders and
crossed the street. Griff was clapping his hands and shouting toddler
gibberish to the other kids. "I'm still trying to get used to
him being a papa, and now he's going to have another." She'd forgotten her nerves. Perhaps the
child's sweet, unaffected kiss had done it. She slipped an arm around
Alex's waist. "Come on, Uncle Alex. I want to meet the rest of
them." "They're loud," he warned as
they started back up the door. "I like loud." . "They can be nosy." "So can I." At the door, he took both of her hands.
He'd brought women into his home before, but it had never been
important. This was vital. "I love you, Bess." Before she
could speak, he kissed her, then pushed open the door. They certainly were loud, Bess
discovered. No one seemed to mind if everyone talked at once, or if
the big, droopy-eared dog barked and raced around the living room to
hide behind chairs. And they were nosy, though they were charming
with it. She'd hardly had a chance to get her bearings before she was
sitting next to Alex's father, Yuri, and being cagily interrogated. "So you write stories for TV."
He nodded his big, shaggy head approvingly. "You have brains." "A few." She smiled up at
Zack when he offered her a glass of wine. "Rachel says more than a few."
He sent his wife a wink as she sat with her hands folded over her
enormous belly. "She's been watching your show." "Oh, yeah?" "I admit I was curious."
Rachel wanted to shift to get comfortable, but she knew.it was
useless. "After we met, I taped it a couple of times. Then, when
I gave in to Zack's hounding me about taking maternity leave, I
realized how easy it is to get hooked. I'm not sure I've got all the
characters straight yet, but it's amazingly entertaining. Nick's
caught it with me." She glanced at her brother-in-law. To his credit, Nick didn't blush, but
he did squirm. "I was just keeping you company." He might
have come a long way from trying to prove his manhood with gangs like
the Cobras, but even at nearly twenty-one, he wasn't quite secure
enough to admit he'd gotten caught up in the "Secret Sins"
of Millbrook. He shrugged, shook back his shaggy blond hair, then
caught the quick grins of his family. "It wasn't like I was
really watching." His green eyes glinted with humor. "Except
for the babes." . "That's what they all say." Bess
smiled back, enjoying him. Too bad he wasn't an actor, she thought.
Those brooding good looks—tough, with just a hint of
vulnerability beneath—would shine on-screen. "So, who's
your type, Nick? LuAnne, our sensitive ingenue with the big, weepy
eyes, who suffers in silence, or the scheming Brooke, who uses her
sexuality to destroy any man who crosses her?" Considering, he ran his tongue around
his teeth. "Actually, I go for Jade. I've got this thing for
older women." Zack caught him in a headlock. "Hey." Nick laughed, not
bothering to try to free himself. "We're having a conversation
here. I'm trying to make tune with Alex's lady." "Kill him in the other room, will
you?" Alex said easily. "We have to eat in here." "I watch your show many times,"
Nadia said as she popped in from the kitchen. Alex's mother's
handsome face was flushed pink from oven heat. "I like it." "Well, that Yield's not hard to
watch." Zack stood behind his wife now, rubbing her shoulders. "Men always go for the cheap
floozies," Rachel put in. "How about you, Alex? Caught any
'Secret Sins'?" "No." Not that he'd admit.
"McNee keeps me up on what's happening in Millbrook." "It must be hard." Sydney,
looking pale but blissfully relaxed in her corner of the couch,
sipped her ginger ale. "The pace." "It's murder." Bess grinned.
"I love it." "So, how is it you meet Alexi?"
Yuri asked. "He arrested me." There was a moment of silence, while
Alex aimed a killing look at Bess. Then a burst of laughter that sent
the dog careening around the room again. "Did I miss a joke?" Mikhail
demanded as he swung through the door with Griff. "No." Rachel chuckled again
while her brother sat on the arm of the couch, beside his wife. "But
I have a feeling it's going to be a good one. Come on, Bess, this I
have to hear." She told them, while Alex interrupted a
half-dozen times to disagree or correct or put in his own
perspective. Even as they sat at the b'ig old table to enjoy Nadia's
pot roast, they were shouting with laughter or calling out questions. "He put you in a cell, but you
still go out with him." This from Mikhail. "Well." Bess ran her tongue
over her teeth. "He is kind of cute." With a hearty laugh, Yuri slapped his
son on the back. "The ladies, they always say so." Alex scooped up potatoes. "Thanks,
Papa." "Is good to be attractive to
women." He wiggled his brows at his wife. "Then, when you
pick one, she is helpless to resist." "I picked you," Nadia told
him, passing biscuits to Nick. "You were very slow. Like a bear
with, ah…" She struggled for the right word. "Soft
brains." She ignored Yuri's snort of objection. "He did not
come to court me. So I courted him." "Every time I turn, there she is.
In my way." When he looked at his wife, Bess saw memories and
more in his eyes. "There was no prettier girl in the village
than Nadia. Then she was mine." "I liked your big hands and shy
eyes," she told him. Her smile was quick and lovely. "Soon
you were not so shy. But my boys," she added, turning the smile
on Bess, "they were never shy with the girls." "Why waste time?" On impulse,
Alex put a hand on Bess's cheek and turned her face to his. Her smile
was puzzled. Then surprise shot into her eyes as he covered her mouth
with his. Not a quick, friendly kiss, this, but a scaring one that
made her head buzz. She had no way of knowing that he'd
never kissed a woman not of his family at his mother's table. Nor
that by doing so, he was telling those he loved that this was the
woman. As the table erupted with applause,
Bess cleared her throat. "No," she managed. "Not a bit
shy." Nadia blinked back tears and raised her
glass. She understood what her son had told her and felt the
bittersweet pleasure that came from knowing the last of her children
had given his heart. "Welcome," she said to Bess. A little confused, Bess reached for her
glass as all the others were lifted. "Thank you." She
sipped, relieved when the chattering started again. How easy to fall in love with them, she
realized. All of them were so warm, so open, so comfortable with each
other. Her parents would never have had such a sweetly intimate
conversation at the table. Nor had they ever embraced her with the
verve and passion both Yuri and Nadia showed their children. Was this what she'd been missing all of
those years? Bess wondered. Had lacking something like this caused
her to be so socially clumsy as a child, and, making up for it, so
socially active as an adult? Still, what she had had, and what she
hadn't, had forged her into what she was, so she couldn't regret it.
Well, perhaps a little, she mused, falling unknowingly into the
family tradition by sneaking the dog bits of food under the table. It
was hard not to regret it a little when you saw how lovely it could
be to be part of such a solid whole. Absorbing everything, she glanced
around the table. And found Mikhail's eyes on her. This time she
smiled. "You're doing it again," she told him. "Yes. I want to carve you." "I beg your pardon?" "Your face." He reached out
to take it in his hand. The conversation continued around them, as if
he handled women at the dinner table regularly. "Very
fascinating. Mahogany would be best." Amused, she sat patiently while he
turned her face this way and that. "Is this a joke?" "Mikhail never jokes about his
work," Sydney commented, coaxing one more green bean into her
son. "I'm just surprised it's taken him so long to demand you
sit for him." "Sit?" She shook her head,
and then her eyes widened as it all came together. "Oh, of
course. Stanislaski. The artist. I've seen your work. Lusted after
it, actually." "You will sit for me, and I'll
give you a piece. You'll choose it." "I could hardly turn down an offer
like that." "Good." Satisfied, he went
back to his meal. "She's very beautiful," he said to Alex,
in such an offhand way that Bess laughed. "I'd say that Stanislaski taste
runs to the odd, but your wife proves me wrong." Mikhail brushed a hand over Sydney's
halo of auburn hair, stroked a finger down her classically lovely
face. "There are different kinds of beauty. You'll come to the
studio next week." "Don't bother to argue."
Sydney caught Mikhail's hand, squeezed it. "It won't do you a
bit of good." At the other end of the table, Rachel
winced. Nadia leaned closer, spoke gently. "How far apart?" Rachel gave a little sigh. "Eight,
ten minutes. They're very mild yet." "What's mild?" Zack glanced
at her, and then his mouth all but dropped to his knees. "Oh,
God, now? Now?" "Not this very minute." She
would be calm, Rachel told herself and took a deep, cleansing breath
to prove it. "I think you have time for some of Mama's cream
cake." "She's in labor." He gaped
across the table at his equally panicked brother. "We're not ready here." Nick
stumbled to his feet. "We're ready back at home. I'm supposed to
call the doctor, but I don't have the number." "Mama does," Rachel assured
her husband's younger brother. Then she lifted a hand to her
husband's. "Take it easy, Muldoon. There's plenty of time." "Time, hell. We're going now.
Shouldn't we go now?" Zack demanded of Nadia. She smiled and nodded. "It would
be best for you, Zack." "But, Mama—" Rachel's protest was cut off by Nadia's
gentle flow of Ukrainian, the gist of which had a great deal to do
with placating frightened husbands. "She should put her feet up,"
Mikhail announced. "This helped you, yes?" "Yes," Sydney agreed. "But
I think we should wait until she gets to the hospital." "Nine-one-one." Alex shoved
away from the table and sprang to his feet. "I'll call." "Oh, sit down." Rachel waved
an annoyed hand at him. "I don't need a cop." "An ambulance," he insisted. "I'm not sick, I'm in labor." "I take her in the truck."
Yuri was already up, prepared to lift his baby girl into his big
arms. "We get there very fast." While the men began to argue in a
mixture of languages, Nadia rose quietly and went into the kitchen to
call Rachel's obstetrician. "I've already been through this,"
Mikhail was saying to Alex. "I know how to handle it." "Ha." Their father pushed
them both aside and pounded a fist on his broad chest. "Me, four
times. You know nothing." "We don't have the tape recorder
or the music." Nick ran a hand through his flow of sandy hair.
He was desperately afraid he'd be sick. Though no one was listening
to him, he continued to babble. "The video camera. We've got to
get the video camera." "Honey, you want some water? You
want some juice?" When she yelped, he turned dead white.
"Another one? It hasn't been ten minutes, has it?" "You're breaking my hand."
Rachel shook it free and sent a pleading look to Sydney. "Okay, guys, back off." The
steel under velvet that made Sydney a successful businesswoman
snapped into her voice. "Alex, go upstairs and get your sister a
pillow for the ride. Yuri, go start the truck. That's a very good
idea. Nick, you, Mikhail and Griff go back to your apartment and get
what Rachel needs. We'll meet you at the hospital." "How do you get there?"
Mikhail demanded. "I have a car." Bess was
watching the family drama with fascinated eyes. "We can fit
three in a pinch." "Wonderful." Dispersing the
troops with all the flair of a general, Sydney gave her husband a
kiss and a shove. "Get going. Zack and Nadia will ride with Yuri
and Rachel. I'll go with Alex and Bess." As the next contraction hit, Rachel
began to breathe slowly, steadily. "Sorry," she said to
Bess in between breaths, "to put you out." "No problem." She had to bite
her tongue to prevent herself asking what it felt like to go into
labor at a family dinner. There'd be time for that later. "I called the doctor, and
Natasha." Nadia came back into the room, pleased that Sydney had
organized the troops. "Natasha and her family are coming." "We should go." Zack helped
Rachel to her feet and swallowed hard. "Shouldn't we go?" By the time they arrived at the
hospital, Sydney and Bess were the best of friends. It was difficult
to be otherwise, when they'd been crammed together in one seat while
Alex drove like a madman back to Manhattan. They talked about clothes, a few mutual
friends they'd discovered, and the Stanislaski men. Sydney agreed
that it was very forbearing of Bess not to mention the quality of
Alex's driving, after he'd been so critical of hers. By the time they found their way to the
maternity level, Rachel was already settled in a birthing room, Zack
had gotten over the first stages of panic, and Yuri was patting a
pocket full of cigars. "She's in the early stages,"
Nadia explained to them in the corridor, "Company is good for
her." Alex strode straight through the door,
but Bess hung back. "I-don't want to intrude," she said to
Nadia. "This is not intrusion. This is
family." Nadia cocked her head. "Are you uneasy with
childbirth?" "Oh, no. I couldn't be, after I've
written so many." Alex poked his head back out. "How'd
you research that, McNee?" "I did rounds with an
obstetrician." Her dimple winked out. "And found a few
mothers-to-be who didn't object to having me hang around during labor
and delivery. Have you ever seen one?" "No." His eyes changed. Just
like a man. "They, ah, show us films, just in case, but I've
never been at ground zero." "It's pretty great." She
laughed, perfectly able to read his thoughts. "Don't worry. I'll
hold your hand." They passed the time in the big, airy
birthing room telling stories, giving advice, joking with Zack once
Mikhail and Nick arrived with Rachel's things. Griff was happily
settled in with Zack's cook, Rio, so there was little to do but wait. When Rachel felt like walking, they
took turns leading her around the corridors, rubbing her back, making
small talk to take her mind off the discomfort between contractions. "I can see your mind working,"
Alex murmured to Bess. "'How can I use this?'" "It's ingrained." She
murmured her thanks when he passed her his cold drink. "Your
family," she said, glancing around the room. "I've never
known anyone like them. My parents—they'd be appalled to be
expected to take part in something like this." "It's our baby, too." She smiled and lifted a hand to his
cheek. "That's what I mean. You're all very special." "I'm glad you're here." As he
leaned over to kiss her, Yuri slapped him on the back. "Now all my children make babies
but you." He wiggled his brows at Bess. "You start soon,
yes?" "Papa…" Not sure how
to take Bess's chuckle, Alex rose and spoke, firmly and quietly, in
his mother tongue. "When I decide to make babies, I'll let you
know." "What decide?" Yuri gestured
toward Bess. "She's the one you want, isn't she?" "Yes." Now Yuri gestured expansively with both
hands. "Then?" "I have my reasons for waiting.
They're my reasons." Though the shake of Yuri's head was a
gesture of sadness, there was a twinkle in his eye. "How is it
all my children are so stubborn?" "How is it my papa is so nosy?" With a laugh, Yuri embraced Alex and
kissed both his cheeks. "Go take this pretty girl for a walk,
steal some kisses. Your sister will be some time yet." "That's advice I'll take." He
reached for Bess's hand and pulled her to her feet. "Come on,
let's get some air." "Alexi." Bess had to quicken
her pace to keep up with him. "Don't be angry with him. He
didn't mean to embarrass you." "Yes, he did, but I'm not angry
with him." "What were you two rattling on
about?" He punched the button for the elevator.
"You know, I don't think I'll teach you any Ukrainian. It comes
in too handy." "But it's—" "Rude," he finished for her,
grinning. "I know." By the time they came back again, Alex
had taken his father's advice to heart. Bess's head was still
spinning when they walked past the waiting room. It was Alex who
spotted Nick, pacing and smoking in the smoking lounge like the
cliche" expectant daddy. "How's it going, kid?" "It's been an awfully long time."
Nick's hand shook a bit as he lifted the cigarette to his lips. "I
mean, Sydney was only in a couple of hours for Griff. It's getting
really intense, and Rachel kicked me and the camera out. How come
they don't do something?" "I don't know a lot about it,"
Alex mused. "But I think babies come when they're ready." "It's only been a little more than
six hours." Bess moved in to soothe, touched that Nick should
have such deep concern for his sister-in-law. "Feels like six days," Zack
commented as he staggered in. He plucked the cigarette from Nick's
hand and took a deep drag. "She's swearing at me. I know what
some of those names are now, even if they aren't in English." "That's a good sign," Bess
assured him. "It means things are moving along." "She swore at the doctor, too."
With a sigh, he passed the cigarette back to Nick. "But she
didn't take a swing at him." "If she missed," Alex
commented, ''she must be in really bad shape." Wincing, Zack rubbed his shoulder. "She
didn't. I'd better get back." "Let's go give him some support,"
Alex began, but then he spotted a woman rushing off the elevator.
"Tash!" "Oh, Alex!" Bess watched the woman fly into the
waiting room, Gypsy hair flowing. There was concern in her eyes and
laughter on her lips as she swung into Alex's arms. "Alexi, how is Rachel?" "Swearing at her doctor and
punching Zack." "Ah." She relaxed instantly.
"That's good. Nick." She held out a hand for his. "Don't
look so worried. Your niece or nephew will be along soon. Spence is
parking the car. We were going to leave the children, but they were
so disappointed, we brought them. Freddie's looking forward to seeing
you." Nick brightened a bit. "How's she
doing?" "She's taller than me now, and so
pretty. Alex, where's Rachel?" "I'll take you. Oh, this is Bess." "Bess?" Natasha turned, one
hand still on her brother's arm. Of course, she'd heard about Bess.
West Virginia might be a fair distance from New York, but family
business traveled fast on phone wires. "I'm sorry. I didn't
realize." "That's all right. You've got a
lot on your mind." And then Bess said the first thing that came
to hers. "What fabulous genes you all have." Natasha's brows lifted. Then, below
them, her eyes lit with laughter. "Rachel said I would like you.
I hope we have time to talk before we leave town. I'm sorry to rush
off." "Don't worry about it. I think
Nick and I'll go to the cafeteria, rustle up some food for this
group." Three hours later, Bess had delivered
sandwiches and coffee, bounced Natasha's youngest daughter, Katie, on
her knee and introduced herself to Spence Kimball and helped him
entertain his very cranky son. She'd met Freddie and noted that the
pretty, pixielike teenager was deep in puppy love with Nick. As time dragged on, she added her
support when Mikhail pressured his very tired wife to rest in the
waiting room, took a few-minutes to interrogate some nurses to help
her beef up some hospital scenes and soothed Alex's nerves as his
sister's labor reached the final stages. "It won't be much longer." "That's what they said an hour
ago." They were standing in the waiting room.
Alex refused to sit. After a yawn and a good stretch, Bess wrapped
her arms around him. "She's fully dilated, and the baby
was crowning. The last glance I had of the fetal monitor showed a
really strong heartbeat. A fast one. I think it's a girl." "How do you know so much?" "Research." She settled her
head on his shoulder. "I was figuring earlier that I've
delivered twelve babies, including one set of twins. In a matter of
speaking." When her voice slurred, he tipped up
her chin. "You're asleep on your feet, McNee. I should have sent
you home." "You couldn't have pried me away." No, that was true, he realized. It was
just one more aspect to her beauty. "I owe you." "Then pay up." She lifted her
mouth, sighing into the kiss. "Mama." Though he'd enjoyed
watching his brother, Mikhail shot to his feet when he spotted his
parents in the doorway. "We have a new member of the
family." There were tears in Nadia's eyes and in Yuri's as he
stood with his arm tight around his wife. "What is it?" Nick and Alex
demanded together. "You will come see. They bring the
baby to the glass in a moment." "Rachel is resting." Yuri
dashed away a tear. "You will kiss her good night soon." They trooped out together, to wait by
the nursery window for the first glimpse. "I'm an uncle," Nick said to
Freddie. The girl's cheeks turned pink as he gave her a hard hug.
"Hey, there's Zack." He kept his arm around her as his
brother walked forward, holding a tiny bundle. The bundle was
squalling, and Zack was grinning from ear to ear. He held the baby up. Atop the curling
black hair was a bright pink bow. "It's a girl," Alex murmured,
and held Bess hard against him. "She's beautiful." "Man" was the best Nick could
do. "Oh, man." Overcome for a moment, he glanced down and
found himself looking at Freddie, who was still tucked under his arm.
He drew back, brushed a fingertip along her cheek and caught a tear
on the tip. "What's this?" "It's just so sweet."
Freddie's eyelashes were spiky and her eyes swam as she looked up at
him. He thought for a moment—an uncomfortable moment—that
it would be easy to drown in those eyes. "Yeah, it's great." He let
out a careful breath. She was his cousin, he reminded himself. Well,
a kind of cousin. And she was hardly more than a kid. "I, ah,
don't have a handkerchief or anything." "It's all right." Freddie
felt a drop roll down her cheek, but she didn't mind. After all,
these were the very best kind of tears. "Do you ever think about
having babies?" she asked with disarming candor. "Having—" Nick would
have stepped back then, way back, but the family was crowding him in.
"No," he said firmly, and made himself look away from her
damp, glowing face. "No way." "I do." She sighed and let
her head rest against his arm. Mikhail was whispering something to
Sydney that had her nodding and wiping away tears. Behind Freddie,
Natasha shifted Katie in her arms and turned to her husband. He had
one hand on Freddie's shoulder, and his sleeping son lay curved on
his own. "Every one is a miracle." He bent his head to kiss her damp
cheeks. "Just say the word anytime you decide you'd like another
miracle of our own." "I am a man blessed." Yuri
grabbed the closest body. It happened to be Bess's, and she found
herself whirled in a circle. "Two grandsons. Now three
granddaughters." He tossed Bess up. She came down laughing,
gripping his shoulders. . "Congratulations." She
pleased him enormously by kissing him firmly on the mouth.
"Grandpapa." "It's a good day." He reached
in his pocket. "Have a cigar."
Chapter 10
Contents - Prev/Next Rosalie considered herself an excellent
judge of people, and she had already decided Bess was one strange
lady. But she kept coming back. Sure, the money was good, Rosalie
thought as she sat drinking a diet soda in Bess's basement office.
And for a woman with a retirement plan, that had to be number one.
Yet it was more than making an extra buck that kept her taking the
trip up and across town several days each week. More, too, that kept
her hanging around after they finished what Bess liked to call
'consulting sessions.' Rosalie was human enough to get a
charge out of being connected, however remotely, to the entertainment
world. She couldn't deny that she'd been excited, awed and impressed
when she watched a couple of tapings. But there was another factor, a much
more basic one. Rosalie enjoyed Bess's company. Besides being a strange lady, Bess had
class. Rosalie didn't figure a person had to possess class to
recognize it in another. Class wasn't just a matter of
pedigree—though she'd discovered Bess had one. It was more than
having an old lady in the DAR, or an old man in Who's Who. It was
hazier than that. Though Rosalie couldn't quite come up with the
terms she wanted, she had recognized in Bess those rare and often
nebulous qualities, grace and compassion. She was procrastinating over taking the
trip back downtown by dawdling over her drink. Bess didn't seem to
mind if Rosalie hung around while she worked. In the few weeks since
they'd hooked up, Rosalie had noted that Bess worked hard and long.
Harder, in Rosalie's opinion, than she herself, or any of the other
ladies in her profession. Certainly Bess's hours were longer. It amused Rosalie to compare the two.
In fact, she and Bess had gotten into a very interesting discussion
on the similarities and differences between Bess's selling her mind
and Rosalie her body. What a kick that had been, Rosalie
thought now, while Bess typed and mumbled. Philosophical discussions
weren't the norm in Rosalie's world. The simple term she had not quite
grasped for their relationship was friendship. They had become
friends. "How late you gonna work?"
Rosalie asked, and Bess glanced up absently from the computer screen. "Oh… not much longer."
Her eyes were still slightly unfocused when she blew her hair away
from them. Brock was on the verge of seducing Jessica. "I just
had this idea for a little twist on a scene for tomorrow." She
smiled then. It was quick, and a little wicked. "Of course,
several members of the cast are going to want to murder me when I
toss this at them in the morning. But that's show biz." Rosalie took a drag on her cigarette.
"What time did you get in here this morning?" "Today? About nine-thirty. I was…"
She thought of Alex. "Running a little late." Lips pursed, Rosalie looked at the fake
designer watch on her wrist. "And it's after seven now."
Her grin flashed. "Girlfriend, you'd only put in half that many
hours in my line of work."' "Yeah, but I get to sit down."
Bess rubbed at the dull ache in the back of her neck. She really was
going to have to work on her posture. "Hungry?" she asked.
"Want to order something in?" With a little tug of regret, Rosalie
stabbed out the cigarette. "No. I gotta get to work, too." "You could take the night off."
Casually Bess ran a finger lightly over the keyboard. "Maybe we
could catch a movie." Chuckling, Rosalie dug in her purse for
a mirror to check her makeup. "You said you weren't going to try
to reform me." "I lied." Bess sat back in
her chair while Rosalie painted her mouth bloodred. She'd tried very
hard not to pontificate, not to pressure, not to preach. And thought
she had succeeded. But she hadn't tried not to care. That would have
been useless. "I really worry about you. Especially since the
last murder." The odd twisting in Rosalie's stomach
had her shifting her eyes from her compact mirror to Bess. She
couldn't remember if anyone had ever worried about her before.
Certainly not in years. "Didn't I tell you I could take care of
myself?" "Yes, but—" "No buts about it, honey."
With a second dip into her purse, Rosalie pulled out a stiletto. One
flick of the wrist, and the long, razor-sharp blade zipped out. "What
I can't handle, this can." Bess managed to close her mouth, but
her eyes stayed riveted to the knife. In the overhead lights, it
gleamed silver, bright as sudden death. She couldn't say it was
elegant. But it was fascinating, deathly fascinating. "Can I?" With a shrug of her shoulders, Rosalie
passed the weapon to her. "Don't mess with the blade," she
warned. "It's as sharp as it looks." Bess took a good grip on the handle,
twisting her wrist this way and that, like a fencer. She wondered if
Jade/Josie might carry one. She was already imagining a scene where
the tormented Jade found the knife—maybe with the blade smeared
with blood—in one of her practical handbags. No, her briefcase.
Better. "Have you ever—" "Not yet." Rosalie held out a
hand to take it back. "But there's always a first time."
She pressed the button, and the blade whisked away again. "So
don't loose any sleep over me." After dropping the weapon back
into her bag, she took out an atomizer and sprayed scent generously
on her skin. The air bloomed with roses. "Couple more months,
I'll have enough put away. I'm going to be spending the winter in the
Florida sunshine while you slog through duty snow." She rose,
tugging her tight off-the-shoulder top provocatively down, so that
the rise of her breasts swelled invitingly over it. "See you
around." "Wait." Bess scrambled
through her own purse and came up with her mini recorder. "If it
won't bother your ethics, I thought you might use this." At
Rosalie's wry glance, Bess's cheeks heated. "I don't mean to
record that part. Just the streets, conversations with the other
women, maybe a couple of, ah… transactions." "You're the boss." Taking the
recorder, Rosalie slipped it away. "Be careful," Bess added,
though she knew Rosalie would laugh. She did, sending a last cocky look over
her bare shoulder. "Girlfriend, I'm always careful." Still chuckling, Rosalie headed down
the narrow corridor toward the freight elevator. She was already
picturing the way Bess's eyes would pop out when she listened to the
tape and discovered that her "consultant" had recorded everything. The prospect of pulling
such a fine joke had her grinning as the doors slid open. Her
amusement died a quick death when Alex walked off. While they eyed each other with mutual
suspicion, Alex pressed two fingers to the Door Open button. "How's
the moonlighting going, Rosalie?" "It passes the time." When she started past him, he raised an
arm to block the elevator opening. "What do you know about
Crystal LaRue?" "I know she's dead." Rosalie
fisted a hand on her hip, cocked it. "Something else you want?" Alex let her see that her snide
invitation only amused him. "What do you know about her before
she was dead?" "Nothing." She would have
given him the same answer if she'd been Crystal's most intimate
friend, but as it was, she was telling the simple truth. "I
never met her. Heard she was new, didn't have a man yet." "Now, I heard that, too,"
Alex said conversationally. "And I heard that Bobby wanted to
make her one of his wives." "Maybe. Bobby likes to start them
young." Alex struggled with his disgust. She'd
been seventeen, he thought. A runaway who hadn't know the rules and
would never have a chance to learn them. "Did Bobby roust her,
put on the pressure?" "Can't say." "Can't say? Or won't?" Rosalie opened the hand on her hip and
began to drum her fingers there. "Listen, I don't know what
Bobby did. I've been keeping out of his way lately." Saying nothing, Alex studied her face.
The bruising had faded. "Seems to me Bess is paying you enough
that you could stay out of his way altogether." "That's my business." "And hers," Alex said evenly.
"I don't want him finding out about this sideline of yours and
going after her." His eyes were cold and passionless. "Then
I'd have to kill him." "You think I'd turn Bobby on to
her?" Arrogance was sidelined as fury snapped into Rosalie's
voice. "I owe her." "What?" "Respect," she said, with an
innate and graceful dignity that had Alex softening. "She had me
eat at her table. She even said I could stay in her extra bedroom.
Like a guest." Her lips thinned at Alex's expression. "Don't
sweat it, honey. I didn't take her up on it. Sure, she's paying me,
and maybe you don't think that's any different than me taking money
from some slob off the street. But she treats me like somebody. Not
some thing, somebody." Embarrassed by her own vehemence, she
shrugged. "She doesn't have the sense not to." "She's got sense, all right. Not
all good." Alex's lips twitched, even as Rosalie's did. "Maybe
she hasn't gone so wrong here. I just don't want her hurt." "Neither do I." Rosalie
tapped a scarlet nail on his chest. "You got a bad case, cop.
Stars in your eyes." The little wisp of envy came and went,
almost unnoticed. "Make sure you keep them in hers, or you'll
answer to me." His grin flashed before he could
prevent it. The charm of it nearly had Rosalie changing her mind
about cops. "Yes, ma'am." Like Bess, he wanted to say
something that would stop her from going back on the streets. Unlike
Bess, he accepted that there was nothing that would do it. "Maybe I see why she's so stuck on
you." When he moved his blocking arm, she stepped into the
elevator, turned. "You be good to her, Stanislaski. She deserves
good." The elevator doors clunked shut. Alex
stood studying them a moment before he turned and wandered down the
corridor to find Bess. She was bent over the keys, rapping out
a machine-gun fire of words onto the monitor. Her fingers moved like
lightning, but her eyes were far away. In Millbrook, he thought,
smiling to himself. She had her legs crossed under her, up
on the chair. The way her shoulders were hunched, he imagined her
muscles would complain loudly the moment she came back to earth. She was wearing a skirt again, a little
leather number in bold blue that was hiked high up on her thighs. The
hot-pink blouse she'd tucked into it should have clashed with her
hair, but it didn't. The blouse looked like silk and was carelessly
shoved up to her elbows. A half-dozen gold bracelets clanged at her
wrist as she worked. Rings flashed on her fingers, and the big Gypsy
hoops she wore at her ears peeked out of her tousled hair. His heart ached with love for her. And
his loins… Alex let out a little breath. He wanted, quite
simply, to devour her. Inch by delicious inch. What the hell was he going to do, he
wondered, when she tried to slither out of his life? He was sure she
would, as she'd done with others before. He could lock her up, carry
her off. He could beg or threaten. He already knew he would do
whatever he had to in order to keep her in his life. What had ever made him think he would
one day find some nice, pretty woman with simple tastes and a quiet
style? Someone who would be content to sit home while he worked his
crazy hours? Who would have and help him raise the houseful of
children he so badly wanted? With Bess, nothing was simple, nothing
was quiet. She would never be content to sit home but would badger
him incessantly, picking at him until he gave in and talked about the
darker aspects of his work, those pieces of his life that he wanted
to keep locked away from everyone who mattered. As for children…
He didn't know how the devil to get and keep a ring on her finger,
much less ask her to help make a family. Being in love with her left him
helpless, made him stupid, brought him a kind of fear he'd never
faced as a cop. Not fear for his life. Fear for his heart. He could only take his own advice and
leave things as they were. Handle each day until she was so used to
him she'd want to stay. As he watched, she stopped typing,
lifted a hand to her neck for a quick, impatient rub. Her skirt hiked
higher as she shifted. It took all his control not to lick his lips.
She punched a few buttons, had the machine clicking. A moment later,
the printer beside her began to hum. With a smile on his face and lust in
his heart, Alex closed the door quietly at his back. Locked it. She jumped like a rabbit when his hands
came down on her shoulders. "Didn't anyone ever teach you to sit
in a chair?" "Alexi." She pressed a hand
to her galloping heart. "You scared—Oh…" Her
sigh was long and heartfelt as he massaged away the aches. "That's
wonderful." "You're going to do permanent
damage if you keep sitting like that all day." "I was planning on soaking in a
hot tub for two or three days." She leaned into his hands. "Where's Lori?" "She wasn't feeling too terrific."
As the printer continued to rattle, Bess closed her eyes. "I
told her I was leaving, too. Then I snuck back. I wanted to make a
few changes for tomorrow." She brought her hand up to one of
his, skimming her fingers over it to the wrist. "You said you
might have to work late." "Lead fizzled. We'll work on
tracing the heart necklace down, but that's better during business
hours." "Trace it down?" "Hit the jewelers," he
explained, "see if we can track down to when it was bought. Long
shot, but…". "Do you think the heart has a
personal meaning for him?" "Like some woman broke his heart,
so he gives them a symbol of it before he whacks them?" He gave
a little grunt as he continued to knead her muscles. "It's a
little too obvious to dismiss. Psychiatric profile figures him as
sexually inadequate on a normal level, so he pays for women to
perform. He wants them and detests himself for that, as much as he
detests them for being available. The fact that he goes through a
short courtship routine shows that—" He broke off as she
reached for a pad. "Hold on, McNee." He gave her shoulders
a hard squeeze. "I don't know how you do it. One minute I'm
thinking about getting you out of these clothes and the next you've
got me talking about a case." He pressed a kiss to the top of
her head. "No notes." Her fingers retreated from the pad, but
with obvious reluctance. "I like hearing you talk about your
work. I want you to be able to talk to me about anything." "Apparently I can. Even the stuff
I don't want you to hear. I've got a problem with you, Bess. You
won't let me tuck you into that nice safe comer where I want you to
be." "You only think that's where you
want me to be." Smiling, she tugged his hand around so that she
could kiss it. "You like me right where I am." Turning his
hand over, she pressed her lips to his palm. "I'm going to stay
there." She felt his fingers tense, then relax
slowly as he spread them over her cheek. "I was watching you
while you worked." A rippling thrill raced through her at
the words and at the shimmer of desire she heard in them. "Were
you?" "And thinking." His hands
slid down over her breasts, sampled their weight, molded them.
"Fantasizing." Her head fell back against the chair.
Her breathing quickened. "About?" "The things I'd like to do with
you." Through layers of silk, he caught her nipples, tugging
gently. "To you." When she tried to shift in the chair to
face him, he increased the pressure, held her still. Her dazzled eyes
focused on the monitor. She could still see the ghost of herself
there, and his hands moving. Sliding. Stroking. Impossibly erotic to see, and to feel.
Dry-mouthed, she watched his fingers undo her buttons and saw the
dark shadow of his hair as he pressed a hot mouth to her throat. She
lifted a hand, hooked it around his neck as she tilted her head to
offer more. "I can shut down in thirty
seconds." He bit her lightly, just above the
collarbone. "I'm not going to give you a chance to shut down." She laughed shakily, even as she lifted
her other arm to capture him in a reverse embrace. "I meant the
computer." He would have laughed himself, but he'd
stopped breathing. "I know what you meant." "But I—" He slipped a
hand under her skirt, and it was so sudden, so searing. Before she
could gasp out in shock, he had driven her ruthlessly to the peak. "I watched you." Each word
burned his throat as she poured into his hand. "I wanted you."
Half demented, he whipped her up again, pressing his face into her
neck as her body shuddered, shuddered. "Do you remember the
first time I found you here?" "What?" She couldn't remember
her own name. There was only this need he was ruthlessly building
inside her again. "Alexi, please. Come home with me. I need—"
This time she cried out as the third high, hard wave swamped her. "I wanted you then." In one
violent move, he spun her chair around and dragged her to her feet,
and her already weakened system went limp at what she read in his
face. "Let me show you exactly what I wanted." This wasn't the smooth and patient
lover of the night before. This man with the fierce eyes and bruising
hands wouldn't cuddle her and whisper exotic endearments. This was
the warrior she'd only glimpsed. He would plunder. Whether or not she
was ready, he was showing her that dark, reckless side of him that he
kept so tightly controlled. In the moment when he stared at her,
the look in his eyes hot and concentrated, she understood that
excitement took a twist into the primitive when it carried a touch of
fear. He fisted a hand in her hair and yanked
her against him. His body was like rock, vibrating from deep within,
as if from an erupting volcano. For that moment, there was only the
strength and the fury of the inevitable. His mouth burned over hers, his tongue
diving deep, while his free hand tugged the snap of her skirt free.
He wanted her flesh, craved it. That heated silk, those alluring
curves and taut muscles. Time and place had lost all impact. There
was only here. Only now. Only her. Shivery fingers of fear ran up her
spine. She hadn't known what it was to be wanted this way. It was so
huge, so violent, so glorious. Before, he had given her more than she
had ever dreamed of. Now, he seemed compelled to give her more than
she had ever dared dream. Beside them, the printer stopped its
practical clatter and dropped into a hum. The low, waiting sound was
drowned out by the thundering of her heart. The bright working lights
overhead seemed to dim as he took her hips and pressed her hard
against him. "You make a war inside me,"
he muttered as his teeth scraped roughly down her throat. "There's
no end to it. No peace from it. Say my name. I want to hear you say
my name." "Alexi." When his lips
crushed down on hers again, he felt her breathe it, warm, into his
mouth. "Take me. Now." The wild need slammed into her so that
her mouth was as turbulent, her hands as frantic. Dozens of tiny
explosions burst inside her body, merging into one huge tumult of
sensation that battered, bruised and bewitched. She was all but
sobbing with it as she tugged and pulled at his clothes. She was quivering for him. Couldn't
stop. The power and pressure growing inside her was all but
unbearable. And the heat, the furnace blast of heat, had her skin
slicked and her head spinning. Glorying in it, she brought her mouth
to his bare shoulder, savoring the taste of flesh. His busy, bruising
hands had her bearing down with teeth and nails. His breath hissed in
her ear as she reached down to curl impatient fingers around him. Confused and tangled phrases whirled in
his mind. He heard them burst from his lips to hang on the thick air
as he fought to catch his breath. On an oath, he gripped her
shoulders and hauled her back. Her face was flushed, her eyes were
glowing. He'd marked that ivory skin. He could see where his fingers
had pressed, where his roughened cheeks had scraped. But the part of
him that would have been shocked by his lack of care was far
overshadowed by a dark and desperate desire to conquer, to consume.
To mate. He saw them now as brands, signs that
made her his. Only his. With a jerk of his head, he tossed his
hair back. The way it swayed and settled had new emotion burning her
throat. Naked, muscles bunched as if to fight, he looked so
magnificent he dazzled her eyes. Then he looked at her, and the smile
that had nearly formed on her face froze into wonder. "No one makes you feel like this
but me." His accent had thickened, and the sound
of it sent chills along her heated skin. She could only shake her
head. "No one touches you like me."
He took his hands from her shoulders and gripped the bodice of her
chemise. "No one has you, ever again, but me." "Alexi—" But he shook his head. He could feel
her heart pounding under his hands, and his own chest was heaving.
"Understand me. You're mine now." Her eyes widened with
shock as he jerked his hands and ripped the chemise in half. "All
of you." He pushed her back against the table,
watching the play of stunned excitement over her face. Yes, he wanted
to excite her. And shock her. Stagger her. His fingers dug into her hips as he
lifted her. He was braced, straining like a stallion at the bit.
"Hold on to me," he demanded, but her fluttering hands slid
off his sweat-slick arms. His breath heaved out, his fingers dug into
her smooth, taut flesh. "Hold!" She met his eyes then, and felt that
wild whip of power. Drunk on it, she gripped his hair and wrapped her
legs around him. When he plunged inside her, her body arched back,
absorbing that first rocketing flash of heat. It was like being
consumed from the inside out. She felt the cool surface of the table
against her back first, then his weight on her. Greedy for more, she
tightened around him, matching his fast, frantic rhythm, dragging his
mouth back to hers so that they could echo the intimacy with their
tongues. He lost himself. There was only her
now, and the need to possess her. The desperate craving to be
possessed by her. Images reeled through his brain, all dark and
sharp-edged, until he thought he would go mad. And went mad. In a frenzy of movement, he dragged her
farther onto the table, crushing papers, knocking aside empty cups,
scattering pencils. He couldn't take his eyes from her face, the way
her eyes clouded, like fog over moss, the way her lips trembled with
each gasping breath. There was a bloom on her skin now, a rose under
glass. He was hammering himself into her, empowered by a rabid fury
of emotion that had its razor-tipped fingers around his throat. Too much, she thought frantically.
Never enough. The harsh overhead lights fractured into rainbows that
blinded her eyes. They seemed to arch around his head, but she didn't
think of angels. His eyes were so dark, so fiercely focused. Even as
her own grew leaden, she refused to close them. Oh, to watch him wanting her. Taking
her. She couldn't understand the words he
murmured, over and over again. But she understood what was in those
eyes. They were tearing each other apart, and they couldn't stop. The
animal had taken over, and it had diamond-sharp claws and jagged
teeth. There was nothing left but the sound of
their mixed labored breathing, the solid slap of flesh against flesh,
and the heady scent of hot, desperate sex. She felt his body go rigid, felt the
rippling muscles in the arms she gripped turn to stone. He groaned
out her name as his eyes sharpened like daggers. When he poured
himself into her, she cried out in triumph, then again in wonder as
he drove her over that crumbling edge with him. The strength that had screamed through
him switched off like a light, and he collapsed, panting, his full
weight on her. Fighting for breath, he wallowed in her hair, drawing
in the scent of it and the fragrance they'd made together. He
couldn't find his center, the focus that was so vital for survival.
He no longer had one without her. God, he could feel her vibrating
beneath him, shuddering from the aftershocks. And there were tears
mixed with the dew of sweat on her face. With breath still burning his lungs, he
levered himself on his elbows and shook his head to try to clear it.
At the movement, she made a small, whimpering sound in her throat
that both aroused and dismayed. Trying to find the gentleness that
had always been so easy for him, he shifted their positions and began
to stroke her hair, her shoulders, her back. Murmuring apologies, he cradled her
like a child. "Milaya, I'm sorry. I hurt you. I must have hurt
you. Don't cry." "I'm not crying." But, of
course, she was. He could feel the tears fall even as she ran kisses
over his face and throat. "Just tell me you love me. Please tell
me you love me." "I love you. Shh." He covered
her mouth tenderly with his. "You know I love you." "I love you." She pressed
those wet, shaky kisses to his cheeks, to his jaw. "You have to
believe that I love you." A hot fist clenched in his gut, but he
kept his hands gentle. "Just let me hold you." Tearing up again, she pressed her face
to his shoulder. "Even now you don't believe me. Alexi, what
more can I do?" "I believe you." But they
both knew he said it only to comfort. "You belong to me. I
believe that." "You're everything I want."
She relaxed against him, satisfied that he would take that much. "No more tears?" "No." He tilted her chin up to search her
face. "How badly did I hurt you?" "I don't think the results will be
in for days." She smiled a little. "How badly did I hurt
you?" His eyes narrowed, and her smile
widened. "You're not… upset?" "About what?" "I was an animal." With a
hand that had yet to steady, he brushed her tumbled hair out of her
face. "I took you on a table like a lunatic." "I know." After one long,
satisfied sigh, she slid her body lazily over his. "It was
wonderful." "Yes?" Guilt began to turn to
pride. "You liked it?" After being so thoroughly ravished, it
wasn't difficult to stroke his ego. "It was like being dragged
off by some barbarian. I couldn't even understand what you were
saying. It was exciting." She kissed his cheek. "Frightening."
And the other. "It was also the most erotic experience of my
life." "You were crying." "Alexi." She touched a hand
to his face. "You didn't just overpower me. You overwhelmed me.
No one's ever made me feel more wanted. More irresistible." "I can't resist you, but I'm sorry
I put bruises on you." "I don't mind—under the
circumstances." After another luxurious sigh, she glanced around
the room. "I don't know how I'll ever work in here again,
though." Now he grinned, wickedly. "Maybe
it'll inspire you." "There is that." She shifted
to straddle him and watched his sleepy eyes skim down to her breasts
and back. Possibilities, she thought. There were definite
possibilities in that look. "Being a cop, I imagine you've been
through arduous physical training." The possibilities had occurred to him,
as well. "Absolutely." "And you'd probably have amazing
recuperative powers." His brow lifted. "Under the right
conditions." "Good." To be certain she
created them, she ran her hands over his still-gleaming chest. With a half laugh, he caught her
wrists. "McNee, wouldn't you rather pick this up in bed?" For an answer, she leaned over, letting
her lips hover a breath away from his. The tip of her tongue darted
out to trace the shape of his mouth, to dip teasingly inside, then
retreat. Slowly, she tilted her head. Softly, she tasted his lips.
Achingly, achingly, she deepened the kiss. "Does that give you a clue,
Detective?"
Chapter 11
Contents - Prev/Next "I can't believe you want to spend
the best part of a Saturday morning in a sweaty gym." Alex was
stalling, even as he walked with Bess up the iron steps that led to
Rocky's. , "It's your sweaty gym," Bess
said, and kissed him. The past few days had been almost like
a honeymoon, she thought. If she took out the hours they'd both been
at work. But they'd made the most of what time they'd had together,
snuggling on the couch in her place, cooking a meal in his, wrestling
in bed in both. She was starting to hope that he
believed she loved him. And, once he did, she wanted nothing more
than for them to take that next step. The step that would lead to an
authentic honeymoon, with all the trimmings. "You picked me up at my gym
yesterday," she pointed out. "That wasn't a gym." There
was the faintest trace of a masculine sneer in his voice. "That
was an exercise palace. Fancy lighting, piped-in music. All those
mirrors." "At least I'll be able to see when
my butt starts to drop." He gave it a friendly pat. "I'll
let you know." "Do, and die," she said
smartly, and pushed through the frosted glass doors. She immediately thought of every bad
boxing film she'd ever seen. The huge room echoed with grunts and
slaps and thumps. It smelled of mildew and sweat and… She took
a testing sniff and decided she didn't want to know what else. There
were exposed pipes along the ceilings and walls, and there was a
hardwood floor that looked as though it had been gouged by spikes.
The boxing ring that was set up in one corner was already occupied by
two compact, dancing men in tiny shorts who were trying to pop each
other in the eye. A trio of punching bags hung at
strategic points. A half-naked man with a body like a cement truck
was currently trying to whip the tar out of one of them. Weights were being employed as well.
She watched tendons bulge and muscles bunch. They didn't worry about mirrors and
lighting here. Nor did she spot any of the high-tech equipment she
was accustomed to. This was down-and-dirty—squat, sweat and
punch. She sincerely doubted there would be a juice bar in the
vicinity, either. "Had enough?" Alex asked. He
was obviously amused at the thought of her stripping down to her
leotard and having a go with the boys. Bess closed her mouth, then answered
his grin with a cool stare. "I haven't even started yet." It was his turn to drop his jaw when
she peeled off her sweatshirt. Beneath she wore a snug, low-cut crop
top in zigzagging stripes of green and purple. As she shimmied out of
her baggy street shorts, he shoved the discarded shirt in front of
her. "Come on, Bess, put your clothes
on. Sweet Lord." The bottom half was worse. Over formfitting
tights she had on a teeny strip of spandex that covered little more
than a G-string. "You can't wear that in here." "Is it illegal?" She bent
over to stuff her sweats into her gym bag and heard the heavy thump
of weights as they were dropped. Maintaining position, she turned her
head and smiled at the pop-eyed man staring at her. The catcalls and whistles started
immediately, the sound swelling and bouncing off the cinder-block
walls. Alex was very much afraid there would be a riot—one he
was likely to incite himself. "Damn it, put something on before
I have to kill somebody." "They look harmless." She
straightened again and lifted her arms to tie the short curls at the
nape of her neck into a stubby ponytail. "Anyway, I came to work
out." With a challenging grin, she flexed a muscle. "How
much can you bench-press?" "McNee, don't you dare—"
He broke off with an oath as she blithely strolled across the room to
chat with the weight lifter. The two hundred pounds of muscle began
to babble like a teenager. Alex had no choice but to send out a
warning snarl, much as a guard dog might to a pack of encroaching
wolves, before he went after her. She pulled it off, of course. He should
have known she would. The men started out drooling, kicked over into
laughing and finally wound up competing with each other to show her
the proper way to perform squat lifts, chin-ups and leg curls. Before an hour was over, she'd been
shown pictures of wives and children, listened to sob stories over
sweethearts and stopped being ogled—unless it was at a discreet
distance. "You sure you want to do this?"
Alex asked again, tapping his gloved hands together. "Absolutely." She smiled at
Rocky as he himself laced up her gloves. "I couldn't leave
without one sparring match." "You watch out for his left—it's
a good one," Rocky advised her. "Kid could've been a
contender if he hadn't wanted to be a cop." She winked at Rocky. "I've got
fast feet. He won't lay a glove on me." Two of her new admirers held open the
ropes for her so that she could step into the ring. Enjoying the
sensation, she adjusted her padded helmet. "Aren't we supposed
to wear those funny retainers?" "The what—Oh, mouth guards?"
He couldn't resist, and he leaned over and kissed her to an
accompaniment of hoots. "Baby, I'm not going to hit you."
In a friendly gesture, he tapped his gloves to hers. "Okay, put
your hands up." When she did, lifting them toward the ceiling,
he rolled his eyes. "It's not an arrest, McNee." Patiently
he adjusted her hands until they were in a defensive position. "Now, you want to guard, see? Keep
your left up, keep it up. If I come in like this—" he did
a slow-motion jab at her jaw "—you block, jab back. That's
it." "And I fake with my left,"
she said, and did so. "If you want." Lord, she was
sweet. "Now try for here." He tapped his own chin. "Go
ahead, you don't have to pull it." "When she punched halfheartedly,
he shook his head. "No, you punch like a girl. Put your body
behind it. Pretend I'm Dawn Gallagher." Her eyes lit, and she swung full-out,
only to come up solidly against his block. "Hey, that's good."
Impressed, she swung again. "But I've got to move around, right?
Fake you out with my grace and fancy footwork." She did a quick boogie that had the
onlookers clapping and Alex grinning at her. "You got style.
Let's work on it." He was enjoying himself, showing her
the moves. And it certainly didn't hurt for a woman living in the
city to learn how to defend herself with something more than an
ammonia-filled water pistol. "It's fun." She ducked her
head as he'd shown her and tried two quick jabs with her left. "Always room for another
flyweight," Rocky called out to her. "Come on, Bess, body
blow." Chuckling, she aimed for Alex's
midsection and dodged his light tap toward her chin. "You look
so cute in gym shorts," she murmured. "Don't try to distract me." "Well, you do." She danced
around him again, and, laughing, he turned toward her. "Okay, that ought to—"
He ended on a grunt when she connected hard with his jaw and set him
down on his butt. "Oh, God." She crouched
instantly, battering his face with her gloves as she tried to stroke
it. "Oh, Alexi, I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?" He wiggled his jaw, sending her a dark
look. "Right cross," he muttered as men climbed through the
ropes to cheer and hold Bess's arms in the air. "I'm really sorry," Bess said
again as they started down the iron steps. But she was fingering the
little bit of tarnished metal Rocky had pinned—with some
ceremony—to her sweatshirt. "You said not to pull my
punches." "I know what I said." He'd be
lucky if he didn't have a bruise, Alex thought. And how the hell
would he explain that? "You only got through because I was
finished." She ran her tongue over her teeth and
stepped outside. "Uh-huh." "Don't get smart with me, McNee."
He snatched her up and swung her around. "Or I'll demand a
rematch." Wildly in love, she tossed her arms
around his neck. "Anytime." "Oh, yeah? How about…"
He trailed off with a grimace as his beeper sounded. "Sorry." "It's all right." She only
sighed a little as he tracked down a phone and called in. As she
stood beside him, watching his face, listening to his terse comments,
she realized that their plans for a picnic in the park and some
casual shopping were about to go bust. "You have your cop's face on,"
she said when he hung up. "Do you have to go in?" "Yeah." But he didn't tell
her they'd found another victim. It was bad enough that he was
spoiling their plans for the day. "It's probably going to take a
while. I'm really sorry, Bess." "Look." She framed his face
with her hands. "I understand. This is part of it." He brought those hands to his lips.
"I…" But he didn't tell her he loved her, because
she would echo the words, and it made him nervous to hear them. "I
appreciate it," he said instead. "And I'll make it up to
you." "Tell you what—why don't I
finish up what I have to do, then stop by the market? I'll make
dinner. Something that won't spoil if it has to be wanned up a couple
of times." Though his mind was already drifting
away from her, he managed a pained smile. "You're going to
cook." "I'm not that bad. I'm not,"
she insisted with a bit of a huff when he grinned. "I only
burned the potatoes the other night because you kept distracting me." "I guess it's the least I can do."
He kissed her lightly once, then again, longer. "I'll try to
call." "If you can." She waved him
off, then stood watching while he jogged down into the subway. With a
quick laugh, she spun around, hugging herself. She felt just like a cop's wife. "I hope you don't mind me dropping
by." "Of course not." Rachel took
a look at the bulging shopping bags in Bess's hands. "Been
busy?" "Whenever I get started with that
little plastic card, I can't seem to stop." She dumped her
purchases inside the apartment door. "You look wonderful. How
can you look wonderful less than a week after going through
childbirth?" "Strong genes." Pleased in
general, and with Bess in particular, Rachel kissed her on both
cheeks. "Come sit down." "Thanks. I—Oops." She
dipped into the bag and pulled out a gold foiled candy box. "For
Mom." "Oh." Rachel's eyes took on
the glow a woman's get when she looks at a lover—or a
five-pound box of exclusive chocolates. "I think you just became
my best friend." Chuckling, Bess dug into the bags
again. "Well, I know that people tend to drop by with baby
gifts." She held out a box wrapped in snowy white with bright
red lollipops scattered over it. "And, though I couldn't resist
the tradition, I figured you deserved something really sinful for
yourself." "I do." Rachel tucked the
baby box under her other arm. "It's really sweet of you, Bess,
and unnecessary. You and Alex already brought Brenna that wonderful
stuffed dragon." "That was from us. This is from
me. It's a girl thing. I saw this tiny little white organdy dress
with all these flounces and little pink bows and I couldn't resist." Rachel's new-mother's heart melted.
"Really?" "I figure in another year she
might want to wear motorcycle boots, so this may be your only chance
to play dress-up." "I swore that whatever I had, I
wouldn't make sexist decisions in dress or attitude." She sighed
over the box. "White organdy?" "Six flounces. I counted." "I can't wait to put her in it." "Ah, company.'' Mikhail strode out
of the bedroom with Brenna tucked in his arm. "Hello,
Aunt Bess." He kissed both of her cheeks, then her mouth. "You said you wouldn't wake her
up." This from Rachel, who was already leaning over to coo. "I didn't. Exactly. What's this?"
Recognizing the gold foil box, he flipped it open and dived in. "Mine," Rachel said in a
huff. "If you eat more than one, I'll break your fingers." "She was always greedy," he
said over the first piece. "Where's Alexi?" "He got called in." "Good. Now you have time to sit
down. I'll sketch you." "Now?" Womanlike, Bess lifted
a hand to her hair. "I'm not exactly dressed for it." "I want your face." Obviously
well used to making himself at home, he opened the drawer on an end
table and rummaged for a pad. "Perhaps I'll do your body later.
It's a good one." Her laugh was quick. "Thanks." "You might as well cooperate,"
Rachel told her, and crossed over to take the baby. "Once the
artist in htm takes over, you haven't got a chance." "I'm flattered, really." "There's no reason to be," he
said absently as he unearthed a suitable pencil. "You have the
face you were bom with." "Thank God that's not always
true." That caught his interest. "You had
it fixed?" "No. I just sort of grew into it." "Not there," he told her
before Bess could sit. "Over there, closer to the window in the
light. Rachel, when do I get the drink you promised me?" "On its way." She stopped
nuzzling Brenna long enough to look up. "What can I get you,
Bess?" "Anything cold—and a shot at
holding the baby." "I can accommodate you on both
counts." Rachel laid her daughter gently in Bess's arms. "She
hardly ever cries. And I think her eyes may stay blue. Like Zack's." "She's a beauty." Bess leaned
down to brush her lips over the curling dark hair and to draw in the
indescribably sweet scent of baby. "Like all of you." "Move," Mikhail ordered his
sister. "You're in my way." Shooting off a mild Ukrainian insult,
she headed for the kitchen. "Talk if you like." Mikhail
gestured with his pencil; and began to sketch. "It's one of my best things."
She'd already forgotten to be self-conscious. "Where's Sydney
and Griff?" "Griff has the sniffles." The
pencil was moving with quick, deft strokes over the pad. "Sydney
fusses over him, but she says I'm fussing over him and sends me out
on errands." "Which he does by coming by and
plaguing me," Rachel called out. "She's happy to see me,"
Mikhail said. "Because she's lonely, with Zack and Nick over
checking on the progress of the new apartment." "Oh, that's right, you're moving."
Comfortable, Bess tucked up her legs. "Alexi mentioned it." "We need a bigger place. Of
course, it was supposed to be ready a month ago, but things never run
on time. I'll miss this one," she said, coming back in with a
tray of cold drinks. "And having Nick underfoot. But I imagine
he'll like having this place to himself." Bess reached for her drink with her
free hand, gently jiggling the baby with the other. "I guess he
had as big a crush on you as Freddie has on him." For a moment, Rachel only stared. Then
she let out her breath in a quiet laugh. "Alex said you saw
things." "Just part of the job." Rachel didn't consider herself a slouch
in the readingpeople department. "So, how big a crush do you
have on Alexi?" "The biggest." Bess smiled
and rubbed her cheek over Brenna's. "He thinks I'm flighty.
Fickle. But I'm not. Not with him." "Why would he think that?" "I have a varied track record. But
it's different with him." When Bess lowered her head to murmur
to the baby, Rachel glanced at her brother. They exchanged a great
deal without uttering a word. "It makes me envy people like your
sister, Natasha," Bess went on. "Those three beautiful
children, a husband who after years together still looks at her as if
he can't believe she belongs to him. Work she loves. I envy all
that." "You'd like a family?" "I never had one." Rachel knew it was the lawyer in her,
but she couldn't help moving along the line of questioning. "Does
it bother you that he's a cop?" "Bother me?" Bess's brows
lifted in surprise. "No. Do you mean, will I worry? I suppose I
will. But it's not something I could change, or that I want to
change. I love who he is." "He's making you sad,"
Mikhail said quietly. "No." Bess's denial was quick
enough to startle the dozing baby. She soothed her automatically as
she shook her head. "No, of course he isn't." "I see what's in your eyes." He would, she realized, and felt the
warmth creep into her cheeks. "It's only that I know he doesn't
trust me—my feelings. Or, I suppose, the endurance of my
feelings. It's not his fault." "He was always one to pick things
apart." There was brotherly disgust in Mikhail's voice. "Never
one to take anything on faith. I'll speak to him." "Oh, no." This time, she
laughed. "He'd be furious with both of us. All that Slavic pride
and male ego." Instantly Mikhail's eyes narrowed.
"What's wrong with that?" "Nothing." She grinned at
Rachel. "Not a thing. I'll just wear him down in my own way. In
fact, I'm going to start tonight. I'm cooking dinner. I thought maybe
I could call your mother, find out if he has a favorite dish." "I can tell you that," Rachel
offered. "Anything." "Well, that certainly widens my
choices. Do you think she'd mind if I called her, asked for some
pointers? My kitchen skills are moderate at best." "She'd love it." Rachel
smiled to herself, knowing her mother would hang up the phone and
immediately start planning the wedding. It was after midnight when Alex let
himself into Bess's apartment with the key she'd given him. He was
punchy with fatigue, and his head was buzzing from too much coffee.
Those were usual things, as much a part of his work as filing reports
or following a lead. But the sick weight in his stomach was something
new. He would have to tell her. She'd left the television on. In an old
black-and-white movie a woman screamed in abject terror and fled down
a moonlit beach. As he shrugged out of his jacket, Alex moved across
the room to switch it off. Before he reached the set, he saw her,
curled on the couch. She'd waited for him. The sweetness of
that speared through him as he crouched beside her. For so many years
now, he'd come home alone, to no one. Gently he brushed the dark red
curls from her cheek and replaced them with his lips. She stirred,
murmuring. Her eyes fluttered open. "I'm just going to carry you into
bed," he whispered. "Go back to sleep." "Alexi." She lifted a hand to
rub over the cheek he hadn't shaved that morning. Her voice was thick
with sleep, her eyes glazed with it. "What time is it?" "It's late. You should have gone
to bed." She made a vague sound of disagreement
and pushed up on one elbow. "I was waiting up, but the movie was
so bad." Her laugh was groggy, and she rubbed her eyes like a
child. "It zapped me." She circled her shoulders before
leaning forward to kiss him. "You had a long day, Detective." "Yeah." And maybe, because
she was half-asleep, he could put off the rest. "So have you.
I'll cart you in." "No, I'm okay." She sat up,
yawning. "Did you eat something?" "I caught a sandwich. I'm really
sorry, I tried to call." "And got the machine," she
said with a rueful nod. "Because I'd forgotten the paprika and
had to run back out to the market." "You cooked?" The idea both
touched him and accented his guilt. "I amazed myself." It felt
good to settle against him when he joined her on the couch and
slipped an arm around her. Cozy, right, and wonderfully simple. "Your
mother's recipe for chicken and dumplings—Hungarian-style." "Csirke paprikas?" Normally
it would have made his mouth water. "That's a lot of work." "It was a culinary adventure—and
the cleaning lady will probably quit on Monday, after one look at the
kitchen." She laughed up at him, then scrubbed her knuckles over
his cheek when she caught the look in his eyes. "Don't worry.
It'll heat up just fine for tomorrow's lunch. Then again…"
She snuggled closer. "If you're feeling really guilty, I'll take
you up on that ride to the bedroom—and whatever else you can
think of." But instead of chuckling and scooping
her up, he pushed away to pace to the television and snap it off. "We
have to talk." His tone had nerves skittering in her
stomach, but she nodded. "All right." He thought it might be best—for
both of them—if they had some of the brandy she had offered him
during an earlier crisis. Trying out the words in his head, he walked
to the lacquered cabinet. "It's bad," she murmured and
pressed her lips together, hard. Her first thought was that he had
changed his mind about her. That he had finally taken that good look
she'd been afraid of and realized his mistake. "It's bad," he concurred,
then brought the snifters to the couch. "Here. Drink a little." "It's all right. I don't make
scenes." He tilted the brandy toward her lips
himself. "Just a little, milaya." She closed her eyes and did as he
asked. He couldn't say that sweet word to her in that loving tone if
he'd changed his mind. "Okay." A deep breath, and she
opened her eyes again. "There was another murder last
night." "Oh, Alexi." Instantly the
image of Crystal LaRue's mangled body flashed behind her eyes. "Oh,
God." She caught his hand in hers and squeezed. "Last
night?" "The desk clerk found her this
morning. They had an arrangement. She only used that room for work,
and he was ticked that she hadn't checked out and slipped him his
usual tip." He was taking it slow, deliberately, so that the
general horror would pass before he hit her with the specifics. Again
he tipped the brandy up to her lips. "She'd rented the room
three times last night. He caught a glimpse of the third John when
they went up, so we've had him looking over mug shots most of the
day." "You'll catch him." "Oh, yeah. There's no doubt about
it this time. He didn't find the guy in the books, but he gave the
police artist a fair description. We'll be broadcasting it. This time
we should have his blood type, too. DNA. Couple of other things." "You'll have him soon." "Not soon enough. Bess, the
woman…" His fingers tightened on hers, but he told her
the worst as gently as he knew how. "It was Rosalie." She only stared, and he watched,
helpless, as the color simply slid out of her face. "No."
She was tugging her hand from his, but he only held tighter. "You're
wrong. You made a mistake. I just saw her. I just talked to her a
couple of days ago." "There's no mistake." His
voice toughened, for her sake. "I ID'd her myself. Rechecked
that with prints, and the desk clerk's ID. Bess, it was Rosalie." The moan came out brokenly as she
wrapped her arms around herself and began to rock. "Don't,"
she said when he tried to gather her close. "Don't, don't,
don't." She sprang up, needing the distance,
desperate to find something to do with the helpless rage that was
building inside her. "She didn't have to die. It isn't right. It
isn't right for her to die like that." "It's never right." It was his tone, the cool detachment of
it, that had her whirling on him. "But she was just a hooker.
Don't get involved, right? Don't feel anything. Isn't that what you
told me?" He went very still, as if she'd pulled
a gun and taken aim. "I guess I did." "I wanted to help her, but you
told me I couldn't. You told me it was a waste of my time and energy.
And you were right, weren't you, Alexi? How fine it must be to always
be so right." He took the blow. What else could he
do? "Why don't you sit down, Bess? You'll make yourself sick." She wanted to break something, to smash
it—but nothing was precious enough. "I cared, damn you. I
cared about her. She wasn't just a story line to me. She was a
person. All she wanted was to go south, buy a trailer." When her
breath began to hitch, she covered her mouth with her hands. "She
shouldn't have died like that." "I wish I could change it."
The bitter sense of failure turned his voice to ice. "I wish to
God I could." Before he realized the glass was leaving his hand,
he was heaving the snifter against the wall. "How do you know
what I felt when I walked into that filthy room and found her like
that? How the hell do you know what it's like to face it and know you
couldn't stop it? She was a person to me, too." "I'm sorry." The tears that
spilled over now spilled for all of them. "Alexi, I'm sorry." "For what?" He tossed back.
"It was the truth." "Facts. Not truth." He'd
tried to soften the blow, to cushion her when his own emotions were
raw. He'd needed to comfort. His eyes had been dazed with fatigue and
pain and the kind of grief she might never understand, but he'd
needed to shield her.'And she hadn't allowed it. "Hold me,
please. I need you to hold me." For a moment she was afraid he wouldn't
move. Then he crossed to her. Though his arms were rigid with
tension, they came around her. "I didn't mean to hurt you,"
she murmured, but he only shook his head and stroked her hair.
Grieving, she turned her face into his throat. "I wanted to make
it a lie somehow. To make you wrong so it could all be wrong."
She squeezed her eyes closed and held tight. "She was somebody." He stared blankly over her shoulder as
he remembered one of the last things Rosalie had said to him. She
treats me like somebody. "I know." "You'll catch him," she said
fiercely. "We'll catch him. We'll put him
away. He won't hurt anybody else." Though her words still
scraped against him, he rocked her. He would tell her the rest and
hoped it helped. "She had a knife." "I saw it. She showed me." "She used it. I don't know how bad
she hurt him, but she put up a hell of a fight. It's recorded." "Recorded?" Eyes dull with
shock, she leaned back. "My God. The tape. I gave her my mini
recorder." "I figured as much. For whatever
consolation it is, the fact that you did give it to her, and she
decided to use it, is going to make a difference. A big one." "You heard them," she said
through dry lips. "You heard—" "We got everything, from the deal
on the street until… the end. Don't ask me, Bess." He
lifted a hand to cup her face. "Even if I could tell you what
was on the tape, I wouldn't." "I wasn't going to ask. I don't
think I could bear to know what happened in that room." Calmer now, he searched her face. "I've
only got a few hours. I have to go in first thing in the morning. Do
you want me to stay with you tonight, or would you rather I go?" She'd hurt him more than she'd
realized. Perhaps the only way she could heal the wound was to admit,
and to show him, that she needed comfort. Needed it from him. Drawing
him close, she laid her head on his shoulder. "I want you with me, Alexi.
Always. And tonight—I don't think I'd make it through tonight
without you." She began to cry then. Alex picked her
up and carried her to the couch, where they could lie down and grieve
together.
Chapter 12
Contents - Prev Judd flexed his hand on the steering
wheel as he turned on West Seventy-sixth. He wasn't nervous this
time. He was eager. The idea of bringing Wilson J. Tremayne III—a
U.S. senator's grandson—in for questioning in the murders of
four women had him chafing at the bit. They had him, Judd thought. He knew
they had the creep. The artist's sketch, the blood type, the
voiceprint. It had been quick work on that, he mused. Flavored with
luck. Bess's tape had been one of those twisted aspects of police
work that never failed to fascinate him. It was Trilwalter who'd identified
Tremayne from the sketch. Judd remembered that the boss had taken a
long, hard look at the artist's rendering and then ordered Alex to
the newspaper morgue. The desk clerk had picked the reprint of
Tremayne's newspaper picture from a choice of five. From there, Alex had used a connection
at one of the local television stations and had finessed a videotape
of Tremayne campaigning for his grandfather. The lab boys had jumped
right on it, and had matched the voice to the one on Bess's tape. It still made him queasy to think about
what had been on that tape, but that was something he didn't want to
show to Alex. Just as he knew better than to let Alex spot his
eagerness now. "So," he said casually, "you
think the Yankees have got a shot this year?" Alex didn't even glance over. He could
all but taste his partner's excitement. "When a cop starts
licking his lips, he forgets things. Miranda rights, probable cause,
makes all kinds of little procedural mistakes that help slime ooze
out of courtrooms and back onto the street." Judd clenched his jaw. "I'm not
licking my lips." "Malloy, you'll be drooling any
minute." Alex looked over at the beautiful old building while
Judd hunted up a parking space. The Gothic touches appealed to him,
as did the tall, narrow windows and the scattering of terrace
gardens. Tremayne lived on the top floor, in a plush two-level condo
with a view of the park and a uniformed doorman downstairs. He came and went as he pleased, wearing
his Italian suits and his Swiss watch. And four women were dead. "Don't take it personally,"
Alex said when they got out of the car. "Stanislaski's rule
number five." But Judd was getting good, very good,
at reading his partner. "You want him as bad as I do." Alex looked over, his eyes meeting,
then locking on Judd's. There wasn't eagerness in them or excitement
or even satisfaction. They were all cold fury. "So let's go get
the bastard." They flashed their badges for the
doorman, then rode partway up in the elevator with a plump
middle-aged woman and her yipping schnauzer. Alex glanced up and
spotted the security camera in the corner. It might come in handy, he
thought. The DA would have to subpoena the tapes for the nights of
the murders. If they were dated and timed, so much the better. But,
if not, they would still show Tremayne going and coming. The schnauzer got off at four. They
continued on to eight. Side by side, they approached 8B. Though the door was thick, Alex could
hear the strains of an aria from Aida coming from the apartment. He'd
never cared much for opera, but he'd liked this particular one. He
wondered if it would be spoiled for him now. He rang the buzzer. He had to ring it a second time before
Tremayne answered. Alex recognized him. It was almost as though they
were old friends now that Alex had pored over the newspaper shots and
stories, the videotape. And, of course, he knew his voice. Knew it
when it was calm, when it was amused and when it was darkly, sickly,
thrilled. Dressed in a thick velour robe that
matched his china-blue eyes, Tremayne stood dripping, rubbing a thick
monogrammed towel over his fair hair. "Wilson J. Tremayne?" "That's right." Tremayne
glanced pleasantly from face to face. He didn't have the street sense
to smell cop. "I'm afraid you've caught me at a bad time." "Yes, sir." Never taking his
eyes off Tremayne's, Alex took out his badge. "Detectives
Stanislaski and Malloy." "Detectives?" Tremayne's
voice was bland, only mildly curious, but Alex saw the flicker.
"Don't tell me my secretary forgot to pay my parking tickets
again." "You'll have to get dressed, Mr.
Tremayne." Still watching, Alex replaced his shield. "We'd
like you to come with us." "With you?" Tremayne eased
backward a step. Judd noted that his hand eased down toward the
doorknob, closed over it. Knuckles whitened. "I'm afraid that
would be very inconvenient. I have a dinner engagement." "You'll want to cancel that,"
Alex said. "This may take a while." "Detective—?" "Stanislaski." "Ah, Stanislaski. Do you know who
I am?" Because it suited him, because he
wanted it, Alex let Tremayne see the knowledge. "I know exactly
who you are, Jack." Alex allowed himself one quick flash of
pleasure at the fear that leaped into Tremayne's eyes. "We're
going downtown, Mr. Tremayne. Your presence is requested for
questioning on the murders of four women. Mary Rodell." His
voice grew quieter, more dangerous, on each name. "Angie
Horowitz, Crystal LaRue and Rosalie Hood. You're free to call your
attorney." "This is absurd." Alex slapped a hand on the door before
Tremayne could slam it shut. "We can take you in as you are—and
give your neighbors a thrill. Or you can get dressed." Alex saw the quick panic and was braced
even as Tremayne turned to run. He knew better—sure he did—but
it felt so damn good to body-slam the man up against that
silk-papered wall. A small, delicate statue tipped from its niche and
bounced on the carpet. When he hauled Tremayne up by the lapels, he
saw the gold chain, the dangling heart with a crack running through
it that was the twin of the one they had in evidence. And he saw the
fresh white bandage that neatly covered the wounds Rosalie had
inflicted as she fought for her life. "Give me a reason." Alex
leaned in close. "I'd love it." "I'll have your badges."
Tears began to leak out of Tremayne's eyes as he slid to the floor.
"My grandfather will have your badges." In disgust, Alex stood over him. "Go
find him some pants," he said to Judd. "I'll read him his
rights." With a nod, Judd started for the
bedroom. "Don't take it personally, Stanislaski." Alex glanced over with something that
was almost a smile. "Kiss off, Malloy." They had him cold, Alex thought as he
turned into Bess's building. They could call out every fancy lawyer
on the East Coast, and it wouldn't mean a damn thing. The physical
evidence was overwhelming—particularly since they'd found the
murder weapon in the nightstand drawer. Opportunity was unlikely to be a
problem, and as for motive—he'd leave that up to the shrinks.
Undoubtedly they'd cop an insanity plea. Maybe they'd even pull it
off. One way or the other, he was off the streets. It went a long way toward easing the
bitterness he'd felt over Rosalie's death. He hoped it helped Bess
with her grief. He'd nearly called her from the
station, but he'd wanted to tell her face-to-face. As he waited for
the elevator, he shifted the bunch of lilacs he held. Maybe it was a
weird time to bring her flowers, but he thought she needed them. Stepping into the car, he tucked a hand
in his pocket and felt the jeweler's box. It was even a weirder time
to propose marriage. But he knew he needed it. It scared him just how much he'd come
to depend on having her with him. To talk to him, to listen to him,
to make him laugh. To make love with him. He knew he was rushing
things, but he justified it by assuring himself that if he got her to
marry him quickly enough, she wouldn't have time to change her mind. She believed she was in love with him.
After they were committed, emotionally and legally, he would take as
much time as necessary to make certain it was true. The elevator opened, and Alex dug for
his keys. They'd order in tonight, he decided. Put on some music,
light some candles. He grimaced as he fit the key into the lock. No,
she'd probably had that routine before, and he'd be damned if he'd
follow someone else's pattern. He'd have to think of something else. He opened the door with his arms full
of nodding lilacs, his mind racing to think of some clever,
innovative way to ask Bess to be his wife. The color went out of his
face and turned his eyes to midnight. He felt something slam into his
chest. It was like being shot. She was standing in the center of the
room, her laughter just fading away. In another man's arms, her mouth
just retreating from another man's lips. "Charlie, I—" She heard
the sound of the door and turned. The bright, beaming smile on her
face froze, then faded away like the laughter. "Alexi." "I guess I should have knocked."
His voice was dead calm. Viciously calm. "No, of course not." There
were butterflies in her stomach, and their wings were razor-sharp.
"Charlie, this is Alexi. I've told you about him." "Sure. Think I met you at Bess's
last party." Lanky, long-haired and obviously oblivious to the
tension throbbing in the air, he gave Bess's shoulders a squeeze.
"She gives the best." Alex set the flowers aside. One fragile
bloom fell from the table and was ignored. "So I've heard." "Well, I've got to be going."
Charlie bent to give Bess another kiss. Alex's hands clenched. "You
won't let me down?" "Of course not." She worked
up a smile, grateful that Charlie was too preoccupied to sense the
falseness of it. "You know how happy I am for you, Charlie. I'll
be in touch." He went out cheerfully, calling out a
last farewell before he shut the door. In the silence, Alex noticed
the music for the first time. Violins and flutes whispered out of her
stereo. Very romantic, he thought, and his
teeth clenched like his fists. "Well." Her eyes were burning
dry, though her heart was weeping. "I can see I should explain."
She walked over to the wine she'd poured for Charlie and topped off
her glass. "I can also see that you've already made up your
mind, so explanations would be pointless." "You move fast, Bess." She was glad she had her back to him
for a moment. Very glad, because her, hand trembled as she lifted the
wine. "Do you think so, Alexi?" "Or maybe you've been seeing him
all along." "You can say that?" Now she
turned, and the first flashes of anger burst through her. "You
can stand there and say that to me?" "What the hell do you expect me to
say?" he shot back. He didn't go near her. Didn't dare. "I
walk in here and find you with him. A little music, a nice bottle of
wine." He wished he had been shot. It couldn't possibly hurt
more than this bite of betrayal. "Do you think I'm an idiot?" "No. No, I don't." She needed
to sit, but she locked her knees straight. "But I must be to
have been so careless as to have an assignation here when you were
bound to find me out." Her eyes were like glass as she toasted
him. "Caught me." He took a step forward, stopped
himself. "Are you going to tell me you didn't sleep with him?" In the thrum of silence, the flutes
sang. "No, I'm not going to tell you that. I'm not ashamed that
I once cared enough for a very good man to be intimate with him. I'd
tell you that I haven't been with Charlie or anyone else since I met
you, but the evidence is against me, isn't it, Detective?" She was so tired, Bess thought, so
terribly tired, and the scent of the lilacs made her want to weep.
Rosalie's funeral had been that morning, and she'd quietly made the
arrangements herself. She'd gone alone, without mentioning it to
Alex. But she'd needed him. "You let him kiss you." "Yes, I let him kiss me. I've let
lots of men kiss me. Isn't that the problem?" She set down the
wine before she could do something rash, like tossing it to the
floor. "You didn't come to me a virgin, Alexi, nor did I expect
you to. That's one of the big differences between us." "There's a bigger difference
between a virgin and a—" He broke off, appalled with himself."
He wouldn't have meant it. Stumbling, horrified apologies whirled
through his head. But he could see by the way her head jerked up, the
way her color drained, that there would be no taking back even the
unsaid. "I think," she said in an odd
voice, "you'd better go." "We haven't finished." "I don't want you here. Even a
whore can choose." His face was as pale as hers. "Bess,
I didn't mean that. I could never mean that. I want to understand—" "No, you don't." She cut him
off, her voice so thick with tears that she had to fight for every
word. "You never wanted to understand, Alexi. You never wanted
to hear the one thing I needed you to believe. Now the only thing you
need to understand is that I don't want to see you again." He felt something rip apart in his gut.
"You can't have that." "If you don't leave now, I'll call
Security. I'll call your captain, I'll call the mayor."
Desperation was rising like a flood. "Whatever it takes to keep
you away from me." His eyes narrowed, sharpened. "You
can call God Almighty. It won't stop me." "Maybe this will." She
gripped her hands tightly together and looked just over his shoulder.
"I don't love you, I don't want you, I don't need you. It was
fun while it lasted, but the game's over. You can let yourself out." She turned away and walked quickly up
the stairs. There had been hurt in his eyes. If there had been anger,
she knew, he would have come after her, but there had been hurt, and
she made it to the bedroom alone. With her hands over her face, she
waited, biting back sobs, until she heard the door close downstairs.
With a sound of mourning, she lowered herself to the floor and tasted
her own tears. They were bitter. Impatient and unsympathetic, Mikhail
paced the floor of Alex's sparsely furnished apartment. "You
don't answer your phone," he was saying. "You don't return
messages." He kicked a discarded shirt aside. The apartment was
a shambles. "Lucky for you I came instead of Mama. She'd box
your ears for living like a pig." "I gave the staff the month off."
With the concentrated care of the nearly drunk, Alex poured another
glass of vodka from the half-empty bottle on the table. "And drinking alone in the middle
of the day." "So, join me." Alex gestured
carelessly toward the kitchen, where dishes were piled high. "Bound
to be a clean glass somewhere." Mikhail washed one out before coming
back to the table. He sat, poured. "What is this, Alexi?" "Celebration. My day off."
Alex took a swallow and waited for the vodka to join the rest
swimming through his system. "I caught the bad guy." With a
half laugh, he toasted himself. "And lost the girl." Mikhail drummed his fingers on the
table as he drank. It was no less than he'd expected. "You
fought with Bess?" "Fought?" Lips pursed, Alex
studied the clear, potent liquid in his glass. "I don't know
that's the term, exactly. Found her with another man." Mikhail's glass froze halfway to his
lips. "You're wrong." "Nope." Alex reached for the
bottle with an almost steady hand. "Walked in and found her
lip-locked to this guy she used to be engaged to. Bess has this hobby
of getting engaged." Mikhail merely shook his head.
Something was not quite right with this picture. "Did you kill
him?" "Thought about it." Before he
drank again, Alex ran his tongue over his teeth. Good, he thought.
They were nearly numb. The rest would follow. "Too damn bad I'm
a cop." "What was her explanation?" "Didn't give me one. Got pissed,
is all." He set the glass down so that he could use both hands
to rub his face. "Because you accused without
trusting." "I didn't accuse," Alex shot
back, then pressed his fingers to his burning eyes. "I didn't
have to. What I didn't say was unforgivable. She tossed me out on my
ear, but not before she told me she didn't love me anyway." "She lies." Before Alex could
lift his glass again, Mikhail grabbed his wrist. "I tell you,
she lies. A few days ago she visited Rachel and the baby. I made her
sit for me and sketched her while she talked of you. There's no
mistaking what I saw in her eyes, Alexi. You're blind if you haven't
seen it yourself." He had seen it, and the pain of
remembering what he'd seen clawed through him so that he stumbled to
his feet as if to escape it. "She falls in love easily." "So? There is love, and love. How
many times have you taken the fall?" "This is the first." "For this kind, yes. There were
others." "They were different." "Ah." Patient and amused,
Mikhail held up a finger. "So it's okay for you to play with
love until you find the truth, but it's not okay for Bess." "It's—" Put that way,
it was tough to argue with. Especially when his head was reeling.
"Damn it, I was jealous. I have a right to be jealous." "You have a right to make an ass
of yourself, too." Pleased, now that he knew it could be
fixed, Mikhail lucked back and crossed his booted feet. "Did
you?" "Big-time." Alex swayed, then
sat down heavily. "I was going to ask her to many me, Mik. I had
the ring in my pocket and these stupid lilacs. I was scared to death
she'd say yes. More scared that she'd say no." He propped his
spinning head in his hands. "What the hell was she doing kissing
that son of a bitch?" "Maybe if you had asked nicely,
she would have told you." With a lopsided grin, Alex turned his
bleary eyes on his brother. "Would you have asked nicely?" "No, I would have broken his arms,
maybe his legs, too. Then I would have asked." With a sigh,
Mikhail patted Alex's shoulder. "But that is me. You were always
more impulsive." "We could go find him." Alex
considered and, warming to the idea, leaned over to give Mikhail a
sloppy hug. "We'll go beat him up together. Like old times." "We'll try something different."
Rising, Mikhail hauled Alex to his feet. "Where we going?" "I'm going to put you in a cold
shower until your head's clear." Alex staggered and linked an arm around
his brother's neck. "What for?" "So you can go find your woman and
grovel." Unsure of his footing, Alex stared at
the tilting floor. "I don't wanna grovel." "Yes, you do. It's best to get
used to it before you marry her. I have more experience in this." "Oh, yeah?" Enjoying the idea
of his big brother crawling at Sydney's feet, he grinned as Mikhail
thrust him, fully clothed, into the shower. "Can I watch next
time?" "No." With immense
satisfaction, Mikhail turned the cold water on full and listened to
his brother's pained shout bounce viciously on the tiles. "This
is a very good start," he decided. "You son of a bitch." They
were both laughing when Alex grabbed Mikhail in a headlock and
dragged him under the spray. He was nearly sober by the time he
walked into Bess's office, but he wasn't laughing. It was hard to
laugh when your throat was thick with nerves. He was going to be reasonable, he
promised himself. They would discuss the entire matter like civilized
adults. And if she didn't give him the right answers, he'd strangle
her. He could always arrest himself afterward. But he only saw Lori sitting at the
keyboard, frantically typing. "I'll have the damn changes by
six," she called out. Her brow was furrowed in concentration as
she glanced up. Her eyes frosted over. "What the hell do you want?" "I need to see Bess." "You're out of luck." Nobody
hurt her friend and got away with it. Nobody. "She's not here." "Where?" She offered an anatomically impossible
suggestion, offered it so coolly he nearly smiled. But it wasn't
enough. She leapt up and slammed the door shut. Locked it. "Sit
down, buster, I've got an earful for you." "Tell me where she is." "When hell freezes over. Do you
know what you did to her?" She took the flat of her hand to push
him back. "Why didn't you just cut her heart and slice it into
little pieces while you were at it?" "What I did?" He jammed his
hands into his pockets so he wouldn't shove her back. "I'm the
one who walked in and found her snuggled up to that pretty-faced
playwright." "You don't know what you found." "Then why don't you tell me?" She'd die first. "You don't know
her at all, do you? You didn't have a clue how lucky you were. She's
the most loving, most generous, most unselfish person I've ever
known, She'd have crawled through broken glass for you." Afraid
she'd do something violent if she didn't move, Lori began to pace. "I
was so happy when she told me about you. I could see how much in love
she was. Really in love. She wasn't just taking you under her wing
until she could find someone for you." "Find someone for me?" "What do you think she did with
all those other men who were dazzled by her?" Lori tossed back.
"Oh, she'd try to talk herself into being in love, and thinking
they loved her, back, and the whole time she'd listen to their
problems like some den mother. Then she'd steer them in the direction
of some woman she'd decided was perfect for them. She was usually
right." "She was going to marry—" "She was never going to marry
anyone. Whenever she said yes, it was because she couldn't bear to
hurt anyone's feelings. And, okay, because she always wanted to have
someone she could count on. But however loyal, however sensitive, she
is to other people's feelings, she's not stupid. She'd tell herself
she was going to get married, then she'd go into overdrive finding
the guy a substitute." "Substitute? Why—?" But
Lori wasn't ready to let him get a word in. "Not that she ever calculated it
that way. But after you watched it happen a couple of times, you saw
the pattern. But you…" She whirled back to him. "You
broke the pat tern. She needed you. You made her cry." Angry
tears glazed Lori's own eyes. "Not once did I ever see her cry
over any man. She'd just slip seamlessly into the my-pal-Bess
category, and everyone was happy. But she's cried buckets over you." He felt sick, and small, and he was
beginning to understand a great deal about groveling. "Tell me
where she is. Please." "Why the hell should I?" "I love her." She wanted to snarl at him for daring
to say so, but she recognized the same misery in his eyes she'd seen
in her friend's. "Charlie was—" "No." He shook his head
quickly. "It doesn't matter." What did matter was trust,
and it was time he gave it. "I don't need to know. I just need
her." With a sigh, Lori fingered the
square-cut diamond on her left hand. Bess had pushed her into taking
the right step with Steven. She could only hope she was doing the
same in return. "If you hurt her again, Alex—" "I won't." Then he sighed. "I
don't want to hurt her again, but I probably will." She weakened, because it was exactly
the thing a man in love would say. "I sent her home. She wasn't
in any shape to work." "Dyakuyu." "What?" "Thanks." She hated feeling this way. The only
way Bess could get from one day to the next was by telling herself it
would get better. It had to get better. But she didn't believe it. She hadn't had the heart to throw out
the lilacs. She'd tried to. She'd even stood holding them over the
trash can, weeping like a fool. But the thought of parting with them
had been too much. Now she tormented herself with the fragile scent
whenever she came downstairs. She thought about taking a
trip—anywhere. She certainly had the vacation time coming, but
it didn't seem fair to leave Lori in the lurch, especially since Lori
had added wedding plans to her work load. A lot of good she was doing Lori, or
the show, this way, she thought. But the problem of the people in
Millbrook seemed terribly petty when compared to hers. Too bad she
couldn't write herself out of this one, she thought, as she stood in
the kitchen, trying to talk herself into fixing something to eat. Well, she'd certainly made the grade,
Bess told herself, and pressed her fingers against her swollen eyes.
She'd fallen in love and had her heart broken. Great research for the
next troubled relationship she invented for the television audience. The hell with food. She was going to go
up to bed and will herself to sleep. Tomorrow she would find some way
to put her life back together. When she stepped out of the kitchen,
what was left of her life shattered at her feet. He was standing by the table, one hand
brushing over the lilacs. All he did was look at her, turn his head
and look, and she nearly crumpled to her knees. "What are you doing here?"
The pain made her voice razor-sharp. "I still have my key." He
lowered his hand slowly. Her eyes were still puffy from her last bout
of tears, and there were smudges of fatigue under them. Nothing that
had been said to him, nothing he'd said to himself, had lashed more
sharply. "You didn't have to bring it by."
If composure was all she had left, she would cling to it. "You
could have dropped it in the mail. But thanks." Her smile was so
cold it hurt her jaw. "If that's all, I'm in a hurry. I was just
on my way up to change before I go out." "You can't look at me when you
lie." He said it half to himself, remembering how her eyes had
drifted away from his face when she said she didn't love him. She forced her gaze back to his, held
it steady. "What do you want, Alexi?" "A great many things. Maybe too
many things. But first, for you to forgive me." Her face crumpled at that. She put a
hand up to cover it, knowing it was too late. "Leave me alone." "Milaya, let me—" "Don't." She cringed away,
crossing her arms over herself in self-defense, and his hands stopped
an inch away. There was an odd catch in his breath as he drew them
back and let them fall to his sides. "I won't touch you." His
voice was quiet and strained. "Please, let me say what I've come
to say." "What else could there be?"
She turned away. "I know what you think of me. You made that
clear." "What I did was hurt you and make
a fool of myself." "Oh, yes, you hurt me." She
was still trembling from it. "But not just that last time. You
hurt me every time you pulled back when I needed to tell you how much
I loved you. I thought, I won't let it matter, because he'll have to
see it. God, he'll have to see it, because it's right there every
time I look at him. Every time I think about him. And he loves me. He
wants me. In my whole life, no one wanted me. Not really." "Bess." She jerked away from his hands. "My
parents," she began, turning back. "How many times I heard
them say to each other, 'Where did she come from?' As if I was some
stray pet that had wandered in by mistake." When she began to roam the room, her
shoulders still hunched protectively, he said nothing. How could he
tell her he was sorry he'd opened up old wounds, and sorry, as well,
that it had taken that to have her reveal those smothered feelings to
him? "I handled it." Those stiff
shoulders jerked as she tried to shrug it off. "What else could
I do? It wasn't their fault, really. They've always been so perfect,
in their way, and I could never be. Not for them. Not even for you." "Do you think that's what I want?" She glanced back then. The tears had
dried up. There was no point in them. "I don't know what you
want, Alexi. I only know it keeps circling around. I went from my
parents into school. Those awful teenage years, when all the girls
were so bright and pretty, and falling in and out of love. No one
wanted me. Oh, I had friends. Somewhere along the line I'd learned
that if you didn't try so hard, if you just relaxed and acted
naturally, that there were a lot of people who'd like you for what
you were. But there was never anyone to love. There has never been
anybody to love until you." "There's never going to be anyone
else." He waited until she turned back. "I love you, Bess.
Please, give me another chance." "It won't work." She rubbed
at her drying tears with the heel of her hand. "I thought it
would, I wanted it to. I was so sure love would be enough. But it's
not. Not without hope. Certainly not without faith." The calm way she said it had panic
streaking through him. "Do you want me to crawl?" He
ignored her defensive retreat and gripped her arms. "Then I
will. You're not going to push me out of your life because I was
stupid, because I was afraid. I won't let you." Was this how a man crawled? she
wondered. With his eyes flashing fire and his voice booming? "And
the next time you see me kissing an old friend?" "I won't care." With a sound
of disgust, he released her to stalk the room. "I will care.
I'll kill the next one who touches you." "Then New York would be littered
with bodies." It should be funny, she thought. Why wasn't it
funny? "I can't change what I am for you, Alexi. I wouldn't ask
you to change for me." "No, you wouldn't." He
scrubbed his hands over his face and struggled to find some balance.
"I know a kiss between friends is harmless, Bess. I'm not quite
that big a fool. But the other night, when I walked in—" "You assumed I was betraying you." "I don't know what I assumed."
It was as honest as he could get. "When I saw you, I felt…
It was all feeling," he said carefully. "So I didn't think.
In my heart, in my head, I know better than to assume anything. One
of my own rules that I broke. There were reasons." Calmer now,
he walked back and took her hands. "We'd just finished the bust,
and I was wired from it. I knew I'd tell you about it, all about it.
I'd gone beyond trying to separate that part of my life—any
part of it—from you. It was going to upset you to think about
it, because of Rosalie. I knew that, too. Damn it, I knew you'd gone
to that funeral alone, and I felt like the lowest kind of creep for
letting you." He was prying her heart open again,
inch by inch. "I didn't think you knew." "I knew." His voice was flat.
All he could think was how desperately he wanted to hold her. "You
leave notes everywhere. All these pieces of paper scattered around,
with scribbling on them about dry-cleaning and dialogue and
appointments. I saw the one about the flowers you'd ordered for her,
and the directions to the cemetery." He looked down at their
hands. "If things hadn't been moving so fast in the
investigation, I would have taken the time. I would have tried to." That she didn't doubt. "It was
more important to me that you catch the man who killed her than that
you go stand over her grave." "I wasn't with you," he said,
more slowly. "And I wanted to be. And when I got here, I wanted
to…" This was hardly the time to bring up the ring in his
pocket. "I was churned up about a lot of things, Bess. My
response was way out of line, and I'll apologize for it as often as
you like. But I'd like you to hear me out." "It's all right." She gave
his hands a squeeze, hoping he'd release hers. He didn't. "Alexi,
Charlie was here because—" "I don't need to know." Now
he let her hands go to bring his own to her face. He wanted her to
see what was in his eyes. "You don't have to explain yourself to
me. You don't have to change yourself for me." She felt something move inside her
heart and was afraid to believe it was healing. "I'd rather
clear the air. I was too angry to do it before. He came by to tell me
that Gabrielle was expecting. He was like a little boy at Christmas,
and he wanted to share his good news with a friend. And to ask me if
I'd be godmother—even though it's seven and a half months down
the road." He lowered his brow to hers. "You
should have slugged me, McNee." When he moved his mouth toward
hers, he felt her retreat. Patiently he stroked his thumbs over her
temples. "Just once," he murmured and tasted her lips. He didn't mean to deepen the kiss,
didn't mean to crush her against him and hold her so tightly neither
of them could breathe. But he couldn't stop himself until he felt her
body shake with a fresh bout of tears. "Don't. Please don't." He
pressed his face into her hair and rocked her. "I'll break
apart." Turning her face into his shoulder, she
fought back the worst of the tears. "I didn't want you to come
back. I didn't want to feel this again." He deserved that, he thought as he
squeezed his eyes tight. "You were right to send me away. I want
a chance to prove to you that you're right to let me back in."
He brushed a hand through her hair. "You're so good at
listening, Bess. I have to ask you to listen to me now." "You don't need to apologize
again." She could do nothing but love him, she realized, and,
drawing back, she managed a smile. "And I can't let you back in,
because you were always here." Her words brought a pressure to his
chest. He pressed their joined hands against it to try to ease it
away. "Just that easy?" "It's not easy." She supposed
it would never be easy. "It's just the way it is." "Mikhail said I would grovel,"
he murmured. "Bess, you humble me." "Let's put it behind us." She
drew a deep breath, then kissed both his cheeks as a sign of peace.
"I'm good at fresh starts." "No." Taking her hand, he
pulled her to the couch. "I like our other start. We don't need
a new one, only to play this one out. Sit." He pulled her down
with him, keeping her hand close to his heart. "You explained,
now I will. I was afraid to believe in you. No woman has ever meant
what you mean, and I let myself imagine that you'd be with me
forever. Just as I let myself imagine that you'd turn away. And
because I was more afraid of the second, it seemed more real." "It's hard to be afraid." She
turned her cheek to her hand. "I know." "You don't know all." He
glanced away, toward the flowers subtly scenting the room. "You
kept the lilacs." "I tried not to." She smiled
again. "But they were so beautiful." "I brought you something besides
lilacs that day." He reached into his pocket and drew out the
box. Her hand went limp in his. He watched her lips tremble apart. "I
don't think it's ostentatious." When she only continued to
stare, he shifted. "That was a joke." "Okay." The two syllables
came out in a whisper. "Are you—are you going to let me
see it?" For an answer, he opened the box
himself. Inside was a gold band set with a rainbow of gems. He knew
what they were only because he'd asked the jeweler to identify each
of them. The amethyst, the peridot, the blue topaz, the citrine. "I know it's not traditional,"
he said when she remained silent. "But it reminded me of you,
and I wanted—hell, I wanted something no one else would have
thought to give you." "No one has," she managed,
barely breathing. "No one would." "If you don't like it, we can look
for something else." She was afraid she would cry again and
knew it would do neither of them any good. "It's lovely.
Beautiful." She managed to tear her gaze from it. "You
bought me this before? You had it with you the other night? You were
going to give it to me, then you walked in and saw me with Charlie."
Laughing, she lifted a hand to her cheek. "I'm surprised you
didn't gun us both down. I couldn't have written it better myself." "Then you forgive me?" She already had, but since he was
looking so nervous, she nodded. "Anyone with such good taste
deserves a second chance." "I bought this days ago, but it
took me a while to work up the nerve. Facing a junkie with an Uzi
seemed easier." But he was into it now, and he was going to
finish. "My idea was to pressure you to accept it, then push for
a quick wedding so you wouldn't change your mind. But that was
wrong." He closed the box, and was encouraged by Bess's quick
gasp of dismay. "It was stupid, and it showed a lack of faith in
both of us. I'm sorry." "I—You—" She let
out a frustrated breath. "I don't mind." "Of course you do," he said.
"It was calculating, even devious, when a proposal of marriage
should be romantic. So, when we're both ready, I'll ask you
properly." Her face fell. "When we're both
ready?" "I don't want to push you when you
might be feeling a little vulnerable. Especially since a long
engagement is out. So I'll give you time." "Time," she echoed, ready to
scream. "It's fair." He waited a
beat. "Okay, I'm ready." Before she could laugh, he was down on
one knee. "What are you doing?" "A proper proposal of marriage."
He nearly launched into his humble little speech. Instead, his eyes
darkened when she continued to laugh. "You don't want one." "Damn right I want one. But I want
you up here." She took his hand to tug him back to the couch so
that they were at eye level with each other. "I want you to look
me right in the eye." "Okay, then I get something I
want, too." "Name it." "I want to hear you say it."
He caught her hand, brought it to his cheek. "I want very much
to hear you say it. I need to hear the words from you." "I love you, Alexi." For the
first time, she said the words smiling, knowing they would be taken
as they were meant. "I'm going to love you forever." He turned his face so that his lips
pressed into her palm. Taking the ring out of the box, he slipped it
onto her finger. It shot out a rainbow of color. As he linked his
fingers with hers, he lifted his head. "Be my family." He
shook his head before she could speak and felt himself stumble. "I
meant to be romantic. Let me—" "No." Overwhelmed, she laid a
hand over his lips. "That was perfect. Don't change it. Don't
change anything." "Then say yes." "Yes." She threw her arms
around him and laughed. "Oh, yes…" If you enjoyed reading about the
Stanislaski brothers, look for THE STANISLASKI SISTERS: NATASHA AND
RACHEL complete novels available in one
fabulous volume, from Silhouette Books and CONSIDERING KATE, a brand-new book in the Stanislaski
saga, available from Special Edition. Only from #1 New York Times bestselling
author NORA ROBERTS Both books on sale in February 2001, at
your favorite retail outlets. Here's a sneak preview of TAMING NATASHA, the first story in The
Stanislaski Sisters: Natasha and Rachel. It was only dinner, Natasha told
herself as she walked to the door. And he was only a man, she added,
pulling the door open. An outrageously attractive man. He looked wonderful, was all she could
think, with his hair swept back from his face, and that half smile in
his eyes. "Hi." He held out another red
rose. Natasha nearly sighed. Giving in a
little, she tapped the blossom against her cheek. "It wasn't the
roses that changed my mind," she said. "About what?" "About having dinner with you." He smiled then, fully, and exasperated
her by looking charming and cocky all at the same time. "What
did?" "I'm hungry." She set her
short velvet jacket on the arm of the sofa. "I'll put this in
water…" The restaurant he'd chosen was only a
short drive away. Over her first glass of wine, she told herself to
relax and enjoy. Over dinner, she was careful to steer the
conversation toward subjects they had touched on in his class. But
Spence was equally determined to explore more personal areas. "Tell me about your family." Natasha slipped a hot, butter-drenched
morsel of lobster into her mouth. "I'm the oldest of four,"
she began, then became abruptly aware that his fingertips were
playing casually with hers on the tablecloth. She slid her hand out
of reach. Her maneuver had him lifting his glass
to hide a smile. "Are you all spies?" A flicker of temper joined the lights
that the candle brought to her eyes. "Certainly not." "I wondered, since you seem so
reluctant to talk about them." His face sober, he leaned toward
her. "Say 'Get moose and squirrel.'" Her mouth quivered before she gave up
and laughed. "I have two brothers and a sister. My parents still
live in Brooklyn." "You said you were about five when
you came to the States. Do you remember much about your-life before
that?" "Of course." He ran a fingertip down her wrist and
surprised a shiver out of her. Before she moved her hand away, he
felt her pulse scramble. "What do you remember?" Because her reaction annoyed her, she
was determined to show him nothing. She only shrugged. "My
father bringing in wood for the fire, his hair and coat all covered
with snow. The baby crying—my youngest brother. The smell of
the bread my mother baked. Pretending to be asleep when I listened to
Papa talk to her about escape." "Were you afraid?" "Yes." Her eyes blurred with
the memory. She didn't often look back, didn't often need to. But
when she did, it came not with the watery look of dreams, but clear
as glass. "Oh, yes. Very afraid. More than I will ever be
again." "Will you tell me?" She started to pass it off, but the
memory remained too vivid. "We waited until spring and took only
what we could carry. We told no one, no one at all, and set off in
the wagon. Papa said we were going to visit my mother's sister who
lived in the west. But I think there were some who knew, who watched
us go with tired faces and big eyes. Papa had papers, badly forged,
but he had a map and hoped we would avoid border guards." "And you were only five?" "Nearly six by then."
Thinking, she ran a fingertip around and around the rim of her glass.
"Mikhail was between four and five, Alex just two. At night, if
we could risk a fire, we would sit around it and Papa would tell
stories. Those were the good nights. We would fall asleep listening
to his voice and smelling the smoke from the fire. We went over the
mountains and into Hungary. It took us ninety-three days." He couldn't imagine it, not even when
he could see it reflected so clearly in her eyes. Thinking of the
little girl, he took her hand and waited for her to go on. "My father planned for years.
Perhaps he had dreamed of it all his life. He had names, people who
would help defectors. There was war, the cold one, but I was too
young to understand. I understood the fear in my parents, in the
others who helped us. We were smuggled out of Hungary into Austria.
The church sponsored us, brought us to America. It was a long time
before I stopped waiting for the police to come and take my father
away." "That's a lot for a child to deal
with." "I also remember eating my first
hot dog." She smiled and picked up her wine. She never spoke of
that time, never. Not even with family. Now that she had, with him,
she felt a desperate heed to change the subject. "No childhood
is ever completely secure. But we grow up. I'm a businesswoman, and
you're a respected composer. Why don't you write?" She felt his
fingers tense on hers. "I'm sorry," she said quickly. "I
had no business asking that." "It's all right." His fingers
relaxed again. "I don't write because I can't." "I know your music. Something,
that intense doesn't fade." "It hasn't mattered a great deal
in the past couple of years. Just lately it's begun to matter again." "Don't be patient." When he smiled, she shook her head.
"No, I mean it. People always say when the time is right, when
the mood is right, when the place is right. Years are wasted that
way. If my father had waited until we were older, until the trip was
safer, we might still be in the Ukraine. There are some things that
should be grabbed with both hands and taken. Life can be very, very
short." He could feel the urgency in the way
her hands gripped his. And he could see the shadow of regret in her
eyes. The reason for both intrigued him as much as her words. "You may be right," he said
slowly, then brought the palm of her hand to his lips. "Waiting
isn't always the best answer." "It's getting late." Natasha
pulled her hand free, then balled it into a fist on her lap. But that
didn't stop the heat from spearing her arm… |
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