can be cut, painlessly.
It remains to be seen whether the "white room" cliche' will
fade from use now that most authors confront glowing screens
rather than blank white paper.
PART THREE: COMMON WORKSHOP STORY TYPES
The Jar of Tang. A story contrived so that the author can spring
a silly surprise about its setting, For instance, the story takes
place in a desert of coarse orange sand surrounded by an
impenetrable vitrine barrier; surprise! our heroes are microbes
in a jar of Tang powdered orange drink. (Attr. Stephen P. Brown)
When done with serious intent rather than as a passing
conceit, this type of story can be dignified by the term
"Concealed Environment." (Attr. Christopher Priest)
The "Poor Me" Story. Autobiographical piece in which the male
viewpoint character complains that he is ugly and can't get laid.
(Attr. Kate Wilhelm)
The Grubby Apartment Story. Similar to the "poor me" story, this
autobiographical effort features a miserably quasi-bohemian
writer, living in urban angst in a grubby apartment. The story
commonly stars the author's friends in thin disguises -- friends
who may also be the author's workshop companions, to their
considerable alarm.
The Shaggy God Story. A piece which mechanically adopts a
Biblical or other mythological tale and provides flat science-
fictional "explanations" for the theological events. (Attr.
Michael Moorcock)
Adam and Eve Story. Nauseatingly common subset of the Shaggy God
Story in which a terrible apocalypse, spaceship crash, etc.,
leaves two survivors, man and woman, who turn out to be Adam and
Eve, parents of the human race!!
Dennis Hopper Syndrome. A story based on some arcane bit of
science or folklore, which noodles around producing random
weirdness. Then a loony character-actor (usually best played by
Dennis Hopper) barges into the story and baldly tells the
protagonist what's going on by explaining the underlying mystery
in a long bug-eyed rant. (Attr. Howard Waldrop)
The Tabloid Weird. Story produced by a confusion of SF and
Fantasy tropes -- or rather, by a confusion of basic world-views.
Tabloid Weird is usually produced by the author's own inability to
distinguish between a rational, Newtonian-Einsteinian, cause-and-
