"atrocity archive excerpt" - читать интересную книгу автора (Stross Charles - Excerpt from The Atrocity Archive)
MarsDust - The Loudest Voice in Fandom
|
The Atrocity Archives
Excerpted from the novel by Charles Stross
|
![](atrocity%20archive%20excerpt_files/atrocity-large.jpg)
Cover illustration by Steve Montiglio
|
1
Active Service
Green sky at night; hacker's delight.
I'm
lurking in the shrubbery behind an industrial unit, armed with a
clipboard, a pager, and a pair of bulbous night-vision goggles that
drench the scenery in ghastly emerald tones. The bloody things make me
look like a train-spotter with a gas-mask fetish, and wearing them is
giving me a headache. It's humid and drizzling slightly, the kind of
penetrating dampness that cuts right through waterproofs and gloves.
I've been waiting out here in the bushes for three hours so far,
waiting for the last workaholic to turn the lights out and go home so
that I can climb in through a rear window. Why the hell did I ever say
"yes" to Andy? State-sanctioned burglary is a lot less romantic than it
sounds -- especially on standard time-and-a-half pay.
|
(You
bastard, Andy. "About that application for active service you filed
last year. As it happens, we've got a little job on tonight and we're
short-staffed; could you lend a hand?")
I stamp my feet
and blow on my hands. There's no sign of life in the squat
concrete-and-glass block in front of me. It's eleven at night and there
are still lights burning in the cubicle hive: Don't these people have a
bed to go home to? I push my goggles up and everything goes dark,
except the glow from those bloody windows, like fireflies nesting in
the empty eye sockets of a skull.
There's
a sudden sensation like a swarm of bees throbbing around my bladder. I
swear quietly and hike up my waterproof to get at the pager. It's not
backlit, so I have to risk a precious flash of torchlight to read it.
The text message says, MGR LVNG 5 MINS. I don't ask how they know that,
I'm just grateful that there's only five more minutes of standing here
among the waterlogged trees, trying not to stamp my feet too loudly,
wondering what I'm going to say if the local snouts come calling. Five
more minutes of hiding round the back of the QA department of Memetix
(UK) Ltd. -- subsidiary of a multinational based in Menlo Park,
California -- then I can do the job and go home. Five more minutes
spent hiding in the bushes down on an industrial estate where the white
heat of technology keeps the lights burning far into the night, in a
place where the nameless horrors don't suck your brains out and throw
you to the Human Resources department -- unless you show a deficit in
the third quarter, or forget to make blood sacrifice before the altar
of Total Quality Management.
Somewhere in
that building the last late-working executive is yawning and reaching
for the door remote of his BMW. The cleaners have all gone home; the
big servers hum blandly in their air-conditioned womb, nestled close to
the service core of the office block. All I have to do is avoid the
security guard and I'm home free.
A
distant motor coughs into life, revs, and pulls out of the landscaped
car park in a squeal of wet tires. As it fades into the night my pager
vibrates again: GO GO GO. I edge forward.
No
motion-triggered security lights flash on. There are no Rotweiller
attack dogs, no guards in coal-scuttle helmets: this ain't that kind of
movie, and I'm no Arnold Schwartzenegger. (Andy told me: "If anyone
challenges you, smile, stand up straight, and show them your warrant
card -- then phone me. I'll handle it. Getting the old man out of bed
to answer a clean-up call will earn you a black mark, but a black
mark's better than a cracked skull. Just try to remember that Croxley
Industrial Estate isn't Novaya Zemlya, and getting your head kicked in
isn't going to save the world from the forces of evil.")
I
squish through the damp grass and find the designated window. Like the
briefing said, it's shut but not locked. A good tug and the window
hinges out toward me. It's inconveniently high up, a good four feet
above the concrete gutter. I pull myself up and over the sill, sending
a tiny avalanche of disks scuttering across the floor. The room is
ghostly green except for the bright hot spots of powered-down monitors
and fans blowing air from hot CPU cases. I stumble forward over a desk
covered in piles of kipple, wondering how in hell the owner is going to
fail to notice my great muddy boot-print between the obviously
confidential documents scattered next to a keyboard and a stone-cold
coffee mug. Then I'm on the floor in the QA department, and the clock
is ticking.
The pager vibrates again.
SITREP. I pull my mobile out of my breast pocket and dial a three-digit
number, then put it back again. Just letting them know I've arrived and
everything's running smoothly. Typical Laundry job -- they'll actually
include the phone bill in the event log to prove I called in on
schedule before they file it somewhere secret. Gone are the days of the
impromptu black-bag job . . .
The offices
of Memetix (UK) Ltd. are a typical cubicle hell: anonymous beige fabric
partitions dividing up little slices of corporate life. The photocopier
hulks like an altar beneath a wall covered with devotional scriptures
-- the company's code of conduct, lists of compulsory employee
self-actualization training courses, that sort of thing. I glance
around, hunting cubicle D14. There's a mass of Dilbert cartoons pinned
to the side of his partition, spoor of a mildly rebellious mind-set;
doubtless middle managers prowl round the warren before any visit from
the upper echelons, tearing down such images that signal dissent. I
feel a minor shiver of sympathy coming on: Poor bastard, what must it
be like to be stuck here in the warren of cells at the heart of the new
industrial revolution, never knowing where the lightning's going to
strike next?
There's a desk with three
monitors on it: two large but otherwise ordinary ones, and a weird-ass
piece of machinery that looks at least a decade old, dredged out of the
depths of the computer revolution. It's probably an old Symbolics Lisp
machine or something. It tweaks my antique gland, but I don't have time
to rubberneck; the security guard's due to make another round in just
sixteen minutes. There are books leaning in crazy piles and drifts on
either side: Knuth, Dijkstra, Al-Hazred, other less familiar names. I
pull his chair back and sit down, wrinkling my nose. In one of the desk
drawers something's died and gone to meet its maker.
Keyboard:
check. Root account: I pull out the filched S/Key smartcard the Laundry
sourced from one of Memetix's suppliers and type the response code to
the system's challenge. (One time passwords are a bitch to crack; once
again, give thanks to the Laundry's little helpers.) Then I'm logged in
and trusted and it's time to figure out just what the hell I'm logged
in to.
Malcolm -- whose desk I sit at,
and whose keyboard I pollute -- is running an ant farm: there are dead
computers under the desk, scavenged for parts, and a dubious
Frankenstein server -- guts open to the elements -- humming like a
generator beside it. For a moment I hunt around in panic, searching for
silver pentacles and glowing runes under the desktop -- but it's clean.
Logged in, I find myself in a maze of twisty little automounted
filesystems, all of them alike. Fuck shit curse dammit, I recite under my breath; it was never like this in Cast a Deadly Spell. I pull out the phone and dial.
"Capital Laundry Services, how may we help you?"
"Give me a hostname and target directory, I'm in but I'm lost."
"One sec . . . try 'auto-share-fs-scooby-netapp-user-home-malcolm-R-catbert-world underscore domination-manifesto.' "
I
type so fast my fingers trip over each other. There's a faint clicking
as the server by the desk mounts scooby's gigantic drive array and
scratches its read/write heads, looking for what has got to be one of
the most stupidly named files anywhere on the company's intranet.
"Hold
on . . . yup, got it." I view the sucker and it's there in plaintext:
Some Notes Toward a Proof of Polynomial Completeness in Hamiltonian
Networks. I page through the text rapidly, just skimming; there's no
time to give it my full in-depth attention, but it looks genuine.
"Bingo." I can feel an unpleasant slimy layer of sweat in the small of
my back. "I've got it. Bye for now."
"Bye
yourself." I shut the phone and stare at the paper. Just for a moment,
I hesitate . . . What I'm here to do isn't fair, is it? The imp of
perversity takes over: I bang out a quick command, mailing the
incriminating file to a not-so-dead personal account. (Figure I'll read
it later.) Then it's time to nuke the server. I unmount the netapp
drive and set fire to it with a bitstorm of low-level reformatting. If
Malcolm wants his paper back he'll have to enlist GCHQ and a scanning
tunneling microscope to find it under all the 0xDEADBEEF spammed across
the hard disk platters.
My pager buzzes
again. SITREP. I hit three more digits on the phone. Then I edge out of
the cubicle and scramble back across the messy desk and out into the
cool spring night, where I peel off those damned latex gloves and
waggle my fingers at the moon.
I'm so
elated that I don't even remember the stack of disks I sent flying
until I'm getting off the night bus at home. And by then, the imp of
perversity is chuckling up his sleeve.
I'm fast asleep in bed when the cellphone rings.
It's
in my jacket pocket, where I left it last night, and I thrash around on
the floor for a bit while it chirps merrily. "Hello?"
"Bob?"
It's Andy. I try not to groan. "What time is it?"
"It's nine-thirty. Where are you?"
"In bed. What's -- "
"Thought you were going to be in at the debrief? When can you come in?"
"I'm not feeling too wonderful. Got home at about two-thirty. Let me think . . . eleven good enough?"
"It'll
have to be." He sounds burned. Well, Andy wasn't the one freezing his
butt off in the woods last night, was he? "See you there." The implicit
or else doesn't need enunciating. Her Majesty's Extra-Secret Service
has never really been clear on the concept of flexitime and sensible
working hours.
I shamble into the
bathroom and stare at the thin rind of black mold growing around the
window as I piss. I'm alone in the house; everyone else is either out
-- working -- or out -- gone for good. (That's out, as in working, for
Pinky and the Brain; out, as in fucked off, for Mhari.) I pick up my
senescent toothbrush and perform the usual morning ritual. At least the
heating's on. Downstairs in the kitchen I fill a percolator with
nuclear-caffeinated grounds and nudge it onto the gas ring. I figure I
can make it into the Laundry by eleven and still have time to wake up
first. I'll need to be alert for that meeting. Did last night go off
properly, or not? Now that I can't do anything about them I remember
the disks.
Nameless dread is all very
well when you're slumped in front of the TV watching a slasher movie,
but it plays havoc with your stomach when you drop half a pint of
incredibly strong black coffee on it in the space of fifteen minutes.
Brief nightmarish scenarios flit through my head, in order of severity:
written reprimands, unemployment, criminal prosecution for
participating in a black-bag job for which authorisation is
unaccountably retroactively withdrawn; worst of all, coming home to
find Mhari curled up on the living room sofa again. Scratch that latter
vision; the short-lived sadness gives way to a deeper sense of relief,
tempered by a little loneliness. The loneliness of the long-distance
spook? Damn, I need to get my head in order. I'm no James Bond, with a
sexy KGB minx trying to seduce me in every hotel room. That's about the
first thing they drum into you at Capital Laundry Services ("Washes
cleaner than clean!"): life is not a spy movie, work is not romantic,
and there's nothing particularly exciting about the job. Especially
when it involves freezing your balls off in a corporate shrubbery at
eleven o'clock on a rainy night.
Sometimes
I regret not having taken the opportunity to study accountancy. Life
could be so much more fun if I'd listened to the right recruiting spiel
at the university milk round . . . but I need the money, and maybe one
of these days they'll let me do something interesting. Meanwhile I'm
here in this job because all the alternatives are worse.
So I go to work.
|
Want to comment of this story? Come on over to the new DustClub!
Home | Cover Models | Tales | Art| Fashion | Music
Games | People| MarsMall | DustClub | Bad Attitude
"The Atrocity Archives" is © 2001 Charles Stross
All other content is © 2003 MYSTERIAN MEDIA LLC
Contact | Advertise | Info | Privacy Policy
|
|
|
MarsDust - The Loudest Voice in Fandom
|
The Atrocity Archives
Excerpted from the novel by Charles Stross
|
![](atrocity%20archive%20excerpt_files/atrocity-large.jpg)
Cover illustration by Steve Montiglio
|
1
Active Service
Green sky at night; hacker's delight.
I'm
lurking in the shrubbery behind an industrial unit, armed with a
clipboard, a pager, and a pair of bulbous night-vision goggles that
drench the scenery in ghastly emerald tones. The bloody things make me
look like a train-spotter with a gas-mask fetish, and wearing them is
giving me a headache. It's humid and drizzling slightly, the kind of
penetrating dampness that cuts right through waterproofs and gloves.
I've been waiting out here in the bushes for three hours so far,
waiting for the last workaholic to turn the lights out and go home so
that I can climb in through a rear window. Why the hell did I ever say
"yes" to Andy? State-sanctioned burglary is a lot less romantic than it
sounds -- especially on standard time-and-a-half pay.
|
(You
bastard, Andy. "About that application for active service you filed
last year. As it happens, we've got a little job on tonight and we're
short-staffed; could you lend a hand?")
I stamp my feet
and blow on my hands. There's no sign of life in the squat
concrete-and-glass block in front of me. It's eleven at night and there
are still lights burning in the cubicle hive: Don't these people have a
bed to go home to? I push my goggles up and everything goes dark,
except the glow from those bloody windows, like fireflies nesting in
the empty eye sockets of a skull.
There's
a sudden sensation like a swarm of bees throbbing around my bladder. I
swear quietly and hike up my waterproof to get at the pager. It's not
backlit, so I have to risk a precious flash of torchlight to read it.
The text message says, MGR LVNG 5 MINS. I don't ask how they know that,
I'm just grateful that there's only five more minutes of standing here
among the waterlogged trees, trying not to stamp my feet too loudly,
wondering what I'm going to say if the local snouts come calling. Five
more minutes of hiding round the back of the QA department of Memetix
(UK) Ltd. -- subsidiary of a multinational based in Menlo Park,
California -- then I can do the job and go home. Five more minutes
spent hiding in the bushes down on an industrial estate where the white
heat of technology keeps the lights burning far into the night, in a
place where the nameless horrors don't suck your brains out and throw
you to the Human Resources department -- unless you show a deficit in
the third quarter, or forget to make blood sacrifice before the altar
of Total Quality Management.
Somewhere in
that building the last late-working executive is yawning and reaching
for the door remote of his BMW. The cleaners have all gone home; the
big servers hum blandly in their air-conditioned womb, nestled close to
the service core of the office block. All I have to do is avoid the
security guard and I'm home free.
A
distant motor coughs into life, revs, and pulls out of the landscaped
car park in a squeal of wet tires. As it fades into the night my pager
vibrates again: GO GO GO. I edge forward.
No
motion-triggered security lights flash on. There are no Rotweiller
attack dogs, no guards in coal-scuttle helmets: this ain't that kind of
movie, and I'm no Arnold Schwartzenegger. (Andy told me: "If anyone
challenges you, smile, stand up straight, and show them your warrant
card -- then phone me. I'll handle it. Getting the old man out of bed
to answer a clean-up call will earn you a black mark, but a black
mark's better than a cracked skull. Just try to remember that Croxley
Industrial Estate isn't Novaya Zemlya, and getting your head kicked in
isn't going to save the world from the forces of evil.")
I
squish through the damp grass and find the designated window. Like the
briefing said, it's shut but not locked. A good tug and the window
hinges out toward me. It's inconveniently high up, a good four feet
above the concrete gutter. I pull myself up and over the sill, sending
a tiny avalanche of disks scuttering across the floor. The room is
ghostly green except for the bright hot spots of powered-down monitors
and fans blowing air from hot CPU cases. I stumble forward over a desk
covered in piles of kipple, wondering how in hell the owner is going to
fail to notice my great muddy boot-print between the obviously
confidential documents scattered next to a keyboard and a stone-cold
coffee mug. Then I'm on the floor in the QA department, and the clock
is ticking.
The pager vibrates again.
SITREP. I pull my mobile out of my breast pocket and dial a three-digit
number, then put it back again. Just letting them know I've arrived and
everything's running smoothly. Typical Laundry job -- they'll actually
include the phone bill in the event log to prove I called in on
schedule before they file it somewhere secret. Gone are the days of the
impromptu black-bag job . . .
The offices
of Memetix (UK) Ltd. are a typical cubicle hell: anonymous beige fabric
partitions dividing up little slices of corporate life. The photocopier
hulks like an altar beneath a wall covered with devotional scriptures
-- the company's code of conduct, lists of compulsory employee
self-actualization training courses, that sort of thing. I glance
around, hunting cubicle D14. There's a mass of Dilbert cartoons pinned
to the side of his partition, spoor of a mildly rebellious mind-set;
doubtless middle managers prowl round the warren before any visit from
the upper echelons, tearing down such images that signal dissent. I
feel a minor shiver of sympathy coming on: Poor bastard, what must it
be like to be stuck here in the warren of cells at the heart of the new
industrial revolution, never knowing where the lightning's going to
strike next?
There's a desk with three
monitors on it: two large but otherwise ordinary ones, and a weird-ass
piece of machinery that looks at least a decade old, dredged out of the
depths of the computer revolution. It's probably an old Symbolics Lisp
machine or something. It tweaks my antique gland, but I don't have time
to rubberneck; the security guard's due to make another round in just
sixteen minutes. There are books leaning in crazy piles and drifts on
either side: Knuth, Dijkstra, Al-Hazred, other less familiar names. I
pull his chair back and sit down, wrinkling my nose. In one of the desk
drawers something's died and gone to meet its maker.
Keyboard:
check. Root account: I pull out the filched S/Key smartcard the Laundry
sourced from one of Memetix's suppliers and type the response code to
the system's challenge. (One time passwords are a bitch to crack; once
again, give thanks to the Laundry's little helpers.) Then I'm logged in
and trusted and it's time to figure out just what the hell I'm logged
in to.
Malcolm -- whose desk I sit at,
and whose keyboard I pollute -- is running an ant farm: there are dead
computers under the desk, scavenged for parts, and a dubious
Frankenstein server -- guts open to the elements -- humming like a
generator beside it. For a moment I hunt around in panic, searching for
silver pentacles and glowing runes under the desktop -- but it's clean.
Logged in, I find myself in a maze of twisty little automounted
filesystems, all of them alike. Fuck shit curse dammit, I recite under my breath; it was never like this in Cast a Deadly Spell. I pull out the phone and dial.
"Capital Laundry Services, how may we help you?"
"Give me a hostname and target directory, I'm in but I'm lost."
"One sec . . . try 'auto-share-fs-scooby-netapp-user-home-malcolm-R-catbert-world underscore domination-manifesto.' "
I
type so fast my fingers trip over each other. There's a faint clicking
as the server by the desk mounts scooby's gigantic drive array and
scratches its read/write heads, looking for what has got to be one of
the most stupidly named files anywhere on the company's intranet.
"Hold
on . . . yup, got it." I view the sucker and it's there in plaintext:
Some Notes Toward a Proof of Polynomial Completeness in Hamiltonian
Networks. I page through the text rapidly, just skimming; there's no
time to give it my full in-depth attention, but it looks genuine.
"Bingo." I can feel an unpleasant slimy layer of sweat in the small of
my back. "I've got it. Bye for now."
"Bye
yourself." I shut the phone and stare at the paper. Just for a moment,
I hesitate . . . What I'm here to do isn't fair, is it? The imp of
perversity takes over: I bang out a quick command, mailing the
incriminating file to a not-so-dead personal account. (Figure I'll read
it later.) Then it's time to nuke the server. I unmount the netapp
drive and set fire to it with a bitstorm of low-level reformatting. If
Malcolm wants his paper back he'll have to enlist GCHQ and a scanning
tunneling microscope to find it under all the 0xDEADBEEF spammed across
the hard disk platters.
My pager buzzes
again. SITREP. I hit three more digits on the phone. Then I edge out of
the cubicle and scramble back across the messy desk and out into the
cool spring night, where I peel off those damned latex gloves and
waggle my fingers at the moon.
I'm so
elated that I don't even remember the stack of disks I sent flying
until I'm getting off the night bus at home. And by then, the imp of
perversity is chuckling up his sleeve.
I'm fast asleep in bed when the cellphone rings.
It's
in my jacket pocket, where I left it last night, and I thrash around on
the floor for a bit while it chirps merrily. "Hello?"
"Bob?"
It's Andy. I try not to groan. "What time is it?"
"It's nine-thirty. Where are you?"
"In bed. What's -- "
"Thought you were going to be in at the debrief? When can you come in?"
"I'm not feeling too wonderful. Got home at about two-thirty. Let me think . . . eleven good enough?"
"It'll
have to be." He sounds burned. Well, Andy wasn't the one freezing his
butt off in the woods last night, was he? "See you there." The implicit
or else doesn't need enunciating. Her Majesty's Extra-Secret Service
has never really been clear on the concept of flexitime and sensible
working hours.
I shamble into the
bathroom and stare at the thin rind of black mold growing around the
window as I piss. I'm alone in the house; everyone else is either out
-- working -- or out -- gone for good. (That's out, as in working, for
Pinky and the Brain; out, as in fucked off, for Mhari.) I pick up my
senescent toothbrush and perform the usual morning ritual. At least the
heating's on. Downstairs in the kitchen I fill a percolator with
nuclear-caffeinated grounds and nudge it onto the gas ring. I figure I
can make it into the Laundry by eleven and still have time to wake up
first. I'll need to be alert for that meeting. Did last night go off
properly, or not? Now that I can't do anything about them I remember
the disks.
Nameless dread is all very
well when you're slumped in front of the TV watching a slasher movie,
but it plays havoc with your stomach when you drop half a pint of
incredibly strong black coffee on it in the space of fifteen minutes.
Brief nightmarish scenarios flit through my head, in order of severity:
written reprimands, unemployment, criminal prosecution for
participating in a black-bag job for which authorisation is
unaccountably retroactively withdrawn; worst of all, coming home to
find Mhari curled up on the living room sofa again. Scratch that latter
vision; the short-lived sadness gives way to a deeper sense of relief,
tempered by a little loneliness. The loneliness of the long-distance
spook? Damn, I need to get my head in order. I'm no James Bond, with a
sexy KGB minx trying to seduce me in every hotel room. That's about the
first thing they drum into you at Capital Laundry Services ("Washes
cleaner than clean!"): life is not a spy movie, work is not romantic,
and there's nothing particularly exciting about the job. Especially
when it involves freezing your balls off in a corporate shrubbery at
eleven o'clock on a rainy night.
Sometimes
I regret not having taken the opportunity to study accountancy. Life
could be so much more fun if I'd listened to the right recruiting spiel
at the university milk round . . . but I need the money, and maybe one
of these days they'll let me do something interesting. Meanwhile I'm
here in this job because all the alternatives are worse.
So I go to work.
|
Want to comment of this story? Come on over to the new DustClub!
Home | Cover Models | Tales | Art| Fashion | Music
Games | People| MarsMall | DustClub | Bad Attitude
"The Atrocity Archives" is © 2001 Charles Stross
All other content is © 2003 MYSTERIAN MEDIA LLC
Contact | Advertise | Info | Privacy Policy
|
|
|
|