"Sheri S. Tepper - The Fresco" - читать интересную книгу автора (Tepper Sherri)

her. She never got close! Oh, he had good points. He was always good to his mother. He wouldn't work to
help her out with money, but he was always ready to help her out with advice or carrying stuff or taking
her somewhere. He never once laid a hand on the children. If he was sober, he was delightful with them:
he'd tell the tall stories about places he'd been, things he'd done. He'd take them to the zoo or the
playground or the movies. Of course, if he was drunk, he could tongue-lash them raw, so she kept them
out of his way when he was that way. But even sober, he never talked with her, and she tried to figure out
why that was, what she could do differently. She bought books and tried everything they suggested. After
that one try at counseling at the county mental health clinic, there didn't seem to be any point in trying
again.
Even with his drinking cronies, he didn't talk much, and what little she overheard going on among
them was totally predictable. Same stories. Same angers. Same jokes directed at the same targets: women,
fags, foreigners, any racial or religious group except their own. Not that they were religious, but they had
a common acceptance of what they'd honor and what they wouldn't. They wouldn't spit on a cross or the
flag or a Bible, but they'd kick a small dog or hit a sassy woman without blinking.
At seventeen, she'd taken him at his own estimation, at his own word. He was an artist. He would
have great career. Besides he had brooding good looks, simmering glances, a line of compliments, used
often enough with enough other women to sound sincere, though she didn't know that then. Benita had
had no defenses, and she'd very quickly become pregnant with Carlos and defiantly happy about it. Papa
said she would be married before the baby was born, or else. He and Mami had a furious argument about
it, one of the few Benita could remember. Mami said no, let the baby come, they'd take care of it in the
family, Bert wouldn't be a good husband. Papa said no, Benita had to learn that actions have
consequences, good husband or not, she would not have a bastard.
Surprisingly enough Bert wanted to marry her, and she thought marrying him was all she wanted. He
even had a place for them to live, with his widowed mother. In fact, as it turned out, Mrs. Shipton had
suggested to Bert that he get married so she'd have some company and help in the house, which was
something else Benita didn't know at the time. Benita's giddy delirium carried her through Carlos's birth
and Angelica's birth two years later, and partway through the year after that, by which time she had begun
to perceive, though still dimly, just what it was she had done.
"You must go to work, Benita.тАЭ Mami had said it calmly, as she said most things. "This is the fourth
time you have come to me to borrow money for groceries.тАЭ
"Mother Shipton . . . she's been paying for groceries, Mami, but her social security only goes so far . .
.тАЭ
"If you have no money to feed your children, you must work. You have no choice.тАЭ
"Mami, Bert's looking for work . . .тАЭ
"He quit his last job, Benita.тАЭ
"He said they fired him for no reason . . .тАЭ
"He quit, Benita. The people gave him that job as a favor to your father, so he asked them why Bert
left. He left because they expected him to work, actually do things. Bert prefers not to work. If he will not
work, you must.тАЭ
"But, the babies, and Mother Shipton . . .тАЭ
"I will care for the babies daytimes. Soon they can go to nursery school, and you must also pay for
that. Bert's mother is Bert's concern, and her own. She is not an invalid, Bennie.тАЭ
"I'm not qualified for anything . . .тАЭ
"You are a woman. Hombres son duro, pero mujeres son durable. I have found you a job.тАЭ
After that, Benita had been so busy she had never had time to think, except about one thing.
"The mistake you made must stop with you," said Mami. "Your children must go to school! To
college.тАЭ
That was the start of the secret bank account. That was the start of Mami's little lectures to Carlos and
Angelica. By the time Angelica was five, she was saying, "When I go to college, Mama.тАЭ
Bert had a different idea. He played with Angelica and called her his cutie-pie, but since the time