"James Tiptree Jr. - Love is the Plan the Plan is Death" - читать интересную книгу автора (Tiptree James Jr)

I leap for the ground, I rush diving into a crevice, I wiggle and burrow under
the fearful bellowing and clanging that rains on me from above. Into the rocks
I go with the hunting claws of Mother crashing behind me.

Oh my redling, my little tenderling! Never have you known such a night. Those
dreadful hours hiding from the monster that had been my loving Mother!

I saw her once more, yes. When dawn came I clambered up a ledge and peered
through the mist. It was warm then, the mists were warm. I knew what Mothers
looked like; we had glimpses of huge horned dark shapes before our own Mother
hooted us under her. Oh yes, and then would come Mother's earthshaking
challenge and the strange Mother's answering roar, and we'd cling tight,
feeling her surge of killfury, buffeted, deafened, battered while our Mother
charged and struck. And once while our Mother fed I peeped out and saw a
strange baby squealing in the remnants on the ground below.

But now it was my own dear Mother I saw lurching away through the mists, that
great rusty-grey hulk so horned and bossed that only her hunting-eyes showed
above her armor, swivelling mindlessly, questing for anything that moved. She
crashed her way across the mountains and as she went she thrummed a new harsh
song. Cold! Cold! Ice and Lone. Ice! And cold! And end. I never saw her again.

When the sun rose I saw that the gold fur was peeling from my shiny black. All
by itself my hunting-limb flashed out and knocked a hopper right into my jaws.

You see, my berry, how much larger and stronger I was than you when Mother
sent us away? That also is the Plan. For you were not yet born! I had to live
on while the warm turned to cold and while the winter passed to warm again
before you would be waiting. I had to grow and learn. To learn, my Lilliloo!
That is'
important. Only we black ones have a time to learn -the Old One said it.

Such small learnings at first! To drink the fiat water-stuff without choking,
to catch the shiny flying things that bite and to watch the storm-clouds and
the moving of the sun. And the nights, and the soft things that moved on the
trees. And the bushes that kept shrinking, shrinking-only it was me,
Moggadeet, growing larger! Oh yes! And the day when I could knock down a
fatclimber from its vine!

But all these learnings were easy-the Plan in my body guided me. It guides me
now, Lililoo, even now it would give me peace and joy if I yielded to it. But
I will not! I will remember to the end, I will speak to the end!

I will speak the big learnings. How I saw-though I was so busy catching and
eating more, more, always more-I saw all things were changing, changing.
Changers! The bushes changed their buds to berries, the fatclimbers changed
their colors, even the sun changed, and the hills. And I saw all things were
together with others of their kind but only me, Moggadeet. I was alone. Oh, so
alone!