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The World Before
THE WORLD BEFORE
KAREN TRAVISS
For the Brigade of
Gurkhas
Contents
Prologue
"What am I, then?" asked Sergeant
Bennett.Aras walked ahead…
ONE
Ade Bennett clung to his schedule
twenty-five light-years…
TWO
Lindsay Neville just stood back. She
should have intervened, but…
THREE
Mar'an'cas was a striking landmark but it
seemed the…
FOUR
"You haven't lost your touch for stirring
up shit," said…
FIVE
A halo of shimmering hot air formed around
the Eqbas…
SIX
Shan let out a long rattling breath that
trailed off…
SEVEN
Eddie sprinted along the terraces. His
lungs were screaming for…
EIGHT
She could see lights. She could see red
and green…
NINE
"That," said Rayat, "is exquisite."
Lindsay saw the wall of…
TEN
Esganikan's ship had become a city in its
own right. …
ELEVEN
Shan began slipping the 9mm pistol in the
back of…
TWELVE
Someone hit her. She couldn't tell who it
was but…
THIRTEEN
"Holy shit," said Eddie. He inhaled a
chunk of… dehydrated
FOURTEEN
Shan walked along the shoreline of
Ouzhari, suitless and bewildered.…
FIFTEEN
"He should have known," said Shan.
Esganikan walked with her,…
SIXTEEN
The vessel that had separated itself to
visit Bezer'ej appeared…
SEVENTEEN
The scent of jask hit Nevyan before she
entered the…
EIGHTEEN
Ade crouched down to look Serrimissani in
her hostile black…
NINETEEN
It was cold and the bezeri who nestled in
the…
TWENTY
Nevyan knew now that her gut feel, as Shan
called…
TWENTY ONE
"He'll be okay, kid," said Shan. Giyadas
had a…
TWENTY TWO
Rayat made Lindsay a hot mug of broth. She
considered…
TWENTY THREE
The snow was knee-deep. Wess'har didn't
like the cold… but
TWENTY FOUR
The atmosphere over lunch was tense. Shan
had always… been
TWENTY FIVE
"Oh," said Shan. "Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh." Two
macaws fluttered among the vines,…
TWENTY SIX
Shapakti wasn't happy about the change of
plans, and it…
TWENTY SEVEN
Lindsay Neville watched Aras walk down the
path between… the
TWENTY EIGHT
Ade watched the skyline for the approach
of a small…
Ouzhari, once known as
Christopher Island,
on Bezer'ej: 2376 in the calendar of the gethes.
"What am I, then?" asked Sergeant Bennett.
Aras walked ahead of the human, picking a path between
the decaying bodies on the shoreline. A conversation among the dead
felt unseemly, but Aras knew that Ade Bennett had seen many
battlefields and had learned to handle the horror. He wasn't
irreverent. He was simply trying to cope.
"If you're asking if your appearance will change as
mine has, I can't answer that."
"Am I still human?"
Aras turned and looked hard into the soldier's eyes for
a sign of greedy excitement. There was nothing, not even fear, although
that would have been reasonable. Ade--he insisted Aras use his
nickname--was what Shan Frankland had called "a good bloke," a solid
professional soldier known as a Royal Marine. There was no monarchy any
more, and he was twenty-five light-years from his own seas, but humans
clung to those ancient identities. They even gave their warships names.
Judging by his unwavering gaze, Ade was still waiting
for a fuller answer. Aras understood the mix of dread and desperate
curiosity all too well.
"Mostly human," said Aras. "But a little isenj, a
little bezeri, a little wess'har. A little of whatever host that c'naatat
passed through."
"And what will kill me, exactly?"
"For all practical purposes, almost nothing. How your c'naatat
achieves that and adapts you will
depend on what you experience and what it takes a fancy to. You may
simply find the changes…a little disconcerting."
Ade nodded as if he understood, and wandered away to
check something at the waterline. The sand had once been white. Now it
was blackened and vitrified in places by the blast of cobalt-salted
nuclear devices.
And every few meters there were more decaying bodies of
bezeri beached by the tide.
Without their bioluminescence, the corpses of the
bezeri were a colorless translucent gel. There were four or five in a
cluster at Aras's feet. It was hard to count because the mantles were
decomposing and the outlines merging, but it looked to Aras like a
family group--two five-meter males with their great tentacles coiled
back, a female distinguishable by her narrower shape, and a smaller,
possibly juvenile male.
"Whoa, over here," called Ade. He slung his rifle
across his shoulder and crouched down. Aras went to see what he had
found.
There was a faint flicker of green light in a small
shape on the waterline. It was another juvenile. And it was still alive.
Ade bent closer. "Is there anything we can do?"
Aras took out the signaling lamp that he had always
used to communicate with the bezeri in their language of colored lights.
"No," he said.
There was nothing much they could say, either. Sorry:
sorry I failed to protect you. Sorry I didn't
wipe out all the carrion eaters, all the gethes, when I first
had the chance.
He said what little he could and the lamp translated.
I'm sorry. I let you down.
The response was a small flicker of that same green
light, incoherent, barely enough to raise a faint breath of sound from
the lamp. It was just a cry. It was fading.
Aras squatted close to the dying juvenile and comforted
it as best he could in words of light.
I'm here, little one.
Ade's brow furrowed briefly. The creature's tentacles
looked as if they were already rotting. "Have you got Eddie's camera?"
"You can't make education or entertainment out of this."
"People back home need to know what we've done." Ade
held out his hand for the small device that the journalist Eddie
Michallat had given them. "I think this says it all."
He aimed the camera, still looking detached but
emitting a scent of agitation that Aras could detect even through the
powerful ammonia stench of rotting flesh around them.
Aras remembered a human scientist called Surendra
Parekh who he had executed for killing a bezeri infant, and wished
again that he had executed all the gethes
when he had the chance.
Except Shan Frankland.
The juvenile bezeri flickered again, this time an
unusually deep blue.
Can you see me? asked
Aras. Did any of you escape?
There was no response. Ade glanced at him and they
waited long minutes, but the bioluminescence had gone forever.
Ade stood up and panned the camera across the beach,
capturing more devastation. There were no lights in the water any more.
"So this is collateral damage," he said.
Aras checked himself again, examining his skin for
signs of lesions. He was unmarked. Apart from his all-consuming grief
and anger, he was fine. C'naatat could
handle gamma radiation. But the microscopic symbiont had existed in the
soil of Ouzhari, and it couldn't have withstood the temperatures of a
nuclear blast.
It was no threat to anyone here.
There was no need for the gethes to
destroy it.
There were two things Aras knew c'naatat
couldn't do. It couldn't save its host from fragmentation; that was the
way all the wess'har troops infected with c'naatat
had eventually ended their lives.
And it couldn't save a host exposed to the vacuum of
space.
Aras looked up at a hazy sky where Wess'ej appeared as
a crescent moon. She was out there somewhere, Shan Frankland, not
wholly human, and so determined to stop humankind taking her c'naatat
that she chose death instead. Ade
wouldn't discuss it any longer. But Aras knew that spacing yourself was
a terrible way to die.
"How long?"
Ade looked away from the camera. "What?"
"How long does it take a human to die in vacuum?"
"Stop it, Aras."
"How long?"
Ade paused. "About twelve seconds. At most."
Aras thought about it, counting. He closed his eyes.
Ade had witnessed it and he hadn't. Ade had--
"No, I can't stop seeing it," said Ade. His voice was
suddenly hoarse. "And I know bloody well that you blame me for it, so
let's just agree that I'm the bastard who let her die."
Aras stifled urges to punish Ade. He also pitied him.
His scent said brother: he had Shan's
genes now, just as Aras did. He couldn't--wouldn't--harm
him.
He would save his balancing vengeance for Commander
Lindsay Neville, who had detonated the bombs here even if she hadn't
known the full consequences of her actions. And he would spare some for
her accomplice, Mohan Rayat. Rayat was a spook,
as Ade called it. Neville was a fool. And Ade was a victim of
circumstances they had created.
"I suggest we get decontaminated and return to
Wess'ej," said Aras. "Eddie will be impatient for his pictures."
Aras was mired in his own bereavement as he walked
among the bodies. For all the foreign genes his c'naatat
had acquired over the years, he was still wess'har, but the human
components within him were screaming me, me, me.
In that brief moment, he would have sacrificed all Bezer'ej and even
Wess'ej itself to bring Shan back.
She was his isan. He could
hardly function without her.
But he would have to learn.
The Federal
European Union greatly regrets the loss of life on Bezer'ej and the
deaths of Superintendent Frankland and her ussissi aide. We condemn the
actions of Commander Neville. Let me restate our position: we did not
and would not sanction first-use of nuclear devices. As we have no
effective military structure left on Umeh, there is no direct
disciplinary action we can take against Commander Neville or the troops
under her command; but they are now dismissed the service, and in the
absence of FEU enforcement, they fall properly within the scope of your
own judicial system as the protectors of the bezeri. Our representative
Dr. Mohan Rayat will offer every cooperation.
BIRSEN ERTEGUN,
Foreign Minister, Federal European Union,
in a statement to the matriarchs of F'nar
F'nar, on Wess'ej, August
2376
Ade Bennett clung to his schedule
twenty-five light-years from home in an alien city that was coated
entirely in pearl.
He ran ten kilometers every morning at dawn and there
was no reason to stop doing it just because the sun was now a different
star and he was a prisoner of war. He pounded along the terraces of
F'nar and down its stepped slopes.
Wherever the sun warmed smooth stone, the tem
flies would congregate and deposit a thin
layer of nacre. The iridescence was insect shit: Shan had found that
funny, Aras said. She liked irony.
And she's dead. And it's all
your fucking fault. You let her die.
Ade wanted to erase the final picture of her standing
in the airlock, seconds from death. But it was the last scrap of her
that he could still grasp, the memory of a woman he had never expected
to love and to whom he had left everything unsaid. Something in him
wouldn't let it go. He had decided to confront it instead.
The native wess'har paused to stare at him as he made
his way down the terraces. Some acknowledged him with stiff nods of
their sea horse heads. He was a POW in a city where he was regarded as
a hero, but every day he was here served only to remind him that he was
alive and Shan wasn't, and that he'd failed the basic heroic
qualification of saving what you loved.
Sweat prickled its way down his back. He made his way
through the alleys that honeycombed the lowest level of the city at the
bottom of the encircling caldera. Beyond the city lay the irregular
mosaic of fields and allotments that blended into the natural
landscape, and beyond them were the plains that were arid in summer and
covered with quick-growing vegetation in the brief, wet winter. F'nar
had been built where it would have least impact rather than the most
convenient location. Wess'har didn't seem to have the same priorities
as humans.
Ade's route took him south of the caldera and up the
rock face of a volcanic plateau that looked down onto the fields and
the city itself. He liked climbing: it was one of the basic mountain
warfare skills he had learned as a Royal Marine, and he could lose
himself in absolute concentration. Free-soloing--climbing without a
partner or equipment--was what he did best. That was just as well.
There
was no other way to climb on Wess'ej.
The rock face was smooth enough in places to attract
the attention of tem flies and it was
embossed with the pearly shit they'd laid down in the summer. If he
half-closed his eyes, the reflected glare made it look like a
snow-streaked peak back on Earth. He felt above his head with his right
hand for a secure hold and locked his fingers into a horizontal crevice.
For a few moments he hung with his full weight on one
hand, face against the cool gold rock, looking up at another hold
thirty centimeters beyond his normal reach.
Combat boots were lousy for climbing. He jammed a
toecap into a pocket of rock and transferred his weight, lunging
upwards to grab hold of the outcrop above him. He knew every hold on
the ascent now. He could climb it blindfolded.
What he really needed now was a good, solid hex to jam
into the fissure above him to take a rope. He wondered if the wess'har
might be able to make him some kit for the harder climbs. But for now
he was reliant on his free-climbing skills alone, and he reached for
another hold. The crevice accepted his fingers. It felt secure.
And the moment he hung all his weight on that hand, he
knew that it wasn't.
The rock came away from the face and suddenly there was
no sense of pressure under his fingertips at all.
He flailed, grabbing instinctively. He felt his right
humerus snap as his arm clipped an overhang and he landed flat on his
back with an involuntary shout as the air was slammed out of his lungs.
He couldn't breathe. His head was filled with a single high note like a
tuning fork's. For a second he wondered if it was his own scream of
pain, but then he realized the noise was somehow inside his head,
probably triggered by a shattered spine.
He'd been told that happened. It was funny how you
could think rational things when you were dying.
Shit, shit, shit--
It occurred to him that he deserved to die anyway. Shan
was dead, so if he died too, then at least he'd never have to wake up
to that realization again. The pain filled his mouth. He had no idea
how long he lay there paralyzed and wondering when the sky would go
dark.
You can't die. Aras said so.
But he was dying, he was sure of it: and now he wanted it over with.
Instead of being filled with creeping cold, he felt he
was burning. Then the searing pain ebbed and he found himself
breathing, first reflex, shallow gasps while he tested his ribs, and
then deep breaths.
Eventually he eased himself up on his left arm. His
right arm was throbbing, but he could move it. It took him a few more
minutes to recover enough to stand up and understand what had happened
to him.
So this was c'naatat at
work. A fall that would have killed or crippled him was now a temporary
but painful--and terrifying--inconvenience. It didn't take a genius to
work out how valuable c'naatat was or how
open it would be to abuse. It was just a shock to experience it so
spectacularly.
"Shit," he said. "You couldn't give me a way out, could
you?" But that wasn't fair. Aras needed him now. Somehow, they had to
get each other through the bleak days ahead that were all Ade's fault.
There might even come a time when he could go for hours without
thinking of Shan and what he had done, but that wasn't now.
He stood staring at the backs of his hands for a few
minutes to see if anything else was changing, and when he was satisfied
that nothing was happening he looked up at the rock face to work out a
new route to ascend.
At the top he stood and scanned the landscape. The
secluded cairn he had built looked out over an idyllic vista; without a
grave--without even a body--he desperately needed a place where he
could
commemorate Shan. He needed somewhere to apologize and grieve. Maybe
he'd bring Aras up here one day, but not yet. Now was too soon. And he
preferred to cry on his own.
It wasn't as if they'd even had a relationship.
If Shan ever belonged to anyone she had belonged to
Aras. But she was the Boss, even if she was a police officer and so not
part of his chain of command, and for Ade she always would be. He ought
to have called her the Guv'nor as coppers
did. But she had never seemed to mind.
He knelt down and added a few pearl-coated stones to
the mound.
"There you go, Boss." The word hurt. He took his medals
out of his pocket and folded the brightly colored ribbons around them
before easing them into a gap between the chunks of rock and the fine
pearl pebbles. "All tidy. Sleep tight."
He paused for a few moments, entirely incapable of
prayer because he had seen too many things that no reasonable god would
allow, and turned to start his descent. His palm itched and he glanced
down at it. Right to receive, left to pay away;
that was what his mum used to say. Beads of green liquid were welling
up from his skin and he wiped his hand on the leg of his battledress,
but the fluid emerged again like one of those miracles that was
supposed to happen to the statues of saints.
It was no miracle and he felt as far from sainthood as
any man ever had. It was the bioscreen being removed a cell at a time. C'naatat
was purging him of all his implants and
the organic battlefield computer grown into his palm. But it hadn't
touched his tattoos, and Ade thought they were the sort of thing c'naatat
would have wanted to tidy up. Aras had
warned him that the parasite wasn't predictable.
"Sergeant?"
He thought he was alone. He wasn't. "Oh, Christ," he
said. His heart pounded.
Nevyan Tan Mestin was standing right behind him and he
should have heard her approach. He was a commando, for Chrissakes; she
shouldn't have been able to ambush him. The wess'har matriarch cocked
her head and looked past him at the cairn with four-lobed pupils
dilating and contracting visibly in bright yellow eyes. Sea horses.
Eddie's description was unnervingly
accurate.
"Why do you not walk up the slope to this summit?" she
asked. Wess'har voices were weird, tone and overtone like a chorus,
each word made of two simultaneous components. Will
I sound like that one day? "You choose a hard route."
"I like climbing, ma'am. I need to keep active."
"What are the stones for?"
"To remember. It's a memorial."
"To Shan Chail?"
"Yes." Wess'har didn't even bury their dead, let alone
erect monuments. They left them for the scavengers. "It helps."
"But you won't forget her."
"No, never. But I come here to think about her."
"And the pieces of metal?"
"They're--they're my medals." Ade was too embarrassed to
explain what medals were and how he had won his. "It's an old human
habit. We leave valuable things for the dead."
He'd said it aloud now, the word dead.
It had its own finality. He felt he'd betrayed Shan by letting it slip
out. Nevyan stood looking down at the cairn, thin multijointed fingers
meshed in front of her like an ornate basket, and her iridescent white
matriarch's robe was as bright as the shit-covered pebbles.
"I miss her too," she said at last. "May I come here to
think of her?"
No, thought Bennett. This is private. This is for me.
This is just for me to
get my head round this, if I ever can. It's for me and the Boss and
nobody else, maybe not even Aras.
"Of course you can, ma'am," he said, fighting
reluctance, and felt robbed.
But Nevyan had been Shan's friend, and this was her
planet and her city.
"We will recover her body, I promise you, and you shall
have your grave." She gestured towards F'nar. "Now walk with me. Let us
discuss what will happen to your comrades."
Ade obeyed, which was not unreasonable given that
Nevyan was now the leader of F'nar and he was technically her prisoner.
But it reminded him how easily he followed orders and how he had done
what Commander Neville had ordered. He had said yes,
ma'am when she asked him to land nuclear weapons on Bezer'ej and
he'd said yes, ma'am when she asked him to
capture Shan Frankland.
He should have said sod off,
ma'am. Maybe both Shan and the poor bloody bezeri would all be
alive now if he had. He had no idea how he was going to live with
himself in the very long future ahead of him or what it would take to
atone. He walked beside Nevyan, but whatever she was saying to him he
couldn't hear it. He could only see Shan through the shuttle hatch,
choosing a cold hard death rather than surrender c'naatat
to anyone. The image intruded more frequently every day.
If it mattered that much to the Boss to safeguard the
damn thing, then it would matter to him.
"You know that we don't take prisoners," said Nevyan. "What am I to
do with your comrades?"
Yes, he knew that. Wess'har killed, period. They were
strict vegans and respected all life, but once you were at war with
them it was to the death. "You mean Izzy and Chaz? The two marines
still with the colonists?"
"I mean all of them."
"The other three are still on Umeh."
"We shall be asking the isenj to return them, along
with Commander Neville and Dr. Rayat."
Ade managed to keep up with her stride. "Sorry?"
"Your government has abandoned you."
"I didn't think they'd be sending a limo to pick us up."
"I mean that they have dismissed you and turned you
over to us."
Ade wondered for a moment if Nevyan had misunderstood,
but her English was fluent to the point of being peppered with slang
that he recognized--painfully--as Shan's. "Ma'am, what exactly did they
say?"
She cocked her head, not slowing. "Dismissed
the service."
The fragile world that Ade had begun to think of
rebuilding had collapsed before him again. His gut churned. He knew
they'd face an enquiry but he hadn't expected to be kicked out and
dumped in the enemy camp. The FEU didn't know why he surrendered or
that he was far safer among wess'har than his own kind; as far as they
were concerned, they were shitting on him from a great height. Lindsay
Neville had asked for it, but not the detachment.
You're the bloody sergeant. You
should have stood up to her.
He could hear his own heartbeat pounding in his ears.
Nevyan stopped and stared at him, head tilted, pupils opening and
closing. Aras said wess'har could actually smell what state of mind you
were in by the scents you gave off. She looked like she could smell him
clearly enough.
"Sergeant--"
"I'm not a sergeant any more, am I?"
It hurt. Ade had been in the Corps since he was
sixteen. It was his refuge. It had given him self-respect and the
nearest thing he had to a family, and now it had been torn away from
him by some file-shuffler in Brussels who'd never been closer to war
than his news screen. He wondered what the hell he still had left,
stranded 150 trillion miles from Earth and never, ever going home again.
Sod it. He was whatever
the Corps had made him. He'd bloody well find something.
He peeled the sergeant's stripes off the sleeves of his
pullover. He'd leave them at the cairn tomorrow.
"It's Ade, ma'am," he said. "Just Ade."
Nevyan slowed her pace and they walked an unmarked path
that took them south of F'nar and led into the city like a processional
route into an arena. From most positions you couldn't even see F'nar
until you were right on top of it, and now Ade was looking straight
into its heart. The caldera was almost a complete ring, with homes and
terraces cut into the rock. With the icing of pearl laid by the tem
flies, it looked like a wedding cake turned
inside out.
He found himself thinking that it would be a good
location to defend but a hard one to escape.
"I won't harm your comrades," said Nevyan. "If they
want refuge here, we will accept them. My argument is with Neville and
Rayat."
"That's very generous of you, ma'am. Don't you hold us
all responsible?"
"Did you or your detachment activate the bombs?"
"No, but--"
"Then the act itself was not your responsibility."
If Ade needed another reminder that wess'har didn't
think like humans, this was one. He struggled with the concept.
"That's… generous."
"I think your government are a bunch
of tossers, yes?"
It was just what Shan would have said. Delivered in
that voice-upon-voice, it sounded utterly surreal.
"Yes, ma'am," said Ade. "Tossers."
Jejeno, Umeh: August 2376
in the calendar of the humans.
The city of Jejeno was not a smoking ruin when Minister
Par Paral Ual's vehicle made its way through the packed streets between
his office and the human habitat.
Ual had expected it to be. He had expected war. But it
had not yet come.
Where Umeh Station stood, there was no pall of smoke or
dying fire. It was still there, its translucent faceted dome glittering
in the forest of tall buildings east of his office. The wess'har hadn't
aimed their missiles at it in retaliation for the humans' nuclear
attack on Bezer'ej. Perhaps the destruction of Actaeon,
the Earth ship, had satisfied their need for balance.
He doubted it. It wasn't like them at all.
Ralassi--his ussissi aide--sat beside him, silent behind
his breather mask.
"We shall end up like Mjat," said Ual's driver. He
showed no impatience as isenj pedestrians parted ahead of the ground
car, moving according to strict unspoken traffic rules in the densely
packed city. The whole planet of Umeh was crammed with cities, and all
cities were like Jejeno. "They wiped us out on Asht."
"Bezer'ej," said Ual. The wess'har had renamed it. This is not
your world,
and never will be. This is the world of the bezeri. "The
wess'har call it Bezer'ej, and the humans Cavanagh's Star
Two."
All isenj remembered the fate of Mjat, their colony on
Asht. Mjat was now a synonym for holocaust. The event was five hundred
years ago as humans calculated, and it was not the only massive loss of
life in the wars with the wess'har: but it had a special place in the
isenj consciousness because it had resulted in the death of millions,
mostly civilians.
And the Destroyer of Mjat still lived, centuries after
he should have been dead. The driver was fascinated.
"So he's real, then, sir? Not a myth?"
"He is." It seemed impossible. "And living on Wess'ej."
"The humans caused the death of his female. Do they
know what he did to Mjat?"
"Yes."
"And are they afraid?"
"I'm not sure if they have the sense to be. And I'm not
sure that I fully understand the wess'har logic of culpability." Ual
knew what the ussissi told him, and what his genetic memory recalled,
and what the archives recorded. But he had never met a wess'har. "And
that ignorance is something I must remedy very soon."
The ground car pulled up at one of the airlocked
entrances to Umeh Station. "You mind yourself, sir," said the driver.
Ralassi trotted out in front of Ual. "Humans are said to be aggressive
when crowded."
Inside the dome, Umeh Station was in chaos. Ual
wandered unacknowledged into the humans' fragile bubble of a settlement
and decided that they might benefit from a lesson in how to create
order among large numbers.
The dome was strewn with the detritus of a project
still under construction. Nearly three hundred humans were now crammed
into a space built for two hundred, the numbers swelled by evacuated
crew from the unlucky Actaeon.
Ual was looking for one of Actaeon's
company in particular. He found Commander Lindsay Neville in the site
office, arguing with a civilian over arrangements to feed the dome's
population. Humans, it seemed, would not wait patiently for meals like
isenj. Neither the commander nor the civilian looked like healthy and
well-rested specimens of their kind.
Ual clicked impatiently and waited. He didn't have two
highly visible eyes, and humans needed something called eye contact
to get attention. Ual supposed he
looked like any of the many isenj workers to them--multilimbed,
spiny-coated and anonymously alien. Ralassi slipped between the humans,
all teeth and anger, and interrupted.
"Minister Ual is visiting you in
person," he snapped. "You will do him the courtesy of postponing
your argument."
Both humans fell silent. So this was the one that Eddie
called Lin.
"I note you did not go down with your ship, Commander
Neville," said Ual.
The civilian male picked up a paper from the desk and
walked out. Lindsay, standing stiffly as if used to deferring to
superiors, was wearing something they called a uniform.
Ual thought it odd that humans fought so much among themselves that
they needed markings to divide allies from enemies. Similarity should
have united them.
"Actaeon wasn't my ship,
sir," she said, seeming to miss the point. "We don't appear to have an
ITX comms link to Earth any longer. I really need to talk to Fleet.
Might you be able to help with that?"
The entangled photon link was the technology that held
the humans in the alliance: it was isenj technology, not theirs, and it
was not shared, merely lent. "These are nervous times, Commander," said
Ual. "I thought it might be safer for everyone if we restricted
communications between this base and your government. It is not secure,
as you call it, and I fear the wess'har
could overhear something that might provoke them further."
Neither of them had said the obvious. You
attacked a wess'har protectorate. Ual wanted
to see how she would broach the topic. She didn't know it yet, but her
masters had abandoned her and her soldiers to the mercy of Wess'ej;
he'd seen the Federal European Union's message, and it was time to tell
her.
"I didn't know the devices were salted with cobalt,"
she said. "I was duped. I truly regret that."
"A fine distinction that I fear will carry little
weight with the wess'har. Have you heard of Mjat, Commander?"
"Your colony on Bezer'ej. Well, your former colony."
"It was erased. Completely, and without trace. And that
was for accidentally polluting the bezeri's marine environment.
Wess'har are not a forgiving people, and Aras Sar Iussan is even less
forgiving than most."
"Okay, and I helped his precious Shan space herself. I
get the picture."
Ual doubted it. He doubted that Lindsay understood at
all: she would not have risked violating Bezer'ej if she had. It seemed
an appropriate time to break bad news.
"Your foreign minister sent a message condemning your
actions and used an interesting phrase--you and your troops are dismissed
the service." Ual searched for his
most colloquial English. "She has washed her hands of you and told the
wess'har that they may deal with you within their law."
Lindsay said nothing but she was blinking rapidly,
something Eddie Michallat did when an interview became strained.
"That's just great. Great."
Ual wasn't sure if she was upset or angry. "It's not fair on the
marines, though. They weren't party to this. The bastard you want is
Mohan Rayat."
"Ah, they did mention him. Apparently he is now the
FEU's chosen representative here."
Lindsay's mouth opened slightly as if she was gulping
in air. "He's their spook. An intelligence agent. A spy. You know what
that is?"
"I do now," said Ual.
He had never had to deal with spies before. Neither
wess'har nor ussissi had any concept of deliberate state secrecy; it
was alien to isenj as well. But they were now all learning fast. It
troubled Ual to discover just how much of the human brain was devoted
to deception. He wondered if his own mind would be altered by trying to
think as they did, and was grateful that he had already fathered
offspring and so would not pass on those memories to corrupt them.
"The wess'har will ask us to hand you over."
"And if you don't?"
"I have my own people's welfare to consider."
"I'll answer for my own actions," she said. "But only
if Rayat answers for his."
"I know you didn't act alone, but you're in no position
to make bargains."
"And I'm not carrying the can for this on my own.
What's happened to the rest of my marine detachment? Three are still
prisoners. I'd like them released."
"This isn't the time to make such a request of the
wess'har."
Lindsay Neville adjusted the gold braid tabs on the
shoulders of her uniform shirt. Then she unfastened them and slid them
off.
"Seeing as they've bypassed the court martial, I'll
dispense with these, then." She seemed more resigned than afraid of the
prospect of wess'har retribution. Perhaps she knew that they killed
fast and clean. "But if you can arrange a direct conversation between
me and FEU Command, I would consider that a great personal favor. If I
go, I won't go quietly."
Lindsay Neville walked out into the melee of soft,
larva-smooth humans. Ual didn't like hosting this unstable nest of
aliens in his city but he had to concentrate on the more immediate
threats. Of those, he was not sure which was the greater: the political
clamoring of his colleagues of the Northern Assembly, who wanted
answers on the human question, or the wrath of the wess'har.
"Ralassi, ask your comrades what they know," he said.
Ussissi were conduits of information. They worked for everyone and
served no one; they crewed both wess'har and isenj ships but they did
as they pleased and cherished their neutrality. "I need facts. Humans
aren't very good at supplying those."
Ralassi disappeared into the crowds outside the site
office, weaving between humans and isenj workers. Some ussissi had
returned after evacuating when retribution seemed imminent. They would
know what the wess'har intended. This was not what the humans called spying,
because the wess'har would neither
conceal their intentions nor broadcast them. They simply
acted--arrogant, aloof, alien--without notice or consultation.
Ual wandered around the dome, noting that there were
vines creeping across the supports that held the roof panels and a
fountain was playing in the central plaza. The base held the promise of
being pleasant accommodation when it was finished, with a cool, moist
atmosphere. He savored the rare treat of walking unrecognized as a
minister of state, eavesdropping on conversations among creatures that
had no idea he could understand them.
Perhaps that was what being a spook
was like. It seemed amusing.
He heard words like stranded
and never going home and we're not getting out of this.
He heard a few
words he didn't understand: fucked, sitting
ducks, shanghaied. They were the sort of words that Eddie
Michallat would have explained to him. He wondered if he might tempt
Eddie back to Umeh.
And still the humans ignored him. He was just another
alien to them, no longer a miracle of creation but an invisible part of
the backdrop to their own self-preoccupation. You
remind us of spiders. Eddie had always been brutally frank. Ual
found that if he made quick darting movements like the terrestrial
creature he could get humans to flinch instinctively and look at him.
That was amusing too.
It was a brief respite. The days and months ahead would
be anything but amusing.
Back in his vehicle, he waited for Ralassi. Ussissi
were another species the humans classified by similarity to creatures
from their own world: meerkats. Eddie said
it was their sharp faces and small teeth and the way they all sat up at
once when something grabbed their attention. So Ralassi was a meerkat,
and he was a spider,
and that was how humans coped with those who were different, by
classifying them as lower species.
Ralassi scrambled back into the ground car, his beaded
belts rattling. "I hear interesting reports," he said. "The wess'har
have sought help from the World Before, from Eqbas Vorhi. They're
coming to their aid--a most extraordinary thing."
Eqbas Vorhi. He had heard
the name, or an ancestor had. They changed worlds. "Should we fear
their intervention?" Ual asked.
"Oh yes," said Ralassi. "They are more numerous than
the wess'har of Wess'ej and have greater military resources. And they
are far less restrained. Wess'ej and Umeh may have shied away from
fighting on each other's homeworlds, but the Eqbas have a different
history."
"So it's true, then. They shape worlds to their wishes."
"Indeed. We know them. We
evolved with them."
The original wess'har homeworld--the ussissi's home
planet, too--had never intruded in isenj life. The wess'har in the Nir
system--what the humans called Cavanagh's Star, totally ignoring true
names again--had arrived thousands of years ago. They had cut off
contact with the rest of their people even though Eqbas was only five
light-years away by human reference, and that was all he knew.
If the wess'har here could keep isenj from Bezer'ej and
effectively confine them to Umeh and Tasir Var, what might the Eqbas
do? Ual and his fellow ministers thought an alliance with the humans
might change the balance of power.
Now they had certainly changed the future for the
isenj, but not in the way he had hoped.
"If the wess'har killed millions of my people when the
bezeri had asked for their aid, what will the Eqbas do now that the
humans have wiped them out?" Ual said, but it was a rhetorical
question. He could work out the sequence unaided.
Ralassi was right: Wess'ej had never threatened Umeh,
and Umeh had never attempted to attack Wess'ej. But Umeh had never been
host to an enemy base before, a complication that the whole city feared.
"We're on our own," said Ual. "The humans are
twenty-five years away. They have limited technology and our only
allies are the Federal European Union. The rest of their planet doesn't
care or actively opposes them. There will be no cavalry
coming to our aid."
"Cavalry?" Ralassi consulted his belt full of recording
devices. Interpreters liked new words. "What does that mean?"
Ual thought of database images of humans forcing other
creatures to carry them into battle, creatures dying from wounds and
starvation and exhaustion. "Something else the wess'har would not like
about humans."
Ual considered his options on the way back to his
office and said nothing more to Ralassi. The vehicle slowed and then
stopped. Crowds pressed on its sides as they tried to ease past it.
"What's the delay?"
Delay was relative in Jejeno. The driver listened
carefully to his comms link. "There is a disturbance ahead."
Ual and Ralassi squeezed out of the ground car and were
nearly crushed by the mass of isenj. Shrill panic had gripped them, and
panic was something to dread in a crowded city because it meant crush
injuries and death. Ual heard the word ship
repeated over and over.
An attack.
But there had been no alarm. There was no warning
system for invasion, but there was certainly one for civil emergencies
like street crushes. The fear that Umeh's immunity from attack had
evaporated had swept the city, and Ual expected to hear that alarm.
The crowd was now so tightly packed that all movement
had stopped. He could hear screams of pain. People were dying in the
melee. He shouldn't have stepped out of the car. Ralassi grabbed one of
his arms and tried to push him back inside to relative safety.
"Ship!" someone shouted.
Ual looked up and there was a vessel dropping through
the cloud, unfamiliar in shape, smooth and narrow.
The driver leaned out of the cab section, comlink
clutched to his chest, and tugged on Ual's arm. "They say it's just
ussissi. It's only the old human shuttle they salvaged. There's no
danger."
But it was too late for many to be comforted by that.
The fear of wess'har retaliation was so great that even an obsolete
transport vessel like this could send them into a terrified and deadly
scramble for safety.
"Inside, Minister," Ralassi insisted. "Let this pass."
Ual squeezed back into the car and settled on the broad
flat seat with relief. He was now pinned down in a street, unable to
drive or even walk away. It didn't bode well for the future. If the
wess'har ever attacked, the results would be catastrophic without their
needing to fire a single weapon. Cities were vulnerable by their very
nature. A planet that was simply one vast city was a disaster preparing
to unfold.
"Connect me to my communications," he said. "I might as
well use this time productively."
Ual had avoided conversations with the FEU foreign
minister for several days, although she had transmitted a number of
formal messages of apology and reconciliation. Now he knew what the
wess'har had in mind, he could have more than a token diplomatic
exchange. And he would insist on speaking to her without filtering or
interference from what Eddie called spin doctors.
Then he would call Eddie.
He had plans to speak to everyone. No, not
everyone. Dare I speak
to the matriarchs of F'nar?
"How do I contact the wess'har leaders?" he asked.
Ralassi's little teeth were just visible, and his eyes
narrowed into slits. It was a sign of disapproval. "The Assembly has
not authorized direct contact."
Perhaps it was a rash move. Ual had no idea what he
might say by way of conversation anyway: all conversations had been in
the form of warning statements and counter-warnings since the last
ancient war. "You're correct."
The crush outside showed no sign of abating. The car
shook a little, buffeted by a wave of movement that had started further
away. Ual pondered. He was the foreign minister: it was his job to make
decisions about the handling of relations with aliens, a previously
insignificant post. Now he was the center of political activity and he
wasn't sure if he could handle it with the confidence of the senior
cabinet, the ministers who managed interstate relations on Umeh itself.
Ual looked on his previous backwater status with sudden
nostalgia. Then the car lurched. "We'll soon have you back now, sir,"
said the driver. "The city safety patrol has opened a passage. You sort
those humans out, sir. They're nothing but trouble."
Ual pulled the covers down on the car's windows,
suddenly overwhelmed. The sight of pressed bodies outside was like a
prophecy.
When he reached his office the cool pale aquamarine
stone seemed less like welcome relief from the street crowds and more
like frightening isolation. His assistant, Mas Lij, indicated the
communications screen.
"There is another message for you from the FEU," said
Lij. "Birsen Ertegun is anxious to talk to you."
Ual settled on the slab of smooth-polished black
basalt--a costly extravagance--and rested his legs. The message was two
hours old and showed the human minister Ertegun--he noted her new
status--in a carefully managed pose, hands folded on her desk. Despite
that, she showed the signs of human agitation that the ussissi had
noted among those in Umeh Station--rapid blinking and licking of their
wet fleshy mouths. Ual couldn't blame her. He shared her fear.
The FEU foreign minister began by repeating her apology
and the message that she had broadcast for the benefit of the wess'har.
She asked if Ual thought they should evacuate all humans on Umeh, and
reminded him that the ship Thetis was less
than a year into its return journey to Earth and could be turned back.
Ual had started to learn the intricacies of the human
mind. He considered the offer.
"We should retrieve our people," said Ralassi. He meant
ussissi, Ual knew, but he chose to interpret our
in the widest sense. "We have nothing to gain from this mission."
"Should I tell them about Eqbas Vorhi, do you think?"
"They might as well know the seriousness of their
situation."
The isenj party and their ussissi interpreters were
still on board Thetis even though the
humans had already withdrawn their own people from the ship. The
invitation to visit Earth seemed fraught with danger now, and not only
for humans. For the past year the humans' news had been full of
objections to inviting aliens to Earth,
although they seemed to have no problem with inviting themselves to the
planets of others.
"Turning back Thetis will
solve the FEU's political problems with the rest of Earth's
governments," Ralassi offered.
"And effectively end the alliance with us, too."
Ual could ship the humans back. Umeh wouldn't be a
potential target any more. But it would take more than one Earth year
for Thetis to loop back, and Ual had no
idea if Umeh had that much time left to appease the wess'har. They acted.
They tended not to think.
Ual continued to listen to Ertegun's message.
He wondered if the minister realized that he already
knew the scientist Mohan Rayat was, as Lindsay Neville put it, a spook.
Ual considered replying to say as much,
but he had learned a lot from Eddie Michallat about harnessing the ebb
and flow of information. He began composing his reply carefully and
searched for the correct phrase to indicate that Dr. Rayat might care
to present himself to the wess'har authorities too.
This was the Game. He would play it.
The crisis may be
twenty-five light-years away but that makes it no less urgent. We
cannot tolerate a situation where the FEU, and the FEU alone, has
contact with these alien governments. The FEU has no mandate to plunge
the world into a state of war with nations we have never met. We now
have diplomacy by newscast, and that is intolerable. We insist that use
of the ITX link be made freely available to this chamber immediately or
sanctions must follow.
JIM MATSOUKIS,
senior Pacific Rim States delegate
to the United Nations
Umeh Station, Jejeno,
northern hemisphere of Umeh, August 2376.
Lindsay Neville just stood back. She
should have intervened, but she was no longer Mart Barencoin's
commanding officer. She wasn't anyone's commanding officer any more.
The marine was still limping a little from the gunshot
wound to his leg but his aggression was obviously fit and well. He
blocked Mohan Rayat's progress across the plaza of the crowded biodome.
It was hard not to attract a crowd in this place.
"So you're the boss fella now, are you?" Barencoin was
tall, solid and intimidating. However thoroughly he shaved, he always
looked as if he'd spent the last forty-eight hours lying in a
shell-scrape on observation. "Well, seeing as I'm now way outside the
Forces Discipline Act, here's a token of my appreciation as a civilian."
He punched Rayat hard in the face. His fist made a wet crack
when it landed and Rayat went down with an
unh.
There was an aaah
of surprise from the remnants of Actaeon's
company and the civilian contractors. Marine Jon Becken grabbed
Barencoin's arm and pulled him away.
A couple of onlookers broke into spontaneous applause.
Barencoin shook off Becken's grip and turned to a
couple of Regulating Branch ratings, Actaeon's
internal police. He massaged his hand. "Okay, I'm done. You can stick
me on a charge now."
"Never saw a thing," said the shorter of the two men. "It's a
bugger, this bad eyesight."
"Mart, for Chrissakes." Becken had a white-knuckled
grip on his arm. "Leave it, will you?"
Lindsay wandered over and stood with her arms folded
while Rayat got to his feet, a fat trickle of blood issuing from one
nostril. He wiped it on his sleeve as if he was used to dusting himself
down after a fight.
"I hope that's proved cathartic," he said, staring at
Barencoin. Maybe he was considering revisiting the argument later.
"Would you like me to spell that for you?"
"Patronizing twat." But Becken held on to Barencoin's
arm.
They had an audience, and that was no bad thing.
Lindsay wasn't taking the flak alone. She made a mock introductory
gesture in Rayat's direction. "Okay, in case any of you didn't see the
news, this is the man who decided to use the Beano bombs. He's an
intelligence officer. Spy, spook, respected member of the intelligence
community--take your pick. Have I missed anything out?"
She had been immersed in the confidential world of
need-to-know and secure information from the day she had taken her
officer's commission as a student. She could hardly believe she had
publicly denounced someone as a spy. For all that Rayat had done, the
act still felt wildly dangerous. But she was damned if he was going to
run this place. She wanted him frozen out.
"Yeah. Why use any bombs at all?" The question came
from a civilian engineer in an orange coverall. The woman didn't look
pleased. "What did you target?"
Lindsay gathered her thoughts. Shan was dead. Ouzhari
was scoured clean. Aras was beyond anyone's reach and nobody knew about
Ade Bennett. She decided it was time for the truth.
"A biohazard. A biohazard some of your companies would
have killed to get hold of."
"That's smart," said Rayat. He was standing quite
still, looking wary of tipping them into a mob with the wrong move. But
he still didn't look as scared as she felt. In fact, he didn't look
scared at all. "Any other classified information you want to divulge?"
"It's that immortality thing, isn't it?" said a
construction driver.
"Yes," said Lindsay. "And I'll leave you to work out
just how responsibly we'd make use of that back home."
The ussissi interpreters who worked for the isenj were
standing in a pack by the plaza's central fountain. If the dome had
been completed and the number of people housed in it had been halved,
it would have been a pleasant deployment. But it wasn't. People were
angry and crowded and scared. And the ussissi gave every sign of being
equally angry animals who might turn on humans at any time.
Only the isenj--patient, unfathomable, quill-covered
bulks on spider legs--seemed to be going about their business on site.
Lindsay imagined that any species forced to live at such close quarters
as the overcrowded isenj had developed a high level of tolerance to
adversity. They watched--or Lindsay assumed they watched, as they had
no
discernible eyes--while the humans wrangled.
"Who's got primacy here, the military or the sponsors?"
"Why have they cut our comms?"
"We're going to be stuck here for twenty-five years
whatever happens."
Rad Jaros, the engineer who had taken on the task of
managing the logistics of the emergency, scrambled onto the flatbed of
a transport and got instant silence when he stood up. That was
something Shan could do, too, but Lindsay knew she never could.
"That guy there's right," said Jaros, pointing into the
crowd. "If we're lucky, we're stuck here for the next quarter century.
If we're not, the wess'har will fry us, and there's sod all anyone can
do about that because there's nowhere to run and nobody's coming to
rescue us. So we make the best of it and get this place running
properly. We had a schedule before all this happened and now we just
have to adjust the numbers. Okay?"
"Who do you want running this place?" asked Lindsay.
"Not you or that spy, that's for sure," said a voice
from the crowd. "And who's going to enforce the bugger's authority
anyway? Our companies paid for most of this project. So we'll bloody
well run this ourselves."
Rayat had never struck Lindsay as a fool. He was on his
own out here: whatever government muscle he might have called upon back
on Earth was now a lifetime away. He didn't even have a hand-weapon. He
faced the thickening crowd.
"I think it's important that we maintain some sense of
order here," he said carefully. His hands were relaxed, palms down,
making placatory gestures of the kind that you learned would defuse
trouble. "If you would rather have a civilian administration, then I'm
happy to explain that to the Foreign Office when we make contact with
them."
"Who's the ranking naval officer here?" Lindsay asked.
There was silence while everyone in a uniform--ratings
and junior officers--looked around them. The reality of the loss of
life
in Actaeon was sobering. A stocky freckled
woman with a lieutenant's double gold stripe on both shoulder boards
raised her hand.
"Cargill, ma'am."
"Well, Cargill, you're admiral of the fleet out here,"
said Lindsay. "Make the most of it."
Lindsay found it harder to think more than a day ahead
now. She withdrew to a quiet corner behind one of the water purifiers
and sat down with her back against the gently vibrating pump housing.
Through the transparent panels of the dome she could see the dense,
intricate mass that was the city of Jejeno, separated from this little
fragment of Earth by a moat of service roads. It was the only scrap of
open space in the city.
What now?
When she had arrived on Bezer'ej nearly two years ago,
she had focused on completing the mission and going home to a
promotion. When she learned she was pregnant in an alien world, she
aimed to cope with that, and no more. When David died just a few weeks
old, she existed to exact revenge on Shan Frankland for not using c'naatat
to save him. And then she had seen the
reason why Shan could never save David, and she had taken on the task
of ensuring c'naatat never fell into the
hands of either government or commerce.
It was all about having a goal. But now she had no goal
at all.
She shut her eyes and tried to visualize herself the
following day, functioning normally and looking ahead. But she couldn't
see herself beyond the moment. Perhaps basic survival would occupy her.
She braced her elbows on her knees and thought about David, buried in
alien soil with a glass headstone to mark his small grave, then let her
head sink into her hands.
"Welcome to the world of the leper," said Mohan Rayat,
and sat down beside her. "You learn to cope with ingratitude in this
job."
"Sod off," she said.
"Eddie," trilled Giyadas, gravely serious.
"They're coming. What will they be like?"
The wess'har child walked briskly alongside him, a
little seahorse princess just a meter tall but who could already break
his arm if she wanted. Eddie Michallat was relieved that she liked him.
Wess'har females were formidable, and they started young.
"I've got no idea, sweetheart," he said. "I've seen the
same images that you have. But they're still wess'har, same as you,
whatever they look like. You'll have lots in common. You've been
learning their language, haven't you?"
"We all have." She meant her family, the four males and
their offspring who had been taken in by Nevyan when their own
matriarch died. Wess'har didn't appear to have stepchild issues. "But
we still don't know what they're really like. Nevyan says we left Eqbas
Vorhi ten thousand years ago. That sounds like a very long time."
"It is. We were just about discovering how to build
cities then."
"Are you really a backward species, Eddie?"
Cute. And tactlessly
true, and healthy to be reminded of the chilling reality of not being
at the top of the food chain any longer. He had to put his hands up to
it. "'Fraid so, sweetheart. Unfortunately, our technology is way ahead
of us."
F'nar's autumn weather was cool rather than cold but
the pearl layer gave the impression of a heavy frost. Eddie was almost
as used to its optical illusions as to its over-length days and higher
gravity. On this overcast morning, his room in Nevyan's home had been
flooded with a cold white light that made him think he had woken up to
overnight snowfall.
It could have been a magical experience. But the threat
of a war that he couldn't leave behind on the next available flight
stripped the gloss from it. He was heading to the Exchange of Surplus
Things to hear about the next escalation in the conflict with the
humans.
"I still think it's odd that you lot haven't stayed in
contact with each other," said Eddie. Eqbas Vorhi had responded to
Wess'ej's appeal for military support. If Wess'ej represented the
isolationist liberals, the Eqbas were going to make interesting
neighbors. "We would."
"What would the purpose of that be if we wished to lead
separate lives? And your species originated in Earth's tropics. Do you
stay in touch with Africa every day?"
Giyadas had him there. Even the kids here had that
inexorable in-your-face logic from an early age.
The wess'har around him seemed as agitated by the
prospect as Eddie was. He was passing through a phase of being stunned
by how alien they were. The novelty of seeing extraterrestrial life in
the flesh had palled quickly, but that was when he was buffered by the
company of other humans. Now he was the
minority alien, living in an alien household, and he had become
increasingly aware that the only other creature on the planet that
looked remotely like him was Ade. Even Aras--reshaped by his c'naatat
over the years into a theatrical
approximation of a man--was two meters tall and built like an armored
vehicle. And he had claws.
"Doesn't Nevyan worry when you're out on your own,
kid?" Giyadas was probably the equivalent of a human six-year-old. She
kept up with him as he walked towards the Exchange, her tufted mane of
amber hair like a Spartan soldier's helmet. It was like looking down on
a rocking horse. "Did you tell her you were going out?"
"Why should she worry?"
"Well, what if--"
Eddie stopped himself from explaining what could happen
to a small child out on its own on Earth. No, there were no what-ifs in
F'nar. Anyone could walk down its terraces in complete safety. Wess'har
were communal, responsible creatures who regarded the exploitation of
any other animal as the worst possible crime. There were no gangs, no
speeding traffic, and no muggers.
And then--suitably provoked--wess'har would wage war
without pity and wipe out millions. Chilled or
punching--that was how Shan had described them. They didn't have
a middle setting. Humankind was about to find out what wess'har were
like when they were really punching.
"I want to go to Mar'an'cas," said Giyadas. The isanket
was taking her future role as a
matriarch seriously. Talking to her was like blotting old-fashioned
ink, the information instantly absorbed and faithfully reproduced yet
somehow reversed. "I want to see the gethes
from Constantine colony."
"Why?"
"To see why they're different from you. I want to know
why they killed the bezeri."
"They didn't, sweetheart. They helped someone else do
it. And it was just a couple of them. They believe in God and that
makes humans do some pretty strange things."
Giyadas skipped a step. "Sergeant Bennett said it was bollocks
because if there was a real god he
wouldn't let humans behave the way they do."
So Ade Bennett had taken on the mantle of teaching the
wess'har inappropriate English. They'd already absorbed way too much
from Shan, and Giyadas was picking it up faster than any of them.
Eddie shrugged. "But the why doesn't matter to
wess'har, does it? You only care about what's done, not why it
was done."
"Knowing is not the same as caring. If we don't know
why, how can we stop it happening again?"
"You sure you're a kid and not just a bit short for a
wess'har?"
"I don't understand."
"Never mind." Eddie slowed as he merged with the crowd
of wess'har approaching the Exchange of Surplus Things. His instinct
was to grab Giyadas's hand and make sure she wasn't crushed, but the
adult wess'har towering above her gave her plenty of space. He took her
hand anyway and she looked up at him as if he were mad. "So you've been
talking to Ade, have you?"
"He wants his friends back."
"The other Royal Marines?"
"What's royal? What's the sea got to do with it?"
"It's just an old regimental title. They were sea-going
soldiers."
"Will he be our soldier now?"
"I don't know. I don't think any of us know what's
going to happen next."
But Ade couldn't go home again, not with the c'naatat
parasite colonizing his body.
The sergeant was sitting on a packing crate in the
Exchange of Surplus Things, the nearest that F'nar had to a center of
government, a great vaulted hall cut deep into the wall of rock that
cradled F'nar. It was a warehouse where wess'har deposited surplus
crops and took others that they needed, without tally or inventory, and
the bounty was never abused. It was the sort of system that would never
work on Earth in a million years.
Ade didn't look at all changed by c'naatat.
He still appeared on first glance like an anonymous, average bloke
somewhere in his thirties, maybe early, maybe late. It took another
glance to register that he was exceptionally fit and taking discreet
note of everything around him.
But he hadn't turned into a two-meter alien; whatever
the parasite was doing to him, it was doing it internally. He nodded
acknowledgment but didn't get up. Eddie sat down beside him and Giyadas
stood staring into his impassive face, far too close to be anything but
annoying.
"Hi," said Ade, cornered. His voice always seemed too
soft for a man who was supposed to bark orders. "You're growing fast,
aren't you?"
"Are you remembering what Shan remembered?"
"Sometimes, sweetie."
"You must find that a comfort."
Then she disappeared into the crowd to find Nevyan.
They were nearly all males and even Nevyan--shorter than the average
matriarch--stood almost a head above them.
"I think they're about fifty when they're born," said
Eddie.
"They don't so much grow up as acquire more knowledge."
"That's very perceptive."
Ade glanced at him sideways and Eddie knew he had seen
that warning expression before. It was Shan's. Nobody knew just how
many components of a previous host c'naatat
would whip out like a conjuring trick. This looked like one of them.
"I wasn't being patronizing," said Eddie, responding to
the disapproval of a dead woman.
"The kid's wrong. I don't find it comforting."
"You getting flashbacks? Aras does, all the time."
"Yeah, one in particular. A gorilla and the bloody
awful feeling of having let someone down when they needed me."
"I can tell you about the gorilla."
"Later, maybe." Ade had a quiet finality about him when
he wanted to change the subject. "What are we waiting for? Match of the
Day?"
"Live from Eqbas Vorhi."
"They don't play soccer, do they?"
"No. They don't play anything. Apparently Nevyan's
going to be talking to a couple of Eqbas matriarchs. What we're looking
at is a city called Surang."
The huge image in the wall--part of the stone itself, it
seemed--showed a static view of Surang, at once wholly familiar to
Eddie
yet shocking. It was every live news feed from a foreign city that he
had ever seen, and he half-expected a colleague to amble into shot,
adjust an audio implant and ask the gallery how long it was to air.
And it was also a window onto an alien city that was
exotic even to the wess'har around him.
Surang was astonishing. It was the first shot he'd seen
that took in so much of the city skyline, all impossible curves and
billowing organic shapes that reached up into the sky like a growth of
oyster mushrooms on a tree. There was a lot of vegetation; but there
was also plenty of building. If the wess'har in F'nar built to avoid
being seen, then their cousins appeared to represent the less discreet
pole of architectural philosophy.
Surang was a statement, whether it meant to be or not.
It said look what we can do, monkey boys.
Eddie wanted to get those pictures down the ITX as fast
as he could find a way of linking into the feed. The excitement boiled
in his gut.
"Can you imagine seeing our politicians holding talks
in public?"
"You'd be out of a job for a start." Ade scratched his
chin. "And so would I."
Something brushed against Eddie's leg. A displaced
throwback of a thought said cat but there
were no cats on Wess'ej. He half-turned and found himself looking down
into the matte black predator's eyes of Serrimissani.
"Hi, doll," he said. He liked the ussissi interpreter.
She was a sullen, savage, stroppy cow, but she had looked after him on
Umeh when the shit was flying. He owed her. "Missing Jejeno?"
"Not a city I care for," she said. Her little sibilant
girly voice was at odds with her mouthful of needle teeth. He'd felt
those in his shoulder once and he never wanted to feel them again. "And
Nevyan does not ask me to pour beverages, unlike Ual."
"I know it pisses you girls off to be told to fetch the
coffee."
"I am not deceived by your casual attitude. You grieve
for your friend, however casually you refer to her."
Eddie shrugged. "That's how we defend our feelings."
"Aras seems not to feel that need."
"We all cope in our own way." He fought an urge to
reach down and fondle Serrimissani's head like an animal. This is
not your pet. This is a person. He
settled for squatting at eye level rather than gazing down on her from
a lordly height. "So what are you up to?"
"I have advised Nevyan of the isenj way of conducting
themselves."
"She's never actually had any contact with one, has
she?"
"No living wess'har has met isenj, except for Aras and
a few troops."
Met was an odd word to
describe warfare. "I really miss Ual."
Serrimissani slitted her eyes at him, lips compressed.
Her contempt could be pretty transparent. But he still counted her as a
friend even though she made no attempt at small talk while they waited.
Nevyan arrived, with no minders or minions clearing a
path and no visible deference. Nevyan's mother Mestin, once the
dominant matriarch of the ruling clique, watched from the sidelines.
Of all the bizarre facets of the wess'har character,
this was the one that Eddie was finding the hardest to grasp. Leaders
simply happened by dint of their hormonal
dominance, and once they happened, they got on with the job. Wess'har
had unforgivingly high expectations of their informal governors. It was
a duty, not a privilege, and nobody clawed their way to the top or
maneuvered for position. Nevyan had fallen into the role; her primeval
protective instinct had kicked into overdrive when Shan died.
It was both terrifying and reassuring. Wess'har were
militantly altruistic. Eddie wondered how that tendency manifested
itself in their bigger, brasher cousins.
Giyadas, apparently satisfied that her stepmother had
arrived, returned and sat next to Eddie with all the composure of a
duchess.
The two wess'har races didn't speak the same language
after such a long separation but they were learning as fast as they
could with the assistance of ussissi aides. Eddie wondered if humans
would turn out to be the only species in the galaxy that took so long
to learn languages.
"Do I need to do that voice thing?" asked Eddie. "The
double sounds?"
"How will anyone understand you otherwise?" said
Giyadas.
"Do overtones make much difference?"
Giyadas did some rapid head-cocking, staring at a point
ahead of her. "Are say and stay different in English?"
"Yes." She had actually asked a rhetorical question. He
never thought the hyper-literal adult wess'har did that, let alone a
small child. Smart kid. "Point taken. Is
that it? Just pronunciation?"
"No."
"What, then?"
Giyadas looked as if she was searching his face for
something. "If you say ripe fruit, then
one word follows the other. If we say ripe fruit,
we say both words at the same time. If we say someone is eating
ripe fruit, then that is one word too.
There is often one word for the basic things. For new things, we add
words together to express them."
"I can tell you've never been paid by the word," said
Eddie. He shut his eyes for a moment and imagined a three-dimensional
tonal language with a huge and specific core vocabulary and then even
more torturous compounds. Shan had said wess'u grammar itself was
simple. He couldn't imagine how.
"Perhaps I could write wess'u," he said.
Giyadas enjoyed teaching. "Show me your screen."
Eddie pulled out the sheet and set it to graphic mode.
Giyadas prodded a long, four-jointed finger into the fabric and
scrawled what looked like the contents of a whiteboard from a
management brainstorming session, all radiating curves and symbols like
a fishbone diagram. He couldn't see a beginning or end, just a single
maze of symbols. Even Chinese and Arabic were linear. Written wess'u
wasn't made for human brains.
"There," she said. "That is much simpler."
Eddie, a man who lived by his talent for speaking and
writing, was now effectively an illiterate, and a mute illiterate at
that. "Do you people ever do straight lines?" he asked. "Okay, you be
my interpreter. Maybe you can teach me in time."
The wall image changed, tilting down to show a ussissi
draped in multicolored fabric belts. She spoke in wess'u and Eddie
glanced down at Giyadas, indulging her growing sense of preparation for
matriarchy.
"What's she saying?"
"That Sarmatakian Ve will be talking soon. She's the
adviser to the matriarch Curas Ti."
Eddie couldn't imagine any human politician taking a
sensitive call from another state with the electorate watching. They'd
rather screw in public than be seen getting screwed over. But what
Nevyan was doing was a logical, extraordinary extension of the
cooperative way wess'har had evolved. Lying wasn't an option when you
were consciously aware of scent signals, either. Their transparency was
more intimidating than charming.
Sarmatakian Ve and the matriarch Curas Ti didn't look
like any wess'har Eddie had met. They were stockier, darker, and
short-faced; it was as if a designer had been sent in to update the
model for a new market. They looked like… aliens.
"Boy, you people evolve fast," said Eddie. He made a
quick comparison with Giyadas. The wess'har genome was fluid; they
exchanged DNA like some bacteria. "No wonder c'naatat
likes wess'har hosts."
Giyadas gave him that almost canine head-tilt that
showed she was concentrating hard on him. "Do you want me to translate?"
"Sorry. Carry on."
"They say that there is another ship being diverted to
this sector, a larger one. A mission is being prepared on Eqbas Vorhi.
They would like more information in the meantime."
"About what?"
"About gethes, about
Wess'ej, about Umeh. About everything."
Eddie had a thought.
"Has anyone told them exactly what c'naatat
is?"
Giyadas tilted her head further. It gave crosslike
wess'har pupils a better focus on the object of their curiosity. "I
don't know."
"I wonder what they're going to make of it?" said Eddie.
We have waited
many generations for this. The wess'har want us to hand over the two
humans responsible for wiping out the bezeri. I say that we should
agree to this only if they hand over the Destroyer of Mjat, Aras Sar
Iussan. We have never had justice for the destruction of our colony on
Asht, and the loss of millions of isenj lives must surely warrant at
least the same penalty as tens of thousands of bezeri.
PAR SHOMEN EIT,
Supplies Minister,
Isenj Northern Assembly
October 2376, Pajat coast,
Wess'ej.
Mar'an'cas was a striking landmark but it
seemed the most inhospitable place on Wess'ej.
Aras had never seen the island before. It jutted out of
the sea off the coast near Pajatis, well to the north of F'nar, almost
far enough north to be as cold as his home city of Iussan. The
matriarch Bur had sent a guide with Aras and Ade Bennett to make sure
they didn't miss it.
Aras doubted anyone could. It looked like something
huge and shapelessly gray had punched its way out of the sea and then
frozen.
"Looks fucking grim," said Ade.
"Not as grim as remaining on Bezer'ej."
It certainly wasn't Constantine. But then that island
on Bezer'ej had been equally incapable of supporting human agriculture
until Aras created a shielded environment for the colonists. Mar'an'cas
was now secure behind the same type of biobarrier; the colony might yet
rebuild itself, physically at least. Its emotional integrity was
another matter.
I killed Josh. If they say they
forgive me, I shall tell them the bezeri don't forgive him, and neither
do I.
The Pajat guide indicated the shallow-draft boat on the
shoreline. "I can steer the vessel for you," he said. "If your business
is brief, I can wait."
"I'll drive," said Ade. The marine pushed the craft
into the shallows and climbed inboard with the ease of someone who had
spent a lot of time on amphibious missions. He checked the controls,
holding his hands above the touchpad carefully and moving them to see
what response it produced. "I do this for a living. Come on, Aras.
Let's get this over with."
Their business would not be brief.
Aras watched Ade carefully as he steered the boat out
from shore, making a good first attempt at the hand movements needed to
direct the vessel. He had stripped all the marks of rank from his
uniform, from the sergeant's chevron stripes to the little wreathed
globe emblem on his beret. He smelled strongly of anger.
"You're upset about your dismissal," said Aras.
"Too bloody right I am. Twenty-three years in the Corps
and I don't even get the courtesy of a court martial."
"It's what Eddie calls political expedience. He doubts
your command was involved in the decision."
"Ain't that always the way."
"You needn't feel ashamed."
"I don't. I'm disgraced.
That's not the same thing." He opened the throttle with an upward
gesture of his hand and the boat picked up speed. "I can live with what
I've done, but I don't see why the detachment should be dishonored
because of what that stupid cow Neville did."
The spray from the bows threw a hail of icy water in
Aras's face and he turned aside. Even if he was infinitely resilient,
he still felt the cold. He wondered whether Ade really could live with
what he had done because he looked increasingly like a man who couldn't.
This gethes shot
my isan. He helped Lindsay Neville capture her.
His actions led to her taking her own life. I should loathe him. I
should punish him.
Aras had walked away from Ade more than once rather
than let his own grief and rage take over. Human and wess'har
definitions of responsibility clashed within him.
Shan chose to step out of the
airlock, so Lindsay Neville has to pay for that. No--that's a human
view. Neville has to pay for Ouzhari.
Shan had liked Ade very much and wouldn't have wanted
him to come to any harm. Aras liked him too. The c'naatat
that had entered his body carried with it a comforting scent that said house-brother.
Something of Shan was in him and
Aras's primeval wess'har instinct kicked in, making him bond with males
who had his isan's genes. Through the same
instinctive mechanism, he identified qualities in Ade that his isan
might transfer to him through copulation.
Wess'har males influenced their isan's
mating choices.
But there was no longer an isan,
and now there never would be.
"We could have seized Shan from the Actaeon
if they had taken her on board," said
Aras. "She had no need to space herself."
"I think she wanted to be absolutely certain the
parasite was unusable. You know how she hated leaving anything to
chance."
It was the first time in two months that they had
spoken this openly about her death, edging nervously around their
respective raw grief. Shan had left a void. Even Eddie seemed to be
feeling it, and Eddie had never looked like a man who cared about
anybody. Aras suspected it was a façade that members of his trade
adopted. For all his pretence of being untouched, the man was still
recording stories about Shan: the real story,
he called it, not the pack of lies that
others might commit to archive.
Irrelevant, all of it.
The forbidding island began filling their horizon.
There was no vegetation to be seen but as they drew closer Aras spotted
the sloping outlines of shelters. It was a very unwess'har thing to
mark the landscape with visible, permanent structures, but the
displaced colonists had no time to excavate shelters in the ground. He
wondered if the stony terrain would permit that at all.
Constantine's underground colony had taken years to
carve into the rock. He remembered it all. He remembered helping Ben
Garrod, Josh's ancestor, excavate deep into the ground. He recalled how
he took part in building--no, carving--the church of St. Francis and
creating the indulgent but beautiful stained-glass window with its
saint surrounded by animals.
Aras hadn't understood what a saint was. Saints often
died for their beliefs. He wondered if Josh Garrod's god would make him
a saint now because Aras had killed him.
He found he was thinking aloud. "I shouldn't blame
you," Aras said. "I killed Josh and he was my friend. His
great-great-great grandfather was my friend and each generation after
him. But when it came to duty I did what was necessary, even if I still
cared for him."
Aras juggled two opposing impulses again. Ade had
played a role in Shan's death. He was also his brother.
Ade's jaw muscles twitched. "You think I did what was necessary
to Shan?" He held his gaze. "Sometimes
I really think you want to kill me."
"I can no longer see situations with a wess'har's
clarity, Adrian. I have become too human. You were ordered
to act, and no wess'har really understands the imperative that humans
experience."
Ade leaned on the control console, making the
occasional casual hand gesture to correct course.
"Only my mum called me Adrian," he said quietly. "Just
call me Ade, will you?"
"Very well."
"And only following orders
is a pathetic excuse. I had a choice and I didn't make it." He rubbed
his nose and suddenly looked out to sea, hands on hips, although there
was nothing out there worth his attention. "You know what I did? I
emptied a whole clip into her. I aimed low because I knew she'd wear
body armor and I knew nothing would kill her and I knew that hitting
her legs could drop her for long enough to get restraints on her. Now,
if I'd had the balls I could have just put a couple of rounds in
Neville and Rayat and nobody would have been any the wiser. Twenty-five
fucking light-years away, no enquiry, no post-mortem. But I didn't. And
I fucking hate myself for that."
Ade lapsed back into silence, head bowed for a moment,
then turned to the helm with a tell-tale glaze of moisture across his
eyes. Eventually he slowed the boat to run up onto the beach. He seemed
to find some solace in using his skills. Aras jumped out to help him
drag the craft a little further up the shore and their eyes met for one
uncomfortable second too long.
"That's all hindsight, Ade."
"Maybe."
"All your indoctrination is to obey your commanding
officer. Human society relies on unthinking compliance."
"Well, I'm not completely human any more so they can
shove their compliance up their arse."
Aras understood his pain, and it was
pain, not simple anger. He had been abandoned too. Communal as they
were, wess'har didn't expend energy on hostage or prisoner retrieval,
and Aras could still recall how utterly abandoned and hopeless he felt
five hundred years ago when he sat in an isenj prison awaiting the next
visit from his captors. He'd done what was asked of him as a soldier.
Then he was simply one effort too many. He felt that even more strongly
since he had known Ade.
His isenj captors had never stopped reminding him that
they always went back for their own.
The biobarrier gave Aras a stinging jolt as he stepped
through it. On Bezer'ej, the invisible fence that maintained
Constantine's ecology and separated it from the rest of the planet
simply prickled on exposed skin. This barrier was several magnitudes
stronger. Nobody was taking chances on contamination, however unlikely
it seemed that anything would cross the species barrier.
There were more than a thousand men, women and children
now living on Mar'an'cas. It wasn't the entire colony. Aras knew that a
few had refused evacuation from Bezer'ej and were prepared to risk the
engineered anti-human pathogen that the wess'har had spread across the
planet as a barrier to further landings.
It had been created from Shan's own DNA. Aras had been
angry that she hadn't told him she had donated tissue, but now he knew
he wouldn't have wasted a single second on anger had he known she would
be taken from him so soon.
"Let me go on ahead," said Ade. "If you get any crap
from them about Josh--"
"I don't require your protection," said Aras. "But I
appreciate the offer."
Wess'har had perfect recall. The memoriesAras had
struggled to ignore now refused to be brushed aside and pursued him,
tormenting him. He remembered exactly how it felt when his tilgir
hit Josh in the left side of the neck and
the impact traveled up both his arms as his blade severed his friend's
head. He could feel it now. He could hear the absolute silence that
lasted seconds and then the rising crescendo of wails and screams from
the colonists who had witnessed the execution. He could smell the smoke
when the ussissi burned the body.
But you helped Lindsay Neville
deploy the bombs that poisoned the bezeri, Josh. You deserved what I
gave you.
It was a very human feeling and it wasn't his. Wess'har
balancing was much more detached. This was a remnant of Shan Frankland,
locked into him forever by the capacity for genetic memory that c'naatat
had taken a fancy to when it passed
through an isenj. Aras wondered how much of his own and Shan's memories
would now be surfacing in Ade Bennett's mind. And he wondered how he
had drawn a line between Josh's complicity and Ade's.
Two figures in dappled camouflage uniforms came into
view, a man and a woman, marines called Bulwant Singh Chahal and Ismat
Qureshi. They weren't strangers. Nobody on this island was. Aras knew
them all.
"Hello, Sarge. Hello, sir." Qureshi looked at Aras and
nodded her head, but her attention was directed towards Ade. "You okay,
Ade?"
"I'm fine. You?"
"We were worried when we lost your signal," said
Chahal. He held out his hand and the luminous green display that was
grown into his palm danced with data. It was battlefield tech, a living
computer and communications device that monitored and tracked and
reported. Human soldiers were full of implants.
Ade held up his own palm: it was blankly normal human
skin, pink and creased and devoid of light.
"Shit," said Chahal. "What happened to your bioscreen?"
"Long story," said Ade. "It went for a walk with my
implants."
Qureshi and Chahal glanced at each other. "Okay," she
said. "What do we do now?"
"Fuck all," said Ade.
"What's up?"
"The bastards have binned us. We're all dismissed the
service."
Aras hadn't known Ade to use profanities as liberally
and unthinkingly as Shan or Eddie; his language was an indication of
his distress. Belonging and not belonging to a formal group seemed to
matter enormously to him. It seemed to matter to Chahal and Qureshi,
too. Their skins, usually quite dark compared to Ade's, took on a
yellow cast as the blood vessels constricted. They weren't expecting
the news. They swallowed hard and fidgeted for a few moments.
"That's what you came to tell us?" said Chahal. "That
we've just been marooned here?"
"That's about the size of it."
"Don't we even get a hearing?"
"Seems not. The FEU told the wess'har they can do what
they like with us."
Qureshi and Chahal looked at Aras as if expecting even
worse news. They knew what he had done to a scientist from Thetis
for causing the death of a single bezeri
infant, and what happened to Josh. He imagined they were scaling up the
consequences for being a member of the force that had managed to kill
many thousands more, and fearing the worst.
"Nevyan says you're welcome to stay," said Aras
carefully. "You won't be punished. Neville and Rayat will, though, when
we find them."
Qureshi's gaze darted between Ade and Aras. "What about
Mart and Sue and Jon?"
"If they wish to join you, they can."
Chahal looked dubious. It was a very distinct human
expression, chin lowered, eyebrows raised. "This isn't how wess'har
normally operate, is it? What's the catch?"
"The catch, as you put it, is that Shan
Chail had great regard for you and that regard is respected.
More to the point, you are not personally accountable for your
commander's actions."
"Neither was anyone in Actaeon."
"Actaeon was given time to
evacuate the uninvolved. Those who stayed on board chose to do so."
Ade stepped in, suddenly the sergeant again. "Chaz,
just shut it. We nuked the fucking place. There's no moral high ground."
Chahal glanced at Qureshi as if seeking a cue. She had
always looked too slight to be a soldier, but she looked even thinner
now. It was a testament to the ordeal of the last few weeks.
"We're really sorry about Frankland," she said. "I just
wanted you to know that."
Aras wasn't sure if the comment was for him or Ade.
Either way he had nothing to say.
"Show me the colony," he said.
They walked in a line behind Qureshi, totally silent.
Two hundred meters away from the shore, Aras got a better view of the
tents. Aras thought immediately of one of little Rachel Garrod's
storybooks with their bright illustrations. The tents were made of
elegant turquoise and green patterned wess'har fabric but sewn to the
colony's design, looking more like one of the humans' carnivals than a
refugee camp.
"Jesus Christ," said Ade. "Hell with soft furnishings."
The Pajat clans had done their best to help out in the
emergency but there was a limit to what could be done to make more than
a hundred farming families comfortable on a rock. Even though the tents
were set in neat lines, it still looked like chaos. The first thing
Aras noticed was the constant backdrop of children crying and the
flapping of fabric in the wind. Then he noticed the smell.
"We're working on the water and waste," said Chahal. "Sue Webster's
really the expert on that. If she wants to come here, we
could use her."
And these were orderly humans. These were people used
to a tough agricultural life and to following rules of survival on a
hostile planet. But they were not the generation that had carved
Constantine colony out of the rock of Bezer'ej nearly two centuries
ago, and they were finding the experience hard.
"At least we've got the hydroponics rigged," said
Qureshi. She turned up her collar against the wind. "We've got salad.
Just in time for winter. Nice."
"The bezeri won't see another winter," said Aras.
He walked into the camp. Faces he knew--some well,
others not--stared back at him and he found himself at the center of a
silence that was spreading like a pool of water. The expressions that
he met were hard and hostile. What else did he expect? He had killed
Josh Garrod, their leader, his friend. They were seeing him as he was
for the first time--an alien, a complete stranger whose ethical code
was
ultimately at odds with theirs.
Aras didn't understand; his actions were even enshrined
in their religious texts. Thou shalt give life
for life, eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot,
burning for burning, wound for wound, stripe for stripe. What
did that mean? If it meant a punishment that mirrored the magnitude of
the crime, then none of them should have been spared, innocent or not;
all the gethes for all the bezeri, just as
it said in their Bible. But there were many things in that book that
they chose to overlook when it suited them.
Ade prodded him in the back. "I don't think this is a
good idea, mate. Let's go."
"I have to see Josh's family."
"Just leave it, okay?"
Aras couldn't. He wanted to, but he had spent most of
his life among these people and their forebears and he found it hard to
cut himself off from them. The human genes in him were mainly theirs,
gleaned by c'naatat from their bacteria
and shed cells. The colonists were almost family. For generations,
before Shan came into his life, they had
been family.
Ade walked in front of him. He held his rifle by the
hand guard and grip, but his finger rested outside the trigger guard.
He was checking to either side as if on patrol.
"They can't hurt us," said Aras reproachfully.
"I don't want any more accidental contamination."
"They know what I am. They've never shown any interest
in c'naatat. But they don't know what you
are."
Ade held his rifle a little higher. "I wasn't planning
on hugging any of them."
"Bastard," said one of the men as they passed.
Aras hadn't experienced abuse for five centuries, not
since his isenj captors had told him what a filthy murderer he was and
that he deserved the tortures he was enduring. He was surprised how
much simple words stung. The two centuries that he had spent ensuring
that the Constantine colony survived were obviously forgotten.
Aras stopped and turned round.
"Leave it, Aras," said Ade. He had been trained to
ignore that kind of provocation. But Aras hadn't, and he genuinely
wanted them to understand why Josh had to die.
The man who had called him a bastard was named David,
he recalled, just like Lindsay Neville's dead infant son. David had two
daughters and his wife taught at the colony school. He took a step back
as Aras faced him.
"Do you know what genocide is, David?"
David smelled of acid fear. "Josh never set out to harm
the bezeri."
"And still they're dead. Your god might care about your
intentions, but I don't and neither would the bezeri. If Josh had
helped destroy beings who looked like you, would you understand better?"
"The parasite had to be destroyed."
"It was a life-form like you or me. Do you know what
else lived on Ouzhari?"
"No."
"And now you never will. Did you think what else the
bombs might destroy, or did you think a neutron device and the cobalt
poison would be selective in their action?"
David stared back into his face. The scent of frying
garlic jostled for attention with the smell of the latrines. "But you know
us. The Garrods were your family."
"My family was Shan Frankland," Aras said quietly. "And
she's dead too."
Ade took his elbow and pressed gently. "Come on. Let's
find Deborah Garrod and get this over with."
Word traveled ahead. Deborah was waiting for him,
standing outside an incongruously patterned tent and holding
six-year-old Rachel by the hand. Her teenaged son James, as square and
lean as his father, watched Aras suspiciously. He stood a little in
front of his mother.
Deborah said nothing. She had a fine-boned oriental
face and fatigue had painted dark circles under her eyes. James
disappeared inside the tent and came out cradling something in his arms.
"We can't feed them," he said. "You take them."
Aras held out his hands to receive two live rats. Black
and White, as he'd named them, were laboratory animals he had
confiscated from Mohan Rayat soon after the Thetis
party landed on Bezer'ej. They had been young animals then, lively and
with fine silky coats, and now they were not. They were tubby and their
fur was coarser. They were aging fast, as rats did, and they scrabbled
to get inside his coat for shelter.
"Where are the others?" asked Aras. He felt the rats
burrow into the layers of his tunic and settle, little hearts pounding.
They had a clean dry scent very much like a ussissi.
"We had to leave them. We set them free."
"But they have no food. They can't digest native
Bezer'ej plants. How could you do such a thing?"
"They're rats. You killed
my dad, and now you're worried about a few rats?"
Even now they didn't understand. Aras wondered how he
could ever have thought gethes could learn
that their lives were no more special than that of any other species.
It was their single defining belief; the colonists even said all gethes
were modeled on their god. It was
staggering conceit. And a god like a gethes
sounded monstrous.
Aras looked down at Rachel. Once she had rushed to
greet him and show him the drawings she had made on hemp paper. Now she
pressed into her mother's skirt, hiding her face.
Deborah gestured to James to go back inside the tent. "Aras, I'm
praying that I can eventually forgive you," she said. "And
I'm truly sorry for your loss."
"Do you understand why I did it?"
"No, Aras, I don't. And I never will."
He thought for a moment that she was going to use the
words punishment and sin.
She didn't, but he knew she would be thinking that he had at least paid
the same price that he had exacted from her.
"Come on," said Ade. "Enough."
They retraced their steps. Aras wondered if the thin
soil on Mar'an'cas could support so many and recalled how long it had
taken to get the soil of Constantine to the correct composition to
support terrestrial crops. It could be done, though. He'd grown the
colony's alien vegetables in F'nar for Shan, to make her feel at home.
He could do the same here.
At the perimeter of the camp, a hail of small stones
landed in front of them. The marines ducked and turned; some of the
colony youths were aiming at Aras.
"Little bleeders," Ade muttered. "So much for our model
community."
Another stone fell short. The youngsters closed the
gap. Ade stepped in front of Aras as if to block the missiles and a
fist-sized chunk hit him in the face. He staggered a few paces and then
recovered his balance.
"Fuck you," he said. "Fuck you."
Blood was running down his cheek. He picked up a large stone and threw
it back hard, catching one of the fleeing youths squarely in the back.
One of the adults grabbed the boy and cuffed him sharply across the
head.
"Sorry," the man called, fist still clutching the boy's
collar. "That wasn't meant for you."
"You okay, Ade?" said Qureshi. She rummaged in her belt
pouch and unwrapped a dressing. "Let's have a look at that."
Ade took the wad from her and moistened it from his
water bottle. He wiped the cut carefully. "No need, Izzy. I'll be fine."
"I heard it go crack," she said. "That's broken bone."
Qureshi took a step forward and he took one back. She
stared at him for a few seconds and then her expression changed; Aras
knew what she had seen. Ade's wound was already fading.
"Oh shit," she said. "Ade, what happened to you?"
"Don't ask."
"You've caught it, haven't you? That's why you
surrendered."
"It was an accident. Shan head-butted me when I was
trying to restrain her. It's spread by body fluids."
"Who else knows you've got it?"
"Lindsay Neville."
"Rayat?"
"By now, who knows?"
"Shit." Qureshi went as if to reach out to him and then
dropped her arms awkwardly as if afraid of contact. "You poor sod."
Aras wasn't sure whether Qureshi was more worried about
the consequences of discovery or Ade's prospect of permanent exile. She
seemed genuinely upset, reeking of agitation. Chahal just shook his
head.
"Are you going to come back to F'nar?" Ade asked.
"How can we?" Qureshi shrugged. "They need us here to
get sanitation and power running. At least we'll be doing something
we're trained for."
"And after that?"
"I don't know. I really don't. What about you?"
Ade glanced at Aras. "I'm staying."
The chances of any of them getting back to Earth looked
so remote as to make the comment superfluous. Aras felt Black and White
shifting position inside his tunic.
"When you want to leave this place, notify me,"
saidAras.
If there were surplus crops after Eddie and the rats
were fed, then he would send them to the marines. He wondered if they
might not all be better off on Umeh.
Ade was silent on the boat back to the mainland. At one
point he took the bloodstained wad of fabric out of his pocket and
stared at it as if the real nature of his condition was starting to
dawn on him.
"If your comrades had returned with you, what would you
have done?" Aras asked.
"I don't know," said Ade. "The last thing you want in
F'nar is a bunch of bored Booties hanging about. Maybe it's just as
well they're occupied elsewhere."
"I realize how distressing this is for you."
"I'm not the one they were aiming the stones at."
"I'm not that offended."
"You looked after that colony from day one. That's got
to hurt."
"I have greater pain to keep me occupied. And
disappointment. What is the one thing none of them asked?"
"Dunno."
"They didn't ask about the gene bank. They brought it
to this system for safekeeping. It was important enough for Shan to be
sent here to locate it. And now it is forgotten."
"But not by you."
"No. Not by me."
If Ade was seeking a new purpose in life, then so was
Aras. This seemed a fine one. When he had settled his scores with
Lindsay Neville and Mohan Rayat, then he would be trapped with
destructively bitter memories unless he moved forward. Restoring
Earth's endangered and extinct species was something Shan would have
wanted: she had cared enough to leave her life behind to retrieve the
gene bank for her government.
It was a very different gethes
government now. The wess'har held the gene bank. It was safely out of
human hands.
Aras wondered what an Earth without gethes
might be like.
Ual's forebears lived in his mind. He searched
the memory embedded in his genes and looked for wisdom from his fathers
and mothers before him, but there was nothing to prepare him for the
situation he faced now. He gripped hard on the data cube that Ralassi
had found for him, still disturbed by its images, and sought courage.
When he walked into the Northern Assembly debating
chamber the roar of angry sound hit him like a shock wave.
The scene before him was more like a street in Jejeno
when something had gone badly wrong--when someone had fallen or another
unplanned event had disrupted the flow of pedestrian traffic and thrown
up chaotic eddies and turbulence. The delegates were milling, arguing,
cursing. A choppy sea of glittering black shapes threatened to engulf
him; he felt he might drown if he slipped from the podium.
Of course they were in disarray. War had never actually
come close to Umeh itself before. They could all remember that and be
certain of the accuracy of the memory. Ual wondered at what point he
might need to play the data in his belt to his audience. Ralassi had
collated archive material on Eqbas Vorhi for him, a little history
lesson for the Assembly.
"Minister Par Paral Ual has been summoned to explain
the current situation," said the Arbiter wearily. "Let him be heard,
will you?"
The chamber grew quieter. Ual could see ministerial
colleagues from other departments huddled in a group, shimmering with
resentment. Alien Affairs had always been regarded as a junior post, a
do-nothing backwater keeping an eye on the wess'har in case they let
their defenses down on Asht, a department autonomous through
insignificance. But now the rest of the regional administration had
noticed him. Ual feared that they might ally to reshape the cabinet.
For a moment he longed for the human solution of a
single executive leader. But Eddie had told him that didn't do a thing
to stop infighting and alliances; it just created more people to stab
you in the back, a situation that Eddie
assured him seldom involved actual weapons.
"We find ourselves in a difficult position,
colleagues," said Ual. And to his utter embarrassment, the words came
out in the human's English, shaped by sucked air.
The chamber really was silent now.
He gathered his composure and repeated himself in his
own language. "These are challenging times. The wess'har have summoned
aid from Eqbas Vorhi to deal with the humans, and if we're not prudent
they'll deal with us too. We've never faced anything like this. We need
to consider radically different solutions."
"Is it true that the wess'har planted a pathogen on
Asht to stop us returning?" The question came from a location delegate
he didn't recognize. Full assembly sessions mixed the representatives
of neighborhoods with regional overseers and ministries, and they all
had a vote. "What are you going to do about that?"
"Absolutely nothing," said Ual. "It's not an immediate
problem."
"And why did they do it now? They've had generations to
do it."
"Perhaps they couldn't, until now," said another
delegate. "Perhaps the humans helped them. And what about Thetis?
What will happen to our colleagues on
board?"
Ual had a sudden nagging thought and dismissed it. Why
now, indeed? He pressed on. "The humans are also subject to biological
countermeasures on Bezer'ej." He paused and corrected himself. Preserve
me, I actually called it Bezer'ej. "My
apologies. Asht. It's fully quarantined."
"It didn't save the bezeri. At least any damage we
caused in the past wasn't deliberate."
"Order!" shouted the Arbiter. "If you don't comply with
the rules of this chamber I'll close the session. Let the minister
speak."
There was a disgruntled scraping of limbs across
polished stone but the delegates shut up. Ual pondered the wess'har
reputation for bioengineering skills. The ussissi said they came from a
world of naturally changing genomes: they knew a great deal about the
fabric of life as well as the manipulation of molecules. He would worry
about that later.
He made another attempt. "Unfortunately our human
allies have placed us in an impossible situation, and I'm led to
question what benefit they are to us."
"Hand over the individuals responsible for the attack
on Asht."
"The wess'har haven't asked for them yet. Do you want
me to deliver them?"
"If need be, yes. That is how their minds work. They
decide who's responsible and take only them."
"And how would you define responsible?
And what constitutes responsible to an
Eqbas wess'har? Do you understand their framework of ethical logic?
They don't invade. They will, however, intervene when asked, and they
intervene robustly and then they never stop
intervening and they create yet another enclave of their own culture."
Eit, the supplies minister, cut in. "We've asked for
wess'har troops to face our justice for the destruction of Mjat for
generations. Aras Sar Iussan lives in F'nar and as long as he does I
say we should not give them the two prisoners they will demand."
"I sympathize," said Ual. "But if we don't comply, we
give the wess'har a reason to take action against us, something they
will find a great deal easier with the assistance of Eqbas Vorhi." Now
he took the biggest risk of his political career. He felt for the data
cube and readied himself to place it in the slot to project images for
his colleagues' education. "If we surrender to our past then we lose a
greater opportunity for the future. Rather than pursue a symbolic feud
with the wess'har, I think we might be better off negotiating with them
to secure their help--the help we once thought we might get from
humans."
"And we invited the humans
here," said a surly voice to Ual's left. "The rest of Umeh won't
forgive us for that. It's made us a potential battlefield. Throw them
all out--now."
Eit interrupted. "If you're suggesting a course of
action, you're not making it clear." He lobbed a small polished stone
in the direction of the voice. There was a loud ping.
"Expand, Minister Ual."
Ual felt he was sliding into a pit, a deep one dug for
him by Eit. But he felt strongly and--as always--that overrode his
suspicion that Eit was luring him into making a rash statement. He
almost certainly was: but it still had to be said.
"Observe," said Ual.
The images that appeared around the walls for the
delegates to watch were old, very old.
They were navigation aids that the ussissi pilots once used, pictures
of approaches to landing areas and locations of ussissi settlements
where they could find accommodation. Some showed fine, wide rivers,
others mountains, others plains and icy tundra, exotic images for the
city-bound isenj. The worlds looked largely wild and unspoiled.
And in each picture, discreet and almost unnoticeable
unless you searched for it, was a building or two in a curious sinuous
style like a fungal growth, almost blended into the landscape.
"There are nearly twenty separate images here," said
Ual. "And each is of a different world that was once heavily populated.
All have been visited and subdued by forces from Eqbas Vorhi over the
millennia. If you want to study the various reasons why they intervened
in each place, I have more history archives. But perhaps all you need
to know now is this. They arrive, they remake the world into what they
see as its natural ideal, and they stay. They create outposts. They police,
to use the human word. And they adapt to each environment."
The chamber was silent. Ual felt he had made his point.
The same silence had descended on him when he viewed the images alone
in his offices.
"Are you saying they might do that to Umeh?" asked Eit.
"I am."
"And the humans?"
"I think it inevitable, judging by this, that they
won't escape correction either."
Ual let the delegates chew over the implications. The
unexpected images were a stroke of theater that Eddie had taught him
without realizing. Sometimes you had to make your point any way you
could.
"Humans are no longer a beneficial ally," said Ual.
"But they still want the instant communications
systems."
"Yes, but they have nothing to give us, except the
return of our diplomatic delegation from Thetis.
Perhaps we should seek different alliances and re-examine all those
things we thought were fundamental to our culture. What matters is that
we resolve our population and environmental problems on this planet and
Tasir Var. Everything else is negotiable."
It was so quiet he could have heard a bead drop from a
quill. He waited for one lobbed in protest to hit him. He waited for
someone to demand that they fight the Eqbas if they tried to
rehabilitate Umeh to their own taste.
But he knew what they were thinking. He decided to say
it for them.
"We have never defeated the wess'har and I'm certain
the Eqbas will ensure we have no chance of ever doing so." He paused,
seeing Eit's quills beginning to lift. "Perhaps they
might be the allies we need. Better that we negotiate a lasting
settlement than live in fear. You've seen evidence that the wess'har can
save Umeh."
But at what price? Nobody
asked. It was silent.
Then the chamber erupted. Ual never got the chance to
say which part of the wess'har civilization he suggested they approach
first. The fact that squabbling had broken out--a rare breach of
self-control for a race used to tolerating each other in crowded
conditions--suggested some of the delegates agreed with him.
He stepped down from the podium and didn't wait for the
vote. As he left, a hail of small stone beads, some red, some blue,
some green, bounced off him with angry pings
as some delegates showed their disapproval.
It would mean a very different way of life, a
terrifying prospect for a species that knew its past intimately and
lived with generations of memories every second. But Umeh needed an
environmental solution. And the prospect of expansion off-world now
seemed impossible.
Whether the vote went with him or not, he was going to
talk with the wess'har. He would surrender himself to chance as an act
of good faith. Umeh had been mired too long in fretting over the
Destroyer of Mjat and other historical wounds. Ual felt the beads under
his footpads, sharp and treacherous.
Beads.
He didn't want to, but he thought of a red corundum
bead he had given a curious Eddie Michallat, one still attached to a
shed quill. It wasn't the only access the human might have had to isenj
tissue. But Eddie was the only human he knew with direct contact with
the wess'har.
Exactly what I might have done
in his position. But he was still shocked by how deeply betrayed
he felt by a creature he thought of as a friend. Did
I misjudge humans that badly?
Betrayer or not, though, Eddie Michallat had saved him
from being forced into a course of action that could end only in
another lost war on Bezer'ej.
Ual swallowed his discomfort and thought of Umeh's
future.
Well, we've still
got incoming broadcast--only five channels, but one of them is sports
so
we can follow the footie. You'd be amazed how sane that keeps you. Our
food situation isn't much better than yours, mate, but at least I
haven't got people singing hymns next door at six in the morning. Is
Ade okay? Next time Eddie comes to Umeh, I hope he brings him. I want
to see Lindsay Neville's face when he walks in.
Message from Mne Mart Barencoin to Mne
Ismat Qureshi
"You haven't lost your touch for stirring
up shit," said Mick, the duty news editor, not looking up from his
sandwich. Then he glanced up at the cam, and he simply said, "Oh…"
Eddie was making use of one of the comms screens in the
Exchange of Surplus Things. Every conversation was effectively a live
outside broadcast surrounded by curious wess'har, and he forgot that
Mick hadn't seen the wall-sized image of Surang before.
"Where the fuck have you
been?" said Eddie.
There was a five-second delay on the last leg of the
relay, the router that joined the ITX to light-speed links near Earth.
Mick's gaze was aimed past him. "What's that behind you?"
"That's a live feed from Eqbas Vorhi. Look, I thought
I'd been cut off for good. I haven't had an incoming call from you for weeks."
Eddie glanced over his shoulder,
counting to five again. He hadn't quite worked out the technology yet,
but the images moved in the wall itself as if the very stone was
changing color and shifting, perfect from any angle. It was one of the
many things in wess'har technology that could have earned a fortune if
they were a commercially minded people. "So?"
"What's Eqbas Vorhi?"
Mick didn't appear to recognize the name. Either the
FEU didn't know about the Eqbas, or they weren't saying. The
increasingly heavy ball was back in Eddie's court. "It's another
planet." He waited for the ITX line to go dead, but it didn't. Perhaps
he wasn't being monitored, or maybe the FEU was curious too. He changed
subjects. "What's been happening?"
One, two, three, four five. "The
Defense Ministry's getting shitty about relaxing its control of
the ITX link, with or without pressure from your isenj chums. Your last
piece really caused political meltdown here, naming Rayat."
"Yeah, I can see that having an intelligence officer
nuke a neutral planet would cause some raised eyebrows."
"The opposition parties ganged up and invoked the
Information Act, so we can at least talk to you, and transmit five
channels of quality programming, twenty-four seven, for the ex-pats in
your neighborhood." Mick's mock sales-patter tone faded and his gaze
flicked slightly to one side, weary and irritated. "And good morning to
any of our FEU monitoring chums from Brussels who might be watching.
Nice to have you with us. So, hot shot, you got anything for me today
or did you just call to whinge?"
Eddie had spent too many years slipping reports past
censors in a dozen countries to be fazed by an uninvited audience. It
simply made him more combative. "I might have another piece ready later
today."
"We could do with something from Umeh Station. I
thought you and the minister were drinking buddies."
Jesus, does anyone know? Does
anyone know that the Eqbas are coming? If I tell
them, will the transmission get pulled? All Eddie's instincts
said don't let them cover this up. But he
wasn't the old Eddie whose blind priority was to get the story first.
He'd started thinking of consequences. The transmission delay only made
it worse.
"I'll try." He groped for the clumsy but effective code
he had used to tip 'Desk off before that something was amiss. "Are you
still mad at me about claiming expenses for that Conqueror stuff?"
He calculated while he waited. The FEU and BBChan
received the ITX output at exactly the same time. He could compress a
report and send it as a burst, though, and then it was a case of who
was faster on the draw. If the BBChan techs were, they could relay the
burst to individual subscribers' personal handsets and implants before
plugs were pulled and lawyers filed instant e-junctions.
And pulling the plug on a public ITX transmission would
be a very visible act, noticed by nervous governments. He had them
either way.
Is this your news to break?
Mick leaned back in his seat and winked. Good: he
understood Eddie was up to something. "You're not still trying to claim
more bogus expenses, are you, mate?"
"I'll send them over when I'm done." When? When?
"I'm sure you'll go through them with a
bloody knife."
"I'll await them with my usual interest."
Eddie closed the relay. Mick would now have techs
standing by to watch for that burst, however long it took to send it.
He didn't know what was coming, or when. And Eddie couldn't warn him.
He couldn't take the risk of being blocked.
Eddie stood with his hand in his pocket, feeling the
outline of his bee cam for a few moments, and wondering if he was doing
the right thing. It wasn't just a bloody story. He was lobbing a
grenade into Earth society.
And if you don't?
The wess'har didn't care what humans knew. And this
wasn't live. He still had time to think about it.
He took the cam out of his pocket and tossed it into
the air as he moved among the wess'har crowd watching the almost
organic skyline of Surang. The bee cam followed him and positioned
itself so he could record his piece to camera right in front of the
shimmering wall. Humans might have yelled at him to get out of the way
so they could watch the screen, but wess'har, being wess'har, simply
stared at him as an interesting addition to the spectacle.
"I'll be as quick as I can," he said, and smiled weakly
in the hope that some of them understood him and that they wouldn't
interrupt. He focused on the cam's tiny red eyeline light and exhaled
slowly.
In three…two…go.
He talked. He explained the image of Surang, and the
contact with Eqbas Vorhi, and the implications for the Cavanagh system
and for Earth. And--finally--he spoke of c'naatat,
and the truth behind the bombing of Bezer'ej, and what had happened to
a disgraced police superintendent called Shan Frankland. He shut out
the peripheral images of curious wess'har and concentrated on
revelations that would kick all other news items off the menu for at
least a day, maybe more.
Then he signed off and fell silent, holding his
position for five seconds.
Eddie knew without looking at the time code that the
piece ran at four minutes, a hefty chunk by news standards. When that
downloaded into some poor bastard's entertainment implant, it would
probably make them shit themselves.
Eddie beckoned the bee cam back to him and slipped it
into the breast pocket of his shirt. The wess'har parted to let him
pass and carried on sorting vegetables and glancing at the image of
Surang.
"Why did you tell them?" said a voice from waist
height, and he looked down.
It was Giyadas. She studied him, head tilted.
"I haven't, yet," said Eddie. "But my government either
doesn't know the Eqbas are here, or they haven't told anybody else. One
or the other."
"Isan says they can't do
anything about us anyway." So isan meant
"mother" as well as "wife." Boss-woman.
"Eqbas Vorhi will go to Earth and deal with the gethes.
It makes no difference whether they know or not."
Giyadas reached up and took Eddie's hand like a regular
human kid. They walked slowly to a corner of the vaulted hall and sat
down on a couple of crates.
"Let me ask you a question, sweetheart," said Eddie. "Is there
anything the gethes could do
that would make you all change your minds about going to Earth and
sorting us out?"
Giyadas considered the idea with much dilation and
snapping of her cross-shaped pupils. Oh, God,
thought Eddie. I'm making the decision of my life
by discussing politics with a child. I'll be plunging Earth into panic
on the strength of a kid's analysis.
"No," she said at last. "How could you change enough to
be acceptable?"
"Not all humans are bad. Shan wasn't bad. What if
acceptable humans ran the planet?"
Giyadas made a little rumble in her throat. "Why don't
they run your planet now?"
Sometimes it took a child to remind you what reality
actually meant.
I can't sit on this.
If he dithered much longer, the situation might shift.
The ITX might not be available. He took a deep breath and pulled out
the bee cam.
"Let's see what happens," said Eddie, and put the cam
back in his pocket.
Ual sat on the polished stone dais in his
office and drew comfort from the silence for a while. There was a
skittering sound from the corridor. Ralassi was coming.
The ussissi stood staring at him as if awaiting a
reaction.
"You missed the vote in the chamber," he said, all
disapproval.
"Well, then?"
"The decision is to demand the return of Aras Sar
Iussan in exchange for the two humans."
"So we launch the war of
demands, do we?"
"You risk your office by even hinting at surrender to
the wess'har."
"My office," said Ual, "might well be rubble if we do
not. And surrender is somewhat of an overstatement."
"Shall I make contact with Nevyan Tan Mestin?"
Ual shook himself a little and considered the rattle of
his blue corundum beads. "I shall do that myself. We both speak the
humans' language. Isn't that ironic? The source of our dispute has also
enabled us to talk to each other directly for the first time in our
history."
If Ralassi was disturbed by the thought of losing his
usefulness as an interpreter, he didn't show it. Ussissi didn't care.
He would come and go as Serrimissani had once done, a reliable helper
but ultimately answerable to nobody but his own kind.
Ual looked at the screen. He needed to choose his words
carefully. Eddie Michallat would have found the words: the journalist
had a curious gift for speaking in such a way that those who heard him
could derive two entirely different meanings from what he said. It was
part of the nature of English, but it was also the skill of timing and
emphasis. Eddie called it weasel-speak and
Ual wondered if he might one day learn it from a weasel, whatever that
might be.
Ual's console showed him the ITX relay status, but he
wasn't sure where the outgoing channel would connect. The image in
front of him changed from a diagnostics screen to a large chamber
filled with wess'har.
Ual hadn't seen so many at one time. In fact, he had
never had contact with one at all. They were extraordinary, long and
narrow, and two-legged.
"I am Par Paral Ual," he said in English. "I wish to
speak to Nevyan Tan Mestin."
Staring into the clustered wess'har faces, he wondered
if any of them understood English. Perhaps he needed to call back
Ralassi after all. He waited: they knew what an isenj looked like and
that, he hoped, would be enough for them to fetch an appropriate
matriarch.
They were still staring at him, huddled together and
making musical noises. Then the little knot parted and a much taller
wess'har with a plume of soft fur on its head--not unlike a
human's--stepped into the foreground.
"Minister Ual," it said. "I am Nevyan Tan Mestin."
A thought that had just been an outrageous idea when he
was speaking in the chamber now had seconds to become a sensible plan.
Others in Jejeno would be listening and he was not the only minister
who had access to English-speaking ussissi--or humans, come to that.
This called for very delicate phrasing.
"Matriarch," he said. "My government wants me to ask
for the return of someone they regard as a criminal."
"As do we. You will now hand over Lindsay Neville and
Mohan Rayat, and we will not give you Aras
Sar Iussan."
Perhaps he should have asked for Eddie. The subtle
distancing of himself from his government's request had not put her in
the frame of mind he thought it might. He steeled himself against
erecting his quills, not because he feared revealing that he felt
defensive but because he suspected it might appear aggressive. "I
understand. May I ask if you would be prepared to send Eddie Michallat
to discuss this with me?"
Nevyan paused. "Why? What is there to discuss?"
"My English is far from perfect." No,
it's quite excellent. I'm proud of it. "Eddie will be able to
interpret some of the more ambiguous terminology. In fact, I'm anxious
that he should. I wouldn't like any misunderstanding of my intent." He
leaned a little on the my. "I promise you
that we will be able to reach a solution."
Nevyan said nothing. Wess'har had eyes, like humans
did, large wet voids in their skins. It was most unnerving to see them
flicker and alter shape.
"One way or another," she said, "the bezeri will have
justice. I'll send Eddie Michallat."
"I greatly respect this gesture." The image faded. Ual
shivered involuntarily and let his quills spring up for a few moments.
He turned. Ralassi was at the doorway.
"That was not exactly the unequivocal demand that Eit
suggested you make," he said.
"I was not present to hear Eit's exact wording," said
Ual, luxuriating in his new-found skill of speaking weasel.
"How can you believe wess'har will negotiate? It's not
in their nature."
"Then why did we ask for the Destroyer of Mjat in the
first place? Did we think we could take him by force? We tried, if you
recall. The definition of stupidity is doing the same thing again and
expecting a different outcome."
Ralassi made a long hiss like escaping steam. "A valid
point."
Ual wondered how transparent his plans were. Deception
was a human behavior trait; and while he wasn't entirely sure how to go
about lying or what use it would be, he had discovered omission.
Genetic memory was a source of strength, stability and
wisdom. It was also a mechanism for becoming hidebound. Ual would have
traded it in an instant for the ability to see the future rather than
the past.
It's time to break the pattern.
Forget national pride, forget feuds. Think about the future.
He was going to defy the Northern Assembly. And he was
going to ask Eddie Michallat to help him do it.
Eddie adjusted the straps that secured him to
the bulkhead of the transport and concentrated on the footage playing
back on the editing screen spread on his lap. Giyadas's earnest little
seahorse face bobbed and tilted in shot, repeating simple wess'u
phrases for his benefit. It was sobering to learn a language from a
child, but not as humbling as her lessons in politics.
"What are you doing?" asked the ussissi pilot.
"Learning wess'u," said Eddie.
"Fool," said the pilot.
Eddie rolled up the screen and put it back in his
pocket.
The pilot's contempt--not unkindly meant, just
stating the obvious--made him more determined.
"How civilized that wess'har and isenj can operate
vessels between each other's space without starting a war," said Eddie.
"We operate their civilian ships," said the pilot. "And
none of us take kindly to being shot at."
"Well, that's one way of achieving peace."
"Both races need us in their way. Yes, there is a
certain stability in necessity."
"Nothing like a strong trade union, eh, comrade?"
The pilot didn't answer. Eddie practiced the wess'u
overtones for hours at a time, hand on one ear as he sang a single
note, listening hard for the different harmonics within it like a
Siberian khoomei singer. Occasionally it split into two notes and he
felt it in his throat and skull, and it was weirdly exciting. He was
still making quite a reasonable resonant aaaaaaahhhhhhhh
when the shuttle landed at Jejeno.
"If you do that on the return run I shall bring you
back here and you will wait for the next scheduled transport," said the
pilot. "Employ an interpreter like everyone else."
"Have a nice day," said Eddie.
Ual spoke English. He spoke very good English indeed
even though he had no true lips or pharynx. He modified the airflow
through his throat as if he had been given a crude laryngectomy. He sat
on the aquamarine stone dais in his spacious chambers like a black
porcupine Buddha, legs folded round him, piranha mouth open in an
approximation of a human smile.
"It's very good to see you," said Ual. He had no
visible eyes either. "How unfortunate that times are so tense."
"You haven't booted all of us off your planet, then,"
said Eddie, sitting on the black slab opposite. Outside the window,
hundreds of thousands of isenj flowed up and down the streets like a
single shoal of fish. "I'd have gift-wrapped Lindsay and Rayat and left
them on Nevyan's doorstep without being asked."
"Where might we boot you?"
asked Ual. "Wess'ej?"
"We still have a ship inbound. Hereward.
They could evacuate."
"You still have a ship Earth-bound. Thetis.
With isenj delegates on board. Both are
many years from their destination, if either ever reach it."
Eddie tried to divine the real message. Wess'har were
literal: they said what they thought and they meant what they said.
Their language was precise--so Serrimissani said--and there were no
double meanings or euphemism. Isenj were a little more like humans.
They liked playing with words even if they hadn't progressed to
outright, blatant dishonesty. And that was why he was here.
An isenj aide skittered into the room with a tray and
Eddie found himself flinching. Oh, God. Spider.
He was hardwired to react to that movement. He tried to see Lij as a
person.
"Thank you, Lij," said Ual. "Mr. Michallat, I have
acquired tea for you."
"That's very kind." Lij backed out of the room and
Eddie's peripheral vision tracked the creature involuntarily.
"Minister, I'm happy to see you again, but given the situation I'd like
to think I was helping the situation rather than just boosting viewing
figures."
"A war twenty-five years away is fiction for your
people. It doesn't affect them now and they have no loved ones fighting
in it. We, however, are a maximum of five years from the reach of Eqbas
Vorhi."
"So you know they're coming. What are you going to do
when they show up?"
Ual shimmered and rattled like a chandelier in an
earthquake. His many quills were decorated with rough-tumbled sapphire
beads. They bothered Eddie, and not just because reporters dreaded
rattling things that interfered with a cam's mike. They plagued him
because they reminded him of a shed quill he had pocketed for the
wess'har so they could have isenj DNA to create the biodeterrent on
Bezer'ej.
He wasn't proud of doing it. If that was how Mohan
Rayat had to live his life, then Eddie pitied him.
"You don't have your camera, Mr. Michallat."
Eddie shrugged. "It's in my pocket."
"Then we are having an informal discussion."
"Yes. Just a discussion."
"Thanks to your news channel, I am aware that Earth is
no more united in its approach than we are."
"Most governments are now demanding direct access to
the wess'har. Years ago we all agreed that we'd share first contacts
with aliens, but that was when we didn't think it would actually
happen."
"Extraordinary how simple communication conduits shape
worlds."
"You understand what's happening at the Earth end?"
"That your own government is in what you call a cleft
stick." Ual's command of English never ceased to surprise Eddie. "If
you prevent access to us, the other nations will turn against you. If
you open up the ITX link, then you lose control of the situation--such
control as you have at such a vast distance, of course."
"This all hinges on how other Earth governments show
their disapproval. It might be trade sanctions, which won't make much
of a dent on a territory the size of the FEU. Or it might be armed
conflict, and that's a different kettle of fish."
"I shall remember that phrase. And who might be able to
take on such a federation?"
"The Sinostates and Africa are strong enough. Africa's
been making the most noise."
"I noted that."
"Then there's the Pacific Rim States. They're vocal but
they're small. The Americas don't play much these days. But Canada
might back the FEU if it decides it wants an excuse for more American
territory. They've really developed a taste for warmer weather." Eddie
scratched the bridge of his nose. "It all depends how they gang up. We
love a good family brawl."
Ual made a gargling noise. It might have been
amusement. "But this would have less to do with our dilemma here than
the opportunity to change the balance of power at home."
"How well you know us." Eddie decided to try the tea.
Without milk--even soy milk--it was mouth-puckeringly tannic. Given the
state of supplies in Jejeno it was a generous gesture. "But don't
forget there's plenty of people who really oppose what we did here.
It's just that they're not high in the global pecking order."
"Do politicians think so many years ahead?"
"They think in days."
Eddie took another gulp of tea. Now here's the
big one. "Have you told the FEU that the Eqbas are coming?"
"Yes."
"Ah." Devious bastards: they were
sitting on it after all. He had to send that report now. The thought
almost diverted him. "How did they take it?"
"They thanked me for the intelligence."
Ual sipped something from his cup, wafting a faint
aroma of something yeasty and savory. Eddie could hear his own pulse
pounding in his ears as he raised the bowl of tea to his lips: the
sound of his own swallowing was deafening. He'd fallen off the
tightrope at last. He'd wobbled a few times, tilting between observer
and player, but he had always felt he could regain his balance.
Now he'd lost it for good. The next question was going
to demand an answer that was tantamount to political advice. It
wouldn't make much difference to Earth, but it might make a huge
difference to Umeh.
"Okay, we've done the dance," said Eddie. "Now what do
you want me to say to Nevyan? You must know that they're never going to
hand over Aras."
"I know the wess'har mean what they say."
"What, then? What do you want?"
"I want you to talk to the Royal Marines at Umeh
Station."
Eddie tried not to jump too far ahead. You couldn't
second-guess aliens. It was all too easy to listen to Ual and think he
was human, and then misjudge him totally. "About what?"
"I would like them to do a job for me."
"Interesting."
"I wonder if they would be willing to arrest--that's the
word, isn't it, arrest?--Commander Neville and Dr. Rayat."
"You're going to put them on trial?"
"No, I intend to take them to F'nar and hand them over
to Nevyan Tan Mestin, and I won't be expecting an exchange of
prisoners. That's what your marines do well, isn't it? They captured
Frankland. They can certainly take these two."
Eddie never knew if he was being observed covertly or
not. That usually didn't matter: there was a silly kid at the heart of
every journalist who got a buzz out of thinking they were dangerous
enough to be spied upon. But it mattered now, because Eddie knew he had
slipped well out of the neutral zone and into representing the
interests of Wess'ej.
"This isn't what your cabinet colleagues have agreed
to, is it?"
"No, Eddie. This is my decision and I don't have the
authority to make it, but make it I have. You see my reasoning here."
"You're putting your hands up. A white flag."
"I think I understand that. Yes. It is, I suppose, a
surrender."
Holy shit. Ual was doing
a Mossad. He was going to kidnap a target and sort things out via the
back door. Eddie thought for a second that there might be a trap laid
for him here, but he considered the world from an isenj point of view,
and it looked terrifying enough to explain rash measures.
"We expected Umeh Station to be destroyed in
retaliation," said Ual. "And I still believe that even if Wess'ej
doesn't exact some retribution, then Eqbas Vorhi will. Ask the
ussissi." He held out a stick-thin arm and offered Eddie a cube of what
looked like gray rubber. "Do you have the means to play back this data?"
"I doubt it. What is it?"
"A little summary of Eqbas activity over the last few
thousand years." Ual turned on his dais and called out. "Lij? Lij,
fetch me a data player, please. Mr. Michallat needs one."
Eddie was distracted by the promise of new information
from the data cube. The history of the World Before seemed more urgent
now. He still found their cultural attitudes to information totally
confusing, because while no race--wess'har, isenj, or ussissi--made any
effort to conceal information, neither did they go to any lengths to
share it. The ussissi confused him most of all. They traveled between
the various worlds but they seemed not to put information at a premium.
Perhaps only humans thought knowledge was power. Maybe
he was seeing the universe through a journalist's eyes, where
information was more than simple currency: it was life itself.
He finished his tea and got up to stare out of the
window onto the streets below. Lij crept in like a spider, clutching a
small box.
Eddie couldn't see any pavement in the road beneath.
All he saw was isenj, close-packed and moving at a steady rate like
flowing liquid. He wanted to walk among them again, but he recalled the
last time he had done that and been swept up helplessly in the current
of bodies. He could see the dome of Umeh Station from here. It was
within walking distance.
"Your government is going to go ballistic when they
find you've given away their bargaining chip."
"But you and I know there is no bargain to be struck
here." Ual made that chandelier sound and Eddie didn't look round.
"This world is a high price to pay for one ancient soldier. It's time
we moved on."
"Humans don't, if that's any comfort. And we haven't
even got genetic memory to keep our feuds alive. We've really got to
work at it."
"Will you help me? If I walk in to Umeh Station and ask
for a Royal Marine, I fear my plans will quickly become
public--especially if they refuse."
"I could ask Nevyan," said Eddie. "But we don't know
who'll be listening on the ITX, do we? Leave it to me."
"Thank you."
Eddie felt a pang of guilt about the use he had made of
Ual's shed quill. But at least he now knew that isenj too could play
double games, and he had purged his guilt a little. "If they agree to
this, how are they going to make contact with you?"
"I'll visit the base, as I have before. Culturally,
we're poor at covert behavior, so the shorter the communications chain,
the better."
"You'd fit right in on Earth," said Eddie.
Things had certainly moved on at Umeh Station.
As Eddie stepped through the airlock and took off his
breather mask, he was struck by the progress in completing the
accommodation sections. He also noticed the tropical temperature.
"Lots more bodies than this place was designed for,"
said the harassed site foreman. "We're working on it. Who you looking
for, then?"
"The marines," said Eddie. "Ex-marines, rather."
"Probably on the building site in the accommodation
section. Big strong boys. Even the girl."
Eddie had never thought of Sue Webster quite that way
but she was engineer-trained and good at rigging water supplies. That
probably required a bit of muscle. He didn't know what Jon Becken's
non-combat specialty was, but he suspected Mart Barencoin's wasn't
construction.
"I always knew you'd make a good brickie's mate," said
Eddie.
Becken looked down from the top of an accommodation
cube with a length of conduit in one hand like a spear, an archetypal
tribal warrior in an incongruous T-shirt that read Fly
Crab Air.
"I'd offer you a beer," he said. "But we're on
rationing."
"How's things?"
"Piss poor as usual." Becken swung himself down from
the roof, getting a foothold on a doorframe. Ladders were clearly for
wimps. "I'll find Mart and Sue. Is Ade with you?"
"He's a bit busy on Wess'ej."
It seemed Qureshi and Chahal hadn't shared the news of
Ade's awkward condition. Maybe they thought that the fewer people who
knew, the better. Eddie looked around.
"Ma'am is in the office," said Becken, shaping ma'am
into an expression of obvious contempt.
"Yeah, I do have to talk to her some time."
"So you've not had any contact with her since she
kicked off War of the Worlds, have you?"
"No." This was too public a place to discuss Ual's
proposal. "Can I have a word with you and the others?"
Becken wiped the palms of his hands on his backside. "Interview?"
"No, a conversation. Private. Has anyone mentioned
Eqbas Vorhi to you?"
"If that's what the ussissi call the World Before, yes."
"Want to do a bit of peacekeeping?"
Becken adopted a carefully blank expression, the sort
Eddie read as a strong desire not to react. "Let's find Mart and Sue,
shall we?"
Barencoin and Webster were fiddling with a water pump.
Webster's rosy, scrubbed face and buxom frame made her look like a
paramilitary milkmaid.
"Eddie's got a dodgy proposal for us," said Becken.
Am I that obvious? "You
might be able to do something really useful."
Barencoin exchanged glances with Webster and Becken. "We're pretty
useful here."
"Do you know that the isenj are talking about
exchanging Lin and Rayat for Aras?"
"I'm glad I wasn't holding anything fragile when you
said that."
"Don't take the piss. Are you up for solving a problem
and saving a lot of shooting?"
"Depends. We've been kicked out of the Corps, in case
you hadn't realized. Sue and Jon weren't even involved. Bastards."
Eddie hoped he had read Barencoin correctly as a man
who nursed his grudges like babies. "Elements in the isenj
administration want to hand over our two colleagues and forget about
Aras, just as a goodwill gesture."
"They're shitting themselves about what's coming over
the hill, aren't they?"
"House-bricks, mate."
"Okay, as long as we don't get shafted again, we'll do
it for free. Compliments of the Corps."
"Really?"
"You thought we'd refuse?"
"You haven't asked me or Jon," said Webster, a little
steel glinting through her bucolic veneer.
"Okay," said Barencoin. "Hands up everyone who wants to
defend hysterical bezeri-killer Neville and slimy spook Rayat and watch
the wess'har turn this place into charcoal. Nobody? Well, carried
unanimously. Let's get to it."
Webster gave him a weary look and stood a little closer
to Eddie. "I think you'll find anyone in
this place would gladly turn them in. Why the secrecy?"
"Because the isenj won't let Lin and Rayat off the
planet unless they get Aras. Ual's being a very naughty spider."
"You trust him?"
"More than I trust the FEU. It's his arse that's in the
firing line."
"And then what happens to us?"
Eddie paused. He was way out of his depth, but Aras had
said Ade's comrades were welcome to join him. That was permission
enough. "You can stay on Wess'ej."
"At least we'd all be together," said Jon.
Barencoin wasn't giving up. Eddie thought that if he'd
been shanghaied by his masters, he'd be wary too. "And are they
treating Ade okay? Why's he separated from Izzy and Chaz?"
Barencoin showed no sign of knowing that Ade had c'naatat,
even though he had been with him when
Shan was captured. Eddie, surprised that Lindsay had kept her mouth
shut this long, skimmed the surface of a lie. "He's fine. They're just
keeping him in F'nar with Aras for a while. I promise you he's okay." Shit,
I'm losing this. "Look, are you going to
do the fucking job or not?"
Barencoin was no more a fool than Ade was. Eddie
wondered why the FEU didn't just dispense with officers and let the
enlisted troops run the show. They'd have made a better job of it.
"You're not telling me something," he said.
"Ade's in a bit of a state about Shan." Well, that
wasn't even a lie. It was simply a fragment of reality from which you
couldn't identify the rest of the picture. "Yes or no?"
"Yes."
"I'll let Ual know, then, and he'll contact you when
he's ready to roll." He gave them a shrug. He didn't know what else to
say. Shit, what did you say when you'd
just trampled over the democratic will of a nation? This didn't feel at
all like the game back home. "I ought to see Lindsay now. I have to do
it sooner or later."
Eddie stood outside the site office for a full minute.
He'd doorstepped everyone in his time. He'd banged on the doors of
gangland bosses and disgraced government ministers; he'd thrust a cam
in the faces of parents and asked how it felt to know that their
child's body had been found. He believed that after twenty years in the
game, there was nothing that could raise his pulse rate or dry his
mouth.
He was wrong. His stomach churned.
Lindsay Neville weighed just fifty kilos, a woman
emotionally wrecked by the death of her baby, a moderate and mediocre
naval officer. She'd been a friend. But he was scared. This wasn't an
interview; it was a rebuke. What did you say to an old friend who had
personally deployed nuclear weapons when there was no war to fight?
"Hello, Lindsay," said Eddie.
She rested her forehead on one hand while she scribbled
on a pad. She wasn't thirty yet but she could have passed for a lot
older. Events had taken their toll. "Hi, Eddie. Slumming it?"
Well, that sets the tone. "Working."
"I've seen. Exclusive from the Cavanagh system. It's
made your career."
"Oh, didn't it meet with your approval?"
She laid the stylus down with exaggerated care and
meshed her hands in front of her.
"Why didn't you say why we
did it? Why didn't you mention what we had to destroy?"
"Because immortality tends to knock murdered squid off
the news agenda, Lin. They had to concentrate their minds on that
first. And nobody can hurt Shan any more. Trust me, I'm running the
story. Soon."
"What was it you said? It isn't what's true that
counts, it's who gets their story in first."
"I know this is going to sound harsh, but if you nuke a
neutral planet you've got to expect some criticism."
"I didn't bloody well know that Rayat had salted the
warheads with cobalt."
"Silly me. Of course. There's nothing wrong with
detonating ordinary high-yield neutron devices. It's adding a side
order of cobalt that makes them bad."
Lindsay's pupils were wide and black. Just above her
neat collar her throat was flushed. "In the last couple of months I've
heard every variation of that line you can imagine. I can't change
what happened. If I could rerun
time I'd still destroy that parasite but I'd do it differently. Do you
think your smart-arse armchair analysis can make me feel any worse than
I do? I'm at rock bottom now. I've got nothing left to lose. Now sod
off."
He had to ask. It was a reflex. "Do you want to talk
about it on camera and put the record straight?"
"It's too late for that. Ask Rayat."
Eddie turned to go. It was amazing how little you could
know about someone even after you'd lived in their pocket for nearly
two years. There were now fewer than ten people alive in his entire
world that he knew well enough to count as friends and he'd just lost
one more.
"I have to ask you this, Lin. Shan really did die the
way Ade said, didn't she?"
The anger that sealed Lindsay's expression crumbled for
a brief moment into something that looked like real regret.
"Yeah," she said quietly. "She just stepped out the
airlock. A real Titus Oates job." She started writing again, ticking
items off a list. He imagined it was some rota or other: she always
found comfort in order. "When are they coming for me, Eddie?"
"I don't know." He felt his plans were tattooed on his
forehead for all to read. He concentrated on reducing his blink rate
but it was very, very hard. "But they're not going to forgive and
forget, are they?"
"I know that. Just tell them when they do to make sure
they take Rayat as well. I won't carry the can for this alone."
Eddie reminded himself there was no reason for him to
feel guilty; he wasn't the fool who'd wiped out a fragile species. But
Lindsay really did seem to think that it was the act of salting the
devices with cobalt that had catapulted the event from essential asset
denial to an act of war. She couldn't see that any
destruction on Bezer'ej would have provoked the wess'har to retaliate.
And the FEU hadn't told anyone else that it had
attracted the attention of a massively powerful military civilization.
What did these people use for brains?
His priority now was to get to an ITX relay and send
that bloody report, something he should have done there and then. Sod
it. The transport back to the shuttle was
waiting for him at the entrance along with Ralassi.
"You have a message for the minister. Yes or no?"
"Yes," said Eddie.
Ralassi said nothing else. He showed no sign of knowing
what Eddie's business had been about, but ussissi didn't get involved.
They oiled the wheels, that was all. The ussissi pilot who hurried him
into his seat on the shuttle seemed equally devoid of curiosity.
"You have a message," he said.
"I need an ITX link out, first," said Eddie. "Can I use
the ship's system?"
The pilot fixed him with a disapproving slitted stare. "Now?"
"Now. Please. I need to
transmit to my news desk."
The pilot handed Eddie a wess'har virin,
a soft translucent hand-sized device that could have passed for a bar
of glycerin soap had it not fired up with lights and images when the
pilot squeezed it into life. Eddie struggled to find the right sequence
of finger positions to activate the interface with his cam.
"Like this," said the pilot irritably, and took the cam
and the virin from him. The ussissi
squeezed the device and the news of Eqbas Vorhi and c'naatat
instantly, silently, reached the relay
close to Earth, and--one, two, three--it
arrived at the BBChan router. Nothing visible had taken place. It was a
strange way to make history.
"Well, that's going to get the shit flying," Eddie
muttered.
The pilot peered at the virin
and handed it back to him. "And now will you take your message? You
have a message here from Nevyan Tan Mestin."
"Read it for me."
"She says it is urgent and personal."
I've just filed a bombshell.
Shut up. "Read it to me anyway."
The pilot settled in his seat and placed the virin
back in its housing on the console. He
made irritated chattering noises.
"I said go ahead."
The pilot hissed.
"She thought you needed to know they have located a
body."
We strongly
suggest that you allow all governments access to the ITX system. It
will aid you in defusing the tension between the FEU and other states.
Your priority is surely both to be assured of the welfare of your
citizens on Wess'ej and Umeh, and to keep open a potential diplomatic
channel between yourselves and the wess'har; and we wish to be
reassured of the welfare of our colleagues en route to Earth in Thetis.
We assume you understand the significance of the entry of Eqbas Vorhi
into the situation.
MINISTER
PAR PARAL
UAL,
Northern Assembly,
to Birsen Ertegun
A halo of shimmering hot air formed around
the Eqbas patrol ship as it slowed and eased itself down on the plain
north of F'nar. It was the worst possible time it could have chosen to
arrive.
Nevyan was anxious to leave. Time would make no
difference to Shan any more, but she had no intention of leaving her
body drifting in space for a moment longer. And she had no choice. The
first of the Eqbas ships had arrived.
"Are you worried, ma'am?" asked Ade Bennett. He stood
to one side of her. She knew he hoped to accompany her to recover the
body, but she had made her position clear. "Historical moment, isn't
it?"
"I'm anxious," she said. "Our ancestors left this way
of life behind. I've changed everything by summoning them here."
"Needs must," said Ade, but she didn't understand him.
The ship was a smooth bronze cylinder tapered at both
ends. A band of brilliant red and blue illuminated chevrons danced
horizontally along each side. Dust rose beneath the hull. It was
remarkably quiet but very, very visible.
Nevyan clutched her dhren
to her throat. Serrimissani, ready to interpret, showed displeasure
with half-closed eyes and arms straight at her sides.
Ade frowned. "They don't believe in stealth, do they?
You're really going to notice that
patrolling your airspace."
"I doubt anyone has countermeasures to trouble the
World Before."
The hatches opened with a long hiss and several ussissi
came out sniffing the air. They stood perfectly synchronized, heads
bobbing in unison, and then went back inside. Serrimissani began
trotting towards the ship.
Nevyan waited with Ade, hoping she would have nothing
to regret later. Serrimissani was now with one of the Eqbas ussissi,
talking to her, mirroring her movements while they talked. Serrimissani
was fluent enough to interpret without the aid of another ussissi, but
Nevyan hoped to use her own hastily acquired command of eqbas'u.
Serrimissani beckoned.
Nevyan was about twenty meters from the ship when she
saw the first Eqbas step out. She was wearing an environment suit. She
was shorter and thicker-set than Nevyan had expected, even though she
had seen their images on screen, and when she took her helmet off she
revealed no tufted mane but close-cropped brown wisps.
But it wasn't a matriarch at all. It was a male.
Nevyan could smell that now. She hadn't expected a male
to lead the vanguard.
His face was short-muzzled and light brown, and
although Nevyan could see the similarities with wess'har features, the
visitor reminded her more of a ussissi. This was a wess'har from her
origins, a world her forebears had left long ago. The branches of the
species had diverged rapidly; wess'har adapted to their environment
fast.
Nevyan shook off her suspicion. Being wess'har was
about what you did, not how you looked or what you said.
Shan had been wess'har: so was Serrimissani.
Ade and Eddie were fitting in as well. Wess'har could take many forms.
More of the crew trailed out, all male, all hesitant.
She stared.
She almost forgot Ade was behind her and stopped dead.
The Eqbas tilted his head, gaze darting between Nevyan and Ade, pupils
snapping open and shut. We must both look alien
to him. But he had familiar wess'har eyes with four lobed
pupils, not the single unnerving void of a human eye. He was kin.
"I am Nevyan Tan Mestin," she said, and waited for some
reaction. "Where is your matriarch?"
The male warbled, and although he appeared to have a
reasonable command of wess'u she had difficulty understanding him.
There was the tantalizing hint of syllables and tone chords she thought
she understood, but whole sentences were elusive and she failed to
grasp them.
Serrimissani relayed the answer in English. "He says he
is Da Shapakti, the commander of this vessel, and he has no matriarchs
on board. He asks if Ade is a gethes and
why he's here."
"Shall I thin out, ma'am?" asked Ade.
"What?"
"Would you like me to leave?"
"No. Stay and observe."
No matriarchs. Why was
this Eqbas male without his isan? Jurej've
needed constant cell renewal from their matriarch, and if this patrol
had been in space for some time then they should have been showing
signs of ill health.
Perhaps Shapakti was. Nevyan wasn't sure what a healthy
Eqbas male looked like.
"Ade is human and has made a great sacrifice for us,"
she said carefully, avoiding the word gethes.
"Why don't you have isan've on board?"
The ussissi chittered. "His isan
is on Eqbas, as are those of his colleagues. He says that if you are
asking about oursan, then they are
medicated and do not require it on patrol."
"What's oursan?" asked Ade.
Nevyan ignored him. This was unnatural. Matriarchs
always accompanied their males on long journeys and families were never
separated. She stared at Shapakti, appalled. And without a dominant
matriarch, where could she begin to discuss the complex politics of
driving back the gethes?
"When will your next ship arrive?" she asked. "One with
a matriarch in command?"
This time Shapakti's answer was intelligible. "Some
days."
She stood staring at him. His gaze still seemed torn
between her and Ade.
"Do you want to enter the city? There's accommodation
for you if you need it."
"For your sake, we stay here."
Nevyan looked to Serrimissani. "I didn't understand
that."
The two ussissi exchanged chatter. "He thinks it would
be better for both societies if each became familiar with the other
more slowly, and they respect your wish for separateness. They have
sufficient supplies."
It seemed reasonable. The Eqbas were here to make
environmental and political assessments, not to fraternize.
Understanding might come later, if at all. She acknowledged him with a
nod and turned to go back.
"You mean to walk?" said Shapakti.
"Of course I do," said Nevyan.
"A vehicle for our equipment?"
"What equipment?"
"Communications, defense assessment, bio-analysis."
He seemed to hesitate and leaned down to the ussissi.
Serrimissani listened to the exchange. "He says you have not yet
answered his question about the presence of the gethes."
Nevyan had to be certain. "Are you sure that's what he
said?"
Serrimissani lowered her head and exchanged more
high-pitched chatter with the Eqbas ussissi. Her eyes were now
disapproving slits. "Yes, chail."
Nevyan took three steps forward and cuffed Shapakti
casually around the head, just hard enough to make her point. Perhaps
he hadn't got the message that he should defer to her. He yelped; she
needed no translation. Now he knew his place.
"Tell him," said Nevyan, "that I have already explained
that Ade is our friend."
Nevyan summoned a ground transport on the virin.
She reminded herself that Eqbas was
industrialized, a world away from the carefully preserved agrarian
simplicity of Wess'ej. That was one of the reasons that her people had
followed Targassat's teachings and sought a separate life of what Eddie
called minimal ecological and political impact.
Eqbas were perhaps more like gethes
in many ways. They expected transport.
"Well, that went well," said Ade, raising his eyebrows
in that human gesture that said it definitely hadn't. "What was all
that about?"
A ground car passed them on its way to the ship. Nevyan
found she was clutching the collar of her dhren
even though the garment was self-shaping, and she made a conscious
effort to lower her hands. "I fear our cousins have a very different
social order to our own."
"Boys only, eh?"
"I don't understand."
"No isan embarked." He had
picked up some words fast. "Come on, what's oursan?"
Nevyan recalled a dead friend posing the same naive
question. She missed her and she wondered how much more she would miss
her as time progressed. "Shan called it shagging."
Ade wafted agitation as he walked. "I think this is
more than I need to know."
"It's not copulation in the sense of reproductive
activity, but as Shan said, it's as near as makes
no odds. We exchange and repair DNA during oursan.
Without it, the cells of the male deteriorate."
"Ah," said Ade.
His face was much pinker now. Nevyan had seen that
before. Embarrassment. "I didn't suggest
that it was unpleasant. Far from it. But it seems the Eqbas have medication
instead."
Ade said nothing more until they reached F'nar. Nevyan
realized it was the mention of Shan that had silenced him, because he
didn't seem the kind of human who was easily embarrassed by bodily
functions. They sat on crates with Serrimissani in the Exchange of
Surplus Things and watched the Eqbas crew--six males--set up equipment
at
the back of the hall, supervised by Serrimissani.
"Are you sure you don't want me orAras to come with
you, ma'am?" asked Ade, returning to his main preoccupation.
He didn't use the word bodies.
Shan and Vijissi were drifting in the void somewhere between Bezer'ej
and the isenj homeworld of Umeh, and Nevyan wondered if Ade ever
remembered that the ussissi aide had died with Shan rather than abandon
her. Mestin had asked him to stay at her side, no matter what.
"You have preparations to make here, Ade. We won't be
away more than a few days."
"Understood, ma'am." He paused and looked at her as if
expecting her to change her mind if he was persistent enough. His
clutched his green fabric headdress in both hands and he was twisting
it like a cleaning rag. "You said I was your friend."
"You are."
"Why? I don't understand why you don't blame me for
Shan's death. And the bezeri."
"You persist in asking this."
"It's because I don't understand."
"Even wess'har have to draw a line somewhere in the
chain of circumstances, or we would execute parents and grandparents
for a child's wrongdoings. Your superiors set the bombs. Shan chose to
die." Nevyan, broken-hearted again, inhaled sharply to smell Shan in
Ade's scent. "And I know that if she were alive now, and I went to
punish you, she would stand in my way and defend you."
Ade smoothed out his headdress and put it in his
pocket. "Okay, ma'am."
Serrimissani approached as he walked out of earshot. "It's as well
that the crew has no matriarchs on board," she said. "Or
you might be criticized for leaving at such a critical time."
"Recovering my friends is important."
"For Aras and Ade," said Serrimissani.
"For me. Because I said I
would."
Nevyan wondered if she should have sent Aras instead,
however traumatic it would be for him. No.
She had promised.
She would make the retrieval quickly, though. These
were testing times for F'nar and all Wess'ej.
Da Shapakti was fascinated by the concern shown
for Shan's corpse. Aras had begun learning Eqbas'u with Serrimissani's
mediation and there was one word that leapt out at him above all
others: suta'ej.
Shapakti used it a lot. It meant of
use. The Eqbas commander trailed after Aras and Ade through the
center of F'nar, making urgent sounds and smelling of excitement.
"His crew don't say much," said Ade, glancing behind
him. He would always be a soldier, sizing up risk, needing to know
terrain and locations. Aras thought it was a good habit to retain. "You
sure it's safe to let them go through your archives?"
"There is no harm in knowledge."
"That's not how we see it."
"Wess'har don't use knowledge as gethes
do." Aras had agreed to follow Ade without knowing where he was going.
Ade had a digging tool in one hand, a soldier's implement that folded
in half. "What do you wish to show me?"
"Somewhere that matters. Something for Shan."
They walked out onto the plain and towards one of the
lava-topped bluffs that dotted the landscape. Shapakti followed. Ade
stopped and turned back to him.
"This is private," he said.
Shapakti looked at Aras, bewildered. He could tell Ade
was annoyed: even if the Eqbas couldn't read his body language, he
could smell him, and Ade now had a distinct wess'har alarm scent when
he was stressed.
"Ade isn't happy that
you're following us," said Aras, hoping he had the right eqbas'u word.
"I want to see," said Shapakti. "I want to find out as
much as I can about gethes."
"This isn't a good time."
"Is Ade c'naatat too?"
"Yes. We both are. The only two left alive."
Shapakti thought visibly. Aras could see the process on
his face. "When you recover the body, may we examine it? C'naatat
is fascinating."
It was a very wess'har attitude, utterly pragmatic and
moral, examining only dead creatures because interfering with live ones
was anathema. It was an approach that humans would have done well to
adopt. But Ade wouldn't see it that way. There was a part of Aras--the
part shaped by nearly two hundred years of living with humans--that
didn't see it that way either.
"What's he want?" asked Ade.
"He wants to learn. He also wants to examine the body
to find out more about c'naatat."
Ade's face drained of color. "Tell him he'll be
examining the butt of my frigging rifle if he so much as looks at her."
He glared at Shapakti. "No. Understand?"
Aras paraphrased. It was from unfamiliarity with
eqbas'u, not diplomacy. "Ade is very upset about Shan. He blames
himself for the events that led to her death, so I advise you not to
raise the subject again. He's a restrained man but when he angers he's
capable of injuring you badly."
"Does that word no
indicate refusal?"
Ade appeared to latch on to the one English word in the
sentence immediately.
"No," Ade snapped. "Absolutely not.
And we're not leaving her for the scavengers, either.
She's going to have a proper burial."
Shapakti stopped where he stood and let them walk on.
Ade glanced back over his shoulder now and again as if checking.
Eventually he stopped. When Aras looked, Shapakti was gone.
The top of the lava formation had precious little soil
on it, barely enough to plant yellow-leaf. If this was the site for
Shan's grave, they would have a hard time digging one. And it would be
shallow.
"This is a cairn," said Ade.
A carefully built pyramid of rocks and pebbles stood a
couple of meters from the edge of the plateau, about waist-high to a
human.
Ade rubbed his nose on the back of his hand. "I
couldn't bear her not having a proper grave."
"A gravestone?" Aras suddenly felt excluded, but he'd
always known that Ade had desired Shan. The marines had teased him
about it. Shan had desired him, too. He wondered if Ade had ever seen
him as an interloper. "I made a head-stone for Lindsay Neville's baby.
It was colored glass."
"You understand, then."
Aras did, but he had never understood why some humans
were repelled by the idea of their bodies being devoured by creatures
like rockvelvets. What did they think decomposition was? Decay and
predation were both consumption, returning the components of life to
the great cycle. Even the colonists of Constantine, who believed
inexplicably in resurrection, adopted the local custom.
"Shan was raised as a Pagan," said Aras. "I don't think
she would mind being left for the srebil."
"She certainly wouldn't like being used for research, I
know that much. Jesus, she was EnHaz. You know how she felt about
scientists."
It didn't matter. Aras thought it was an unhealthy
preoccupation to care about inert, unfeeling remains when the being
that made them beloved had gone. But if it helped Ade cope with his
grief, then it had purpose.
"I will dig," said Aras. He held out his hand for the
folding spade.
"Okay."
"Are you angry that Nevyan wouldn't take us on the
recovery mission?"
Ade looked down at the cairn, arms folded, chin tucked
in. "She was being thoughtful. I know she wanted to make sure Shan was…
presentable before we saw her."
"Have my memories made this worse for you?"
"In what way?"
"Genetic memory. Have you no recollections of her that
have originated from me? C'naatat does
that. Shan had them, so you might too."
Ade appeared to realize what Aras meant. "Not of the
kind I think you mean."
It was a great pity: they could so easily have been
true house-brothers, like wess'har males united by a shared isan.
Aras hadn't missed having brothers for
many years but he needed that comfort now. And Ade's scent said brother.
The soil was hard going. Ade eventually held out his
hand for the spade to take his turn but Aras shook his head.
"When do we ask for Neville and Rayat to be
extra-dited?" Ade asked. "Formally, that is."
"When I've thought of a penalty which will achieve
something beyond revenge," said Aras.
"Long way to go, then, mate." Ade added another pearly
stone to the cairn and stood with his head slightly bowed for a few
moments. "Long, long way."
Nevyan had never traveled further than the
distance between the twin planets of Wess'ej and Bezer'ej. She was now
far beyond that space with Serrimissani for support, marveling at a
starscape for once not wholly dominated by her two home planets.
She had promised Aras that she would find Shan's body
and bring it home, and it had been very hard to find a corpse in space.
The ussissi patrol had patiently followed the extrapolated vector from
the coordinates that Ade had provided, seeking not only Shan
Frankland's remains but also those of Vijissi. They were determined to
bring their own people home, too.
"Will you let Aras and Ade see the body?" asked
Serrimissani. "They were most insistent."
"That depends on how it appears and how presentable we
can make it before we return."
"They are both soldiers. Neither are squeamish."
"I suspect that's irrelevant when the remains are those
of a loved one."
The craft rendezvoused with the patrol vessel, matching
its speed as it followed the tiny speck of debris at a careful
distance. It was Shan's body, still drifting. Nevyan tilted her head to
let her pupils get a better focus as it grew larger in the viewing
screen set in the bulkhead. The object was rolling slowly; then she
could pick out a human shape, exaggerated by the stark brightness and
complete shadow created by Ceret's light. Then it resolved into more
detail, showing a human in a position that suggested a fall, arms
outstretched, legs slightly bent.
There was no sign of Vijissi.
"Bring her in," said Nevyan.
A suited ussissi from the patrol craft steered himself
carefully on the end of a long tether, tracking alongside the body
until he was close enough to secure it with a line. As the shuttle
hauled it in, Shan's limbs appeared to change position, giving the
semblance of life; but when Nevyan concentrated her gaze she could see
she was still in the same rigid pose. Shan's face had no visible
features or hair, just an unbroken pale sheen that Nevyan assumed was
some frozen matter.
Transferring the body from the patrol vessel to the
shuttle was slow. Two suited ussissi laid the corpse on the long bench
running along one bulkhead in the cargo bay and withdrew as the bay
hatch closed and the compartment flooded with air again. Shan Frankland
was nearly home.
"This is hard," said Nevyan.
"I will stand with you," said Serrimissani.
Nevyan looked down at the body on the bench and
struggled to cope.
The clothing was Shan's. It was her informal uniform,
the dark blue jacket and trousers, and it was faded and damaged. Ragged
holes peppered the legs and hips, and the boots were cracked and
peeling. That detail was all that Nevyan could focus on because she
could hardly bear to look at the corpse.
It didn't look like Shan at all.
Nevyan had no idea what was typical for a human exposed
to vacuum, let alone one who carried c'naatat.
The body was emaciated as if it had been sucked dry of all fluid and
flesh. No, this was not a body. It was
Shan Frankland. It was her friend.
Shan was a husk swathed in a milky transparent layer
that coated as much of her exposed skin as Nevyan could see. She was
simply bone wrapped in tight-stretched paper, hands clenched into
fists; her uniform gapped at cuffs and collar as if it had been someone
else's. It didn't look as if her death had been peaceful.
She was unrecognizable. Aras would be devastated to see
her.
Nevyan reached out cautiously and touched her cheek.
The coating was waxy to the touch and it flaked away at the point of
the cheekbone. The skin beneath was lined and dry like efte
bark.
"Fetch me some water," she said. "I'll remove it. I
can't let Aras see her like this. He's suffered enough." She brushed
away a few more flakes. "And these bullet holes in her clothing--I
think
that might be too much for him if he's to remain friends with Sergeant
Bennett."
Nevyan stood and gazed down at Shan and her heart broke
again, just as it had when she had first heard of her death. It had
seemed a terrible sacrifice then and it seemed even more of one now.
Tap… tap-tap-tap-tap.
Something metallic hit the deck, then bounced and
rolled. Nevyan froze briefly at the noise and bent down to see that it
was a small, deformed metal tube very much like the bullets Shan put in
her weapon.
Nevyan picked up the casing and examined it, wondering
how much pain it had caused when it smashed through Shan's muscles and
bones. The number of holes in her uniform indicated she had been hit by
at least twenty shots.
And Ade had said she was still hard to subdue even
after taking that many hits. Shan had been right: c'naatat
was exactly the kind of adaptation that should never fall into the
hands of the gethes' military forces.
Serrimissani brought a flask of water and some cloth,
taking one piece in her hand. "I'll help," she said. "The shuttle is
resuming the search. Vijissi must be in this sector too. He went with
her."
There was another tap and
bounce as a second bullet fragment fell to the floor. Nevyan didn't
think she had moved the body that far, but she had dislodged the
fragment somehow. She began wiping gently at Shan's face with a wad of
moistened fabric.
The eyes were closed, sunk in bony sockets. As more of
the coating fell away Nevyan could see that the mouth was frozen wide
open in one final desperate gasp for air. She almost let herself slip
into that motionless state of shock, the primitive wess'har instinct to
stop and assess threat, but she had to carry on. Perhaps, with more
water and the warmth of the cabin, the body might soften enough for her
to close the mouth and restore some semblance of peace and dignity
before Aras demanded to see it.
Nevyan dabbed at the exposed skin. The water appeared
to be hydrating it in places, easing the appearance of parchment into
something more like human flesh. Shan had never seemed vain, but she
had cared about looking well groomed. She didn't look groomed any
longer.
The coating clung to the cloth and Nevyan had to shake
it off into a bowl. Then she placed her hands gently on Shan's wasted
cheeks, overtaken by grief and regret and anger that she had lost her
after such a short friendship.
"You'll be home soon," she said. Talking to the dead
was a foolish thing that gethes did, but
Nevyan couldn't come this close to her and not speak. "You'll be part
of the world again. And then I'll balance the gethes."
Nevyan had seen gethes
mothers kiss their children. She had even seen Aras kiss Shan; it
seemed a universal human expression of affection. So she bent and
kissed Shan's forehead, alien as the act seemed. The c'naatat
parasite was dead. She could touch Shan
now without risk of contamination.
"I'm sorry, isanket. I
wasn't there to help you."
Shan's eyes jerked open.
Wess'har didn't scream. But Nevyan did.
Frankland sparked
controversy in her first appointment as divisional inspector of Reading
Metro Nine, where she cut crime figures by 75 percent in her first six
months of command. "It's old-style policing," she said at the time. "If
anyone steps out of line, they'll get a clip round the ear, and if they
do it twice, then they can say goodbye to the ear completely." Her
uncompromising approach--typified by frequent use of decitizenization
and complaints of brutality--angered some politicians but earned her
allies in the wider community. "I learned diplomacy after that," she
said. Did she take a more softly-softly approach? "No," she said. "I
just stopped shooting my mouth off about it."
EDDIE MICHALLAT,
One Copper's Story,
BBChan Publishing
Shan let out a long rattling breath that
trailed off into small gasps.
Nevyan knew that corpses sometimes appeared to move or
exhale for perfectly explicable reasons, but this wasn't a trick of
expanding air or contracting tissue.
Shan was alive.
Her eyelids fluttered and then half closed. But she was
breathing.
"This might only be a reaction to temperature changes,"
said Serrimissani. She seemed calm, as if corpses came to life before
her every day. "It is unthinkable that she could have survived so long
in space."
Nevyan shook herself out of her freeze reflex and put
her hand cautiously on Shan's chest. Humans had pumping hearts, strong
enough to be detected.
She felt a brief kick. Then there was another, and
another, and then the thump-thump-thump
became steadier. It was slow, but it was regular; there was a
heartbeat, a real human heartbeat.
"It's also unthinkable that she survived being shot in
the head, or under water, but she did." Nevyan reached for protective
gloves. If c'naatat had preserved Shan in
these circumstances, it too was alive and it was a risk. She regretted
the kiss. "She may be able to hear us."
Nevyan drizzled some water into Shan's mouth from the
cloth and waited. The continuous wheeze spluttered into convulsive
coughing. "Shan," she said. "Shan, can you hear me?"
There was no response, but she was breathing in great
sawing gasps. Nevyan knew almost nothing about human physiology, but
perhaps that didn't matter; Shan wasn't wholly human. She was an
amalgam of whatever c'naatat had collected
and carried with it from host to host and then selected for her
survival. One organism must have had the capacity to survive hard
vacuum and irradiation.
The water was now triggering rapid changes. Shan's skin
was taking on a pink color, and her limbs and eyelids were twitching.
Whatever mechanism had kept her dormant was now kicking her back to
normality. Nevyan hoped that it had kept her oblivious, too; the
thought of drifting conscious in the void was terrifying.
"She needs more water," Serrimissani said. "Perhaps we
need to immerse her. You said she could survive in water."
"Yes, but--"
"Water is probably her immediate need. Then food."
"Shan? Shan, if you can hear us, move your arms."
There was no response. The pilot, summoned from the
cockpit by Nevyan's uncharacteristic shriek, pulled a sheet of fabric
from a locker. "Support the corners, and we can fill this with water
and place her in it," he said. He unbolted a bench and turned it over
to lash the corners of the sheet to its legs. Most of their water
supply went to fill it to a depth that would cover Shan's body. Nevyan
cut her uniform from her, lifted away the ballistic vest, and immersed
her in the makeshift bath.
She weighs so little.
More waxy coating crumbled away and floated on the
surface. Shan's open mouth filled with water and she began coughing and
retching, blowing great streams of bubbles. Her paper-husk frame
convulsed and her eyes jerked open again but she didn't seem to be
focusing. Her limbs thrashed weakly and then she sank back, lips
opening and closing like a suckling child. Her eyes closed.
She was still breathing, though.
"Do we leave her there?" asked the pilot.
Nevyan and Serrimissani leaned over the bath. "The
moment she appears to be in difficulties, we take her out."
"I will send a message--"
"No." Nevyan checked her own immediate urge to notify
Aras. It would be agonizingly wonderful news. However welcome it was,
it would hit him hard after he had come to terms with her death. And if
Shan failed to hang on to life this time, Aras would suffer the pain of
losing her again.
There was also the matter of discovery. The world
thought Shan was dead, and with her the c'naatat
parasite colony that lived within her. A careless message over the ITX,
as Eddie had named it, could be intercepted by anyone. Once they knew
she was alive they would hunt her again.
Nevyan decided the news would have to wait.
They watched Shan intently, counting each breath. She
had curled up, bony arms tucked into her chest, knees drawn up, a
skeleton plated with thin pale skin. Nevyan could see the pulse in her
throat and temples, and the bones that ran out from the top of her ribs
and ended at her shoulders.
"How are we going to feed her?" asked Serrimissani.
"If she can swallow water, she can take liquid
nutrients."
"We have nothing on board."
"We need to get her back to Wess'ej as quickly as we
can."
"No, we look for Vijissi. If Shan survived, so might
he."
Nevyan reached under the water, soaking her dhren,
and lifted Shan's head clear of the
water, noting how much heavier she felt now. She coughed and retched.
Water splashed the deck. "If Vijissi is alive, then he has c'naatat
too and he'll survive until we find
him. If he doesn't, then extra time will make no difference to the
dead."
Serrimissani stared up at Nevyan, an unblinking
matte-black gaze. "Dead, alive, we still search for him and bring him
home."
Nevyan knew better than to argue with an ussissi. But
her priority was to keep Shan alive. C'naatat
or not--miracle or not--she needed to get
her
back to Wess'ej. "We leave the patrol vessel to resume the search and
we return to F'nar," she said firmly.
Serrimissani simply stared back, grim and feral. It was
an uncomfortable moment. A human friend mattered more than a ussissi.
It must have seemed that way to her.
"Very well," she said at last, but reluctantly. "That
seems reasonable."
Nevyan had never trod that fine line between having a
ussissi's loyalty and losing it to the pack instinct. It felt
precarious. It was.
She propped Shan's head on the edge of the sheeting and
wiped her face while Serrimissani hunted for something to serve as a
blanket. The shock and relief of finding Shan alive at all had
suspended her horror at the state of her body for a while and now she
wondered how Aras would react to her physical state.
"There's nothing suitable," said Serrimissani.
Together they lifted Shan from the water and laid her
back on the bench. Nevyan took off her dhren
and wrapped it around her. This was how Asajin had been carried to the
plain to be left for the carrion-eating creatures, with her fine
matriarch's dhren as her shroud.
Serrimissani dripped water into Shan's mouth. She
coughed it back up. "Perhaps her swallowing reflex will return. Her
appearance is improving."
Improvement was a relative term. She still looked like
a long-dead cadaver. Nevyan tried to imagine what it felt like to
asphyxiate and for your body fluids to boil. and to drift in absolute,
indefinable nothing for months. She would have been unconscious. She
was sure of that.
"It's a terrible thing to die in space," she said.
"Even more terrible to survive in it," said
Serrimissani.
Nevyan's home was deserted when Eddie got back.
It was usually a noisy melee of youngsters and jurej've
at this time of the morning, but he made his way through the
interconnecting chambers and found nobody.
Perhaps they'd gone to the fields early because Nevyan
was due back and they wanted to be home to greet her. She'd be in need
of support, he knew that much: it couldn't be easy see a friend's
corpse, even for a matriarch as self-possessed as Nevyan.
There was a heavy finality to recovering the body. Now
he accepted that Shan was truly dead, and the feeling that she might
walk through the door at any time was fading fast. At least he hadn't
imagined he still saw her or heard her, slipping elusively into a crowd
or evaporating on closer inspection. He wasn't sure he could handle
that.
He ladled a cup of water from a bowl and sipped it
while he tried his hand against the console in the main room.
Eventually the screen kicked into life. Without Giyadas to show him, it
took him minutes to find the route into the ITX link to Earth.
Jesus, Ual's actually going to
do it. He's going to defy his own government. Eddie rehearsed
how he might tell Nevyan, with no idea of how she would react. She
might launch an attack: wess'har fired up in a heartbeat. Is this
what I was really doing on Earth? Did I just
spew out information and leave a trail of chaos for others to deal with?
There were no anonymous others to clear up now. He was face-to-face
with the real consequences of his precious truth.
Truth my arse.
With a few prompts from his fingers, the image of the
Exchange of Surplus Things rearranged itself in the smooth stone of the
wall and he was looking at the holding screen for BBChan's router. He
wondered if 'Desk was pleased with the story and braced himself for the
five-second time lag.
"Jesus Christ, where the hell have you been?"
Mick was on duty again, and he didn't
look pleased at all.
"Umeh," he said. "I thought you wanted me to get access
to Umeh Station."
"Forget Umeh Station. You file a fucking story on an
alien invasion and eternal life, then piss off for a day?" Counting to
five evidently didn't help Mick's temper any more than it did Eddie's.
"No follow-up?"
"I got the piece across,"
he said slowly. "No mean feat."
"Yeah, and--"
"Did you run the frigging story?"
"You want to see? Here."
Mick switched him through to an output channel. Eddie expected to see
his own brief bombshell against a backdrop of Surang's skyline but it
wasn't that at all.
The segment started with a long shot of flames licking
through the shattered windows of an office building ringed by a high
wall, or at least it would have been ringed if the wrought-work gates
weren't hanging off their hinges and the wall hadn't been breached in
one place by a truck. The crawler caption said FEU
DIPLOMATIC CENTER HEADQUARTERS, TSHWANE, AFRICAN ALLIANCE. The
stone-throwing, looting crowd provided a better commentary than any
voice-over or textlink.
"Europe isn't flavor of the month in some parts of the
world now," said Mick.
"Just on the strength of my piece?"
"Just on the strength of our diplomatic correspondent
asking the Rim States embassy in Brussels whether the FEU had discussed
the Eqbas Vorhi with them. We're in melt-down here. The emergency
debate in the UN is still running. If we're lucky, it's sanctions."
"Not much they can do apart from sanctions."
"Oh, there is. The Sinostates are talking about taking
over the ITX-router uplink in a neutral
capacity to defuse the situation."
"Jesus." War: it meant nothing else. "They knew,
Mick. They bloody knew."
"You can confirm that, can you? Because they're denying
it pretty vigorously."
Eddie's mouth opened on a reflex to explain that he
could, but then he thought of Ual. All his rules of engagement about on
and off the record had flown out the window. Did it matter? If Eddie
confirmed it, would that make matters worse on Earth, or would it make
them worse for Ual, or both? Wess'har didn't have any problem with
information. Eddie envied them. Knowledge was the heart of his guilt.
But the denial was a lie, and lies were there to be
exposed. It was pure instinct. "Yes, Minister Ual told them. And either
way, the buggers are coming. Does it matter?"
"It does if everyone thinks that's not all they're
being told. I need something down the line from you fast."
"You're being monitored."
"I don't give a fuck. You think the FEU's going to pull
the plug now?"
Eddie was usually so focused on a story that it ate him
alive. This time he had another story, closer to home, and one in which
he was equally mired. Both had started tumbling like an avalanche. He
had to get to Nevyan and tell her what Ual was planning: and he had a
responsibility to events he had helped unleash on Earth.
It never used to be this hard.
"Okay, I'll see if Ual will talk to me about Eqbas
Vorhi on camera. Meanwhile, get a talking head. Haven't you got a tame
biologist to interview?"
"I want it live from the spot, Eddie."
"You want to come 150 trillion fucking miles out here
and do it yourself? I've got a war starting up here."
"So have we."
Eddie made the hardest decision of his life, one that
stripped him of his identity more surely than Ade's discarded stripes
had erased him as a sergeant.
"Later," he said. "I've got something to do that's more
urgent than a story."
And Eddie Michallat ceased to be a reporter, not in
name, but in the core of his being. He closed the relay and left.
Ade regretted that his best blues and his white
Wolseley helmet were seventy-five years in the past on a planet he
could never return to, Earth. It would have been nice to turn out
really smart for the Boss one last time.
He made another attempt to press a sharp crease into
his DPM combat trousers and reassured himself that under these
circumstances it was the effort that counted. You couldn't press
crease-proof kit properly with the heated blade of a fighting knife.
He pulled on the trousers, made sure they were tucked
neatly into his calf-high combat boots, and adjusted his beret. Then he
reassembled his ESF670 rifle and slid the magazine into its catch.
Aras wandered up behind him. "You won't need that."
Ade checked the scope and flicked through the settings.
If he had to fire, it would be at close quarters. The calibration
didn't matter.
"They want a chunk of her? Well, they're going to have
to go through me."
"They know how strongly you feel about it."
Ade didn't trust the Eqbas. He knew how wess'har
thought; fragments of Aras's memory gave him a definite emotional sense
of the wess'har mind. They didn't mess around with life. But he didn't
know how different the last ten thousand years had made the Eqbas. The
fact that they asked to do a post mortem at all worried him.
Aras showed no sign of emotion at all, and that worried
Ade more than the self-destructive rage and grief that had brought the
wess'har to the brink of using a grenade on himself. That was how you
made sure c'naatat didn't try to put you
back together again. Eddie had talked Aras out of it. He could really
use words, that bloke: Ade envied him.
Aras put his hand gently on the rifle. "Shooting is
unnecessary."
"You stick to your job, and I'll stick to mine."
"Ade, I know how hard this is."
"You can't know. You ever caused the death of someone
you cared about?"
Aras made a small huff
that could have been contempt. "I've lost many, many people."
"It isn't the same. I've had my mates die on me more
than once, but I handed Shan over to die.
You think about that. I can't ever put that right, but I can bust my
arse trying to make sure she actually does rest in some sort of peace."
Sometimes he didn't feel comfortable talking to Aras.
He liked him a lot and counted him as a mate, but Aras always seemed to
be thinking things that Ade couldn't even imagine. He made him
cautious, afraid of looking stupid. And he had been Shan's choice, and
Ade hadn't. It put things in perspective.
"Ade, let me talk to Shapakti."
"You think I'm some knuckle-dragging grunt looking for
a fight, don't you?"
"No, I think you're a man who has been through a great
deal of stress. It's not unreasonable to be agitated."
"I'm trained to talk to people. When the talking fails,
I shoot. But I talk first. You ever done urban peacekeeping? You want
to know what you do when you're being stoned by women and children?"
"You threw the stones back, if I recall correctly,"
said Aras. "But I'm sorry. I'm not handling this well." He indicated
the door. "Go on. Do what you feel you have to."
Ade was instantly reduced to shame and embarrassment by
the wess'har's soothing tone. Shit, Aras had lost his wife. His
own grief blinded him to that.
"Sorry. I was well out of order there."
"We've all been well out of order
in recent weeks. It would be insulting to Shan if we were not
diminished by her death."
Aras seemed suddenly calmer for finally knowing where
Shan was. "I'd better be off, then," said Ade.
F'nar was like one of those housing estates they built
to cut down on crime. With its single frontage of curved inward-looking
terraces, everyone could see you come and go; and everyone knew where
Ade was going.
"It's cold," said Lisik, one of Nevyan's four husbands.
He had picked up a little English from Nevyan or maybe even his
daughter, Giyadas. He didn't seem intent on learning more than he had
to. "Vehicle, not walking. I take you?"
Ade thought it was just a pleasantly crisp day, but
wess'har felt the cold. "Thanks."
"No Aras?"
"Aras is preparing the grave."
"What is grave?"
"Never mind."
F'nar didn't have a shuttle port. It wasn't the way
wess'har built, not here anyway, although the pictures of Eqbas Vorhi
seemed to suggest that they once did. The jungle of pipes, conduits and
service buildings needed to handle its few flights was somewhere
underground where it didn't spoil the scenery. Lisik stopped the
vehicle apparently in the middle of nowhere.
"You sure this is the right place?" said Ade.
"We wait," said Lisik.
Ade picked specks off his lovat pullover. He'd wanted a
body to grieve over and so had Aras, but now that it was a reality it
was also a reminder--if he needed one--that he'd fired at least twenty
rounds into Shan's body. He'd taken enough gunshot wounds to know how
much pain they caused.
And she'd head-butted him. She'd sworn at him, called
him a frigging idiot, despised him in her
final moments because he had failed her. He didn't protect her. He
hadn't protected his mum from his father either, not once. No wonder
his dad had called him a gutless little bastard. He was.
People said they would give everything if they could
spend just five minutes again with someone they'd lost, but what Ade
had never known was just how powerful and painful that feeling could be
until now.
There was no sign of Shapakti or his crew. If they
wanted a sample of c'naatat, they could
take it from him. He didn't care any more.
"Not long," said Lisik.
A muffled boom like
shelling in a distant war broke the silence. A craft was beginning its
descent. The small point of reflected sunlight became a blue disc and
then resolved into a blunt-nosed cylinder that spiraled lower and then
descended vertically, kicking up a skirt of dust.
How are they going to bring her
out?
The hatch remained closed.
Wess'har don't give a shit about
bodies. No coffins, no body bags. Oh, God.
The clicking of cooling metal gave way to the chunk-chunk-chunk
of securing bolts being
withdrawn. The three-part hatch door cracked open and the lower section
peeled out into a ramp. Serrimissani scuttled down it and Ade stepped
forward, rifle shouldered, stomach churning, wanting it all to be over
and hating himself for his haste.
"I want you to remain calm," said Serrimissani.
Oh, God, no. It was going
to be bad. He made himself look towards the open hatch. It felt like
every moment before the first shell landed, before the shooting
started, before the ramp went down on the assault craft, except he
didn't feel trained and armed against this at all.
"Get inside," she said.
The shuttle smelled of panic. Ade had never consciously
noticed scent before, and he realized that his senses were changing
just as Aras had said. He wondered if his bowels would let him down. He
knew it happened to plenty of people--plenty of seasoned combat
troops--but he wished it wouldn't happen to him. There was something
about harmed women that triggered it badly. He thought of his father
knocking seven shades of shit out of his mother.
You could have saved her.
Ade didn't recognize what was lying wrapped in a piece
of iridescent fabric on the bench. Nevyan was leaning over it. He
passed through that familiar split second where the rest of his field
of vision was gray fog and he could see just one awful detail: and this
time it was the back of a skull, two cords of tendon flanking a knob of
vertebra.
"Oh God." Don't turn the body. I
can't cope with seeing her face. Don't--
Nevyan's head jerked round, eyes vividly yellow like an
animal's. "She's alive," she said. "We didn't dare send a message.
Nobody must know."
Everything was playing back to him delayed by a second.
She's alive. Ade heard the sound but the
meaning didn't sink in. Then there was absolute silence.
The skeletal, hairless head moved slightly.
Ade felt his legs start to buckle under him. He could
hear himself saying, "How? How? How?" over
and over again. But his training kicked in and he seized it gratefully,
blind to what he was looking at because it was too awful to dwell on.
"Is she conscious?"
"No," said Nevyan.
He couldn't call for medical support. And whatever
Shan's body was doing, it was well beyond the skills of anyone trained
to deal with ordinary humans. If c'naatat
had kept her alive through all that, then there wasn't much else to be
done except to give it some energy to draw on. It looked as if it had
already eaten her alive.
"Get her back home." Ade couldn't work out why his
hands weren't shaking. "Just get her back home. Now."
Aras didn't want to bury the swiss with Shan's
body. While he understood the human need behind Ade's request, Shan had
no use for it.
But I do. It was a
comfort to him.
Shapakti watched while he hacked out the grave, turning
occasionally to look out from the cliff across the plain.
"A corpse can't see the view," he said unhelpfully.
"This is an act for the living, not for the dead."
"Burying it will obstruct the scavengers."
Aras laid down his tools and stood up. "It
was my isan," he
said. "And if you make any attempt whatsoever to touch her body I will
personally kill you, and if I do not, then Ade Bennett will. Confine
your curiosity about c'naatat to me. Do
you understand?"
It was unthinkable for one wess'har to even consider
threatening another. They were a species built on consensus, but Aras's
humanity had swept that aside in its pain. Shapakti cocked his head,
suitably chastened.
"Sir," he said.
"This medication you take. Does it reduce your
emotional longing for your isan?"
"A little."
Aras had wanted to hear the word completely.
But it was unlikely the drug would have breached his c'naatat's
robust defenses anyway. Perhaps
trying to forget his pain was an act of betrayal. He knelt down and sat
back on his heels, waiting.
"What is the red object?" asked Shapakti.
"A swiss. A device for communications and data
gathering, among other things. It belonged to Shan Frankland and she
valued it greatly."
"May I examine it?"
"No."
It wasn't Shapakti's fault. He was simply being
wess'har--pragmatic, exact, unsentimental. The position of the grave
didn't matter and neither did the swiss; nothing of Shan would be here
to enjoy the vista, and Aras had embedded memories of his isan
more vivid than those in the swiss. But the
modest ritual mattered. That much of him
was human, he realized.
So he waited. Shapakti said nothing and waited with him.
Irregular scrambling footsteps and tumbling pebbles
announced an approach. Aras expected Ade to appear with the body, and
he braced himself for the moment, ashamed of dreading it, but it was
Serrimissani. She was running. The wind was in the wrong direction to
smell her state of mind but Aras needed no scent cues to tell she was
extremely agitated.
He feared the worst, but under the circumstances he was
at a loss to think what worse could
possibly be.
Maybe they hadn't found Shan after all. The thought was
agonizing. He had prepared himself for this and it had not been easy.
He stood up.
"What is it?"
Serrimissani stood panting. "This will be hard for you
to understand," she said. "You must come with me. Shan is alive."
She wasn't making sense. "Don't. Don't do this to me."
"She is alive."
"That's impossible."
Serrimissani turned to go back down the slope but Aras
grabbed her by her decorative belts, jerking her back. Shapakti was
forgotten for the moment. "She cannot be
alive. Unless Ade lied."
"He didn't."
Shapakti didn't appear to understand the conversation
but he had certainly reacted to the excitement. He was standing
absolutely wess'har-still, alarmed: Aras was seeing more similarities
than differences in the Eqbas now. He beckoned to him.
"Go back to your crew," Aras said carefully. "We have
no body to bury."
"Were the ussissi mistaken?"
"That's not your concern. Go."
Serrimissani was wrong.
There was a rational explanation for this, and it would be
heartbreaking. Aras prepared himself for the distress and waited until
Shapakti was well out of earshot. He turned on her, angry in
anticipation of having his hopes dashed.
"Not even c'naatat can
survive in space."
"But she has. We can argue
about the mechanism later. Come. But prepare yourself--her appearance
will upset you."
Aras struggled. Over the years he had picked up the
human habit of suppressing his reactions. "And this is not a
shock? That she has survived in space?"
"She's not conscious."
Aras didn't want to hear any more. He wanted to see.
He set off at a run and eventually he
couldn't hear anyone behind him. He didn't look back.
Shapakti, I don't
understand. Why do humans say they were only following orders? Don't
they understand that it is even worse to obey a
bad order than to give one? I suspect that they delight in being
loathsome.
SARMATAKIAN
VE,
adviser to the council of matriarchs of Eqbas Vorhi,
commonly known as the World Before
Eddie sprinted along the terraces. His
lungs were screaming for air but he needed to find Nevyan. She wasn't
responding to the virin.
He headed for Aras's home. He needed not
to be alone with what was now in his head.
Wess'har going about their business took no notice of him, probably
thinking he was like Ade, just running for fun.
Fun. What the fuck's happened to
me in the last two years? How did I get to be a go-between? His
lungs struggled and he envied Ade his fitness. Maybe
that's all I ever was, a fucking messenger boy.
One wess'har stepped out and stopped him, catching him
roughly by the shoulder. "Body is home," he said. "Understand? Body is
home."
Eddie understood all right. They said things came in
threes. Ual was kicking over the traces, the FEU was under siege, and
now Shan Frankland's body had been brought back for burial. However
urgent his problems, Ade and Aras would be in far worse shape than he
ever would.
"I understand," said Eddie. "Thanks."
He set off again, this time at a prudent fast walk. He
wiped the sweat off his face and pushed cautiously on Aras's door.
There was no sign of Nevyan. He could hear Ade and Aras talking.
"Is she responding at all? Is anyone thinking of how we
feed her?"
"Nevyan said she's coughing up water."
"Can she swallow?"
"Not as such."
"What do you mean, not as such?"
"Best she could do was drip it down her throat."
It didn't make sense.
Eddie walked into the small side chamber that had been
Ade's room. Why's he taken the body in there?
Aras and Ade were leaning over the bed and they both straightened up
and turned to look at Eddie at the same time. And Nevyan was standing
watching them in silence.
Body. Oh God, God, God.
"Eddie," said Nevyan. "I should have called you. Shan's
back."
"I know."
"No, she's alive."
There were days when so much water poured down the pipe
that one more bucketful didn't make you drown any faster. He turned the
word over in his mind. He looked at it and nothing made sense.
"She can't be alive. That can't be her."
Nevyan simply beckoned him forward. "It's true."
Eddie forced himself to look at the body and he heard a
little uhhh noise that he thought might be
her, or even Ade; and then he realized it was his own voice, his own
disbelief and shock escaping from his throat.
Shan looked dead--no, she looked worse than dead. She
looked mummified. She didn't look like a
woman and she didn't look even remotely like Shan. Ade pulled a dhren
across her body, frowning at him. Eddie
hadn't even noticed that she was naked.
"She wasn't drifting?" he asked. He couldn't even form
a question.
He'd seen plenty of dead bodies before. He'd seen--and
smelled--bodies in ditches at the side of the main road into Ankara,
hacked about, misshapen kit people in pieces who only looked real
because there were flies swarming on them that billowed up in a black
cloud when he leaned a little too close to look. A small white dog had
been eating one of the bodies, worrying at the shattered skull of a
young woman. It was a poodle with a blue glittery collar; a civilized
thing gone feral, like all the humans around it.
The roadside dead were strangers. Shan was a friend,
more or less.
"Eddie," said Ade. "It's a shock for all of us. Take it
easy."
"What?"
"Don't ask how. All we know is that she's still alive."
Eddie said alive to
himself several times. He tried not to put his hand to his mouth, but
it was hard.
"Oh my God," he said. "Oh my God."
Real shock was a strange thing. Eddie found that
another part of his brain took over and said training,
training, training. He reached for his camera. It was only
Nevyan's crushing grip on his arm that stopped him.
Ade showed remarkably little emotion. He'd probably
seen a lot worse on the battlefield. There wasn't the slightest hint
that the marine was looking at a woman he cared for, or even that he
had misgivings about having emptied a magazine into her. He knelt down
beside the bed and looked for all the world as if he was praying. Aras
slid his hand under Shan's head and moved the pillow.
Ade stood up again. "I can intubate. If you've got a
tube about so wide, I can get it down her throat." He indicated the
width with close-held fingertips. "I can do basic first aid."
"Well, neither of us can, so that makes you the brain
surgeon," said the part of Eddie that was coping. The other part was
still staring at an unrecognizable skeleton that had once been a woman
who physically terrified him. "I left some brewing kit here. Tubes,
squeeze-bulbs, that kind of stuff."
"Close enough."
Eddie rummaged through the jumble of efte
boxes in the storage area he had once used
as a bedroom and pulled out the coils of tubing and funnels that he'd
filched from the Thetis mission's lab. It
felt like a lifetime ago. His hands were shaking. Alive. Alive.
He'd almost forgotten the news he'd run
up the terrace to break.
"It's not sterile," he said.
"I don't think that's going to make any difference
now," said Ade. He uncoiled the tubing and measured a length against
Shan's chest. "Why don't you find something liquid enough to pass
through this?"
"Force-feeding will hurt her," said Aras.
Ade's shoulders stiffened. Eddie had never picked up
the slightest hint of aggression from him but he was sensing it now.
"Yeah, but I don't know how to do a percutaneous endogastric tube,"
said Ade irritably. "Besides, cutting a hole in her abdominal wall will
hurt her a fucking sight more, so just get the nutrient, will you?"
There was a brief moment of silence. Then Aras simply
walked away.
Ade stretched out the tube and took the end in one
hand. "Eddie, can you steady her head so I can get the tube in her
nose?"
"Okay…" Oh God. "How do
you know when it's in the stomach?"
"Stomach contents siphoning back."
"Has she got any?"
"Look, I've measured the bloody thing. Halfway between
the end of the sternum and the navel, okay?"
Eddie had never thought of himself as squeamish but
there was something horrific about touching a very frail body. Shan's
scalp was unusually hot against his palm and he could feel the ridges
of bone. He thought briefly of his bee cam and accepted, just this
once, that it was neither the time nor the place. He let Ade work.
"Easy, sweetheart. There…yeah, I know…I know… take it
easy." Ade made a couple of abortive attempts to get the tube past
Shan's throat. For a dead woman, she was doing a credible job of
struggling and gagging. She crunched down hard on his finger: he yelped
and tried to pull free, but she had latched on like a snake and it was
a few seconds before her bite tired and he could withdraw. He wiped
blood on his pants, seeming unconcerned. "Just as well I'm already
infected, eh? Come on… let's try again, sweetheart."
Her struggling grew weaker and eventually he managed to
ease the tube past her throat. He glanced over his shoulder. "Where's
Aras with the bloody mix?"
Aras returned with a glass flask. The contents looked
substantial. Ade seemed unconvinced.
"What's in it?"
"Beet jaggery, the last of the barley flour, and some jay
juice," said Aras.
"You sure you haven't got it in her trachea?" said
Eddie. Oh God. "The tube, I mean."
"I'm sure," said Ade.
"How do you know how much to feed her?"
Ade paused for one beat before replying and it was as
eloquent as a balled fist. "Maximum stomach capacity's three liters,
normal capacity half that, but she's wasted away. So we give her half a
liter slowly every two hours and keep an eye on her. I might even be
able to feel the distension manually, seeing as there's nothing of her.
That's what you do with animals, anyway."
Eddie reconsidered his view of Ade as a simple if
excellent soldier. "Animals?"
"You feel if the stomach's full. I've bottle-fed
orphaned foxes." Ade's face was suddenly different, distracted,
recalling something he didn't like remembering. "At least I did until
my fucking father smashed their heads in."
The room was silent except for the liquid sounds of the
nutrient working through the tube. Occasionally Eddie had glimpses of
what had made Ade Bennett into the man he was and the visions were like
a sightseeing trip to hell. Maybe that was what Shan had spotted. She
had an unerring eye for damaged men who needed her solid reassurance.
And here she was, alive. And she shouldn't have been.
There were lucky escapes, and unbelievable escapes, but this was off
the scale.
"Looks like she's taken it okay." Ade glanced at Aras,
chin lowered. "You want to keep an eye on her while I find something to
secure the tube? Then we can leave it in place for a couple of days and
not have to put her through that each time we feed her."
Eddie noted the placatory we.
He didn't feel that included him. Ade busied himself sorting through
the contents of his pouch belt and seemed to find something in his
emergency medical kit that satisfied him, a small roll of adhesive
tape. He handed it to Aras almost submissively. Aras accepted it, and
with it Ade's silent indication of where he should place the tape to
best anchor the tube.
"Rota," said Ade. "Two hours' watch each. Okay?"
"What if she's brain damaged?" said Eddie.
"I've seen an isenj round blow a hole in her head you
could almost put your hand in and she recovered from that just fine,"
said Ade, wearing his soft voice again. "And if she doesn't pull round
from this--well, then we're going to take care of her for as long as
she
needs it. She's home."
Aras indicated the door with a sharp nod of the head,
effectively dismissing Ade. "I will take the first watch."
Eddie, well used to observing the gamut of emotional
reactions to shocking news, found himself on the terrace staring at his
own shaking hands. The adrenaline was beginning to ebb and the enormity
of events was kicking in, making him rerun the last hour over and over
again in his mind, each time finding the shock of revelation fresh and
breathtaking. Nevyan and Ade joined him.
"I regret not warning you," said Nevyan. "But this was
hardly the information to commit to a public channel."
"Jesus, no."
"It is…extraordinary."
Eddie struggled. "And there was I thinking I had news
for you." He licked dry lips. It was
definitely time for a beer. "You need to know this. Ual's …um… decided
to hand over Lindsay and Rayat, no conditions, but his own government
doesn't know. He's going to get the marines on Umeh to abduct them."
Nevyan didn't turn a hair. "Bold. And sensible."
Eddie, one duty done, fretted over abandoning a story. "He doesn't
want a war."
"How will he achieve this? How am I to contact him if
his government isn't privy to this?"
Ade came out onto the terrace with three mugs of beer
and handed them out. Eddie took a tight grip on the smooth glass but
could hardly feel it. He cupped one hand carefully underneath. "I don't
know," he said. "I have no idea. I'll call him--"
"That can wait now," said Nevyan.
They drank in silence. It was a disgustingly yeasty
brew but it did the job. Nevyan sipped it gingerly, just once, and then
stood nursing the mug.
"You can't get drunk, not with c'naatat,"
said Eddie, mouth on autopilot now. "Shan told me so."
"I know," said Ade. "But I have a great imagination."
He gulped it. "Here's to the Boss."
"How are we going to keep this quiet?"
"Shapakti's going to be all over this. But who would
believe us anyway?"
The best stories were always like that. "Who's
Shapakti?"
"The Eqbas commander who landed. Yeah, they're here. I
should have said."
They're here.
Eddie was making a soft landing now, seeing the world
in the familiar context of sound bites and angles again. His brain had
wrapped up the fact that Shan Frankland had survived where absolutely
no complex organism could, and had hidden it while he calmed down. That
shock had made the situation on Earth somehow more manageable.
"I ought to call 'Desk," said Eddie.
He sat down at the small console in the main room, not
quite seeing the detail of the screen, and reminded himself that he had
seen an awful, awful lot of bizarre and
terrifying and momentous things in his career. This was just one more.
Jesus, she's really alive.
It kept washing back over him. No, this wasn't just one more thing. It
changed everything. The BBChan portal opened.
"Mick," he said. "Mick, I'm back."
There was no recrimination over his abrupt exit. "You
look bloody awful. What's happened?"
Eddie swallowed a particularly large lump of yeast and
hoped the most recent events didn't manifest themselves in a large
cartoon think-bubble above his head. "Yeah," he said. "I ran here. I
can get you some footage of the first Eqbas forces. Maybe today."
"Now that's what I call a
story."
It was asking for trouble to promise 'Desk anything,
but he did it anyway. "Sorry I had to run," said Eddie.
"Hey, you were going after the Eqbas. But tell me that
next time, okay?"
"Okay," said Eddie, and knew there were things he would
now never tell a living soul.
Each day, Lindsay made sure that she knew
exactly where Mohan Rayat was.
She was dead already. She just needed to make sure
Rayat got what was coming to him as well. There was nowhere to run on
Umeh, but she was determined that he wouldn't just melt away into the
endless heaving mass of isenj.
Rayat was in the communications center today, an
optimistic name for a single room that wasn't doing much communicating.
He was having an argument, and she had to hand it to the slimeball: he
could keep his cool.
"Why can't I send this?" demanded one of the
contractors.
"Because it contains more than the basic okay message
the isenj will allow past the relay."
"That's no bloody use."
Rayat had that resigned and immovable look of a man
Just Doing His Job. He didn't seem like a spook at all. His hands were
meshed in front of him on the table like a newscaster.
"You can transmit what you like," he said. "But if it
doesn't consist of the exact words �I am fine' or �systems operating
normally' then the relay is set to bounce it back. So I'm told."
"My company needs this information. It's just operating
data from the CO2 scrubs."
"The isenj don't know that it's not a sophisticated
code containing a message that'll provoke the wess'har."
Rayat said it with a commendably straight face. The
contractor, hands braced on the table, let his head drop between
sagging shoulders in submission to the might of alien bureaucracy.
"Okay. It's bloody stupid, but okay."
Lindsay watched the man leave and slid into the space
he had left.
"Reckon we'll get to the riot stage?" she asked.
"Not if the food holds out," said Rayat.
He looked inexplicably calm for a man who had unleashed
careless massacre. Lindsay now had a very different view of the words extinction
and genocide.
Dead bezeri had helped her see that the two were identical if you just
deleted the notion that it was different for humans.
"Is that the management we
or the royal we?" she said.
"We all have to pull our weight here."
"And how do you see your future?"
"About as bleak as yours. But at least we both know we
don't have to worry about c'naatat any
more."
"Well, that's about all," she lied, thinking of Ade
Bennett raising two contemptuous fingers to her as he left the shuttle,
showing her how fast his broken nose had healed. Rayat couldn't
possibly have seen that. It had to stay that way.
And Aras didn't count. Nobody could take a wess'har,
and a wess'har wouldn't spread c'naatat.
But Ade Bennett had it, and he was human, and one day he might be
homesick or desperate enough to find a way of getting back to Earth.
She'd failed to eradicate the risk--and there was nothing she could do
about it now. She'd have to rely on the wess'har to keep Ade confined.
She wondered if she'd have surrendered if it had been
her, or how long Shan would have held out in exile. But Shan didn't
have any of the appealing human weaknesses that made people care and
love and pine.
"So…I seem to recall your screaming your head off at
Frankland calling her every name under the sun because she wouldn't use
c'naatat to save your baby," said Rayat.
"Thank you for reminding me."
"What if she had?"
Lindsay didn't want to hear any more. She was coping
with bereavement, at least in the sense that she hadn't yet fallen
apart. It had been more than a year since David had died, thirty days
old, and with occasional medication she'd managed her bewildered grief.
She knew. What if. Her son
would have been as dangerous and endangered as Shan, and very probably
as dead. And who might have felt obliged to kill him in case he proved
a risk? And what sort of life would he have had, isolated as a
biohazard?
Lindsay walked out.
There was sanctuary in the maze of plant beneath Umeh
Station. She'd put her name down on the rota to dose the feeder tank
for the hydroponics system, recycling nutrients from the rapidly
growing supply of human waste. It was a sudden hard lesson in ecology.
There was adequate water and power, but beyond what could be grown in
this biodome there was no food, and the mission hadn't planned to
accommodate a hundred extra people on the ground. It was a damn shame
that they hadn't had time to unload all of Actaeon's
supplies before the ship was hit.
She went back to the sewage processing plant and
climbed down the ladder to the service ducts and machinery spaces. So
this was what they were planning to build on Bezer'ej when Actaeon
set out from Earth twenty-six years ago.
It was just as well the isenj had chosen to make space for it on Umeh;
the wess'har would have blown it into orbit for daring to intrude on
the landscape.
Among the pipe runs and filter housings there was no
smell apart from new plastic, but the thought of circulating feces was
a psychological deterrent for most. A musical rhythm thrummed in the
quiet motors and intermittent rush of fluid from pipe to pipe, as
soothing as a Zen garden in its way. Lindsay leaned on one of the
separation tanks and rested her forehead on the cool surface.
Poor bloody bezeri. She
couldn't imagine a species so fragile and so localized that fallout
would devastate it, but she had to accept that was the price she'd paid
without thinking. Why did they pick that chain of islands to spawn in?
Why didn't they spread around the planet?
Bloody stupid squid.
She wasn't a monster. She knew
she wasn't. But now she was wondering what monsters really were. She
was so preoccupied with the fear that she might no longer know what was
right and decent that the insistent gurgling of her stomach caught her
unawares.
It was time to eat. Her stomach was gnawing its way out
again, objecting to a meager diet of ten-day lettuce and beans when it
wanted plenty of fat and sugar.
"Boss?" said a woman's voice behind her.
"Sue?"
Webster stood with one hand on her belt and an
apologetic smile on her face. Lindsay thought she looked like the sort
of girl who teachers described as "helpful." But she had her ESF670
rifle slung on her webbing and she hadn't earned a green beret for
being helpful.
"It's time," she said. "You knew this was coming,
didn't you?"
"I did." But she was still suddenly scared. And she
wanted to run. "Oh God."
"Let's walk out of here with a bit of dignity, shall
we?"
"And Rayat?"
"Leave him to Mart."
"He's not going to slime his way out of this, is he?"
"I don't think so."
Lindsay walked out and Webster followed behind. If the
marine could take this with equanimity, then so could she. She wondered
how the wess'har might settle the score and knew that whatever they
did, it would be fast and efficient, which suddenly turned out to be
little comfort.
She really didn't want to die.
Webster kept right behind her as she climbed the access
ladder to ground level and walked through the dome to the entrance. She
looked around to see who had come for them. Ussissi or isenj? Nobody
going about their business in the dome was behaving as if anyone
unexpected had entered.
"Where are they?" asked Lindsay.
And then she saw Rayat. There was something wrong--more
wrong than being taken away by alien troops for some unspecified death.
Barencoin and Becken were frog-marching Rayat towards the door. Small
knots of crew and contractors stood aside to let the men pass, staring
and doing double takes.
Rayat's shocked white face said pain.
As he came within a few meters of Lindsay, she could see he wasn't just
being forced to the door: from the angle of his arms, his wrists were
cuffed behind his back.
"Ready?" said Barencoin. "We haven't got much of a
window. She didn't put up a fight, then?"
"I just asked nicely," said Webster.
Lindsay turned just as she realized that Webster wasn't
accompanying her. She was arresting her.
Nice, capable, helpful Webster held her rifle in both hands now.
"Come on, Boss," she said. "I've got to hand you over
in one piece. Don't do anything daft."
"And what about you? What do you think they're going to
do to you? You think being at the bottom
of the command pile will stop the wess'har coming for you too?"
"Yeah," said Barencoin. "So far, it has."
Rayat stumbled. Barencoin had hold of his collar.
Lindsay was right behind them, Webster's rifle in her back. All she
could think of right then was that she was hungry and that she hadn't
had time to go to the toilet. When it came to it, she was as reluctant
to face death as she had been on Bezer'ej, when she was so convinced
that she was prepared to blow her grenades and take Shan Frankland with
her.
You don't have the guts.
She would never erase Shan's rebuke. The woman's
contempt for anyone with less reckless courage than herself was an
ever-present toxin weakening Lindsay at every turn. Shan Frankland
certainly knew how to haunt you.
"I think I'll hand you over to Ade," Barencoin told
Rayat. "He could do with a laugh."
"Discipline doesn't take long to fall apart, does it?"
said Rayat. "I'm an officer of your government. I was acting legally."
"Technically, so were we, but we still got ours and now
you're going to get yours."
"Think of it as peacekeeping," said Becken. He slipped
on his breather mask as they stepped through the airlock. An isenj
ground transport swept up to the entrance and Lindsay found herself
pushed flat onto its floor, Rayat landing with a thud beside her.
"It's worth it if I see you go first, you bastard," she
said.
"Where are we going?"
"Shut it," said Barencoin, and put his boot flat on
Rayat's cheek. "And keep your bloody heads down."
"Why?" Lindsay just thought riot.
The isenj blamed them. They'd riot if they saw them. There was a
ussissi driving and it didn't turn to look at them.
"I said shut it."
She inhaled a scent of damp forest. She knew that
smell, too: there was an isenj in the vehicle.
"I regret the drama," said Minister Ual's voice. "But
this is more to protect me from my own people's reaction than to
prevent your escape."
"Where are you taking us?" asked Rayat.
"F'nar."
"You don't have jurisdiction over us."
"I'm simply carrying out your government's wishes." Ual
suddenly leaned over them like a collapsing Christmas tree, glittering
with royal blue beads. "My problem is simply that I am not carrying out
the wishes of my own."
Nevyan found it hard to keep the news of Shan's
survival to herself. Secrecy was a very unwess'har thing. Her husbands
had known why she had left in a hurry, and now they wanted to know what
had been done with the remains. Humans had strange rituals. There was a
certain curiosity about a species that preferred to hide its dead. But
they were gethes, carrion-eaters: so they
did such things.
Secrecy was unimportant now that Shan was safe on
Wess'ej. The news reached most of F'nar before midday.
Giyadas insisted on seeing the human who had come back
from the dead. The isanket led her
stepmother by the hand along the terraces, tugging with
uncharacteristic impatience. Nevyan remembered to knock on the door.
Human territorial privacy was a difficult concept to grasp.
"Is she recovering?" she asked.
"We think so." Aras was mixing something in a bowl that
smelled full of evem. "Her temperature is
very high, which is a good sign that c'naatat
is modifying her. She's still not conscious."
"May we see her?"
"She owes her life to your persistence. She would be
glad to know you were here."
Ade was sitting beside the bed with a piece of what the
gethes called smartpaper, a data storage
medium that was a thin white sheet of fabric. He was reading aloud from
it but he stopped when he realized Nevyan was standing in the doorway.
"Just in case she can hear," said Ade, clearly
embarrassed. "Barrack Room Ballads."
Shan didn't look peaceful. She looked agonized and ill,
and there was a transparent tube taped to her cheek and extending into
her nose. But she didn't look as horrific as when Nevyan had first seen
her. The bones in her face seemed less prominent and her skin was
flushed pink.
Giyadas stared at the tube, hands tightly clasped. "What's that for?"
"For putting food directly into her stomach," said Ade. "She can't
swallow properly."
"She must have been very frightened. Will her hair grow
again?"
He ran a fingertip over Shan's scalp. "It's already
growing. I can feel it."
It was hard to think of her as she had once been. Even
though Shan was shorter than most matriarchs, Eddie had referred to her
as a strapping girl, a tall and athletic
female by human standards. It was also hard to imagine that she had
survived in the vacuum of space and returned with any scrap of life in
her at all.
Eddie wandered in and joined the solemn contemplation.
He leaned closer and looked into her face. "Come on, you old bag," he
said. "I bet you can hear me. Come on. Get up and take a swing at me.
Stop slacking."
"Why do you say things you don't mean?" asked Giyadas.
"Because it's easier than getting upset because she
looks so awful."
Ade exuded a strong scent of agitation. He fidgeted
with the smartpaper, clearly annoyed at the interruption. "I don't
think she'd enjoy being a spectator sport."
"That's my cue," said Eddie, and walked out.
C'naatat had turned out
to be even more extraordinary than Nevyan had imagined. She understood
why it provoked such extreme reactions in humans; they were solitary
creatures, competitive rather than cooperative, and c'naatat
had all the makings of a very desirable
military advantage. What it meant to individuals also set on avoiding
the natural progression of life she could only imagine. Their ability
to close their eyes to what would happen to the world outside their
heads constantly amazed her.
And yet there were humans like Shan and--she dared think
it--Lindsay Neville who went to extreme lengths to stop it becoming
available to their own kind.
"Where are her lights?" asked Giyadas.
Nevyan looked carefully at Shan's hands for signs of
the bioluminescence she had once displayed, a legacy of the bezeri.
Shan hadn't been sure quite how c'naatat
had managed to collect that genetic material, and it had distressed her
at first. Giyadas had found it fascinating.
Ade took one of Shan's hands and turned it over
carefully. He could touch her with impunity; he was already
contaminated. "Nothing yet," he said. "They might come back when she's
better."
"There are others who wish to visit," said Nevyan
carefully. "My mother."
"I'm sure Shan would love to see Mestin. When she's
awake."
"Very well. I understand."
"Please don't think I'm being ungrateful, ma'am. You
found her and we owe you everything. But Shan wouldn't like too many
people to see her in this state."
Humans were obsessed with appearance. Nevyan noted his
use of the word we. "A considerate
thought, Ade Bennett."
He gave her an awkward smile without any display of
teeth and went on reading. Nevyan wondered how this odd narrative about
soldiers in ancient Earth wars might be of comfort to Shan, but there
was a great deal she didn't know about her yet, nor about Ade Bennett.
Eventually Aras came in with the bowl of liquid food and more tubing.
Ade put down the smartpaper and stood up.
"Let's leave Aras to it, shall we?" He ushered Nevyan
and Giyadas to the doorway.
Nevyan knew she could do nothing further for Shan but
she waited anyway, watching Giyadas interrogate Eddie on the nature of
human secrecy. Ade, incongruously alien in his landscape-patterned
battle clothing, polished his boots with rhythmic strokes. Eddie said
he didn't need to polish them at all, but he did it anyway. His weapon
was propped by his seat.
"So does everyone know she's back?" asked Eddie.
"I imagine so." Nevyan waited for disapproval, knowing
Eddie's attitude to information, but none came. "Have you told the
other soldiers?"
Ade shrugged. "Haven't seen them to tell them. I bet
Izzy and Chaz have told the others about me, though. Haven't had a
message from them in days."
It didn't matter who knew now. There was nothing the gethes
could do to take c'naatat,
and nobody else wanted it.
"Does c'naatat think?"
asked Ade.
Nevyan considered the idea and wasn't sure if it
disturbed her. "I don't know. It seems to make decisions, but I don't
know if it's aware of its host's feelings any more than we're aware of
this planet. It merely treats it kindly, as do we."
"See, we'd want to find that out." Ade considered the
degree of shine on his boots and seemed to find it wanting. The
polishing gathered speed. "Back home, they'd want to take it apart and
find out all about it."
"We don't feel the need to."
Ade seemed satisfied with the answers for a while and
sank back into the rhythm of polishing. "How did it keep her going?
What was she like when you found her?"
Nevyan cocked her head. "She was covered in a
transparent substance. I assume it offered some protection while c'naatat
kept her in suspension."
Eddie was checking something on his little fabric
screen. He made uh-uh sounds as if
understanding something he had not understood before. "Some organisms
can go dormant and survive in space. Haloarcula
can. So can Synechococcus. Look." He
offered Nevyan the screen. "They can form a coating. Neat."
"And valuable," said Ade. "The top brass would be very
interested in that. The more shit you throw
at c'naatat, the tougher its host gets."
"Nietzsche," said Eddie. "He said that which does not
kill me--"
"Yeah, I know who Nietzsche was, thanks."
"I wasn't inferring that you didn't."
Ade's jaw muscles clenched and he went on polishing,
eyes cast down. Giyadas was transfixed by the spectacle.
"You're a species that likes to keep busy," she said.
Eddie laughed, showing every sign of doting on the isanket.
The tension subsided again.
After a while Ade paused and cocked his head, then
slipped his boots back on and reached for his rifle very casually, as
if he was going to subject it to the same cleaning ritual as the rest
of his equipment.
Eddie paused. "What's up, Ade?"
Ade shook his head. But he stood to one side of the
door, and as it opened he lunged forward and knocked the visitor off
his feet. His rifle was hard against Shapakti's head in one movement.
"Fucking well knock," said
Ade, face flushed. "You can get your head blown off that way." He eased
his weapon away from Shapakti's head and hauled him up by his clothing.
"Like this." Ade opened the door and rapped his fist against it. "Knock
knock. Hello? Come in. Understand?"
"Wow," said Eddie. "Is that an Eqbas?"
Aras appeared in the doorway of Shan's room. "I'll
explain to him. Shapakti hasn't learned enough English yet."
"I'll teach him," said Giyadas. "I can do it."
Shapakti warbled in the odd mix of eqbas'u and wess'u
he seemed to be developing with Aras. Nevyan could follow it more
easily now. "This gethes is dangerous. Why
does he hate me?"
"He thinks you're ambushing him," said Aras. "Humans
have private spaces. And they don't like being observed excreting or
reproducing. This is why we have doors inside this house as well."
"Are the females aggressive? What about the female c'naatat?
We had no idea the organism was so
persistent. Can we--"
"You will leave my isan
alone."
"Esganikan is very curious about her condition."
"Esganikan can wait."
Nevyan intervened. But she shared Aras's anxiety: the
Eqbas had suddenly become intensely curious about c'naatat's
characteristics rather than its control. Shapakti smelled excited.
"Shan Chail will tear
you up for arse paper if you irritate her,"
said Nevyan, hoping she'd recalled the phrase correctly. "Why have you
come here?"
Shapakti appeared to grasp the broad meaning. "To
inform you that there is a vessel on a direct approach from Umeh."
"The ussissi fly shuttles between worlds all the time."
"This one carries an isenj minister with two gethes
prisoners. He wishes to talk to Nevyan."
Nevyan looked at Eddie, whose gaze was darting between
Aras and Shapakti as if trying to follow the conversation. "What's up?"
he asked. "Look, can I talk to this guy? Can someone interpret for me?"
Nevyan ignored the request. Eddie could do as he
wished; she didn't understand why he always asked permission. "Ual
seems to be delivering Neville and Rayat personally," she said. "Your
diplomatic mission was successful."
"I knew he'd keep his side of the bargain," said Eddie,
gaze still locked on Shapakti.
"There is no bargain," said Nevyan.
The ussissi pilot made a conspicuous point of
bringing his vessel to a halt a thousand kilometers outside wess'har
space. He eased himself out of his seat and peered over the back of it
at his passengers.
"This is as far as I go without explicit landing
clearance from F'nar."
Ual hadn't enjoyed his first experience of space flight
at all. Zero gravity was terrifying. Fragments of quills broken by his
free-fall collisions crisscrossed the grille across the air vent, and
he wondered how ussissi tolerated so much time between planets. Ralassi
was actually eating something, drifting a little against his
restraints, utterly unconcerned.
"Call F'nar again," said Ual. "Invite them to board to
carry out security checks."
The three human soldiers were actually dozing. Ual
found that degree of serenity extraordinary, but they behaved as if
this was as commonplace for them as it was for the ussissi. It probably
was. Mohan Rayat was reading from a small square object. Considering
his predicament, he didn't appear appropriately distressed either.
But Lindsay Neville was agitated. She fidgeted,
rearranging her collar. She had hardly spoken throughout the journey
and odd sounds were coming from her body, liquid gurgling sounds. Ual
turned and looked at her, alarmed that she might be about to spawn
young.
"That's my stomach," she said. "I haven't eaten in
twenty-four hours. Do wess'har feed prisoners?"
The ussissi didn't look up from the console. "They
don't take prisoners at all."
"I regret the discomfort," said Ual. "It makes little
difference in the end, though."
"You're a callous bastard, sir."
"You seem to forget that I might disapprove of your
action on Bezer'ej for reasons other than the diplomatic embarrassment
it causes us. Isenj don't engage in wanton destruction."
Ralassi held out his hand, offering whatever snack he
was devouring, but it seemed not to appeal to Lindsay despite her claim
of great hunger. She looked away and there was no sound except the
various hums and rattles of the hull and the ussissi pilot's
high-pitched conversation with F'nar.
His chatter stopped. He seemed surprised.
"This is not encouraging," said the pilot.
"Told you so," said Lindsay. "This is where they shoot
first and worry about hand-over negotiations later."
"F'nar isn't replying to my message," said the pilot. "This is the
commander of an Eqbas vessel standing off our stern. She
asks us to cut our drive and allow her vessel to take us inboard."
Ual had to think about that request for a few seconds
to make sense of it.
"What Eqbas vessel?"
"The one that has just made itself known to us."
Ual had known they were coming, but the reality of
arrival--and the speed--was a shock. "I had expected the wess'har to
board us."
"Unless I have misunderstood the ussissi on board, the
commander means to take this entire vessel
inboard."
Ual had planned to admit a boarding party as an act of
good faith. "Are you correct?"
"She said vessel." The
ussissi beckoned him forward. "Minister, look at this display. This is
a hazard system." He passed a hand across a smooth white surface and
shapes welled up from it, three-dimensional and subtly colored. "It
detects objects and hazards. The small object here
is us."
There was a bead-sized lump on the surface. Close to it
was a curved raised area that ran off the edge of the screen. Lindsay
edged up behind Ual to look.
"That is the Eqbas vessel,"
said the ussissi.
"Oh shit," said Lindsay.
Ual began to wonder if he had made a very grave error
of judgment. But perhaps it didn't matter which wess'har nation he met
first; one thing he did know about wess'har--from both his ancient
memory and his own experience--was that they meant what they said.
Humans didn't.
"Follow the Eqbas commander's instructions," said Ual.
Targassat taught
us that a minimal life-style is a prudent one, not only because it is
right but because it is pragmatic. If you require little, then hardship
will present no challenge to you; you will survive. The history of the
gethes confirms this. Without the trappings of civilization they
believe they must have, they degenerate into chaos. Their pursuit of
excess destroys them and their world. Unfortunately, Earth is not their
world alone.
SIYYAS BUR
matriarch historian of F'nar
She could see lights. She could see red
and green and gold and violet and something she didn't have a name for.
She didn't even have a name for herself or a sense of
her shape or substance. But she could see.
She could taste something familiar yet alien, earthy,
alive, and then it was gone again. She was moving fast through water.
Then she was on dry land, tight-packed with others she knew, enveloped
in familiar smells and dryness. And then she was looking down on black
grass.
It was all familiar and yet completely strange. She
wasn't afraid any more. She simply had a sense of urgency.
She had to do something.
The things she could see and feel and taste were inside, but
she couldn't define how: they just
were. There was nothing outside. She was
vaguely aware of the form of herself, but she couldn't feel anything
that told her where she ended and the rest of the universe began.
Then she could see, and she was aware that what she saw
was something outside; a brilliantly clear
night sky without horizon. Its clarity was impossible. For a few
moments--and she had no idea how long those were--she couldn't make
sense
of it.
When she did, she wished she hadn't.
It was indeed a sky; but it was an infinite field of
stars, and she was in it. She tried to
turn to look over her shoulder but she couldn't move. Animal panic
began to rise from the pit of her stomach and something said get a
grip and she tried to control her
breathing.
Then she realized something.
She wasn't breathing.
When Shan opened her eyes again, the star field
was gone.
She was clear who she was, and for some reason she was
very pleased about that. Warm, soft fabric touched her palms. Something
appetizingly spicy wafted on the air.
I'm Detective Superintendent
Shan Frankland, Environmental Hazard Division. For a moment she
wondered if she'd overslept and she tried to remember what shifts she
was working that week, and then she recalled that she hadn't worked
shifts since… since…
She tried to reach out for her swiss.
"She's not breathing. Fuck it, she's not
breathing."
Oh shit.
I'm not on Earth. I'm
twenty-five light-years away. I've got a parasite. I'm not--
There was something in her nose; no, it was in her
throat, and she tried to swallow. Whatever it was, it hurt like hell. A
tube? Sod that. She grabbed it
instinctively and pulled, feeling something rip from her face and
scrape the back of her throat. She gagged. Her stomach rebelled. She
rolled to the edge of the bed and vomited.
Someone took her shoulders. She tried to push them away
out of embarrassment but she couldn't. A voice was calling, "Get Aras!
Now!" and she still struggled to get that damn thing out of her mouth.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, steady."
A man held her down--yes, she could smell it was a male, it was all
flooding back--and the tube pulled clear of her throat with a painful
jerk. "There. All gone now. Take it easy."
She was staring down at her stomach contents. "I don't
remember eating that," she said, but her voice cracked. The face
looking down at her was one she knew. She just couldn't place it.
"Sorry… sorry…"
"Don't you worry about that, Boss. Do you know where
you are? Do you know me?"
She had to think about it. It took a while. He wiped
her face with a cold wet cloth.
"Ade?"
"Well done, Boss. Yes, It's Ade. How do you feel?"
I had a row with you. Her
skin burned. "Too hot."
"Let's clean you up."
It was more than a row.
She'd hit him, shot him, something like that. "Sorry… what's wrong with
me?" She couldn't understand why tears were streaming down his face.
Maybe she was coming round from a major anaesthetic, although she
couldn't imagine why. She knew she said stupid, embarrassing things
when she was regaining consciousness even though they sounded sensible
at the time. Shut up. "Can I have a cup of
tea? Sorry I threw up."
"You throw up just as much as you want. Hold still."
She felt the sudden chill as he took the cover off her and a lovely
iridescent white one went in its place. Dhren.
She recognized that. "Yeah, you bet you can have a cup of tea."
Then she managed to concentrate on her hands and
forearms. They didn't look like hers. They were just bone. "Oh God,
what's happened? What's--"
"It's okay… sshh … sshh…"
He put his hand on her shoulder and she
wanted to shake it off, but she couldn't. "You're home now."
"Jesus, look at the state of me." She struggled to put
her hand to her head. Where's my hair? She
could see her own outline under the dhren
but she was just peaks of bone, nothing at all. "How long have I been
out?"
"Don't you worry about that. You just rest."
A wonderful scent like sandalwood hit her, rich and
oily, and she knew instantly who had entered the room and what he meant
to her. The memory was vivid, clear, and shocking.
"Aras. Aras."
"Isan." There was that hint
of an alien double-tone resonance in his voice. She looked up into the
face of a creature that was almost human but still reminded her of a
heraldic beast. "Do you recognize me?"
"Course I do, you silly sod," she said. "Isn't some
bastard going to tell me what happened?"
"She's back all right," said a third male voice.
Eddie.
The gaps began filling in, first a couple of flash
frames and then a torrent of disjointed images: a shuttle cabin, farms,
a church window. She'd have to write them down. She'd have to get some
order restored. That was her job.
But few images kept returning. At first they were hazy.
But then she was absolutely certain about them, and she didn't like
them at all.
One was a painfully vivid memory of being slammed to
the cool gold ground of Constantine, meters underground yet bathed in
light, and being handcuffed. The other was of hearing a hatch close
behind her and seeing open, raw blackness speckled with impossibly
sharp stars filling her field of vision as the shuttle bay opened to
space and the escaping air tore past her.
I stepped out--
The pain of cold and vacuum was worse than she could
ever have imagined but she recalled it anyway, accurately enough to
make her gasp.
I'm dead oh God it hurts I can
still see oh God let me die let me die let me--
Aras Sar Iussan, the final thought in her mind as she
was dying, folded her in his arms and the comforting vibration rumbling
from his chest almost made the images fade.
"You're right," said Aras. "She's not breathing."
F'nar Plain, November 1,
2376.
The Eqbas ship was huge. Eddie didn't know much about
wess'har traffic control, but he could tell from the size and color of
the symbols on the projected screen that the target was a whopper. The
reactions of the wess'har around him confirmed it: they locked into
position and didn't even twitch, that freeze-and-wait reaction that was
typical when they were assessing a potential threat.
"When will we be able to see it?" said Eddie.
"Very soon," said Nevyan.
Nevyan's mother, Mestin, and the other senior
matriarchs of F'nar had gathered in the Exchange of Surplus Things to
watch the progress of the inbound vessel on the screens. Eddie had
always thought of them as unassailable military muscle but seeing them
transfixed by the arrival of the Eqbas worried him. He remembered
cowering beneath the shadow of huge wess'har ships as they swept over
Bezer'ej, feeling like a baffled caveman. And this vessel was a
magnitude greater than that.
The giant ship waited for clearance. Eddie had spent a
sobering hour looking through the images that Ual had given him,
pictures of the worlds where Eqbas Vorhi had intervened before; worlds
that were now orderly, and peaceful, and invaded.
The Eqbas could walk in whenever and wherever they wanted.
"Are you glad you're not running the show any more?" he
said.
Mestin blinked. "If you're asking if I have confidence
that Nevyan will handle this more effectively than I could, then yes.
She's far more dominant in a crisis. She has much more jask."
"Is it a crisis?"
"Wess'har are a cooperative species," she said. "But we
prefer this agrarian way of life, and it's evident they do not.
The adjustment may be disconcerting for
both."
Eddie wasn't sure if she was saying that the Eqbas
would have to get used to walking everywhere or that it was the end of
civilization as they knew it. He took out his bee cam and checked its
status. Giyadas watched his hands with the intensity of someone trying
to work out how a conjuring trick was done. It was one shot he couldn't
miss. He'd been denied two headlines of a lifetime--DISGRACED
HALF-ALIEN COP CHEATS CERTAIN DEATH, ALIEN
MINISTER KIDNAPS HUMAN WAR CRIMINALS--but he was buggered if he
was going to let this one pass by doing the decent thing.
Besides, Earth needed to know what was coming. It would
focus a few minds. He was clear about that now: he had done the right
thing--probably. Those riot scenes from Southern Africa wouldn't leave
his mind even when he tried to make them.
My fault. It's all my fault
again.
Nobody needed to walk far out onto the plain to see the
craft. Eddie heard it long before he saw it, a steady low-frequency
throbbing right on the threshold of his hearing that made the back of
his tongue itch. Then it dropped slowly through the cloud a good five
kilometers away, and it was colossal.
F'nar fell uncharacteristically silent.
"Holy shit," said Eddie. "And don't you dare repeat
that, Giyadas, you hear?"
Some shots didn't need commentary, and this was one of
them. The bronze ship hung in the sky and waited while the small party
of matriarchs approached. Then its airframe began to alter.
Eddie thought his eyesight was playing up; but the
outline wavered and the cylinder thinned at two points like a bubble of
hot blown glass being twisted by a craftsman, creating another bubble
on either flank. The belt of red and blue chevrons faded and then
reformed perfectly on each separate vessel.
Eddie was mesmerized. He'd seen ships and aircraft on
Earth that could separate into independent sections but the technology
was one of hydraulics and bulkheads: this sleight of engineering hand
appeared to be utterly fluid, even organic.
The bee cam recorded it faithfully. The Eqbas
cruiser--it helped Eddie to think of it in those terms--was now a large
ship with two escorts, two destroyers. The smaller sections drifted
away from the main section and rose out of sight through the clouds in
a tooth-shaking rumble. Where were they going? He'd ask.
"Well, this gets the top slot for the next bulletin,"
he said, as much for self-comfort as anything.
"Most impressive," said Nevyan. Giyadas clung to her
legs.
It was just a ship, a visiting ship. But it felt like
an invasion. If this was one routine vessel diverted simply because it
was closest to Wess'ej, he didn't want to think about what was waiting
on Eqbas.
The ship settled on the plain and the sound of its
drive dropped an octave as it powered down. The bee cam hovered,
motionless. Then a huge Eqbas stepped out of the airlock onto the ramp
and stood looking around before walking with an easy rolling gait
towards Nevyan.
It could only be a dominant matriarch. Her long
multi-jointed hands were clasped in a prayer-like grip as she walked
and a spectacular mane of tufted copper red hair extended in a line
down her forehead. Eddie was immediately put in mind of a muscular and
angry cockatoo. He didn't fancy asking her if she wanted a cracker.
"Esganikan Gai," said Nevyan.
"Big girl," said Eddie, awed. "Wow. Big
girl."
Esganikan, like all wess'har, didn't appear to know
much about personal space. She came close enough for him to smell her
slightly spicy breath and stared into his face, then looked to Nevyan
and trilled in a double-voice contralto. He could smell a pleasant
scent of fruit. Her ussissi aide, Aitassi, settled beside her.
"She greets you and says she has several more of these on
board," said Aitassi, indicating Eddie.
Nevyan trilled back and Esganikan cocked her head both
ways sharply. Eddie had never seen that before. He assumed Nevyan had
spoken eqbas'u and that her fluency had come as a surprise. Or maybe
she'd told Esganikan to watch her lip because she
was the boss woman round here; it was hard to tell with wess'har. But
at least neither of them had started throwing punches.
Esganikan turned towards the ship and more females
emerged, equally formidable, wearing ornately quilted knee-length
tunics in various shades of green and gray. There were males in the
crew, too. Eddie was struck by the fact that the gender split seemed
more equal. If there was one thing he had come to think of as normal on
Wess'ej, it was that there were many more males than females.
"Extraordinary," said Nevyan.
"I thought so too," said Eddie, and assumed they were
noticing the same thing.
"I thought you understood no eqbas'u."
"I don't."
"She said the detached craft had been sent to Bezer'ej
and Umeh."
"Blimey, they're not starting a war already, are they?"
"They'll carry out a reconnaissance of Umeh from orbit
and an environmental damage assessment on Bezer'ej. What did you
find extraordinary, then?"
"Lots of females," he said. "Didn't you?"
Nevyan made a head-rocking gesture like an Indian
dancer and didn't reply; Esganikan walked back to the ramp and waited,
warbling to someone inside the hatch.
Then Ual appeared on the brow and there was a
collective ssssss from the assembled
matriarchs of F'nar.
They froze. Then they tilted their heads, riveted. Ual
was the first isenj ever to set foot on Wess'ej, and Eddie let the bee
cam loose for posterity.
And right behind Ual was Lindsay Neville.
She trooped down the ramp with Rayat, herded by the
three marines, but Nevyan didn't react. Her eyes were on Ual. Out of
the context of his crowded but intensely orderly city, he looked
shockingly sinister.
But he's almost a friend. I like
him.
Eddie tried to steer Nevyan back to the subject of the
prisoners. "Beelzebub and his lovely assistant," he said helpfully,
nodding in their direction. Nevyan knew what a Royal Marine uniform
looked like so it should have been a simple process of elimination.
"What are you going to do with them for the time being?"
"Kill them," she said calmly. "What is Beelzebub?"
Oh boy. But this wasn't
Earth, and there were plenty of places back home where they would have
opted for summary execution with equal ease. It was none of his
business. "Just a name. Can I interview them first?"
"If you feel it might be useful."
Ual moved towards them with all the grace of a drinks
trolley with one broken wheel. Nevyan held out both arms and for one
awkward moment Eddie thought she might actually give this old enemy a
hug, but she was simply indicating that she was the one he had to talk
to. There was no reason for him to pick her out from a group of
apparently identical aliens.
"Thank you for not opening fire," he said, in perfect
but gasping English. "So this is where you choose to live, Mr.
Michallat. Matriarch Nevyan, you now have custody of the two humans."
Nevyan paused, perhaps baffled by the use of the
honorific matriarch. Wess'har weren't much
on protocol. "I hadn't expected you to bring the prisoners personally.
But if you think you will return with Aras Sar Iussan, we will never
hand him over."
"I realize that. The risk I've taken is not what will
happen to me here but what happens when I go home after defying my own
government."
"And empty-handed."
"That depends on what I came for."
"We don't bargain. You have nothing that we want."
"Ah, but you have something we
want."
Nevyan could do the silent routine as well as any
interviewer. She waited, gaze fixed. Eddie wondered at what point he
should do the diplomatic thing and break the impasse.
But Ual spoke at last. "I want a sustainable peace. I
want wess'har to come to Umeh to help us resolve our environmental
crisis."
Nevyan showed no shock or any emotion at all. Eddie, as
he always did at times of crisis, just let the bee cam keep rolling.
There was a loud thump of a body hitting
flagstones. It was hers. Shan was still having moments of not knowing
where she was in relation to her body.
"Sod it," she said. "Sod it, sod it, sod it."
She'd been so sure she could make it across the room to
the toilet. She tried to kneel and was surprised how suddenly easy it
was until she realized Aras had walked in and lifted her.
He scooped her up in his arms, laid her back on the bed
and wrapped her tightly in a blanket, hissing with annoyance.
"You're to call me when you want to get up," he said,
and put his hand on her chest. "You appear not to be breathing again."
No, she wasn't. C'naatat
had found some other mechanism in its box of tricks for oxygenating her
blood. She made a conscious effort to inhale and exhale, seeking the
primitive unthinking rhythm again. "I got out of the habit. No jokes
about breathing through my ears, okay? And I want to pee."
"I'll help you." He didn't seem to understand the joke. "You smell
extremely dominant, so you must be feeling better."
She sniffed the back of her hand. There was a scent of
mango with undertones of sawn wood. It was the wess'har pheromone that
signaled matriarchal aggression, jask,
powerful enough on occasions to make other females cede their authority
to her. She'd changed F'nar politics once before without realizing it.
This wasn't the time to be doing it again.
"I used to be able to control that," she said. "I
promise I won't depose any more isan've by
accident."
"You seem remarkably ebullient."
"I feel… okay."
Each time she shut her eyes and opened them again the
miracle of being alive and home was
fading. Aras's wonderful, mouth-filling sandalwood scent was the last
thing to pall. Hey, you're my old man. She
savored the elation of seeing again the one person who was in her
thoughts as she died, but the police officer within, the one she knew
had been there all her life, was telling her to calm down and get on
with the job.
Don't be such a fucking girl.
You didn't die. You're back. You're fine.
She wanted to surrender to tears and didn't know how. "I still need
the toilet."
"I'll help you."
"I can manage, thanks. I don't suppose lavatory
functions bother you, but they bother me." She paused at an
embarrassing thought. "Do they bother you?"
"If you're asking if we dealt with your bodily wastes
during your coma, we did not. You didn't excrete at all."
"It's your bedside manner I fell for," she said. "And
who's we?"
"Ade and myself."
Ade. Oh yes indeed, she
remembered Ade in detail now. She remembered, and she was waiting for
him to come back into the room. "Christ, were you selling bloody
tickets for the show?"
"Ade wanted to help. He's very distressed."
It was too late for that and it wasn't her condition
that was troubling her. It was the big gaps in her knowledge; she
didn't like gaps and she made a point of never having them. The absence
of knowledge was more than the irritating whisper of a Suppressed
Briefing. That, at least, let her know there really was some memory
drug-programmed into her subconscious even if she didn't know what it
was until some event triggered it. This was genuine oblivion.
The last thing she had done was to step out of the
shuttle's cargo bay, apparently months ago. Jesus
Christ, I really did it, didn't I? Now she was back on Wess'ej.
Apart from the brief moments of awful consciousness while she drifted
in the void, she didn't know what else had happened between the two
events.
But she remembered about Lindsay Neville detonating
nuclear devices on Ouzhari all right. Her recall of that was perfect.
"Where's Ade?"
"You said you wanted a cup of tea. He's gone to
Nevyan's home to get some from Eddie."
Ade was a good soldier and good soldiers followed
orders, including orders that said get these
bombs to Bezer'ej. She couldn't blame him for that. Lying on
the ground deep in Constantine, mind-numbing
pain in her legs and her guts, tape over her mouth, Ade threatening
Lindsay that he'd slot her if she didn't put the grenades down. Fuck
you, you shot Vijissi. Oh yes, she remembered it all right.
He'd stopped Lindsay killing her--really
killing her--with a grenade, so she owed him her life. It just didn't
feel that way. She remembered the impact of rounds sputtering into her
legs, her pelvis, knocking her down, punching through bone.
Later, girl. Take it easy. "Where's
Vijissi? Did they find him too?"
Aras shook his head.
"He wouldn't leave me. Mestin told him to stick with me
and he did, the poor little bastard."
Another friend gone, then, and she didn't have many. In
fact there was just Aras, because she hadn't yet come to terms with
Ade. Aras. She realized how precious he
was to her, and how the full sweet realization of that in her final
dying moment was being entombed forever behind her workaday
indifference. She didn't want to lose the feeling. She reached for it
desperately; it started to slip away. She panicked, clutching at it
like a key falling into deep water.
"I know I should say something really significant."
"Isan, I wish you would
rest."
"You were my final thought." It
was your last few seconds and you'd have given anything to tell him you
loved him. Now you can't even say the fucking word out loud. "I
didn't tell you how I felt."
It just never came out the way it should. Perhaps she
really didn't have any normal human feelings, just like Lindsay had
said. She wanted Aras's unerring gift for saying what he felt, and
being able to feel in the first place.
Aras did that canine head-tilt, and she knew exactly
which part of her was the hard-arsed copper who found his openness and
courage utterly disarming, and which was wess'har, altered by c'naatat
and bonded to him biologically through oursan.
"I was never offended," he said. "I know you're not a
demonstrative person."
"Do you want me to say it?"
"When you feel ready." He ran his palm over her scalp.
Her hand followed his: the stubble felt like someone had given her a
buzz cut. "Your c'naatat needs feeding.
See how fast it restores you."
"I'm starving. I could eat a scabby cat with piles."
"I recall that was your requested menu last time you
were injured," he said. He could approximate a human smile, but he
never showed his teeth. "I have more appetizing solid food."
"Bathroom," she said. She wanted to ask him why he
wasn't more excited to see her alive but perhaps it was the shock. You
couldn't just snap out of bereavement. She had to give him time. "C'naatat's
definitely working overtime."
She let him carry her to the toilet door and she shut
herself in, still draped in the blanket because she couldn't bear to
look at her own body. The toilet bowl was handsome aquamarine glass
shot with deliberate bubbles and flaws, a work of art that deserved
better appreciation than the steady assault of waste. Wess'har were
master glassmakers and a generous but anonymous individual had made the
bowl and cistern to a design provided by Constantine colony. Shan
pulled the flush. The water swirled.
Constantine was gone too.
She remembered preparing the colony for evacuation.
Three paces outside the toilet, her legs buckled again. Aras rushed to
pick her up but she waved him away, panting. She crawled on all fours,
frustrated to be helpless, but she felt… better, hungry and optimistic,
strength and energy building in her. Sweat stung her eyes: c'naatat
was burning her up, stoking her
metabolism and making up for lost time.
It didn't quite get her as far as the bed, though. She
got to her knees but it was one effort too many and Aras had to lift
her onto the mattress.
"I'm glad we don't have any mirrors," she said. She
could see the pity on his face and his un-wess'har reluctance to meet
her eyes. "I look like hell, don't I? Okay, don't answer that. Tell me
what I've missed."
"What do you remember?"
"Everything." C'naatat
didn't believe in the blissful erasure that normally went with serious
trauma. It spared her nothing. "Right up to the time I stepped out--"
She stopped. "I had Lindsay Neville. I
swear I put a round through the bitch but she was wearing a vest. She did
detonate the bombs, didn't she?"
"She did."
"And Bezer'ej? The colony? Why Eddie and Ade are here?"
"Perhaps you should wait until you're feeling stronger,
isan."
"Well, that's guaranteed to pique my curiosity. My
brain's strong enough, thanks. Tell me."
Aras made that long, slow hiss of annoyance. "The
devices were salted with cobalt."
Shan wasn't a scientist but she'd worked in EnHaz long
enough to have a good grasp of the league table of biohazards. "Shit."
"The area is heavily contaminated. We've yet to find
any bezeri who aren't dead or dying." Aras shut his eyes. "Nevyan
ordered the destruction of Actaeon. And
the World Before has now sent two vessels to our aid, with others to
follow."
Oh God. There was only so
much you could take in at one sitting. "Where's Lin now?"
Aras didn't answer. It wasn't a good sign. He still had
that blisteringly frank wess'har habit of saying the first thing that
came into his head so anything that interrupted the unedited flow had
to be serious. It meant he didn't want to upset her: it also meant he
knew she might do something extreme if she knew where Lindsay was, and that
told her either the bitch was accessible or
she had escaped.
But where the hell could anyone escape out here?
"I'll make your meal," he said, and left.
She fumed. A few minutes later Ade appeared with the
promised mug of tea. He spent an inordinate amount of time turning it
in his hands, looking like a man trying to find the right words.
"Come here," she said, trying very hard to choke down
anger that for once had no specific target. Ade edged towards her.
Something inside her was burning to be out, to get at him, to…
"Boss," he said. He was standing over her, turning the
mug in his hand. "Boss, I…"
Shan gathered what strength she had and brought her
right fist up hard, smashing the mug from his hands and sending it
shattering on the floor. He stepped back, mouth open in the formation
of some excuse that she didn't want to hear. She'd rarely lost control,
ever. Now she abandoned herself to rage.
"You bastard," she hissed. "You bastard,
you fucking well let her get me, you fucking well--" She slumped half
out of the bed, spent by the effort. Adrenaline consumed her. Then it
ebbed and faded, and she was left panting, hanging off the edge of the
mattress. Ade went to lift her. "Fuck off--fuck off out of my sight,
you
bastard--"
Aras slammed open the door and was between them in
three strides.
"Enough! Go, Ade. Leave her. And you, isan,
you will calm down, do you hear?"
Ade's face was stricken, devastated. He froze for a
moment and then strode out, crunching over broken glass.
Aras lifted her back onto the pillows and she accepted
his hand on her forehead. He slipped into a characteristic infra-sonic
rumbling, the kind wess'har fathers emitted to comfort a fretting
child, and shame washed over her along with the profound and
irresistible feeling of warm heaviness.
You lost it. Where's your
discipline? You never lost it out there.
Get a grip.
In an instant, she wanted both to beg Ade's forgiveness
and to kick the shit out of him for helping useless, make-believe
officer Lindsay fucking Neville transport bombs to Bezer'ej and force
her to space herself.
"I don't think I handled that well," she said at last.
Aras's comforting rumble trailed off into silence. "Did
you fire first, or did Ade?"
Perfect wess'har recall dredged up the exact sequence
of events on Constantine with an unflinching accuracy that her human
memory once struggled to achieve. She was looking down at Lindsay,
rifle to her forehead.
"Maybe Ade, maybe Mart." It was almost instantaneous:
she could feel the trigger yielding under her finger, the first round
hitting her in the pelvis, her rifle discharging into Lindsay's
ballistic vest. "But I was putting one through Lindsay."
Aras ahrugged. "What would you have done if you were
Ade, or Mart Barencoin?"
Shan felt a flutter of regret in her stomach. If either
of them were as hard-trained as she was, then she knew: she would
have fired. It was an unthinking
reflex.
"And I fired back." She reached out for Aras's hand. "I
just went on autopilot."
"Well, then," said Aras. He never implied rebukes--he
would chide her respectfully--but his reasonable tone was as good as
one. "And there's more you need to know."
"Is this going to piss me off even more?"
"Perhaps." He slid his arm round her shoulders and
leaned his forehead against hers. "I hardly know how to tell you."
"Try me. You know you can tell me anything."
He took his time. She waited.
"I killed Josh."
She almost asked him how it felt to kill a former
friend. Then she realized she knew already, even if Lindsay had
survived the attempt.
It was all too bloody easy.
"Well, serves the bastard right." Josh had taken
Lindsay and Rayat to Christopher Island--Ouzhari--knowing
they planned to deploy ERDs. He had his own pious logic. She hoped he
had his excuses ready for his god. "But I'm bloody sorry for you,
sweetheart."
Aras straightened up. "There are other matters, too."
"Are we getting near the end of the list or what?"
"Perhaps I should let Ade explain. He insisted that he
should. Will you promise to hear him out this time?"
"Okay."
Shan had been pretty sure she knew Ade. Reliable,
decent, sensible: a solid sergeant, the sort that every army--and
police
force--was built upon. He did his duty, even when politicians wanted
him
to do stupid, dangerous things, and even when it meant shooting her.
She had come perilously close to sleeping with him but--as
always--discipline and the prospect of his bioscreen broadcasting the
event to the rest of the marines stopped her.
Bioscreen.
She hadn't noticed the green light in his palm this
time. Maybe he'd deactivated it. "So he knew about the bombs."
"None of them knew about the cobalt except Rayat. No,
Ade now finds himself in a very difficult position."
"He deserted?" No insignia.
She could still take in every detail without thinking. Hey, I'm
back. "Is that why he removed his
stripes?"
"He surrendered," said
Aras. "He had no choice. You… you infected him, isan.
You injured him. Do you remember?"
Crack. Her head smashed
into the bridge ofAde's nose as he tried to pin her down. She
remembered that. But Lindsay had checked her out. She hadn't found a
break in her skin. Useless cow.
"Don't be hard on him," said Aras. "He fed you when
Nevyan brought you back. He read to you. He is utterly devoted to your
welfare, whatever has happened."
Shan shut her eyes.
"Shit," she said. "Oh shit."
The Respected
Minister has exceeded his authority. We now have no collateral with
which to bargain for the return of Aras Sar Iussan. There are those who
say we invest too much concern in ancient war crimes when there are
more immediate crises, but there is also the matter of national honor,
and having thrown that away, Minister Ual should answer for it.
MINISTER
PAR SHOMEN
EIT,
speaking at an emergency session of the Northern Assembly
"That," said Rayat, "is exquisite."
Lindsay saw the wall of shimmering white pearl as they
passed the edge of the inland cliff. She wasn't sure what she was
looking at and then her perspective kicked in and resolved it into the
concave bowl of a vast amphitheater.
F'nar looked even more shockingly unreal than it did in
Eddie's reports. It seemed more bizarre, more organic, as if aliens had
found a book on Antonio Gaudi's architecture and had a stab at making
it their own vernacular style. It was almost captivating enough to
divert her from the realization that she had an unspecified but very
short time left to live.
"Yeah, lovely," she muttered, and followed Mart
Barencoin's broad back. He still had that habit of looking around and
then walking backwards for a few paces as if he was still on patrol.
"Where are we going? I didn't think they had prisons or police stations
here."
"We do not, Lindsay Neville," said a ussissi voice. "You will go to
the Exchange of Surplus Things, unless a clan is
willing to accommodate you. But that depends when they execute you. An
overnight stay might not be necessary."
She glanced down. She had difficulty telling ussissi
apart, distinguishing them only by their taste in bandoleer-type belts
of bright fabric or beaded embroidery.
"Are you Ralassi?" she asked.
"Idiot," said the ussissi. "I'm Serrimissani. I'm a
female. Ralassi is male. No wonder your species is doomed."
"It's a pleasure to meet you, too."
"I once worked with Ual. I now work with Nevyan."
Lindsay noted she used the word with,
not for. "I thought we'd be dead as soon
as we stepped off the ship."
"That would be normal procedure. But there is
information required first."
"About what?"
"Culpability. Technology. Whatever the Eqbas require."
Serrimissani certainly spoke excellent English. That
didn't comfort Lindsay one bit. She kept her head up as she walked, but
this didn't feel like being a prisoner of war. She now had no sense of
being on the right side and just unfortunate to be captured: she felt
like a criminal. She had always wondered why captives didn't try to
escape, why those herded into prison camps never rose and overthrew
their guards, and now she knew. Docility in the face of threatening
authority was an automatic response. There were very few Shan
Franklands in the human species.
But Lindsay knew she was responsible for something
terrible, and the wess'har were right. She had to take the blame.
The wess'har she passed simply glanced at her. There
were no stones thrown or abuse hurled.
"They're very restrained," said Rayat.
"Shan always said chilled or
punching. This is chilled." Barencoin glanced over his shoulder
at her as if to shut her up. "I think we all know what punching is
going to be like."
"And yet you're not on their wanted list, Mr.
Barencoin," said Rayat.
Barencoin walked on, oblivious. Jon Becken, right
behind them, responded for him. "Yeah, it's our boyish good looks and
smart uniforms. Everyone loves a Royal Marine."
"We had friends in high places," said Webster.
At the Exchange of Surplus Things--a big hall with
doorless side rooms and absolutely no trappings of grandeur--Ual and
Eddie stood talking like old chums while Nevyan and Esganikan watched
them with that odd display of head tilting. Wess'har wandered in and
out with crates and mesh bags of unrecognizable produce, pausing to
stare at the activity in the main hall, but it seemed more curiosity
than anger. The place smelled of soil and sandalwood and indefinable
vegetable scents. Lindsay felt that she was standing trial in a
supermarket.
Serrimissani broke from the discussion and scuttled
towards Lindsay, but she slid in between her and Rayat, cutting out the
scientist like a sheepdog. "Do you have virin've?
Communications devices? If so, we require them."
"Yes." Rayat hesitated but Lindsay held out hers. There
was no harm they could do with them. "There you go."
"What do you want it for?" said Rayat.
"To determine culpability," said Serrimissani.
Rayat stared down at Serrimissani and she drew back her
lips ever so slightly, just enough to reveal a mouthful of close-packed
little teeth. He fumbled in his jacket and pulled out his handheld. She
took it and he flinched when her paw brushed his hand.
Rayat looked at Lindsay and shrugged. "A show trial,
perhaps?"
"Not their style. And they're not taking them because
they think we're going to call in air support."
Serrimissani and Aitassi were conferring, brandishing
the two handhelds while Eddie watched the exchange with a slight frown
of concentration. He didn't look her way, perhaps deliberately.
Esganikan Gai drew herself up and covered the ten meters to where
Lindsay and Rayat were sitting in a few strides. There was something
about her manner that reminded Lindsay of Shan, and that wasn't
reassuring.
She stared into Lindsay's face and then into Rayat's,
head tilting, pupils flaring and closing, and trilled. Serrimissani
trotted up beside her.
"She says she needs to understand who is to blame for
the events on Bezer'ej so that appropriate action may be taken--no
more,
no less."
Lindsay really didn't like wess'har eyes. It was the
way the four pupils constricted to a hairline cross: it made them look
like the blind voids of a statue's eyes, soulless and unfathomable. Her
interrogation resistance training enabled her to simply look through
the Eqbas, but it wasn't easy.
"That's simple enough," said Lindsay. There was nothing
else left to say. "It was me and him."
Esganikan warbled. Serrimissani appeared to be
struggling with the translation and summoned Aitassi. Eventually an
English version was extracted.
"She says that fact is not at issue," said
Serrimissani. "You did not bring weapons of this kind with you in Thetis.
So another generation was complicit. The
Eqbas need to know who authorized or ordered you to take these actions,
and then who took steps to right these wrongs, or did not, because they
must be held accountable when we reach Earth."
Reach Earth.
"But half the people you want to punish could be dead
and gone in twenty-five years' time," said Lindsay, hearing the words reach
Earth and desperate to shut out their true
meaning.
"Thirty years," said Serrimissani. "And what your
people do between now and then will be added to the reckoning."
Ade stood at the door, a new mug in his hand.
Shan swallowed her embarrassment and steeled herself
for an apology. Being wrong was easy, and so was admitting error. But
real regret--regret at lashing out at someone prepared to give their
life for you--was hard. She was sorry for very few things in her life,
but every one of them ate away at her.
Something in the back of her mind said she had done
something particularly unforgivable to Ade.
"So, you got me killed, and I gave you a dose," she
said, saving him the trouble of finding the first words. "I think we're
even." No, that wasn't good enough. "Okay. I started the shooting.
Sorry."
He looked up without raising his chin. After
twenty-five years of nicking guilty bastards she was utterly immune to
appealing contrition, even in a man she fancied, but he wasn't putting
it on.
"No, I'm sorry, Boss. If
you think you can hate me any more than I hate myself, you're wrong."
"If I hadn't been about to blow Lin's brains out, would
you have fired?"
Ade chewed his lip. "I don't know."
"Well, you stopped her turning me into hamburger. Even c'naatat
couldn't have put me back together
again after that." He was a good meter from her and clearly still too
scared to hand her the mug. Her voice sounded like an old woman's,
hoarse and cracking. "Shit, Ade, I'm sorry. I should never have said
those things to you."
"It's okay, Boss. I know you've been through hell." Hell.
She thought again about the moment the shuttle's bay
opened to space and she pushed herself off the edge of the coaming into
the most profound emptiness a human could conceive. The first minute of
dying had been hell, yes. They said you
could last maybe twelve seconds in space. But that was for regular
humans.
The brief episodes of consciousness that followed, with
no sense of duration or frequency, were far worse. She couldn't feel a
thing: she was isolated in her own head, a place she had never much
liked being. The blind, all-consuming panic when she opened her eyes
and realized where she was had been worse than the pain. She fought it.
Do your worst. You think you can
break me? I can handle this. I can do anything. Fuck you, I'm
going to stay sane because there's
nothing more you can do to me.
She remembered thinking that like a mantra; fuck
you, fuck you, fuck you. She realized she'd
been railing against God just in case she'd been wrong, and there
really was a deity out there somewhere to hear her contempt and
defiance. But there wasn't. There was just her, a scrap of dried meat
fueled by anger, and she'd still held on to her sense of self. And she
had come back. Nothing, absolutely nothing could ever
touch her inner core now.
"Want to talk?" asked Ade. "I mean, it--"
"Maybe later," she said. The detail could wait. "Not
yet."
"Okay."
"Is it true you looked after me? Read to me?"
Ade nodded. "Too little too late, eh?"
"I've had my tantrum. The slate's clear."
"Stop trying to spare my feelings."
"I can't be arsed to spare anyone's feelings, Ade." Spare mine.
Stop being kind. Get angry, for Chrissakes.
"Do I get that tea or what?"
"I was so sure I knew what I was going to say to you."
Ade's face fell a little more. He didn't look any
different: no claws, bioluminescence or any of the visible retro-fit
improvements that her own c'naatat colony
had added. She'd been devastated when she found out that Aras had
deliberately infected her. The fact that he'd done it to save her life
was lost in the brief, raging, utterly desolate realization that she
would never be able to leave.
"Ade, do you realize what I've given you? Look at me,
Ade. You can't go home. Ever. You can't
have kids. You can't even sleep with a woman again. Do you understand
what all that means?"
His lips moved and she wasn't sure if he was forming a
reply or trembling. "I know. But I'm alive, and the bezeri aren't."
There was a long pause. "So, serves me right, eh?"
"Did you object to your orders?"
"Not enough."
"Well, you probably did all you could." Shan looked
longingly at the mug of tea beyond her reach. She would have told Lin
to stuff her orders, but then she had never been a soldier. Police had
their own way of ignoring instructions they didn't fancy obeying. She
had never been in Ade's position so she had no right to judge. And
I can't expect everyone to be me. "If an
officer and a spook order you, I don't think you have a lot of choice."
"No, everyone has a
choice."
"And having a choice, you must
make it."
"Sorry?"
"Targassat. Those who can act, must." She held out her
hand to him. She knew what it was to be a leper. "You did choose,
actually. You stopped her fragging me." Perhaps the next question was
one too many. "What did you feel when you shot me?"
Ade took her hand reluctantly. It must have felt
repellent, skeletal, but he closed one hand around it and then the
other. "Nothing. The second the firing stared I went on auto. Just
reflex. I'm sorry."
"It's what we all do. Or we end up dead."
"I don't even know how to say this. I'm not Eddie."
"What?"
"When you--when you just stepped out." His eyes filled
with tears: she was shocked by his emotion. Adoration shone out of him.
"You're the…you're… sod it, Boss, you're a fucking hero. A real fucking
hero."
"Bollocks." She couldn't meet his eyes any longer. "Can
I have that bloody tea now?"
She couldn't quite manage the weight of the mug, not
even with both hands. He held it while she drank. She was so desperate
for the comforting taste that she didn't mind the humiliation of being
fed like a child. It was bliss.
"They're here, you know," said Ade.
"Who? The World Before?"
"Yeah. EqbasVorhi." He wiped her chin. She didn't
protest. "Their second ship's just shown up. They don't look like the
local wess'har and they don't speak wess'u. And they--well, Nevyan can
tell you. She's with them now." Ade shut down. His gaze dropped and he
lowered both his chin and his voice.
"And what? Come on, Ade, what?"
Aras strode back in to the room, emitting the acidic
scent of agitation. He loomed over Ade. "You eat first, isan,"
he said, and put a bowl down a little too
hard on the nearby table. It steamed alluringly, wafting that spicy
scent she'd noticed earlier. "And when you're able to walk unaided, you
can involve yourself in public life again. Until then, you stay put and
eat."
Nobody gave Shan orders. Her normal reaction would have
been to walk out and investigate for herself. But she peered under the
covers and she could see her ribs, and not just the lower ones like any
fit individual might. It was the whole rib cage, top to bottom, with no
visible sign of abdominal muscle or pectorals or breasts. It looked as
if some zealous medical student had removed every scrap of fat and
muscle from a cadaver and then replaced the skin as an afterthought,
just to keep everything tidy. She couldn't begin to imagine what her
face looked like. At least she hadn't had any looks to lose.
"Okay," she said, swallowing hard. For all the feeling
of renewed confidence, a voice inside her reminded her she wasn't that
far the other side of dead. Get a grip, girl.
You've come through a lot worse than looking like shit. "Here's
the deal. I eat, and you find me someone to teach me eqbas'u."
"I'll do it," said Ade. "No problem, Boss."
Poor sod. Her anger had
burned out. They were three freaks of nature; they had to stick
together.
A vague memory of needing to run and hide--not
hers--intruded and dissolved again. She settled back on the pillow and
decided to pursue it after Aras had finished feeding her.
She didn't enjoy being helpless. Not at all.
Language was frustrating Nevyan. Esganikan was
learning wess'u rapidly but Ual was happier with English; ironically,
it was the one tongue that appeared to unite them. Mart Barencoin was a
welcome oasis of familiar language even if it was an alien one.
He took a few cautious steps towards her in the
Exchange of Surplus Things, his two comrades watching him carefully.
"What are you planning to do with us, ma'am?" He was a
little taller than she was, and fascinatingly dark: she remained
intrigued by the exotic variety of color in human hair and eyes. "We
can make ourselves useful."
Nevyan wasn't sure if she should mention Shan to him. "Do you really
want to go to Mar'an'cas? It's not very hospitable."
Barencoin shrugged. "Chaz and Izzy could do with some
help."
"You have no need to punish yourselves just because I
won't do it for you."
"I do feel responsible, actually. In human law, I would
be."
"It was Neville, Rayat and the two colonists who took
them to Ouzhari who set and detonated the devices. They had the choice
not to use them; you transported the devices, which was foolish, but no
more foolish than carrying a tilgir and
then not using it to kill someone." She
paused to see if there was any comprehension on his face. "Aras has
already executed Joshua Garrod. We will locate his companion in due
course."
Barencoin reacted visibly to the mention of Garrod with
a small jerk of the head; he smelled agitated. Nevyan was never sure
whether to check what humans didn't know, another problem in dealing
with a species that had such a bizarre and proprietorial attitude to
information. They told each other some things and not others. She knew
now why they needed people like Eddie Michallat.
"What did Josh do that I didn't?"
"He helped Neville set the bombs and activate them."
"I transported them. Ade and--"
"Can you not see the line?"
Barencoin's bewilderment made him look much more like a
human child. "I don't think I'm going to get the hang of this
culpability thing, ma'am." He kept glancing at that light grown into
his palm, his bioscreen. All the marines had one: so did Lindsay
Neville. Nevyan understood why Shan found the device repellent. "Can we
visit Mar'an'cas and assess the situation? And can we see Sergeant
Bennett?"
So they still clung to their old identities even after
their government had discharged them. Nevyan found that sad. They had
no other community, not even in the displaced Constantine colony.
"Later."
"Just tell me if he's okay. I know there's something
wrong."
"He's well." Secrecy was very hard work. She didn't
like it at all. "He's had unexpected news, as have we all. When he's
ready, you can see him."
Barencoin made that shoulder-hunching gesture and
raised his eyebrows, indicating he didn't understand, and she fought a
natural urge to explain to him as she would to Giyadas. "We'll wait,"
he said, as if he had another option.
The Exchange of Surplus Things was becoming what Eddie
called a circus. He'd explained what that
was and she couldn't see the comparison at all. Shapakti and his crew
were moving equipment and Esganikan was taking great interest in Ual
while Eddie hovered at his side. Fersanye had volunteered to keep Rayat
and Lindsay under control in her home because her clan was accustomed
to aliens, having provided brief lodging for Shan Frankland. And many
wess'har were simply turning up to deposit and collect produce, stare
at the extraordinary tableau, and wander off about their business.
Nevyan wanted quiet order again. This was all her
doing. You invited them. It was an
uncomfortable time, but something had changed: Shan was back. She felt
her confidence growing. She wasn't alone out in front any longer.
"Hey, Ade!" said Barencoin suddenly. "Where you been,
you daft bugger?"
Ade Bennett had come into the hall as if looking for
someone. The other marines moved towards him and he came to a halt,
smiling, but folded his arms awkwardly and tightly across his chest in
that characteristic keep-your-distance gesture she'd seen Shan use so
often. Wess'har parted conspicuously to let him pass and Barencoin
glanced at them.
"Waiting for you tossers to show up," said Ade, clearly
with affection.
"You look bloody well. They treating you okay?"
"Like royalty."
"We brought some guests."
"Yeah. I know."
"What's wrong? I thought you wanted to kick seven
shades of shit out of them."
"I'm a bit busy."
"Why didn't you go to Mar'an'cas?"
"I did."
"And?"
"I came back, all right?" There was that slight edge to
his tone that said he was the dominant male. Nevyan watched, waiting
for the fight. "Look, I have to sort something right now. See Eddie.
He'll get you something to eat." Ade turned to Nevyan. "Is that okay,
ma'am? Can they go to your place?"
Nevyan felt she was collecting stray humans. It would
amuse Giyadas, though. Her adopted sons didn't share the isan'ket's
fascination with the gethes language, but they would watch them
for
amusement anyway. "I'm sure Eddie is happy to share his food."
But Barencoin didn't appear interested in a meal. He
exhibited rare tenacity. He had spotted something. "Ade, there's
something well weird going on. What's up?"
"Later," said Ade. "And I fucking mean it, okay? Later."
Then Barencoin reached out towards Ade's shoulder.
Nevyan expected it to be an aggressive gesture and prepared to
intervene, but Ade took a step back.
"I thought as much," said Barencoin, suddenly
red-faced. "Oh shit, Ade. You've got it, haven't you?"
"It's not a dose of clap. And for Chrissakes keep your
voice down."
"Shit." Barencoin backed off and turned to his two
comrades, evidently appalled. He was still glancing back at Ade and
muttering shit while he herded them
towards Eddie.
"They can keep their mouths shut," Ade reassured
Nevyan. "God knows how he'll react when he finds Shan's alive."
"It makes no difference now. C'naatat
is beyond human reach again."
Ade jerked his thumb in the direction of Shapakti. "Now
his boss-woman's here, can she spare him to do Shan a favor?"
"Is that wise?"
"Shan wants to learn the language. She speaks wess'u
and so does he. He can teach her."
"I'll ask Esganikan."
"How much does she know about Shan?"
"She knows as much as I do. We don't conceal matters
from each other. It's a most corrosive habit and I would like to get
out of it soon."
Ade shrugged. "Okay. Shan doesn't know Lin and Rayat
are here, by the way. Aras thought she'd go off on one if we told her."
"Is she well enough to talk to me?" Shan would
understand that Nevyan had duties to carry out before she could visit a
friend. Aras needed time with her first. It occurred to Nevyan that Ade
might need that too, but that was a matter for the three of them to
resolve. "I should be with her, at least for a little while."
"She's eating everything that doesn't move and swearing
like a trooper, so apart from the fact she looks like a corpse, she's
getting back to normal."
"A harsh assessment."
"What did you expect me to do, cry my eyes out at the
state of her?" Ade fumbled with his beret and shoved it into his
pocket. "Done that. She doesn't need reminding what a state she's in."
"Do you want to talk to Commander Neville?"
"I've got nothing to say to her."
"Will you help us to examine the material on her
communication device and Rayat's?"
Ade glanced down at his boots. They were exceptionally
shiny. "What are we looking for?"
"We want to know who authorized the use of nuclear
devices."
"The FEU."
"Personally. Organizations aren't responsible. People
are." Nevyan beckoned Aitassi: the aide would trust him to extract
information. "And even if they're no longer alive when we reach Earth,
those who later contribute to their guilt will be."
Nevyan saw that same reversion to a child's face: Ade
Bennett understood responsibility no better than Barencoin did,
although both of them clearly wanted to. She wondered how any gethes
would ever learn.
If they didn't learn, the Eqbas would teach them the
hard way.
Ade skipped his daily run for the first time in
more than twenty years, barring days when he'd actually been in combat.
He'd do an extra few kilometers tomorrow. Once you let things slip, you
lost all discipline.
But Shan's alive.
The thought kept rolling over him anew as if he'd
forgotten--as if he could. He had a second chance. You didn't get those
often and you didn't waste them. He jogged back home along the
terraces, occasionally feeling for the two handhelds in his top pocket,
and realized that he didn't actually have a clue what he was going to
do with that unimaginable opportunity.
He leaned on the pearl-encrusted door and it swung
open. The smell of hot oil and caramelizing sugars filled the living
room and the table was covered in plates and bowls. Aras, holding a
sizzling pan in one hand, gave Ade an exasperated look and motioned him
to the table.
"Hey, I just saw Mart and Sue and--" Ade paused. Shan
was up. She was really up, in every sense.
She was standing in front of the screen that occupied a large section
of one wall, a walking corpse in her formal black uniform pants and a
white sports vest. Neither fitted her any longer. She looked freshly
horrific.
"Shit," she said. "What the fuck's happening back
there?" Something on the BBChan news feed was annoying her. Then she
stopped and glanced over her shoulder. "Hi, Ade. Find me anyone?"
"Nevyan's going to ask Esganikan."
"And she is?" Shan set an unsteady but determined
course for the table and half fell onto the bench beside it. She
reached for a pile of netun jay and
munched contentedly.
"She's the commander of the second Eqbas mission."
"Yeah, I'm going to want to talk to her."
How long had he been away? A matter of hours.
Shan's arms had some suggestion of sinews
and he could no longer see bone across the full width of her chest. Her
black hair was almost a respectable crew cut, slightly fluffy and thick
enough to make her look more like a woman again. And she was, as far as
she was concerned, back in charge of the operation. It was written all
over her, from the set of her shoulders to that way she had of
clenching her jaw.
"I'm waiting," she said. She was eating like a horse; netun,
those nice little chewy flat-breads Aras
called gurut, a bowl of an bright orange evem soup, and
a large jug of tea. "I can't just
sit here on my arse all day."
"You can." Ade decided to distract her from expeditions
and laid the handhelds on the table. She was a copper. She'd done more
investigations than he'd had hot dinners. She knew her way around
records and files. "Take a look at this."
She picked up the handhelds and turned them over. "That
reminds me," she said. "Can I have my sidearm and my swiss back,
please?"
Aras smelled annoyed, a scent almost like grapefruit
oil. Ade was finding that kind of cue easier to pick up now.
"Yes, isan. But
you have no need to go out and use them, have you?"
"I'll sit and eat until I'm fit to go out. That was the
deal."
She examined Rayat's device with one hand, taking a
bite out of a netun and wiping a stray
bead of bright gold filling off her chin with a careful finger. The
handheld clicked into life and she studied the image. Ade liked to
watch her think. It was exciting to imagine what process was going on
in that agile, ferocious mind, as long as he wasn't on the receiving
end of it.
"Nevyan needs information from that," he said.
"I really ought to do a verified copy of the data
before I go crashing around. You know me, stick to rules of evidence."
Her eyes were fixed on the device, appraising and unemotional. Then she
almost smiled. "What do you want to find?"
Aras slammed the pan down on the range and leaned
across the table, hands flat on it. "Enough," he hissed. "She isn't
well enough for this."
"Sweetheart, I'm a big girl and I'll decide what I need
to know." She put her hand on his. "This is what I do. I'm a copper."
She paused as if something funny had occurred to her. "Do you know, I
never put my papers in? I never actually resigned. Is Wessex Regional
Constabulary still there any more? Did anyone tell them I was dead so
they could release my pension?"
"I can find out for you," said Ade. He never worried
about his pension. "Here, have some tea."
"This means you've had contact with Rayat."
"Leave him to Nevyan," said Aras.
"He's alive and here, then?"
"I--"
"Aras, I've managed to keep my head for two months in
space without a fucking suit." Her tone was calm and she squeezed his
hand, but it was tinted with warning. Ade could see her knuckles
whiten. "I'm capable of hearing a sitrep from Ade without going
ballistic. Go on, Ade. Brief me."
Ade felt he was pushing Aras's self-control to the
limit. Wess'har didn't seem to have much, not as far as anger was
concerned. He glanced at Aras's grim expression, and then at Shan: and
Shan was the Boss. He deferred.
"Ual brought Rayat and Lindsay here. Mart, Sue and Jon
arrested them."
"Result." She gave him an approving thumbs-up,
apparently unconcerned. "Nice job."
"Actually, they turned up in the second Eqbas ship. The
commander is a big scary bird called Esganikan Gai."
"But you're not afraid of big scary birds, are you?"
"Nah." He grinned, feeling a little precious warmth
from her. "Not usually."
She winked. "Good."
"And they've sent teams to recce Umeh and Bezer'ej from
orbit."
Shan thumbed the controls of the handheld. "What am I
looking for in here?"
"Culpability. That's what Serrimissani called it."
"Explicit orders to deploy ERDs."
"Yeah."
"Personal, not collective, right?"
"Names."
Shan reached for another gurut
and chewed carefully while she browsed through files. If she hadn't
looked so skeletal and swamped by her uniform, she could easily have
passed for her old self, in control, analytical, and not about to take
any shit: a senior detective going about her business. He wondered if
she was going to collapse when his back was turned.
"Get me my swiss, will you, sweetheart?" she said, eyes
not moving from the handheld. Ade went to the cupboard and reached for
it at the same time Aras did. They stared at each other for a second
too long and Ade felt his face redden.
Silly sod. She didn't mean you.
Aras took the swiss and handed it to Ade with an
expression and scent that he simply couldn't read at all. If Shan had
seen the reaction, she showed no sign of it. But she never missed a
trick and Ade felt inexplicably humiliated.
Ade surrendered the swiss. "Thanks," she said. No, she
was completely deadpan. He couldn't even smell a reaction, and he was
sure he could do that by now. "Now, this is what you do. You shove this
in here. A little upgrade I borrowed when
I was in Special Branch."
Both the swiss and Rayat's handheld made a satisfying
simultaneous chunk sound and Shan smiled,
not at him or Aras but to herself.
"I'd have thought a spook's kit would have been harder
to crack," said Ade.
"Yeah, they often think that too," said Shan. "It pays
to play Mr. Plod. Anyway, Rayat wouldn't want to draw attention to
himself if anyone from the Thetis payload
picked this up. But all I've done is get in. Rayat's too professional
to have obviously encrypted stuff. Anyway, what are we looking for?
Some dialogue that shows he was given explicit instructions to use
Beano bombs? Okay, tell me what you know about the sequence of events
that led up to deployment."
Ade wasn't sure where to start. "When we started
planning to use the Once-Only suits?"
"When Rayat got involved."
Ade shut his eyes and imagined himself back on board Actaeon
again. Think. In
Actaeon's armory, Neville and me and Rayat looking
at the racks. "He was using his handheld as if he was messaging
someone, and then he wanted to know if we could get ERDs down to the
surface in the Once-Only suits. I said yes because they were about
thirty kilos each, and I said it was a bad idea. Then Commander Neville
said he couldn't deploy ERDs and they had an argument about Beano bombs
too. She was adamant they weren't going to use any, and Rayat wasn't
going to discuss it in front of me so I asked her if she wanted me to
leave and she said yes."
"Well, she's as good as dead anyway so her motive
doesn't matter now." Shan scrolled and tapped, eyes moving between her
swiss and the handheld. "He couldn't encrypt on the ITX so if he was
phoning home, it was either plain language or code. Let's have a look
at his message log."
"He won't have one. He'll have done a fast shred."
Shan turned the handheld so that Ade could see it. It
was just a screen of numbers and symbols. "Outgoing message paths. He
hasn't bothered to erase them. And he's not that careless." She chewed
her lip thoughtfully. Aras hovered again, taking her left hand and
folding her fingers around a mug as a silent order to drink its
contents. "He hasn't sent that many in the past six months, which isn't
surprising really. Let's have a look at the address book."
"Not even Lindsay would be thick enough to file a
number labeled SPOOK HQ."
"They're going to show up on Earth with a warrant,
aren't they?"
"Who?"
"Esganikan and company. They'd better hope the suspects
are going to be around in twenty-five years' time. Or maybe they're
just looking for an excuse for a punch-up."
"That's not very wess'har."
"No. But they must have thought about the time
differential."
"Surely."
"Yeah, surely." The idea was bothering her, he could
see that, a puzzle she couldn't crack. "But if the alternative is to
say the guilty parties might be dead when you turn up, then you might
as well write off the whole crime. And wess'har don't seem to believe
in a statute of limitations or spent convictions."
"They said something about those
who later contribute to their guilt."
Shan appeared to consider that and then flicked through
files. Ade moved to look over her shoulder. She shifted a little,
evidently uncomfortable, and then tugged at his pants leg.
"Sit down."
"Sorry."
"Is there any slang term for Beano bombs?"
"That is the slang.
Biological neutralization ordnance."
"Any other names?"
"Oh… bleach. Floor cleaners."
Aras sat down at the table opposite Shan and tucked
into the pile of gurut, making a faint
riffling sound like someone flicking through a wad of paper. Ade had
never heard it before.
"What are you so pleased about?" asked Shan.
The urrrring sound
stopped. "You're home, isan."
"Yeah, I'm glad to be back, too," she said. "I really
am."
It was a brief moment and one that didn't include Ade.
He'd have to get used to that. Shan laid aside the handheld for a
moment and wolfed down more netun.
"Is it me, or is it hot in here?"
"It's you," said Aras.
"Okay, cool-down time," she said, and made an unsteady
path for the back terrace, the rear one that overlooked the plain. Aras
had excavated his home at the furthest edge of the caldera. He must
have had a hard time coming to terms with being c'naatat
in a city where everyone was part of a family.
There was an uneasy silence. Aras opened the large
container he had built for Black and White and placed food in their
green glass bowl. Ade wandered across and stood watching, trying to
find the right moment to talk.
Two noses poked out of the nest ball of shredded
fabric, then the rats waddled out and snatched chunks of capsicum and
soybeans. They rushed into separate corners to devour them.
"You're going to thump me, aren't you?" said Ade.
Aras began urrrring again.
He could still talk while he was doing it. Ade was fascinated and
realized how dully human he must have seemed to Shan by comparison.
"No. I would prefer that she rests and eats, but she's
Shan, so she'll do as she pleases."
"I think Lin and Rayat will occupy her."
"She seemed quite calm about their presence. Please
help me keep her that way."
"Anything else you want to say to me?" Back
off, get out, leave my missus alone. "If
so, now's the time."
Aras picked up a gurut and
chewed thoughtfully. "Yes. It's your turn to clean the floors."
If he had wanted to tell him to sod off he'd have done
it, Ade reasoned. He went to look at Rayat's handheld, coupled to
Shan's machine by a fiber, and realized she had taken her swiss out to
the terrace with her.
He stood at the door. Shan was leaning on the stone
balustrade, head bent, swiss in one hand. Then she raised her arm and
there was a flash of reflected light. He realized she had the swiss's
bubble-thin screen on its mirror setting.
She turned, suddenly aware of him, thinly disguised
shock on her face.
"You okay, Boss?"
She pinched the bridge of her nose. "Why didn't you
tell me how bad I really looked?"
"You're looking a lot better than when they found you."
She ran her hand over her head as if testing how thick
her hair was. It was the first time it had occurred to him that she
cared how she looked and that her current condition might distress her.
She'd always taken care of her appearance, but in an officer sort of
way that was more about polished boots and smart uniform than the usual
do-I-look-okay fussing of a woman. She'd had lovely long jet-black hair
and now she didn't. She had also had a nice arse, and that was gone
too, but she wouldn't know that.
"Sod it, I'm over a hundred and twenty." She forced a
smile but it was unconvincing. "And I've been a bit dead lately, so all
in all I'm looking okay for my age."
"We'll get you some decent fatigues made up."
"And boots. My boots didn't make it."
"I bet I can find a ussissi who can blag a pair from
Umeh Station."
"You're a good bloke, Ade."
"Salt of the earth, me."
"Come on, let's get on with rummaging Rayat's bloody
data."
She seemed crushed. But he didn't care what she looked
like right then and he knew Aras didn't either. It was enough to have
her back. He put a cautious hand under her elbow and gave her just
enough support to walk back into the living room with some dignity.
"It's all right," he said, giving Aras a
help-me-out-here look. "A couple more days and you'll look good as new.
It's not worth getting upset about."
"Do I look upset?"
"Yeah. Frankly, yeah, you do. Your hair's growing back
at a hell of a rate, though. You'll be back to normal before you know
it."
"Don't kid yourself it's about how I look." She placed
her swiss on the table and linked it up to Rayat's device again. Aras
sat down next to her and put his hand on her arm. "It's what's in
Rayat's handheld. It's a bit of a shock when you find that he was
briefed by Eugenie Perault. Remember her?"
"The minister who did your Suppressed Briefing for the
mission," said Ade.
"Go on, you might as well say it."
"The one who shanghaied you."
Shan stopped short of shaking Aras's hand off her arm,
but Ade could see she had braced her frail muscles. If she could do
that it was at least a sign that she was regenerating more tissue.
"Maybe," she said. "But I want to know why she briefed both
of us for the same mission. And I need to
know if the bitch knew what was really out here."
We demand the
following. We require the return of Minister Par Paral Ual, who acts
without authority: we demand that you hand over Aras Sar Iussan for
trial: and we demand that you withdraw your vessel from our space.
Official request from Minister Par Nir
Bedoi, Home Affairs, to the matriarchs of F'nar
F'nar Plain, November 3,
2376.
Esganikan's ship had become a city in its
own right.
Out on the plain, the vessel had changed shape and had
rearranged itself into a number of smooth shapes like a series of
bronze and blue bubbles. It solved the logistics problem of where F'nar
might put two thousand extra wess'har.
"Wow," said Eddie. He thought of the two shiplets that
had formed out of the main vessel and gone their own way. "How do they
do that?"
Nevyan, walking beside him, tugged at the neckline of
her dhren, the opalescent white wrap that
many of the matriarchs in F'nar wore. It formed itself immediately into
a cowl. "You call it nanotechnology." She pulled the dhren
apart as if ripping it and it opened along
an invisible seam like a zipper. "This fabric uses that principle. The
ship's materials are created the same way."
"For a bunch of nature lovers, you do employ some dodgy
hi-tech."
Nevyan zipped herself up again. "If it were dodgy,"
she said, "we would not be using it."
Eddie resigned himself to being a caveman again.
Wess'har had been a space-faring species when humans thought bows and
arrows were this year's must-have and were starting to realize wild
dogs could be their best friends. It put you in your place.
"I should have asked this a long time ago, Nevyan, but
how far back does the wess'har civilization go?"
"Define civilization."
"Building cities."
"Using your frame of reference, a million years."
"I'm not sure we'd got to grips with fire by then."
Eddie's brain gave up trying to examine the context and settled for
being awed. The wall-to-wall hard-science PhDs of the Thetis
payload had been gently patronizing
towards his humble anthropology degree, but he felt he was now the best
placed of all of them to see how astonishingly nothing Homo sapiens
was. "And you haven't started
living on pills or given up sex or uploaded your consciousness into
machines."
"Why would we want to do that? It sounds extremely
foolish."
"Well, we always tend to think that's what we'll be
doing in years to come."
"You're a very sad species," she said, without a hint
of sarcasm. "You want to eradicate all the things that make you a
living creature."
"Where were you when I was making documentaries?" Eddie
asked wistfully.
The camp of scattered ship-bits was busy with Eqbas
personnel, many of them females. One group was standing in a circle,
gazing down at something on the ground and occasionally crouching to
press their hands on the soil. Eddie let his bee cam loose. It made a
slow pass round them and one watched it in that same carefully hostile
way that Serrimissani did. He hoped it would take evasive action fast
enough if the Eqbas swatted it.
"What are they doing?" he asked.
"Finding a water course to tap into," said Nevyan. "They plan an
extended stay."
"And how do you feel about that?"
"Confused."
Nevyan walked past the hydrology team to where
Esganikan Gai stood watching the activity in her camp. It had the feel
of the Thetis mission, setting up a base
and trying not to look or feel permanent, two years and a whole messy
history ago.
Esganikan made a gesture with one straight arm,
beckoning Nevyan towards her like an aircraft director on a carrier's
deck. It struck Eddie as a little imperious. If she tried that on Shan
she'd get a rude awakening.
Shan. He hadn't been back
to see her yet and she'd been conscious for a couple of days according
to Serrimissani; the ussissi was a natural journalist if ever he saw
one. Poor old Shazza. She'd be in a
terrible state. He wondered if she'd recognize him. There was always
something embarrassingly painful about seeing a once-powerful person
reduced to frail dependence, a nasty tap on the shoulder from your own
mortality.
He started musing. What happens
to people when they realize they're never going
to die? Wow. The whole human existence is predicated on inevitable
death. Maybe Shan would recover enough to talk to him about
that. He hoped so. He hoped she would talk to him anyway, even if she
never gave him another story, and he accepted that he had finally gone
soft and begun caring about things other than his job. He wondered if
he'd have felt that way if he'd still been on Earth, in the daily fight
to get a story before any other bastard did.
"Greet you," said Esganikan, providing her own fluting
chorus. She made that aircraft controller's marshaling movement again.
"Learn English for Ual."
"Don't mind me," said Eddie. He stepped over the
threshold of a shiplet, now somehow relaxed into a bubble-shaped hut.
He found himself in a vestibule that put him in mind of the city of
Surang, organic curves and projections even more eccentric than
F'nar's. His bee cam followed him inside.
Nevyan knelt down opposite Esganikan and warbled at
her. Eddie decided to stay standing. There was an exchange that he
couldn't begin to follow but it appeared friendly enough. Then Nevyan
knelt very still, something Eddie had learned to interpret as a
negative reaction. She'd heard something that had surprised her.
"Clue me in," said Eddie.
"I'm asking her why she has so many isan've
with her," said Nevyan. "She says that
some isan've choose to leave their
families behind, in safety, or to delay bonding. It's the nature of
many missions."
"But you travel with your whole clan. Mestin took you
all on her tour of duty on Bezer'ej. Can't they?"
"We never travel outside this system," said Nevyan. "And it's a
relatively safe place." She listened intently to Esganikan
again. "She says that we have the luxury of a more backward life."
Backward. Eddie flinched. "Are you
going to smack her in the mouth for that?"
"Why?"
"Never mind. Can I take a look around the camp?"
Esganikan considered the request, trilling. "The
teaching?"
"What's she asking?"
"She asks if you have any text to accelerate her
learning of English."
"A book?" Eddie fumbled in his pockets and took out his
handheld. He hated the idea of being parted from it, but this was going
to make his life a lot easier. "There's a stack of dictionaries in
here, but no language course as such, and it wouldn't be wess'u to
English anyway. Not much help."
"A list of words and rules."
"Yes."
Trill, trill, warble. "That's what she
requires."
Eddie handed Esganikan the device with the BBChan logo
color-coded right through the casing and every component. "Don't break
it," he said. "It belongs to the company." He showed her the controls
with exaggerated gestures. "I've opened it at the right page. Can you
make a copy somehow?"
"Will learn," said Esganikan grimly.
"Yeah, I bet you will," said Eddie, and excused himself
while the girls did business.
He walked among the bubbles, nodding politely at any
Eqbas who looked his way. One of them watched the bee cam and walked
slowly after it, giving him a wonderful but sinister shot. Eventually
he recognized Shapakti. A sense of relief flooded him in the way it
always did when he was in completely unknown territory and spotted a
scrap of familiarity.
"Clever," said Eddie, pointing to the shiplet bubbles
and giving him a thumbs-up gesture. Gestures were always dangerous but
Eddie doubted there was enough cultural similarity between them for it
to mean something offensive. If he got a punch in the face he'd know
he'd guessed wrong.
Shapakti stared at Eddie's thumb and made an
exaggerated pointing gesture with both arms.
"Safety exits? You'll be coming round with drinks and
tax-free purchases later?"
Shapakti burbled and took him by the arm--gently, thank
God--to turn him to face the direction in which he'd pointed. "Gethes,"
he said. Well, that was clear enough.
"Who that gethes?"
Eddie shielded his eyes with one hand against the glare
from F'nar's terraces and focused. The frame was emaciated, and the
stride unsteady, but it was Shan. Ade walked behind her.
"Holy shit," said Eddie. You saw
her brought in. You saw how bad she was. "That's unbelievable."
"Who?" Shapkti constructed his English phrases like a
wall. "Who is that?"
Eddie wouldn't get emotional. She wouldn't like that,
not one bit. "Shapakti, old son, that's Shan
Chail. Frankland. Understand?"
"C'naatat?"
"That's it." Eddie, flushed with that perilous
enthusiasm that came with suddenly being understood in a strange
language, threw caution aside. "Shan Chail--isan.
Aras--jurej. Oursan. Yes?"
It was certainly an economic language. Shapakti made a
curious roll of his head and let out a long low trill that might have
been surprise. It could also have been complete incomprehension. They
waited, watching. Shan advanced, stumbling occasionally and being
steadied by Ade.
She looked terribly, terribly ill. That was a huge
improvement. She paused in front of him, a little shaky, hands on hips.
"Hi Eddie," she said. "Don't I even get a good morning?"
"Bad hair day, doll?"
"Remind me to introduce you to Mr. Truncheon."
"I really missed you, you old tart."
"It's good to see you too, you tosser. It really is."
He stopped short of hugging her. He wanted to. But c'naatat
made you cautious, even if you had no
breaks in your skin and the chance of infection was remote. He hoped
she realized that he cared.
Ade stared at Shapakti in a way that would have started
a fist fight on Earth. The Eqbas didn't react at all. He was focused on
Shan.
"Shan, this is Shapakti," said Eddie. "You've got his
attention."
Shapakti inhaled audibly. "Frankland."
"I might even let you call me Guv'nor," she said. "Teh, g'ne'hek
eqbas'u sve?"
"Hey, clever," said Eddie. She could do the two voices.
It was fascinating. "What did you say?"
"I've asked him if he'll teach me eqbas'u."
"Esganikan wants to learn English."
"Our gift to the world. We'll throw in cricket,
syphilis and bureaucracy for free." Shan raked one hand through her
hair, a little self-conscious. Eddie had never realized she cared how
she looked. "Is that a deal, Shapakti? Teh, mek?"
"Mek, chail," said
Shapakti.
"Good lad. Now let's go and see Esganikan."
"Why?" asked Eddie.
"Nosey bastard," said Shan, playing the police officer
again. "Because I'm an isan of F'nar and
she's on my manor, son. That's why."
Eddie pointed to the appropriate bubble. "In there.
Should you be up and about this soon?"
Shan ignored him with the practiced air of someone who
was used to asking all the questions and strode ahead, a credible
approximation of her old pace. Ade matched her stride. "I hear
Esganikan Gai is keen to know more about c'naatat.
Ade and I are going to show her."
"Be nice to her, won't you, Shan?"
"Any reason I shouldn't be?"
Shapakti fell in behind her, warbling and trilling. It
was simply melodic noise to Eddie, but Shan half-turned to deliver a
blast of wess'u at him. Shapakti dropped his head a little and lapsed
back into silence.
"What did he say?" asked Eddie.
"Cheeky bastard wanted to know if I give oursan
to the c'naatat
who hates him."
Shapakti meant Ade. Ade dropped his gaze and found his
boots of sudden and overwhelming interest.
"And what did you say?" said Eddie.
"Nosey bastard," said Shan.
Ual found F'nar an extraordinarily awkward
city. It was chaotic, disorderly and full of stairways. Isenj weren't
built for steep stairs.
The treads were too narrow for him to place his whole
bulk on them and he found himself tottering, trying to find purchase
with his rear and side legs and failing. Bipeds never had to worry
about such things.
"I suggest we stay at ground level," said Ralassi.
"If I'd known our stay would be extended, I would have
brought more supplies with us."
"The next shuttle will drop off some food, Minister. Do
you want to eat now?"
"Later."
"And do you intend to return to Umeh?"
"You think I can remain here?" Ual hadn't expected
this. He had anticipated the rage of his opponents--in government and
among the electorate--but he had not foreseen Eqbas dispatching a
vessel
to Umeh. "I've probably made a disastrous mistake, but I must try to
salvage something."
The Eqbas ship hadn't landed. It was just orbiting and
gathering data. It was the worst possible situation. How could he now
expect isenj to accept the assistance of the wess'har with one of their
ships looking like a potential aggressor? Now he had neither his
bargaining chip, as Eddie called it, nor a receptive audience for his
plan.
The first isenj ever to visit the enemy on a peaceful
mission had got it badly wrong. Ual knew he would go down in history
and memory as a fool rather than a visionary.
But he had come this far. The cycle of resentment and
decline and sporadic fruitless war had to
be broken. He made his way back down the passage to the Exchange of
Surplus Things and tried to find a corner in which to be inconspicuous.
Wess'har came to look at him, or so he thought; but
they appeared to be spending as much time sorting through containers of
food as studying him. They were all tall and irregularly
shaped--vertically symmetrical, yes, but all gangly limbs and long
faces.
Eddie, with his talent for comparing all beings to
species on his own world, called them sea horses. There were no longer
other animal species on Bezer'ej and there hadn't been for many, many
generations. Ual had nothing in his environment that he could compare
to the wess'har. It was the first time he had thought about the sadness
inherent in that.
But some wess'har were shorter than him. A small one
with a plume of stiff gold hair across the top of its head, just like
the big females, approached him and stood far too close to him. He was
a government minister. He'd earned the right to a little more personal
space.
"You're in trouble," said the wess'har in perfect
English. "I'm Giyadas. Nevyan took me as her daughter."
Ual decided she was an infant. As with isenj, it was
hard to tell a wess'har's age by their size: but wess'har had no
genetic memory to make them wise from birth, and none of the social
restraint that adult isenj learned. Adult wess'har seemed as outspoken
as young ones, often to the point of offense.
It was his first impression of them--big, gold, shiny,
and rude. They would never show the self-control needed to cope with
living at close quarters like his own people.
"Yes, I'm in a great deal of trouble," said Ual.
"Have the gethes shafted
you?"
"What does that mean?"
"Put you into a difficult position and then abandoned
you." The child looked up at him, tilting her head this way and that.
"Eddie taught me the word."
Ah. Eddie's accent was
discernible. "If you mean that the humans can do nothing more to aid us
in exchange for the things we have given them, yes."
"You're hard to understand."
He was a minister of state yet he was reduced to
chatting to a small alien child. This wasn't how Eddie's shuttle
diplomacy was supposed to work.
"My people won't like it at first, but I think we will
fare better by cooperating with your people than by fighting them.
There is an…inevitability about wess'har."
"You mean that we can take you any time we want."
Ual repeated the phrase to himself, appalled. Yes, it
was true. And now the Eqbas were involved it would
happen, sooner or later. Sooner and peacefully struck him as better
than a long noble fight to the last isenj. They had made that boast
before and lost. And there had been no last isenj, just millions more.
"More words that Eddie taught you?"
"Shan Frankland said it."
He had heard small snatches of information about Shan
Frankland and was trying to piece them together. Even dead, she seemed
still to be pivotal for the wess'har. "The dead officer."
"No, she lives."
Ual decided to let the comment go unquestioned. Humans
had some eccentric beliefs about noncorporeal existence and it seemed
that Giyadas had been exposed to them. "And what do you think of your
cousins from Eqbas Vorhi?"
"They're different."
Ual was being sociable. There was no harm in indulging
the child of a potential ally. Giyadas took his arm and tugged a little
more forcefully than he imagined such a small creature could.
"I want you to meet someone," she said.
Ual followed her patiently, maneuvering his bulk around
crates and containers while wess'har stood back to let him pass. They
didn't attack him or even hurl abuse. He was the enemy, the ancient
enemy, and he knew what would have happened if a wess'har had arrived
on Umeh. Isenj felt the old injustices as vividly now as their
forebears did in the days of Mjat.
But there was no hostility. If anything, they seemed no
more than mildly curious. He almost tripped over a strange cylindrical
fruit on the floor but a wess'har reached down and removed it from his
path.
I don't understand them at all.
Rude and considerate; peaceful and extravagantly violent;
technologically sophisticated and yet living a primitive rural life. And
they have never threatened Umeh.
Ual had come to negotiate, not to learn, but learning
was overwhelming him. No isenj could have any idea what they were
dealing with.
He shuffled out into the sunlight of a gloriously clear
day quite unlike any on polluted Umeh. The alleys and small courtyards
that made up the tangled ground level of terraced F'nar were fiercely
illuminated by the reflection from the pearl surfaces, the polar
opposite of Jejeno in every way he could imagine. Giyadas trotted
ahead, stopping every so often to check he was keeping up.
"Here," said Giyadas. She tilted her head and clasped
her hands, a miniature of the adult matriarchs. "He wanted to see you.
He says he's never met an isenj who wasn't trying to kill him or who he
wasn't trying to kill."
A huge alien that looked more human than anything
stepped out in front of him. He had a face that was all harsh angles,
and liquid dark eyes like the soldier Barencoin except that there was
far less white visible in them. He wasn't wess'har, and he wasn't
human. Ual couldn't identify his species.
The creature flicked a long dark braid of hair over his
collar and sniffed the air.
"I'm the Destroyer of Mjat," he said in immaculate
English. "I'm Aras Sar Iussan."
Eddie Michallat said there were monsters in human
history, and that humans often speculated on how they would exact their
social revenge if they met these long-dead criminals. But this monster
was not long dead; and now he was simply an extraordinary creature for
whom Ual could suddenly feel nothing but …astonishment.
This wess'har, or whatever he had become, was more than
fifty generations old. And he had survived being an isenj prisoner of
war, a very bitter war indeed.
Ual was glad his political rivals weren't there to hear
him. The first thing that came into his head was hardly what they would
have wanted. But he said it anyway.
"I'm truly sorry for what we did to you in captivity,"
said Ual.
Aras was completely still. Ual wondered if it was a
preparation to spring forward and attack like a ussissi, but the
Destroyer of Mjat simply stood there and didn't even blink.
"And I regret that I had to kill so many of you," he
said. "I remember, you see. I caught my c'naatat
parasite from your people when they cut me and tore me. So now I have
your genetic memory, and I know what it is to stand outside myself and
see me as I am."
"A rare gift," said Ual. "And perhaps one we should all
seek. Knowing what you do, then, would you destroy us again?"
"Under the same circumstances?" Aras tilted his head
sharply and Ual could clearly see the wess'har in him now. "Yes, of
course I would."
Ual took care not to touch him, but he approached close
enough to make it clear that he would follow him to talk further.
"Let us look for different circumstances," he said.
Shan hadn't seen Nevyan since she had last left
F'nar for Bezer'ej, a long cold lifetime ago. Esganikan could wait her
turn.
There was a distinct scent of mango in the air as Shan
entered the ship's detached section and it made her indefinably uneasy.
It was an indication of the presence of a dominant female under
challenge or threat, a pheromone powerful enough to make a ruling
matriarch cede her position and become deferential.
She could emit the pheromone herself, but now that she
had it back under conscious control again she wanted to keep it that
way. Wess'har couldn't override their scent reactions; she could. C'naatat
had somehow provided her with the
capacity for tact that she'd never had as a regular human being and now
it was time she used it.
And there was Nevyan, bobbing her chess-piece head and
craning her neck to see who was entering the compartment.
You saved me, kid. You saved me.
Shan stepped forward.
She'd never been comfortable with displays of emotion.
Any sane person would have flung their arms around their rescuer,
grateful and tearful. Shan wanted to, but the old control born of years
of barricading herself against the world took the impulse and crushed
it before she could follow it.
But this was still her friend, the woman who hadn't
abandoned her to space.
"I'm not sure where to start." Shan reverted to English
for a moment. "Thank you doesn't quite cover it."
Nevyan's scent-burst of contentment--sweet powdery
musk--almost overwhelmed the mango aromas. "My friend," she said. "Oh,
my friend, it's good to see you." She made an awkward move forward and
the two of them stood on that precarious brink of actually touching.
Neither stepped over it. Mestin would touch her, always with a
reassuring layer of fabric between her and Shan's skin, but most were
still cautious. "Look how well you are."
Well was relative. "I'm
in your debt."
"It's enough for me to see you alive. You owe me
nothing."
Esganikan, a head taller than Shan even without the
magnificent plume of copper hair, watched them intently. "You're the c'naatat."
"Actually, I'm Superintendent Shan Frankland." Don't
start a ruck. Don't start effing and blinding at
her. "And this is my… colleague, Ade Bennett. He caught the
parasite too. Neither of us planned to, believe me."
"I want to know all about this organism. Is it true you
survived in space?"
"I'm here, aren't I?"
"I don't understand."
Rhetorical. She doesn't get it. "Yes.
It's true."
At first Shan was distracted by the growing intensity
of the dominance pheromone--discernible, but not provocative--and then
she was struck by the fact that the interior of the ship was utterly
alien: not just wess'har alien, but alien
alien. There were the trademark organic curves and loops, but the
bulkheads were a mass of shifting light and lines, all intense detail
and movement.
Shan put her hand on the bulkhead and familiar violet
and ruby points of light rippled under the skin of her fingers. Her
bioluminescent signaling was back. It tried to match the colors she
touched, attempting to respond.
Esganikan studied Shan carefully with much
head-tilting, then stared at Ade for a few moments. He stood with his
feet slightly apart, smartly upright, hands clasped behind his back.
"You carry more than the life-form itself, then."
"I do indeed." Shan flexed her hands, fist to fingers
to fist, and the full spectrum of colors illuminated them. "A few genes
from the bezeri. Aras is the expert in c'naatat
activity, if anybody is, and you can see how much it's changed him. It
scavenges genetic material."
"You and your kind are exceptionally dangerous."
"Yes, I realize what gethes
can do."
"I meant c'naatat."
Shan felt something like solidity--and she had no better
word for it--settling and spreading in her chest. It wasn't the cold
constriction of adrenaline when she was sizing up for a fight: she knew
that only too well, primal aggression poisoned a little by fear. No,
this was her. This was the her she had discovered when
helpless in the void
with only her mind for refuge. A voice inside said try
it, go on, see what I'm really made of. She silenced it. This
wasn't the time to create divisions.
"I know," Shan said carefully. "That's why I ditched
myself in space. That's why Aras spent centuries in exile, that's why
Ade gave himself up, and I'm afraid that's why Rayat and Neville
detonated bombs on Ouzhari. We're not about to hand it over."
Esganikan smelled dominant.
Shan was fully aware of it but now it was touching her in some way,
making her… cautious. Suddenly she realized what was happening to her.
She's backing you down. She's
outscenting you. It started the minute you walked through that hatch.
Shan let go of her control. Her fragile abdominal
muscles tightened and she let her skin release the scent that said I'm
the Guv'nor, so don't fuck with me.
Esganikan's shoulders relaxed a little. Shan felt the
moment pass. It was fleeting, insubstantial: she didn't like this
silent game at all, but she had emitted enough scent to pro duce the
reaction. She glanced at Nevyan, who was absolutely still with her
muscles locked.
"Will you let us assess the symbiont?" said Esganikan.
"I'll think about it," said Shan. Yeah,
don't try it on with me again, sunshine. "I want to see the
prisoners."
"Why?"
"I'm a police officer, even if the police force I
served is long gone. You know what police are, do you?"
"I do now."
"I need to find out things from one of these prisoners."
"Will you try to free them?"
"Of course not."
"Then speak to them, but don't execute them." It was a
casual remark, symptomatic of that odd wess'har ambiguity about respect
for life. "We do not yet know if they will be of use to us in dealing
with your governments."
Your governments. So she
was still almost a gethes, but at least
Esganikan now knew who the Guv'nor was. She was going to have to talk
to Nevyan about this.
Nevyan followed Shan and Ade back outside. At a
discreet distance from the fragmented Eqbas vessel, Shan caught Nevyan
by her elbow. She flinched.
"Are you okay dealing with Esganikan?"
Nevyan's hands were clasped carefully in front of her,
multijointed fingers meshed in a way that a human would have found
painfully impossible. "It's confusing."
"Why?"
"I find myself disagreeing with her, but she's very
dominant."
"So? You're dominant."
"I find I want to disagree about our relations with
Umeh."
"It's none of my business, but--"
Ade cut in. "You're right, it's not, Boss. Stay out of
it for a while. Please. Get some rest."
"Yes, I need your counsel," said Nevyan, ignoring him.
Ade's male opinion didn't register on the scale. "She's set on a course
of action and I have doubts. Why do I feel like this? Where is our
natural consensus?"
"Maybe she's just bloody wrong,"
said Shan, still rattled by the encounter herself. "What's bothering
you?"
"Umeh," she said. "At first, its only relevance was the
human enclave. Then Ual asked for our assistance with his world's
environmental pressures."
"That's a brave move." Shan looked first for the
political flanker that Ual might be pulling but couldn't think of one
right then. There had to be one. "Are you
going to help them?"
"Help is a relative term," said Nevyan. "Esganikan is
very keen to assist, so keen that she plans to land a contingent on
Umeh, with or without the consent of the various regional governments."
Shan thought about it for a while, chewing her lip. Her
legs were feeling the strain of a long walk and Ade put a proprietorial
hand on her back, steering her. He said absolutely nothing. He was just
comfortingly there.
"We have a word for that," Shan said. Ade was right; it
was none of her business, but she'd played
a role in bringing disaster to Cavanagh's Star and she never left a
mess for someone else to clear up. "We call it invasion."
The bowl of fried peppers was the first solid
food that Lindsay had eaten in nearly forty-eight hours. The sound of
Rayat's chewing irritated her and she couldn't work out why it seemed
so loud given the constant clamor of wess'har voices and clattering
glass in the warrenlike home that was now their prison.
She tried to shut it out.
"No locks," said Rayat. "In fact, no doors."
"So try walking out of here."
"Why do you think they haven't killed us?"
There was a sudden peal of trills somewhere in the
house, almost a shriek. Lindsay dropped the bowl and last few strips of
peppers spilled across the flagstone floor. Then the musical voices
resumed their normal pattern. A scent like fruit--peach, mango,
apricot?--wafted through the doorway. Wess'har always seemed to be
cooking something. Lindsay's stomach was still growling in response to
every aroma.
"Maybe the Eqbas branch of the family does things
differently." She picked up the bowl and scooped the peppers back into
it, unsure when the next meal was coming, if ever. Wess'har seemed to
be conscientious about clean floors so she ate what she retrieved.
Rayat, perched on one of the rock-hard recesses, looked down his nose
at her and carried on chomping.
"Got a problem?" asked Lindsay. She wiped her finger
around the bowl and sucked off the last scrap of oily sauce.
Rayat shrugged. "We were never much of a team, you and
I, were we?"
"No. Not any sort of team."
"What do you want to happen?"
"What?"
"Rescue? Return?"
"Die, and get it over with. I've lost my baby, I've got
nothing to go back to and I'd have to live with being a war criminal."
She checked the bowl. It was hard to see if she'd missed any liquid
because the vessel was brown and amber swirled glass--hard glass, the
sort that could stand being dropped, the sort that the colonists had
used to make the bells of St. Francis Church in Constantine. What was
happening to the colonists now? "And that's before I think about what
the wess'har and the isenj will do to Earth. No, dead's good for me.
How about you? I think dead would be good for you, too."
"I didn't plan to kill any bezeri."
"You didn't plan to completely eradicate c'naatat
either, did you?" She recalled his
anger when he found she'd let Shan step out of the airlock. "Asset
denial has a lot of meanings."
Rayat remained irritatingly calm. "In the right hands,
it could have been immeasurably valuable. But it's gone now. And we can
forget about Aras."
Gone. Right. But Ade
Bennett was here. What if he really did get homesick and want to leave?
No, Ade had an unshakeable sense of duty, just like bloody Shan
Frankland. And even if Rayat found out what he'd become, there was
nothing he could do about it, not here.
But she liked the idea of seeing the look on Rayat's
face if he ever found out. It was a little comforting scrap of childish
vengeance before she died, nothing more. And someone else could pull
the trigger, no grenade and no self-inflicted pain. She could just
about handle that. Shut your eyes, think
something profound, and try to go with some dignity. Yes, it was
almost a relief.
Rayat swung his legs off the ledge and ambled towards
the door.
"Where are you off to?" she demanded.
"Perhaps I can have a chat with someone," he said. "If
they haven't done their usual summary execution, perhaps there's some
room for negotiation after all."
Lindsay watched him walk through the opening and heard
his steps fade in the corridor. She hoped they shot him. What did their
weapons do, anyway? She'd never seen them fire one. They looked more
like brass musical instruments than weapons.
And there was no more sauce. She put the bowl down on
the ledge and sat down with her back against the wall and her eyes
closed.
A few minutes later there were footsteps outside again,
not the scrabbling dog-steps of ussissi or the thud of a wess'har's
gait, but the steps of more than one human.
"Is that you, Eddie?" she called. She didn't need him
to mediate for her. She wanted it all to end. "Ade?"
But it was Rayat who walked back through the door, and
for once his face was a perfect picture of shock.
Lindsay wondered what might be enough to shock a spy.
God, maybe he'd run into Ade. He knew.
Well--
But it wasn't Ade, and it wasn't Eddie. Rayat, stunned
silent, was staring at Lindsay. It was one of those moments when what
she saw didn't make sense, but she saw it anyway.
There was a gun to Rayat's head and holding it was a
nightmarishly emaciated figure with very short, scrubby dark hair in a
loose black uniform. The gun clicked, a good old-fashioned 9mm pistol.
"Okay, sunshine," said a dead woman's voice. "I haven't
said this for years. You're fucking nicked."
It was Shan Frankland. Dead, dead, dead
Shan Frankland.
Creatures without
feet have my love,
And likewise do those with two feet,
And those with four feet I love,
And those too with many feet.
THE BUDDHA,
566–486 BCE
Shan began slipping the 9mm pistol in the
back of her belt out of habit, and then found her trousers weren't
tight enough even with the belt on its last notch to hold it securely.
She slid the gun discreetly into her pocket. She didn't
want to ruin a grand entrance by letting it clatter to the floor down
the leg of her pants.
Lindsay probably wouldn't have noticed anyway. She was
still sitting against the wall, hands pressed flat on the floor and
mouth slackly open in classic theatrical shock. An actor might have
made a better job of it.
Cobalt.
Lindsay was everything Shan despised, the apparently
compassionate woman with short-sighted, pig-eyed self-interest buried
not far beneath her normal, reasonable girly veneer. Shan wanted to
hurt her, and badly. But she had information to extract.
She stood staring at Rayat, a man as unkempt and as far
from the image of a spy as it was possible to get. She'd never noticed
he had so much gray in his dark hair before. What was the rate of
violent exchange for genocide? A good kicking? Knee-capping? Holding
his head under water a few times--a lot of times? She'd done it all,
and
worse, and not one of those recalled acts gave her that light-headed,
throat-stopping sensation of savage animal release that made her feel
some score had been settled in the universe.
"Sit down," she said.
Rayat was looking her up and down without moving his
head, eyes darting, and he had never seemed to be a man who shocked
easily. She was glad she'd found his threshold. It was a childish
thing, but she'd learned a long time ago that a copper needed to know
how to make the right entrance. It often saved a lot of work.
"I said sit the fuck down."
Rayat paused for three beats before sitting slowly.
Shan meshed her hands, pushing her gloves hard back on her fingers
until the webs of skin hurt. His gaze settled on them for a telling
second. Oh, he's afraid I'm going to belt him.
No--he's wondering if he can pick up a dose if I thump him, the sly
bastard. He never gives up.
Shan swallowed her temper. "I've not been well lately,
you know."
"You stepped out the hatch," said Rayat.
"Nothing wrong with your memory, then."
"You stepped out the hatch."
"I think you already said that."
Rayat was doing better than Lindsay. She was still
sitting on the floor, staring, silent. "Just tell me how."
Shan spread her arms and shrugged. "Beats me. I expect
you already realized I'm not like other girls." She wandered across the
room. Unbidden, Lindsay placed her hands back against the wall and
edged up it. It was a clumsy way to stand when she could have knelt
first, but maybe she was expecting a boot in the face. Shan met her
horrified eyes. Looking cadaverous had its advantages. "You stupid,
selfish little cow."
"Oh God," said Lindsay. "How did you…?"
"Survive without a suit? It's the first minute that's
the worst. Want to try it?"
"Oh God."
"Too fucking quick for you. I ought to let the ussissi
shred you."
"Get it over with."
"Esganikan would rather I didn't. Not yet."
Neither of them had finished helping
with inquiries, as her old sergeant used to say. There were
helpful people, and there were people who needed some help to be
helpful. Either way was fine by her.
Rayat was made of sterner stuff than Lindsay, or at
least he seemed to think he was. Shan kept an open mind. He was
certainly managing to be more coherent.
"Okay, Superintendent, I know your record with
prisoners. You enjoyed your work."
"Don't flatter yourself," said Shan. "What was in your
Suppressed Briefing from Perault? Everyone knows what was in mine."
"Why does that matter to you now?"
"Good old-fashioned copper's need to know. What was
your primary task?"
Rayat looked through her. There was a definite shift in
his expression, as if it was part of a mechanism he'd adopted to resist
interrogation. Shan thought that if she were an agent who had no
further mission and no chance of escape or survival, then the last
thing left to preserve sanity was the satisfaction of thwarting the
enemy in some small way.
She could have beaten the answer out of him, given
time. He wasn't all that different from her, hanging on to his sense of
self in a lonely and frightening place.
But understanding him didn't excuse his crime.
Bastard.
She felt something primeval flare up from her gut and
the kick she aimed at him came straight from her subconscious. It
caught him under the arm, right in the ribs. He didn't even scream.
They usually did.
"Come on, you shit-house." He curled up instinctively,
hands shielding his head. The shock from the next kick traveled back up
her leg, and it hurt. "You can take me, can't you? You're trained.
You're hard.
What do you want? Want me to draw enough blood that you catch this
fucking thing?" She stamped down hard on his ankle because she couldn't
get at his balls. She was light-headed and it wasn't from exhaustion.
She'd tipped over this brink of rage before. "Get up, you bastard. Come
on, you murdering heap of shit--"
He rolled over on his back, gasping. "You're a--" he
began, but that was as far as he got because she didn't want to hear,
and she didn't want to argue, and she didn't want him to get up again.
She kicked him in the back and the kidneys and anywhere else she could
reach. She kicked him until she staggered to a halt with exhaustion and
all she could hear were his grunts of pain and--at last--her own
gasping
breath.
If she'd been fitter, heavier, she knew she would have
killed him. She'd come as close to killing someone before but she knew
when to stop in those days. Whatever Rayat knew didn't matter right
then. She wanted destruction. She loathed herself for that and wasn't
sure why.
She managed to haul him into a sitting position by his
collar so that his face was inches from her. "Do you know what you've
done? Do you fucking know?"
Lindsay was completely silent, watching them warily.
Rayat uncoiled and spat blood on the floor, white-faced
and trembling. But she couldn't make him scream. God, she wanted to.
"You're an animal," he said hoarsely. "And if you think
you're hard enough to beat anything out of me, you've got a long job
ahead of you, bitch."
"Then maybe I'll settle for just making you fucking bleed."
Lindsay was pressed flat against the wall, silent,
trying not to be noticed. Shan forced herself upright and walked out.
She got to Fersanye's door and Ade--made to wait
outside--caught her before she collapsed.
"What the hell happened?" Ade had a tight grip on her
arms. "Did he hurt you?"
"The fuck he did," she said. "I kicked the shit out of
him."
"Good for you, but--"
"But it wasn't for the bezeri." The realization crashed
in on her. "It was for me."
It was accumulated rage; rage at being set up, being
shanghaied, being used, being turned into a freak, being expected to
clear up everyone else's shit, freeze-boiling to the point of death and
beyond…and being caught between black and white.
So Rayat killed thousands. Aras
killed millions.
But she could still see the difference, just as she
could still feel that Perault's motive for consigning her here mattered
even though her wess'har side didn't
give a toss.
If Rayat thought that calling her an animal was an
insult, he hadn't understood her at all.
Human would have been
much, much worse.
Aras found the smell that Shan called forest
floor more than distracting. It came
close to unbearable.
It took him back to the time long before the first
humans came to Bezer'ej, five hundred years ago, when he huddled in an
isenj cell on an island called Ouzhari. The smell told him his jailers
were coming to inflict more tortures on him. He had looked much like
any other wess'har in those days. Minister Ual reeked of that scent.
"I never thought we would have this conversation," said
Ual. He lapped from a bowl of yeast broth. Wess'har busy drying sliced lurisj
in one of the courtyards paused to look
at him and then went back to their task. "Without our human friends, we
would never have had a common language to do so anyway."
Aras felt the skin rip from his back again. Murderer,
monster, child-killer. You don't deserve any
better. He ignored the insistent smell of wet leaves. "They have
their positive elements."
"Perhaps that's their purpose. A catalyst."
Aras had heard enough of purpose and pattern from
BenGarrod and his descendants. "We had reached a satisfactory
equilibrium before they arrived. Did their purpose include destroying
the bezeri?"
It wasn't Ual's fault. He hadn't settled on Bezer'ej,
and he hadn't tortured him. Aras couldn't understand why he was
experiencing this flashback so intensely now when he had lived with the
accurate, unchanging memory for so long. Shan had inherited the
memories. She'd reacted badly to them as well. He tried to shake off
the intrusive images because they were producing an anger in him that
wasn't his.
"Are you unwell, Aras?"
It was odd to hear an isenj call him by name. "No, I'm
remembering what your people did to me."
"You can also remember what you did to them."
"I can."
A white ball of fire rolled down
the street and the screams were deafening. He hid, calling for his
family when the silence fell.
But it was the memory of an isenj. And he could recall
his own astonishing survival when the prison was attacked and smashed
to rubble, and how his comrades couldn't understand how he had survived
such an ordeal. It had seemed a blessing, a vital advantage to share
with other troops when the small wess'har army faced millions of isenj.
Nobody had known what it really was in the early days.
They found out soon enough.
"Can you do for Umeh what you did for Asht? I
apologize--what you did for Bezer'ej." Ual
corrected himself, perhaps making a deliberate point that he could
accept massive cultural change. "And by that I mean reversing
environmental damage, not… reduction in population."
"Of course we could," said Aras. "But you must be aware
that you can't sustain the population you have and still restore your
environment. Do you recall any natural environment on your world?"
"We do," said Ual. "Our memories span generations."
"And where will you find the species with which you
once shared Umeh? Do you have a gene bank like the one the gethes
brought with them to Bezer'ej?"
"No."
"Then what can be restored?"
There was no answer to that: a Umeh rich in
biodiversity was a memory, no more than that. Ual lapped his drink
again. He was decorated with hundreds of small blue rattling gems that
caught the light. Isenj had always liked shiny objects.
Aras recalled the musty, sulphurous flavor of the yeast
broth. He had never tasted it but he had the memory, just as he could
relive the moment when a petrol bomb exploded against Shan's riot
shield or when she had beaten a criminal until she broke his bones.
"We need to find a way of reducing the pressure on
Umeh," said Ual.
"You must accept that there must be fewer of you."
"I have invited wess'har intervention. I had hoped for
a solution I might be able to… what's the human expression?… sell
to my people."
"I think you need to discuss this with Esganikan Gai."
Aras was remembering far too much now. His distant past churned up
again. His first isan, long dead by her
own hand, unable to tolerate endless life: Cimesiat and all his
comrades contaminated by c'naatat: and the
years in Constantine with the alien newcomers whose strange belief in
invisible forces had always managed not to conflict with the principles
of Targassat until now. "I find it interesting that we all spend so
much time letting the past influence the present, when it no longer
exists. We all let our personal World Before rule the world that is."
But there was a previous
time he wanted to find again rather than forget. He wanted to walk away
and return to some semblance of a peaceful life with Shan, and he had a
second chance to do that now. Eqbas Vorhi was more than capable of
taking on the task of restoring Umeh and even Bezer'ej. He'd done his
duty and now it was over.
But even now Shan was struggling around F'nar,
pretending she was fit and able to be the Guv'nor again. No, she had
done her duty too, and even duty was finite. Aras thought of the Baral
Plain, his birthplace, quiet and remote and truly cold in winter. They
could live there, Ade as well. Ade liked snow.
"Forgetting the past is a monumental task for a species
with genetic memory," said Ual. "But it's exactly what we have to do.
Most isenj will resist Eqbas Vorhi's help--will your people help me
convince them?"
Aras stood up. He couldn't stand the smell of decaying
leaves any longer. "Will you excuse me? I must find my isan."
He beckoned to Giyadas, watching them
from a discreet distance with unblinking yellow eyes. "The future
matriarch of F'nar will keep you company for the time being."
He walked home up the terraces, willing Shan to be
there when he returned. He needed comfort. His need made him feel
guilty because she was the one in need of care, but for the first time
in centuries he felt that he had lost control. When he opened the door,
Shan was sitting at the table while Ade stirred a pot on the range.
Aras could smell her distress. She wasn't bothering to
suppress it. Ade raised his eyebrows in mute warning.
"What's wrong, isan?"
"Nothing. I gave that shit Rayat a good hiding. And
what happened to you? I can smell you from
here."
"I spoke to Ual." He knew that would silence her. "I
haven't had a conversation with an isenj since I was their captive."
Neither Shan nor Ade needed an explanation. C'naatat,
for all its disadvantages, was also a
conduit for understanding. Ade had never mentioned inheriting those
memories but his reaction told Aras that he had. The marine ruffled
Aras's hair in that roughly affectionate manner of human males anxious
not to appear oversentimental.
"I'm sorry, mate," said Ade. He patted Aras's back a
few times and withdrew to the range to resume his cooking, a
house-brother in every sense but one. It had been a very long time
since Aras had felt that. He missed the intimacy.
"Did it help you?" asked Shan.
"It disturbed me. But it's done. I mustn't live in the
past when there's so much time ahead to deal with."
"They're going to invade Umeh, aren't they?"
"Eqbas? Ual has invited them, as we did, whether his
people want them or not. Let's see what happens."
Shan reached out and put her hand on his and they sat
that way in silence for a few minutes, not looking at each other.
"You're right," she said. "There's a lot to be said for clean slates."
Aras meshed his fingers in Shan's and tightened his
grip. Ade poured the contents of the pan into a bowl and set it on the
table with some mugs. It was very good soup.
"You're not a bad cook at all, Ade," said Shan. And for
a moment she looked at Ade in a way that told Aras he did not exist.
It was a fraction of a second, no
more.
Wess'har males can't be jealous.
And I want a house-brother.
It was just a random flash of silly human jealousy,
another facet of the gethes' greed for
more than they needed. C'naatat normally
dispensed with inherited traits that it found troublesome. Aras hoped
it would purge him of this one before it became intrusive.
"That's Mar'an'cas," said Nevyan. "The human
colony appears to be surviving."
"Why didn't you kill them all when they first tried to
land on Bezer'ej?" asked Esganikan.
The spray whipped up from the sea. Jon Becken seemed
comfortable steering the boat so Nevyan let him and knelt down on the
curved deck. Her dhren shaped itself high
around her neck against the cold northern weather.
"They were harmless in those days," she said. "And they
brought other species with them."
"This is the gene bank I hear about."
"They thought they could preserve Earth's life-forms
and then return them when the planet was fit to be restored."
Esganikan made an approving urrrr. "A
task we can perform. They aren't all despoilers, then."
Becken turned to Webster and Barencoin while he held
his hand above the controls to correct the course. The marines chatted,
either oblivious or uncaring of the fact that Nevyan could understand
them. Their conversation consisted of speculation about Shan's
survival, which they deemed fucking amazing,
and the weird shit Ade had got himself into.
Nevyan turned to them. "Yes, it is indeed fucking
amazing," she said, and her comment seemed to silence them. She hadn't
intended it to.
"Tell me more about the gene bank," said Esganikan,
glancing Barencoin's way. "In English."
"The colony brought it with them and Shan was sent to
retrieve the strains of edible plants for free distribution on Earth.
Human organizations make living things like food plants into
commodities that only they can sell to other humans."
"I am not sure I fully understand sell."
"A barter system. They license
seeds and even other beings, altered genetically so they can track and
control them."
"What do they exchange for food, then, if they have no
free access to food plants?"
"Labor."
Esganikan pondered the concept. "So they are
cooperative?"
"No, their entire society revolves around individuals
acquiring more than is necessary."
"The more you tell me about gethes,
the more I feel they are overdue for our intervention. And what about
the other life-forms in this bank?"
"Shan was sent to retrieve unlicensed food plants to break the
cartels. She had no orders regarding
other species."
Esganikan looked at the marines and then faced the bow
of the boat again. "There is no consensus among humans."
"No, they all believe and act differently."
"Then we should differentiate between them. We should
separate the gethes from those who can be
wess'har."
Barencoin appeared to take notice of that. Perhaps it
had some significance for him, because he looked annoyed. Nevyan
glanced at him and he turned away.
When they landed on the island the two marines Qureshi
and Chahal were waiting for them. They jogged down to the waterline and
exchanged slaps on the back and embraces with the three other soldiers.
Whatever privations they faced, they seemed content in each other's
company. Nevyan thought that their communal spirit was an encouraging
sign.
Nevyan had seen the colonists of Constantine when she
was stationed at the Temporary City on Bezer'ej with her mother Mestin.
The colony had never been a problem, quiet and absorbed in its pursuit
of strange invisible beliefs of noncorporeal life, and it was properly
invisible itself, buried in the excavated settlement modeled on Aras's
memories of his home city of Iussan. And then the harmless humans had
become gethes after all, true to their
nature, helping Rayat and Neville. Perhaps it was not possible to find
many wess'har among them.
Some gathered at the route into their camp of fabric
shelters. There were males and females, some clutching small children.
And they stank of misery. Nevyan knew an unhappy human when she smelled
one.
"I want the person called Jonathan who helped Joshua
Garrod enable the gethes to bomb Ouzhari,"
said Esganikan.
Nevyan wondered if they had understood her, because her
rapid acquisition of English had not included perfecting the accent of
a single-voiced creature. There was a collective murmur that seemed
like one moan of despair. It seemed that they had.
"If you don't fetch him, then you condone what he did,
and you will be balanced too," she said.
"Like every godless fascist regime that's ever been,"
said a man at the front. "Burn the churches, punish the innocent, show
others what happens to the disobedient. But God will judge you."
Esganikan met the reaction with an explanation, as was
proper. "How can you be innocent if you prevent what's right? This is
to balance the genocide of the bezeri. If you prevent that, you become
part of it. I have no wish to show anyone anything. I care only what
you do, not what you think."
They looked back at her, unmoving.
"Okay, I'll do it," said Barencoin.
"No, mate, that's where I draw the fucking line," said
Becken. "I'm not hunting civvies for someone to kill them. That's not
what we do." Becken glanced at Nevyan. He was a young pale man with a
badly scarred nose. "No offense, ma'am."
Barencoin slipped his rifle off his shoulder. "He knew
they were nuclear bombs, and if he hadn't helped Neville and Rayat, we
wouldn't be in this shit now."
"Yeah, Mart, and we helped the bitch too, didn't we? Or
you fucking well did. You landed the devices on the planet."
"Okay, I should have shot her and Rayat and had done
with it. But I didn't. So now I do things right. Okay?"
He stepped forward. The little rank of colonists looked
about to part and then closed up again. Esganikan watched, apparently
fascinated.
"Come on, hand him over," Barencoin said quietly. "They
mean it. Wess'har don't piss about, and you know that better than
anyone." He paused. "Anyway, Shan Frankland's back, and if you don't
fetch him now she'll come and drag him out by his balls."
The colonists stared at him. "She's dead."
"Well, she's not dead now," said Barencoin.
"She's alive? Alive?"
"Yeah, but don't read anything freaky into it, will
you? God wasn't involved. He's not taking calls, in case you hadn't
noticed."
Barencoin motioned with his rifle for them to let him
pass but they didn't move. He sighed and simply walked forward, and then
they parted.
Nevyan and Esganikan followed him. Nevyan found it
interesting that humans could be so compliant even when they
outnumbered their captors. There were around a thousand here and many
emerged from their tents to watch.
Barencoin cleared a path without even trying. He might
have been behaving in that way humans called bluffing,
but nobody seemed to want to test him. Nevyan thought she recognized
one or two of the colonists but it was hard to tell.
"Now that Joshua Garrod is dead, who speaks for you?"
she asked.
"Try his wife, Deborah," said a woman. "Or Martin
Tyndale."
She didn't recognize Deborah Garrod at all. The woman
seemed neither hostile nor afraid, and she had youngsters with her, a
small female and an almost fully grown male. She indicated the interior
of the tent. "It's cold out here," she said. "Can we talk inside?"
Esganikan ducked beneath the bar above the opening. The
tent was a chaos of fabric and boxes and stank of stale food. Nevyan
was aware of the young male's fixed stare.
"What's your name?" she asked.
"James," he said.
"You intend to restore Earth," said Esganikan.
"Our forefathers came to Bezer'ej for refuge, to wait
it out until the world was ready," said Deborah. "However long it took."
"And what do you want to do now?"
Deborah shrugged. "If prayers could be answered? To
turn back time. If not--I was going to say that we would like to go
home, but Bezer'ej is the only home we've ever known."
"Would you prefer to return to your homeworld?"
"If the time was right. If the purpose could be
fulfilled."
"We can make it the right time," said Esganikan.
Perhaps she was overconfident of her new language
skills. Nevyan watched her, baffled, a little hesitant because the
matriarch's dominance pheromone was so convincingly powerful, as strong
as her own and sometimes close to overwhelming her.
"How?" Deborah asked.
"You wish to restore your environment. That is what we
do, what we have always done. We can do it for you, and with your
cooperation."
There was something about Esganikan's effortlessly
clear focus that reminded Nevyan of Shan. This was a female used to
getting things done. But this was not her friend, not someone she knew
well and who had her interests and those of her city at heart: wess'har
or not, Esganikan was a stranger.
"Are you offering to take us back?" said Deborah.
"Yes, and the rest of the life from your world."
"And what about Jonathan Burgh?"
"He must be balanced."
"So ifwe hand him over the rest ofus can go… home."
"The two are not connected. If none of you hand him
over, then none of you will go home, because I will have to balance all
of you for complicity in his action. It is not a condition, nor is it
bargaining, because we do not make bargains. It is merely a
consequence."
"It's a fascinating distinction." Deborah thought for a
while, her head in her hands.
James glared at Nevyan and lowered his voice. "Are we
just going to let them do what they did to Dad?"
"The bezeri died, James."
"It was an accident. He didn't mean it to happen like
that. He was destroying the Devil's temptation."
"James, we became involved with weapons that we should
have shunned, and we're paying the price of tolerating violence. Don't
you think I miss him? Don't you think it breaks my heart too?" She
turned James around by his shoulders. "Go and find Jonathan. Tell him
he can choose whether or not to surrender. It's up to him. It's not our
place to make him."
Nevyan watched, fascinated by the ethical knots the
woman had tied and untied. Their logic was wholly alien to her. If
Jonathan acted for himself, then Deborah would be innocent of his
death. But he would still be dead. In the end, motives counted for
nothing but humans never saw it that way. They lived in their heads,
not in the world. Perhaps that was why they could never respect life
that wasn't like them.
She waited with Esganikan in complete silence;
Barencoin stuck his head through the tent flap a few times to see what
was happening and then withdrew. Nevyan walked outside and found him
standing in a tight group with the other marines, talking in a low
voice, rifle cradled in his arms.
"Who's going to do it, ma'am?" he asked.
"I think we've been here before," said Qureshi. "With
Parekh."
"It's not your responsibility to execute our prisoners.
We'll do it."
Esganikan wandered out to wait with them, effectively
stifling all conversation. From time to time she reached into her
quilted tunic and took out a hand weapon, a smooth dull blue cylinder
notched with small finger-shaped indentations to create a grip. Nevyan
watched the marines, wondering if they realized what the instrument
was. And they watched Esganikan discreetly. They weren't fools.
"There," said Qureshi.
James Garrod appeared out of the mass of colonists with
a man--a man with a gray and stricken face--trailing behind him. So
this
was Jonathan Burgh. There was nothing about him that would have helped
Nevyan single him out as foolishly obedient or violent or even
memorable. James kept his gaze on the ground and indicated Jonathan
with a gesture over his shoulder.
He looked as if he felt he had betrayed him. It was a
curious kind of morality. It seemed hard for humans to feel that same
shame for their treatment of beings who didn't look like them.
"I don't want to die," said Jonathan Burgh.
"Very few creatures do," said Esganikan.
She took him down to the shore. Nevyan stayed back to
make sure the marines didn't intervene, but they were discussing
whether they should stay on Mar'an'cas. Webster wanted to work on the
water and power supplies. Nevyan was impressed by their pragmatism.
There was a loud snap from
the direction of the shore, and then another. The camp fell silent. The
marines paused in their conversation too, and then went on talking in
slightly different tones.
"I could get this place running a lot better," Webster
said. She stopped a man walking past. "Look, do you want us to stay?
Can we get some of the solar plant sorted for you?"
"Get out," said the man. "We don't want you here."
"I love civvies," said Barencoin. "Ungrateful fuckers."
"Well, then," said Qureshi. "Our own government doesn't
want us and neither does this lot. Anyone for F'nar?"
Esganikan appeared again, tidy and unmoved. Except for
Barencoin, none of the marines would look at her. She cocked her head
and Nevyan followed her back to the boat. The vessel sat lower in the
water on the return journey, weighed down by two extra passengers, and
Becken took it a little more slowly.
"I like your friend Shan," said Esganikan. "I
understand her. She has clear purpose. She acts wess'har."
"And you seem to like the colonists, and I must say
that was not expected."
Esganikan flicked her plume of hair and faced into the
wind. She seemed to enjoy being in the open air: it might have been a
relief after a long enclosed patrol.
"They want an Earth that lives in balance, and so do
we," she said. "And that is why we will take them with us when we send
a mission to Earth. They have asked for our help. So we will give it."
We have released
the command codes for EFS Thetis so that
you can take control of the vessel and retrieve your personnel. The
ship is equipped to take up to 400 individuals in chill-sleep and we
will order evacuation of all FEU personnel from Umeh Station. We hope
cooperation can be resumed when the difficulties over Bezer'ej have
been resolved. In the meantime, we ask you to maintain an open
communications relay between our systems. We genuinely seek peaceful
relations with Umeh.
BIRSEN
ERTEGUN,
Foreign Secretary, FEU
Someone hit her. She couldn't tell who it
was but she threw a punch back anyway. And someone was screaming: a
woman's voice, shrill and sobbing, "Don't! Don't! Leave him alone, you
pig--"
Shan woke with a start and expected--oh no oh no oh no--to
see black, star-speckled space once
again.
Instead she was looking up at gathering clouds in a
fading blue sky. She rolled over onto her side and realized she had
dozed off on the terrace at the back of the house.
Shapakti stood at a careful distance. "I knocked," he
said apologetically. He rapped on the parapet wall, not making much of
a sound at all. "It was hard to find something to knock on."
"Nobody else in?"
"No Aras, no Ade."
Well, at least the two of them weren't worrying about
her any longer. She didn't like people fussing. It was six days since
Nevyan had brought her back and she was mobile and conscious and she
could take care of herself. As long as she didn't look at her body in
the shower, she was fine. A week, maybe two, and then she'd look a
little more like a survivor than a victim.
And then Aras might remember she was his wife, and all
that went with that. He was treating her like his child.
Shapakti waited patiently. "I came to ask if you wanted
to visit Bezer'ej."
"Yes, it's time I took a look."
"I know these things concern you. You were an
environment officer."
"I was a police officer. I
joined EnHaz late and I didn't do the science bit. I used to nick
people for pollution, breaching research guidelines, illegal
biomaterials, that sort of thing. Do you understand nick?
Arrest. Prosecute. Punish." Punishment
hadn't been part of her job since she was a uniformed officer on the
street, but she did it anyway. Sometimes the informal approach worked
best. Sometimes she was so informal that she'd let eco-terrorists do
the job for her. "And I'm still a police officer. I don't know how to
be anything else."
Shapakti made a cautious circle around her to get to
the doorway. "We have started to cleanse Ouzhari. A crew has landed to
carry out a survey."
Shan picked up the blankets and folded them, finding
herself suddenly in the mood for a large plate of something. She didn't
care what. She was ravenous.
"What do you actually do, Shapakti?" she asked.
"I am a scientist," he said. "I study how organisms
work."
"Ah, a biologist. Is that why you hang around me? Study
the old freak?"
"Do you find my interest offensive?"
"I'd rather you just asked me questions."
"I want to know about c'naatat.
We all do."
"You're looking at it."
"How does it make its decisions?"
"I think it treats a host like a planet. An ecosystem."
She had to use the English word: she had no wess'u for it. "Except it
takes a lot better care of it than gethes
would."
"Can you feel it?"
"No. I can feel what it does, but I'm not conscious of
it as an entity. Or a community." She had a sudden irrelevant thought.
There was no God, but if there had been one, maybe that was how he
operated too. He let humans fuck up because he was too big and too busy
to see the piddling small detail. "I try not to think of being
colonized."
She looked at her hands and there was more tissue
between the skin and the bone than there was yesterday. C'naatat
had preserved her brain, even if it had
to devour all her muscles and her fat to do so. Then it put back enough
tissue to make her mobile, to get her away from any threat. And then it
began bringing her back to normal levels of organ tissue and lean
muscle mass. If it wasn't smart and sentient, then it was doing a good
impersonation of it.
She flexed her hand in front of Shapakti, sending a
ripple of colored lights up through her fingers. He made a small
incoherent sound. It was a great party trick.
"I picked it up from the bezeri somehow," she said. "This might be
the last living trace of them. Ironic. You know they
made maps? Colored sand pressed between sheets of transparent shell.
Beautiful."
"We look for survivors anyway."
Shapakti moved back for every inch Shan moved forward,
and that wasn't like wess'har, who didn't know what too close
meant. "You think I'm dangerous, like
Esganikan does?"
"C'naatat needs to be
controlled."
"No, those who might misuse it need to be controlled.
Understand the difference?"
"Yes."
"Tell me, are gethes the
only species that behaves this badly towards others?"
Shapakti tipped his head slowly to the right. "No. But
you sound as if you would want them to be."
It was a sharp observation. Yes, she hated her own
kind. She knew that. She was the polar opposite of most humans, who
thought that Homo sapiens alone was
special: and she thought they were the only ones who were not.
She was going to ask Shapakti how he had
spotted that so soon, but she decided to leave it.
"You were going to teach me eqbas'u," she said.
"Humans learn language slowly."
"Tell you what, give me a shot of Eqbas blood or
something and see what happens."
Shapakti's pupils snapped open and shut in utterly
transparent curiosity. Shan was reminded what poor poker players
wess'har would make.
"I just meant blood," she said. "That wasn't a
euphemism."
"What's euphemism?"
"An indirect and less offensive way of saying
something. Don't think I'm offering you anything extra, okay?"
Shapakti thought about it. She could see it on his
face. There was a definite wess'har expression when they were realizing
something, a slow lowering of the head like a small animal gradually
nodding off to sleep.
"I have an isan at home,"
he said stiffly.
"Good for you, son. So you take a few drugs and you
don't need oursan, right?"
"Correct."
"That explains Esganikan's surly manner." One wess'har
word for surly was ussi'har, ussissi
behavior. "She didn't bring her jurej've
with her."
"She has none. She is a soldier. It would not be fair
to have family." He edged to the door. "I will come for you tomorrow."
Shapakti left, wafting sandalwood, and Shan stood
looking into the cupboard-sized bedroom she'd shared with Aras. It was
high time she moved back into it. Besides, Ade was confined to the sofa
as long as she was using his bed.
She had no idea why she was put there. She wondered if
it was Aras's choice.
"Sod it," she said. "That's my
bed too."
She dragged the dhren
offAde's bed. Beneath the piles of sek
fabric it was just a few broad planks of efte
wood laid on blocks. Efte grew on
Bezer'ej, fast-maturing tree-sized plants that shot to full height in a
few months and then deliquesced and drained back into the soil, leaving
behind sheets of fibrous bark that could be cut, felted, laminated, and
made into a hundred different materials. For the first time she
wondered if the wess'har had introduced it to Wess'ej. There was still
a great deal about their approach to ecology that she didn't know. But
it could wait.
What mattered at the moment was getting fit again and
trying to recover that state of relative contentment she'd reached with
Aras. For a make-do-and-mend relationship, it had been pretty good;
there was a lot to be said for necessity. She made up their bed again,
holding the sheets of fabric under the cold torrent of the shower spout
to wash them, and shook them dry.
Ade, ever the ultra-tidy soldier, had folded his
bedding neatly and stowed it in the single cupboard. It was just a
couple of camouflage sheets of thin DPM fabric, the sort you could fold
down in your pack and even use to make a bivouac shelter in the field.
Shan recreated his bed as best she could by wrapping the sek
blankets around the planks and finally
stretching the sheet drum-tight with proper military envelope corners.
She didn't have a coin to perform the old army test for
bed-making perfection, so she took a cube of brick-solid dried evem
from the larder and bounced it down hard on
the covers. It sprang back into her hand. She hoped Ade appreciated the
attention to detail.
Aras and Ade returned an hour later, muddy from working
the allotment and carrying sacks of vegetables. They seemed easy in
each other's company for the moment.
I never thought I'd see either
of them again.
Shan wondered why relief was so short-lived. When you
were in a terrible situation, you imagined that you would live in a
state of permanent gratitude if you ever escaped. You would never ask
for anything again, anything, ever, as
long as you could extract yourself from the shit you were in. You would
cherish all those things snatched from you and never let them out of
your sight again. But it wasn't like that. A sense of gratitude was
more fleeting than resentment.
Ade glanced at the open door of his room and went to
check.
"You've been a naughty girl, Boss," he said. "You
should leave the housework to us."
"I was bored," she lied. "Anyway, you can bounce a coin
off that bed."
"I noticed. Tidy job. Thanks."
She studied Ade's expression--cautious, anxious for
approval--and recalled the dreamed memory that she had been grappling
with when Shapakti disturbed her. It hadn't come from Aras. The vivid
tableau of violence had been conducted in English, a woman yelling at
someone to stop. She could guess a lot from that: it was Ade's memory.
For a moment she recalled something warm and wet on her
face like a spray of saliva, and she put her hand up instinctively to
swat it away. Then she felt her stomach roll with nausea.
Whatever that memory was, it wasn't good. And it wasn't
saliva, because she'd been spat at too often to mistake it for anything
else.
"I'm going to Bezer'ej for a recce," she said.
"We'll--" Aras began, but Shan interrupted him.
"On my own. I'll be fine."
"You won't like what you see."
"Funny, that's happened quite a few times in my career."
Ade rinsed his hands and made a grab for his jacket. "I've got to
sort out some billets for the lads," he said. His glance
darted between them. "Please, don't have a row about this, will you?"
Shan shrugged. "Of course not."
The soul of tact, Ade Bennett. He gave both of them an
uncomfortable smile and left. Silence flooded in after him.
"Want to say something?" she asked.
Aras was now accomplished at displacement activity. He
rummaged through the larder. "No, but you do, isan."
"I moved my stuff back into our bedroom. Are you okay
with that?"
"Yes."
"No problems sharing a bed with me again?"
"You're offended that I haven't attempted to copulate."
Sometimes the no-nonsense wess'har style wasn't what
she needed to hear. "Okay, I know I don't look too good right now."
"You're still frail. It's not appropriate for your
condition. I must care for you."
"I thought that we'd be relieved to be together again."
No, I don't need anyone. I really don't, remember?
"I just didn't think it would be this uncomfortable."
"These are early days. I thought you were dead. It's
hard for me to adjust too."
"You blame Ade."
"But you're back."
"And you're okay with him?"
"You spaced yourself."
"Exactly. It was my own bloody fault. I didn't have to
go after Lin and I was so cock-sure of myself that I didn't think
anyone could take me." The memory she had picked up from Ade's blood
was one of being violently abused. She wondered what she had triggered
in him when she lashed out at him, and she now knew why she felt
ashamed. "As long as you don't take it out on him."
Aras tilted his head slightly. "He's my brother. In
most senses."
Shan wrapped her arms round his waist and rested her
forehead against his chin. Theirs was an accidental relationship, a
blend of duty and sympathy, the sort that was based on pragmatism
rather than impulse; it was the sort she could trust. "I know this is
hard for you too."
"I wanted to use the grenade. Eddie and Ade stopped me."
"Oh, Christ, I'm sorry."
"It's in the past."
"Well, we're both going to find out what we went
through, aren't we? Swap-a-nightmare time." Oursan
was fun but c'naatat transferred memories
across the receptor cells too, the vivid ones that you couldn't erase.
"I think I've picked up some bad ones from Ade just from blood contact."
"I imagine a soldier with a violent father has some
very unpleasant memories."
Shan had never known Ade's background, but nobody who
fitted into normal family life would have signed up for a deployment
like this. She felt the punch again. She wondered what the splash of
warm moisture on her face might be and dreaded the revelation.
"You always got on before," Shan said.
"Will you prefer him to me?"
She jerked her head back. "Whoa, where did that come
from?"
"You felt pity and comradeship for me and you feel the
same for him."
"Hey, I'm not a bloody charity shop."
"If that's what you want, I'd be very happy to have him
as a house-brother. But perhaps human monogamy will make you choose
between us."
"Don't talk crap," she said. "We had a deal. I don't
walk out on a deal. And I'm not Lindsay Neville. I don't fuck someone
by accident or because I got tanked up out of my skull either, okay?
Don't you know me by now?"
"You said it yourself. You ruined Ade's life. I know
how your framework of responsibility operates, and I will respect your
decisions, whatever they are."
"You know what? If I had the energy, I'd storm out, but
frankly I can't be arsed." She stepped back from him, hands held up in
angry submission. "When I'm feeling fit, maybe I'll handle this better."
It was time for a walk. Her anger had been an asset in
her career, a savage dog let off the leash when she chose to free it
and send people running for safety. It had kept her sane in space. But
now her anger wouldn't come to heel. She didn't like being in thrall to
any emotion and that included passion.
She walked through the city feeling like a copper on
the beat again, a memory from a long and uncomplicated time ago,
acknowledging wess'har she recognized and those she didn't. This wasn't
Reading Metro. They didn't wrap themselves in defensive anonymity here.
And, like a copper, she knew that Ade had been lying--benignly--and
that
he wasn't sorting out billets for his detachment.
She'd find him. F'nar was compact enough to cover in a
few hours and it wasn't a place to hide, so she'd start with known
associates and affiliations--Nevyan's place--and work out from there.
Like Eddie, she could always find out what she needed to know.
In a world where there were few secrets to uncover, she
wondered what skills she might have to learn to occupy herself in the
very long future.
Eddie took a deep breath. He was afraid what he
would see.
"Okay, kid." He brushed his palm across the top of
Giyadas's rocking-horse mane. She had a skill he needed: she could
press the correct sequences into the ITX console simultaneously, while
he had to tap through them in laborious sequence to activate the image
in Nevyan's wall. "Let's see what's on the news, eh?"
"It will be depressing," said Giyadas.
Eddie heard his own phrases in her mouth. She was six
as far as he was concerned. Six-year-olds--even matriarchs in
waiting--deserved a carefree childhood, protected from concepts like
depressing news. But it didn't appear to dent her mood.
There were only two news feeds he could access via the
ITX now, and both were running similar images. They hadn't changed much
in three days. Apart from the sports and entertainment segments, they
spewed wall-to-wall unedited footage of troop movements along the FEU
borders with Africa and the Sinostates.
Eddie could hear the voice-over but he didn't want to.Unless the
FEU agrees to stand down and hand over
control of the ITX link to the UN so that global negotiation can take
place, the African Alliance is threatening to seize the FEU downlink
array at Amman. Sinostates president Yi says she will deploy troops to
ensure that the relay station is handed over to the UN undamaged.
The Amman relay was sandwiched on a finger of land
between the two superpowers. The Middle East had never been very good
at staying out of the crucible. Eddie exhaled and thought better of
sending 'Desk the images of Eqbas-held worlds that Ual had given him.
He'd abandoned all the rules of the game.
Self-censorship didn't matter any more.
"Why are they doing this?" asked Giyadas.
"So the other nations can talk to your mother and
Esganikan and…well, agree some kind of peace." Eddie rolled the words
around in his brain and they left him reeling. "If this has UN backing
then the FEU has to give in."
Giyadas appeared to be mesmerized by the sudden switch
to the studio. She tilted her head about as far as it would go,
studying the faces and prodding the console to switch between story
icons.
"There can be no negotiation," she said. "Why do they
think talking will change what must be done?"
There was no point panicking over the political
commentary of a child. But Eddie did, because this child thought as the
adult wess'har did, and the adult wess'har of two worlds had clearly
made up their minds that Earth was due for a visit.
"Can you get me my news desk now, sweetheart?"
Giyadas looked over her shoulder at him. "Is this just
pictures, Eddie?"
He didn't understand her question at first. He heard a
journalist's question; were there any interviews to follow? But then he
realized she was asking him something more profound. "For me, you mean?"
"Yes. What is real to you? Do you see your home at war?
Or do you see a clever film, something that makes you feel
accomplished?"
Shan had once asked him a similar question about Earth;
did the people back home see his reports on the war in the Cavanagh
system as a movie, massively distant and unreal?
It wasn't unreal now. And it was still at least
twenty-five years before they would see the unimaginable reality of an
Eqbas task force.
"I think I see a product," he said. "And that tells me
I need to stop doing this job."
He sat on the thin hard bench and stared at the
shimmering wall with its armored vehicles full of bots and an earnest
young major in a Sinostates uniform explaining that every effort would
be made to minimize collateral damage. Troops with a universal
expression that Eddie had seen on Ade's face and a hundred
others--wide-eyed, unblinking, brows slightly raised--stared from the
back of trucks.
"Okay, I've seen enough," he said. "Let's talk to 'Desk."
Giyadas played the console like a concert pianist. The
wall defaulted to smooth stone for a moment and then back to the news.
"I can't find your 'Desk."
He could see the transmission: the ITX was still live. "Let me have
a go."
Giyadas had a way of lowering her voice as if she was
talking to an idiot. "It's not there," she said. "The link has gone."
Eddie didn't disbelieve her, but he stood behind her
anyway and laid his hand on hers--cool, suede-like, utterly alien--to
move it to the controls he felt might yield a connection.
"See?" said Giyadas. "I am no fool."
The wall was flooded with an inappropriately peaceful
powder-blue holding screen. It simply said UN
PORTAL in the global and two subglobal languages--English
flanked
by Mandarin and Arabic.
The FEU had caved in, with or without armed conflict.
Eddie wondered what live footage he had not
seen.
Either way, he was now cut off again from BBChan, the
last remnant of what he called home.
We will return you to Jejeno," said Esganikan,
in passable English. "You may need protection from your fellows. Our
troops will accompany you."
Ual hadn't quite planned it this way. Ralassi seemed
not to be taking any notice and trotted around the ship's compartment,
examining the bulkhead displays with an Eqbas ussissi. Ual's fate
didn't affect them. Ussissi were beyond sectarian disputes.
"But it's unthinkable for any
wess'har troops to land on Umeh," he said.
"Then think it."
It was hard to tell if she was massively arrogant or
just finding her way through a complex and inexact alien language. She
was a big creature and she intimidated him. She knelt on a thick pad of
fabric, leaning forward slightly from the waist like a ussissi about to
spring.
"There will be a bad reaction," said Ual.
"If we don't land we can't help you. So we land and
help or we take you back and leave you. Either way, there will be no
further colonization of other planets by your people."
Know the enemy. There
were unspoken assumptions about other species that shaped the isenj
view of the world. Wess'har believed in balance and would not take
life. Humans wanted something in exchange for anything they gave, and
they wanted it fast, and they usually wanted more than was fair.
Ussissi cooperated with everyone but drew the line at choosing sides.
And nobody wanted to die.
Ual had not fully understood the Eqbas capacity for
taking you at your word and then refusing to deviate from their plans. I
asked them to help. Eddie had once told him a
human myth about having three wishes, and how careful you had to be
about the way you worded your wish.
"What form might your help take?" Ual asked.
Esganikan had that wess'har trait of suddenly becoming
absolutely still, not just immobile but frozen.
"You have problems feeding an increasing population and dealing with
the pollution caused by that. The first step is to reverse your
population growth." She dipped her head suddenly, the great plume of
red fur catching the light. "Normally we would begin reestablishing a
sustainable balance between species in the ecosystem, but as you appear
to have eradicated everything beyond food plants and marine life then
that presents us with problems. There is little to restore. Do you
maintain any genetic archive, like the gethes
do?"
"No."
"A pity."
"But Tasir Var is not entirely… urbanized."
"Your moon."
"Have you observed it?"
"We still assess Umeh from orbit. We will break a
vessel out to there soon."
Ual pondered break. Eddie
said the Eqbas ships split into sections. "You could take the remaining
native species from Tasir Var."
"Not an ideal solution, but at the moment I can think
of no other. Da Shapakti is the expert. His priority must be Bezer'ej."
If Esganikan knew it was called Asht then she was
refusing to use the isenj name. Ual accepted that Asht was now beyond
isenj reach; and he always had, even though his colleagues and the
electorate thought otherwise. Sometimes you needed to trade pride and
dreams for a safer reality.
Two Eqbas males entered the compartment and called up
wonderfully detailed images of Umeh's topography in the bulkhead. It
seemed as if the hull of the ship was a liquid sheet full of light.
"Do you have any means to limit your birthrate?" asked
Esganikan.
"Yes, but regions are reluctant to use it in case their
neighbors don't and they are overrun. We have never fully developed
such… unpopular medicine."
"Then we will create a solution that acts on all isenj
equally at the same time."
Ual hesitated. "What?"
"A medication. An intervention."
"But how will you ensure that all use it?"
Esganikan stood up and passed her hands across the
surface of the bulkhead, creating a closer view of Ebj, the Northern
Assembly territory. She put a long multijointed finger on a fine
tracery of lines.
"Is this part of the water grid?"
"Yes."
"Does every Umeh region have such a network?"
Ual began to see the Eqbas mind at work. "I would say
that twenty such grids serve ninety percent of the population."
"And the remainder?"
"They exist on more remote islands and have their own
extraction and pumping systems." Umeh was a world in precarious and
shifting equilibrium: discomfort was spread fairly, a necessary thing
in a crowded world that needed to defuse tension to maintain order.
"You plan to…intervene in the water supply, then?"
"It is the least drastic solution and the most
universal. You must all consume water."
"So you want me to show you how to access the regional
systems."
"All of them."
"Even Ebj?"
"As I said, we will treat all equally. We wish to be
fair, and your internal politics are not our concern." She cocked her
head. She seemed to be searching his face. "We have your DNA. Are all
isenj similar? If not, we shall need more tissue specimens."
Ual heard his beads rattle in an involuntary reflex of
quill fluffing. My tissue. My DNA. But he
concentrated on his duty. "I have not agreed to this."
"We will do it anyway." Esganikan dismissed the images
in the bulkhead with an imperial wave reminiscent of a human's. "The
alternative is culling, and that is an extreme measure, but we can do
that too, and easily, as there are few other life-forms to consider."
She glanced at Ual as if expecting a reply: she had odd shiny eyes like
a human, too, and the same flat featureless skin. "You don't want us to
cull."
Ual had to remind himself she was absolutely literal.
This wasn't one of Eddie's verbal games.
"No, but I believe your claim that you will do it if we
don't comply."
It was Eddie.
If Eddie had actively handed over that quill to create
the bioweapon or had done so from accident or innocence, the result was
the same. Asht--Bezer'ej was now out of isenj reach, and he was
secretly
glad of the removal of one more temptation to overstretch their
capacity. But he wasn't wess'har. He did
care about motive.
I rarely trust anyone.
But he was inexplicably hurt that Eddie might have done something behind
his back, to use the human phrase.
Esganikan did that rapid head-tilting gesture, side to
side, pupils dilating and closing into thin crossed lines.
"You misunderstand us," she said. "As long as you
remain on your own world and harm no other species in it, your problems
are yours to resolve. When you step beyond that line, they are ours."
Her English was getting better by the minute. "But your colonizing
missions are over. And they are over for the gethes,
too. You will both learn to live in balance within your own boundaries."
Ual reached down and snapped off a quill from among the
older ones by his legs, the ones set to shed soon. He took off the
corundum bead and handed the quill to Esganikan. This had to be a
conscious act, not a betrayal.
"If you need more," said Ual, "you may simply ask."
In his mesh of fingers, the bead glinted with blue
light. He would give it to Eddie. He left the Eqbas ship and prepared
to send a message to his mate.
The community of
Constantine colony wishes to return to Earth.
We will remove them from Wess'ej by your year of 2381 and
transport them to a location of their choosing
on your homeworld during your year 2406. We will also grant their
request of aid to re-establish the species contained in the Constantine
gene bank in their proper habitat.
This will mean
some rearrangement on your part. The transition will be easier if your
planet's administrations use the interim period to prepare for a
radical restoration of your ecosphere. Do not attempt to hinder this
operation. It is for the good of all species with a stake in your
planet. It will be carried out.
MATRIARCH
CURAS TI
to the UN Secretary General,
on behalf of the joint administrations of Eqbas Vorhi
"Holy shit," said Eddie. He inhaled a
chunk of dehydrated wheat sprouts and coughed until his eyes watered.
"Coming, ready or not."
He read the transcript of the Eqbas ultimatum several
times over breakfast in Nevyan's main room. The ITX link to 'Desk had
been down for ten hours. But he could still see the outgoing news feed,
and it reminded him that over the years he had slipped story by story,
interview by interview, into the position he was occupying now. He had
always been a tool for politicians, mostly knowingly, sometimes not.
The Eqbas statement wasn't an ultimatum. That implied
the unless factor. And there wasn't any unless about
it. Coming, ready or not…
Lisik was trilling tunelessly while he boiled a pan of
something red and slimy. Its fumes made Eddie's nose prickle. Giyadas
occupied herself in playing with Eddie's handheld, now retrieved from
Esganikan and with an ITX link to Earth built into it, courtesy of
Livaor. Nevyan seemed to have inherited a stable of impressively
capable males.
Serrimissani watched them all, turning her head sharply
from one to the other, as much the embodiment of a meerkat on guard
duty as he had ever seen. And this was a regular day. Invasion.
Breakfast with aliens. The end of my career.
Eddie had the recurring experience of standing outside
his own body and observing his extraordinary position; faced with
overwhelming novelty, his brain sought a familiar pattern and settled
on breakfast to buffer the experience. It was the split second when the
cinematic image of war in your viewfinder suddenly became personal and
aimed at you and you ran for it.
"What did you expect?" asked Serrimissani.
"More saber-rattling," said Eddie. "You'd have thought
I'd have learned the wess'har style by now, wouldn't you?"
"Two years is ample time to do so."
She came and went as she pleased in Nevyan's household,
disappearing most nights to return to the ussissi warren with its
little half-buried mud-plaster eggshell domes. Eddie could now see that
the Constantine colony on Bezer'ej had been built to a mix of two
architectural styles, the discreetly buried galleries of northern
Wess'ej and the domes of ussissi nests. He was fascinated by the
symbiotic evolution of two burrowing species, but his fascination had
to take a backseat.
Earth was going to get a personal visit from Eqbas
Vorhi.
It would happen in thirty years' time, but it was going
to happen and nothing was going to prevent it. The Eqbas had the same
literal finality as their clean-living Wess'ej cousins.
"I can't complain that I haven't had the best
exclusives in history," he said. He heard his own feeble reassurance.
"I mean, who else could run alien invasion stories live from the front?"
Serrimissani did her fox yawn, the little whining noise
followed by a snap of jaws. "I understand many of your colleagues have
tried over the years."
"I mean serious journalists with genuine stories."
"And you haven't transmitted any material about
Frankland's return."
"Okay." He hadn't a clue what to say about Shan, even
if he intended to run the story, which he didn't. He'd done enough
damage as it was. "I've succumbed to self-censorship again. Let's say
I've grown up."
Giyadas sat beside him and peered into the bowl. Then
she placed his handheld and screen in front of him.
"I spoke to a gethes at
the United Nations. She was alarmed."
Eddie's stomach somersaulted. He had no idea the link
was being answered. The kid hadn't said a word about it. Jesus, she'd
spoken to someone on Earth. "Sweetheart, did you say anything to scare
her?"
"I told her who I was and I asked which gethes
nations would live like wess'har and
which would not."
It was a reasonable question for the miniature adult
that Giyadas was. But if that call had gone straight through to the UN
shortly after the warning from Esganikan had been received, then it
might have sounded like a very different enquiry. It might have sounded
like who's going to be on our side and who isn't.
"What did she say?" asked Eddie.
"She said she would get someone senior
to speak to me."
He prodded the handheld with a cautious finger and
reopened the link. The image that appeared was an office with ornate
translucent furniture as if someone had decided to do the rococo look
in ice sculpture. Cherry blossoms were suspended within the back of the
glass-clear empty chair that occupied the shot. In the way of all small
incongruous detail, the pink petals seized his attention.
Then the chair was suddenly occupied, and a middle-aged
woman in a high-necked taupe suit gave a visible breath of relief.
"I'm Eddie Michallat, BBChan," said Eddie. "I was
hoping to speak to my news desk. What happened to the FEU Defense
Ministry portal?"
"Transmissions are being routed through the United
Nations now," said the woman. An ID icon sat at the bottom of the
frame: YULYA CORT, CRISIS LIAISON. With
a job title like that, Eddie thought, she was probably a light sleeper.
"May I ask who was using your link?"
"Giyadas…" He struggled for the wess'har naming
convention. "Giyadas Lisik Nevyan. I'm sorry about that. She's a little
girl. So you have control of outgoing ITX now?"
"Access is being allocated at the moment."
"A queue to use the phone, eh?"
"Sorry?"
"Old phrase. Doesn't matter." He gave her a pause to
talk but she didn't take it. He wasn't even asking her a question so he
made a mental note that she might prove difficult. "Would you mind
patching me through to BBChan Europe, please?"
"This is a relay for international community use. If we
open it up to the entertainment industry, it would become unmanageable."
No, doll. That's not the way
it's done, believe me.
Eddie rarely demanded what he could ask for as a favor,
but he felt it was time she understood his connections. "I'm not the
entertainment industry, as you call it. I'm a BBChan journalist. Now, I
could always ask this kid's mother to ask
you. Would that be easier? I'm her guest, along with the Eqbas Vorhi
advance fleet."
Cort appeared to think about it for a while; then her
right arm moved out of frame.
"I'll see what I can do," she said. The screen faded
out to the baby blue UN holding portal.
"What is it?" said Giyadas.
"Nothing," said Eddie. He was annoyed that he hadn't
been connected, but he had Ual, Nevyan and now Esganikan to exercise a
little influence for him. He'd wait. "Bloody jobsworth."
"She doesn't know how important you are." From anyone
else it would have been taking the piss. From Giyadas, it was a sincere
assessment. "You are one of us."
Serrimissani made a small ssss
that probably translated exactly the way it sounded.
Reporters weren't supposed to be important or one of anybody.
It was the final proof, if he needed
it, that he'd gone too far. He went back to his bowl of wheat sprouts,
reassuring himself that the meager supply of grain was far more
nutritious in this state, and suddenly realized the only person who
cared about him was an alien kid.
It had never hit him that hard before. Next week, next
month, next year, something would change and he would stop crashing
through bad and half-hearted relationships. But he never had: that was
why he was here, like the rest of them. He was someone with so few
emotional anchors on Earth that he could wrench himself out of time to
travel twenty-five light-years from home.
Even Shan Frankland--aloof and hard as a whore's
heart--had stumbled into communal domesticity. That told him just how
alone he truly was. Even Shan could get her leg over here.
He crunched thoughtfully.
"Will you return with the colony?" asked Serrimissani.
He hadn't even considered it. The news was happening here.
If he did, he would want to return to the
Cavanagh system because this was the most fascinating place he had ever
been and--the kid had hit the nail on the head--he was important
here. He couldn't bear the idea of all
this going on without being involved in it.
And by the time he got out of the freezer, everyone he
left behind here would be at least fifty years older. He didn't fit in
anywhere any more. He probably never would.
"I might stick around."
"Ual is returning to Umeh."
"He's a braver man than I am, Gunga Din."
Serrimissani didn't ask the obvious question and
continued undistracted. "He will have Eqbas to protect him."
"How? They've got a few thousand personnel, tops."
"Attack an Eqbas and see what retribution follows."
"How come everyone knows so much about them except the
wess'har here?"
"They don't want to know."
"But how can they avoid
knowing what they get up to?" Eddie had no concept of not wanting to
know something, nor any idea of how a technically advanced species got
to be that way without indiscriminate curiosity. He fumbled in his
pocket and pulled out the drab gray isenj data-player with the cube
still in it. "Have you seen this shit? Do
you know what the Eqbas have done to planets who've got out of line
over the years?"
"Broadly speaking, yes. We too come from Eqbas Vorhi."
"And? Is this okay?"
"Is it any different to what your powerful nations did
to those they could subdue and press into their mold, except that Eqbas
Vorhi is interplanetary in its reach?"
"No, but wess'har are supposed to be morally superior."
"So if a large human attacks a small human and causes
it suffering, then it is morally superior
to ignore their plight? And what if the attack was unprovoked?"
Eddie hated arguing ethics with her. He usually lost.
He was being sucked into an indefensible position: damn, that was his
job. "Define provocation."
"Do you tolerate cultural differences on Earth?"
"Yes."
"Even ones like stoning females to death for being
raped."
Serrimissani had done her homework. Eddie was more
convinced than ever that she was a natural journalist.
"That's an extreme example, doll. There are clearly
things that are unacceptable, and things that--"
"Clarity for you,
perhaps," she said, and her tone was very neutral, not at all her usual
hissing contempt. "Understand that we have
clear lines of acceptability too. At what point do you intervene? Where
is the line between cultural difference and unacceptable behavior? I
imagine your more barbaric communities feel their actions are
acceptable, just as you feel yours are."
Eddie unpacked the sentence and decided that was
exactly what it was: a sentence, but in the legal sense.
"Okay, you win. We're a species of verminous fucktards.
I still don't understand why the wess'har here can be so un-curious and
still have science and technology."
"Eddie, humans seem to have difficulty accepting that
others do not think as they do. Nor do they seem to want to try. That
shows a singular lack of curiosity in itself."
No, wess'har didn't think like humans. Eddie conceded
defeat and returned to his wheat sprouts.
"That was enjoyable," said Giyadas. "What may we debate
now?"
On the surface, wess'har behaved very much like humans.
Eddie watched Lisik drain the red slime and pack it into exquisite
scarlet glass jars that looked almost liquid in themselves, just like
anyone pickling produce for the winter. Cidemnet, another of the four
males that Nevyan had taken in when their own isan
died, walked in and checked flat trays of a white sponge sheet that
appeared to be drying on the planklike range. It was a peaceful scene
of domesticity.
Cidemnet prodded the sponge sheets with a stick of
brilliant amber glass and seemed satisfied. He broke some off into a
bowl and held it out to Eddie. "You try?" he said. Livaor, rinsing
fabric in a bowl of water, paused to watch the show.
Eddie dabbed the sponge with a cautious finger and
tasted it. It wasn't just pepper-hot: it was sour and musty and it
actually hurt.
"Cidemnet makes very good rov'la,"
said Giyadas, and took half the portion.
"I can tell," said Eddie hoarsely.
Cidemnet was also pretty useful with a fighter craft.
He had flown only one mission in his life and that had ended with CSV Actaeon
breaking up in orbit around Umeh and its
shattered hull giving Jejeno a spectacular meteor display. Eddie smiled
with all the will he could muster and chewed a small chunk of searing,
choking, foul rov'la.
No, they weren't like humans at all.
Ade was sitting on an outcrop at the top of the
bluff, collar turned up against the wind, rifle and Bergen on his back,
swinging his legs idly like a heavily armed schoolboy. Rain had started
to fall, making the day feel colder than it was.
"Who told you where I was?" he said.
"I can still follow a suspect." Shan's legs screamed
for a rest. She sat down beside him. "Nevyan said you had a little
bolt-hole up here."
"You shouldn't be out in this weather."
"Don't be so bloody daft." She held her hand out to
him, more of a hand-it-over gesture than a tender one. He hesitated and
didn't take it. "Get your arse back home and let's not have any more of
this crap." She wanted to tell him that he was a kind, brave and very
appealing bloke, and that she was pathetically grateful for his
devotion, but it didn't come out quite like that. "Come on, move it."
"I'm in the way, aren't I?"
"You come home right now. We'll work it out."
"I bet you said things like that when you were talking
someone down from a window ledge."
"No, I used to say, �Jump, you pathetic fucker, and
stop holding up the traffic.' "
Ade laughed. It was true but maybe he didn't realize
that; he seemed to think that she was wonderful, noble, heroic. She
wasn't. She didn't care about the rest of the human race. She cared
about him, and maybe she cared about Eddie at a pinch, but not in quite
the same way.
"So that's it, is it?" Shan looked down at the cairn.
The stones were all neatly graduated, big ones at the bottom,
decreasing in size as they went up. He'd put a lot of effort into it.
"Did many people turn up? Did they say nice things about me and talk
about my tireless work for charity?"
Ade sat with arms folded, chin down and eyes lowered,
and didn't answer.
"Sorry," she said. "I tend to forget that it's more
traumatic for the mourners than it is for the corpse."
Shan got up and gave him a few moments while she busied
herself studying the cairn's construction. There was something lodged
deep in the stones, a piece of fabric and metal. She worked her fingers
carefully into the gap to pull it out, realizing too late that it was a
singularly tactless act.
"Jesus, Ade." She spread the medals in her palm and let
the ribbons drape over the edge of her hand. Turkey, Macedonia, North
Africa; and the ACG and the Military Star. She had no idea that he'd
been decorated twice for bravery, but it didn't surprise her. It also
didn't surprise her that he'd never mentioned it. "I bet you didn't get
these free with your breakfast cereal."
Predictably, he blushed. It was one of those odd
contrasts with his roughy-toughy marine image that she found deeply
endearing. "Yeah, well…"
"If you brought them all this way then they must mean a
lot to you. It was a lovely gesture."
Just sometimes--and with less frequency over the
years--someone could get past her defenses. Ade did it all too
frequently for her peace of mind. He didn't look up but there was a
distinct citrus-tinged whiff of a wess'har male under stress. She
folded the ribbons round the medals, unfastened his battledress and
slipped them into the top pocket of his shirt.
"Sod 'em, Ade. Sod them all. They can't take it away
from you." She slid her warrant card out of the swiss. She still had a
real card: she always refused implanted technology. "And we have to be
more than badges."
She shoved the card between the stones. Superintendent
Frankland was gone, and she had to get used to being Shan, the person
she'd been cooped up with in open space when she couldn't move or
breathe or die.
Ade raised his eyebrows. "Like that's going to change
you one bit."
And that was another thing they had in common. It was
more than her healthy interest in his fit body and his charming
awkwardness. They had both found something of a genuine family in their
respective uniforms, and then politicians had taken that from them.
There was a sense of shared betrayal.
They took the easy way down from the bluff. It was a
tense walk back home and she struggled to make conversation.
"What was Ouzhari like when you were last there?"
Ade shrugged. "Bloody horrific."
"Oh."
"Yeah."
"Right…"
Ade walked on a few more strides and then sighed. "I
really thought that when you came back I'd stop feeling so bad about
things, but I haven't."
"For chrissakes, Ade, let it go."
"I'm trying."
"I fucked up your life with c'naatat.
We're even."
"My life was fucked long before you nutted me."
"Your dad?"
"Yeah, the shit-house."
"I think I've picked up your memory of him."
"Handy with his fists. He'd have a go at me and my
brother and my mum too, except she normally fought back and took a good
hiding for us when he was really tanked up. And I did sod all to save
her." Ade gave her an awkward nudge, the sort he usually reserved for
Barencoin or Becken. "You're a lot like her."
Ah well. Now she knew the
psychology of his devotion. "I'm sorry I lashed out at you. You don't
need any more violence."
"It's why I find it hard when women need help. I think
that's why I crapped myself when I had to rescue Mesevy."
She'd almost forgotten the incident. Sabine Mesevy,
drowning in the bottomless bog outside Constantine, sinking into slime
populated by transparent sheven that would
engulf you and digest you. Ade had gone in without hesitation. He'd
thrown up and also lost control of his bowels afterwards, but only
afterwards.
"I'd have let her go under," said Shan. "Like it or
not, it was heroic."
"I should have done more for my mum. I was the bloke."
"You were a child and your mother was an adult. She
chose to stay with a violent man." The silly cow,
being that emotionally dependent on a man. "Just drop the guilt.
You've got enough on your plate now without beating yourself up about
the past."
Shan had once thought of Ade as a medium type of man;
mid-build, mid-brown hair, mid-brown eyes, the sort of bloke you
wouldn't notice unless your business was noticing people. But she had
learned he was simply good at avoiding attention, a useful survival
trait in both a brutalized child and a professional soldier. There was
nothing mediocre about him at all. She thought of the time she had very
nearly weakened and succumbed to a quick and unromantic fuck on
Bezer'ej, and she realized she had spotted what he truly was from their
first encounter on board Thetis. He was
courageous, a real man by her exacting definition, and not because he
was fearless but because he knew exactly what fear was.
She tried again. "Are you getting on okay with Aras?"
"He's a pro." It was almost his highest accolade, one
degree short of fucking hero. There was
definitely a precise hierarchy of personal worth, climbing up from the
pits of shit-house through tourist, sound and pro
to heroic status. "A good mate."
"You've got a lot in common. I know that you and Eddie
kept him together. I owe you for that."
"Least I could do."
"You know what the isenj did to him, don't you?"
"He never said exactly." Ade had that look--a
compression of the lips as if stifling profanity and a fixed gaze into
middle distance--that said he didn't need to be told. "C'naatat
filled in the gaps for me."
Shan thought of something warm and gel-like hitting her
cheek. Maybe it wasn't the time to ask. "I keep recalling your being
hit in the face by something wet."
Ade looked blank, gazing ahead of him as he walked, and
then he screwed his eyes shut for a second. "Yeah," he said. He didn't
expand and she didn't press him, so she waited a few moments and
changed the subject.
"We need to talk about the domestic arrangements." She
couldn't bring herself to say it. She had to. "Aras is afraid I'll
prefer you to him."
"Oh." Pebbles crunched under Ade's boots. The S
word had still not intruded in the
conversation. "I didn't think wess'har were jealous."
"Polyandry's natural for them. He's just worried about
being alone again."
Ade nodded, eyes fixed straight ahead. "That's all a
bit exotic for me."
He knew what she meant, then. "Okay, I read you wrong."
Ade swallowed audibly. "No. You didn't."
"Changed your mind?"
"No."
"Okay. When you're up for it, just ask."
Ade slowed to an ambling pace. He was blushing again. "You ever
fallen in love?"
"No. Loved eventually, but never fallen."
"I didn't think so." He walked on.
This was why Shan felt comfortable with wess'har. There
was nothing you could say that sounded gauche or clinical to them. Just
the facts, ma'am: either something was so, or it wasn't, and nobody got
embarrassed. But Ade did.
And so did she. "Sorry. This comes from never having to
beat men off with a shitty stick. I never learned to do this right."
"It's okay. You're just like a bloke, really." He bit
his lip, his face a caricature of instant regret. "I didn't mean it
like that. I meant that I don't have to guess your mood or explain what
my job's like… shit, I'm really fucking this up, aren't I?"
"Yes. You can stop digging that hole now."
He put his hands over his eyes in mock exhaustion. "Jesus, I wish I
was good with words. Please don't laugh at me. I know
I'm not clever."
She dug her nails into her palm to stop a smile
crossing her face because he wouldn't have understood that she found
him touchingly innocent rather than ignorant. "I'm not laughing. And
you're not stupid."
"It was Dave Pharoah."
It was an almost wess'har non sequitur, a sudden leap
from one subject to another just as Aras did. "What was?"
"The splash on your face. Corporal Dave Pharoah. My
oppo. He was a daft sod, Dave. I got my tattoos on a tat run with him
when we were completely hand-carted on rough cider. He bet me I
wouldn't have a tattoo done in a really painful place." Ade managed a
rueful smile. Then it faded. "He got shot standing right next to me at
Ankara and his brains went all over my face. I didn't realize what it
was at first. I thought it was bird shit."
Shan wanted to say she understood but she knew she
didn't. For all the violence in her job, she had gone home at the end
of a shift, selected a menu from the catering service, and cleaned her
9mm. She had never been under fire for days or weeks and she had never
wiped a comrade's brain tissue off her face. When you thought you were well
hard, to use Eddie's phrase, it was always
sobering to realize there was someone who had experienced far worse
things than you had.
She patted his back slowly. "Sorry I brought it up."
"It goes with the job. You know what you're in for when
you sign up."
No, you don't. You couldn't
possibly. "I'm still sorry."
"Anyway, I had the tattoo done and it hurt all right."
Ade kicked a pebble into the air and caught it in one hand, apparently
unaware of how impressive that seemed to her. "If I miss people now,
what's it going to be like when I outlive everyone?"
"I think we'll both find out around the same time,"
said Shan, happy to be counted as one of the boys again.
You've dragged
the rest of the world into this and we're going to have aliens landing
here in thirty years. Plenty of time to come up with a solution? No.
The population is going to panic now, and
they're going to blame us. I'm going to make the Eqbas an offer,
because I'm not entirely convinced that they're the enemy. I think the
enemy is standing right in front of me.
CANH PHO
Prime Minister of the Australasian Republic
in a private conversation with Birsen Ertegun
The island of Ouzhari,
Bezer'ej.
Shan walked along the shoreline of
Ouzhari, suitless and bewildered.
She had never seen the island in its unspoiled state
and maybe that was just as well. Many crime scenes during her career
had made her punching mad, and a few had even reduced her to private
tears, but the scene of desolation notched up a new category: she was
numbed.
Esganikan and Shapakti walked at a discreet distance to
her right, in environment suits that were soft and flowing like
translucent shrouds. She could see them in her peripheral vision. Maybe
it had been a bad idea to forgo the suit, but she didn't need one. It
crossed her mind that it emphasized to the Eqbas that she was a freak
to be controlled at all costs.
She squatted on the sand, elbows braced on her knees
and hands clasped. What did you say? What could you even think? She
tapped her thumbnails against her front teeth, pondering the enormity
of the blast.
"Are you praying?" asked Shapakti.
She could hear him well enough, suit or not. "No. And
if I thought there was a deity listening I wouldn't exactly be praying,
either."
She stood up and walked further along the shore,
stepping carefully over unidentifiable patches of decayed matter that
might once have been bodies. She hadn't even expected bacteria here.
But something had already returned to profit from the carnage.
They're bezeri. They're people.
She was ashamed that she had to remind herself of that,
only feeling the revulsion on an intellectual level rather than an
instinctive one. There were nonhuman animals she reacted to instantly
at a gut level and those that she had to think about. It doesn't
matter. It's what you do, not what you feel
that counts.
Esganikan said little. She kept an eye on the survey
teams, one of them busy carrying out test bores into the soil and the
other on a bizarre floating platform that looked for all the world like
a glass raft. Shan had no idea why it wasn't swamped by the waves. It
had no gunwales that she could see, and large shallow containers didn't
remain stable once they took on a little water and it started slopping
around. But the Eqbas team of four stood calmly on the transparent
platform as if it was solid ground, with their hands clasped against
their chests and looking down at something. As bizarre as it looked, it
was simply the wess'har equivalent of standing with hands on hips, a
comfortably relaxed pose.
Then they all stepped back in one synchronized
movement. A column of dull glass rose from the deck of the raft. For a
moment Shan thought it was part of the steerage or even the head of a
drilling mechanism, but it wasn't. It really was
water, seawater, somehow lifted intact from the ocean beneath.
One of the Eqbas--a male, by the smaller build--inserted
a thin rod like a stylus into the column at waist height and studied
it. His head tilted sharply. Then he with drew the rod and reinserted
it near the base of the column. There was more vigorous head-tilting
and the column rose higher, an impossible tower of water with no
visible support rearing above a raft that shouldn't have been floating.
Shan was transfixed.
The column was at least five meters high now, and the
whole team was indulging in that head-tilting that said something had
completely engrossed them, something they weren't expecting.
"What are they doing?" she asked.
Esganikan stood beside her. When Shan turned, the Eqbas
matriarch was staring at her and not at the bizarre spectacle on the
glass raft.
"They're testing the sea at different depths to assess
contamination and biological activity."
Esganikan was standing so close that Shan felt an urge
to shove her in the chest and nick her for looking
at her funny as Rob McEvoy called it. Rob, her bagman, had been
a young inspector who she was grooming as a successor. Rob. Is he
still alive? She'd never returned his
message. She'd forgotten him. It appalled her. She'd make that a
priority.
Esganikan stepped back one pace. Shan could taste her
own scent of dominance, enough to keep the Eqbas commander in her
place. Esganikan could obviously smell it too, even in her suit.
"Did you acquire your jask
with your wess'har genes or have you always been this way?" she asked.
"I'll show you my file," said Shan, and didn't budge an
inch.
"I know who you are and what your task was."
"Is." Shan was distracted
by the raft again. It was moving away. "I haven't finished it yet."
The raft was moving fast, and not like a vessel
trailing spray or dipping and rising through the waves. It was simply
moving, level and utterly unnatural. There was no sign of wind whipping
the crew's loose suits and for a moment Shan's brain told her she was
watching a camera shot, a zoom out from a static scene.
"They're in a hurry."
"They have detected something." Esganikan paused as if
listening. "It may be another false reading. They found something that
looks like the waste products of bezeri in minute dilution."
"Survivors?"
"Or more recently dead."
Shan looked round and watched the land team for a
while. They were simply taking core samples with a tube that looked
much like the one used by Olivier Champciaux, the geologist who'd been
part of the Thetis team. He was another
person she hadn't thought of in a while: all the remaining payload, as
the marines had called the mission's scientists, were at Umeh Station. All
except the dead ones, anyway. And Rayat.
"What were you doing when they diverted you here?"
"We were returning from a patrol at Harsa. I believe
Shapakti's crew was assessing environmental imbalance on Nem Ijot.
Neither of us are ideal for this situation, but we could reach you far
more quickly than those with more specific experience."
"You sound experienced enough to me. Did you want to go
home?"
"I did. But this was a vital mission."
"Ironic. That's how I ended up here, too."
Esganikan might have understood or she might not, but
now she kept a respectful distance from Shan--still too close for a
human's comfort, but distant by wess'har standards--and walked with her
to where Shapakti stood with one of the core sampling teams.
"Can you decontaminate the area?" Shan asked.
Shapakti had a handful of soil cupped in his palms. "Yes. A season,
perhaps two."
"That's impressive."
"It is routine work. But we had hoped there might be
biological material we could use as a template for reconstruction."
"The grass." Shan used the English word. She didn't
have the wess'u for it. "Black grass."
"What?"
"There was black grass here. A plant that covers the
ground. Aras talked about it. He restored the island after the isenj
were driven off it."
Shapakti rubbed the soil between the palms of his
gloves. "He had material to work from."
"At least it's just Ouzhari." Yeah,
that's clever, you stupid cow. It's just Antarctica. It's just the
Galapagos. It's just the bezeri. "I meant that the damage is
localized. It could have been worse."
"Not for the bezeri."
The bore team stood around their drill, waiting, and
then Shan realized their rig was nothing like Champciaux's after all.
What she had thought was a solid shaft was a column of soil easing out
of the ground in the same way as the inexplicable column of seawater.
One of the group took a flat sheet of transparent material about the
size of a drinks tray and passed it through the column, which somehow
remained intact.
"Does he whip off a tablecloth and leave the plates in
place for an encore?" Shan asked, but she had slipped back into
vernacular English that defeated Shapakti. "What's he doing?"
"They are examining the soil under great magnification."
"With that thing?"
Shan had a nodding acquaintance with laboratory
equipment and no more. She nicked the polluters, the dealers in banned
biomaterials, the companies who crunched one gene sequence too many: it
was up to the boffins to sort out the detail. The Eqbas held the sheet
in his hands and studied it as if panning for gold. When she walked up
behind him to look, it was suddenly obvious what the sheet was.
She was looking at an image that could have come
straight off an electron microscope, and it might have been grains of
soil or bacteria. The magnified image covered the entire surface of the
sheet. "Now that's serious kit," she said.
"Whatever it is."
The scientist holding the sheet touched his glove
against the surface and isolated a single shape that made her think of
a radial hairbrush. The transparent sheet was busy overlaying it with
different images at a breakneck speed, blurring its outline.
"Pollen?" she said. She didn't even know if grass here
produced pollen. It was too easy to see familiar shapes and assume that
meant familiar biology.
"I don't know," said Shapakti. "We have never seen this
before. It bears no resemblance to anything from our databases. May I
take a sample from you?"
Shan rolled back her sleeve and held out her arm, which
was now showing muscle, although nowhere near at her normal levels. He
wants to rule out contamination by my cells,
she thought. It was basic forensic procedure, and she felt a sudden
nostalgic kinship with another investigator.
Shapakti pressed a gloved finger against the skin of
her forearm and studied the tip, then dabbed it on the glass tray. Shan
had no idea how he could separate a specific sample from the general
contamination he picked up on his gloves, but it seemed that he could,
because images began moving again on the surface of the tray. It was
dauntingly advanced technology. Shan thought she might sit quietly in a
corner with a flint and a few bits of straw and try to discover fire.
Shapakti shuffled his boots and pointed at the tray. "See. What you
have within you is the same as this."
The hairbrush images shuffled, distorted and lined up.
Then symbols that she didn't understand arranged themselves in a
cluster at the top left of the sheet.
So this was c'naatat. Shan
studied it, not really knowing what she was looking at but transfixed
by it nonetheless, and suddenly alarmed that he could obtain a sample
from unbroken skin. "Can you enlarge it?"
Each bristle of the brush resolved into more brushes,
complex and never-ending as a fractal. This was the organism that had
remade her--once, twice, three times at least. It had decided she
needed
claws, and changed its mind: then bioluminescence, but that satisfied
it. And it had taken a fancy to the ability to see shades of blue that
only wess'har could see, and the dubious gift of isenj genetic memory,
and scent communication, and things she couldn't even begin to guess at
because they hadn't made themselves known to her yet.
And it had kept her alive in space.
"Poor little sod," she said to herself, even though she
didn't like to think of it as being conscious of its actions. Maybe it
was. For now, it was a virus, or a bacterium, or an ultra-benign
disease; anything but a decision-making creature. "You don't look like
any trouble at all."
"We will still exercise caution," said Shapakti.
"I don't think it can do much harm now."
Shapakti held his arms slightly away from his sides as
if he had touched something especially messy. The bore team was
suddenly very still and so was he.
"It is not dead," he said.
The Pacific Rim
States and the African Assembly today issued an ultimatum to the
Federal European Union to end its deep space exploration program
"immediately and indefinitely" or face armed intervention.
The demand,
thought to have the tacit support of the Sinostates, follows
yesterday's shock revelation that EqbasVorhi intends to land on Earth
in thirty years'time. "I might be dead by the time that happens but my
kids won't be," said UN delegate Jim Matsoukis. "If we stop this insane
colonial adventuring right now we might avert an unprecedented
disaster."
It's not yet
known if the FEU will give in to pressure to recall its warship
Hereward, still heading for the Cavanagh's Star
system. "We still have people stranded out there and we won't abandon
them," said an FEU spokesman.
BBChantext 1667. See UN debate live at
1800 EUST.
"He should have known," said Shan.
Esganikan walked with her, a rare study in matriarchal
patience. They had trailed up and down the Ouzhari shoreline for a
couple of hours, stopping to look out to sea as the afternoon wore on
and the rest of the survey team trailed back to the ship to eat. Shan
could see it from the beach: a luminous copper cylinder, its shape now
more like an igloo with an entrance tunnel, with waves of faint light
shimmering across its hull as the automated decontamination system
swept it clean of radiation. Shan could walk here with impunity but it
was still a dangerous, poisoned place for all other life.
Except c'naatat.
"I don't understand why this makes you angry," said
Esganikan. "An organism has survived. The situation is not completely
desperate."
Shan jerked her thumb over her shoulder at the lifeless
beach behind her. She fell back on English. "It's a fucking barbecue
here. What's not desperate?" Esganikan
stood impassive and silent. Shan concentrated on wess'u again. "Sorry.
Not only is this as bad as I could imagine, but the bezeri died for
nothing. And Rayat is a scientist. He knows that even some terrestrial
bacteria can survive radiation. This was a big, sloppy, stupid gamble.
Look." She held out her arms, flipping her hands over and back again to
demonstrate them. "I'm probably here now because some bacteria have a
talent for surviving anything."
Esganikan brushed something from her soft environment
suit. It reminded Shan of a burqa.
"I learned your language in days, but I will never
learn how you think. This is all irrelevant."
"Maybe I'm not wess'har enough to feel that way."
"You desire balance. That is what police require, isn't
it?"
"Yeah, and we don't often get it."
"And what if the survey team find bezeri still alive?
Will that anger you too?"
"Have you got Aras's signal lamp?"
"Yes."
"Then if you find any, tell them Shan Frankland is
sorry--again. I bet that's the one English word they don't need
translated by now."
Esganikan went back to the ship. Shan sat down
cross-legged on the sand to wait for the glass raft to return, suddenly
aware she was probably sitting on organisms that had changed her life
beyond human recognition. She picked up a handful of soil and sifted it
between her fingers.
Shapakti approached her, giving her a wide berth like a
nervous beekeeper in his loose pale suit and veil. Everything that
wess'har made, even the sinister stuff like weapons and biohaz suits,
had a certain functional elegance.
"You haven't eaten." Shapakti's agitation made it clear
he didn't want her to get the wrong idea about his offer of food. It
wasn't a sexual invitation. "Aras insisted that I make you eat
regularly. Come back to the ship."
"I have to decontaminate first or I'll make you all
light up. Can't be arsed at the moment"
"Is that a refusal?"
"Yes, it is."
"I will bring food to you, then."
"Don't worry. You're perfectly safe, mate. You're not
my type." She saw his pupils snap from four-petaled flower to cross
wires even behind the suit's draped visor: he might have been working
out what mate meant and fearing for his
honor again. "Would you do me a favor? Before we leave, can I visit
Constantine?"
"Of course. You can go now if you wish, while we wait
for the others to return."
"How? I could walk, but it's a hell of a long way."
"What?"
"I can't drown. I've done it. I walked into the water
and visited the bezeri. Can't say I enjoyed the sensation, though."
"It is indeed a long way to walk, especially in your
condition. I will find a vessel."
He beckoned to her and she followed him back to the
craft. Two years alongside utterly alien technology had raised her
amazement threshold and she was expecting some part of the small craft
to detach itself and form a boat or some other form of transport. But
Shapakti simply opened a hatch in the igloo-ship's tunnel of an
entrance lobby and removed a milky smooth cube thirty centimeters
square.
"What's that?"
"You called it a raft. A niluy-ghur."
"Oh, this is going to be one of those conjuring tricks,
isn't it?" She had once watched a wess'har take a simple jointed stick
and snap it into a frame that made a stool. Working surfaces emerged
like protoplasm from hard flat walls: metal waste biodegraded in hours.
Wess'har were good at manipulating two things--solid materials and
cells. "White man's magic. Go on. Surprise me."
Shapakti placed the cube at the water's edge and it
unfurled itself like an emergency life raft, first folding out into a
flat transparent blanket of gel and then becoming rigid. The sea lapped
at it. It slid obediently into the water to form a solid platform with
one edge still on the beach, and Shapakti walked onto it and stood
waiting.
Shan put one foot on the raft. She would have felt
safer if she'd had her old boots. It didn't feel quite the same world
in the matte gray ones that an anonymous benefactor in F'nar had
fashioned for her, even though they were superior boots, silent and
thermally perfect and self-cleaning, and they shaped themselves to
whatever height and fit she wanted them to be. But they didn't go with
the remains of her uniform and they didn't announce her arrival. She
missed her old boots.
The raft was rock-solid and didn't move when she put
her full weight on it like a boat would have done. As soon as she was
inboard--if standing on a glass sheet could ever be considered
inboard--it moved away into the shallows and out to sea. A column rose
out of the surface in front of Shapakti, a plinth of glass-clear
material, and images danced in its top layer almost like the virin
communicator Nevyan had given her.
Shapakti touched the column and the raft began making
speed. If Shan hadn't already seen the vessel in action, she would have
abandoned ship there and then. There was no undulation or feeling of
the wind in her hair, and she could easily have been standing on an
immobile solid floor while the ocean and the landscape moved around and
past her and under her like a disturbingly
good simulation. No water slopped over the bows, such as they were. And
she was looking down through the water between her feet. Weed and other
unidentifiable debris churned up by the raft's motion roiled in a space
trapped between the ocean and the bottom of the hull.
"Tell me this thing doesn't fly," she said.
"Why?"
"I meant that humans don't cope well with seeing the
ground a long way beneath them, even if they're on a solid glass floor.
They always think they're going to fall."
"You survived in space. You coped well enough."
"Yeah, but I don't want to do it again."
"And it could fly if we
were to modify it."
Landing on Bezer'ej for the
first time: Ade Bennett closed the hatch behind her and she was looking
through the transparent section of the shuttle's hull as the AI took
over and tipped her out into space. It felt like a long and terrible
fall. Her stomach rolled. Shan shook herself out of the memory
and put out her hand to steady herself even though there was no
movement. A glass column flowed up from the deck to meet it.
It was faintly warm and yielding, like a layer of
insulation over steel. "You do like your glass," she said. "Glass
utensils, glass drains, glass bells. Glass people."
"You like to be able to see through things, Shan
Frankland. So do we."
Shapakti brought his heel down hard on the deck and it
extruded a glass booth around him. He slipped off his biohaz suit and
the raft swallowed it, sealing it into the deck in a bubble. "Now you,"
he said. He kicked a booth into place around her. It felt like being
shrink-wrapped for market. "Or you will take contamination to
Constantine."
The seascape streaked past them, spray and wind held at
bay by barriers that she couldn't see. She checked the time on her
swiss. Constantine, a hundred miles north of Ouzhari at the top of the
chain of islands, was now in sight. The raft must have been making at
least ninety knots and yet there was still no sensation of movement.
She stepped off the raft onto a familiar beach and it
was suddenly and unexpectedly heartbreaking.
A perfectly spherical stone inlaid with intricate
patterns of color stood at the high-water line. It was the Place of
Memory of the First, the memorial to the first bezeri pilot who beached
himself to gather information about the Dry Above.
"You know what this says?" she said. Shapakti studied
the patterns, just as she had studied them when Aras first showed her
the stone. "It says that the nineteenth of the
shoal of Ehek launched himself out of the water and told the waiting
ones all he could see of the Dry Above before he died an honorable
death. A suicide mission. After that they developed pod ships
with water jets that propelled them back into the water. It was like
the early days of space flight to them."
Shapakti followed her down the beach to another large
stone memorial, this time a conical one with lines of color spiraling
down its sides. Shan patted it. "The Place of Memory of the Returned.
The first bezeri who came ashore and made it back. And now they're all
gone."
"Perhaps not all." Shapakti stroked his long
multijointed fingers over the inlaid stone. "There were several hundred
thousand."
"And what if you find a few? A hundred? A dozen? It
took them centuries for their population to recover last time and they
started out with a lot more. And how can they rebuild?"
"Humans were reduced to hundreds at one time in their
evolution."
"And that's a role model?"
"I merely offer a positive future."
"You know what?" Shan began walking up the beach,
shaking off memories of when she thought she'd be off Bezer'ej and
heading home inside a year, back to a quiet retirement with a garden
full of unregistered tomato hybrids. "If you find any bezeri, we should
let them have Lindsay Neville. And Rayat. Their call."
Constantine, the Mountain to the Dry Above, was
returning to its wild origins. The blue and amber grasses had crept
back over the site where the Thetis
mission had made its camp. Even the recently abandoned fields of the
colony were already being overrun by island species. Without the
invisible biobarrier that contained the colony and allowed a
terrestrial ecology to exist, the crops were dying.
It was a glimpse of the fate that would have befallen
the Constantine mission nearly two centuries before had an exiled alien
soldier called Aras Sar Iussan not intervened to help them survive.
Shan had worked in those fields for a few months. She
walked back through them towards the underground colony, looking for
the discreet skylight bubbles that blistered the landscape, but she
couldn't pick them out. She was right on top of the colony before she
saw it.
At the top of the ramp that led down into the excavated
galleries, she wondered if the tunnels were still accessible. Nanites
had been scattered to reclaim the building materials and erase all
traces of the gethes. When Ade and
Barencoin had dragged her bound and gagged from the place, the walls
were already crumbling.
"I'm going to see how far I can get," she said. "I'll
call if I need help."
"I will accompany you," said Shapakti. "A cave-in is
less alarming than the anger of your males."
The subterranean colony, once as striking a feat of
excavation as the Nabataeans' Petra, had been robbed of its light and
was now pitch-black. Shan's adapted vision kicked in and she picked her
way through piles of soil and fallen stone. Her boot crunched on
something, and when she looked down it was the remains of an ESF670
rifle, the one she had taken from Chahal and tried to fire into Lindsay
Neville's head. The nanites had dismantled most of it; the buffer pin
and return springs seemed to be the last items on the menu for them.
"They used to have sunlight down here," she said. "Aras
never did tell me how they managed that. Are you okay, Shapakti?"
"I can see well enough to walk."
Wess'har had evolved from burrow dwellers: low light
didn't hamper them, but Shan switched on the flashlight in her swiss
anyway. Shapakti didn't have the infrared vision that c'naatat
had given her.
The map of Constantine was etched in her mind. She
sniffed, tasting decay on the stale air. No, not decay: putre-faction.
She'd smelled that so often in
her life that there was no mistaking it for anything else. It was a
corpse.
The colonists left their dead for the native
rockvelvets. There were no flies here, nor any of the usual terrestrial
insects that lived on the dead. The colony had only been interested in
resurrecting pollinators from the gene bank.
Shan thought that a good old-fashioned bluebottle would
have been just the job right then. "Can you smell it?"
"I smell…sulfur compounds."
The wess'har sense of smell was acute. After a couple
months in a warm environment bodies had usually peaked in stench, but
the microecology here was shot to hell. And rockvelvets only fed in the
open. Decay was slow.
Shan reached in the back of her belt for her gun,
purely out of habit in a dark and now unfamiliar place, and Shapakti
made a little noise of surprise. Maybe he thought she knew something he
didn't. His sudden whiff of alarm managed to cut through the smell of
rotting meat. The tunnels were silent except for their footsteps and
the sporadic sifting noise of falling soil.
"You're not breathing," said Shapakti.
No, she wasn't. It was funny how you could forget to do
some things. She made a conscious effort to start again. She headed for
the abandoned church of St. Francis, reasoning that if she were a
religious colonist in trouble then she'd go there when things got
really bad.
GOVERNMENT WORK IS GOD'S WORK
The inscription--archaic, arrogant, delusional--was still
legible in the block of hard stone that had come from Ouzhari, the
original landing site. Shan just walked in, aware that neither the dead
nor the living could harm her but cautious nonetheless. And this wasn't
a crime scene with evidence to protect and secure.
The efte door was gone and
she walked along the aisle as she had first done two years ago, a Pagan
disturbing someone else's hallowed ground. But there was no magnificent
stained-glass window of the saint who respected all life. The stone
frame was empty, the glass pieces safe on Mar'an'cas. And the carved efte
pews with their dancing angels had been
devoured and recycled by the nanites.
She could now both see and smell her target. It was a
group of bodies, not one, and when she looked down at them with her
hand over her nose and mouth she could see that the group was a man, a
woman and two children.
Even if she had known them there was no way she could
recognize them now. The woman had long brown hair and there were two
hardened slices of bread nearby. One had neat bite marks taken out of
it. The cause of death didn't matter any more. But it didn't look as if
they starved.
"Stupid bastards," she said. "Some of them wouldn't
leave."
Shapakti peered at the bodies, cocking his head in
fascination. Of course: if he was going to learn anything about human
biology, he would learn it from a dead body, not a live one. Wess'har
had no concept of the vivisection of other species.
"Where is the part that still lives?" he asked. "The
invisible component?"
"The soul? Oh, that's just crap. A story."
"Like c'naatat."
"Shapakti, my old mate, they're dead.
Trust me. I've seen a few stiffs in my time." Here
I go, copper's lairy mouth again, shutting myself off from it all by
being flippant. "They're not decomposing normally because there
isn't the range of insects here to do the job the Earth way. If you
want some samples, go ahead."
"The anti-human pathogen worked."
"I'd say. It was based on my original DNA. I always did
have an antisocial streak in me." She watched him squat down and place
a thin rod at various points in the tangle of misshapen, discolored
limbs. The bodies were huddled together, embracing: a family, probably.
"Did I look that bad when they brought me in?"
"I believe that your shape was more coherent."
"Flatterer." She thought of a hundred other corpses
whose last moments she had reconstructed. "There's a part of me that
says put them outside for the rockvelvets, but I'm buggered if I'm
going to move them in that state." Deconsecrated
or not, the church is where they wanted to die. Leave them in peace.
"When you've got what you want, let's go."
A little over two months ago Shan had stood here, her
back to the altar, and addressed the thousand or so colonists. The man,
woman and children lying here had heard her tell them to leave, to
abandon all they'd worked for. She looked at the faces and couldn't see
who had once looked back at her.
Movement caught her eye.
She aimed her gun two-handed and strained to see.
Whatever it was, it was small. She walked into the corner behind the
pile of sawdust that had once been the altar and noticed a pattern of
tiny footprints and a faint smell. She knew that scent. It was almost
like lavender leaves. She put her gun back in her belt and squatted
down, looking for rats.
"Come on out, fellas," she said. She made the clicking
noise she'd heard Aras use with Black and White to get them to come to
him. "Come on. I won't hurt you."
Shapakti edged up behind her. "What is it?"
"Rats. The colony abandoned them. Poor little buggers
must be living on the bodies." She didn't dare risk a bite. An immortal
rat was a prospect she wasn't ready to contemplate, and she didn't have
thick enough gloves to withstand those teeth. Sticking her hand into a
hole was a recipe for disaster. She drummed her fingers on the floor
until a whiskered nose emerged from a crack in the stone.
"What are they?"
"Earth animals. The Thetis
mission brought them for experiments."
"Oh."
"Yeah. Oh. Aras
confiscated them from Rayat and let the kids look after them. He really
likes them." She found herself smiling. There was nothing wrong with a
man who cared about animals, nothing at all, even if he wiped out
cities. She drummed her fingers again and a large beige rat bounded
towards her and sniffed her gloves. She withdrew her hand cautiously.
"They're tame ones."
She fumbled in her pockets. She always kept something
on hand to eat, and this time she found a very old packet of dry
rations. It did the trick. In a minute she had assembled fourteen rats
of varying sizes and colors, all jostling for food.
"I can't just leave them here," she said. "They'll
starve to death. Got a bag or something?"
Shapakti offered her a tube the size of a cigar.
"What's that?"
"A container." He bent it between his fingers and it
unfurled into a large open box with curved sides. "Here."
"I bet you were a Boy Scout."
"You are incomprehensible."
"It's just a compliment."
Shapakti picked up the rats, each steadfastly refusing
to be parted from its fragment of compressed soya and fruit, and placed
them in the box. Shan took off her jacket and laid it across the open
top; she didn't know much about rats, but she knew they preferred the
comfort and safety of the dark.
"You're undernourished," said Shapakti.
"Give me a few weeks, son," she said, anticipating
Aras's delight at the rescue. "Then come and feel my biceps."
They walked a different route through the fields on the
way back to the raft. The tayberry bushes were still there, brown and
twisted, and it was hard to tell if they were dead or just dormant.
Someone should have cut back the old canes to ground level. On a stone
facing the sun, two rich black velvet place-mats patterned with
concentric lighter rings lay sunning themselves. They shivered at
Shan's approach and began sliding off the rock to inch away to safety.
"Rockvelvets," she said. "Human eyes can't see the
rings. Did you know that?"
"I would like to know what else c'naatat
has changed in you."
"I'll tell you all about it one day."
Ceret was setting fast. Skimming south across the sea
towards Ouzhari on a sheet of glass in failing light and then in the
dark was unnerving, but if you'd drifted in space for a couple of
months it was suddenly a long way down the sphincter constriction scale.
Shan was beginning to enjoy sailing. She wondered how
Ade might like it. The niluy-ghur would
have made a great amphibious landing craft if the camouflage could have
been sorted out.
By the time they beached, Shapakti was back in his
beekeeper's suit and the box of rats was wrapped in a protective gel
film. The Eqbas craft was a gleaming bronze beacon swept sporadically
by rippling blue light, looking for all the world like a sleazy
nightclub situated on the edge of town because the neighbors objected
to the noise.
At the entrance, Shan submitted to decontamination in
what she now thought of as a plastic bag and wondered if this was what
it felt like to be trapped by a sheven
just before it began digesting you. It might have been worse than
spacing yourself.
"We've brought some guests," she said.
Esganikan was kneeling on the deck with the crew,
eating from plates as if they were on a picnic. Shan picked up a dark
brown slab and chewed on it, not caring that it tasted like solid yeast
extract.
"I hope you didn't mind my bringing back the rats,"
said Shan. "They couldn't survive here."
"I don't object."
"So? Any news?"
"The marine survey team has located a number of
bezeri," said Esganikan.
"Dead?"
"Alive."
Shan's stomach flipped but she couldn't distinguish
between her own relief and dread. So you found someone alive in a pile
of bodies, and that was good for five seconds; and then it dawned on
you what they would be going through.
"How many?"
"Fifty-four."
"And what shape are they in? Did you manage to use the
signaling lamp?"
Esganikan looked for a moment the way Shan had so often
felt, shoulders sagging in weary disillusion.
"We may have to work without them to repair the
ecosphere. But we will repair it."
It was an oddly evasive answer for a wess'har. But
their logic was utterly unsentimental. The bezeri were the obvious
victims to a human, but they weren't the only species to suffer: others
were woven into the ecology.
Shan tried again. "What did they say,
exactly?"
"They will talk only to Aras Sar Iussan."
In their hour of need, the bezeri had turned to the one
outsider in whom they had any degree of trust. Aras would be reassured
by that, Shan thought.
She also wondered what they wanted to say to him that
they couldn't say to anyone else.
This is our final
request. We demand that you return both the traitor Par Paral Ual and
the Destroyer of Mjat so that they may face proper justice.
MINISTER
PAR NIR BEDOI,
Northern Assembly
The vessel that had separated itself to
visit Bezer'ej appeared over F'nar, dropping beneath the cloud cover
and settling in the Eqbas camp. Aras straightened up and put his hoe
aside for a few moments to watch it. The marines stopped too.
Shan was back. He had pined every moment she was away.
It had only been two days, but he never wanted to let her out of his
sight again, and neither had Ade, but she insisted on going alone.
"She'll be wanting her dinner on the table," said Ade,
and dusted his hands on his pants. "Let's get this finished and head
home."
"I hope Shapakti took care of her."
"You can bet on it," Ade said. "We had a little chat."
Ade's little chats seemed
to have a salutary effect. Aras suspected it was the unsettling effect
of a polite and modest manner backed up by physical strength and the
slightest suggestion that--if pushed--he might kill you. Yes, Ade had
the
makings of a fine house-brother: Aras would welcome his genes. And the
soldier knew what it was to grapple with unpleasant memories and
tolerate exile.
"Aras, how do you feel about the Eqbas?" asked Qureshi.
"They're different," he said carefully. So many of them
were unmated adults. It was unnatural. "But so am I, so I cannot
criticize."
He went to the irrigation node and rinsed his hands and
face under the rushing water. The marines went on hoeing, preparing the
ground within the biobarrier for beans, potatoes and something called
chickpeas. The area devoted to terrestrial crops had expanded
five-fold; there were eight people to feed now who couldn't digest
wess'har food and the supplies were running low. For the first time,
the Constantine colony had no carefully preserved surpluses to give
away. But the marines seemed to be enjoying their rapid instruction in
horticulture and had reduced the soil to a textbook fine tilth with
precise lines of drills. They were happy to be busy. They didn't seem
to care how their time was occupied as long as it was filled with
activity.
Aras reflected that it was a perfect image of the gethes
concept of irony. An alien was teaching
urbanized humans how to grow their own crops.
"Painting coal white," said Ade. He squatted down at
the end of one of Becken's drills and peered along the line in the soil
as if to check for perfection.
Aras considered the concept. "A new phrase for me."
"A pointless activity to keep soldiers busy." Ade took
a handful of red beans and began pressing them into the furrow at
precise intervals with his thumb. "Is this the right depth?"
"I thought you came from a rural part of Earth."
"Me? Nah. City boy."
"You fed baby foxes. Foxes are wild animals, yes?"
"Yeah, but they're all over the cities. Lots of animals
live in urban areas."
Aras felt that he should have realized that. The
information--and plenty of it--had been in Constantine's archives. The
urban coexistence made the gulf of respect between gethes
and other species even more incomprehensible to him.
"Yes," said Aras. "That's the correct depth."
"Join the Marines, see the galaxy, and do a bit of
gardening," said Barencoin, who had started to look satisfied with his
agricultural duties. "Beats getting your arse shot off, anyway."
"You'd fit right in with the colonists," said Webster.
"I don't think Jesus wants me for a sunbeam somehow."
They laughed raucously and while they worked Becken
told a joke about a gethes with a
tapeworm. Aras listened intently. When he had first discovered the
parasitic creature while reading the colony archives, he had briefly
thought of his c'naatat as a benevolent
tapeworm. Becken's story alleged that tapeworms enjoyed certain human
foods.
Becken had one arm raised with an imaginary hammer in
his hand. "So the tapeworm puts his head up and says, �Where's me bar
of nutty, then?' and the doctor goes--wallop."
The marines roared with laughter. Aras, who felt he had
some measure of the gethes' humor, pitied
the tapeworm, who had no choice about the arrangement. His distaste
must have shown; or at least he must have smelled agitated, because Ade
straightened up from the furrow of beans and gave him a discreet jerk
of the head that indicated he wanted Aras to follow him.
"Let's leave this lot to it," he said. "Come on. Can't
keep the missus waiting."
There was a perfectly matched chorus of "Oooo-oooo-ooo!" from the
marines and Aras suspected he knew what that
meant. Ade's face reddened. Aras handed his hoe to Chahal.
They walked away briskly. "I meant your
missus," said Ade.
"I know."
"I can move out."
"Shan made you return last time. Your leaving will not
take away her sense of obligation or attraction."
"And what do you want?"
It was easy for a normal wess'har to say what was on
their mind. But Aras had been tinted by human hesitation. He thought
for a few seconds, filtering the words. "I miss having house-brothers.
I would like us to be a family. But I worry that Shan would feel
obliged to choose between us because humans are monogamous."
Ade walked on a little way ahead. He didn't say
anything else until they passed through the two outcrops of
pearl-coated granite that marked the broken edge of the caldera, as
near to a pair of gates as a carefully unplanned city like F'nar would
ever allow.
"She'd never leave you. She's not like that."
Aras knew that. But it didn't mean that she would want to
stay with him. Shan was a creature of
duty; the thought of her enduring him if she wanted to be with Ade
alone was unbearable. She might grow to resent him in time. He couldn't
face that.
"I lost my first isan and
I very nearly lost Shan. The thought of losing her again terrifies me."
"And you must know what I feel for her. But I've done
enough damage. I don't want to do any more."
"The decision will be hers."
They reached the door and there was a moment of
hesitation as Aras stood back to let Ade enter first and Ade did the
same. There was no natural hierarchy between them yet. Aras stepped
across the threshold, flustered.
"I'll get the kettle on," said Ade. "I make a good cup
of tea, she says."
Aras had been so certain that having Shan back would
make life perfect. But it wasn't working out that way at all. She had a
second chance at life, and a very long one at that. He wanted it to be
happier than what had gone before.
He would do whatever it took to ensure that.
"And then they will do what, exactly?" demanded
Esganikan Gai. She slammed her virin down
on the table so Ual could see the vague ultimatum from his respected
colleague Bedoi. "The isenj will use force if we don't comply? Or is
this just talk?"
Her English was becoming excellent, and very rapidly.
Ual tried hard to stop his beads shivering on his quills: he had been
in F'nar a week now and was becoming agitated. In the Exchange of
Surplus Things he had a permanent audience because, as Eddie told him,
wess'har washed their dirty linen in public.
"There is a great deal of rhetoric in public life that
wess'har are unfamiliar with," said Ual. "Sometimes politicians don't
think before they speak. Their concern is saying what will satisfy the
electorate."
Eddie Michallat, who had been sitting quietly on a
crate a little to Ual's right, uncrossed his legs. "Well, that's
something our species have in common."
"I will tell you what's going to happen," said
Esganikan. A small knot of wess'har was watching her: a few more were
more interested in the image occupying most of one of the walls, an
image of an orderly city of towering fungus-like buildings and much
vegetation. "We have assessed your planet from orbit for restoration
purposes. We have so few species to work from that we will introduce
those from Tasir Var that appear appropriate. The alternative is that
your situation deteriorates until you reach a terminal population
crisis and natural disaster overtakes you. Either way, you will be
confined to your two planets. Containment measures are being put in
place."
We weren't going anywhere anyway.
Ual didn't want war. There was nowhere on Umeh to fight one. "When will
you take me back to Umeh?"
"When we land, you will be with us."
"And when will that be?"
"Would tomorrow be soon enough? I have some business to
attend to with the gethes and I would like
that completed before we visit your people."
Eddie exhaled very slowly and quietly. Ual took it as
suppressed surprise.
"While you're on the blower to Earth," said Eddie, "could you see if
they'll connect me to my News Desk, please?"
Esganikan stood up and it was clear the conversation
was over. She strode out with her ussissi aide scuttling behind her.
Eddie watched her go and then turned to Ual.
"If Shan and that one ever ganged up, I'd leave town,"
said Eddie.
"A formidable creature. I have not yet met Shan
Frankland." Ual felt the need to confide in Eddie. "I have made a great
mistake."
Eddie shook his head. "What's the alternative? The
Eqbas were coming the minute the bombs went off on Bezer'ej. After
that, all you can do is get the best deal for your people that you can.
Damage limitation."
"We should have chosen our allies more carefully."
"I don't think anyone planned this. We never do."
"Will you come with me, Eddie?"
He raised his eyebrows. "I've never filmed a lynching."
"We do not lynch."
"So what's the worst that can happen to you?"
"Imprisonment. Disgrace."
"Am I going to make that much difference? I don't think
having Earth media present is going to deter your people one bit."
"I would feel comforted to have a friend with me."
"Oh."
Ual had not seen his family for some weeks. Long
separations were normal: his offspring were too young to live
independently, and they were being educated on Tasir Var, a world he
had never visited. His mate had gone to look after them. She hadn't yet
replied to his message that told her what he'd done and how afraid he
was. She might have already abandoned him to find another male. He had
no way of knowing.
And now he had grown tired of the pretense with Eddie.
He reached into his belt for the blue bead, with every intention of
telling Eddie that he knew what he had done with the quill, and that it
no longer mattered because he had voluntarily given his own sample: but
he couldn't. Eddie had saved him from a decision that might have been
catastrophic. Plausible deniability. He'd
even taught him the concept.
Ual let his arm fall back. "I will attempt to talk my
way out of it when we land. I believe that's something you're good at,
yes?"
"They do say."
"I might even tell an untruth. Will you help me?"
"Eddie Michallat, the man who introduced lying to the
isenj nation. What an epitaph."
"The truth can be very much overrated."
"You're not wrong there."
Ual got up and made his way towards the entrance. It
was a bright, clear day. Eddie followed him outside and they picked
their way through the alleys and out onto the ill-defined path that led
out through the fields to the wild unspoiled plain.
Wess'har--Targassati
wess'har, anyway--didn't like to leave permanent marks on the landscape
if they could help it. It was one of the most interesting facts he had
learned.
"Where are we going?" asked Eddie.
"For a walk."
Eddie probably understood. He followed at a distance.
It was the most extraordinary sensation to move without
rules on pace and direction, without being required to keep to one side
of the road or the other, to stop and start and turn as you pleased.
The space he had felt…anarchic.
There was nobody he could collide with. There were no
open spaces like this on Umeh. The only areas that had not been
completely built over were the ice deserts, and even now the huge
expense of urbanizing them seemed inevitable if the population was to
be housed.
A shape overhead made Ual start. But it wasn't a
vessel. It was a flying creature of some kind, in fact a whole group of
them moving slowly across the sky with steadily flapping wings. They
had no purpose for the wess'har. They simply existed here with them. He
had never seen wild creatures on Umeh. Nobody had, not in living memory.
Umeh could have this one day. It wouldn't be authentic,
but it would be a new reality. He inhaled the air. Isenj could tolerate
a wider range of atmospheres than humans, but good clean air free of
the by-products of crowded living tasted sweet whatever its composition.
"Why did they build F'nar here? There are pleasant
grasslands and forests right across the planet."
Eddie shrugged. "They chose the barren places where few
native species lived."
"They take that much care?"
"I know. It's hard for humans to understand too. We'd
have hogged the best seats right away." The breeze whipped his hair.
"I've tried to understand why they're like this. On Earth, the species
and individuals that grabbed most survived. Where the wess'har came
from, the species that cooperated best were the ones who made it. I
want to go to Eqbas Vorhi. I have to see it for myself."
Isenj were competitive too. Competition had limits.
Ual opened his mouth and took in as much of the clean
air as he could gulp down. He spent the rest of the afternoon weaving
an irregular path back and forth across the plain of F'nar, stunned by
the space and the endless vista of tiny, fast-growing winter plants and
bright pearl cliff faces.
He was right. He knew now that he was, and that
whatever price he paid would be worth it.
The detail of
Earth geopolitics probably means little to you, but I want to assure
you that the FEU does not speak or act on
behalf of the whole planet. We too are appalled at the events in your
system. We have now forced the FEU to turn back its warship
Hereward and we hope you will take that as a
token of our genuine wish to stay out of your affairs. The United
Nations, an international peacekeeping organization that represents all
Earth states, has imposed a permanent and global ban on travel and
exploration beyond our own solar system. We hope this measure will
convince you that there is no need for you to intervene here to
guarantee your own security.
UN Secretary General MARIE-CLAUDE
GARCES, in a message to Curas Ti
The scent of jask
hit Nevyan before she entered the Exchange of Surplus Things. Esganikan
and Shan were locked in disagreement. She didn't need to see either of
them to know that.
"They are below," said
Serrimissani.
Nevyan hurried down the passage that stretched under
the Exchange to the subterranean hangars where F'nar's fighter craft
were housed. The terrestrial gene bank had been placed there for
safekeeping. She followed the scent that Shan had tagged mango
and found her and Esganikan standing by
the row of dull gray composite cabinets that held as comprehensive a
selection of the Earth's plant and animal species as anyone could
assemble. Many no longer existed on their own planet. And Shan's
posture as she stood in front of the cabinets said clearly that she
would not surrender their contents.
Shapakti, two of his crew, four F'nar citizens on
maintenance duties and Aitassi stood at a sensible distance from the
matriarchs. A definite space had cleared around the two even though
their pheromonally charged debate would have no impact on the hierarchy
of F'nar.
To a human, it might have looked like a discussion.
Shan was leaning against one cabinet, arms folded, and Esganikan was
speaking quietly to her in wess'u, the linguistically neutral territory
they had settled upon. But their scent said very clearly that they were
jostling for dominance.
"I think it's a very risky move," said Shan.
"Nobody can own this resource."
"I don't claim to own it, but its safety is my personal
responsibility."
"It should return to Earth. The species should all be
restored."
"And what if we fuck up
again? The whole gene bank is gone."
"We will ensure that no gethes…"
Esganikan got to grips with the new phrase: her red plume bobbed. "… fucks
up again."
Nevyan stepped across the moat of space around the two
females.
"We're discussing what should happen to the gene bank,"
said Shan, but she didn't take her eyes off Esganikan. "I'm concerned
about committing all of it to Earth."
A powerful defensive scent made Nevyan glance towards
Esganikan for an opinion and Shan simply turned to look at her. Shan
was her friend. And Shan should have been standing where Nevyan was
now: the human had outscented Chayyas when she first came to the city,
and so the senior matriarchy of F'nar was hers by right. She had chosen
to hand that to Mestin. Mestin had ceded to Nevyan.
And Nevyan never thought she might have to test her jask
against Shan Frankland.
She met Shan's eyes and the message was clear: are
you on my side or what? She could almost
hear her saying it. It was the or what
that always had such finality about it.
"I agree with Shan Chail,"
said Nevyan. She did: but even if she didn't, she trusted Shan's
judgment over a stranger's. She smelled her own determination well up
and add to the pheromonal mix. "Before any of this material returns to
Earth there must be a duplicate bank, maintained out of the reach of gethes."
"I'd go along with that," said Shan.
"Can you do this?" asked Nevyan.
Esganikan's scent was diminishing. She took a step back
from Shan, who unfolded her arms. "Yes. It can be done. We need access
to examine the specimens."
"I'll show Shapakti around later," said Shan, and made
no attempt to step away from the cabinet. She smiled, but there was no
movement in the muscles around her eyes. Esganikan and her party stood
blinking for a few moments and then left.
Nevyan waited.
"Thanks," said Shan. "I think we out-mangoed her."
"I have never known two isan've
need to confront another together to achieve consensus." Nevyan had to
ask. "You're quite capable of asserting your dominance over her on your
own, so why did you not do so?"
"I didn't want your job then, and I don't want hers
now. There's a time and a place for throwing your weight around and
this isn't it."
"How do you control your scent?"
"I just can. I suggest we see her together when there's
critical business to be done, or she'll just walk all over you. And me,
if I'm not as hard as I think I am."
It wasn't an insult. It was a statement of fact and a
prudent precaution. "I know I can rely on you to support me, Shan."
Shan stepped away from the cabinet and stood looking at
it, arms folded again and her lips pressed together as if she resented
it for dragging her so far from home. She opened it with a touch on a
recessed panel. Cold air rolled out from the cabinet in a breath of
fog, and inside it layer upon layer of thin shelves held a snapshot of
a planet Nevyan had never seen.
"Will you travel back with the gene bank?" asked Nevyan.
"I can't. This is home now." Shan betrayed neither
regret nor satisfaction. "My mission was to retrieve the unpatented
strains of food crops. Perault never said anything about my returning
with them, and I don't reckon she gave a monkey's toss if I came back
or not. Once the samples ship out, my obligation ceases."
Shan took a small object out of her jacket, not her own
communications device but one like those that had been confiscated from
Rayat and Neville. She tossed it a little way in the air and caught it
again in one hand. "Guess what?"
"I cannot follow this conversation."
"Okay, I've been going through Rayat's handheld to get
names. But I came across correspondence with Eugenie Perault, the
minister who gave me my Suppressed Briefing."
Shan began walking towards the exit and beckoned Nevyan
to follow.
"And?"
"It's routine. It's just the combination of people that
sets my bells ringing. There's no reason for her to talk to a
pharmacologist, so she was talking to him as a spy. Now, ministers
normally have whole departments of minions who do that for them, so if
she was having personal conversations with him, I'm pretty sure they
were along the same lines of the one she had with me, because she
usually didn't talk to lowly EnHaz coppers either."
"He was not a factor in your Suppressed Briefing?"
"No. But I'm bloody sure now that he knew what he was
looking for out here. I just want to know why he was tasked to find c'naatat
and if Perault was the one who sent
him."
"I would think that was obvious."
"Not if you know Perault. She was a devout Christian,
and her sister was an eco-terrorist. One of those I helped when I
really shouldn't have. I didn't know who she was at the time. Call me
naive."
"You sound as if you regret what you did."
"Not at all. I'd do it all over again. I'd just go in
harder next time, that's all." Shan stared at the handheld as she
walked, apparently willing information to extract itself from the
device. "And it doesn't even matter if she sent him with a different
set of orders to me, but I need to know anyway. I hate loose ends. It's
one of those obsessions that makes me a copper."
"Will he tell you?"
"I get the feeling he wants me to try to thrash it out
of him to show he can get the better of me."
"And are you determined to show him he can't?"
"When you put it like that, it does sound puerile."
They came out into the main hall of the Exchange and
some wess'har paused to sniff the air, reacting to the wild cocktail of
scents that still clung to them.
"You let them live because you want to know these
things? Is that all?"
"I let them live because Esganikan told me not to shoot
them. But yes, I want to know." If Shan was annoyed by her criticism
she didn't let it show. There was no trace of any scent or expression.
"I don't like relying on gut instinct, but sometimes it's the best
there is and it's saved me on more than one occasion. And something's
telling me that I can't close this unless I know what Perault was up
to. It might be irrelevant, but I know there's a missing piece and it
just might be significant."
"What now?"
"I'm going to get Lindsay and Rayat moved to
Mar'an'cas."
"Why?"
"They're sitting on their arses in Fersanye's house
doing nothing and eating, and they ought to be earning their keep. They
can get their hands dirty with the colonists." Shan tapped at the
handheld, distracted. "And perhaps being stuck with a bunch of
god-botherers on a cold wet rock for a while will shake Rayat down. Or
get him to drop his guard to someone."
"But Lindsay Neville was never part of his operation,
was she?"
Shan shook her head.
"Do you wish to kill her?"
"Sometimes."
"Perhaps you have learned to dispense with pointless
revenge."
"I doubt it," said Shan.
Ual wondered if the defense forces of the
Northern Assembly might try to shoot down the ship before he had the
chance to make his case. And if they didn't, then the Maritime Fringe
might save them the trouble. It all depended on how keen they were to
call down the wrath of Eqbas Vorhi.
Esganikan Gai, who stood at the helm of a warship that
had somehow detached itself from the larger vessel, seemed unperturbed.
"Your forces have nothing that can penetrate this hull."
"Said an Eqbas spokesman," Eddie muttered, but very
quietly. He held a short sleeveless garment up against his chest. "Is
charcoal my color?"
"What is that?"
"A ballistic vest to stop projectiles putting a hole
through me. I know it works because it's Shan's and she said it stopped
an isenj round before." He fastened the vest down each side and flapped
his arms as if testing it for comfort. "It's too tight. Funny, she
always seemed to be built like an Amazon."
"I have yet to meet her," said Ual. He wondered if he
would ever get the chance now: he could imagine the reception he might
get in Jejeno. "I didn't believe Giyadas when she said she had
survived."
The distance between Wess'ej and Umeh was hours rather
than days, a bus ride as Eddie called it.
Esganikan's liquid fragment of warship began decelerating on its
approach to Umeh space. The interior of the ship was all fluid light
and shifting displays that took up all the bulkhead space, and the
Eqbas personnel were kneeling or sitting in small niches, looking more
as if they were meditating than standing by for possible attack.
Esganikan glanced at an unintelligible formation of
gold lights set in an amber cloud and passed her hand over it. "When we
encounter your defense systems, we will exercise caution."
"I thought you said they didn't have anything big
enough to take you out," said Eddie.
"I meant that we will avoid putting the Umeh armed
forces in a position where we have to retaliate and destroy them."
"Ah. I can see why that wouldn't get things off to a
good start."
It was a wise precaution. The long-range surveillance
net on both Umeh and Tasir Var would react to an alien vessel. They
were very old systems, created before isenj realized that wess'har
would make no attempt to attack them on their own territory--except
Asht, of course. Ual had given up thinking of the planet as Asht. He
accepted that it was now and always would be Bezer'ej. If others could
take that view, the isenj would be on their way to breaking their
dependence on a past that couldn't be recreated, and they might look
forward to a very different but easier future.
The image of Umeh was an ochre disk on the bulkhead.
Ual had now seen his homeworld from space twice, but he compared it
with the swirled blue and white surfaces of Wess'ej and Bezer'ej, and
even Earth. They all looked so much more inviting.
"Your ground command is warning us," said Esganikan. "Is there an
appropriate response?"
"Let me speak to them," said Ual.
It was not a Northern Assembly station but a Maritime
Fringe one that had detected the Eqbas ship. Surface Defense at Buyg
wanted the ship to turn back.
"I am Minister Par Paral Ual and I wish to land with a
delegation from Eqbas Vorhi," he said. Delegation
was an Eddie word, very weasel, and
nowhere near as alarming as warship. "We
require entry to Umeh airspace."
"You're a traitor on board an alien ship."
"The reality is a little more complicated than that.
Are you aware what might happen if Umeh was to carry out an unprovoked
hostile act against an Eqbas vessel? Or if the Maritime Fringe did, and
was the cause of hostilities that affected its neighbors?"
There was a pause. Ralassi, close at Ual's side, was
making little snap-snap-snap noises with
his teeth. "They won't fire on a vessel with ussissi on board. We would
stop crewing vessels for isenj if that happened."
"Power of the union, lads," said Eddie. His voice
vibrated uncharacteristically. "That's the spirit."
The Eqbas helmsman didn't look up. He said something in
eqbas'u that Ual couldn't follow and Esganikan turned her head to give
what seemed to be an order. The bridge crew moved instantly to
different positions.
"Let's not start firing," said Ual. "This can be worked
out peacefully--"
"We are landing," said Esganikan. "We know now what
your target acquisition technology is like and this ship has not been
targeted. Aitassi and Ralassi will talk to your ground stations and
identify a landing site for us."
"If I have any authority to land at all, it will be in
Northern Assembly territory, in Ebj." If I have
any authority… "If anything happens to me, the person you should
concentrate your persuasive skills upon is Minister Par Shomen Eit. His
responsibility is supplies, which is infrastructure and environment."
"I intend to speak to your whole Assembly."
She alarmed him. "I wish you would discuss these ideas
with me a little more in advance of executing them."
Esganikan stared back. "It makes no difference."
Eddie moved slowly forward to stare at the bulkhead
display, arms pressed in to his sides as if afraid the ballistic vest
would abandon him. Then he took his bee cam out of a pocket and let it
hover by his head. He said nothing.
"Is this a dangerous situation for you, Eddie?"
The journalist shrugged. "I've been in worse. And I
wasn't sitting behind an Eqbas cannon at the time." He glanced at
Esganikan. "Do you have cannon, by the way?"
She seemed almost indulgent. She actually patted
Eddie's arm, and he flinched. "If you mean heavy long-range weapons,
yes. If you feel vulnerable, you may stay in the ship when we land."
"You must be joking," said Eddie. "This is my bloody
story. I'm having it."
Esganikan might not have understood his colloquial
language but she appeared to detect something else, and patted his arm
again. Ual realized Eddie was afraid. His face was paler than usual and
he was breathing more rapidly, licking his lips. Ual wondered if he
enjoyed the tension or if he simply lived with it as soldiers did.
Either way, the human was right. There was plenty to
fear.
And Ual was completely alone. All isenj prized a little
solitude, a luxury in a crowded world, but this wasn't quite the
solitude Ual had in mind.
"I'll be right behind you," said Eddie.
Shan woke with a start and realized she was not
drifting somewhere between Bezer'ej and Umeh. She was in her own bed,
alive, well fed, and warm. The relief was wonderful.
"You stop breathing frequently," Aras whispered.
"Sorry. Does it bother you?"
"Not as long as I can still feel your heartbeat."
"Yeah, that's how I look at it." She buried her head in
the hollow of his shoulder and tried to doze again. "You still here?"
Wess'har slept in irregular short bursts: Aras would get up and wander
off several times during the night, something she had grown used to.
"Keeping an eye on me?"
"I thought you might be upset if you woke and I wasn't
here."
"Aww. Sweet."
"It's started."
"What has?"
"Recall of your memories."
"Oh."
She felt him swallow. "Most unpleasant."
"Try fucking awful."
"You're very resilient."
"Didn't have a lot of choice."
She started to drift off again, soothed by the
delicious scent of sandalwood and the suede-like feel of his skin. This
was bliss. She didn't need to be on her guard. She knew her gun was on
the table by the bed and it didn't matter that it was a little out of
reach. F'nar felt safe in a way that Earth never had.
He nudged her. "And am I forgiven for my reluctance to
mount you?"
"Aras, can we work on a bit of euphemism, please? Mounting
just doesn't do it for me."
"But you don't use
euphemism. You say--"
"I know what word I use. But mounting is a bit too… agricultural."
"Very well. But am I? Forgiven, that is?"
"I reckon."
"Promise me that you won't get involved in Esganikan's
missions. I would welcome some uneventful time with you."
It wasn't an unreasonable request. "Provided she
doesn't piss me about over the gene bank, I'll leave her to her own
devices. I'm not the cavalry any more. I know when I'm done."
Aras made a noncommittal rumble in his throat that
might have been either approval or disbelief. She shut her eyes again
and rearranged his arm into a more comfortable position for her head;
the rumble turned into that purr with its undertone of infrasonics,
ebbing and flowing, soothing her just as it would calm a wess'har
infant. The outside world receded. She sank into a blanket of endless,
blurred gold.
"What if it had been Rayat?" The purr trailed off.
Oh, please. The gold haze
evaporated. "What if what had been Rayat?"
"If you had infected him. Would you have felt the same
pity and…obligation?"
"Oh, come on." She rolled
over on her back. She was wide awake again. "No. Not even with a bag
over his head. I'd have given him a grenade and told him to do the
decent thing." She got up and checked her swiss: it was still four
hours to sunrise and 2318 Western FEU time, as if that mattered to her
body clock any longer. "I know what this is about. You want a
house-brother, don't you?"
"Yes."
Poor sod. He'd coped with
his condition on Bezer'ej, but being surrounded by ordinary wess'har
again seemed to have made him more desperate for normality. She
wondered how long it would be before he became broody. But a remedy for
that longing would always be completely out of the question in so many
ways, and she wasn't even going to mention it.
"Look, if you and Ade want to sort out some
arrangement, go ahead." Yes, go on. Save me
having to make the decision for once. "If that's the way you
both want it, I'll be perfectly happy."
"That's very wess'har of you."
"There's a lot of me that is."
Liar. That was one part
of her that wasn't. Her brain said one at a time,
girl. She was appalled at herself for even looking at Ade, and
she did, oh yes she did. She'd looked at him that way for a long time.
It might have been normal and even commendable for wess'har, but a
voice inside kept yelling slut, slut, slut.
Of course polyandry was okay for wess'har: they were…animals.
And that was another thought she didn't like, and it
was equally unbidden. If there was anyone who should have had the most
open of minds about nonhuman species, it was her, and here she was
relegating wess'har into the category of not like
us.
She really didn't have an us
any longer. The us consisted of Aras Sar
Iussan and Ade Bennett and her. She now had more in common with the
yodeling sea horses in the city below and even with the microscopic
organisms she had sifted between her fingers on Ouzhari than she had
with the monkeys whose worst attitudes still rose up in her when she
least expected it.
"When are you going to see the bezeri?" Aras had taken
the news of their request in silence. She wondered if he didn't want to
leave her on her own with Ade after all. "I could come with you."
"No need," said Aras. "I shall talk to them. I'll leave
tomorrow."
He didn't sound happy about it. But that wasn't
surprising. There was no comfort he could give them, and apologies were
worse than useless.
Outcomes were all that mattered, and Shan couldn't
think of any happy endings for the bezeri.
We approve of
your decision to limit human endeavor to your own system. But your poor
relations with other species on Earth make us believe that the common
interest still needs our intervention. You appear to be familiar with
the concept of third party arbitration and peacekeeping. Our current
timetable and intentions stand.
CURAS TI
senior matriarch of Surang and speaker for Eqbas Vorhi in
off-world matters,
in a message to the United Nations
Ade crouched down to look Serrimissani in
her hostile black eyes and handed her the sheet of smartpaper. "This is
the best I can do, mate," he said. "Rigger's would be best, high
combats if not. I'll be really grateful."
Serrimissani studied the traced outline of the sole of
a boot and gave Ade the sort of look that he'd seen her give Eddie. He
felt stupid. But he'd promised Shan he'd get her some replacement
boots, good solid ones, and he was going to do it. Barencoin and
Qureshi watched him suspiciously. The Exchange of Surplus Things had
become the nearest thing they had to a mess and when they weren't on
crop duties they hung around here, and he wished they wouldn't.
"I will do my best," said Serrimissani. Ussissi seemed
not to find it demeaning to run errands. "If I have to barter for this,
what do I offer?"
Ussissi were new to haggling. Ade couldn't help
thinking they would end up being bloody good at it. They always had
their walk-away point and you couldn't manipulate them. He fumbled in
all the pockets on his shirt and in his pants, and then in his belt
pouch, but there wasn't much. The sum total of his negotiable wealth
was his fighting knife, his mother's wedding ring, and his medals. That
wouldn't be worth much to anyone in Umeh Station. A few kilos of prime
steak would have done the deal a lot better.
No, not the ring. He
turned the medals in his palm. Barencoin grunted and stepped between
him and Serrimissani. "Aw, for fuck's sake, Sarge, not your medals."
"They're not worth anything out here."
"She doesn't need the boots that badly. She's got
boots. Jesus, all this on the off chance
she'll give you a leg-over? You sad bastard."
"Piss off, Mart."
Qureshi pitched in, always the sensible older sister
breaking up a fight between the boys. "Come on, they're his and he can
do what he likes with them. Lay off him."
"I can't for the life of me think what you see in that
bird, I really can't." Barencoin did one of his theatrical eye-rolls of
exasperation. "I mean, I know you're not going to get it anywhere else,
but you're not much use to her now she's had a bit of wess'har, are
you? Not with one dick."
Ade tried very hard not to be his father, always
solving his problems with his fists. He was still the bloody sergeant
here whether they'd dismissed him or not. He lowered his voice. "I said
I'd get her the boots, so I will. And you can wind your neck
in, okay?"
"Suit yourself," said Barencoin, and walked off.
Serrimissani studied the medals and handed them back.
When her paw brushed Ade's hand it felt like corduroy, all soft little
ridges, but she couldn't have been less like a toy if she'd tried. Her
teeth looked like serious business.
"I will find a way to acquire the boots without
barter," she said. "And Marine Barencoin is wrong. From what I have
seen of Shan Frankland, she will take pity on you and grant you sexual
favors whether you offer her boots or not. She has a strong sense of jask."
There were some things a bloke didn't need to hear, and
pity was one of them. Qureshi steered him
into a quiet corner and sat down on an empty crate.
"You okay?"
"Yeah."
"You sure you know what you're doing? We don't want to
see you get hurt. Emotionally, I mean, because it's not like getting a
good hiding from Aras is going to make much difference to you."
"I'm not doing anything. I'm just looking out for her."
"Right."
"She reminds me of my mum."
"Christ, Ade, you never actually told her that, did
you?"
"Yes."
"You should never tell a woman she reminds you of your
mum. Not even if your mum was Helen of Troy."
"I meant that she's not afraid of anything and she
makes me feel safe."
"Well, if you didn't make that clear to her, the boots
aren't going to get you very far."
"I'm not getting her boots for that."
He really shouldn't have mentioned his mother. He could see that now.
"So what would work, then?"
Qureshi's expression was that of someone trying to
break bad news. "You could always just ask her."
"Izzy, you're not going to take the piss out of me, are
you?"
"No, Sarge. She's not that
much older than you. And she doesn't look it."
"Thanks a lot."
"I've said the wrong thing, haven't I?"
"Think what you like." He occupied himself with his
belt, sheathing his fighting knife with exaggerated care. "I can trust
her."
Qureshi didn't ask him to explain. They all knew he'd
had unrelenting bad luck in his love life. They thought he was bloody
soft with women, a pushover, a mug. Maybe he was, but he didn't know
how to be anything else.
"What's the Boss planning to do with Neville and
Rayat?" said Qureshi.
So she thought of Shan as the top of the command chain,
too. We all need structure. "She still
wants information out of Rayat, but I haven't a clue what she wants to
do with Neville."
"I thought she would have jobbed her by now." Qureshi
mimicked Shan's two-handed gun grip. "And that tosser Rayat."
"You know they've found some bezeri survivors, don't
you?"
"Yeah. Not much comfort for them, I shouldn't think."
"I'd ask them what they wanted done with the bastards."
"What if they want all of us
strung up?"
Ade hadn't thought of that. He'd started to accept
Shan's view--and the prevailing wess'har opinion--that the marines
weren't responsible for the destruction of Ouzhari.
But it didn't feel true.
"I could have told Lindsay Neville to fuck off," said
Ade. "What's the worst she could have done? What's the worst Rayat
could have done? Had us court-martialed."
"We could all have
refused, Ade. You might be the sergeant, but we were all capable of
saying no and we just obeyed orders."
"And we should have known better."
"You've seen more action than the rest of us. How many
times have you thought, oh, sod this for a game of soldiers, I'm not
doing that? We all think it and we don't act on it. That's why we're in
uniform and civvies aren't, because if you argue the toss every time
you can't fight."
"Yeah, and wess'har don't give a shit what your motives
are, just what the end result is." He could see Barencoin making his
way back down the Exchange, shuffling a pack of cards as he walked. He
really didn't fancy a game now. He was troubled: he needed to talk to
someone who'd done something unthinkable and had learned to live with
it. "I've got to see Aras about something. I'll catch up with you
later."
Barencoin slapped the cards against his palm to align
the pack and held it out to Ade. "Gin rummy?"
"Nah, got things to do."
"Okay, I was well out of order there. Sorry. Now can we
play?"
"I meant it. There's something I've got to sort out."
Barencoin didn't look as if he believed him. Ade didn't
think Mart would spend a second worrying about what he'd done; or maybe
he was like Shan, just good at looking as if he didn't. When he got
back to the house--and he wondered why he thought of it as a house and
not a cave--there was no sign of Shan. Aras was sitting on the terrace,
Shan's swiss balanced on one thigh and Rayat's handheld on the other,
the devices linked by a wire. A few shafts of pink late afternoon light
pierced the cloud and gave one pearl face of the city a rosy luster.
"Isan has gone to see
Nevyan," said Aras, not looking up. "I have been examining Rayat's
handheld."
"Anything?"
"Nothing further. In the end, not having a named
individual will not prevent Eqbas Vorhi intervening. It's simply a
matter of detail."
"Can I talk to you?"
"If this is about Shan, we have discussed that enough."
"Actually, it's about Mjat."
Aras put the two devices down on the flagstones and
beckoned Ade to him. "Are you having unpleasant flashbacks?"
"No. Well, yes, but it's not about that."
"What do you want to know, then?"
"How I came to roll over and just ship those bombs to
Bezer'ej because I was ordered to. I never thought I was a bad bloke
and now I just don't know any more."
"Have you followed orders before?"
"You know I have. I'm a marine."
"And how did you feel then?"
"I went where they sent me, and my targets were always
ones who'd shoot me if I didn't shoot them." You had to be able to stop
thinking about it after you'd fired. Most blokes couldn't in the end.
Ade found women were much better at killing and moving on. "But c'naatat
wasn't doing me any harm and neither
were the bezeri."
"Humans follow orders, especially if conditioned to do
so."
"I know. I know all that.
But when you bombed Mjat, the isenj weren't a threat to you personally.
So how do you handle it?"
For all Aras's human characteristics, he still had his
unshakeable wess'har clarity when it came to cause and effect. "They
were a threat to the bezeri. They wouldn't stop polluting the planet."
"But how do you feel about it now?"
"I regret that I had to do it and I would do it again."
"So how should I feel about Ouzhari?"
"You know how you feel about it. You feel guilty. The
question is whether you are guilty." Aras
reached out and took hold of Ade's wrist, a loose grip, apparently
unthinking. Ade braced his muscles involuntarily and had to remind
himself that wess'har were touchers and huggers: there was nothing
weird about it. But he still wasn't comfortable with another bloke
touching his hand. "For wess'har to consider you guilty of causing
bezeri deaths, you would have had to arm the devices. And you did not."
"I helped get the ordnance there. Lindsay Neville would
never have managed it without us."
"And if you had a human lawyer, he would argue that you
thought you were transporting neutron devices to an island without
animal life, and that you had every expectation that the explosion
would create minimal environmental effects beyond a few days."
"What's the word for that? Sophistry."
"And if you had known they were cobalt devices, and
Commander Neville had not set them to detonate, would you be guilty
even though no deaths resulted?"
"Yeah. I would. It'd be like conspiracy to murder."
"Our two species have different views of reality."
It didn't help him at all. It muddied the waters.
Perhaps that was an answer. Both sets of logic made sense in themselves
but not side by side, and in the end it was the gut feeling that events
produced that made guilt or innocence.
But Ade had a better idea of what he was feeling now.
He was a kid at home again, not standing up to his violent father, not
doing what he should have done. Aras let go of his wrist.
"You don't always follow orders," he said. "Shan said
you held a gun on Commander Neville to stop her using the grenades."
"Yeah, and you know what happened next."
"Move on."
"I'm trying. It's funny how good and evil get harder to
spot as you get older. I wish I had Shan's sense of black and white."
"It was part of her job to have one. And good and evil
are concepts best left to the colonists. I prefer to think in terms of
what I will personally tolerate and what I will not."
"How do you think the colonists fit that in with a god
who's supposed to have a plan?"
"Does your god receive in packets?"
"Sorry?"
"Prayer. Perhaps God receives data in packets, like
your communication systems once did. Or maybe prayers are heard only by
the praying, which is perhaps more useful." Aras seemed distracted by
the ideas. "If God is omniscient, why does he need prayer to make him
aware of the things troubling people? And if he is
aware, why are humans so presumptuous as to ask him to change events
for them? Has he no firm plan for the universe? I asked Ben all these
things, and Josh too, but they said I needed faith."
For a being with absolutely no concept of the divine,
this was a twenty-four-carat piece of theology. Ade savored the moment
of strangeness brought on by watching a pink pearl sunset with an alien
brother in a caldera 150 trillion miles from home.
But there were no packets of prayers, and no god, and
nobody was waiting for him at the Pearly Gates with a tally sheet of
his sins. He wasn't going to die, and the only pearly gates were right
here, and real.
Whatever peace he reached with himself would take some
work.
"Fuck faith," said Ade. "It's as bad as following
orders."
Boom.
The Eqbas vessel shivered slightly, causing several
bridge crew to bob their heads. Ual found himself looking at an aerial
view of Jejeno that spanned most of the bulkhead in front of him. A
trail of vapor plumed up from the city and seemed to arc straight into
his face, confirmation that something had been fired at the warship.
Esganikan tilted her head side to side but she seemed
perfectly calm. Aitassi and Ralassi were not. They were seething, teeth
bared, and Ralassi had taken over the communications position in front
of the bulkhead. Ual found it hard to see how it was operated. There
were no controls that he could identify, just an illuminated panel the
size of a plate that moved when Ralassi did.
"You fired upon ussissi," he said. "This has never
happened before and it will not be tolerated. We will no longer fly
your vessels. You will cease firing now."
There was absolute silence from the Jejeno ground
station. Ralassi was right: nobody had ever fired on a vessel knowing
ussissi were on board. The isenj were reliant on them as nonmilitary
pilots and interpreters between isenj regions. But then no alien vessel
had ever breached Umeh's airspace uninvited. The old protocols and
assumptions had crumbled in a matter of minutes.
Jejeno looked as it always had. Its intricate towers
and forests of bronze and brown buildings glittered in the afternoon
light, and another vapor trail rose from the ground. This time there
was no gentle shiver as the missile was deflected by the Eqbas vessel.
It never reached them.
"God, it looks just like tracer fire," said Eddie,
wandering up and down the bridge behind his bee cam. Ual watched and
felt his courage begin to abandon him.
Then Eqbas Vorhi ran out of patience.
Bursts of yellow light stabbed a neat and precise path
down to the vapor trail and the bulkhead dimmed the light from the
explosion. Then a bright green beam picked out a target in the city
below and a streak of reflected light flashed down it. Fire spread out
from the point of impact and black smoke roiled up above the tops of
the buildings.
Esganikan considered the image on the bulkhead. The
view changed to a closer shot and Ual could see a crater fringed by
twisted frames and shattered blocks of buildings.
"The point from which you launch your air defenses has
been destroyed," she said calmly, as if she had done this many times
before. "I see no point in causing more destruction than is necessary
and we will not fire again unless there is another attack. Talk to your
colleagues and explain that I would like to speak to the Northern
Assembly today." She turned and took a few
slow paces down the length of the bridge, her plume of red fur bobbing
as she walked, and reached out to touch the bulkhead image of the only
open space in Jejeno--its port landing fields. "I will wait. Now, helm,
take us down."
"Shit," said Eddie.
Ual wondered if Esganikan had any comprehension of what
followed when an explosion occurred in a densely populated city. If she
did, then she showed no sign of anxiety about it. But he knew. He could
imagine what was happening now and he was terrified.
Beneath them, water conduits would be flooding the
streets. Homes, food production centers and offices ran right up to the
walls of the defense station building, and they would have collapsed.
Fires would be spreading. There would be no water to extinguish them
because the pressure in the water supply would have plummeted. And
there would be panic and crushing, fleeing crowds and many, many
civilian deaths.
Eddie seemed to see his thoughts. "We'd call that fish in a
barrel," he said. "Nowhere to run."
"That describes the situation for us all," said Ual.
They were attempting to bury Jonathan Burgh
when Lindsay and Rayat arrived on Mar'an'cas.
Lindsay's trousers were soaked up to the knee.
Barencoin and Becken had been in a hurry to deliver their prisoners to
the colonists and she'd stepped from the boat into deeper water than
she anticipated.
Rayat watched the burial party of colonists trying to
dig in the thin soil. "No carrion-eating life on the island, I take it?"
Barencoin shrugged, chivvying him along like a
sheepdog. "We're all carrion-eaters to the wess'har."
"Shall we give them a hand?" Lindsay asked. "I think
they're going to have to pile rocks."
"You do what you like," said Barencoin. "We're persona
non shit-pot with the colony."
He turned back down the path, Becken close behind him.
James Garrod came down from the camp and grunted for Lindsay and Rayat
to follow him.
"We haven't got much here," said James. Lindsay walked
through the camp of oddly decorative tents, wary of a hostile response.
People seemed subdued but purposeful. "And even if we're going home to
Earth, we've still got a few years to wait out. So you pull your weight
for the time you're here."
Rayat had somehow managed to grab a small bag of
personal effects before he was dragged out of Umeh Station. He hitched
it higher on his shoulder and Lindsay wondered if she could talk him
into letting her borrow a fresh shirt. "No problem," he said to James.
He seemed in his personablemode, probably grooming the colonists for
some act of sympathy that would benefit him. "We'll do whatever you
need."
James showed them to a tent. It seemed they'd have to
share. Lindsay's distaste must have shown on her face.
"We don't do private suites," he said. "Will you be
coming to services?"
It took her a few moments to work out that he meant worship.
"I'm not sure I believe in God," she
said. Rayat was carefully silent.
"Well, he's there, and you might as well start getting
to know him before you go to him," said James. The kid said it with
such casual certainty that her stomach tightened involuntarily. "You'll
have a lot to talk to him about."
James walked away. Rayat tried the thin mattress on the
floor and sat down cross-legged, hands folded in his lap. Lindsay
wished for a change of clothing and an end to the new doubt that was
starting to overtake her.
"Since I left Earth, I've taken more beatings than I
did even in training," said Rayat. "My job's not usually this violent."
Is death really going to be the
end of it? Am I ever going to have peaceful oblivion? "I noticed
you don't fight back. Ever."
"No point fighting unless you're trying to escape or
survive," he said. "Save it for when you really need it."
"And you don't really need it now?"
"I've never been this close to death before."
"Really?"
"Really."
She wasn't sure if she believed him. He appeared
completely drained of motivation and color. So even a spook had his
limits: it seemed that exhaustion and inevitability had finally ground
him down as well.
"You're resigned to what's coming, then?"
Rayat made a distracted click with his teeth. "I know
what you think of me, but I find it as hard as you do to come to terms
with what we did."
"There's no we in this,
you bastard. You loaded the cobalt primers in the ERDs, not me."
For once Rayat didn't argue. "I know."
"And all for nothing. Ade Bennett's infected and Shan's
walking around large as life."
"Bennett?"
"I never told you in case you got stupid ideas again."
"Bennett?" The odd amalgam
of revelation and dismay on his face was priceless. "Shit. Shit."
"So we destroyed a sentient species for nothing."
"You think I feel good about that?" She could have
sworn he was genuinely anguished. "Okay, I've done things in my career
that most people would find nauseating. But my priority is the welfare
of my country, and I'm prepared to do
whatever it takes to ensure that."
"Well, at least you admit it."
"Oh, I'll do more than admit
it. I'd do it again."
"Why does that not surprise me?"
"Look, girlie, we don't live in a cost-free universe.
We get our hands dirty just by living day to day." Girlie.
That was Shan's dismissive term for her, too. Rayat had come as close
to sincerity as Lindsay had ever seen, and it was disturbing: he was
suddenly angry. "So, what if some states
on Earth got hold of c'naatat, and we
didn't? You think that's not worth paying
a high price to avoid? If not for Europe, then for Earth? You
must have thought it was, at least enough to
use nukes."
"Some prices are just too high."
"And how many nice people get killed because they
happen to be in the bad guy's army? There are always
prices to pay and there's always an innocent bystander, but you can't
let that stop you. You know something? I'd kill Frankland without a
second thought, but at least she understands the stakes and she's got
the balls to live with what she does. I'm not even sure we're after
different things, either."
"For all her faults, she wouldn't have risked a
species."
"Unless they're humans."
Lindsay hated him, and his logic, and his contempt, all
of which reminded her more of Shan than she could tolerate. Both had
the same total, ruthless focus. They did dirty jobs: they risked their
lives anonymously for their obsessive principles. And yet she couldn't
see them as the same species as herself.
She shifted tack, worrying what her own motives truly
were. "You going to go to have a talk with God, then? See what deal you
can sort out with him?"
"I'm not a Christian."
"Neither am I. Well, not practicing."
"How do you cope?"
"I don't. I wish there was something I could do to make
amends but it's a tall order, putting genocide right again."
Rayat tipped the contents of his bag out on the bed.
His worldly goods consisted of two gray shirts, some unidentifiable
balled-up fabric and a wallet. He sighed quietly. "What would we all
give to turn back time, eh?"
"Pretty well everything," said Lindsay. "Everything."
Withdraw your
vessel from our planet or face the consequences.
Priority message from Minister PAR NIR
BEDOI Northern Assembly, to Nevyan Tan Mestin
It was cold and the bezeri who nestled in
the rocks off the coastline of St. Chad's island didn't know Aras at
all.
They knew what he was, though.
He held the lamp and signaled to them, speaking wess'u
for the lamp to shape into a language of color. You
asked for me.
The rocks sparkled with concentric circles of pulsing
yellow light that radiated from four or five central points. The bezeri
slowly peeled away from the hiding place, hanging in the water a little
way from him with their tentacles trailing in the current. Aras put his
other hand out to steady himself.
One of them spoke. The lights on her mantle--the same
lights that lived in Shan's hands--flared into complex patterns of red,
green and blue that the lamp converted to sound.
So it's true. You are the
creature that can live both here and in the Dry Above with equal ease,
the one that never dies. One of those who saved us from the polluters.
I am, saidAras. But
I made mistakes and your people died.
Who did this to us?
He would tell them the exact truth. The generic gethes
would mean nothing to them. Like
wess'har, they were specific. Humans who came
here. We have already killed two as an act of balance.
Are there others who are guilty?
Yes. What justice do you require
for this?
We want them balanced too. And
we will do this ourselves. We want all of those who brought this
destruction upon us.
Bezeri didn't have that clear wess'har definition of
responsibility any more than humans did. Aras knew they would include
Qureshi and Barencoin and Chahal in that category--and Ade.
This was one occasion when the truth would serve no
purpose. For the first time in his life, Aras lied like a gethes.
He didn't lie by omission, as he had
done with difficulty before. He lied,
completely and totally.
There are only two of them. A
female called Lindsay Neville and a male called Mohan Rayat.
Bring them to us.
I will.
There is one more thing.
The bezeri took on her colors of quiet consideration, light blue
rhythmic pulses. It was a while before she spoke. There
are too few of us. We need to rebuild, to recover what is left of our
culture and our history. We said we did not want the help of aliens,
but times are hard.
Bezeri had a powerful sense of place. Being rooted in
the coastal waters of these islands made them vulnerable, as did their
fragile biochemistry. They cared about their clans and their
territories and they kept detailed records. Faced with destruction,
they needed to find comfort in their past exactly as humans did. It was
ironic.
I will get you that help,
said Aras, thinking of the Eqbas scientists.
We mean you. We want you to
return to us. You can live among us.
Aras wondered if he had misunderstood. Among
you?
The lights rippled, both fascinating and desperate. You cannot
drown. You can survive anywhere.
Aras's wess'har candor almost betrayed him, but he bit
back a refusal. His mind was filled with selfish preoccupations: he had
an isan and a brother now. There was a
time when he might have conquered his dislike of immersion and sought
escape with the bezeri, but that time was long gone, and he was ashamed
that his first instinct was to abandon them again.
That will be difficult,
said Aras.
You said you would be there for
us. You promised.
And so he had. Give me time to
think.
A male bezeri at the back of the group came forward and
reached into his mantle with one tentacle. He drew out a small flat
oval and extended it towards Aras.
It was the ancient azin
shell map that Aras had once owned. The shell was as transparent as
glass and the bezeri had once made these beautiful complex maps by
compressing colored patterns of sand between the layers of shell. Aras
had given it to Shan, and she had returned it to the bezeri with one
addition: a thin line of red sand, sprinkled carefully like a border,
her way of telling them that she planned to protect them from
outsiders. She called it her exclusion zone.
But it hadn't quite worked out. He took the map from
the outstretched tentacle.
Why are you returning this?
Aras asked.
Give it to the female who gave
it back to us. Tell her that her red line did not hold.
But she tried very hard.
It was not enough.
Aras grasped the tether that reached down from the niluyghur
and twisted it, the map tucked tightly
to his chest. The line drew him slowly up through the water and he
watched the lights dwindle beneath him. One of the Eqbas crew caught
him by his tunic and hauled him inboard, watching fascinated as he
coughed up the seawater from his lungs and shook himself dry.
He cradled the azin map in
both hands all the way back to the ship, remembering all the times he
had sat alone in his own vessel on Constantine and studied its contour
lines.
Tell her that her red line did
not hold.
Shan knew that already. And she hadn't failed them: he had,
right from the time he had allowed the
Constantine mission to survive.
Now the bezeri were asking for his help again. Aras
thought of the concepts of sin and forgiveness and mercy
that Ben Garrod had taught him about nearly two hundred years ago, and
he remembered another one: atonement.
The Pajat coast, Wessej.
"I need some normal human DNA," said Shapakti.
"Don't look at me," said Shan. "Have you tried Eddie?
Journalists share ninety-nine percent of DNA with humans."
"That is humor."
"You're catching on." The glass raft neared Mar'an'cas,
skimming over a relatively calm sea. Clouds threatened to empty
themselves any minute, and Shan wasn't sure if the raft was watertight
from the top. Ade sat cross-legged aft of them, if the raft's layout
could be described in nautical terms. "I expect you can get plenty from
the colonists. You're almost in their good books for helping them
fulfill their religious duty."
"Are they normal humans?"
"Apart from the fact they're as mad as a box of frogs,"
Ade muttered. "That's normal too."
Shan walked around the transparent deck, never having
learned the sailor's discipline of not compromising the trim of the
craft. Ade, frowning slightly, looked as if he disapproved.
"They're normal in the sense that most humans who could
afford health care were genetically manipulated in some way, and that
was the stock they came from," she said. "But I come from a Pagan
family. They wouldn't have any truck with genetic interference, so my
DNA was pretty well wild Homo sapiens."
"And this is what F'nar used to engineer the antihuman
pathogen."
"Yes. They had a sample of my hair from the time before
I caught c'naatat."
"As wide a range of specimens as possible would suit my
purposes."
Shapakti had no hidden agendas; wess'har never did, as
literal and unthinkingly frank as small children.
"And what are your
purposes, then?"
"I would like to see if it is possible to stop humans
becoming host to c'naatat."
That sounded sensible enough. But Shan's old ingrained
misgivings about biological research began to nag at her. It was a
little late for that, given that her DNA was currently doing a decent
razor-wire job in quarantining Bezer'ej. It had certainly worked bloody
well on the family in the church. She was aware of Ade staring at her.
"I don't like experiments," she said.
Shapakti appeared to understand her a lot better than
she thought he did. "I only need to record a profile of cells. Then I
can use models to explore the possibilities."
"And you developed that expertise on yourselves, eh?"
"Yes."
"Just checking."
"I can see why you doubt us. Life on your planet
developed through competition. Ours developed largely through
cooperation, symbiosis and sustainable equilibrium. Would you like to
visit Eqbas Vorhi?"
She wondered what the payload from Thetis
would have made of that. "Yes, I would. One day."
The raft beached and they stepped ashore. Ade kept
glancing back at the vessel as if he didn't quite believe it. As they
walked into Constantine camp with its bizarre jacquard tents and
pervading smell of human waste, the marine slipped his rifle off its
webbing and cradled it across his chest, looking worryingly prepared.
Shan thought she'd be jumpy if she'd been stoned. She had faced a hail
of missiles far too many times in her police career to take a
restrained and sympathetic view of public disorder, and reached down
her spine to the back of her belt to feel the comforting smooth grip of
her 9mm. Shapakti stared.
"Yeah, you bet I'd use
it," she said, anticipating his question and silencing it.
The colonists were about their business, mainly digging
and shifting soil around in small barrows. They glanced up at Shan's
party and then went back to their tasks. They were making deeper soil
beds for crops, gathering up the thin top-soil of Mar'an'cas.
"It's a lot calmer," said Ade, but he still cradled his
rifle and checked around him as he walked. "They can focus on going
home now."
"Sooner the better," said Shan. "I'm going to find
Rayat. Shapakti, you stick with me and we'll get you some samples."
"I'll stick around too," said Ade.
"Look, you know you wouldn't shoot an unarmed
civilian." She couldn't be angry with him for being stiflingly
protective. Nobody had ever given a shit about her safety before, not
even when she was vulnerable to injury. It felt good. "But I
can, believe me."
But Ade still trailed behind her, just the way she'd
seen little wess'har boys trailing after an isanket,
happy to submit to matriarchy.
Rayat was working when she found him. He'd never struck
her as a man who liked getting his hands dirty, but then he'd never
seemed to be a spy either; and she didn't usually get it that wrong. He
was in one of the transparent composite crop tunnels, shoveling the
contents of an old latrine over freshly dug soil. Ade stood at the
entrance like a sentry and Shapakti followed her inside. The enclosed
space concentrated the aroma wonderfully.
"You got five minutes?" said Shan.
Rayat looked up, still scattering the dark, crumbling
mass. "I was expecting you to make some humorous comment about shit and
my presence."
"I don't have a sense of humor. Fancy helping out a
fellow scientist?"
"How?"
"Skin sample. Won't hurt a bit." She beckoned over her
shoulder. "This is my chum Da Shapakti. Hold your arm out for him."
"What's in it for me?"
"Unbroken legs."
Shapakti put on his forensic glove and held up his
forefinger like a proctologist; Rayat rolled back his sleeve. Maybe he
didn't want to lose face in front of her.
"I'm glad your little EVA experience didn't affect your
charm." Shapakti touched his arm and withdrew. Rayat looked slightly
surprised. "Is that all you came for?"
"Here's your handheld."
"Found what you were looking for?"
"No." She was up against a pro in the interrogation
game here. Rayat was even sharper than Eddie so she prepared a feint.
"But in the absence of a named individual who gave you orders to cobalt
Ouzhari, the Eqbas will probably fry the whole FEU when they get there."
It wasn't like that at all, but she lied anyway.
"I can see why you identify with them so strongly."
"Don't try playing the conscience card. It just pisses
me off."
"And don't try to shock a name out of me. I don't much
care what happens to politicians, especially ones who haven't even been
elected yet."
Shan caught sight of her reflection on the
taut-stretched surface of the composite, slightly distorted but all too
detailed: not quite herself yet, too thin, too weak. She braced her
shoulders. It was time to lob a pebble into the information pond, a
trick she'd seen Eddie play too. She knew Perault. She could guess that
if someone knew about c'naatat enough to
brief Rayat, then Perault might know about it, and Perault's religious
views would give her a very interesting take on microscopic eternal
life. Shan had seen how the colonists behaved when confronted with it.
"I wondered if Perault thought c'naatat
was her Christian afterlife." She gambled in her best throwaway tone,
keeping her eyes fixed on Rayat's handheld. His scent said he was
anxious. "Perhaps the idea of seeing God in a culture dish didn't quite
do it for her, though."
She flickered her gaze as if she was trying not
to look at the handheld. Rayat said nothing.
"Come on. Anyone you name is going to be long gone by
the time the Eqbas get to Earth. Esganikan really wants to know."
I'm just thinking aloud.
"Nice try," said Rayat.
Ouch. "Can't blame a girl
for trying."
"Like you said, it won't make any difference who
authorized what." He smiled to himself, but it wasn't aimed at her.
Either way, it was the sort of smile she liked to knock off people's
faces the hard way. "You know Perault. She was obsessed with c'naatat.
But she also understood that it was
dangerous."
No, I had no idea she even knew
it existed. She conned me. Fucking bitch. Shan felt abandoned,
used, violated. "Did she really want it destroyed, though?" Steady.
Don't blow this. His scent's getting stronger.
"I reckon she lost her nerve."
"Yes, the gene bank ploy was clever, especially given
the time she had to set it up. I really thought that was the genuine
mission for a while and that mine was the
bluff."
Your priority is Constantine and
its planet, nothing else. Perault, pious and intense, gave her
the briefing anew.
Doubt wasn't just nibbling away at Shan. It had started
gulping down whole chunks. This was the point at which she threw in her
real fears, suddenly grateful for her wess'har capacity to stand very
still. "She knew I'd go for it. It was just a way of getting me here to
make sure nothing happened to her Christian buddies. She didn't give a
shit about Bezer'ej."
Rayat shrugged. "You've played this game before, just
as I have. I wonder what elaborate cover briefing she'd have made up if
the nearest foot soldier to hand hadn't been you?"
Shan found she could now control the involuntary
dilation of her pupils. She concentrated on the sensation in her throat
and jaw. She had to. Her stomach fell like a trapdoor opening on a
scaffold.
"That's politicians for you," she said.
This was the onion-skinned conversation: Rayat knew she
was interrogating him. Both were aware of the bluff and counterbluff
but neither was sure where the layer of reality might be. It was
distraction questioning, trying one topic to ease the suspect into
answers before you switched to what you really wanted to know and they
fell into the pit. He knew she did that. He probably thought he was
smarter than her, though. He was probably enjoying telling her how
Perault had set her up.
"Sure you don't want to name Cobalt Man?" said Shan,
struggling with betrayal. "Last chance."
"Some things I take to my grave," he said. Spies had
long been proven to be the most accomplished liars, able to control
their reactions. But she was part wess'har, and she smelled the relief
roll off him. He'd swallowed her line. "Talking of which, you're
probably thinking up a suitable denouement for me."
"No, I'll leave that to Esganikan. Or the bezeri." She
revealed it on a whim, but like all her gut reactions it had its roots
in practiced strategy. "Yes, they found a few survivors."
Rayat's scent reaction was acid surprise. Good.
Ade wandered up to her and stood in front
of Shapakti, who looked welded to the spot.
"Want to go now, Boss? I can't stand the smell of shit
any more."
"Wait outside, Ade." She'd found out what she needed to
know. And she wanted to show Rayat that she could beat him at his own
game. Childish: but she was a child again
right then, hurt and lied to by the grown-ups. Perault had conned her,
just as everyone said she had: but for entirely different reasons, for
trivial, make-believe, religious reasons.
There was no government plan to break the agricorp
cartel on patented food crops. She had been uprooted and sent 150
trillion miles from home because she was convenient and expendable.
It didn't even have anything to do with keeping
Perault's terrorist sister, Helen Marchant, out of the frame.
But Shan still had the gene bank. And now she had
powerful alien friends who could do something with it, so it was going
back to Earth to bust the agricorps and their ilk. Her only regret now
was that Perault was long dead and she'd never be able to see the shock
on her face when she actually completed the mission. People who thought
she was just another plod always got a nasty surprise.
And that included Rayat. Now suck
on this, you smug bastard.
"I might as well tell you," she said. "C'naatat
survived on Ouzhari too, and Ade's got
a dose. I'm sorry your journey was wasted."
A scent-burst of anxiety. Oh,
this is good. "I know about Ade."
"Okay, ask Shapakti about what he found on Ouzhari.
Wess'har aren't very good liars."
Shapakti, ever literal, opened his mouth to speak but
Rayat held up his hand to silence him. "Jesus, Frankland, I hope you've
got a bloody good plan for keeping this thing out of human reach."
"I haven't, but Eqbas Vorhi has," she said. "And I'll
go along with theirs."
She didn't stop to study Rayat's face. She walked out
of the tunnel, reassured that she still had the edge and ashamed at
giving in to professional vanity. Operation Green Rage was fresh in her
mind again: she had kept her collusion with the eco-terrorists to
herself, playing the incompetent right to the end, even when she was
busted for letting them get away. She'd swallowed the humiliation. You
did it because it mattered, not so you could let
everyone know how fucking noble you were. She still felt
cheated. That was what she didn't like.
She realized that she didn't like being made to look a fool, and she
wanted so much to be above those petty concerns.
Terrible events were sweeping whole worlds. Shan
Frankland's personal anxieties meant nothing.
Ade caught her arm hard enough to jerk her back. "Whoa,
Boss. What's wrong?"
"Just doing a bit of growing up."
"Does it really matter why Perault sent you here? Isn't
it what happens that matters?"
"Very wess'har. That obvious, is it?"
"I know when you're upset."
"The bitch lost her nerve about the Suppressed Briefing
she'd given Rayat and she used me to salve her conscience over the
fucking colony, to make sure they weren't touched. She manipulated my
green sympathies to get me out here. I fell for it."
"She SB'd you."
"A Suppressed Briefing isn't brainwashing, remember.
You can say no. She needed me to say yes because there was nobody else
she could send at the time, when she had to."
"So what's pissing you off? Just getting picked because
you were the nearest thing to hand, and not because you were better
than anyone else? Or being lied to by a politician? Happens to us
all the time."
Ade was right on both counts. Soldiers lived with
cynical exploitation: and she'd automatically thought she'd been chosen
because she was so bloody perfect. So this is
your come-uppance for conceit.
She shrugged, humbled by his courage in telling her
what she really didn't want to hear. "You're right. It really doesn't
matter any more. Let's finish the job."
Shapakti tugged cautiously at her sleeve, clearly
impatient with what he saw as a superfluous debate on motivation. "May
we take more samples please?"
Shan nodded, and Ade steered Shapakti into the camp.
She went to sit on the beach and wait for them.
Bezer'ej was a huge crescent moon in the late afternoon
sky, as shockingly exotic as Wess'ej had been when Josh Garrod had
first pointed it out to her and told her that it was inhabited. Ade and
Shapakti returned about fifteen minutes later, talking quietly. Shan
turned to smile at Ade, seeing him for a moment as the man she'd taken
a fancy to rather than a test of her fidelity, but he looked shaken.
He was unusually quiet all the way back to the
mainland. It was only when they had been picked up by the
transport--more like a mattress on a hovercraft than a vehicle--that he
spoke.
"If Shapakti can stop humans catching c'naatat,"
he said, "where does that leave us?"
Shapakti said nothing. Shan wondered what he had been
discussing with Ade: but Ade was an open book. He never kept secrets,
nor from her anyway.
"We'd be safer, Ade," she said. "A lot safer."
Things were not going as planned.
Eddie checked the fit of the ballistic vest again. The
Eqbas ship had landed but it hadn't yet lowered its ramp. He stared in
carefully controlled horror at the bulkhead image as wave after wave of
what he could only describe as gunfire hit the outer hull from the
perimeter of the landing strip. He could understand how useful a
see-through hull could be but that was scant comfort for his nerves.
It didn't seem to bother the Eqbas crew any more than
it bothered the mindless bee cam. The camera wove slowly from angle to
angle, taking its pick of the image: the Eqbas simply watched.
Ual was a Christmas tree of shivering ornaments, his
quills almost at right angles to his bulky oval body.
"Please cease firing," said Esganikan. Ralassi repeated
her request in isenj and Edie realized the message was being relayed
outside the hull.
The barrage continued. Esganikan shifted on her seat
and repeated the cease-fire request. Eddie had the feeling it was the
Eqbas equivalent of a police officer's warning before firing; two of
the bridge crew were taking great interest in a control panel.
"Very well," said Esganikan. "Cease firing immediately
or we will respond. We wish only to meet your administration and to
return Minister Ual."
There was a pause. Then the firing increased in
intensity, peppering the illusion of a glass hull with thousands of
exploding pinpoints of light.
"Suppress the fire," said Esganikan.
"Is that necessary?" said Ual.
Esganikan didn't even move her head. "We can sit here
and wait for your people to run out of ammunition, or we can leave, or
we can disembark and face the barrage."
"I would rather talk to them. Let me leave the ship."
"We are under fire."
"I'm an isenj minister of state. Whatever abuse my
colleagues might heap upon me, it's simply words. I can walk out there
and persuade them to hear you out."
"You're not our prisoner and you're free to leave, but
I still think this is foolhardy."
Esganikan was a soldier. Eddie suspected she'd met
quite a few welcoming committees like this one, because it didn't seem
to bother her at all. "Why don't you let me talk to them? I'm human.
I'm neutral."
"I'll do this," said Ual. "Tell them I'm coming out."
Esganikan's long hands were clasped in front of her
chest and she was absolutely immobile. "Go, then. It will not alter
what happens in the longer term."
Eddie got up and followed Ual to the hatch. "I'm still
coming with you," he said, but he didn't know why. It was a reflex:
something was happening and he had to rush to see it. He had a
ballistic vest. There was no point scrawling MEDIA
across the chest because the isenj behind the guns almost certainly
didn't read English. If they did, he had no guarantee that his status
would afford him any protection. It was like any foreign war.
"You have no protective headwear," said Ual.
The interior of the ship was as fluid and malleable as
the external hull, an adaptable ship for a rigid people. They were now
standing in a space that felt enclosed but there was only a thin
transparent membrane around them, and Eddie's gaze was fixed on the
exterior view that still filled the bulkhead.
It was like walking into a movie. "We can see them. Can
they see us?"
"No," said Esganikan. "When you have composed yourself,
we will create an opening."
"I will leave now and you will walk behind me," said
Ual.
I should have asked Ade how to
do this, thought Eddie. The bee cam was close to his head. This
is a beachhead landing. The front goes down and
out you go. Oh God oh God oh God. Where's my breather mask?
The bulkhead parted. It wasn't an image any longer.
Eddie could smell burning and he inhaled dust. He was right behind Ual,
close enough to notice his wet forest scent. The minister's beads were
rattling as he made his inelegant way down the ramp that was forming in
front of them.
There was absolute silence. The firing had stopped.
Ual let out a stream of high-pitched sounds. Was anyone
close enough to hear him? Eddie didn't know what to look for at the
perimeter fence and in the port buildings but he knew it was a
battlefield and his instinct scanned for movement or any cue to duck or
run.
Ual moved forward one slow pace at a time. Eddie
followed. His feet were still on the ramp when Ual trod on the dusty
landing field of Jejeno and a loud crack of expanding air and shrill
noise deafened him.
Something straw-colored hit his vest. Something threw
him flat on his back and the last thing he saw was the bee cam hovering
above him. Something had gone badly wrong.
He had no idea that isenj blood looked like thin yellow
plasma.
I now believe we
can extract the c'naatat organism from
human tissue. This will reduce the risk of severe environmental
consequences if more gethes were to become
carriers of the symbiont. But we should still regard it as a life-form
to be protected by quarantine.
DA SHAPAKTI
biologist-physician, Wess'ej mission
Nevyan knew now that her gut feel,
as Shan called it, had not been wrong.
And she had one question, a selfish one.
"Is Eddie hurt? What happened to him?"
Giyadas clung to her legs. Lisik and Livaor watched the
communications link in silence. Cidemnet had gone to fetch their fourth
house-brother Dijuas and the other children.
"He is alive," said Esganikan. The image showed calm
routine behind her on the ship's bridge.
"Eddie, Eddie, Eddie," trilled Giyadas. "Bring him
back. Bring him back. I will look after him."
Esganikan Gai had gone too far. The landing on Umeh had
been opposed--and that was another gethes
understatement Nevyan had learned, this time from Ade Bennett. Opposed
was an odd way to describe a furious
barrage of fire.
Esganikan didn't seem perturbed by it. "Minister Ual
was shot. We neutralized the resistance at Jejeno airfield and we
secured an entry point at Umeh Station. They have human physicians
there."
"Ual is dead?"
"We believe so. They began firing when the hatch
opened."
Isenj were fast-breeding polluters but they were also
orderly, urban, and restrained with each other. Nevyan struggled to
understand that they had opened fire on one of their own. It was an
indication of their fear, what Eddie called a knee-jerk.
"What do you mean by securing an entry?"
"We created a corridor."
"I don't understand."
"My apologies, Nevyan Chail.
I forget that you have obsolete technology. We have created an enclosed
environment to isolate Umeh Station, one hundred meters by their
reckoning at ground level and a thousand meters into airspace. That
enables us to come and go without encountering isenj for the time
being."
Nevyan was beginning to understand just how much
further the Eqbas had taken adaptive material technology. She clutched
the collar of her dhren to her throat, a
nervous habit, and the fabric reshaped itself. Like the tables that
would emerge from walls in the communal library, the technology was the
manipulation of molecular structure: but the Eqbas could now use it to
make fluid, ever-reshaping spacecraft and sea-going vessels and
impregnable corridors. Nevyan understood for a moment the
disorientation of sudden inferiority that the gethes
had faced. Wess'ej had been the pinnacle of technology in the Ceret
system, and now it was not.
As long as the Eqbas were kin and allies, that was no
threat.
"You shouldn't have interfered with the isenj on their
homeworld," said Nevyan. "There is no other species at risk there. And,
with the exception of Bezer'ej, they have never attacked us."
"Ual asked us for assistance, and the isenj will not
relinquish their claim on Bezer'ej. So we have choices--we teach them
to
live within their own boundaries, or we confine them to their planet,
or we destroy them."
"Targassat taught that the more choices you have, the
more restrained you must be in making them."
"Targassat did not accept the responsibility that comes
with power, which is why your ancestors fled here to avoid it. Eqbas
Vorhi accepts that if it can improve the
equity and stability of worlds, then it must.
It is a matter of interpretation."
Nevyan felt she was losing the debate. Esganikan was
comfortable in a warship millions of miles away, out of the influence
of jask. Nevyan's defensive instinct
welled up and the room fell into silence, even Giyadas seeming to
freeze and hold her breath.
Nevyan pressed on. If Shan were here, she'd know what
to do. "You don't have the military capability to take on Umeh with the
forces here."
"Of course we have, and so do you."
"We have barely enough ships to sustain the defense of
Bezer'ej."
"You have pathogens that can selectively target both gethes
and isenj."
No. No, no, no. "Those
are passive measures."
"We should discuss this later."
"Bring Eddie back here. We will care for him."
"As soon as he is ready to be moved, we'll return.
We're assessing the gethes in Umeh Station
at the moment." Esganikan's plumed mane tilted left and right. "They
are very different to the colony on
Mar'an'cas. How diverse human attitudes can be."
Nevyan could feel Giyadas's grip tightening on her leg.
The child was scared. She was reacting to Nevyan's scent and she feared
for Eddie. Eddie took foolish risks but he was, whether he acknowledged
it or not, on their side. Nevyan had had
to learn a whole new set of concepts to accompany her knowledge of
English, because wess'har had only one side to be on.
She switched off the screen and the living room wall
returned to its normal state of gold stone facings.
"Lisik, is Shan Chail back
from Mar'an'cas yet?"
"No, isan. Aras expects
her soon."
"Has she activated her virin?"
Lisik checked his own device. "Yes. Shall I recall her?"
"No, I'll talk to her."
Giyadas suddenly let go and stood straight, pulling
herself up to her full height and emitting a faint but definite scent
of adult anger and jask. She was growing
up fast.
"I know, isanket," said
Nevyan. "I fear for Eddie too. I fear for all of us."
But most of all Nevyan feared what she had unleashed.
And she had to face it, and deal with it: she could never return to her
past, her own world before.
Eddie knew he wasn't back in F'nar. The rest
was guesswork.
At any given moment he was very clear what was
happening to him, but when he tried to move from that single
freeze-frame to a coherent sequence of events he wasn't sure what had
happened at all.
He was in Umeh Station. He could just as easily have
been back in his cabin in the Thetis camp
on Bezer'ej if it had still existed. The walls had that same watery
green light and the place smelled of cleaning fluid. The flashback
impression was reinforced by voices he thought he recognized.
"He's not unconscious," said a male voice. "He didn't
lose consciousness. The ussissi said so."
"Eddie? Eddie?" Someone had hold of his forearm. "It's
Kris, Eddie. How are you feeling?"
"Where's Ual?"
"Come on, Eddie, talk to me. Can you see me?" She
caught his jaw in her hand and turned his head to face her. It was
Kristina Hugel, the medic from the Thetis
payload, and she was running a handscanner over his head. He could hear
it clicking, bouncing sound waves through his skull to detect fracture
and hemorrhage. "Can you see me okay, Eddie?"
"Kris?"
"Good boy. You're okay. You were hit but you're okay.
More blood than real damage. Any pain?"
His mouth was dry and he had a dull headache. "Hit
where? Where's Ual?" He was aware his shirt was covered in blood, real
red human blood, so it had to be his. "Who's got my camera?"
"It followed you in and we didn't know how to switch it
off."
Eddie was damned if he was going to be kept flat on his
back. He struggled to sit up. "Hit where?"
"You got hit in the head by something sharp. It's taken
a slice out of your scalp but you'll be okay in a few days."
"You're not answering me. Where's Ual?"
"I don't know. The Eqbas brought you in and they're
strutting round the place like storm troopers at the moment."
"Get Esganikan."
"Who's he?"
"She. The commander. The big female with the Mohican
hairdo."
Kris smelled of old-fashioned antiseptic and stale
coffee. She turned away to someone. "Vani, see if the ussissi can help,
will you?" She caught Eddie by the shoulders just as he was about to
put all his weight on his feet. "I wouldn't wander around if I were
you. It's a bit chaotic here."
"Christ, that's par for the course. There's a war
starting out there."
"Is it true they've recalled Thetis
to ship us back?"
"God, I don't know. It'll take the best part of a year
or more if they have, and it's going to be a hairy old year to wait
out."
He listened. He couldn't hear firing. He wasn't sure if
noise would travel through the sealed shell of the dome, but he thought
he'd at least be able to feel the vibrations of explosions.
"Please, let me get up."
Kris Hugel offered him an arm to lean on. He caught a
glimpse of himself in the mirror above the hand basin. He was in the
infirmary. The gash in his scalp looked horrific, an angry stripe with
the hair shaved away and the wound simply sealed with basic first-aid
dermabond. He couldn't remember that happening at all.
"I'm a mess," he said. "How can I do a piece to camera
looking like this? I need to know what happened to Ual. I've got to
find Esganikan."
"You're concussed, Eddie. Just take it easy."
No. It was his personal
responsibility now. He had helped Ual arrange the snatch of Lindsay and
Rayat. He was now so far across the neutral line that he knew he would
never function as a journalist again, and he hadn't actually noticed
the final point at which he had abandoned all the rules. It was
incremental. The thin end of the wedge was very hard to spot when you
were staring at it head on.
He tottered out of the three-room complex that made up
the infirmary with Kris Hugel steering him by the elbow. The dome was
surprisingly quiet, but packed with humans and more ussissi than he'd
ever seen assembled in one place, even when they had last evacuated
Jejeno when they thought Wess'ej would launch a retaliatory attack.
"That's not good," he said.
Ralassi sought him out. He was carrying a couple of
bags that looked like rough-woven sacks. "Are you fit to travel?"
"Why? What?"
"No ussissi will serve the isenj now. That means no
shuttles between Umeh and Tasir Var, or between continents. When we ask
for our separateness to be respected, we mean it. Are you leaving with
us?"
"What about us, then?" said Hugel. "What happens until Thetis
arrives?"
"The same as would have happened otherwise," said
Ralassi. "You survive. The Eqbas will protect the corridor until it's
time for you to leave."
Eddie struggled for a grasp of reality. "What do you
mean, protect the corridor?"
Ralassi pointed up into the canopy of the dome. The
translucent filters and the tangle of vines obscured the view of the
sky. "You can walk outside if you like. It's secure."
Adrenaline was a wonderful thing. Eddie shook off
Hugel's arm and swayed his way to one of the exits. Normally he had to
put on a breather mask to cope with the atmosphere outside,
sulfur-tainted and low on oxygen even by the standards he'd
acclimatized to on Bezer'ej: but the air outside felt… normal. As he
looked out across the service road towards the building-upon-building
city that crowded up to the perimeter, he couldn't work out what was
different, and then he realized there were two notable things.
There were almost no isenj in the streets. Jejeno was
usually heaving with bodies. And there was something familiar: the heat
haze effect of an encircling barrier, like the one that surrounded
Constantine, except he now knew this one would do more than simply
filter out alien cells or trigger alarms. He followed the wall of haze
above the level of the buildings, tilting his head back as far as the
pain would allow, and saw the Eqbas ship holding steady in the sky
right above Umeh Station.
It was how Eddie used to dispose of spiders. A glass
upturned over the creature, a piece of stiff paper slipped underneath,
and he could carry the spider to an open window and dump it outside. He
never did believe in killing spiders. And now he was under the upturned
glass, dependent on the kindness of big incomprehensible creatures who
might allow him to scuttle away, or who might just as easily crush him.
Bronze droplets appeared to be falling from the ship.
Three of them descended like elevators without cables. It was only when
they were around 200 meters from the ground that it dawned on Eddie
that they were more detached parts of the ship ferrying personnel to
and from the dome.
"I hate this helpless feeling."
Kris Hugel stood beside him and looked up too. "I know
I should marvel at all this but I just want to go home. I thought I was
going back the first time and they thawed us out. But this time, I am
absolutely not coming back."
Eddie's gratitude for medical assistance had
evaporated. "If you'd kept your mouth shut about Frankland's parasite,
none of this would have happened."
"Oh, and you weren't digging around and speculating
about it. I hallucinated that, did I?"
"Okay, we all played our part in this fucking mess."
"Is it true?"
"What?"
"That she survived being spaced."
"Yeah. Right as rain."
"Jesus."
"Just walk away, Kris. Walk away, like she told you the
first time."
Beyond the upturned glass of the Eqbas shield, isenj
had started to venture out into the streets again. Eddie sat down on
the curb that ran around the circumference of Umeh Station, feet in the
gutter, and supported his head in shaking hands.
A shadow fell across him and it wasn't Ralassi's. He
didn't need to look up.
"Just tell me what happened to Ual," he said.
Esganikan didn't sit down beside him. He expected her
to, but then he realized why and reminded himself that for all her
similarities with Shan, she was utterly alien and had none of Shan's
capacity for psychological subtlety.
"He died," she said. "He was wrong. His countrymen did open
fire, even if they did not intend him
to die. The result is the same. And now the factions appear to be
clashing--those who want to wage war on us and those who favor asking
for our aid rather than the alternative."
"You sound like you've played this game before."
"We are seldom welcome. By definition, we arrive
because matters have gone badly wrong."
"So what are you going to do now?"
"Wait and see what happens. There is no other species
at risk here, and we can come and go as we please."
"You had a complement of two thousand crew, tops. This
planet has a population of billions. Even you can't crack those odds."
"I had this very conversation with Nevyan Tan Mestin.
If we need a weapon, we already have one--the engineered pathogen
deployed on Bezer'ej."
Eddie's scalp tightened and it wasn't because of the
gash in it. You promised. Shan, you promised they
wouldn't.
"No," he said. "No, you can't use bioweapons here, not
that one--"
"I didn't say we would."
Esganikan wouldn't have been playing games like a
human. She was simply answering his questions in a logical, literal
order. Shan, you said they'd never use it t o
attack Umeh. That was why he agreed to get a sample of isenj
DNA, to use his access to Ual. It was the ultimate betrayal. The guy
was dead, and he had helped him reach that point, and now he was the
procurer of weapons, every bit as bad as all the scientists he'd
despised in history for creating bombs and diseases and other tricks
for the use of politicians.
"Poor bastard," he said. He thought he meant Ual. "You
poor bastard." And he sat crying quietly in the gutter of a besieged
human enclave twenty-five light-years from home.
Superintendent
Frankland,
I'm responding
to your message, which was forwarded to me. I'm afraid Granddad passed
away four months ago. He hadn't been well for some time. He used to
talk about you all the time and I know it would have meant a lot to him
to know you still thought about him.
Yours,
JAY MCEVOY HARRIS,
granddaughter of Chief Constable Robert McEvoy
"He'll be okay, kid," said Shan.
Giyadas had a firm grip on Shan's leg and it was a
measure of his isan's discomfort that Aras
couldn't smell her scent at all. She was suppressing it again. She
didn't like being around children, not even little adults like Giyadas.
Ade, taking excessive care over brewing the tea, caught his eye: they
exchanged a glance, silently working out who was going to extract her
from the grip.
"This was unexpected," said Nevyan.
"You bet."
"I am to blame for summoning them."
"No, they're to blame for going in mob-handed." Shan
kept glancing down at Giyadas. It was clear that she didn't like being
pinned to the spot but she seemed reluctant to push the child aside.
"Maybe this is none of my business, but I'm bloody uncomfortable with
the idea of Eqbas having the engineered pathogens. Isenj or
human."
"Come with me. Dissuade Esganikan."
Shan's arms were folded tight across her chest. Aras
could see the faint flicker of violet light leaking from her clenched
fists, and he moved to steer Giyadas away by her shoulder. "I'll
dissuade her, all right," said Shan. "They didn't need to go crashing
in there. Do you think they can contain the isenj without needing to
use bioweapons?"
"They say they can. But further support is years away."
"Y'know, I'm not someone who likes to talk their way
out of trouble when there's a quicker way of doing the job, but I think
talking is just what's needed now."
"I think you should stay out of it," said Ade.
"I'm not asking you," said Shan.
Aras intervened more from the disappointment of a
broken promise than to back up his house-brother in waiting. "You
promised you would leave Esganikan to pursue her own course unless she
interfered with the gene bank."
"Let's get one thing straight," said Shan. "This is
what I do. I sort things out. I can help Nevyan defuse this situation
and I don't even need my gun to do it, so let me just do what I do best
and then we can all get on with our lives. Right now, Attila the Parrot
is considering wholesale slaughter and even I feel uneasy about that."
"Part of the ship will be back in an a few hours," said
Nevyan. "The remainder is maintaining the corridor while more
transports go to evacuate the ussissi. They're all leaving."
"Well, that'll give the isenj a few logistics problems
to keep them busy." Shan seemed to soften towards Giyadas, or at least
to feign concern very well. There was still no scent. She squatted down
to look the isanket straight in the eye.
"Sweetheart, Eddie's okay. He's probably very upset, though, but if he
comes back angry it won't be with you."
"I know that," said Giyadas. "He'll be angry with you."
Aras didn't think Shan cared what anyone thought of
her, but he was wrong. The constricting blood vessels in her face gave
her an instant pallor.
"Right again, kid."
She stood up and took the bowl of tea that Ade offered
her. Aras thought he detected an attempt at placatory eye contact, but
Ade was having none of it and wouldn't look at her. They all drank in
silence.
There was a knock at the door. It inched open and
Shapakti peered around it. "May I speak to Shan
Chail?"
"She's a bit busy," said Ade.
"It really is very important."
"Not now, Shapakti," said Shan. "I've got something to
sort out. I'll catch you later."
Shapakti hesitated for a few seconds then slid back
across the threshold and closed the door. Shan drained her bowl and
rinsed it under the spigot.
"Okay, Nev," she said. "Let's go. Mango time."
It was always a bad sign when Shan attempted humor.
Aras and Ade were now alone with their doubts.
"She's put on a bit more meat in the last day or so,"
said Ade, transparently upset even though he tried to disguise the
fact. "I reckon she's nearly back to normal."
"Don't be alarmed by her manner. She does care about
us."
Us. Yes, it was a case of
us. Once the current crisis had receded,
things would settle down.
They had to.
There were an awful lot of ussissi.
They streamed down the ramp of the transport and moved
across the plain in an unbroken column in the direction of the little
Easter-egg domed village where Shan had nearly found out the hard way
how they attacked. She watched them with Nevyan and Serrimissani.
"No customs control, then?"
"There are many more to come," said Serrimissani,
ignoring her. She had collected a couple of sacks from one of the new
arrivals, and Shan noted that without inquiring about the contents. Old
habits died hard. "Some have joined the search for Vijissi's body. This
is quite appalling. We have never been compromised like this before."
"Where's Esganikan?"
"I have no more idea than you."
"Have you got a problem with me or are you just always
fucking rude?"
"My apologies." But she didn't sound as if she meant it.
Nevyan waited with her hands clutched at the collar of
her dhren, her classic nervous gesture. Come on, buck up,
Shan thought. But Nevyan was
just a kid herself, thrust into adulthood a matter of months ago under
trying circumstances. Shan wondered if she'd have been as capable of
statesmanlike behavior at the equivalent age.
No, she didn't think she had. But she'd been well able
to handle herself in a fight. And this wasn't even a fight: no blows
needed trading and no guns needed to be drawn. All she had to do was
want her own way, and mean it. The trick was not to become so
aggressive that she overwhelmed Esganikan and found herself in command
of an Eqbas army for the next five years.
What's going to happen when they
reach Earth?
She put it to the back of her mind. Humans had asked
for it. There was work to be done on Earth. Umeh was too far down the
toilet.
They could wipe out humanity if
they set their minds to it. Are you okay with that?
She found she couldn't get that worked up about it and
waited in grim silence with Nevyan while the wind whipped up her
trouser legs. She bent down and tucked them into her make-do wess'har
boots. It was unusually cold weather for F'nar, they said. She found it
pleasantly cool.
And it struck her that she was more worried about the
isenj than her own kind.
Nevyan consulted her virin. "Esganikan
travels on board the next vessel," she said.
"Okay, we don't let her disembark. We get her in her
cabin. Enclosed space." Shan decided she could always hand control to
Chayyas or Mestin if things went wrong. "Why does it work like that?"
"Work like what?"
"Jask. How come I face down
Chayyas and she cedes her dominance, but we can take on Esganikan
without her ceding to either of us?"
"Everyone's jask is
unique. If matriarchs ceded to communal scents nobody would ever be
able to take responsibility, which is how we're influenced by the
common will. A fail-safe mechanism, I think you call it."
"I still prefer slugging it out, I think."
"Nobody is injured by jask."
"Okay, then let's make sure we don't go over the top
with this."
"I can't take on her role. I know my limits."
"It won't come to that."
Shit, it might.
On the horizon, now deep turquoise with the failing
light, three dark smooth shapes appeared and a characteristic boom
shook the air. They slowed and hung almost motionless above a cluster
of lava plugs. Then they came together and merged. And one ship landed.
"Jesus," said Shan. "How can any defense force deal
with that? I mean, you think the enemy's
sailing up the river in a bloody great destroyer and then you blink and
they've got five frigates. Holy shit."
"As long as they are on our side,
as you put it, this can only be good."
"And are they?"
Nevyan was a cloud of acid anxiety. "I believe they are
fundamentally like us even if they're less
restrained. They want to create a more permanent base here."
"Like the Temporary City?"
"Yes."
"And what have you said?"
"You can't ask for someone's aid and then deny them
what they need to give it. And their way of life is too different for
them to settle in the city for the next few years."
"It'll work out."
"I know I can rely on you."
It almost didn't make sense. But wess'har were full of
non sequiturs.
The ship settled. Heat shimmered beneath the hull as
the craft lowered itself to the ground until it was as flat and solid
as a building. Shan found herself standing at the hatch as soon as it
formed in the bulkhead, even before the ramp extruded from it. The
Eqbas who was on the other side of it didn't seem startled.
"Nevyan and I will be seeing Esganikan Gai in her
cabin," said Shan. "Show me where it is."
The ship's interior still disoriented Shan because it
was all shifting light and shadow, triggering her wess'har low-light
vision but also leaving her with the unsettling feeling of being in a
mirrored and deceptive shopping mall, a difficult place to pursue a
suspect. A bulkhead melted and Esganikan appeared in front of her.
The matriarch focused on Shan with snapping four-lobed
pupils, head tilting. You really can't gauge me
without the scent, can you? Then she stared past her at Nevyan.
"You are anxious," said Esganikan. "Ual was most
unfortunate but Eddie Michallat is recovering."
"Fine, but that's not what we wanted to talk to you
about," said Shan.
The Thetis payload had
been worried about Shan's lack of training in alien contact; they'd be
shitting themselves now. Esganikan looked as if she was planning to
walk past both of them but Shan stood her ground, feeling herself on
the tightrope that separated authority from overkill. Keeping a rein on
her scent was like trying to control a sneeze. She was aware of the
physical sensations now: she concentrated on contracting muscles in her
neck.
"Are the prospects for your own planet bothering you?"
"Depends what you mean by my planet," said Shan. "But
right now we're not happy about the use of the isenj pathogen."
"I haven't used it."
"And we don't want you to," said Nevyan.
A few crew members wandering around the ship stopped to
watch, and then stood very still in the wess'har alarm reflex.
"It might be necessary," said Esganikan.
Shan stepped a little closer, close enough to start a
fight on Earth. "Let's get this clear. As long as they stay put on Umeh
and don't bother us, or Bezer'ej, or any other planet, then you don't
deploy bioweapons."
"That is the way it has been here for generations,"
said Nevyan. "Apart from Bezer'ej, they have never staged incursions."
"You fear for your fellow humans in Jejeno."
"I couldn't give a shit
about Umeh Station," said Shan. "You understand that? I don't care. But
the isenj will have to do something extreme to justify attacking them
on their home ground. Mjat was their own fault. There's nothing left of
Umeh to restore so I don't see what you stand to gain by wiping them
out."
"I didn't plan to. But Ual consented to population
control measures, ones we can take without culling."
Shan could taste the sweet fruit scent at the back of
her palate.
Nevyan was standing very close to her. "We still want
your assurance that you won't use the pathogen without our agreement."
Esganikan stood silent, gaze flickering between Shan
and Nevyan. Shan could taste the pheromones getting stronger. Then the
Eqbas simply cocked her head, forced to concede. "Yes," she said. "I
agree. But we will still carry out the birth control measures."
Shan felt a bead of sweat trickle down her spine and
she resisted the urge to scratch it. "Okay."
"Why have you stopped breathing?"
"It's just a habit."
"Do you wish to plead for your own planet now?"
"Where's this going?"
"We were told you were wess'har and that you lived in
balance. Are you losing your resolve and reverting to type?"
"No. Believe me, just because the UN says that it's
banned exploration it doesn't mean anyone will honor that."
"But even if Earth does curtail its expansion, we're
still obliged to intervene. There are many other Earth species in need
of assistance."
Yes, Esganikan was right, and it hurt: Shan was
losing her nerve. But it wasn't because she
thought they were wrong. It was because she was uneasy about the
potential violence that would be on her conscience. And Esganikan
wasn't taunting her: Shan had misunderstood the Eqbas's motive because
she had slipped back into thinking like a gethes.
Esganikan was simply trying to explain the situation.
Like all wess'har, she was seeking a binding consensus. "When you
investigated crime, did you wait for the perpetrator to call you to ask
you to aid their victim?"
And Shan understood. She
understood not in the intellectual way of the legislator, or of the
officer called to abide by laws of evidence, but at a gut level that
said coppers don't just stand by and let it
happen. Fuck the rules. She was picking up her baton again and
sorting things out the old-fashioned way, because it was right.
She thought like an Eqbas and that made her
uncomfortable.
But after a few seconds it didn't feel that
uncomfortable at all. Humans would have to live with the consequences
of exploitation. It was simple. It was what she had always believed
deep down.
"You won't get any argument from me," said Shan.
Nevyan, steeped in the isolationist, mind-your-own
business culture of Targassat, turned and walked away briskly.
Esganikan took it as the end of the conversation and disappeared in the
other direction. Shan was left standing alone for a few seconds, not
quite understanding what had happened. The wess'har lack of valediction
always wrong-footed her.
She caught up with Nevyan outside. The young matriarch
exuded that vinegary scent that went with anger. Her pupils were
dilated. She rounded on Shan.
"I find this very hard," she said. "Forgive me for my
anger, but you encourage the Eqbas taste for interfering."
"Hey, it's my planet, and it's fucked. We need
them. And the isenj could do with not
knocking out so many kids."
"You haven't seen what the Eqbas can do."
"Oh, but I have. Eddie showed me the pictures of the
worlds they've sorted out. Anyway, they're wess'har so whatever they
do, they won't be screwing the underdog and exploiting those who can't
help themselves, which is one hundred percent of the nonhuman life on
Earth and a bloody big chunk of the human population, too."
"This intervention is why our two communities went our
separate ways."
"I know all that. But your idyll is over, Nev. The
galaxy changes. My filthy species is on the loose and it was only a
matter of time before Eqbas noticed us. If they leave you alone, and
they don't bother the isenj, will that make you happy? Because if you
want them to be any different, then you're exactly the same as
them--imposing your values on others."
Nevyan was walking fast towards the city, as fast as
Shan could cover the ground: they were the same height, Nevyan short
for a wess'har, Shan tall for a human female.
"I can't argue with your logic," she said. "But I feel
afraid."
"You need to talk to someone who's faced real danger.
Talk to Ade. Talk to Aras."
Nevyan stopped and swung round. Shan's instinct said draw your
weapon and she knew it was stupid, but
she felt it anyway and sidestepped instead. Nevyan didn't appear to
guess what had flashed through her mind. She was fidgeting with her dhren.
"I know I'm afraid of change," said Nevyan. "For F'nar,
I represent huge change, and to you I must seem like stagnation. But I
can't help what I feel."
"It's okay." Shan wanted to comfort her. She was
handling a situation that would have made seasoned politicians back
home crap themselves, and the kid should have been proud of that.
Instead she was scared, and Shan couldn't even bring herself to hug
her. She gripped her upper arm instead. "It's okay. I understand. There
are things that you take in your stride that scare me."
The still silence was awkward. "Shapakti is anxious to
talk to you."
"I know. But I ought to apologize to Ade first. I was
rude to him. He deserves respect."
"Yes, make things right with your jurej've.
We'll talk in the morning."
Shan let Nevyan stride ahead while she ambled and
finally fell behind. F'nar was speckled with pinpricks of light,
utterly magical even in the dusk. She could be sure that dinner would
be on the table when she got back, and an uninvited memory of her
police colleagues at Western Division sprang into her mind. She was
walking into the police sports and social club bar across the road from
divisional headquarters, shift complete, pleased with herself, looking
forward to a single beer, because she didn't like surrendering control
to alcohol. Did I have a busy day? Oh, I just
averted interplanetary genocide, nothing serious. Who's buying me a
pint?
She missed them. She thought about them less and less
these days, but it was still hard to accept they were probably all
dead. Rob McEvoy was dead too. She didn't even know if she'd helped him
step into the gap she'd left. She hoped so.
The world was still full of good people who deserved
better. She was never sure if she was one of them.
Wess'har didn't have mirrors but Ade didn't
need to shave now anyway. He could see very few changes that c'naatat
had made to him, but he could tell that
it didn't see the point of having body hair.
He'd get used to it. He propped the polished metal
sheet against the wall and brushed his teeth, staring at a distorted
reflection that looked near enough the same Ade Bennett he was used to
seeing.
How much longer would the toothbrush last? He examined
the bristles. If the wess'har could build self-repairing warships then
a duplicate brush wouldn't be a problem. Salt and lavender oil made a
good enough dentifrice, too; it was only for cosmetic purposes, because
c'naatat would see off any tooth decay. He
just wanted to be sure that he tasted okay if he ever got lucky with
Shan.
He bent over the birdbath-shaped washbasin and rinsed,
rubbing his tight-shut eyes, then stood up to bury his face in a sek
towel. It smelled of cut grass.
"So that's the tattoo that
hurt," said Shan.
Ade clutched the towel to his groin, mortified. "I
didn't hear you come in."
"My fault. I didn't knock." She seemed to be trying
hard to look him in the eye and not succeeding. She made a visible
effort to raise her eyes from his crotch. "I just wanted to apologize
for telling you to mind your own business in front of everyone. Not
nice. Sorry. I know you worry."
"It's okay."
"I don't think private apologies are
okay, actually, so I'll repeat it when the others are around."
"Really, it doesn't matter." Please,
go away. Let me put my pants on. "I've got something for you."
"You're not kidding."
"No, I've really got
something for you." He gestured towards the door with one hand, holding
the towel in place with the other and knowing he looked about as stupid
as he could get. "Go into the living room. Go on."
Shit, shit, shit. He
could never do this right. He wrapped the towel around his waist and
padded out after her. The sack was still on the flagstones by the door:
knowing how much she was still the archetypal copper, he was surprised
that she hadn't taken a look inside. If she had, she wasn't saying.
"This is for you," he said.
She held the sack slightly away from her body,
two-handed, and opened it cautiously. "Uhhh,"
she said. He'd never seen such a spontaneous expression of delight on
her face before. It transformed her. She was illuminated. She reached
in and lifted out the precious, hard-won pair of rigger's boots. "Aww,
Ade, I thought you'd forgotten."
"I never forget that kind of thing."
"These are great. Just the
job."
"Sorry about the color. I was working on getting them
dyed black somehow."
"Brown's fine. Don't you worry about that." She seemed
totally distracted by the boots and he wondered how much else he simply
didn't know about her. She was a straightforward, practical woman,
satisfied by sensible things, with no mystery or whim or mood to fathom
out. "And I snarled at you. Sorry. Not sure how I can make up for that."
"I've thought of something."
"Saucy bugger."
"Okay, that was out of order."
"No, it's not out of order at all. I offered,
remember?" She put the boots carefully by the door, side by side, still
glowing with admiration as she gazed at them. Then Ade realized she was
concentrating on them a little too hard. He wondered when she might say
the word openly. "It's not you, Ade, it's me. I know it's what Aras
wants and I want it to be that way too, but I just have to get my head
straight before…you know."
Ade knew only too well. He was a complication. He was a
dilemma in Shan's dead straight, old-fashioned right-and-wrong world;
he knew without asking that she had never, ever cheated on a man. Her
honest loyalty was both one of the qualities he loved and a barrier to
getting what he wanted.
"I'm coming between you two," he said. He knew
it. It broke his heart. He had her back,
alive, the impossible fantasy of every bereaved person in history, and
now he was about to make her deeply unhappy. He couldn't bear it. "I'm
going to cause you both a lot of pain and I don't want that."
"Not at all. Not at all, sweetheart. It'll be fine."
Shan was the only person he knew who had to work out
the moral argument before doing something. She never did what she
wanted: she did what was right. It was one
of those things that sounded clean and admirable until you were staring
it in the face and it was about to say no to you.
And right then he found himself thinking not about
being a moment away from having sex with a woman he worshiped, or
complicating her loyalties, but about obeying Lindsay Neville's order
to transport nuclear weapons to Bezer'ej.
"I'd better put some clothes on," he said. Guilt was a
passion-killer all right. "I'm glad you like the boots."
Shan was staring at his shoulder now. "Did you know
you've developed some bioluminescence?"
He twisted his neck to look at the top of his left arm.
The tattoo he'd had done when he signed up as a marine--the Corps'
globe
and laurel, a defiant reminder that he was finally free of his dad's
unpredictable drunken rages--looked backlit. Faint violet flickers
escaped from under the dark pigment.
"Blimey," he said, desperate to lift the mood. "If it's
in all my tattoos now, at least I'll be
able to find it in the dark."
It was a legacy of the bezeri. And it wasn't funny at
all. It just reminded him that he was a fighting man who hadn't fought
when it most mattered: when he should have refused an unlawful, immoral
order.
Yeah, guilt really turned you off.
Lindsay Neville stood on the Mar'an'cas
shoreline and debated how far out she might have to wade before she
couldn't change her mind and scramble back to shore.
There was nothing she could salvage in her life now.
She had started to come to terms with David's death, and in time she
might come to live with the knowledge that she had helped kill
thousands of sentient beings. But it had all been for nothing.
The parasite had survived, and Shan had survived, and
bezeri had survived. Now the remnant would remember what she had done,
and hate her. That thought bothered her. It disturbed her that she
found their survival another blow and not some measure of relief.
And Shan Frankland hadn't shot her when she was
absolutely, utterly convinced that she would do it without a second
thought. The bitch wouldn't put her out of her misery.
She'd do it herself, then. She cupped her hand and
studied the bioscreen grown into her palm. The living screen was dead,
just a patch of shivering green light, and there were no readouts from
the marines. They were either out of range or they had deactivated
their links, but either way it said the same thing: you're on your
own.
She checked the cloud formation and the wind direction
for a while, still a sailor, and decided now was as good a time as any.
Lindsay wasn't a strong swimmer. The cold made her
catch her breath and she felt the current buffet her as she waded out
into the shallows. Why didn't you just jump?
There's plenty of cliffs. Why pick this beach? Going to change your
mind? All she had to do was strike out and swim until she
couldn't swim any longer. It wasn't going to hurt as much as living
with what she'd become and it would be over, over, over.
They said drowning didn't hurt at all.
The cold was starting to numb her. Two minutes, maybe
five: that was all the time you had in cold water, or so they told you
in survival training. She knew people survived a lot longer. It wasn't
as grand a gesture as stepping out into space but it was the best she
could do.
A wave hit her and she gulped in water, coughing and
choking. The impulse to turn and head back to dry land was almost
overwhelming. But she struck out further, surprised how much she rose
and fell with the choppy waves. She was starting to slip from being in
control of her environment to being overwhelmed by it, the point at
which self-preserving panic would kick in.
No, she wasn't Shan Frankland, making a final gesture
of sacrifice. She was ending it all, just running away. She could hear
her own choking sobs. She didn't have a single noble thought in her
head and she knew she had chickened out of dying the right way once
before, but this time she was going to do it.
Every stroke she took brought her closer to a point
where she couldn't get back. Funny: it seemed so much easier than
pulling the pin on a grenade.
Seawater flooded her mouth again. For the first time
she wondered what might swim in these seas. Maybe she wouldn't drown at
all. Maybe she would fall into the transparent maw of a marine version
of a sheven or an alyat,
or worse.
She wasn't all that far out. It just felt like deep sea
because the coastal shelf fell away sharply beneath her and the
currents changed dramatically.
Then something grabbed her from behind. Sheven.
Don't be stupid: shevens live on Bezer'ej.
But a hand, a human hand with
strong fingers, tipped her chin up and forced her onto her back. She
lashed out. The hand became an arm round her neck and the next
directionless kick she managed was greeted with a crack across the head.
"Relax or I bloody well will
hold you under," said Rayat.
"Sod off--"
"Coward. Bloody little coward."
"Let go."
"You're not getting out of this." He was pulling her
backwards and she was running out of fight. "I can't stand a quitter."
"Fine time--"
"Shut up."
"--to play the hero."
"Shut up. You've got a job to do."
Lindsay kicked a few more times. This time he punched
her hard, a fist right on the top of her head. She wasn't sure if she'd
changed her mind or not. All she knew was that she didn't want to be
where she was right then, with the things that wouldn't ever leave her
mind.
Rayat hauled her back inshore, a textbook rescue.
"Bastard," she said, and coughed up water.
TO:
the Representative from Eqbas Vorhi.
FROM:
The Right Honorable James Matsoukis MAP, Pacific Rim States Lead
Delegate to the United Nations.
On behalf of our
regional government, I invite your delegation to land in our territory.
This is a binding agreement on behalf of the Australasian Republic and
will be honored by all future administrations. We share your concern
for global ecology and we will offer every cooperation. If there is any
action we can take now to prepare for your arrival, please inform this
office.
We welcome to
your assistance. It is a sad indictment of the ability of our nations
to work in partnership when we need to request the arbitration of an
external government.
Rayat made Lindsay a hot mug of broth. She
considered checking it for poison because he wasn't a tea-and-sympathy
kind of man, not at all.
"Coward's way out," he said.
She sipped. "I bet you were great on the suicide
helpline. Don't you have a cyanide capsule you can take?"
They were huddled in the relative warmth of one of the
makeshift greenhouses on Mar'an'cas, but not so close as to touch.
"Well, you either die well or live well, that's my
motto. Have you heard from Frankland?"
"What do you think? And how would she call me? She's
probably begging Esganikan to let her disembowel me."
"She could have killed you back in F'nar, but she
didn't. That tells me there's still room for maneuver."
Lindsay could see colonists going about their business,
blurred into an impressionist painting by the condensation on the
transparent sheeting. "I can't go on with this."
"So you're going to escape from the reality by topping
yourself. Heroic."
"Well, seeing as I'm not good at rolling back the
clock, yes."
"I hear the bezeri that survived are struggling. Ever
thought of offering them a hand?"
"I don't think the Eqbas believe in community service
orders," she said, and slurped the broth. It scalded her lip. "Or maybe
I could go scrub Ouzhari clean."
"If you want atonement, maybe that's what you need."
Rayat wiped his nose against the back of his hand. "But you'd need to
have c'naatat to do that. It's a little
hot."
"Look, I'm going to die," she said. "And you're going
to die too. What are you playing at?"
Rayat had a habit of not blinking, just like Shan.
Lindsay imagined that he was also as adept as Shan at getting people to
do things they didn't want to do, and not by charm. Every conversation
with him left her feeling as if he had done something terrible to her
and then erased her memory of it, leaving only the impression that
she'd been violated in some way. He was looking for an edge, even on
the brink of death.
"I'm just not good at comforting people," he said,
apparently contrite. "Sorry."
He stared into his mug for a moment, facial muscles
slackening for a split second. For that instant she saw not a spook,
but a man who did a dirty, necessary job that nobody else would do, and
had no friends, no lovers, and nobody he could even trust to tell what
kind of a day he had really had. Pity almost ambushed her. But she
shook it off, knowing now what that feeling of violation was.
Wretched or not, Rayat was marvelously manipulative.
"You bastard," she said. She struggled to her feet and
tipped the rest of the broth into the soil bed. "You think you're
sliding out of this? No bloody way. You'll get whatever's coming to me
too, don't you worry. I'll make sure of that."
Rayat stared up at her, still unblinking, and shrugged.
Lindsay stalked out and walked back up the path to the shore and
settled down in the lee of some rocks.
Atonement.
The notion kept circling around her mind, looking for a
chance to strike. You couldn't wipe the slate clean of tens, hundreds
of thousands of deaths, not by doing a
few good deeds. So did that mean she could just shrug and find release
in permanent oblivion, and not even try?
She'd been around the colonists for too long. Perhaps
she was worried subconsciously that there really was some higher
authority she'd have to answer to. It seemed an imminent prospect.
She'd seen crew in extreme danger switch from being openly atheist to
begging some god or other to save them; death's threshold was the one
point in your life when you found out whether you really believed or
not.
What could I do, anyway?
She was a naval officer. Every scrap of training and
every thread of her personality was bound up with responsibility and
duty. She had to act.
But the Eqbas didn't need volunteers. And only Shan
Frankland and her ilk could survive under water.
Lindsay paused.
It was an insane idea. She dismissed it, but it
wouldn't leave. It came back and settled on her shoulder like a
persistent pet bird.
Eddie didn't know if the Australasian offer was
stupidity, arse-kissing surrender, a cynical PR stunt or enlightened
thinking on an unprecedented scale. But he knew it was trouble.
Giyadas sat staring into his face while he watched the
ITX feed, propped on a pile of blankets in Nevyan's warren of excavated
rooms. He didn't find her gaze distracting now. He worked through the
news channels and noted the sliding scale of fighting talk, from the
slight regret of the Sinostates to the over-my-dead-body stance of the
African Assembly.
"They're coming, whatever you say," he said to the
screen.
Giyadas shifted position, but her gaze was fixed.
"I'm not going to drop dead," he said.
"I'm keeping an eye on you. That is the phrase, yes?"
"I'm fine. I've had worse head injuries falling over
drunk."
"Yes, but you have emotional injuries too."
"Like I said, I've had worse."
"When will you visit Shan?"
Eddie wasn't sure why he blamed Shan and he didn't know
quite what he blamed her for. Ual had gambled and lost. Shan had done
what she thought was needed to secure Bezer'ej. It just didn't feel
that way. "I'll leave it a few days."
"Esganikan has agreed not to use bioweapons on Umeh."
"Right."
"She won't. Nevyan and
Shan made her concede."
"Bully for Shan, then." Eddie reached out and ruffled
Giyadas's tufted mane. "I suppose I feel I let a friend down."
"Was Ual your friend?"
"Close enough to make me feel like a heap of shit for
conning him over his DNA."
He didn't know if she understood that, but he imagined
she'd be saying shit before too long. He
took his rolled-up editing screen from his top pocket and flicked
through the list of files waiting to be ITXed back to News Desk if only
the UN portal would let him pass.
He hadn't looked at the bee cam's footage from the
landing. To be more accurate, he hadn't looked at the footage from the
point where the ramp went down. He was certain the bee cam had done
what it was programmed to do and followed the action, which almost
certainly meant graphic images of Ual being shot. Would he use it? The
boundaries of what could be shown to audiences had been burst open
centuries ago. A fat alien spider spraying body fluids wouldn't even
raise an eyebrow.
But to use it, he had to edit it, and that meant
looking at it. And that was what he couldn't do right then. He knew
plenty of colleagues who had calmly cut sequences involving the graphic
deaths of people they knew and even liked, and theyconsidered it a duty
and an act of respect, but Eddie found he was no longer one of them.
How many more reminders do you
need?
"Eddie?"
So if you're not a journalist,
what are you now?
"Eddie? Eddie, have you decided whether you'll return
to Earth with the Eqbas?"
You know, it's not so bad to
rethink who you are.
"I'm not sure, sweetheart. I'm not sure what I'm going
to do at all."
He'd set Lindsay up to be captured and taken for
execution, and not even spoken to her since. He'd pushed propaganda for
one alien power and then helped a minister from another one defy his
government. He'd helped the wess'har develop a bioweapon.
Eddie wondered what might be left of him when he put
his camera down.
Shan didn't like herself much today. She had
fewer days like these as the years wore on, but this morning she felt
like a woman in the most negative sense she could imagine. She was
messing men around. It was silly and girly and she should have known
better.
She leaned against the wall of the washroom and let the
single jet of cold water play on the top of her head by way of penance.
It wasn't the physical stuff that bothered her as much as the voice
deep in her brain that was still saying slut,
slut, slut. She had never thought less of Nevyan for having four
males, so why couldn't she extend that tolerance to herself?
Because you're still wired to
believe that the best thing you can give a male is your exclusivity.
It wasn't. She could see that simply by looking at Aras
and Ade eating breakfast, becoming increasingly… synchronized.
The brother bond was as almost as important as the male-female
relationship, and now she could see that more clearly than ever.
Watching Nevyan's household--quarrelsome, affectionate,
apparently chaotic--was seeing aliens, interesting but separate
creatures however much she admired and liked them. But this bonding was
happening in front of her to people whose reactions and attitudes she
knew intimately, and they were changing.
Aras took some gurut from the range and
Ade placed a tray under them as if by reflex. They were an instant
team. They knew how to fit in with each other now.
And all she had to do was join that team, and
everything would be fine. She didn't want to think the word family.
It had no positive connotations for her.
"You approve of the boots, then," said Aras.
"Yes, just the job."
"Shapakti has called again."
Shan crunched on an overcooked piece of gurut.
"Ade, you didn't bite his head off, did
you?"
"Aras dealt with him."
"And I was most respectful."
"Okay," said Shan. "I'd better go and see what he
wants. Are you sure there's nothing else you two want to discuss with
me?"
Aras and Ade glanced at each other and shrugged, and
Shan wondered if she was beginning to deal with a double act. They
smelled a little agitated. Perhaps that was how wess'har males always
behaved; she'd have to ask Nevyan for advice again, if she was in a
better frame of mind today. Time was when she could do no wrong in
Nevyan's eyes, or in Eddie's, come to that; and now she worried she
could do nothing right.
But at least her jurej've
thought she was okay. And that was what mattered. She gave Aras a
playful swat that got no response and left to call on Da Shapakti.
It was a gray miserable day outside, the sort she
actually liked. And it wasn't just raining. The drops pecked at her
face, turning into sleet, a very rare thing indeed for F'nar. The
pearl-shit icing on the elegant organic swirls and curves of the city
looked like ice. It was the sort of day to come home to an indulgent
tea by the fireside, and for a brief moment she actually missed home.
You must be joking. The
apartment had five alarm systems and you only used one side of the bed.
Don't kid yourself that you abandoned a haven.
Shapakti probably didn't run to toasted pikelets spread
with lavender jelly. Lavender. Aras had
planted lavender, and so all she needed was something sugary that would
set into a gel. It was a noble project and one she intended to devote
herself to when the current situation calmed down. She was still
wondering whether jay fruit might be a
suitable medium when she walked into the scattered camp of ship
fragments in search of Shapakti.
He seemed surprised that she had bothered to come and
see him.
"Do you have time now?" Shapakti always kept at a safe
distance from her, a good clear meter. Now she had stepped down off the
roller coaster of aggression, she realized what a stroppy bitch she
must have seemed to him. Poor bugger: he was just doing his job,
probably as dismayed as she had been at being diverted elsewhere, and
missing his family. "It really is most important, and it is personal."
With or without the Eqbas, this was going to be her
home for a very, very long time. She wondered why she had ever thought
otherwise. And Ade had no more choice than she had, and neither did
Aras, so all she had to do was shake off one more redundant attitude
and get on with life.
"Certainly, son," she said. "Tell me all about it."
The request wasn't unreasonable, but it made
Nevyan uneasy. She stood in the forest of lava plugs out on the F'nar
plain and wondered how visible a small Eqbas settlement might be.
"It would look much like Surang," said Esganikan.
"No, it would be coated in tem
deposits in a very short time."
"Very well, it would be covered in pearl.
It would be disguised somewhat by the lava formations, and it would be temporary."
Nevyan understood why the Eqbas wanted the comfort of a
built settlement. Adaptable as their ships were, the environment was
still limited. They longed for the surroundings of home. But it alarmed
her because it brought them both a step closer together, and Targassat
had been adamant that it was a life they should shun.
It had worked so well for so long.
"We won't intrude," said Esganikan. "We understand."
Nevyan imagined the billowing shapes robed in
iridescence. But it would be demolished in time, and F'nar had built
the Temporary City on Bezer'ej so she had no moral grounds for refusing
this. "I asked for your military support. It's only reasonable that we
should make your lives as easy as we can."
"So we'll begin," said Esganikan.
Nevyan thought of fetching Eddie to watch the
beginnings of the settlement, to record the buildings constructing
themselves out of the raw materials around them. Aras had said the
original gethes city on Ouzhari--the one
he
had removed long before the colonists arrived--had been built in a
similar way from the land itself, but with visible machines. Humans had
their technical limitations. She called home and asked Giyadas to see
if the journalist felt up to venturing out. Nevyan suspected it was his
conscience that was still injured, because his head wound was healing
quite well.
"We all miss home, and no doubt the gethes
do too," said Esganikan. She scuffed her
boot in the gold soil as if checking it for some quality or
characteristic. "We brought back some Earth vegetation from Umeh
Station for Shapakti's colleagues to examine. They want to create a
small terrestrial environment to gain skills in restoring Earth."
"And where might they create this?"
"You have space in your hangars beneath F'nar."
"If you wish to use that…"
"Again, it would be temporary. When we depart for
Earth, it can be dismantled."
Nevyan wondered if Shan and Ade might like the
environment to remain to ease a longing for home. Shan had never shown
signs of missing Earth, although she had made much of being deprived of
her favorite boots, but Ade Bennett seemed a more sentimental person. Jurej've
deserved to be kept happy.
"Proceed," said Nevyan.
She knew what it was like to miss home. She was
beginning to feel on foreign territory already.
"Are you sure about this, Shapakti?" Shan found
her arms had crossed themselves tightly on her chest almost without her
noticing, just the way they did when an interrogation wasn't yielding
answers as fast as she wanted. "Absolutely
sure?"
"It is possible," said
Shapakti. "I have only modeled the procedure based on the specimen you
provided. The bond between the organism and proteins is tenacious, but
it appears to be reversible. I believe we can remove c'naatat
without harming the organism." He
looked at her as if she had scolded him. "We would of course place the
symbionts back in the soil in Ouzhari."
He must have misinterpreted her dismay. She heard the
words remove c'naatat and her stomach
flipped over. No. No, it couldn't be this
way, not now.
She thought of how she yelled and raged at Aras when
she realized he had infected her to save her life. If she'd been
offered the choice then, she would have grabbed it without a second
thought. She had her plans in those days. She'd wanted
to go home. She'd picked out a remote smallholding on the border with
the Cymru Republic, somewhere to grow her illegal unpatented tomatoes,
and she was getting out of EnHaz because she had done a lifetime's duty
and it was time for her.
Then Eugenie Perault had intervened.
They were alone in the dark little bubble of ship that
Shapakti had made his home. The bulkheads shimmered with status reports
and images; one picture, a live one as far as Shan could tell, was of a
billowing Eqbas building that looked like a galleon on a stick. She
suspected it might be Shapakti's hometown. He was like anyone in
uniform, decorating his locker with comforting pictures of cherished
people and places.
History. You can't change a
thing now.
"What about the host?" Shan asked. "Selfish
preoccupation, but I need to know."
"As far as I can tell without using live specimens, the
hosts would revert to their original genome."
Now she didn't want the choice. Is
this me? Is this what I want? And why? And then she didn't know
if it was her opinion or if it was c'naatat
urging her.
If it was influencing her, it was sentient.
The panic that threatened to make itself obvious to
Shapakti felt as bad as stepping into space and feeling that total,
searing cold that felt white-hot. What was inside her? And if it wasn't
the parasite talking, what did she prize about being a host? She
started to face the possibility that she wasn't simply being good old
resilient Shan, always able to brace her shoulders and make the best of
a bad job. She had to consider that she might enjoy being as close to a
god as a pragmatic, disbelieving woman ever could.
She didn't have much time for gods. They were either
absent or incompetent. She wasn't sure if it was a good idea to get too
used to being one.
Then another sickening thought almost cut her legs from
under her.
She hadn't even thought about Aras.
"What's wrong?" asked Shapakti.
"Have you worked out if you can remove c'naatat
from a wess'har?"
"We don't yet know. It's possible."
"So… Aras could look forward to some sort of normal
life, then." She swallowed hard. It took all her conscious will not to
flood the room with the scent of her own anxiety. She lapsed into
detached language. "He could be free to reproduce."
"If the organism can be separated from him, yes."
You're looking for an excuse.
It was almost a disembodied voice in her head. For the
first time in her adult life, she didn't know exactly what she thought,
what she believed, and what she wanted. There were no absolutes and no
certainties.
Shapakti looked into her face, pupils snapping open and
closed. Even if he couldn't smell her it was obvious that he knew the
news had knocked her for six. "But you would like to go home, wouldn't
you? I would. I have been away a long time. I want to see my isan
and my house-brothers and our children
again. I thought you would too."
Shan thought of Reading Metro and the admin workload
and the gridlock riots and coming home to an empty apartment. Then she
thought of the Wessex National Park and fried egg sandwiches and how
large a plot of land her long-frozen pension would now buy.
"Who else knows about this?" she asked.
"My team, of course, and Esganikan--"
"Do me a favor. It's speculation as far as I'm
concerned. You don't tell Ade or Aras. Not yet. That's my job.
Understand?"
"Very well. But I thought this would please you."
She stood up and made for the hatch. "You've done a
good job. But it's a choice I didn't think I'd ever be able to make."
"I am sorry for angering you. But they say you are a
competent matriarch, able to make very hard decisions."
Shan stood on the threshold where coaming would have
been on a normal ship, and felt the sleet against her face softening
into snow.
"Well, they were wrong," she said.
I miss you. It's
very wonderful here, very strange, and there are so many different
types of people and plants that I sometimes forget myself and stop
missing you all for a moment. But when I close my eyes to rest, there
you are again. It's been too long. I will bring marvelous things back
for you. I will let you know as soon as I have a departure date, so you
can all plan a period in suspension. Thank you for waiting for me.
DA SHAPAKTI, to his isan Jamurian Ve,
his
house-brothers, and the beloved children of the clan
The snow was knee-deep. Wess'har didn't
like the cold but a few brave souls had ventured out into the fields,
swathed in layer upon layer of sek. Aras,
who didn't suffer in cold weather and had been raised in Baral, took it
in his stride. Shan could see him clearly through the scope of Ade's
rifle.
"I hope he doesn't get the wrong idea," said Ade,
taking the rifle back from her. "It isn't even loaded."
Shan sat on the top of the plateau next to her
memorial, arms around her knees, and savored the exceptionally rare
snowscape that ran across the ship camp of the Eqbas Vorhi mission to
the city itself. A layer of snow on top of the pearl made F'nar look
like a nostalgic window-dresser's rendering of a fairytale winter.
"What do you think of that, Ade?"
The growing Eqbas settlement, tucked discreetly into a
stone forest of volcanic plugs, had begun to remind Shan of a wasps'
nest. A slim base emerged from the ground and the structure was
beginning to flare out from it, reaching into the air like an oyster
mushroom just like the buildings of Surang. It was free of snow: they
must have been using some sort of environmental barrier, and it was
warm behind it, because tem flies had
already begun polishing it with a pretty layer of iridescent shit. They
swarmed to hot climates for the winter but some were still here and
seemed to have been caught unawares by the weather like everyone else.
Ade puffed little clouds of condensed breath. Shan
reminded herself to breathe again.
"Ade, have you thought about it?"
"I still think you should tell Aras right now."
"I asked if you had
thought about it."
"Yeah, I have."
"You could be back to normal and going home. Wife,
kids, the whole thing."
Ade had never been much good at hiding his feelings.
Now he wore his expression of suppressed disgust, lips clamped tight
and pupils wide. "How can you say that when you know what normal was
for me?" His automatic camou-flage jacket was now stark white with
faint swirls of pale gray and blue, merging him with his background
like an Arctic hare. He seemed perfectly adapted. So
this is what he really does. He's a mountain and arctic warfare expert.
"I didn't have a wife and kids and every woman I ever loved walked out
on me. I'm coming up forty and I've been kicked out of the Corps. So
everything I've got is here, even if they take every alien cell out of
me."
"I was just asking. I didn't want you to feel that you
didn't have a choice."
"You don't see yourself ever being my isan,
do you?"
It was odd to hear him use the wess'har term. "Ade, I
just thought it might all be a combination of a crush and loneliness on
your part."
"Oh, and there was I thinking you didn't feel sorry for
me."
"I thought you might see things differently if you
could go home. You don't have to stay. Take c'naatat
out and you could--"
"This is home."
"I'm sorry. I had to ask, just in case."
"Okay, do you want to have
c'naatat taken out? Do you want to be
regular Shan Frankland again?"
She'd asked herself that over and over again ever since
Shapakti had told her it was possible. The answer had been immediate: no.
It was a gut reaction. She still didn't know
if it was the parasite colony talking, making a desperate bid to stay
inside its host.
"No, I don't," she said. "And perhaps that's why I
should go back to being a basic human. There's nothing worse than a
bastard like me with a bit too much power. Maybe I need stopping right
now."
Ade shut his eyes for a moment and she thought he was
going to erupt. She knew he had been raised on violence and she knew it
was within him; but she didn't want to see it emerge, not because of
her and a few stupid comments.
But he simply opened his eyes again and gave her a
smile that was utterly heartbreaking. "That's why I think the world of
you. You're a fundamentally good person in a way almost nobody ever is.
You think I can just pack my bag and leave, do you?"
"Stop it, for Chrissakes." She squirmed. "I know
exactly what I am. Good doesn't come into it. You ought to bloody know,
too. You've got enough of my memory now."
"Being good isn't always about being soft."
Stop it. "Come on, you
miss Earth."
His lips compressed again. She wasn't getting anything
out of him. "We've all got responsibilities here, but I'll go along
with whatever decision you make. You're still the Boss."
"Great. Just great. That's
a big fucking help."
"You still have to tell Aras. Where does that leave
him?"
"Shapakti doesn't know if it'll work on wess'har. I
don't want to get his hopes up."
"And if they can, you think he'll want to breed more
than he wants you?"
"Possibly."
"You can't believe that. I've inherited some of his
thoughts. So have you."
"So let's see what he thinks when he's got all the
facts."
"He's going to go fucking ballistic when he finds out
you kept this from him. If you don't tell him, he's going to pick it up
from your memory sooner or later. I'd hate to find out that way. Tell
him before he takes Rayat and Lindsay back to Bezer'ej."
They went back to staring at the snow. Genies didn't
fit back into bottles easily. And she wasn't sure how she'd feel if
Aras was given the same choice and then took it.
She'd almost grown used to the status of an isan:
she liked being adored, even if she knew that it was as much a
biological mechanism as an emotional one.
C'naatat was showing her
all the things she really didn't like about herself.
She got up and they walked back down the easy path from
the plateau and down onto the plain again. Even 150 trillion miles from
home, snow had lost none of its clean, quiet wonder.
"Want to build a snowman?" Ade asked.
She smiled. He was his old self again, trying to raise
morale like a good sergeant should. "As long as we flatten it
afterwards. Nothing intrudes on the landscape, remember."
And they built a snowman, laughing and pelting each
other with hard-packed, vicious snowballs that almost burned when they
caught bare skin. Shan stuck a stylus in the expressionless face to
make a nose. There was never a carrot and a couple of pieces of coal
around when you needed them.
"I've never seen you laugh like that," said Ade.
"I've never built a snowman."
"No?"
"I didn't really have a childhood."
"I can tell. Me neither."
"Oh." She glanced over his shoulder and he turned to
see what she was looking at. "Shapakti."
The Eqbas scientist was walking unsteadily through the
snow, the swathe of fabric across his face reminding her of the cowl of
his biohaz suit. He made a few placatory bobs of his head and stopped
to do a head-tilting stare at the snowman.
"Is this religious?" he said.
"No, and don't even mention it to the colonists if you
meet them," Shan reached out and knocked the head off the figure,
embarrassed. Ade retrieved the stylus. "You've got some news for me,
haven't you?"
"I have something to show you--both of you. Somewhere
much warmer."
"Sounds good to me," said Ade.
Shapakti turned and began walking back towards F'nar.
Shan and Ade trampled the rest of the snowman back into featureless
oblivion before catching him up.
"Why did you traipse all the way out here to find me?"
she asked. "I've got a virin."
"You don't always answer," said Shapakti. "And I think
you like plenty of warning of my interruptions."
It was Ade's first visit to the underground bunkers
that housed F'nar's fighter craft and assorted weapons. He stopped to
admire a vessel, but Shan took his arm and dragged him gently away.
"You can play with that later." Shapakti led them through the maze of
passages and they came to an opening that spilled bright light in
exactly the same way that the subterranean colony of Constantine had
when she had first ventured down into its heart.
"This was taken from Umeh Station," said Shapakti, and
opened the hatch.
Hot moist air hit her face and she could taste
greenness and life on the oxygen-rich air.
Home, her body said. Home.
Maybe it wasn't Reading Metro, but it was Earth.
Rainforest vines and exotic greenery
filled the chamber like some Victorian hothouse that had been shipped
out to amuse an eccentric guest. Eddie was wandering about inside,
stroking his fingers over the shiny emerald leaves.
"You okay?" said Shan.
"I'm fine," he said.
"I'm sorry about Ual. I never had chance to meet him,
and I regret that."
"Yeah." He was subdued, not Normal Eddie at all. She
didn't plan to divert any time to soothing him right then. She had
enough on her plate as it was. "You can have your ballistic vest back
now."
Shapakti beckoned them further inside and dug both
hands into the ground, scooping up dark soil.
"This was the hardest part," he said. "We recreated
terrestrial soil and some bacteria. It is far from ideal but the plants
show every sign of surviving. They were grown in a fluid nutrient
solution in Umeh Station."
"You're a clever boy, Shapakti." Shan took off her
jacket. The air was tropically hot. "What now?"
"The gene bank," he said.
"What about it?"
"You said I might have access, with your supervision of
course. I would like to see what we can achieve."
Shapakti was quite literally harmless. She knew he
would do nothing to damage or exploit the contents of that precious
store. He was even planning to put extracted c'naatat
organisms back on Ouzhari; he was everything she could trust.
"Lovely," said Ade, closing his eyes and inhaling
deeply. "Bit too quiet though. Jungle's all noise. I've done jungle."
"I shall find a single species to resurrect," said
Shapakti. Shan thought it was a strange choice of words. "And its food
sources."
"Better make it a herbivore or something, then." It was
just a display of potted plants. It was quick familiarity when her
guard was battered and falling, not a mystic sign she should go home
again. "Want any help?"
"I would like access to databases on jungle."
"Umeh must have downloaded databanks, and if you ask
the UN nicely they might put you in touch with biologists…on Earth."
Shit, she nearly said back home. It was
getting too seductive. "Eddie's got a fair old library too, haven't
you?"
"I have," said Eddie. "You're welcome to what I've got.
And if you get through to the UN, they'll panic and wonder exactly
where you're planning to invade if you ask too many questions about
tropical environments. Try the Pacific Rim States. They think you're
the cavalry."
"Maybe they are," said Shan.
"Saddle up, then," said Eddie, and walked out through
the hatch.
Aras rested his head on his folded arms and
stared along the faint grain of the table. He thought of the bezeri and
wondered how much longer he could delay giving them his decision.
His duty was to go to them and help, but his wess'har
instinct said his isan came first. What
was it like to live under water, anyway? What could he give the bezeri,
other than reassurance and an extra hand?
It was unthinkable to refuse them, and unthinkable to
leave Shan even if Ade would be there to care for her.
I want my isan. I
want Shan. I waited so long for this.
The door opened and he sat up sharply. Shan and Ade
walked in, dripping slush from their boots and flushed from the walk in
the cold air.
"Shapakti's built a rain forest," said Shan. "He's a
clever little bugger." She paused. "What's wrong?"
"You startled me," said Aras. "I was thinking."
Ade went to boil water for tea. "Shan's got some news
for you." He shot her a glance and she glared back at him. "Go on. Tell
him."
She was suddenly angry: Aras could see that from her
dilated pupils. She sighed air from her nose, irritated, and Ade
suddenly smelled of anxiety. She wasn't happy about what he'd said.
"Okay, I'll apologize before I start," she said, and
sat down at the table without removing her jacket. "Ade says Ishould
have told you a few days ago. He's right. But I still don't have all
the facts."
Aras waited.
"It's c'naatat," she said
at last. "Shapakti thinks it can be removed from the host organism."
Aras stopped his thoughts racing ahead. He had heard
this before, many years ago, when wess'har had found out what c'naatat
was and that it did more than
accelerate recovery. They thought they could stop it. And they had been
wrong.
"Has he tested this theory?"
Shan scratched her forehead, looking down at the
table's surface for a few moments. "He's separated it from a sample of
my tissue."
"Ah."
"Go on. I know what you're going to ask."
"No need. I haven't given him a sample of my
tissue. So he can't prove the same claim for
the wess'har genome."
"I know. Are you going to give him a specimen?"
"Why should I?"
"It would solve the problem of accidental contamination
if removal was possible."
"No," said Aras. "That's not what you mean at all.
Don't lie to me. I told you once that you were a very poor liar, isan,
and you have still learned nothing of the
skill."
She sat looking at him and then got up and put her arms
around him from behind. "It might be possible." She laid her cheek
against his. He reached up and clasped her arms, thinking he might push
her away rather than embrace her. "It's not definite, not by a long
chalk. But I had to tell you."
"Why?"
She hesitated. He still couldn't smell any scent at all
beyond her skin, sweet wood overlaid with female musk. "Because I want
to know what you really want."
He could measure the time that he had wanted to be a
normal wess'har again in centuries. The
thought had obsessed him for years, so many years that it was
impossible to explain to any other being--even Shan--just how
overwhelming and intense and sustained
that emotion was. He thought he wanted to be a father more than
anything he could imagine.
And then he met Shan: and he made a rash, split-second
choice to save her life and the agony of not fulfilling his instinctive
biological purpose had eased so much that it was merely occasional
pain, and one that he could brush aside by being with her.
Now he had a house-brother too, more or less. And they
might learn to be content, and it didn't really matter that he had no
children.
"Do you want to go home?" he asked. "Earth?"
Still no scent. She was sparing his feelings. "For the
first time in my life, I have no idea what I think."
"You could go home. So could Ade."
"And you might have children. You can never have them
with me, with or without c'naatat. That's
one never we're certain about. If I stay a
carrier, there can't be more of us. If I revert to normal, we can't
reproduce anyway."
Aras knew exactly what he wanted. He didn't dare say so
and influence her. He hadn't given her a choice about c'naatat,
and she hadn't given Ade one either.
They weren't bound by any obligation at all. But he had no right to
think about his own happiness when the bezeri were still waiting for
him to help them.
"I would very much want you to be happy," he said, and
tried to keep his grip on her forearms neutral, neither letting go--a
sure sign he was upset at the idea--or by gripping harder, and making
it
clear he didn't want her to leave.
"As long as I'm c'naatat,
I'm staying here," she said. "I can never go home as long as I'm a
biohazard, whatever countermeasures Shapakti thinks they can create."
She's going to leave me.
"You must make your own choice," said Aras. "It's too
important for me to influence you and Ade either way."
She can go back to Earth as a
normal woman and do what she planned to. She can have Ade and she can
have her patch of land, and she can put the last few years behind her.
I took that away from her once.
"You think about it," she said, and kissed the top of
his head. "There's plenty of time."
No, for once she was wrong. Time had suddenly run out.
FROM:
Esganikan Gai, Eqbas Vorhi fleet
TO:
Marie-Claude Garces, Secretary General of the United Nations
We have been
made aware that the order to use persistent toxins on Bezer'ej was
given by senior ministers and intelligence officers of the Federal
European Union. Under your own laws, these individuals are war
criminals and so we hold you to the obligation to arrest and punish
them for their acts of genocide and environmental destruction. Anyone
able to detain them must do so. If no action is taken, we willfind out
who did not act, and when we reach Earth we will hold all of them
responsible for failing to take the appropriate measures of a civilized
society.
The atmosphere over lunch was tense. Shan
had always been one to speak her mind, but she wasn't forthright now.
She sat tapping her glass spoon against the bottom of the bowl.
Aras watched her discreetly from his peripheral vision.
Ade wouldn't meet her eyes either. Eventually she got up and washed the
bowl and spoon before pulling on her jacket.
"I'm going for a walk," she said, and didn't wait for a
response.
The door closed. Ade counted visibly to ten, the time
it took for her to stride out of earshot. The crunch of her boots faded.
"Aras, I swear to God, I'm not pressuring her."
Aras believed him. His face was pure distress. "You
don't believe in God."
"Look, I'll go. I can't do this."
"You will sit quietly and listen
to me."
Ade's shoulders braced almost imperceptibly. He was
still instinctively ready to defend himself. "What do you want, Aras?"
"I want to see Shan content. She can't be content if
she feels pulled by conflicting duties." He was clear now. It would be
agony but it needed to be done, and the sooner the better. "I'll tell
you something now that you must not tell
her."
"Whoa, no--"
"She'll find out, but I want that to be after she can
no longer act on the information."
"You can't lie to her."
"Oh, I've learned some useful human skills. I can lie
by omission, and I can lie by false statements. I'm almost a competent
human."
"I'm not promising anything."
"I'll hunt you down if you distress her by revealing
this."
"Mate, I've been threatened and beaten until I pissed
my pants. You think you can do any better at scaring me than my dad
did?"
"Listen."
Aras got up and walked round behind Ade, grabbing him
by the shoulders. It was just to make him stay sitting, to make him
listen; but Ade threw off the grip and wheeled round on Aras, sending
the bench flying, and slammed him against the nearest wall. He was
astonishingly strong for his height. Aras stared down at him, shocked
by the instant white-faced anger he was looking at.
"Don't ever fucking touch
me like that, okay? Ever." Ade's face
flushed. He let go of Aras's tunic and stepped back. "Just don't." His
voice trailed off. He righted the bench again to sit and focus on his
bowl of stew.
"I'm sorry," said Aras. There were things he didn't
know about Ade at all and could only guess. He certainly knew about his
violent father, and his shame for leaving his mother undefended as soon
as he was old enough to join the marines. The old emotions seemed very
near the surface. "I have to tell you this. The bezeri have asked me to
live among them. I know Shan could go home as a normal human being and
that you would look after her. If I choose to do what I ought for the
bezeri, then she needn't feel she has to stay for my sake."
Ade looked up from the bowl and his mouth really was
slightly open. Aras wondered why shock did that to humans. It was as if
they were trying to taste the air because they didn't trust their
hearing. "That would destroy her," Ade said quietly. "How can you even
think of doing that? She loves you."
"And I love her, and that's the normal wess'har way,
but Shapakti has changed that. I feared she would prefer you to me, as
her own kind. Now I wish she would."
Ade lowered his head a little. His eyes were closed. "I'm the
interloper. You can't do this because of me. And it's just a
theory--"
"I've made up my mind."
"You're wrong. You're so
wrong."
"I plan to take Rayat and Neville to the bezeri, as
they asked, so that they can deal with them. And I'll stay. I want you
to promise me that you'll explain to her why I did this and then take
proper care of her while she adjusts."
"The fuck I will." Ade's voice sounded as if he had
swallowed something uncomfortably hot. "Adjust?
I know she doesn't look like the emotional type, but you'll hurt her.
It'll rip the guts out of her."
"And maybe that's what it will take." Ade went to
protest again, but Aras held up both hands. "You can't prevent this."
Ade didn't speak again. Aras began imagining how he
might adjust to a life alone again, and in an environment more alien
than he had ever known, but he knew he could
adapt. He would cope.
The one thing he would never be able to cope with,
though, was not being able to take his leave of Shan properly, and
explain himself. He would walk out of her life with every indication
that he would return again, and it would be the hardest thing he had
ever done.
But he could lie now.
Mar'an'cas had taken on a distinctly purposeful
air in the last week. Lindsay walked through the camp trying not to
stare through open tent flaps, but she wanted to see what was happening.
Yes, the colonists knew they were going home. For all
the privation and tragedy that they had been through in the past few
months they seemed uplifted, and as much as the word nauseated her it
was the only one that fitted their collective mood.
And it was nearly Christmas.
Christmas was one of those public holidays like Eid,
Solstice, Hanukah and Diwali that had once interrupted her planning
schedule because staff went on leave. That was all. Seeing it marked
now by Christians who genuinely believed it was spiritually significant
was both moving and frightening. And it still left her feeling like an
alien.
Inside every tent was a light of some kind: a candle, a
solar lamp, anything that created fire. In the charcoal gloom of an
early northern winter, it looked reassuring and magical.
When she passed Deborah Garrod's tent she glanced away
but the woman called to her.
"Lin," she called. "Lin, come in and have a drink. You
must be frozen."
Deborah was simply a kind woman. She'd helped her
through David's birth and she'd been there in the infirmary when he
died. She knew what it was to lose someone she loved, too. Lindsay
paused, then ducked into the tent.
"How have you been?" asked Deborah.
"I think you know."
Lindsay sipped the tea she offered. Its taste was
irrelevant: it was hot, and that was wonderful. She felt like a fool
because everyone knew she had tried to drown herself and that she had
failed as surely as she had failed at everything else.
At least Deborah wouldn't ask her where she was
planning to spend Christmas this year.
"You've had a terrible time, Lin."
"So have the bezeri."
"You didn't know."
"It was a bomb. I know what bombs do. The rest was
detail."
"I understand a little of what you're going through.
However awful it seems, there really is purpose, but you have to look
at it from some distance to understand it."
"And God's the distance, right?"
"What do you think?"
"I think I've helped kill tens of thousands of sentient
beings and focused the attention of an alien war fleet on Earth. If
I've missed anything out, let me know."
"The bezeri have asked for you and Rayat to be handed
over to them."
"I--I didn't know that. I thought they might as soon as
I knew some had survived."
I'll drown anyway, then, or the
pathogen will get me. Unless I ask the unaskable. What have I got to
lose?
They went on drinking tea. Rachel, far more sober as a
six-year-old than she had been at five, slipped into the tent with a
battered handful of foliage.
"Decorations," she said quietly. She held them up on
tiptoe, trying them against the ridge of the tent, and then dropped
them in Deborah's lap. "We're going back to Earth, aren't we?"
"Yes, you are." Lindsay held out her arms to her and
the child hesitated for a moment and looked to Deborah for approval
before scrambling on to her lap. "You'll like it."
"You're not like Shan."
"Absolutely." As if she needed reminding. Shan never
got in over her head or did anything without covering all the angles.
Emotions never tore her apart. Lindsay struggled to put aside her fear
and forced a smile. "What do you want for Christmas, then?"
"I want Daddy to come home," she said. "Or Aras."
Kids had a stunning sense of proportion. Deborah said
nothing. She fidgeted on Lindsay's lap and finally wriggled to the
floor and skipped out again.
"That's what makes it hard," said Deborah.
Just being with Deborah was soothing in its way.
Deborah didn't berate her or remind her of her failings. She just sat
there and drank tea with her.
"What do you want?" she
asked.
"To make things a little better. Perhaps I got my
punishment before I committed my crime, by losing David, but it doesn't
feel like that."
"If you won't ask God what's required of you, then you
might ask the bezeri."
Lindsay gazed into the cup and realized she had been
told something profound. Lancing this boil of misery would take more
than just dying. She needed to hear what her victims thought of her.
And maybe she could find a way to help the survivors.
Be certain you don't just want
to stay alive at any cost.
Bezeri had faces. She knew that: they had eyes, like
terrestrial cephalopods. All she had to do was to somehow look into
them. But that meeting was a world away.
The wess'har would be coming for her. They would send
Aras, as they always did, because the bezeri knew him and spoke to him.
She would ask him, and hope that he understood that she wanted to share
c'naatat not because she was afraid to die
but because she was afraid for the first time that death would not be
the end.
"I'd like to pray," said Lindsay, and could hardly
believe her own words. And they were utterly sincere. "Please, Deborah,
help me out here. It's hard for a mass murderer to know where to start."
The snow had stopped and the novelty had worn
off even for the hardiest of F'nar's citizens. There was nobody out on
the terraces tonight: lights shone from irregular, wound-like windows
across the span of the caldera. It was really pretty. Ade liked it here.
He waited for a few moments before opening the door,
listening carefully in case he interrupted a difficult moment. But Shan
was sitting on that blue sofa that didn't fit in with any of the
wess'har furniture, one leg tucked beneath her, head propped on her
hand while she watched the shifting pattern of the screen on the wall.
"It's a brawl at the UN tonight," she said, not looking
at him. "I'm waiting to see the African Assembly bloke slug the FEU
delegate. He's close. I think he's got the form to take him. About five
kilos, I'd say."
A humorous Shan was a nervous and unhappy Shan
whistling in the dark. Ade slid off his jacket and fired up the range
to reheat the stew. The white glass slab radiated heat immediately.
"Where's Aras?"
"Talking to Shapakti before they deliver the prisoners
to Bezer'ej."
"Did you have a fight?"
"No. He just seems very subdued." She switched off the
screen. "I've tried convincing him none of this is going to change
things. He'll come round."
Ade sat down next to her and offered his shoulder. She
yielded slightly and settled into him almost as if they were already
lovers rather than simply circling each other, nervous of the final
step. There was nothing he could do. He wanted to blurt out everything,
but she'd go storming after Aras and then there would be continual
arguments. He didn't want that.
Besides, Ade had made up his own mind.
Earth didn't beckon him half as much as wanting to be
with Shan and Aras. He felt a kinship now with the wess'har that was as
strong as the sense of family in the Corps, and it wasn't just his
burgeoning wess'har genes that were anchoring him. Aras was a soldier,
an abandoned soldier, a man who knew what
duty meant and what it was to be expendable.
And Ade knew he was in the way. And he didn't deserve
any happiness, not after helping Lindsay destroy Ouzhari. It was time
he paid for all the people he'd let down in his life-- his mum, Dave
Pharoah, and the bezeri.
"You really made this sofa?" he said, struggling to
stay off the subject.
"Yeah." She looked into his face. "What color is it?"
"Blue," he said.
She managed a grin. "Wess'har vision."
"It's incongruous. But comfortable."
"Yeah, that's a good word. Incongruous."
He checked himself. It wasn't a word he'd used before.
He wasn't stupid, but he didn't use words for a living like Eddie did,
and he wasn't as intelligent as Shan. He realized c'naatat
was changing him in more subtle ways than he imagined.
"I'm going to go with Aras and hand over Lin and Rayat.
I'm the one who took the bloody bombs there so--"
"I really don't need this now. Not again, Ade."
"I knew they stood a chance of getting used. So I'm
guilty."
"Motive doesn't matter here. Just outcomes. How many
times do we have to go over this?"
"So what about inept criminals?" he asked. "You try to
be a murderer or a rapist or a thief or something, but you just can't
manage the job. Does that make you innocent?"
Shan was silent. Then she made a slight uff
noise that could have been a laugh or an
expression of contempt.
"I'm buggered if I can answer that."
She fell silent again and he could see her jaw muscles
working, her eyes slightly defocused. God, he'd stunned her with
something clever. He reveled in the
moment, not because he'd beaten her at something but because he had
surfaced briefly in her intellectual league, and he wondered if she
might love him for that. It was rare common ground, more heady than the
one-of-the-lads feeling of both being in uniform. But now winning her
affection didn't matter. He couldn't stay and prompt Aras into leaving.
He needed to stop her feeling obligated to him.
She shook her head at last. "No, you've got me there.
That's quite a question. Do you have an answer?"
"It still makes you guilty, because one day you might
try it again and succeed. It's about… potential."
She turned her head slowly. "You do the simple soldier
routine perfectly, but you're fucking smart, aren't you?"
"No. Not at all."
"Well, Hawking, wrap your IQ round this. What's the
right thing I need to do for Aras? And you?"
"What about you?"
"I'll cope with whatever comes down the road. You know
me."
Ade had managed brief excursions into Shan's mind since
his infection and what he saw was the headlines, the big events that
wouldn't leave her alone. But every day he saw new facets and they were
much more emotional than people imagined.
He wondered when the memory of being spaced might
surface in him. She'd bitten him and drawn blood: he expected it to
well up any day now, and the prospect scared him.
He shared a plate of netun
with her and respected the silence. With or without c'naatat,
he loved her. Restored to normality,
he wouldn't care about her any less than he had when he'd first seen
her swing through that hatch, reassuring and in command, or when she'd
treated him like a hero even though he crapped himself, or when she put
his medals back in his pocket. He wondered what life might be like back
on predictable Earth as a clever woman's bit of rough. It would be an
Earth where they'd both be as alien as the Eqbas.
And he wondered what Aras might feel like as one of
those weirdly likeable sea horses again, with none of the human genes
that had made him what he was now. Maybe Aras wouldn't miss him and
Shan at all: and maybe he would be devastated beyond Ade's capacity to
imagine.
It was all a matter of what was right. Ade had a better
idea of that now.
He'd spare her the explanation. He was never her real jurej,
after all.
Let others praise
ancient times; I am glad I was born in these.
OVID
"Oh," said Shan. "Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh."
Two macaws fluttered among the vines, turquoise and
saffron, looking like they weren't quite getting the hang of being
macaws. Their colors were impossibly bright and she had only ever seen
them on natural history programs, but they were as real as macaws could
ever be.
"Now that's a miracle,"
she said.
"I knew they would delight you." Shapakti had the same
air of embarrassed pride that Aras had displayed when he had first
shown her F'nar. There was something fundamental in the wess'har male
that needed to please a female. "They are
perfectly beautiful beings, aren't they?"
Shan craned her neck. "It's one thing to recreate an
arrangement of cells," she said. "But making it into a parrot that
knows how to fly and be a parrot is something else entirely." One of
the macaws made a crash landing on a branch and flapped, all screeching
panic. "Well, more or less."
"We found a great deal of data on macaws. We recreated
a virtual environment for them while we accelerated their growth."
"Instant parrot. I should hate this, but for some
reason I can't."
"A word of caution, chail.
Doing the same with each species in the gene bank will take a lifetime
and more. This isn't Earth. There is no ecosystem for them to slot into
and learn to be what they are."
"But the gene bank you take back to Earth will fit
right in,won't it?" She wanted Ade and Aras to see this. They would
love it. It was her first thought and then her second was that she
still didn't know what was the right thing to do for Aras. It took the
shine off a moment of pure wonder. "Even extinct species usually have a
niche to fit into on Earth and close relatives that can socialize them."
"I believe you were right to insist on retaining a
separate gene bank as--what is the word?"
"Insurance."
"Yes, insurance." He
clasped his long hands in front of him and wafted a scent of pure
contentment. He was good at his job and he knew it. "And they speak."
"Parrots? Yes, they really can talk. Took us a while to
realize that, and we didn't treat them any better for it, but yes, they
can use language."
"An Earth without humans."
"What brought that on?"
"You said it a number of times, as did Aras."
"I just don't like people much."
"But we are having talks with people just like you,
humans who are not gethes. Does that not
give you satisfaction?"
So the Australasians had the sense to front up some
vegan or environmentalist liaison. That was smart. "Only if I can shoot
the rest."
"Human life is worth less to you than the lives of any
other species."
"I'm a copper. You get that way after a few years."
"You have no more laws to enforce. How much longer will
you insist on being a copper?"
"God, you do sound like Aras sometimes."
"Have you made your decision?"
The macaws shrieked and settled down to groom each
other's plumage. It was hard to look at those exquisite birds and not
believe there was something wonderful to look forward to, an
extraordinary future for the planet she once saw as the entire universe.
Fast forward, she
thought: I'm back on Earth, all nice and cozy with Ade, and
I'm part of the new world order,
really putting into action all the things I truly believe in. It's
everything I thought I wanted. And then one night and look up at the
sky and I know Aras is out there, 150 trillion miles away. I know what
he'll be thinking. I know how he feels. I know exactly what he's
experienced, right up to the last time I slept with him.
"How are you getting on with separating c'naatat
from wess'har tissue?" asked Shan.
"I am beginning to think it is impossible," said
Shapakti. "Each time I achieve separation, c'naatat
survives but the host cells die. I will persist."
"Oh." Will I remember him? If
they take away c'naatat, will I really
think about him the way I do now? "Not looking good, is it?"
Shapakti held out his arms like a scarecrow and the
macaws flew to him.
"They think you're their mum," said Shan. "You'll have
a hard job returning them to the wild." Just like
me.
"We will enable them to have a normal life somehow."
Shapakti ran a cautious finger over one macaw's head. Both birds were
jostling for position on his arm, feathers rustling. One caught his
finger in its beak, more playful than aggressive, but Shan braced
herself for a scream anyway.
"Uk'alin'i che," said the
macaw, very clearly, and they both took off for the vines again. Feed
me. It was a regular Eqbas parrot, all
right.
Shan sat cross-legged and watched the macaws until she
smelled sandalwood overlaid with a little acid and Aras entered. He had
something in his hands, wrapped in a piece of fabric.
"For me?" She attempted a reassuring smile.
He sat down beside her and placed the object in her
hands. "The bezeri asked me to return this."
She could tell what it was even without unwrapping it.
The weight and shape were familiar. When she peeled back the fabric the
azin shell map was exactly as she
remembered it, a beautiful piece of sand art. And she knew it wasn't a
present. She turned it over in her hands and remembered how strongly
she'd felt she could honor her pledge to protect them.
"I can guess," she said, crushed, and wrapped it again.
Aras seemed to have developed Ade's habit of
compressing his lips briefly before saying something difficult. "They
said to tell you that your red line did not hold."
She'd promised them. She'd failed. "Is
that what's been upsetting you? Why didn't you say?"
Shapakti busied himself talking to the macaws. Aras
seemed distracted by them for a moment, his head tilted in curiosity.
Then he turned his head very deliberately to her. "I thought it might
upset you."
"I've got a thicker hide than Eddie, and that's saying
something," she said, and grinned. Maybe he'd be happier now that she'd
shown that she wasn't hurt by the bezeri's rebuke. By the time he found
out it was a front, she would be comfortable with it.
He reached out and slid his hand into hers, almost
edging his way as if she might round on him and hit him. She caught his
hand tightly. Now was as bad a time as any to tell him.
"Shapakti says they still can't remove c'naatat
from you."
He let out a breath, nothing more.
"It's okay, sweetheart," she said. "It doesn't change a
thing."
Aras couldn't suppress his scent like she could. But
smelling that acid-citrus fragrance didn't tell her why he was upset.
It could have been that he really wanted to be normal again more than
he wanted to be with her. If he did, she would have to accept that.
They were both aliens: it was an unlikely relationship born of
desperation. If it wasn't that, then she could only assume that he
feared she would take her opportunity to reverse events and go home.
She was, as she had been for days, torn between the life she had here
and her duty to Earth. EnHaz, as brief a job as it had been, was where
her soul lay if she had one at all.
She got to her feet and he scrambled upright beside
her, but his eyes were on the macaws.
"This is the first time I feel that I've seen a real
part of Earth," he said. "Not a farm, like Constantine, for the benefit
of gethes alone. This is the Earth that is
quite separate from humans, isn't it?"
"Yes," she said. "And there's so little of it left."
"You miss it."
"Good God, no. Reading Metro wasn't unspoiled rain
forest. This is as new to me as it is to you."
"Eugenie Perault would be most surprised to see all
this return to its rightful home," said Aras.
"Surprised?" said Shan. "I'll fucking bet."
She thought it would be good to visit Earth some time
in the future, after the Eqbas had completed what they set out to do.
By then, she might be able to return home safely.
No, it was Earth now. Just
Earth.
Nevyan took Giyadas to see the growing Eqbas
settlement. It was twice the height of an adult wess'har now, still
looking ludicrously fragile but getting larger nevertheless. As Nevyan
watched, she could see the gradual accumulation of particles building
on the fresh edge of the construction as the nanites labored to their
template, taking the soil from around them and converting it into a
building. There was nobody around. The city worked alone.
"I don't like it," said Giyadas. "Does it have to be
here?"
"I don't like it either. But if they are to help us, we
must help them."
"We'll become like them."
"Not if we remain true to our principles." Nevyan had
her own doubts. She wanted to withdraw permission. She felt she
couldn't. "And they're not alien to us, not at heart."
"Are they building a city on Bezer'ej?"
It was a good question. The isanket
had a sharp mind and was already confident and aggressive, an
encouraging signfor her future. "If they build there,
then they have no need to be here."
It was an excellent idea. Nevyan turned and Giyadas
followed her back to F'nar.
This was why her ancestors had parted company with
Eqbas Vorhi. It was all too unnatural, too ambitious, too predicated
upon continual expansion--and in that sense, it made them no better
than
the isenj or the gethes. The Eqbas managed
environments without harm, but they were still spreading gradually
throughout the galaxy, imposing their order--the correct order, but
still imposed--on other worlds.
All I wanted was for the
gethes threat to be contained. And now we are the
latest outpost of Eqbas Vorhi.
She would suggest that they might be better occupied in
building a temporary city on Bezer'ej, where the cleansing work still
had to be done and the handful of bezeri survivors needed watching. If
Shan joined her, the suggestion would become a demand that Esganikan
couldn't ignore.
When Nevyan reached Shan's home, the woman was lying on
her back on the terrace, hands clasped on her chest, with something
over her face. It looked like a visor. Giyadas nudged her and she took
it off.
"Sorry," said Shan. "Look what Shapakti's rigged up for
me." She held the visor out to Giyadas and showed her how to place it
over her eyes. "He's modeled what they might be able to do with the
rain forests on Earth. He thinks they can be restored to at least their
2200 levels of coverage in five years. Isn't that amazing?"
Giyadas cocked her head back and forth rapidly,
trilling with excitement. "It's green," she said. "So much green. And
people!"
"Yeah, Shapakti likes his jungle," she said. "Gorillas.
He knows that makes me feel odd."
"Why?" Nevyan had never thought of Shan as looking
back. Now Earth had become something new and challenging for her. And
if Shapakti was right, then she had the option of going home, and that
was alarming.
"Long story. I saw a gorilla once and they'd taught it
to use sign language. I didn't know what it was saying, but later on I
found out, and it was asking me to help it get out of its cage." Shan
raked her fingers through her hair: it hung down her back again, like a
male's. Her c'naatat was reconstructing
her as fast as Shapakti was fashioning new rain forests. "There's never
a day goes by that I don't think about how it must have felt to see me
walk away, so now I don't pass gorillas on the other side of the road,
or bezeri, or cockroaches, or anything else that deserves the same
respect as us."
Nevyan understood the sentiment if not the specifics.
Shan was back in a world that had given her great torment and that she
seemed to feel she could put right if she had the chance. The Eqbas had
handed her a world of chances.
"You get on well with Shapakti."
"He's a decent bloke. We talk a lot about ecology, but
that's all, okay? They're calling it the Earth Adjustment Mission. I
love euphemism. I could watch it all day."
"That's still in the future. You know it will take
their fleet five years to reach us."
Shan inhaled and her pupils widened into those black
voids that showed stress in humans. "Hey, what is it?"
"You plan to leave," said Nevyan.
"No, I never said that at all."
"Eqbas has found ways and reasons for you to return to
your home. And you will leave."
Shan looked towards the door leading back into the
house as if she had heard something. She jerked her head back to look
at Nevyan and she was visibly angry, wafting jask,
but she lowered her voice. "I don't want to hear another word about it.
I know Aras thinks I'm going to leave him as well and this sort of
discussion doesn't help calm things down."
Nevyan knew she was outscented but that didn't stop her
asking. "Do you want to return?"
"Don't ask me."
"Does Ade?"
"Ask him." Shan took the
visor off Giyadas and the isanket made a
disappointed lrrrr. "I'm not done here
yet."
Nevyan's world was falling apart and she suspected that
Aras's was collapsing in the same way. It was obvious: Shan wanted to
go home. If I were marooned on Earth, I would
want to return to Wess'ej. It was natural. But Shan was her
friend, and she needed her counsel and her jask,
and Eqbas was taking her away from Wess'ej as surely as it was changing
the heart and soul of the planet. She couldn't help but resent it all.
"I won't discuss it, as you ask," said Nevyan. "But I
need your help in more immediate matters. I want to ask Esganikan to
move the settlement to Bezer'ej. I'm uncomfortable with their presence
here. The whole city is. There's too much change, too fast."
Shan stood with fists on hips and nodded. "Okay. But we
do this together, right? Because if I go down there and start a ruck
with her then I'll end up driving the bus back to Earth, and that's one
decision I don't want anyone making for me."
"Thank you."
"Where's Aras?"
"He's getting ready to take Lindsay and Rayat back to
the bezeri. I'll be bloody glad when that's over."
Nevyan held her hand out to Giyadas to take her home.
The isanket looked longingly at the visor.
"Can I see Earth?" she asked.
"One day, if you want to and Nevyan says you can," said
Shan, instantly uncomfortable. Her eye movement gave her away. "It's a
long time to be away from home, though."
"Do you like Ade more than Aras?"
"That's a very personal question."
"Ade's nice. Aras is nice."
"They're both nice."
"Aras can't go to Earth, can he?"
"True." Shan made a very definite move for the door. "Go and see
Shapakti and he'll show you the macaws and get them to talk
to you. They do talk, you know. Like we do."
Shan's finality always had the impact of a slap across
the face. You didn't question it, not even if you were senior matriarch
of F'nar.
"I'll meet you at the Eqbas camp after dinner," she
said. "I need a bit of quality time with my jurej've."
She was, at least, referring to them in the plural.
It wasn't Shan's problem any longer.
When everyone else was running away from a bad
situation, she would be the one running towards it. It was what coppers
did. That was what all professionals trained to deal with trouble
did--police, firefighters, soldiers. She was never sure if she had
learned to do it as a young probationer or if she had worked out from
an early age that she was the little adult who had to make order out of
the threatening chaos of her family. But whenever it began, her
instinct was now to go and confront problems and sort them before they
sorted her.
She lay on the bed, arms folded under her head, and
waited for Aras and Ade to come back from the Exchange of Surplus
Things. Ade was convinced he could make a barbecue. He was trying in
his solid, dependable, reassuringly ordinary way to get life back to
normal, to settle Aras down.
It's not even a decision. You
don't run.
The isenj and the wess'har had been enemies for
centuries, and the Eqbas had been imposing their sense of order on the
galaxy for far longer. Humans had just stepped into the noisy bar and
found the fight already in progress.
Walk around the block.
Her first sergeant, the only man who'd ever seen her
really cry, said fights burned themselves out if you let them run on a
little. If you piled in you could make them a lot worse. If you
couldn't suppress the fight with numbers, then sometimes sending in a
lone woman officer would do the trick and calm things down, because
blokes still had that primeval reluctance to hit a woman.
Not all of them, though.
Walk around the block again. Let
the fight sort itself out.
She heard the door open and sprang to her feet, not
caring if she looked anxious or even smelled it when she came out of
the bedroom. Aras had a bag of vegetables and Ade was carrying some
metal grids and a strange assortment of cannibalized pipes.
"Okay, we're going to have a barbie on the terrace,
complete with Eddie's shitty awful beer and a game or two of cards,"
said Ade. "Proper fun."
"I shall find this interesting," said Aras.
He wore a permanent scent of acid now. Shan made a
point of wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her head on his
chest. You're still mine. Don't worry. But
it didn't prompt his usual urrring and his
embrace was halfhearted.
There was the occasional metallic crash and swearing
from the terrace as the barbecue resisted Ade's attempts to build it.
Shan listened, expecting Aras to offer him a hand, but he ignored the
noise and seemed simply to tolerate her touch.
"I could still go with you," she said.
"I think it's my proper role to deliver the prisoners."
"This is a bit more protracted." She slipped her hands
inside his tunic and touched cool, suede-skinned muscle, hoping for
some response. "Once this is over and done with, we'll concentrate on
ourselves. You, me, Ade." The word Ade
just slipped out. But it still didn't feel right, as much as she wanted
it to. "I'm not on duty any more and neither are you after today. We
don't run the universe. It's some other bastard's shift."
"One day you'll hate me for keeping you here."
"Don't be bloody daft."
"You will. Your loyalty is your greatest weakness."
"And there was I thinking it was my sloppy emotional
personality."
"You think you're ruthless, but you care about some
things very much."
"Whatever you say, sweetheart." Don't
do this. Don't. "Are you sure you don't want a hand with Lin?
Rayat might cut up rough."
"I can manage. I have an Eqbas with me."
"Okay."
"I shall get it over with,
as you say." He looked at her swiss on the table. "May I take that?"
"Of course." She'd made him take it when he parted from
her on Bezer'ej, too. It was just a silly token. She wouldn't need it
anyway. "It's only waterproof down to two hundred meters."
"I shall take care of it."
"Okay, Ade might even have finished the bloody barbecue
by the time you get back." She hugged him. And now she would have to
say what she had never been able to tell him. "I know I never say it,
but you do know I love you, don't you?"
"Yes. I know. And I love you. And there is nothing
either of us can do about that even if we wanted to."
It was an odd thing to say, but wess'har were full of
strange comments and Aras had lost none of his wess'har idiosyncrasies.
He was feeling insecure. She had to sit tight and let him calm down.
She went out to the terrace to offer Ade a hand with
the barbecue, but he'd managed to get it standing on four legs.
"All we need now is fire," she said.
"I bet you say that to all the cavemen," said Ade, but
there was something very like anguish in his eyes, and he smelled of
acid. Aras's fears were clearly getting to him.
In its way the barbecue was a perfect image of their
situation, a rickety approximation of Earth trying to re-create the
familiar but failing. Ade succeeded in grilling evem
and although the beer couldn't get them drunk it was an echo of what
had been. But there was no raucous laughter or chatting, just Ade
glancing occasionally at Aras and trying to crack a joke, and Aras not
responding. Shan wondered if they ever argued in her absence.
She hadn't picked up anything from Aras's memories to
tell her if they had or not. She wondered what selection process c'naatat
went through in deciding which
recollections were sufficiently significant to bring to the front of
the file. She suspected it was only the big stuff, the hard-in-the-face
stuff, the images that plagued you like flash frames during the day and
were the last thing you saw and tried not to see before you fell asleep
at night.
But they'd work it out. Ade and Aras were both
sensible, get-on-with-it sort of blokes. They were just like her.
She sat down on the wall and put on the visor that
Shapakti had given her. She had seen enough of the city of pearl for
the day. She wanted to rest her eyes on green forests, on Earth.
It was home. Whatever she did, it would never stop
being home.
TO:
Esganikan Gai and Nevyan Tan Mestin
FROM:
Minister Par Shomen Eit, Northern Assembly
The death of our
respected colleague Par Paral Ual has been the cause of much strife and
debate in Ebj and the rest of Umeh. We now recognize that we are in
increasing need of outside assistance if we are to survive as a people
in the long-term. If you now wish to begin talks with us about
environmental recovery, we will guarantee your safety. If you can put
aside your policy of occupation, then we can make efforts to change our
cultural attitudes to population control. If we can achieve this, then
Minister Ual's vision and sacrifice will be vindicated.
Shapakti wasn't happy about the change of
plans, and it showed. Ade was new to this scent-signaling business, but
it was now as loud and clear as a shout.
"I do not have orders to
take you to Mar'an'cas," said Shapakti, standing at the main hatch of
his vessel like a bouncer blocking a nightclub door. "Or Bezer'ej. Just
Aras Sar Iussan and the prisoners."
"Think of me as the escort," said Ade.
"We are competent to do this alone."
"She was my commanding officer."
"That's irrelevant."
"Look, mate, I'm coming whether you like it or not."
Ade wasn't sure if Shapakti was still afraid of him. He thought the
rifle might have given him a clue. "I'm making sure Aras comes back
okay."
"He can't be harmed."
"Neither can I. So humor me."
Shapakti made a little sideways jiggling movement of
his head. Shan said that wess'har did that when they were annoyed.
"Very well. But you're lying."
I haven't exactly lied.
It had taken Ade a while to understand that wess'har couldn't actually
tell if humans were lying or not, only that they were upset or angry or
afraid or any one of a dozen states of mind that changed your body
chemistry. They were like old-fashioned polygraphs. They told each
other exactly what they thought, but when it came to humans they simply
used their scent skills and other senses to spot the emotion and then
worked out the detail from context. They were getting very good at it,
and he now had enough wess'har in him for his scent signals to be an
open book to Shapakti.
"I have my concerns," said Ade. "I want to see Aras
back safely."
And that wasn't a lie, either. It had been almost
impossible to walk away from Shan as if he was simply going for his
usual daily run, without a proper goodbye. Everything had been left
unsaid again: it was as if he had lost her a second time, except that
he knew she was safe and well. But he was quite literally the spare
prick at a wedding here. And he owed the bezeri some substantial act by
way of apology.
Shan would understand. She'd done exactly the same,
although in a more spectacular way. The right thing was frequently the
one that hurt most.
Aras arrived at Shapakti's ship and stared at Ade as if
that would be enough to send him packing. "Go home," he said, and
tapped the tilgir in his belt. "I need no
assistance. I can deal with this."
"I know," said Ade, thinking of the time they had
hunted down an isenj patrol on Bezer'ej. Wess'har had no Hague
Convention and they didn't take prisoners. "But I'm coming anyway."
Aras paused for five long seconds. Maybe he resented
being offered help; maybe he had plans for Lindsay or Rayat that he
thought Ade might resist. No, Ade was fine with whatever he wanted to
do. They'd asked for it.
And so had he.
"No interfering," said Aras. "And you'll return to Shan
and do as I asked."
It was an awkward, silent flight to Pajat. It would be
an even more challenging journey to Bezer'ej. Ade hoped Shan would
understand one day.
Eddie packed his grip. Giyadas watched him for
a while, subdued, playing with his editing screen and his handheld. He
hoped she hadn't been annoying the UN staff on the ITX again. He
couldn't imagine being annoyed if an alien called him for a chat; it
would always be a wondrous thing for him as long as he lived. He had
passed from amazement through familiarity and into a state of wonder
again.
"You're going home," she said.
"No, I'm going to visit Jejeno with the Eqbas, if
that's not an oxymoron." He'd explain that word to her later, if she
needed it. She probably didn't. "I thought about it, and then I knew I
had to stay here."
"You like us best."
"Yeah, I like you a lot. But that's not the whole
reason. I've got to stop going home at the end of the day and
pretending nothing is my fault."
"You confuse me."
Eddie closed the grip and tested it for weight. At
least Umeh Station had real toilets with seats. He loved the wess'har
but he hated their plumbing. "It's hard to explain, doll, but in my job
you say things and write things that change what happens, but when
those events turn nasty you never have to face the consequences. We go
home, we go down the pub, we start a new story the next day, and the
people we said those things about have to clear up the mess. So for
once I'm making sure that I face the consequences by not going home.
I've got as much to lose as you have now."
"And the Jejeno discussions will be a good story
anyway."
"I know what you are. You're my bloody conscience."
"Will you teach me to do what you do?"
"What I do isn't worth doing."
"I want to do what you do."
"When I start doing it right, maybe."
Giyadas unfurled the editing screen. "Look what I did,"
she said.
Eddie smiled indulgently and held out his hand for the
screen. She was a sweet, clever, funny little creature and he adored
her. She had probably tried to edit some shots together, so he prepared
himself to praise her lavishly for being a smart girl.
The smile evaporated on his face as he flattened the
screen on his lap. He was looking at the locked-off camera shot of the
BBChan foreign news desk, and it wasn't a freeze-frame. It was live.
"Giyadas, what have you done?" He turned over the
screen: the handheld interface was active. When he flipped it back
over, Mick was scrambling into his chair and looking pissed off.
"Eddie, for Chrissakes where have you been?
Come on. Can't wait all day."
Giyadas preened. "I told the United Nations gethes
that I was the next matriarch of F'nar
and that I would tell Nevyan how helpful the UN had been if she would
connect me to the BBChan."
"Eddie…" said Mick.
"Wait one."
"Please, teach me to do what you do," said Giyadas.
"Doll, you don't need to learn a thing." Tears pricked
his eyes. "You're a natural."
"I like this reporting."
"So do I, doll," said Eddie, renewed. "So do I."
FROM:
Esganikan Gai, Wess'ej Mission
TO:
Curas Ti, Matriarch, Surang
At the request of
Nevyan Tan Mestin and Shan Frankland, we are relocating our operations
to Bezer'ej. Our presence is inconsistent with the life-style that
Wess'ej has chosen. Out of respect for our kinship, and in the
knowledge that they need no guidance in maintaining ecological balance,
we have agreed to this request to withdraw. We will locate the new
temporary settlement on the site of the previous wess'har base on
Bezer'ej.
Lindsay Neville watched Aras walk down the
path between the rows of tents. Shan wasn't with him, but Ade was.
Aras had that slightly swaying, almost feminine stride
that she had noted in all the wess'har males she'd seen. Despite his
height and solid build, there was nothing brutish about him and she
felt no instinctive sense of panic, even though she knew that he was
coming to take her to the bezeri for execution.
"I thought Shan might come," said Lindsay.
"This is my task," said Aras. "The bezeri are still my
responsibility."
Ade stood beside him in silence, expression carefully
neutral. A stranger would never have guessed that he had ever been
under Lindsay's command. Aras had a pack over his shoulder and that big
agricultural knife, the tilgir, in his
belt.
"Where can I find Dr. Rayat? There's no point trying to
evade the inevitable."
"He's working on the crops."
Aras cocked his head and walked on with Ade through
Mar'an'cas camp, Lindsay following them. He stopped and turned.
"You are quite extraordinarily compliant creatures
sometimes," he said. "I genuinely thought I would have to subdue you."
"Like you said, there's nowhere to escape."
Aras said nothing and carried on through the camp until
they came to the fields. Rayat was spreading human manure from the
latrines. Lindsay was never sure if he took on the task to show how
tough he could be, or if he was just doing a job that needed doing. She
had never really reached the inner core of the man and she suspected
she never would. Like Shan, he had a talent for making her feel
inadequate.
He stopped and leaned on his shovel. "So this is it,
eh?"
Aras beckoned. "Yes. Please don't try to bargain with
me, because I am not open to negotiation."
Rayat glanced at Ade and his rifle, and then shrugged
and drove his shovel into the soil. "Okay. No point putting on my
Sunday best for this anyway."
The colonists didn't stop to see them go. They went
about their business: they weren't the kind of people to turn into a
mob watching the tumbrills passing. Lindsay caught the eye of someone
she had known well, Sabine Mesevy, the botanist from Thetis who
had joined the colony. And when she
got to the shore, Deborah Garrod was waiting alone by the glass raft
that had somehow attached itself to the pebbles like a perfect jetty
reaching out into the shallows.
Eddie hadn't made contact since Umeh Station. Lindsay
had been so sure that he would. She was hurt: she wanted a goodbye,
even a forced one.
Deborah acknowledged Aras with a nod, then put her arms
around Lindsay and hugged her.
"It'll be okay," she said. "It passes."
She didn't hug Rayat, but then that wasn't surprising.
Lindsay had never been so scared in her life: from her
stomach to the core of her thigh muscles she felt cold and a sensation
of pressure squeezed against the roof of her mouth. There was something
in the brain that assessed threat far more accurately than the
conscious mind, and this time her brain said this
is really it, sweetheart. All the other times she had been
scared for her life--and there had been a few of those--it hadn't felt
like this, not at all. This was numbing, cold and completely disabling.
But if Shan could go with dignity, and Rayat too, then so would she.
She needed to pick her moment to ask Aras for the favor
that she suspected he would never grant.
She stepped onto the glass deck and wished she had been
able to examine this engineering miracle when she didn't have dying to
worry about.
The part-formed matrix of the Eqbas city stood
frozen in time.
It was neither growing nor deconstructing itself.
Nevyan walked ahead of Shan and Esganikan and stopped a few meters
short of it. It still stood twice her height, a pearl-covered mass of
swirls and billows that reminded her of the tree-sized fungi on
Bezer'ej. The air around it was warm and pleasant: tem
flies, caught out of season behind the biobarrier, went about their
business of laying down more nacre on the smooth surfaces.
"I thought you were going to remove this," said Shan.
Esganikan tilted her head this way and that. "There is
no core within this shell. Our materials have been deconstructed and
returned to the soil. This is purely the tem
deposits, and we will retrieve the remaining flies and release them
further south where the climate suits them. And then we can remove the
biobarrier."
Nevyan turned to watch Shan and the Eqbas commander,
feeling excluded from the debate. She could always tell--as could any
wess'har--when two matriarchs particularly liked each other, and for
all
the jask that had been emitted, Shan and
Esganikan did appear to be becoming comfortable together. Nevyan
imagined it was as much the shared experience of unnatural isolation as
it was the kinship of dominance. A return to Earth with a powerful new
ally seemed a prospect guaranteed to test Shan's resolve to stay.
"Okay, let's get these little buggers packed," said
Shan.
One of Shapakti's team placed a small square container
inside the biobarrier and within moments the tem
flies began struggling against an invisible force that was sucking them
into it. Then the biobarrier dissolved with a breath of warm air that
escaped into the winter chill of the plain, and only the thin shell of
pearl remained.
"Now, isn't that pretty?" Shan stepped forward and put
her hand out carefully, brushing her fingertips against the rippled
iridescence. Nevyan could see it was the lightest of touches, but the
shell cracked, and Shan stepped back with a small sound of surprise and
disappointment.
The pearl bubble began breaking up.
Shards shimmered to the ground from the uppermost level
and large cracks appeared at the bottom. The collapse picked up pace
and the three matriarchs stood back and watched as the structure
reduced itself to a heap of fragments.
Esganikan didn't react at all. Shan seemed upset.
"I hate physical metaphor," she said.
"It's just tem droppings,"
said Nevyan. "There is no such thing as prophecy."
Esganikan left without a word. She and her people were
free to visit Wess'ej any time, but Nevyan had the impression that they
would now keep at arm's length, to use
Eddie's grossly inaccurate phrase. The Eqbas matriarch was about twenty
meters away when she paused and looked back at them.
"Shan Chail, I have no
doubt that we will talk again, next time on Bezer'ej," she called.
"I'd like to do that," Shan called back, and Nevyan
wasn't sure if it was a statement of intent or a display of human
diplomacy.
Nevyan kept her thoughts about the nature of prophecy
to herself. It was a silly gethes thing,
this superstition business. The pearl shell had been an unstable
structure made of tem excrement, a thing
doomed to temporary existence from the start.
No, she would not be swayed by it. She hoped Shan could
ignore it too.
Aras had grown used to bezeri vessels over the
centuries but he decided he preferred the niluy-ghur.
However many times he submerged in the water-filled bezeri pod ships
and felt the sea flood his mouth and lungs, he had never grown used to
it.
It couldn't kill him. He had first found that he
couldn't drown when he was a prisoner of the isenj.
"Do you know what they're going to do to us?" asked
Rayat. He was sitting on the transparent deck, hands flat out behind
him almost as if he was trying to look relaxed, but it wasn't working,
not if you could smell a gethes' fear. Ade
was kneeling down on one knee next to Rayat, rifle across one thigh,
and Lindsay Neville stood with one hand on the column that housed the
steering mechanisms. She, at least, was looking down into the water
with some interest. She had been a naval officer. Perhaps she didn't
fear the sea as much as a land-based civilian.
"What would you do to someone who had caused the death
of most of your race?" asked Aras.
It wasn't a rhetorical question, although he knew how
to frame those. He wanted to know. He had little time left to find out
what humans might do in certain circumstances.
"There's only so much you can do to someone before they
die," said Rayat, and sounded as if he knew that for all the worst
possible reasons.
Aras sat on the edge of the deck and lowered the signal
lamp over the sea to summon the bezeri. It was a dull day and he would
be able to see their bioluminescence easily when they rose nearer to
the surface.
If only he had been able to tell Shan what he intended
to do; but he was adept at dishonesty now. She would have tried to stop
him. She had been sent here on the basis of Perault's lie to begin
with, and then he had made her exile permanent with another lie, by not
telling her immediately what he had done to save her life. When he
looked back, it seemed he had lied to her a great deal, just like
everyone else had.
He distracted himself with Rayat's question. "It will
be relatively rapid. You'll drown before you suffer. Bezeri have
cutting mouth parts but they have no weapons, and they're not as
creatively cruel as your own kind." He paused. "You're dead already,
though. The human-specific pathogen entered your lungs as soon as you
landed."
"You could have left us on the shore, then," said Rayat.
"This will be much quicker. It's also what the bezeri
want."
"So who's going to help them now?" asked Lindsay.
"I am," said Aras.
"No, I mean who will be based here now that your people
have withdrawn."
"Me. I'm going below to help them begin the rebuilding.
I owe it to them."
Shan would be furious, devastated, but she would get
over it. Ade would help her.
"What about Shan? I thought--"
"You thought wrong."
Lindsay seemed shocked into silence. Even Rayat smelled
startled. Aras concentrated on not looking at Ade.
"What if I did it?" said Lindsay at last. "What if I
went in your place?"
Rayat and Ade both reacted at once. "The fuck you are,"
said Ade suddenly. "If anyone's going down there, it's me. Is this some
stunt to get the parasite? Did this bastard put you up to it?" He
shoved Rayat in the chest. "Did he?"
Rayat still appeared genuinely surprised. He certainly
smelled stressed, then scared. "I never--"
"I thought of it myself," said Lindsay. "I'll do it. If
you infect me, then I'll serve them--if they'll let me."
Ade stood up and took his rifle off his webbing. "Right. So I just
stroll away from all this? Not me, mate." His face
was suddenly pale and he smelled as alarmed as Rayat. "Shan said all
she had to do was breathe in the water and stop panicking. I reckon I
can manage that."
"You have no idea what you're taking on."
"I never do. But I do it, anyway. I front up and earn
it. I don't know any other way."
Aras took it as an impulsive gesture by a fundamentally
good man confronted with an unpleasant reality. But now he realized why
Ade had insisted on coming. He had arrived at the same conclusion as
Aras. He had looked at the messy, painful reality of guilt and the
choices that were now open again and had made the same decision as he
had.
Aras pushed him gently away. "I want you and Shan to
regain the lives you had when you first landed on Bezer'ej."
"That's not going to happen." Ade stepped closer again,
face-to-face with him now: the prisoners were forgotten for the moment.
"You're not just staying here--you're planning to live
under water. You thought about that, have you? So have I. It's
going to be fucking awful and you haven't done a thing to deserve that.
There's no way I'm leaving you down there, and there's no way you're
abandoning Shan."
Ade started taking off his jacket, the one that changed
color according to his environment. As it fell on the glass deck it
made an attempt to become gray-blue and mimic the ocean beneath.
Lindsay, a tired-looking remnant of a woman in a shabby naval uniform,
grabbed his shirt-sleeve. "What the hell are you two thinking of?"
"They asked for me," said
Aras.
"Yeah, and they're going to get me instead," said Ade. "I'm a
complication Shan doesn't need. And I want to look the bezeri in
the eye and apologize."
Lindsay wouldn't let go of Ade's shirt. "No! Just stop this!
You can't go down there. She'll come
after you, you know that. Go home."
Lindsay let go of Ade and went over to Rayat,
remarkably steady on her feet for a human walking on a glass floor.
"It's me and this bastard. My command, his idea. So we pay. Okay?"
Aras thought briefly of seizing both of them and taking
them down into the water, leaving Ade behind: he was still bigger and
faster than the marine, although he could put up a credible fight. But
he knew Ade would pursue him. And one of them would still have to
decide to return to Shan.
"I was just an accident," said Ade. "Let me put
something right."
Aras found it was painfully tempting. Life would be
impossibly hard without his isan. He had
lost her once, twice, and now he was losing her for the third and final
time. Human culture was replete with trinity. But if she had Ade
Bennett, she would be cared for and respected, and--he hoped--she would
find some peace with him.
Rayat was licking his lips nervously and blinking. "Lin, we're dead
either way. You don't care what happens to Shan
Frankland. You don't even like her."
"This isn't about her. It's about me."
She put her hand out to Ade. Aras was getting agitated; if you took a
terrible step, you needed to take it fast. Thinking was too painful.
"Ask them, Aras. Ask them if they'll accept me."
"No, the bezeri need me. And Shan needs to have a
decision taken for her."
"You selfish bastard," said Lindsay.
Aras couldn't see what was selfish about it. It was no
more selfish than stepping out into space rather than hand over c'naatat.
Lindsay spoke with the venom and pain
of the human bereaved, who buried their anger at the dead for leaving
them alone, and it always lurked hidden in their grief.
It seemed a desperate trick to avoid death. Aras stared
at Lindsay, unable to equate this gesture with the woman who had
brought bombs to Bezer'ej and thought it was reasonable. "You think
being c'naatat is enjoyable? Desirable? Is
this your bid to acquire it?"
"Nobody's ever coming for us. The Eqbas are going to
see to that."
"You're not capable of this."
"Try me. Okay, the bezeri want justice. They can only
kill me once. If I live down there, I can serve them, and whatever you
think of me, I really, really need to be forgiven in some small part."
Lindsay grabbed Aras's wrist. No gethes--and
no wess'har in recent memory--had touched his skin except Shan. He
jerked back. "Go on, infect me," she said. "No tricks. Let me go down
there and help them. Please, Aras. Then go back to Shan."
Rayat's scent was pure acid. Aras was about to seize
both of them and plunge over the side of the raft, but something hit
him hard in the head, once, twice, sending him to the deck and filling
his vision with exploding light. He pushed himself up on one hand but
the next agonizing blow was so hard he heard bone crack and saw a spray
of his own blood spatter the deck in front of him.
A weight crashed onto his back, pinning him. His right
arm was forced up his back. His shattered skull could recover in a
matter of minutes, but he didn't have that time.
"Sorry, mate," said Ade, panting with effort. "Come on,
you lazy bastards, give me a fucking hand. Rayat, get his legs."
Lindsay and Rayat were pinning him down now, sobbing
with the effort. Ade forced his left arm higher, and as much as Aras
struggled he couldn't get his strength back before Ade's plastic
restraints--insubstantial, harmless-looking but horribly effective--cut
deep into his wrists. He managed to kick out, but three bodies were
more than he could cope with. The restraints snapped tight around his
ankles.
Then the weight lifted off him. He was bound and
helpless.
"You'll be okay soon," said Ade. He knelt panting, head
tilted to look him in the eye as he lay on the deck. "But she'd kill me
if I went back without you."
Aras knew that. He'd been working on forgetting it. "You can't do
this."
"Watch me. Okay, let's have the signal lamp." Ade got
to his feet and Aras expected Rayat to seize the opportunity to escape,
even though the antihuman pathogen would kill him if the sea didn't
claim him first. He picked up the device. "Does this thing interpret
English?"
"It does," said Aras, recalling how Shan had used the
lamp to apologize to the bezeri at least twice. It was getting to be a
habit. "If the bezeri won't take her, then you must--"
"Here they come."
Aras looked down though the clear deck. There were
lights, red and cyan and yellow, and they were rising nearer the
surface. The last of the bezeri were coming. Ade knelt and projected
the colored light through the transparent deck. Patterns flared into
the water.
The human woman wants to help
you rebuild.
The bezeri paused in their ascent. Their reply came in
a curious flat approximation of human speech. Is
she the one responsible?
Yes, and the man.
How will they serve us if we
kill them? Or when they drown?
Ade paused. We can make sure they
don't drown. Like Aras. Like me.
"Won't we contaminate them?" said Rayat.
Aras had moved among the bezeri for 500 years and none
of them had acquired c'naatat. "Ade, I
forbid you to go with them."
The marine looked at him and put a finger to his lips.
He turned back to signaling. Will you take them
and me instead of Aras?
Rayat reeked of acid. But he wasn't fighting. He wasn't
trying to escape. Maybe c'naatat was
better than death for him, because he had no chance now of ever leaving
Bezer'ej.
How can we kill them if they
displease us?
Ade shrugged, although the lamp couldn't interpret a
motion. Call Aras. He'll finish the job.
"Ade, stay." Aras rolled a
little so he could face him. I know your past,
Ade Bennett: I know your World Before, and
I know what fears haunt you. "Shan will never forgive either of
us for this deceit. You abandoned your mother--and now you abandon Shan
after putting her through hell. So much for your courage."
It was a cruel human ploy, a spiteful lie. Ade embraced
danger every day to stop the voices, his own and his dead father's,
that told him he was a coward. Adding Shan to those voices was almost
too cruel. But Aras would have said anything then to stop Ade going
into the water. He expected him to hurl back the same accusation--Aras
was running, taking the coward's way out--but none came.
Ade's face fell for a telling moment.
"You bastard," he said.
Aras could hear that faint note in his voice, the one that said he was
struggling. "I'd never let that woman down again. Never."
A vivid display of red and amber lights swirled beneath
the raft, pulsing occasionally with green, getting brighter with each
beat. The bezeri were shouting, screaming.
Give them to us. Give them to us.
Ade knelt back on his heels. This
will take a few minutes. Then he laid the lamp aside and took
out his fighting knife.
Lindsay shut her eyes and held out her arm to Ade. He
sliced into her arm and then cut a flap from his own, exposing an area
large enough to keep the blood flowing sufficiently to drip onto
Lindsay's cut, just as Aras had done when he dripped his own blood into
Shan's open head-wound. It wasn't easy: c'naatat
stemmed blood flow fast.
"Hold your arm against mine, for goodness' sake," said
Lindsay.
"No, I don't want your memories," said Ade. "But you're
welcome to mine."
He sliced across his arm several times before he seemed
satisfied that enough blood had flowed.
Mohan Rayat smelled panicky but no longer terrified.
And his expression was relaxed, almost… content. Whatever Shan thought
of him, she would have conceded that he was as capable as she was of
facing the unthinkable with dignity.
Ade paused, staring into Lindsay's face for one minute,
then two, then three. He grabbed her arm and examined it, frowning.
"Not a scratch," he said. His tone was flat and
unemotional. He dunked his sleeve in the sea and wiped the blade clean
on it, then turned to Rayat. "Now let's give you someone to keep you
company on those dark nights, eh?"
"It's going to be one long night down there," said
Rayat. "You lose the light at a thousand feet." He pushed up his sleeve
to offer his arm. "Let's do it, then."
Aras could feel the warmth and slight itching as c'naatat
reconstructed his skull and scalp. The
pain was dimming. Ade busied himself cleaning Aras's blood from the
butt of his rifle.
"Two more minutes, I reckon," he said.
Aras rolled a little further to watch Lindsay's grim,
terrified face as she stared down into the water that was now filling
with pulsing red, amber and gold lights. The raft was illuminated from
beneath by angry bezeri, floating on liquid fire.
Rayat was gazing down through the deck into the glowing
water as well. The scent of anxiety was overwhelming.
But Aras could have sworn he actually smiled.
Sometimes people
need a few rehearsals to find out what they're really made of. Shan
didn't, of course: right from the start, she took Horatius's view that
there was no better way to die than facing fearful odds and holding
that damn bridge. But I had Lindsay labeled as a regular human being,
the sort who thinks the best way to die is in your sleep aged at least
four score years and ten. And then she surprised us all. Who would have
thought she'd choose an eternity under water to atone for the
destruction of the bezeri? You never really know anyone at all. And I
don't think Lindsay really knew what she would be capable of, either,
not even then.
Was I ever
tempted to try c'naatat?
You must be
joking.
Eddie Michallat's Constantine Diaries
Ade watched the skyline for the approach
of a small globule of bronze shiplet. Shapakti was late picking them up.
"You okay now?"
Aras was sitting on his heels, arms folded across his
chest. Ade thought it looked weird, but wess'har found that as
comfortable as sitting cross-legged.
"I'm no longer in pain," said Aras.
Ade knelt down beside him and braced himself to put
both hands on Aras's head to examine it. Aras didn't flinch. Wess'har
had few taboos about being touched. Ade parted the hair--barbed and
vaned like strings of soft feather--and found nothing to indicate that
he'd smashed the butt of his rifle hard enough into Aras's head to
fracture his skull and rip it open.
"I'm sorry, mate," he said. "Only way I could bring you
down for a while."
"I understand."
No, he didn't: Ade ached with misery. He had become his
father, resorting to violence in a moment. And, as Aras had pointed
out, he'd run and left Shan to it, just like he had left his mother.
He'd been so sure he was doing the decent thing. Now he saw what Aras
had seen: another act of cowardice.
"C'naatat or not, that must
have hurt."
"It did." Aras reached out and went to clasp Ade's arm,
but he jerked it back. He was still edgy. "I regret what I said to you."
"Maybe it needed saying."
"I only said it to stop you. It's untrue."
It wasn't. Aras was becoming so human that he'd even
learned diplomacy. But it was nice of him to try to lie out of
kindness. Wess'har weren't good liars at all. And
neither am I.
How could he ever sleep with Shan now? She'd pick up
his memories. She'd experience those awful minutes. She'd know.
It might not happen right away, but she'd
find out before long. She'd realize that he handed over c'naatat
to the two people she most despised,
and that he and Aras almost competed to be the first to run out on her.
"What about you?"
Aras looked round. "What?"
"Oursan. You'll sleep with
her and you'll transfer whatever it is that the cells transfer and
she'll have your memories. She'll find out what went on."
Aras waited several seconds before replying, as if it
had occurred to him for the first time too. But he must have thought
it. "Perhaps not. Genetic memory isn't telepathy. And we will deal with
that when it happens."
"Can you lie to her? Would
you?"
Aras waited several seconds again. "I don't know."
Ade settled down again and waited, looking down through
the niluy-ghur's transparent deck at
swaying weed in the shallows beneath. Shapakti's fragment of vessel
could pick up the raft from the surface and set it down again without
even getting the deck wet. The Eqbas would be one hell of an assault
force. Ade appreciated that kind of detail.
He wondered what Lindsay and Rayat were doing right
then, and all he could imagine was that it was taking place somewhere
cold, and dark, and terrifying, and lonely.
Dawn was coming to the roomful of jungle
underneath the city of F'nar. Shan sat cross-legged on the floor and
watched the artificial sunrise produced by the daylight cycle that
Shapakti's team had created. The macaws stretched their wings one at a
time, legs extended beneath them as elegantly as a dancer's, and
fluffed their plumage.
C'naatat had many good
points. The best she could think of right now was that it had erased
all physical signs that she had spent an hour sobbing her heart out in
the privacy of the jungle room.
"Do you want to go home that badly?" said Shapakti's
voice. It made her jump. She hadn't smelled him coming.
"Forget it," she said.
"I understand. I long for home too."
She rubbed the back of her hand across her nose, still
sniffing. "Not a word to Aras or Ade, okay?"
"Why?"
"I don't want them to know."
"The treatment will always be here for you."
"If it works. But not for
Aras, though. And I won't abandon him, and I know Ade won't either."
"Then you have no reason to weep."
It didn't feel that way. But Shapakti was right. Shan
patted his back, reassured for the time being by splendid wess'har
pragmatism. The Earth she thought of as home didn't exist now: it
probably never had, but it would exist one day and the Eqbas would see
to that. She had almost completed the mission that Eugenie Perault had
never intended her to fulfill. No, she had no reason to weep.
"Are those two buggers back?"
"Of course they are," said Shapakti. "They wouldn't let
me accompany them on the niluy-ghur, but I
brought them back as you ordered."
"Just checking," she said. Ordered.
Yes, she had been in sistent. "They can
both be bloody daft sometimes."
"You have a good family. Cherish them."
Poor bloody Shapakti, years from home, and missing his
brothers and his wife and their kids. Shan could offer him no comfort
and fumbled in her pocket. She drew out the container that she had
carried with her wherever she went, across years and star systems.
"I want to show you something," she said. She opened
the cap and tipped the contents into her palm. Small, pale, round
seeds--tomato seeds--settled on the background of bioluminescence that
flickered within her skin. "Tomatoes. I always planned to grow them
when I stopped being a copper. These are illegal, you know.
Unregistered hybrids."
"Life-forms cannot be illegal."
"I like the way you people think. I really do."
She tipped the seeds back into the container and
decided that she was going to spend today sowing tomatoes, just as
she'd always planned. Shapakti beckoned her to the doorway, slipping
behind her and herding her out into the passage. He had to start moving
the habitat. Shan was glad it wouldn't remain here to remind her of
Earth.
She walked out into the daylight, the real daylight of
Ceret, the yellow sun they once called Cavanagh's Star before any human
knew how many different names it really had. She wandered back up the
pearl-encrusted terraces, rattling the seeds in the little box and
greeting wess'har who she now knew as friends and neighbors. She paused
at the top of the steps on the highest level of the terraces and turned
to admire F'nar in the winter sun.
It was as every bit as beautiful as rain forest if you
knew how to look.
Then she walked on, wondering about the feasibility of
that lavender preserve. As she pushed against the door, the lights in
her hands reflected in the pearl surface and she took a deep breath,
determined not to look back at her own World Before. It was the first
breath she had drawn in an hour.
"Hey, you two," she called. "I'm home."
CITY OF PEARL
and
CROSSING THE LINE
"Stellar."
Jack McDevitt, author of Deepsix
"Satisfyingly complex… [Traviss] at times,
evokes the earlier moral fables of Le Guin… at other times the
revisionist critique of expanding human empires… and at times the union
of romance with SF that we see in the work of Catherine Asaro or Lois
McMaster Bujold… Traviss manages to keep these sometimes conflicting
modes in balance, mostly through her strong sense of character."
Locus
"A fascinating cast of characters involved in
a richly complex situation… Her people are convincingly real… Traviss
has created a vivid assortment of alien races, each with distinctive
characteristics and agendas."
James Alan Gardner, author of Expendable
"Science fiction with teeth… In Shan
Frankland, Karen Traviss has created a tough, interesting, believable
character."
Gregory Frost, author of Fitcher's
Brides
"A writer to watch… Traviss takes what could
have been a rote collection of characters (marines, cops, religious
extremists) and slowly adds depth, complexity, and color."
BookPage
My grateful thanks go to Charlie Allery,
Bryan Boult, Debbie Button, and Dr.Ian Tregillis, for critical reading;
to my editor, Diana Gill, and agent, Russ Galen, for keeping me in
line; to Andy Tucker, for theological insight; to Benjamin Buchholz,
for finding the perfect word; to Malcolm McGreevy and Cliff Allen, who
set me on the path that led here; and to Chris "TK" Evans, who made
that path a whole lot smoother.
KAREN TRAVISS is a
former defense
correspondent and TV and newspaper journalist. She's now a political
public relations manager and has also been a press officer for the
police, an advertising copywriter, and a journalism lecturer. She has
served in both the Royal Navy Auxiliary Service and the Territorial
Army. A graduate of the Clarion science fiction and fantasy workshop,
her work has appeared in Asimov's, Realms of
Fantasy, and On Spec. She lives in Wiltshire, England.
The World Before
THE WORLD BEFORE
KAREN TRAVISS
For the Brigade of
Gurkhas
Contents
Prologue
"What am I, then?" asked Sergeant
Bennett.Aras walked ahead…
ONE
Ade Bennett clung to his schedule
twenty-five light-years…
TWO
Lindsay Neville just stood back. She
should have intervened, but…
THREE
Mar'an'cas was a striking landmark but it
seemed the…
FOUR
"You haven't lost your touch for stirring
up shit," said…
FIVE
A halo of shimmering hot air formed around
the Eqbas…
SIX
Shan let out a long rattling breath that
trailed off…
SEVEN
Eddie sprinted along the terraces. His
lungs were screaming for…
EIGHT
She could see lights. She could see red
and green…
NINE
"That," said Rayat, "is exquisite."
Lindsay saw the wall of…
TEN
Esganikan's ship had become a city in its
own right. …
ELEVEN
Shan began slipping the 9mm pistol in the
back of…
TWELVE
Someone hit her. She couldn't tell who it
was but…
THIRTEEN
"Holy shit," said Eddie. He inhaled a
chunk of… dehydrated
FOURTEEN
Shan walked along the shoreline of
Ouzhari, suitless and bewildered.…
FIFTEEN
"He should have known," said Shan.
Esganikan walked with her,…
SIXTEEN
The vessel that had separated itself to
visit Bezer'ej appeared…
SEVENTEEN
The scent of jask hit Nevyan before she
entered the…
EIGHTEEN
Ade crouched down to look Serrimissani in
her hostile black…
NINETEEN
It was cold and the bezeri who nestled in
the…
TWENTY
Nevyan knew now that her gut feel, as Shan
called…
TWENTY ONE
"He'll be okay, kid," said Shan. Giyadas
had a…
TWENTY TWO
Rayat made Lindsay a hot mug of broth. She
considered…
TWENTY THREE
The snow was knee-deep. Wess'har didn't
like the cold… but
TWENTY FOUR
The atmosphere over lunch was tense. Shan
had always… been
TWENTY FIVE
"Oh," said Shan. "Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh." Two
macaws fluttered among the vines,…
TWENTY SIX
Shapakti wasn't happy about the change of
plans, and it…
TWENTY SEVEN
Lindsay Neville watched Aras walk down the
path between… the
TWENTY EIGHT
Ade watched the skyline for the approach
of a small…
Ouzhari, once known as
Christopher Island,
on Bezer'ej: 2376 in the calendar of the gethes.
"What am I, then?" asked Sergeant Bennett.
Aras walked ahead of the human, picking a path between
the decaying bodies on the shoreline. A conversation among the dead
felt unseemly, but Aras knew that Ade Bennett had seen many
battlefields and had learned to handle the horror. He wasn't
irreverent. He was simply trying to cope.
"If you're asking if your appearance will change as
mine has, I can't answer that."
"Am I still human?"
Aras turned and looked hard into the soldier's eyes for
a sign of greedy excitement. There was nothing, not even fear, although
that would have been reasonable. Ade--he insisted Aras use his
nickname--was what Shan Frankland had called "a good bloke," a solid
professional soldier known as a Royal Marine. There was no monarchy any
more, and he was twenty-five light-years from his own seas, but humans
clung to those ancient identities. They even gave their warships names.
Judging by his unwavering gaze, Ade was still waiting
for a fuller answer. Aras understood the mix of dread and desperate
curiosity all too well.
"Mostly human," said Aras. "But a little isenj, a
little bezeri, a little wess'har. A little of whatever host that c'naatat
passed through."
"And what will kill me, exactly?"
"For all practical purposes, almost nothing. How your c'naatat
achieves that and adapts you will
depend on what you experience and what it takes a fancy to. You may
simply find the changes…a little disconcerting."
Ade nodded as if he understood, and wandered away to
check something at the waterline. The sand had once been white. Now it
was blackened and vitrified in places by the blast of cobalt-salted
nuclear devices.
And every few meters there were more decaying bodies of
bezeri beached by the tide.
Without their bioluminescence, the corpses of the
bezeri were a colorless translucent gel. There were four or five in a
cluster at Aras's feet. It was hard to count because the mantles were
decomposing and the outlines merging, but it looked to Aras like a
family group--two five-meter males with their great tentacles coiled
back, a female distinguishable by her narrower shape, and a smaller,
possibly juvenile male.
"Whoa, over here," called Ade. He slung his rifle
across his shoulder and crouched down. Aras went to see what he had
found.
There was a faint flicker of green light in a small
shape on the waterline. It was another juvenile. And it was still alive.
Ade bent closer. "Is there anything we can do?"
Aras took out the signaling lamp that he had always
used to communicate with the bezeri in their language of colored lights.
"No," he said.
There was nothing much they could say, either. Sorry:
sorry I failed to protect you. Sorry I didn't
wipe out all the carrion eaters, all the gethes, when I first
had the chance.
He said what little he could and the lamp translated.
I'm sorry. I let you down.
The response was a small flicker of that same green
light, incoherent, barely enough to raise a faint breath of sound from
the lamp. It was just a cry. It was fading.
Aras squatted close to the dying juvenile and comforted
it as best he could in words of light.
I'm here, little one.
Ade's brow furrowed briefly. The creature's tentacles
looked as if they were already rotting. "Have you got Eddie's camera?"
"You can't make education or entertainment out of this."
"People back home need to know what we've done." Ade
held out his hand for the small device that the journalist Eddie
Michallat had given them. "I think this says it all."
He aimed the camera, still looking detached but
emitting a scent of agitation that Aras could detect even through the
powerful ammonia stench of rotting flesh around them.
Aras remembered a human scientist called Surendra
Parekh who he had executed for killing a bezeri infant, and wished
again that he had executed all the gethes
when he had the chance.
Except Shan Frankland.
The juvenile bezeri flickered again, this time an
unusually deep blue.
Can you see me? asked
Aras. Did any of you escape?
There was no response. Ade glanced at him and they
waited long minutes, but the bioluminescence had gone forever.
Ade stood up and panned the camera across the beach,
capturing more devastation. There were no lights in the water any more.
"So this is collateral damage," he said.
Aras checked himself again, examining his skin for
signs of lesions. He was unmarked. Apart from his all-consuming grief
and anger, he was fine. C'naatat could
handle gamma radiation. But the microscopic symbiont had existed in the
soil of Ouzhari, and it couldn't have withstood the temperatures of a
nuclear blast.
It was no threat to anyone here.
There was no need for the gethes to
destroy it.
There were two things Aras knew c'naatat
couldn't do. It couldn't save its host from fragmentation; that was the
way all the wess'har troops infected with c'naatat
had eventually ended their lives.
And it couldn't save a host exposed to the vacuum of
space.
Aras looked up at a hazy sky where Wess'ej appeared as
a crescent moon. She was out there somewhere, Shan Frankland, not
wholly human, and so determined to stop humankind taking her c'naatat
that she chose death instead. Ade
wouldn't discuss it any longer. But Aras knew that spacing yourself was
a terrible way to die.
"How long?"
Ade looked away from the camera. "What?"
"How long does it take a human to die in vacuum?"
"Stop it, Aras."
"How long?"
Ade paused. "About twelve seconds. At most."
Aras thought about it, counting. He closed his eyes.
Ade had witnessed it and he hadn't. Ade had--
"No, I can't stop seeing it," said Ade. His voice was
suddenly hoarse. "And I know bloody well that you blame me for it, so
let's just agree that I'm the bastard who let her die."
Aras stifled urges to punish Ade. He also pitied him.
His scent said brother: he had Shan's
genes now, just as Aras did. He couldn't--wouldn't--harm
him.
He would save his balancing vengeance for Commander
Lindsay Neville, who had detonated the bombs here even if she hadn't
known the full consequences of her actions. And he would spare some for
her accomplice, Mohan Rayat. Rayat was a spook,
as Ade called it. Neville was a fool. And Ade was a victim of
circumstances they had created.
"I suggest we get decontaminated and return to
Wess'ej," said Aras. "Eddie will be impatient for his pictures."
Aras was mired in his own bereavement as he walked
among the bodies. For all the foreign genes his c'naatat
had acquired over the years, he was still wess'har, but the human
components within him were screaming me, me, me.
In that brief moment, he would have sacrificed all Bezer'ej and even
Wess'ej itself to bring Shan back.
She was his isan. He could
hardly function without her.
But he would have to learn.
The Federal
European Union greatly regrets the loss of life on Bezer'ej and the
deaths of Superintendent Frankland and her ussissi aide. We condemn the
actions of Commander Neville. Let me restate our position: we did not
and would not sanction first-use of nuclear devices. As we have no
effective military structure left on Umeh, there is no direct
disciplinary action we can take against Commander Neville or the troops
under her command; but they are now dismissed the service, and in the
absence of FEU enforcement, they fall properly within the scope of your
own judicial system as the protectors of the bezeri. Our representative
Dr. Mohan Rayat will offer every cooperation.
BIRSEN ERTEGUN,
Foreign Minister, Federal European Union,
in a statement to the matriarchs of F'nar
F'nar, on Wess'ej, August
2376
Ade Bennett clung to his schedule
twenty-five light-years from home in an alien city that was coated
entirely in pearl.
He ran ten kilometers every morning at dawn and there
was no reason to stop doing it just because the sun was now a different
star and he was a prisoner of war. He pounded along the terraces of
F'nar and down its stepped slopes.
Wherever the sun warmed smooth stone, the tem
flies would congregate and deposit a thin
layer of nacre. The iridescence was insect shit: Shan had found that
funny, Aras said. She liked irony.
And she's dead. And it's all
your fucking fault. You let her die.
Ade wanted to erase the final picture of her standing
in the airlock, seconds from death. But it was the last scrap of her
that he could still grasp, the memory of a woman he had never expected
to love and to whom he had left everything unsaid. Something in him
wouldn't let it go. He had decided to confront it instead.
The native wess'har paused to stare at him as he made
his way down the terraces. Some acknowledged him with stiff nods of
their sea horse heads. He was a POW in a city where he was regarded as
a hero, but every day he was here served only to remind him that he was
alive and Shan wasn't, and that he'd failed the basic heroic
qualification of saving what you loved.
Sweat prickled its way down his back. He made his way
through the alleys that honeycombed the lowest level of the city at the
bottom of the encircling caldera. Beyond the city lay the irregular
mosaic of fields and allotments that blended into the natural
landscape, and beyond them were the plains that were arid in summer and
covered with quick-growing vegetation in the brief, wet winter. F'nar
had been built where it would have least impact rather than the most
convenient location. Wess'har didn't seem to have the same priorities
as humans.
Ade's route took him south of the caldera and up the
rock face of a volcanic plateau that looked down onto the fields and
the city itself. He liked climbing: it was one of the basic mountain
warfare skills he had learned as a Royal Marine, and he could lose
himself in absolute concentration. Free-soloing--climbing without a
partner or equipment--was what he did best. That was just as well.
There
was no other way to climb on Wess'ej.
The rock face was smooth enough in places to attract
the attention of tem flies and it was
embossed with the pearly shit they'd laid down in the summer. If he
half-closed his eyes, the reflected glare made it look like a
snow-streaked peak back on Earth. He felt above his head with his right
hand for a secure hold and locked his fingers into a horizontal crevice.
For a few moments he hung with his full weight on one
hand, face against the cool gold rock, looking up at another hold
thirty centimeters beyond his normal reach.
Combat boots were lousy for climbing. He jammed a
toecap into a pocket of rock and transferred his weight, lunging
upwards to grab hold of the outcrop above him. He knew every hold on
the ascent now. He could climb it blindfolded.
What he really needed now was a good, solid hex to jam
into the fissure above him to take a rope. He wondered if the wess'har
might be able to make him some kit for the harder climbs. But for now
he was reliant on his free-climbing skills alone, and he reached for
another hold. The crevice accepted his fingers. It felt secure.
And the moment he hung all his weight on that hand, he
knew that it wasn't.
The rock came away from the face and suddenly there was
no sense of pressure under his fingertips at all.
He flailed, grabbing instinctively. He felt his right
humerus snap as his arm clipped an overhang and he landed flat on his
back with an involuntary shout as the air was slammed out of his lungs.
He couldn't breathe. His head was filled with a single high note like a
tuning fork's. For a second he wondered if it was his own scream of
pain, but then he realized the noise was somehow inside his head,
probably triggered by a shattered spine.
He'd been told that happened. It was funny how you
could think rational things when you were dying.
Shit, shit, shit--
It occurred to him that he deserved to die anyway. Shan
was dead, so if he died too, then at least he'd never have to wake up
to that realization again. The pain filled his mouth. He had no idea
how long he lay there paralyzed and wondering when the sky would go
dark.
You can't die. Aras said so.
But he was dying, he was sure of it: and now he wanted it over with.
Instead of being filled with creeping cold, he felt he
was burning. Then the searing pain ebbed and he found himself
breathing, first reflex, shallow gasps while he tested his ribs, and
then deep breaths.
Eventually he eased himself up on his left arm. His
right arm was throbbing, but he could move it. It took him a few more
minutes to recover enough to stand up and understand what had happened
to him.
So this was c'naatat at
work. A fall that would have killed or crippled him was now a temporary
but painful--and terrifying--inconvenience. It didn't take a genius to
work out how valuable c'naatat was or how
open it would be to abuse. It was just a shock to experience it so
spectacularly.
"Shit," he said. "You couldn't give me a way out, could
you?" But that wasn't fair. Aras needed him now. Somehow, they had to
get each other through the bleak days ahead that were all Ade's fault.
There might even come a time when he could go for hours without
thinking of Shan and what he had done, but that wasn't now.
He stood staring at the backs of his hands for a few
minutes to see if anything else was changing, and when he was satisfied
that nothing was happening he looked up at the rock face to work out a
new route to ascend.
At the top he stood and scanned the landscape. The
secluded cairn he had built looked out over an idyllic vista; without a
grave--without even a body--he desperately needed a place where he
could
commemorate Shan. He needed somewhere to apologize and grieve. Maybe
he'd bring Aras up here one day, but not yet. Now was too soon. And he
preferred to cry on his own.
It wasn't as if they'd even had a relationship.
If Shan ever belonged to anyone she had belonged to
Aras. But she was the Boss, even if she was a police officer and so not
part of his chain of command, and for Ade she always would be. He ought
to have called her the Guv'nor as coppers
did. But she had never seemed to mind.
He knelt down and added a few pearl-coated stones to
the mound.
"There you go, Boss." The word hurt. He took his medals
out of his pocket and folded the brightly colored ribbons around them
before easing them into a gap between the chunks of rock and the fine
pearl pebbles. "All tidy. Sleep tight."
He paused for a few moments, entirely incapable of
prayer because he had seen too many things that no reasonable god would
allow, and turned to start his descent. His palm itched and he glanced
down at it. Right to receive, left to pay away;
that was what his mum used to say. Beads of green liquid were welling
up from his skin and he wiped his hand on the leg of his battledress,
but the fluid emerged again like one of those miracles that was
supposed to happen to the statues of saints.
It was no miracle and he felt as far from sainthood as
any man ever had. It was the bioscreen being removed a cell at a time. C'naatat
was purging him of all his implants and
the organic battlefield computer grown into his palm. But it hadn't
touched his tattoos, and Ade thought they were the sort of thing c'naatat
would have wanted to tidy up. Aras had
warned him that the parasite wasn't predictable.
"Sergeant?"
He thought he was alone. He wasn't. "Oh, Christ," he
said. His heart pounded.
Nevyan Tan Mestin was standing right behind him and he
should have heard her approach. He was a commando, for Chrissakes; she
shouldn't have been able to ambush him. The wess'har matriarch cocked
her head and looked past him at the cairn with four-lobed pupils
dilating and contracting visibly in bright yellow eyes. Sea horses.
Eddie's description was unnervingly
accurate.
"Why do you not walk up the slope to this summit?" she
asked. Wess'har voices were weird, tone and overtone like a chorus,
each word made of two simultaneous components. Will
I sound like that one day? "You choose a hard route."
"I like climbing, ma'am. I need to keep active."
"What are the stones for?"
"To remember. It's a memorial."
"To Shan Chail?"
"Yes." Wess'har didn't even bury their dead, let alone
erect monuments. They left them for the scavengers. "It helps."
"But you won't forget her."
"No, never. But I come here to think about her."
"And the pieces of metal?"
"They're--they're my medals." Ade was too embarrassed to
explain what medals were and how he had won his. "It's an old human
habit. We leave valuable things for the dead."
He'd said it aloud now, the word dead.
It had its own finality. He felt he'd betrayed Shan by letting it slip
out. Nevyan stood looking down at the cairn, thin multijointed fingers
meshed in front of her like an ornate basket, and her iridescent white
matriarch's robe was as bright as the shit-covered pebbles.
"I miss her too," she said at last. "May I come here to
think of her?"
No, thought Bennett. This is private. This is for me.
This is just for me to
get my head round this, if I ever can. It's for me and the Boss and
nobody else, maybe not even Aras.
"Of course you can, ma'am," he said, fighting
reluctance, and felt robbed.
But Nevyan had been Shan's friend, and this was her
planet and her city.
"We will recover her body, I promise you, and you shall
have your grave." She gestured towards F'nar. "Now walk with me. Let us
discuss what will happen to your comrades."
Ade obeyed, which was not unreasonable given that
Nevyan was now the leader of F'nar and he was technically her prisoner.
But it reminded him how easily he followed orders and how he had done
what Commander Neville had ordered. He had said yes,
ma'am when she asked him to land nuclear weapons on Bezer'ej and
he'd said yes, ma'am when she asked him to
capture Shan Frankland.
He should have said sod off,
ma'am. Maybe both Shan and the poor bloody bezeri would all be
alive now if he had. He had no idea how he was going to live with
himself in the very long future ahead of him or what it would take to
atone. He walked beside Nevyan, but whatever she was saying to him he
couldn't hear it. He could only see Shan through the shuttle hatch,
choosing a cold hard death rather than surrender c'naatat
to anyone. The image intruded more frequently every day.
If it mattered that much to the Boss to safeguard the
damn thing, then it would matter to him.
"You know that we don't take prisoners," said Nevyan. "What am I to
do with your comrades?"
Yes, he knew that. Wess'har killed, period. They were
strict vegans and respected all life, but once you were at war with
them it was to the death. "You mean Izzy and Chaz? The two marines
still with the colonists?"
"I mean all of them."
"The other three are still on Umeh."
"We shall be asking the isenj to return them, along
with Commander Neville and Dr. Rayat."
Ade managed to keep up with her stride. "Sorry?"
"Your government has abandoned you."
"I didn't think they'd be sending a limo to pick us up."
"I mean that they have dismissed you and turned you
over to us."
Ade wondered for a moment if Nevyan had misunderstood,
but her English was fluent to the point of being peppered with slang
that he recognized--painfully--as Shan's. "Ma'am, what exactly did they
say?"
She cocked her head, not slowing. "Dismissed
the service."
The fragile world that Ade had begun to think of
rebuilding had collapsed before him again. His gut churned. He knew
they'd face an enquiry but he hadn't expected to be kicked out and
dumped in the enemy camp. The FEU didn't know why he surrendered or
that he was far safer among wess'har than his own kind; as far as they
were concerned, they were shitting on him from a great height. Lindsay
Neville had asked for it, but not the detachment.
You're the bloody sergeant. You
should have stood up to her.
He could hear his own heartbeat pounding in his ears.
Nevyan stopped and stared at him, head tilted, pupils opening and
closing. Aras said wess'har could actually smell what state of mind you
were in by the scents you gave off. She looked like she could smell him
clearly enough.
"Sergeant--"
"I'm not a sergeant any more, am I?"
It hurt. Ade had been in the Corps since he was
sixteen. It was his refuge. It had given him self-respect and the
nearest thing he had to a family, and now it had been torn away from
him by some file-shuffler in Brussels who'd never been closer to war
than his news screen. He wondered what the hell he still had left,
stranded 150 trillion miles from Earth and never, ever going home again.
Sod it. He was whatever
the Corps had made him. He'd bloody well find something.
He peeled the sergeant's stripes off the sleeves of his
pullover. He'd leave them at the cairn tomorrow.
"It's Ade, ma'am," he said. "Just Ade."
Nevyan slowed her pace and they walked an unmarked path
that took them south of F'nar and led into the city like a processional
route into an arena. From most positions you couldn't even see F'nar
until you were right on top of it, and now Ade was looking straight
into its heart. The caldera was almost a complete ring, with homes and
terraces cut into the rock. With the icing of pearl laid by the tem
flies, it looked like a wedding cake turned
inside out.
He found himself thinking that it would be a good
location to defend but a hard one to escape.
"I won't harm your comrades," said Nevyan. "If they
want refuge here, we will accept them. My argument is with Neville and
Rayat."
"That's very generous of you, ma'am. Don't you hold us
all responsible?"
"Did you or your detachment activate the bombs?"
"No, but--"
"Then the act itself was not your responsibility."
If Ade needed another reminder that wess'har didn't
think like humans, this was one. He struggled with the concept.
"That's… generous."
"I think your government are a bunch
of tossers, yes?"
It was just what Shan would have said. Delivered in
that voice-upon-voice, it sounded utterly surreal.
"Yes, ma'am," said Ade. "Tossers."
Jejeno, Umeh: August 2376
in the calendar of the humans.
The city of Jejeno was not a smoking ruin when Minister
Par Paral Ual's vehicle made its way through the packed streets between
his office and the human habitat.
Ual had expected it to be. He had expected war. But it
had not yet come.
Where Umeh Station stood, there was no pall of smoke or
dying fire. It was still there, its translucent faceted dome glittering
in the forest of tall buildings east of his office. The wess'har hadn't
aimed their missiles at it in retaliation for the humans' nuclear
attack on Bezer'ej. Perhaps the destruction of Actaeon,
the Earth ship, had satisfied their need for balance.
He doubted it. It wasn't like them at all.
Ralassi--his ussissi aide--sat beside him, silent behind
his breather mask.
"We shall end up like Mjat," said Ual's driver. He
showed no impatience as isenj pedestrians parted ahead of the ground
car, moving according to strict unspoken traffic rules in the densely
packed city. The whole planet of Umeh was crammed with cities, and all
cities were like Jejeno. "They wiped us out on Asht."
"Bezer'ej," said Ual. The wess'har had renamed it. This is not
your world,
and never will be. This is the world of the bezeri. "The
wess'har call it Bezer'ej, and the humans Cavanagh's Star
Two."
All isenj remembered the fate of Mjat, their colony on
Asht. Mjat was now a synonym for holocaust. The event was five hundred
years ago as humans calculated, and it was not the only massive loss of
life in the wars with the wess'har: but it had a special place in the
isenj consciousness because it had resulted in the death of millions,
mostly civilians.
And the Destroyer of Mjat still lived, centuries after
he should have been dead. The driver was fascinated.
"So he's real, then, sir? Not a myth?"
"He is." It seemed impossible. "And living on Wess'ej."
"The humans caused the death of his female. Do they
know what he did to Mjat?"
"Yes."
"And are they afraid?"
"I'm not sure if they have the sense to be. And I'm not
sure that I fully understand the wess'har logic of culpability." Ual
knew what the ussissi told him, and what his genetic memory recalled,
and what the archives recorded. But he had never met a wess'har. "And
that ignorance is something I must remedy very soon."
The ground car pulled up at one of the airlocked
entrances to Umeh Station. "You mind yourself, sir," said the driver.
Ralassi trotted out in front of Ual. "Humans are said to be aggressive
when crowded."
Inside the dome, Umeh Station was in chaos. Ual
wandered unacknowledged into the humans' fragile bubble of a settlement
and decided that they might benefit from a lesson in how to create
order among large numbers.
The dome was strewn with the detritus of a project
still under construction. Nearly three hundred humans were now crammed
into a space built for two hundred, the numbers swelled by evacuated
crew from the unlucky Actaeon.
Ual was looking for one of Actaeon's
company in particular. He found Commander Lindsay Neville in the site
office, arguing with a civilian over arrangements to feed the dome's
population. Humans, it seemed, would not wait patiently for meals like
isenj. Neither the commander nor the civilian looked like healthy and
well-rested specimens of their kind.
Ual clicked impatiently and waited. He didn't have two
highly visible eyes, and humans needed something called eye contact
to get attention. Ual supposed he
looked like any of the many isenj workers to them--multilimbed,
spiny-coated and anonymously alien. Ralassi slipped between the humans,
all teeth and anger, and interrupted.
"Minister Ual is visiting you in
person," he snapped. "You will do him the courtesy of postponing
your argument."
Both humans fell silent. So this was the one that Eddie
called Lin.
"I note you did not go down with your ship, Commander
Neville," said Ual.
The civilian male picked up a paper from the desk and
walked out. Lindsay, standing stiffly as if used to deferring to
superiors, was wearing something they called a uniform.
Ual thought it odd that humans fought so much among themselves that
they needed markings to divide allies from enemies. Similarity should
have united them.
"Actaeon wasn't my ship,
sir," she said, seeming to miss the point. "We don't appear to have an
ITX comms link to Earth any longer. I really need to talk to Fleet.
Might you be able to help with that?"
The entangled photon link was the technology that held
the humans in the alliance: it was isenj technology, not theirs, and it
was not shared, merely lent. "These are nervous times, Commander," said
Ual. "I thought it might be safer for everyone if we restricted
communications between this base and your government. It is not secure,
as you call it, and I fear the wess'har
could overhear something that might provoke them further."
Neither of them had said the obvious. You
attacked a wess'har protectorate. Ual wanted
to see how she would broach the topic. She didn't know it yet, but her
masters had abandoned her and her soldiers to the mercy of Wess'ej;
he'd seen the Federal European Union's message, and it was time to tell
her.
"I didn't know the devices were salted with cobalt,"
she said. "I was duped. I truly regret that."
"A fine distinction that I fear will carry little
weight with the wess'har. Have you heard of Mjat, Commander?"
"Your colony on Bezer'ej. Well, your former colony."
"It was erased. Completely, and without trace. And that
was for accidentally polluting the bezeri's marine environment.
Wess'har are not a forgiving people, and Aras Sar Iussan is even less
forgiving than most."
"Okay, and I helped his precious Shan space herself. I
get the picture."
Ual doubted it. He doubted that Lindsay understood at
all: she would not have risked violating Bezer'ej if she had. It seemed
an appropriate time to break bad news.
"Your foreign minister sent a message condemning your
actions and used an interesting phrase--you and your troops are dismissed
the service." Ual searched for his
most colloquial English. "She has washed her hands of you and told the
wess'har that they may deal with you within their law."
Lindsay said nothing but she was blinking rapidly,
something Eddie Michallat did when an interview became strained.
"That's just great. Great."
Ual wasn't sure if she was upset or angry. "It's not fair on the
marines, though. They weren't party to this. The bastard you want is
Mohan Rayat."
"Ah, they did mention him. Apparently he is now the
FEU's chosen representative here."
Lindsay's mouth opened slightly as if she was gulping
in air. "He's their spook. An intelligence agent. A spy. You know what
that is?"
"I do now," said Ual.
He had never had to deal with spies before. Neither
wess'har nor ussissi had any concept of deliberate state secrecy; it
was alien to isenj as well. But they were now all learning fast. It
troubled Ual to discover just how much of the human brain was devoted
to deception. He wondered if his own mind would be altered by trying to
think as they did, and was grateful that he had already fathered
offspring and so would not pass on those memories to corrupt them.
"The wess'har will ask us to hand you over."
"And if you don't?"
"I have my own people's welfare to consider."
"I'll answer for my own actions," she said. "But only
if Rayat answers for his."
"I know you didn't act alone, but you're in no position
to make bargains."
"And I'm not carrying the can for this on my own.
What's happened to the rest of my marine detachment? Three are still
prisoners. I'd like them released."
"This isn't the time to make such a request of the
wess'har."
Lindsay Neville adjusted the gold braid tabs on the
shoulders of her uniform shirt. Then she unfastened them and slid them
off.
"Seeing as they've bypassed the court martial, I'll
dispense with these, then." She seemed more resigned than afraid of the
prospect of wess'har retribution. Perhaps she knew that they killed
fast and clean. "But if you can arrange a direct conversation between
me and FEU Command, I would consider that a great personal favor. If I
go, I won't go quietly."
Lindsay Neville walked out into the melee of soft,
larva-smooth humans. Ual didn't like hosting this unstable nest of
aliens in his city but he had to concentrate on the more immediate
threats. Of those, he was not sure which was the greater: the political
clamoring of his colleagues of the Northern Assembly, who wanted
answers on the human question, or the wrath of the wess'har.
"Ralassi, ask your comrades what they know," he said.
Ussissi were conduits of information. They worked for everyone and
served no one; they crewed both wess'har and isenj ships but they did
as they pleased and cherished their neutrality. "I need facts. Humans
aren't very good at supplying those."
Ralassi disappeared into the crowds outside the site
office, weaving between humans and isenj workers. Some ussissi had
returned after evacuating when retribution seemed imminent. They would
know what the wess'har intended. This was not what the humans called spying,
because the wess'har would neither
conceal their intentions nor broadcast them. They simply
acted--arrogant, aloof, alien--without notice or consultation.
Ual wandered around the dome, noting that there were
vines creeping across the supports that held the roof panels and a
fountain was playing in the central plaza. The base held the promise of
being pleasant accommodation when it was finished, with a cool, moist
atmosphere. He savored the rare treat of walking unrecognized as a
minister of state, eavesdropping on conversations among creatures that
had no idea he could understand them.
Perhaps that was what being a spook
was like. It seemed amusing.
He heard words like stranded
and never going home and we're not getting out of this.
He heard a few
words he didn't understand: fucked, sitting
ducks, shanghaied. They were the sort of words that Eddie
Michallat would have explained to him. He wondered if he might tempt
Eddie back to Umeh.
And still the humans ignored him. He was just another
alien to them, no longer a miracle of creation but an invisible part of
the backdrop to their own self-preoccupation. You
remind us of spiders. Eddie had always been brutally frank. Ual
found that if he made quick darting movements like the terrestrial
creature he could get humans to flinch instinctively and look at him.
That was amusing too.
It was a brief respite. The days and months ahead would
be anything but amusing.
Back in his vehicle, he waited for Ralassi. Ussissi
were another species the humans classified by similarity to creatures
from their own world: meerkats. Eddie said
it was their sharp faces and small teeth and the way they all sat up at
once when something grabbed their attention. So Ralassi was a meerkat,
and he was a spider,
and that was how humans coped with those who were different, by
classifying them as lower species.
Ralassi scrambled back into the ground car, his beaded
belts rattling. "I hear interesting reports," he said. "The wess'har
have sought help from the World Before, from Eqbas Vorhi. They're
coming to their aid--a most extraordinary thing."
Eqbas Vorhi. He had heard
the name, or an ancestor had. They changed worlds. "Should we fear
their intervention?" Ual asked.
"Oh yes," said Ralassi. "They are more numerous than
the wess'har of Wess'ej and have greater military resources. And they
are far less restrained. Wess'ej and Umeh may have shied away from
fighting on each other's homeworlds, but the Eqbas have a different
history."
"So it's true, then. They shape worlds to their wishes."
"Indeed. We know them. We
evolved with them."
The original wess'har homeworld--the ussissi's home
planet, too--had never intruded in isenj life. The wess'har in the Nir
system--what the humans called Cavanagh's Star, totally ignoring true
names again--had arrived thousands of years ago. They had cut off
contact with the rest of their people even though Eqbas was only five
light-years away by human reference, and that was all he knew.
If the wess'har here could keep isenj from Bezer'ej and
effectively confine them to Umeh and Tasir Var, what might the Eqbas
do? Ual and his fellow ministers thought an alliance with the humans
might change the balance of power.
Now they had certainly changed the future for the
isenj, but not in the way he had hoped.
"If the wess'har killed millions of my people when the
bezeri had asked for their aid, what will the Eqbas do now that the
humans have wiped them out?" Ual said, but it was a rhetorical
question. He could work out the sequence unaided.
Ralassi was right: Wess'ej had never threatened Umeh,
and Umeh had never attempted to attack Wess'ej. But Umeh had never been
host to an enemy base before, a complication that the whole city feared.
"We're on our own," said Ual. "The humans are
twenty-five years away. They have limited technology and our only
allies are the Federal European Union. The rest of their planet doesn't
care or actively opposes them. There will be no cavalry
coming to our aid."
"Cavalry?" Ralassi consulted his belt full of recording
devices. Interpreters liked new words. "What does that mean?"
Ual thought of database images of humans forcing other
creatures to carry them into battle, creatures dying from wounds and
starvation and exhaustion. "Something else the wess'har would not like
about humans."
Ual considered his options on the way back to his
office and said nothing more to Ralassi. The vehicle slowed and then
stopped. Crowds pressed on its sides as they tried to ease past it.
"What's the delay?"
Delay was relative in Jejeno. The driver listened
carefully to his comms link. "There is a disturbance ahead."
Ual and Ralassi squeezed out of the ground car and were
nearly crushed by the mass of isenj. Shrill panic had gripped them, and
panic was something to dread in a crowded city because it meant crush
injuries and death. Ual heard the word ship
repeated over and over.
An attack.
But there had been no alarm. There was no warning
system for invasion, but there was certainly one for civil emergencies
like street crushes. The fear that Umeh's immunity from attack had
evaporated had swept the city, and Ual expected to hear that alarm.
The crowd was now so tightly packed that all movement
had stopped. He could hear screams of pain. People were dying in the
melee. He shouldn't have stepped out of the car. Ralassi grabbed one of
his arms and tried to push him back inside to relative safety.
"Ship!" someone shouted.
Ual looked up and there was a vessel dropping through
the cloud, unfamiliar in shape, smooth and narrow.
The driver leaned out of the cab section, comlink
clutched to his chest, and tugged on Ual's arm. "They say it's just
ussissi. It's only the old human shuttle they salvaged. There's no
danger."
But it was too late for many to be comforted by that.
The fear of wess'har retaliation was so great that even an obsolete
transport vessel like this could send them into a terrified and deadly
scramble for safety.
"Inside, Minister," Ralassi insisted. "Let this pass."
Ual squeezed back into the car and settled on the broad
flat seat with relief. He was now pinned down in a street, unable to
drive or even walk away. It didn't bode well for the future. If the
wess'har ever attacked, the results would be catastrophic without their
needing to fire a single weapon. Cities were vulnerable by their very
nature. A planet that was simply one vast city was a disaster preparing
to unfold.
"Connect me to my communications," he said. "I might as
well use this time productively."
Ual had avoided conversations with the FEU foreign
minister for several days, although she had transmitted a number of
formal messages of apology and reconciliation. Now he knew what the
wess'har had in mind, he could have more than a token diplomatic
exchange. And he would insist on speaking to her without filtering or
interference from what Eddie called spin doctors.
Then he would call Eddie.
He had plans to speak to everyone. No, not
everyone. Dare I speak
to the matriarchs of F'nar?
"How do I contact the wess'har leaders?" he asked.
Ralassi's little teeth were just visible, and his eyes
narrowed into slits. It was a sign of disapproval. "The Assembly has
not authorized direct contact."
Perhaps it was a rash move. Ual had no idea what he
might say by way of conversation anyway: all conversations had been in
the form of warning statements and counter-warnings since the last
ancient war. "You're correct."
The crush outside showed no sign of abating. The car
shook a little, buffeted by a wave of movement that had started further
away. Ual pondered. He was the foreign minister: it was his job to make
decisions about the handling of relations with aliens, a previously
insignificant post. Now he was the center of political activity and he
wasn't sure if he could handle it with the confidence of the senior
cabinet, the ministers who managed interstate relations on Umeh itself.
Ual looked on his previous backwater status with sudden
nostalgia. Then the car lurched. "We'll soon have you back now, sir,"
said the driver. "The city safety patrol has opened a passage. You sort
those humans out, sir. They're nothing but trouble."
Ual pulled the covers down on the car's windows,
suddenly overwhelmed. The sight of pressed bodies outside was like a
prophecy.
When he reached his office the cool pale aquamarine
stone seemed less like welcome relief from the street crowds and more
like frightening isolation. His assistant, Mas Lij, indicated the
communications screen.
"There is another message for you from the FEU," said
Lij. "Birsen Ertegun is anxious to talk to you."
Ual settled on the slab of smooth-polished black
basalt--a costly extravagance--and rested his legs. The message was two
hours old and showed the human minister Ertegun--he noted her new
status--in a carefully managed pose, hands folded on her desk. Despite
that, she showed the signs of human agitation that the ussissi had
noted among those in Umeh Station--rapid blinking and licking of their
wet fleshy mouths. Ual couldn't blame her. He shared her fear.
The FEU foreign minister began by repeating her apology
and the message that she had broadcast for the benefit of the wess'har.
She asked if Ual thought they should evacuate all humans on Umeh, and
reminded him that the ship Thetis was less
than a year into its return journey to Earth and could be turned back.
Ual had started to learn the intricacies of the human
mind. He considered the offer.
"We should retrieve our people," said Ralassi. He meant
ussissi, Ual knew, but he chose to interpret our
in the widest sense. "We have nothing to gain from this mission."
"Should I tell them about Eqbas Vorhi, do you think?"
"They might as well know the seriousness of their
situation."
The isenj party and their ussissi interpreters were
still on board Thetis even though the
humans had already withdrawn their own people from the ship. The
invitation to visit Earth seemed fraught with danger now, and not only
for humans. For the past year the humans' news had been full of
objections to inviting aliens to Earth,
although they seemed to have no problem with inviting themselves to the
planets of others.
"Turning back Thetis will
solve the FEU's political problems with the rest of Earth's
governments," Ralassi offered.
"And effectively end the alliance with us, too."
Ual could ship the humans back. Umeh wouldn't be a
potential target any more. But it would take more than one Earth year
for Thetis to loop back, and Ual had no
idea if Umeh had that much time left to appease the wess'har. They acted.
They tended not to think.
Ual continued to listen to Ertegun's message.
He wondered if the minister realized that he already
knew the scientist Mohan Rayat was, as Lindsay Neville put it, a spook.
Ual considered replying to say as much,
but he had learned a lot from Eddie Michallat about harnessing the ebb
and flow of information. He began composing his reply carefully and
searched for the correct phrase to indicate that Dr. Rayat might care
to present himself to the wess'har authorities too.
This was the Game. He would play it.
The crisis may be
twenty-five light-years away but that makes it no less urgent. We
cannot tolerate a situation where the FEU, and the FEU alone, has
contact with these alien governments. The FEU has no mandate to plunge
the world into a state of war with nations we have never met. We now
have diplomacy by newscast, and that is intolerable. We insist that use
of the ITX link be made freely available to this chamber immediately or
sanctions must follow.
JIM MATSOUKIS,
senior Pacific Rim States delegate
to the United Nations
Umeh Station, Jejeno,
northern hemisphere of Umeh, August 2376.
Lindsay Neville just stood back. She
should have intervened, but she was no longer Mart Barencoin's
commanding officer. She wasn't anyone's commanding officer any more.
The marine was still limping a little from the gunshot
wound to his leg but his aggression was obviously fit and well. He
blocked Mohan Rayat's progress across the plaza of the crowded biodome.
It was hard not to attract a crowd in this place.
"So you're the boss fella now, are you?" Barencoin was
tall, solid and intimidating. However thoroughly he shaved, he always
looked as if he'd spent the last forty-eight hours lying in a
shell-scrape on observation. "Well, seeing as I'm now way outside the
Forces Discipline Act, here's a token of my appreciation as a civilian."
He punched Rayat hard in the face. His fist made a wet crack
when it landed and Rayat went down with an
unh.
There was an aaah
of surprise from the remnants of Actaeon's
company and the civilian contractors. Marine Jon Becken grabbed
Barencoin's arm and pulled him away.
A couple of onlookers broke into spontaneous applause.
Barencoin shook off Becken's grip and turned to a
couple of Regulating Branch ratings, Actaeon's
internal police. He massaged his hand. "Okay, I'm done. You can stick
me on a charge now."
"Never saw a thing," said the shorter of the two men. "It's a
bugger, this bad eyesight."
"Mart, for Chrissakes." Becken had a white-knuckled
grip on his arm. "Leave it, will you?"
Lindsay wandered over and stood with her arms folded
while Rayat got to his feet, a fat trickle of blood issuing from one
nostril. He wiped it on his sleeve as if he was used to dusting himself
down after a fight.
"I hope that's proved cathartic," he said, staring at
Barencoin. Maybe he was considering revisiting the argument later.
"Would you like me to spell that for you?"
"Patronizing twat." But Becken held on to Barencoin's
arm.
They had an audience, and that was no bad thing.
Lindsay wasn't taking the flak alone. She made a mock introductory
gesture in Rayat's direction. "Okay, in case any of you didn't see the
news, this is the man who decided to use the Beano bombs. He's an
intelligence officer. Spy, spook, respected member of the intelligence
community--take your pick. Have I missed anything out?"
She had been immersed in the confidential world of
need-to-know and secure information from the day she had taken her
officer's commission as a student. She could hardly believe she had
publicly denounced someone as a spy. For all that Rayat had done, the
act still felt wildly dangerous. But she was damned if he was going to
run this place. She wanted him frozen out.
"Yeah. Why use any bombs at all?" The question came
from a civilian engineer in an orange coverall. The woman didn't look
pleased. "What did you target?"
Lindsay gathered her thoughts. Shan was dead. Ouzhari
was scoured clean. Aras was beyond anyone's reach and nobody knew about
Ade Bennett. She decided it was time for the truth.
"A biohazard. A biohazard some of your companies would
have killed to get hold of."
"That's smart," said Rayat. He was standing quite
still, looking wary of tipping them into a mob with the wrong move. But
he still didn't look as scared as she felt. In fact, he didn't look
scared at all. "Any other classified information you want to divulge?"
"It's that immortality thing, isn't it?" said a
construction driver.
"Yes," said Lindsay. "And I'll leave you to work out
just how responsibly we'd make use of that back home."
The ussissi interpreters who worked for the isenj were
standing in a pack by the plaza's central fountain. If the dome had
been completed and the number of people housed in it had been halved,
it would have been a pleasant deployment. But it wasn't. People were
angry and crowded and scared. And the ussissi gave every sign of being
equally angry animals who might turn on humans at any time.
Only the isenj--patient, unfathomable, quill-covered
bulks on spider legs--seemed to be going about their business on site.
Lindsay imagined that any species forced to live at such close quarters
as the overcrowded isenj had developed a high level of tolerance to
adversity. They watched--or Lindsay assumed they watched, as they had
no
discernible eyes--while the humans wrangled.
"Who's got primacy here, the military or the sponsors?"
"Why have they cut our comms?"
"We're going to be stuck here for twenty-five years
whatever happens."
Rad Jaros, the engineer who had taken on the task of
managing the logistics of the emergency, scrambled onto the flatbed of
a transport and got instant silence when he stood up. That was
something Shan could do, too, but Lindsay knew she never could.
"That guy there's right," said Jaros, pointing into the
crowd. "If we're lucky, we're stuck here for the next quarter century.
If we're not, the wess'har will fry us, and there's sod all anyone can
do about that because there's nowhere to run and nobody's coming to
rescue us. So we make the best of it and get this place running
properly. We had a schedule before all this happened and now we just
have to adjust the numbers. Okay?"
"Who do you want running this place?" asked Lindsay.
"Not you or that spy, that's for sure," said a voice
from the crowd. "And who's going to enforce the bugger's authority
anyway? Our companies paid for most of this project. So we'll bloody
well run this ourselves."
Rayat had never struck Lindsay as a fool. He was on his
own out here: whatever government muscle he might have called upon back
on Earth was now a lifetime away. He didn't even have a hand-weapon. He
faced the thickening crowd.
"I think it's important that we maintain some sense of
order here," he said carefully. His hands were relaxed, palms down,
making placatory gestures of the kind that you learned would defuse
trouble. "If you would rather have a civilian administration, then I'm
happy to explain that to the Foreign Office when we make contact with
them."
"Who's the ranking naval officer here?" Lindsay asked.
There was silence while everyone in a uniform--ratings
and junior officers--looked around them. The reality of the loss of
life
in Actaeon was sobering. A stocky freckled
woman with a lieutenant's double gold stripe on both shoulder boards
raised her hand.
"Cargill, ma'am."
"Well, Cargill, you're admiral of the fleet out here,"
said Lindsay. "Make the most of it."
Lindsay found it harder to think more than a day ahead
now. She withdrew to a quiet corner behind one of the water purifiers
and sat down with her back against the gently vibrating pump housing.
Through the transparent panels of the dome she could see the dense,
intricate mass that was the city of Jejeno, separated from this little
fragment of Earth by a moat of service roads. It was the only scrap of
open space in the city.
What now?
When she had arrived on Bezer'ej nearly two years ago,
she had focused on completing the mission and going home to a
promotion. When she learned she was pregnant in an alien world, she
aimed to cope with that, and no more. When David died just a few weeks
old, she existed to exact revenge on Shan Frankland for not using c'naatat
to save him. And then she had seen the
reason why Shan could never save David, and she had taken on the task
of ensuring c'naatat never fell into the
hands of either government or commerce.
It was all about having a goal. But now she had no goal
at all.
She shut her eyes and tried to visualize herself the
following day, functioning normally and looking ahead. But she couldn't
see herself beyond the moment. Perhaps basic survival would occupy her.
She braced her elbows on her knees and thought about David, buried in
alien soil with a glass headstone to mark his small grave, then let her
head sink into her hands.
"Welcome to the world of the leper," said Mohan Rayat,
and sat down beside her. "You learn to cope with ingratitude in this
job."
"Sod off," she said.
"Eddie," trilled Giyadas, gravely serious.
"They're coming. What will they be like?"
The wess'har child walked briskly alongside him, a
little seahorse princess just a meter tall but who could already break
his arm if she wanted. Eddie Michallat was relieved that she liked him.
Wess'har females were formidable, and they started young.
"I've got no idea, sweetheart," he said. "I've seen the
same images that you have. But they're still wess'har, same as you,
whatever they look like. You'll have lots in common. You've been
learning their language, haven't you?"
"We all have." She meant her family, the four males and
their offspring who had been taken in by Nevyan when their own
matriarch died. Wess'har didn't appear to have stepchild issues. "But
we still don't know what they're really like. Nevyan says we left Eqbas
Vorhi ten thousand years ago. That sounds like a very long time."
"It is. We were just about discovering how to build
cities then."
"Are you really a backward species, Eddie?"
Cute. And tactlessly
true, and healthy to be reminded of the chilling reality of not being
at the top of the food chain any longer. He had to put his hands up to
it. "'Fraid so, sweetheart. Unfortunately, our technology is way ahead
of us."
F'nar's autumn weather was cool rather than cold but
the pearl layer gave the impression of a heavy frost. Eddie was almost
as used to its optical illusions as to its over-length days and higher
gravity. On this overcast morning, his room in Nevyan's home had been
flooded with a cold white light that made him think he had woken up to
overnight snowfall.
It could have been a magical experience. But the threat
of a war that he couldn't leave behind on the next available flight
stripped the gloss from it. He was heading to the Exchange of Surplus
Things to hear about the next escalation in the conflict with the
humans.
"I still think it's odd that you lot haven't stayed in
contact with each other," said Eddie. Eqbas Vorhi had responded to
Wess'ej's appeal for military support. If Wess'ej represented the
isolationist liberals, the Eqbas were going to make interesting
neighbors. "We would."
"What would the purpose of that be if we wished to lead
separate lives? And your species originated in Earth's tropics. Do you
stay in touch with Africa every day?"
Giyadas had him there. Even the kids here had that
inexorable in-your-face logic from an early age.
The wess'har around him seemed as agitated by the
prospect as Eddie was. He was passing through a phase of being stunned
by how alien they were. The novelty of seeing extraterrestrial life in
the flesh had palled quickly, but that was when he was buffered by the
company of other humans. Now he was the
minority alien, living in an alien household, and he had become
increasingly aware that the only other creature on the planet that
looked remotely like him was Ade. Even Aras--reshaped by his c'naatat
over the years into a theatrical
approximation of a man--was two meters tall and built like an armored
vehicle. And he had claws.
"Doesn't Nevyan worry when you're out on your own,
kid?" Giyadas was probably the equivalent of a human six-year-old. She
kept up with him as he walked towards the Exchange, her tufted mane of
amber hair like a Spartan soldier's helmet. It was like looking down on
a rocking horse. "Did you tell her you were going out?"
"Why should she worry?"
"Well, what if--"
Eddie stopped himself from explaining what could happen
to a small child out on its own on Earth. No, there were no what-ifs in
F'nar. Anyone could walk down its terraces in complete safety. Wess'har
were communal, responsible creatures who regarded the exploitation of
any other animal as the worst possible crime. There were no gangs, no
speeding traffic, and no muggers.
And then--suitably provoked--wess'har would wage war
without pity and wipe out millions. Chilled or
punching--that was how Shan had described them. They didn't have
a middle setting. Humankind was about to find out what wess'har were
like when they were really punching.
"I want to go to Mar'an'cas," said Giyadas. The isanket
was taking her future role as a
matriarch seriously. Talking to her was like blotting old-fashioned
ink, the information instantly absorbed and faithfully reproduced yet
somehow reversed. "I want to see the gethes
from Constantine colony."
"Why?"
"To see why they're different from you. I want to know
why they killed the bezeri."
"They didn't, sweetheart. They helped someone else do
it. And it was just a couple of them. They believe in God and that
makes humans do some pretty strange things."
Giyadas skipped a step. "Sergeant Bennett said it was bollocks
because if there was a real god he
wouldn't let humans behave the way they do."
So Ade Bennett had taken on the mantle of teaching the
wess'har inappropriate English. They'd already absorbed way too much
from Shan, and Giyadas was picking it up faster than any of them.
Eddie shrugged. "But the why doesn't matter to
wess'har, does it? You only care about what's done, not why it
was done."
"Knowing is not the same as caring. If we don't know
why, how can we stop it happening again?"
"You sure you're a kid and not just a bit short for a
wess'har?"
"I don't understand."
"Never mind." Eddie slowed as he merged with the crowd
of wess'har approaching the Exchange of Surplus Things. His instinct
was to grab Giyadas's hand and make sure she wasn't crushed, but the
adult wess'har towering above her gave her plenty of space. He took her
hand anyway and she looked up at him as if he were mad. "So you've been
talking to Ade, have you?"
"He wants his friends back."
"The other Royal Marines?"
"What's royal? What's the sea got to do with it?"
"It's just an old regimental title. They were sea-going
soldiers."
"Will he be our soldier now?"
"I don't know. I don't think any of us know what's
going to happen next."
But Ade couldn't go home again, not with the c'naatat
parasite colonizing his body.
The sergeant was sitting on a packing crate in the
Exchange of Surplus Things, the nearest that F'nar had to a center of
government, a great vaulted hall cut deep into the wall of rock that
cradled F'nar. It was a warehouse where wess'har deposited surplus
crops and took others that they needed, without tally or inventory, and
the bounty was never abused. It was the sort of system that would never
work on Earth in a million years.
Ade didn't look at all changed by c'naatat.
He still appeared on first glance like an anonymous, average bloke
somewhere in his thirties, maybe early, maybe late. It took another
glance to register that he was exceptionally fit and taking discreet
note of everything around him.
But he hadn't turned into a two-meter alien; whatever
the parasite was doing to him, it was doing it internally. He nodded
acknowledgment but didn't get up. Eddie sat down beside him and Giyadas
stood staring into his impassive face, far too close to be anything but
annoying.
"Hi," said Ade, cornered. His voice always seemed too
soft for a man who was supposed to bark orders. "You're growing fast,
aren't you?"
"Are you remembering what Shan remembered?"
"Sometimes, sweetie."
"You must find that a comfort."
Then she disappeared into the crowd to find Nevyan.
They were nearly all males and even Nevyan--shorter than the average
matriarch--stood almost a head above them.
"I think they're about fifty when they're born," said
Eddie.
"They don't so much grow up as acquire more knowledge."
"That's very perceptive."
Ade glanced at him sideways and Eddie knew he had seen
that warning expression before. It was Shan's. Nobody knew just how
many components of a previous host c'naatat
would whip out like a conjuring trick. This looked like one of them.
"I wasn't being patronizing," said Eddie, responding to
the disapproval of a dead woman.
"The kid's wrong. I don't find it comforting."
"You getting flashbacks? Aras does, all the time."
"Yeah, one in particular. A gorilla and the bloody
awful feeling of having let someone down when they needed me."
"I can tell you about the gorilla."
"Later, maybe." Ade had a quiet finality about him when
he wanted to change the subject. "What are we waiting for? Match of the
Day?"
"Live from Eqbas Vorhi."
"They don't play soccer, do they?"
"No. They don't play anything. Apparently Nevyan's
going to be talking to a couple of Eqbas matriarchs. What we're looking
at is a city called Surang."
The huge image in the wall--part of the stone itself, it
seemed--showed a static view of Surang, at once wholly familiar to
Eddie
yet shocking. It was every live news feed from a foreign city that he
had ever seen, and he half-expected a colleague to amble into shot,
adjust an audio implant and ask the gallery how long it was to air.
And it was also a window onto an alien city that was
exotic even to the wess'har around him.
Surang was astonishing. It was the first shot he'd seen
that took in so much of the city skyline, all impossible curves and
billowing organic shapes that reached up into the sky like a growth of
oyster mushrooms on a tree. There was a lot of vegetation; but there
was also plenty of building. If the wess'har in F'nar built to avoid
being seen, then their cousins appeared to represent the less discreet
pole of architectural philosophy.
Surang was a statement, whether it meant to be or not.
It said look what we can do, monkey boys.
Eddie wanted to get those pictures down the ITX as fast
as he could find a way of linking into the feed. The excitement boiled
in his gut.
"Can you imagine seeing our politicians holding talks
in public?"
"You'd be out of a job for a start." Ade scratched his
chin. "And so would I."
Something brushed against Eddie's leg. A displaced
throwback of a thought said cat but there
were no cats on Wess'ej. He half-turned and found himself looking down
into the matte black predator's eyes of Serrimissani.
"Hi, doll," he said. He liked the ussissi interpreter.
She was a sullen, savage, stroppy cow, but she had looked after him on
Umeh when the shit was flying. He owed her. "Missing Jejeno?"
"Not a city I care for," she said. Her little sibilant
girly voice was at odds with her mouthful of needle teeth. He'd felt
those in his shoulder once and he never wanted to feel them again. "And
Nevyan does not ask me to pour beverages, unlike Ual."
"I know it pisses you girls off to be told to fetch the
coffee."
"I am not deceived by your casual attitude. You grieve
for your friend, however casually you refer to her."
Eddie shrugged. "That's how we defend our feelings."
"Aras seems not to feel that need."
"We all cope in our own way." He fought an urge to
reach down and fondle Serrimissani's head like an animal. This is
not your pet. This is a person. He
settled for squatting at eye level rather than gazing down on her from
a lordly height. "So what are you up to?"
"I have advised Nevyan of the isenj way of conducting
themselves."
"She's never actually had any contact with one, has
she?"
"No living wess'har has met isenj, except for Aras and
a few troops."
Met was an odd word to
describe warfare. "I really miss Ual."
Serrimissani slitted her eyes at him, lips compressed.
Her contempt could be pretty transparent. But he still counted her as a
friend even though she made no attempt at small talk while they waited.
Nevyan arrived, with no minders or minions clearing a
path and no visible deference. Nevyan's mother Mestin, once the
dominant matriarch of the ruling clique, watched from the sidelines.
Of all the bizarre facets of the wess'har character,
this was the one that Eddie was finding the hardest to grasp. Leaders
simply happened by dint of their hormonal
dominance, and once they happened, they got on with the job. Wess'har
had unforgivingly high expectations of their informal governors. It was
a duty, not a privilege, and nobody clawed their way to the top or
maneuvered for position. Nevyan had fallen into the role; her primeval
protective instinct had kicked into overdrive when Shan died.
It was both terrifying and reassuring. Wess'har were
militantly altruistic. Eddie wondered how that tendency manifested
itself in their bigger, brasher cousins.
Giyadas, apparently satisfied that her stepmother had
arrived, returned and sat next to Eddie with all the composure of a
duchess.
The two wess'har races didn't speak the same language
after such a long separation but they were learning as fast as they
could with the assistance of ussissi aides. Eddie wondered if humans
would turn out to be the only species in the galaxy that took so long
to learn languages.
"Do I need to do that voice thing?" asked Eddie. "The
double sounds?"
"How will anyone understand you otherwise?" said
Giyadas.
"Do overtones make much difference?"
Giyadas did some rapid head-cocking, staring at a point
ahead of her. "Are say and stay different in English?"
"Yes." She had actually asked a rhetorical question. He
never thought the hyper-literal adult wess'har did that, let alone a
small child. Smart kid. "Point taken. Is
that it? Just pronunciation?"
"No."
"What, then?"
Giyadas looked as if she was searching his face for
something. "If you say ripe fruit, then
one word follows the other. If we say ripe fruit,
we say both words at the same time. If we say someone is eating
ripe fruit, then that is one word too.
There is often one word for the basic things. For new things, we add
words together to express them."
"I can tell you've never been paid by the word," said
Eddie. He shut his eyes for a moment and imagined a three-dimensional
tonal language with a huge and specific core vocabulary and then even
more torturous compounds. Shan had said wess'u grammar itself was
simple. He couldn't imagine how.
"Perhaps I could write wess'u," he said.
Giyadas enjoyed teaching. "Show me your screen."
Eddie pulled out the sheet and set it to graphic mode.
Giyadas prodded a long, four-jointed finger into the fabric and
scrawled what looked like the contents of a whiteboard from a
management brainstorming session, all radiating curves and symbols like
a fishbone diagram. He couldn't see a beginning or end, just a single
maze of symbols. Even Chinese and Arabic were linear. Written wess'u
wasn't made for human brains.
"There," she said. "That is much simpler."
Eddie, a man who lived by his talent for speaking and
writing, was now effectively an illiterate, and a mute illiterate at
that. "Do you people ever do straight lines?" he asked. "Okay, you be
my interpreter. Maybe you can teach me in time."
The wall image changed, tilting down to show a ussissi
draped in multicolored fabric belts. She spoke in wess'u and Eddie
glanced down at Giyadas, indulging her growing sense of preparation for
matriarchy.
"What's she saying?"
"That Sarmatakian Ve will be talking soon. She's the
adviser to the matriarch Curas Ti."
Eddie couldn't imagine any human politician taking a
sensitive call from another state with the electorate watching. They'd
rather screw in public than be seen getting screwed over. But what
Nevyan was doing was a logical, extraordinary extension of the
cooperative way wess'har had evolved. Lying wasn't an option when you
were consciously aware of scent signals, either. Their transparency was
more intimidating than charming.
Sarmatakian Ve and the matriarch Curas Ti didn't look
like any wess'har Eddie had met. They were stockier, darker, and
short-faced; it was as if a designer had been sent in to update the
model for a new market. They looked like… aliens.
"Boy, you people evolve fast," said Eddie. He made a
quick comparison with Giyadas. The wess'har genome was fluid; they
exchanged DNA like some bacteria. "No wonder c'naatat
likes wess'har hosts."
Giyadas gave him that almost canine head-tilt that
showed she was concentrating hard on him. "Do you want me to translate?"
"Sorry. Carry on."
"They say that there is another ship being diverted to
this sector, a larger one. A mission is being prepared on Eqbas Vorhi.
They would like more information in the meantime."
"About what?"
"About gethes, about
Wess'ej, about Umeh. About everything."
Eddie had a thought.
"Has anyone told them exactly what c'naatat
is?"
Giyadas tilted her head further. It gave crosslike
wess'har pupils a better focus on the object of their curiosity. "I
don't know."
"I wonder what they're going to make of it?" said Eddie.
We have waited
many generations for this. The wess'har want us to hand over the two
humans responsible for wiping out the bezeri. I say that we should
agree to this only if they hand over the Destroyer of Mjat, Aras Sar
Iussan. We have never had justice for the destruction of our colony on
Asht, and the loss of millions of isenj lives must surely warrant at
least the same penalty as tens of thousands of bezeri.
PAR SHOMEN EIT,
Supplies Minister,
Isenj Northern Assembly
October 2376, Pajat coast,
Wess'ej.
Mar'an'cas was a striking landmark but it
seemed the most inhospitable place on Wess'ej.
Aras had never seen the island before. It jutted out of
the sea off the coast near Pajatis, well to the north of F'nar, almost
far enough north to be as cold as his home city of Iussan. The
matriarch Bur had sent a guide with Aras and Ade Bennett to make sure
they didn't miss it.
Aras doubted anyone could. It looked like something
huge and shapelessly gray had punched its way out of the sea and then
frozen.
"Looks fucking grim," said Ade.
"Not as grim as remaining on Bezer'ej."
It certainly wasn't Constantine. But then that island
on Bezer'ej had been equally incapable of supporting human agriculture
until Aras created a shielded environment for the colonists. Mar'an'cas
was now secure behind the same type of biobarrier; the colony might yet
rebuild itself, physically at least. Its emotional integrity was
another matter.
I killed Josh. If they say they
forgive me, I shall tell them the bezeri don't forgive him, and neither
do I.
The Pajat guide indicated the shallow-draft boat on the
shoreline. "I can steer the vessel for you," he said. "If your business
is brief, I can wait."
"I'll drive," said Ade. The marine pushed the craft
into the shallows and climbed inboard with the ease of someone who had
spent a lot of time on amphibious missions. He checked the controls,
holding his hands above the touchpad carefully and moving them to see
what response it produced. "I do this for a living. Come on, Aras.
Let's get this over with."
Their business would not be brief.
Aras watched Ade carefully as he steered the boat out
from shore, making a good first attempt at the hand movements needed to
direct the vessel. He had stripped all the marks of rank from his
uniform, from the sergeant's chevron stripes to the little wreathed
globe emblem on his beret. He smelled strongly of anger.
"You're upset about your dismissal," said Aras.
"Too bloody right I am. Twenty-three years in the Corps
and I don't even get the courtesy of a court martial."
"It's what Eddie calls political expedience. He doubts
your command was involved in the decision."
"Ain't that always the way."
"You needn't feel ashamed."
"I don't. I'm disgraced.
That's not the same thing." He opened the throttle with an upward
gesture of his hand and the boat picked up speed. "I can live with what
I've done, but I don't see why the detachment should be dishonored
because of what that stupid cow Neville did."
The spray from the bows threw a hail of icy water in
Aras's face and he turned aside. Even if he was infinitely resilient,
he still felt the cold. He wondered whether Ade really could live with
what he had done because he looked increasingly like a man who couldn't.
This gethes shot
my isan. He helped Lindsay Neville capture her.
His actions led to her taking her own life. I should loathe him. I
should punish him.
Aras had walked away from Ade more than once rather
than let his own grief and rage take over. Human and wess'har
definitions of responsibility clashed within him.
Shan chose to step out of the
airlock, so Lindsay Neville has to pay for that. No--that's a human
view. Neville has to pay for Ouzhari.
Shan had liked Ade very much and wouldn't have wanted
him to come to any harm. Aras liked him too. The c'naatat
that had entered his body carried with it a comforting scent that said house-brother.
Something of Shan was in him and
Aras's primeval wess'har instinct kicked in, making him bond with males
who had his isan's genes. Through the same
instinctive mechanism, he identified qualities in Ade that his isan
might transfer to him through copulation.
Wess'har males influenced their isan's
mating choices.
But there was no longer an isan,
and now there never would be.
"We could have seized Shan from the Actaeon
if they had taken her on board," said
Aras. "She had no need to space herself."
"I think she wanted to be absolutely certain the
parasite was unusable. You know how she hated leaving anything to
chance."
It was the first time in two months that they had
spoken this openly about her death, edging nervously around their
respective raw grief. Shan had left a void. Even Eddie seemed to be
feeling it, and Eddie had never looked like a man who cared about
anybody. Aras suspected it was a façade that members of his trade
adopted. For all his pretence of being untouched, the man was still
recording stories about Shan: the real story,
he called it, not the pack of lies that
others might commit to archive.
Irrelevant, all of it.
The forbidding island began filling their horizon.
There was no vegetation to be seen but as they drew closer Aras spotted
the sloping outlines of shelters. It was a very unwess'har thing to
mark the landscape with visible, permanent structures, but the
displaced colonists had no time to excavate shelters in the ground. He
wondered if the stony terrain would permit that at all.
Constantine's underground colony had taken years to
carve into the rock. He remembered it all. He remembered helping Ben
Garrod, Josh's ancestor, excavate deep into the ground. He recalled how
he took part in building--no, carving--the church of St. Francis and
creating the indulgent but beautiful stained-glass window with its
saint surrounded by animals.
Aras hadn't understood what a saint was. Saints often
died for their beliefs. He wondered if Josh Garrod's god would make him
a saint now because Aras had killed him.
He found he was thinking aloud. "I shouldn't blame
you," Aras said. "I killed Josh and he was my friend. His
great-great-great grandfather was my friend and each generation after
him. But when it came to duty I did what was necessary, even if I still
cared for him."
Aras juggled two opposing impulses again. Ade had
played a role in Shan's death. He was also his brother.
Ade's jaw muscles twitched. "You think I did what was necessary
to Shan?" He held his gaze. "Sometimes
I really think you want to kill me."
"I can no longer see situations with a wess'har's
clarity, Adrian. I have become too human. You were ordered
to act, and no wess'har really understands the imperative that humans
experience."
Ade leaned on the control console, making the
occasional casual hand gesture to correct course.
"Only my mum called me Adrian," he said quietly. "Just
call me Ade, will you?"
"Very well."
"And only following orders
is a pathetic excuse. I had a choice and I didn't make it." He rubbed
his nose and suddenly looked out to sea, hands on hips, although there
was nothing out there worth his attention. "You know what I did? I
emptied a whole clip into her. I aimed low because I knew she'd wear
body armor and I knew nothing would kill her and I knew that hitting
her legs could drop her for long enough to get restraints on her. Now,
if I'd had the balls I could have just put a couple of rounds in
Neville and Rayat and nobody would have been any the wiser. Twenty-five
fucking light-years away, no enquiry, no post-mortem. But I didn't. And
I fucking hate myself for that."
Ade lapsed back into silence, head bowed for a moment,
then turned to the helm with a tell-tale glaze of moisture across his
eyes. Eventually he slowed the boat to run up onto the beach. He seemed
to find some solace in using his skills. Aras jumped out to help him
drag the craft a little further up the shore and their eyes met for one
uncomfortable second too long.
"That's all hindsight, Ade."
"Maybe."
"All your indoctrination is to obey your commanding
officer. Human society relies on unthinking compliance."
"Well, I'm not completely human any more so they can
shove their compliance up their arse."
Aras understood his pain, and it was
pain, not simple anger. He had been abandoned too. Communal as they
were, wess'har didn't expend energy on hostage or prisoner retrieval,
and Aras could still recall how utterly abandoned and hopeless he felt
five hundred years ago when he sat in an isenj prison awaiting the next
visit from his captors. He'd done what was asked of him as a soldier.
Then he was simply one effort too many. He felt that even more strongly
since he had known Ade.
His isenj captors had never stopped reminding him that
they always went back for their own.
The biobarrier gave Aras a stinging jolt as he stepped
through it. On Bezer'ej, the invisible fence that maintained
Constantine's ecology and separated it from the rest of the planet
simply prickled on exposed skin. This barrier was several magnitudes
stronger. Nobody was taking chances on contamination, however unlikely
it seemed that anything would cross the species barrier.
There were more than a thousand men, women and children
now living on Mar'an'cas. It wasn't the entire colony. Aras knew that a
few had refused evacuation from Bezer'ej and were prepared to risk the
engineered anti-human pathogen that the wess'har had spread across the
planet as a barrier to further landings.
It had been created from Shan's own DNA. Aras had been
angry that she hadn't told him she had donated tissue, but now he knew
he wouldn't have wasted a single second on anger had he known she would
be taken from him so soon.
"Let me go on ahead," said Ade. "If you get any crap
from them about Josh--"
"I don't require your protection," said Aras. "But I
appreciate the offer."
Wess'har had perfect recall. The memoriesAras had
struggled to ignore now refused to be brushed aside and pursued him,
tormenting him. He remembered exactly how it felt when his tilgir
hit Josh in the left side of the neck and
the impact traveled up both his arms as his blade severed his friend's
head. He could feel it now. He could hear the absolute silence that
lasted seconds and then the rising crescendo of wails and screams from
the colonists who had witnessed the execution. He could smell the smoke
when the ussissi burned the body.
But you helped Lindsay Neville
deploy the bombs that poisoned the bezeri, Josh. You deserved what I
gave you.
It was a very human feeling and it wasn't his. Wess'har
balancing was much more detached. This was a remnant of Shan Frankland,
locked into him forever by the capacity for genetic memory that c'naatat
had taken a fancy to when it passed
through an isenj. Aras wondered how much of his own and Shan's memories
would now be surfacing in Ade Bennett's mind. And he wondered how he
had drawn a line between Josh's complicity and Ade's.
Two figures in dappled camouflage uniforms came into
view, a man and a woman, marines called Bulwant Singh Chahal and Ismat
Qureshi. They weren't strangers. Nobody on this island was. Aras knew
them all.
"Hello, Sarge. Hello, sir." Qureshi looked at Aras and
nodded her head, but her attention was directed towards Ade. "You okay,
Ade?"
"I'm fine. You?"
"We were worried when we lost your signal," said
Chahal. He held out his hand and the luminous green display that was
grown into his palm danced with data. It was battlefield tech, a living
computer and communications device that monitored and tracked and
reported. Human soldiers were full of implants.
Ade held up his own palm: it was blankly normal human
skin, pink and creased and devoid of light.
"Shit," said Chahal. "What happened to your bioscreen?"
"Long story," said Ade. "It went for a walk with my
implants."
Qureshi and Chahal glanced at each other. "Okay," she
said. "What do we do now?"
"Fuck all," said Ade.
"What's up?"
"The bastards have binned us. We're all dismissed the
service."
Aras hadn't known Ade to use profanities as liberally
and unthinkingly as Shan or Eddie; his language was an indication of
his distress. Belonging and not belonging to a formal group seemed to
matter enormously to him. It seemed to matter to Chahal and Qureshi,
too. Their skins, usually quite dark compared to Ade's, took on a
yellow cast as the blood vessels constricted. They weren't expecting
the news. They swallowed hard and fidgeted for a few moments.
"That's what you came to tell us?" said Chahal. "That
we've just been marooned here?"
"That's about the size of it."
"Don't we even get a hearing?"
"Seems not. The FEU told the wess'har they can do what
they like with us."
Qureshi and Chahal looked at Aras as if expecting even
worse news. They knew what he had done to a scientist from Thetis
for causing the death of a single bezeri
infant, and what happened to Josh. He imagined they were scaling up the
consequences for being a member of the force that had managed to kill
many thousands more, and fearing the worst.
"Nevyan says you're welcome to stay," said Aras
carefully. "You won't be punished. Neville and Rayat will, though, when
we find them."
Qureshi's gaze darted between Ade and Aras. "What about
Mart and Sue and Jon?"
"If they wish to join you, they can."
Chahal looked dubious. It was a very distinct human
expression, chin lowered, eyebrows raised. "This isn't how wess'har
normally operate, is it? What's the catch?"
"The catch, as you put it, is that Shan
Chail had great regard for you and that regard is respected.
More to the point, you are not personally accountable for your
commander's actions."
"Neither was anyone in Actaeon."
"Actaeon was given time to
evacuate the uninvolved. Those who stayed on board chose to do so."
Ade stepped in, suddenly the sergeant again. "Chaz,
just shut it. We nuked the fucking place. There's no moral high ground."
Chahal glanced at Qureshi as if seeking a cue. She had
always looked too slight to be a soldier, but she looked even thinner
now. It was a testament to the ordeal of the last few weeks.
"We're really sorry about Frankland," she said. "I just
wanted you to know that."
Aras wasn't sure if the comment was for him or Ade.
Either way he had nothing to say.
"Show me the colony," he said.
They walked in a line behind Qureshi, totally silent.
Two hundred meters away from the shore, Aras got a better view of the
tents. Aras thought immediately of one of little Rachel Garrod's
storybooks with their bright illustrations. The tents were made of
elegant turquoise and green patterned wess'har fabric but sewn to the
colony's design, looking more like one of the humans' carnivals than a
refugee camp.
"Jesus Christ," said Ade. "Hell with soft furnishings."
The Pajat clans had done their best to help out in the
emergency but there was a limit to what could be done to make more than
a hundred farming families comfortable on a rock. Even though the tents
were set in neat lines, it still looked like chaos. The first thing
Aras noticed was the constant backdrop of children crying and the
flapping of fabric in the wind. Then he noticed the smell.
"We're working on the water and waste," said Chahal. "Sue Webster's
really the expert on that. If she wants to come here, we
could use her."
And these were orderly humans. These were people used
to a tough agricultural life and to following rules of survival on a
hostile planet. But they were not the generation that had carved
Constantine colony out of the rock of Bezer'ej nearly two centuries
ago, and they were finding the experience hard.
"At least we've got the hydroponics rigged," said
Qureshi. She turned up her collar against the wind. "We've got salad.
Just in time for winter. Nice."
"The bezeri won't see another winter," said Aras.
He walked into the camp. Faces he knew--some well,
others not--stared back at him and he found himself at the center of a
silence that was spreading like a pool of water. The expressions that
he met were hard and hostile. What else did he expect? He had killed
Josh Garrod, their leader, his friend. They were seeing him as he was
for the first time--an alien, a complete stranger whose ethical code
was
ultimately at odds with theirs.
Aras didn't understand; his actions were even enshrined
in their religious texts. Thou shalt give life
for life, eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot,
burning for burning, wound for wound, stripe for stripe. What
did that mean? If it meant a punishment that mirrored the magnitude of
the crime, then none of them should have been spared, innocent or not;
all the gethes for all the bezeri, just as
it said in their Bible. But there were many things in that book that
they chose to overlook when it suited them.
Ade prodded him in the back. "I don't think this is a
good idea, mate. Let's go."
"I have to see Josh's family."
"Just leave it, okay?"
Aras couldn't. He wanted to, but he had spent most of
his life among these people and their forebears and he found it hard to
cut himself off from them. The human genes in him were mainly theirs,
gleaned by c'naatat from their bacteria
and shed cells. The colonists were almost family. For generations,
before Shan came into his life, they had
been family.
Ade walked in front of him. He held his rifle by the
hand guard and grip, but his finger rested outside the trigger guard.
He was checking to either side as if on patrol.
"They can't hurt us," said Aras reproachfully.
"I don't want any more accidental contamination."
"They know what I am. They've never shown any interest
in c'naatat. But they don't know what you
are."
Ade held his rifle a little higher. "I wasn't planning
on hugging any of them."
"Bastard," said one of the men as they passed.
Aras hadn't experienced abuse for five centuries, not
since his isenj captors had told him what a filthy murderer he was and
that he deserved the tortures he was enduring. He was surprised how
much simple words stung. The two centuries that he had spent ensuring
that the Constantine colony survived were obviously forgotten.
Aras stopped and turned round.
"Leave it, Aras," said Ade. He had been trained to
ignore that kind of provocation. But Aras hadn't, and he genuinely
wanted them to understand why Josh had to die.
The man who had called him a bastard was named David,
he recalled, just like Lindsay Neville's dead infant son. David had two
daughters and his wife taught at the colony school. He took a step back
as Aras faced him.
"Do you know what genocide is, David?"
David smelled of acid fear. "Josh never set out to harm
the bezeri."
"And still they're dead. Your god might care about your
intentions, but I don't and neither would the bezeri. If Josh had
helped destroy beings who looked like you, would you understand better?"
"The parasite had to be destroyed."
"It was a life-form like you or me. Do you know what
else lived on Ouzhari?"
"No."
"And now you never will. Did you think what else the
bombs might destroy, or did you think a neutron device and the cobalt
poison would be selective in their action?"
David stared back into his face. The scent of frying
garlic jostled for attention with the smell of the latrines. "But you know
us. The Garrods were your family."
"My family was Shan Frankland," Aras said quietly. "And
she's dead too."
Ade took his elbow and pressed gently. "Come on. Let's
find Deborah Garrod and get this over with."
Word traveled ahead. Deborah was waiting for him,
standing outside an incongruously patterned tent and holding
six-year-old Rachel by the hand. Her teenaged son James, as square and
lean as his father, watched Aras suspiciously. He stood a little in
front of his mother.
Deborah said nothing. She had a fine-boned oriental
face and fatigue had painted dark circles under her eyes. James
disappeared inside the tent and came out cradling something in his arms.
"We can't feed them," he said. "You take them."
Aras held out his hands to receive two live rats. Black
and White, as he'd named them, were laboratory animals he had
confiscated from Mohan Rayat soon after the Thetis
party landed on Bezer'ej. They had been young animals then, lively and
with fine silky coats, and now they were not. They were tubby and their
fur was coarser. They were aging fast, as rats did, and they scrabbled
to get inside his coat for shelter.
"Where are the others?" asked Aras. He felt the rats
burrow into the layers of his tunic and settle, little hearts pounding.
They had a clean dry scent very much like a ussissi.
"We had to leave them. We set them free."
"But they have no food. They can't digest native
Bezer'ej plants. How could you do such a thing?"
"They're rats. You killed
my dad, and now you're worried about a few rats?"
Even now they didn't understand. Aras wondered how he
could ever have thought gethes could learn
that their lives were no more special than that of any other species.
It was their single defining belief; the colonists even said all gethes
were modeled on their god. It was
staggering conceit. And a god like a gethes
sounded monstrous.
Aras looked down at Rachel. Once she had rushed to
greet him and show him the drawings she had made on hemp paper. Now she
pressed into her mother's skirt, hiding her face.
Deborah gestured to James to go back inside the tent. "Aras, I'm
praying that I can eventually forgive you," she said. "And
I'm truly sorry for your loss."
"Do you understand why I did it?"
"No, Aras, I don't. And I never will."
He thought for a moment that she was going to use the
words punishment and sin.
She didn't, but he knew she would be thinking that he had at least paid
the same price that he had exacted from her.
"Come on," said Ade. "Enough."
They retraced their steps. Aras wondered if the thin
soil on Mar'an'cas could support so many and recalled how long it had
taken to get the soil of Constantine to the correct composition to
support terrestrial crops. It could be done, though. He'd grown the
colony's alien vegetables in F'nar for Shan, to make her feel at home.
He could do the same here.
At the perimeter of the camp, a hail of small stones
landed in front of them. The marines ducked and turned; some of the
colony youths were aiming at Aras.
"Little bleeders," Ade muttered. "So much for our model
community."
Another stone fell short. The youngsters closed the
gap. Ade stepped in front of Aras as if to block the missiles and a
fist-sized chunk hit him in the face. He staggered a few paces and then
recovered his balance.
"Fuck you," he said. "Fuck you."
Blood was running down his cheek. He picked up a large stone and threw
it back hard, catching one of the fleeing youths squarely in the back.
One of the adults grabbed the boy and cuffed him sharply across the
head.
"Sorry," the man called, fist still clutching the boy's
collar. "That wasn't meant for you."
"You okay, Ade?" said Qureshi. She rummaged in her belt
pouch and unwrapped a dressing. "Let's have a look at that."
Ade took the wad from her and moistened it from his
water bottle. He wiped the cut carefully. "No need, Izzy. I'll be fine."
"I heard it go crack," she said. "That's broken bone."
Qureshi took a step forward and he took one back. She
stared at him for a few seconds and then her expression changed; Aras
knew what she had seen. Ade's wound was already fading.
"Oh shit," she said. "Ade, what happened to you?"
"Don't ask."
"You've caught it, haven't you? That's why you
surrendered."
"It was an accident. Shan head-butted me when I was
trying to restrain her. It's spread by body fluids."
"Who else knows you've got it?"
"Lindsay Neville."
"Rayat?"
"By now, who knows?"
"Shit." Qureshi went as if to reach out to him and then
dropped her arms awkwardly as if afraid of contact. "You poor sod."
Aras wasn't sure whether Qureshi was more worried about
the consequences of discovery or Ade's prospect of permanent exile. She
seemed genuinely upset, reeking of agitation. Chahal just shook his
head.
"Are you going to come back to F'nar?" Ade asked.
"How can we?" Qureshi shrugged. "They need us here to
get sanitation and power running. At least we'll be doing something
we're trained for."
"And after that?"
"I don't know. I really don't. What about you?"
Ade glanced at Aras. "I'm staying."
The chances of any of them getting back to Earth looked
so remote as to make the comment superfluous. Aras felt Black and White
shifting position inside his tunic.
"When you want to leave this place, notify me,"
saidAras.
If there were surplus crops after Eddie and the rats
were fed, then he would send them to the marines. He wondered if they
might not all be better off on Umeh.
Ade was silent on the boat back to the mainland. At one
point he took the bloodstained wad of fabric out of his pocket and
stared at it as if the real nature of his condition was starting to
dawn on him.
"If your comrades had returned with you, what would you
have done?" Aras asked.
"I don't know," said Ade. "The last thing you want in
F'nar is a bunch of bored Booties hanging about. Maybe it's just as
well they're occupied elsewhere."
"I realize how distressing this is for you."
"I'm not the one they were aiming the stones at."
"I'm not that offended."
"You looked after that colony from day one. That's got
to hurt."
"I have greater pain to keep me occupied. And
disappointment. What is the one thing none of them asked?"
"Dunno."
"They didn't ask about the gene bank. They brought it
to this system for safekeeping. It was important enough for Shan to be
sent here to locate it. And now it is forgotten."
"But not by you."
"No. Not by me."
If Ade was seeking a new purpose in life, then so was
Aras. This seemed a fine one. When he had settled his scores with
Lindsay Neville and Mohan Rayat, then he would be trapped with
destructively bitter memories unless he moved forward. Restoring
Earth's endangered and extinct species was something Shan would have
wanted: she had cared enough to leave her life behind to retrieve the
gene bank for her government.
It was a very different gethes
government now. The wess'har held the gene bank. It was safely out of
human hands.
Aras wondered what an Earth without gethes
might be like.
Ual's forebears lived in his mind. He searched
the memory embedded in his genes and looked for wisdom from his fathers
and mothers before him, but there was nothing to prepare him for the
situation he faced now. He gripped hard on the data cube that Ralassi
had found for him, still disturbed by its images, and sought courage.
When he walked into the Northern Assembly debating
chamber the roar of angry sound hit him like a shock wave.
The scene before him was more like a street in Jejeno
when something had gone badly wrong--when someone had fallen or another
unplanned event had disrupted the flow of pedestrian traffic and thrown
up chaotic eddies and turbulence. The delegates were milling, arguing,
cursing. A choppy sea of glittering black shapes threatened to engulf
him; he felt he might drown if he slipped from the podium.
Of course they were in disarray. War had never actually
come close to Umeh itself before. They could all remember that and be
certain of the accuracy of the memory. Ual wondered at what point he
might need to play the data in his belt to his audience. Ralassi had
collated archive material on Eqbas Vorhi for him, a little history
lesson for the Assembly.
"Minister Par Paral Ual has been summoned to explain
the current situation," said the Arbiter wearily. "Let him be heard,
will you?"
The chamber grew quieter. Ual could see ministerial
colleagues from other departments huddled in a group, shimmering with
resentment. Alien Affairs had always been regarded as a junior post, a
do-nothing backwater keeping an eye on the wess'har in case they let
their defenses down on Asht, a department autonomous through
insignificance. But now the rest of the regional administration had
noticed him. Ual feared that they might ally to reshape the cabinet.
For a moment he longed for the human solution of a
single executive leader. But Eddie had told him that didn't do a thing
to stop infighting and alliances; it just created more people to stab
you in the back, a situation that Eddie
assured him seldom involved actual weapons.
"We find ourselves in a difficult position,
colleagues," said Ual. And to his utter embarrassment, the words came
out in the human's English, shaped by sucked air.
The chamber really was silent now.
He gathered his composure and repeated himself in his
own language. "These are challenging times. The wess'har have summoned
aid from Eqbas Vorhi to deal with the humans, and if we're not prudent
they'll deal with us too. We've never faced anything like this. We need
to consider radically different solutions."
"Is it true that the wess'har planted a pathogen on
Asht to stop us returning?" The question came from a location delegate
he didn't recognize. Full assembly sessions mixed the representatives
of neighborhoods with regional overseers and ministries, and they all
had a vote. "What are you going to do about that?"
"Absolutely nothing," said Ual. "It's not an immediate
problem."
"And why did they do it now? They've had generations to
do it."
"Perhaps they couldn't, until now," said another
delegate. "Perhaps the humans helped them. And what about Thetis?
What will happen to our colleagues on
board?"
Ual had a sudden nagging thought and dismissed it. Why
now, indeed? He pressed on. "The humans are also subject to biological
countermeasures on Bezer'ej." He paused and corrected himself. Preserve
me, I actually called it Bezer'ej. "My
apologies. Asht. It's fully quarantined."
"It didn't save the bezeri. At least any damage we
caused in the past wasn't deliberate."
"Order!" shouted the Arbiter. "If you don't comply with
the rules of this chamber I'll close the session. Let the minister
speak."
There was a disgruntled scraping of limbs across
polished stone but the delegates shut up. Ual pondered the wess'har
reputation for bioengineering skills. The ussissi said they came from a
world of naturally changing genomes: they knew a great deal about the
fabric of life as well as the manipulation of molecules. He would worry
about that later.
He made another attempt. "Unfortunately our human
allies have placed us in an impossible situation, and I'm led to
question what benefit they are to us."
"Hand over the individuals responsible for the attack
on Asht."
"The wess'har haven't asked for them yet. Do you want
me to deliver them?"
"If need be, yes. That is how their minds work. They
decide who's responsible and take only them."
"And how would you define responsible?
And what constitutes responsible to an
Eqbas wess'har? Do you understand their framework of ethical logic?
They don't invade. They will, however, intervene when asked, and they
intervene robustly and then they never stop
intervening and they create yet another enclave of their own culture."
Eit, the supplies minister, cut in. "We've asked for
wess'har troops to face our justice for the destruction of Mjat for
generations. Aras Sar Iussan lives in F'nar and as long as he does I
say we should not give them the two prisoners they will demand."
"I sympathize," said Ual. "But if we don't comply, we
give the wess'har a reason to take action against us, something they
will find a great deal easier with the assistance of Eqbas Vorhi." Now
he took the biggest risk of his political career. He felt for the data
cube and readied himself to place it in the slot to project images for
his colleagues' education. "If we surrender to our past then we lose a
greater opportunity for the future. Rather than pursue a symbolic feud
with the wess'har, I think we might be better off negotiating with them
to secure their help--the help we once thought we might get from
humans."
"And we invited the humans
here," said a surly voice to Ual's left. "The rest of Umeh won't
forgive us for that. It's made us a potential battlefield. Throw them
all out--now."
Eit interrupted. "If you're suggesting a course of
action, you're not making it clear." He lobbed a small polished stone
in the direction of the voice. There was a loud ping.
"Expand, Minister Ual."
Ual felt he was sliding into a pit, a deep one dug for
him by Eit. But he felt strongly and--as always--that overrode his
suspicion that Eit was luring him into making a rash statement. He
almost certainly was: but it still had to be said.
"Observe," said Ual.
The images that appeared around the walls for the
delegates to watch were old, very old.
They were navigation aids that the ussissi pilots once used, pictures
of approaches to landing areas and locations of ussissi settlements
where they could find accommodation. Some showed fine, wide rivers,
others mountains, others plains and icy tundra, exotic images for the
city-bound isenj. The worlds looked largely wild and unspoiled.
And in each picture, discreet and almost unnoticeable
unless you searched for it, was a building or two in a curious sinuous
style like a fungal growth, almost blended into the landscape.
"There are nearly twenty separate images here," said
Ual. "And each is of a different world that was once heavily populated.
All have been visited and subdued by forces from Eqbas Vorhi over the
millennia. If you want to study the various reasons why they intervened
in each place, I have more history archives. But perhaps all you need
to know now is this. They arrive, they remake the world into what they
see as its natural ideal, and they stay. They create outposts. They police,
to use the human word. And they adapt to each environment."
The chamber was silent. Ual felt he had made his point.
The same silence had descended on him when he viewed the images alone
in his offices.
"Are you saying they might do that to Umeh?" asked Eit.
"I am."
"And the humans?"
"I think it inevitable, judging by this, that they
won't escape correction either."
Ual let the delegates chew over the implications. The
unexpected images were a stroke of theater that Eddie had taught him
without realizing. Sometimes you had to make your point any way you
could.
"Humans are no longer a beneficial ally," said Ual.
"But they still want the instant communications
systems."
"Yes, but they have nothing to give us, except the
return of our diplomatic delegation from Thetis.
Perhaps we should seek different alliances and re-examine all those
things we thought were fundamental to our culture. What matters is that
we resolve our population and environmental problems on this planet and
Tasir Var. Everything else is negotiable."
It was so quiet he could have heard a bead drop from a
quill. He waited for one lobbed in protest to hit him. He waited for
someone to demand that they fight the Eqbas if they tried to
rehabilitate Umeh to their own taste.
But he knew what they were thinking. He decided to say
it for them.
"We have never defeated the wess'har and I'm certain
the Eqbas will ensure we have no chance of ever doing so." He paused,
seeing Eit's quills beginning to lift. "Perhaps they
might be the allies we need. Better that we negotiate a lasting
settlement than live in fear. You've seen evidence that the wess'har can
save Umeh."
But at what price? Nobody
asked. It was silent.
Then the chamber erupted. Ual never got the chance to
say which part of the wess'har civilization he suggested they approach
first. The fact that squabbling had broken out--a rare breach of
self-control for a race used to tolerating each other in crowded
conditions--suggested some of the delegates agreed with him.
He stepped down from the podium and didn't wait for the
vote. As he left, a hail of small stone beads, some red, some blue,
some green, bounced off him with angry pings
as some delegates showed their disapproval.
It would mean a very different way of life, a
terrifying prospect for a species that knew its past intimately and
lived with generations of memories every second. But Umeh needed an
environmental solution. And the prospect of expansion off-world now
seemed impossible.
Whether the vote went with him or not, he was going to
talk with the wess'har. He would surrender himself to chance as an act
of good faith. Umeh had been mired too long in fretting over the
Destroyer of Mjat and other historical wounds. Ual felt the beads under
his footpads, sharp and treacherous.
Beads.
He didn't want to, but he thought of a red corundum
bead he had given a curious Eddie Michallat, one still attached to a
shed quill. It wasn't the only access the human might have had to isenj
tissue. But Eddie was the only human he knew with direct contact with
the wess'har.
Exactly what I might have done
in his position. But he was still shocked by how deeply betrayed
he felt by a creature he thought of as a friend. Did
I misjudge humans that badly?
Betrayer or not, though, Eddie Michallat had saved him
from being forced into a course of action that could end only in
another lost war on Bezer'ej.
Ual swallowed his discomfort and thought of Umeh's
future.
Well, we've still
got incoming broadcast--only five channels, but one of them is sports
so
we can follow the footie. You'd be amazed how sane that keeps you. Our
food situation isn't much better than yours, mate, but at least I
haven't got people singing hymns next door at six in the morning. Is
Ade okay? Next time Eddie comes to Umeh, I hope he brings him. I want
to see Lindsay Neville's face when he walks in.
Message from Mne Mart Barencoin to Mne
Ismat Qureshi
"You haven't lost your touch for stirring
up shit," said Mick, the duty news editor, not looking up from his
sandwich. Then he glanced up at the cam, and he simply said, "Oh…"
Eddie was making use of one of the comms screens in the
Exchange of Surplus Things. Every conversation was effectively a live
outside broadcast surrounded by curious wess'har, and he forgot that
Mick hadn't seen the wall-sized image of Surang before.
"Where the fuck have you
been?" said Eddie.
There was a five-second delay on the last leg of the
relay, the router that joined the ITX to light-speed links near Earth.
Mick's gaze was aimed past him. "What's that behind you?"
"That's a live feed from Eqbas Vorhi. Look, I thought
I'd been cut off for good. I haven't had an incoming call from you for weeks."
Eddie glanced over his shoulder,
counting to five again. He hadn't quite worked out the technology yet,
but the images moved in the wall itself as if the very stone was
changing color and shifting, perfect from any angle. It was one of the
many things in wess'har technology that could have earned a fortune if
they were a commercially minded people. "So?"
"What's Eqbas Vorhi?"
Mick didn't appear to recognize the name. Either the
FEU didn't know about the Eqbas, or they weren't saying. The
increasingly heavy ball was back in Eddie's court. "It's another
planet." He waited for the ITX line to go dead, but it didn't. Perhaps
he wasn't being monitored, or maybe the FEU was curious too. He changed
subjects. "What's been happening?"
One, two, three, four five. "The
Defense Ministry's getting shitty about relaxing its control of
the ITX link, with or without pressure from your isenj chums. Your last
piece really caused political meltdown here, naming Rayat."
"Yeah, I can see that having an intelligence officer
nuke a neutral planet would cause some raised eyebrows."
"The opposition parties ganged up and invoked the
Information Act, so we can at least talk to you, and transmit five
channels of quality programming, twenty-four seven, for the ex-pats in
your neighborhood." Mick's mock sales-patter tone faded and his gaze
flicked slightly to one side, weary and irritated. "And good morning to
any of our FEU monitoring chums from Brussels who might be watching.
Nice to have you with us. So, hot shot, you got anything for me today
or did you just call to whinge?"
Eddie had spent too many years slipping reports past
censors in a dozen countries to be fazed by an uninvited audience. It
simply made him more combative. "I might have another piece ready later
today."
"We could do with something from Umeh Station. I
thought you and the minister were drinking buddies."
Jesus, does anyone know? Does
anyone know that the Eqbas are coming? If I tell
them, will the transmission get pulled? All Eddie's instincts
said don't let them cover this up. But he
wasn't the old Eddie whose blind priority was to get the story first.
He'd started thinking of consequences. The transmission delay only made
it worse.
"I'll try." He groped for the clumsy but effective code
he had used to tip 'Desk off before that something was amiss. "Are you
still mad at me about claiming expenses for that Conqueror stuff?"
He calculated while he waited. The FEU and BBChan
received the ITX output at exactly the same time. He could compress a
report and send it as a burst, though, and then it was a case of who
was faster on the draw. If the BBChan techs were, they could relay the
burst to individual subscribers' personal handsets and implants before
plugs were pulled and lawyers filed instant e-junctions.
And pulling the plug on a public ITX transmission would
be a very visible act, noticed by nervous governments. He had them
either way.
Is this your news to break?
Mick leaned back in his seat and winked. Good: he
understood Eddie was up to something. "You're not still trying to claim
more bogus expenses, are you, mate?"
"I'll send them over when I'm done." When? When?
"I'm sure you'll go through them with a
bloody knife."
"I'll await them with my usual interest."
Eddie closed the relay. Mick would now have techs
standing by to watch for that burst, however long it took to send it.
He didn't know what was coming, or when. And Eddie couldn't warn him.
He couldn't take the risk of being blocked.
Eddie stood with his hand in his pocket, feeling the
outline of his bee cam for a few moments, and wondering if he was doing
the right thing. It wasn't just a bloody story. He was lobbing a
grenade into Earth society.
And if you don't?
The wess'har didn't care what humans knew. And this
wasn't live. He still had time to think about it.
He took the cam out of his pocket and tossed it into
the air as he moved among the wess'har crowd watching the almost
organic skyline of Surang. The bee cam followed him and positioned
itself so he could record his piece to camera right in front of the
shimmering wall. Humans might have yelled at him to get out of the way
so they could watch the screen, but wess'har, being wess'har, simply
stared at him as an interesting addition to the spectacle.
"I'll be as quick as I can," he said, and smiled weakly
in the hope that some of them understood him and that they wouldn't
interrupt. He focused on the cam's tiny red eyeline light and exhaled
slowly.
In three…two…go.
He talked. He explained the image of Surang, and the
contact with Eqbas Vorhi, and the implications for the Cavanagh system
and for Earth. And--finally--he spoke of c'naatat,
and the truth behind the bombing of Bezer'ej, and what had happened to
a disgraced police superintendent called Shan Frankland. He shut out
the peripheral images of curious wess'har and concentrated on
revelations that would kick all other news items off the menu for at
least a day, maybe more.
Then he signed off and fell silent, holding his
position for five seconds.
Eddie knew without looking at the time code that the
piece ran at four minutes, a hefty chunk by news standards. When that
downloaded into some poor bastard's entertainment implant, it would
probably make them shit themselves.
Eddie beckoned the bee cam back to him and slipped it
into the breast pocket of his shirt. The wess'har parted to let him
pass and carried on sorting vegetables and glancing at the image of
Surang.
"Why did you tell them?" said a voice from waist
height, and he looked down.
It was Giyadas. She studied him, head tilted.
"I haven't, yet," said Eddie. "But my government either
doesn't know the Eqbas are here, or they haven't told anybody else. One
or the other."
"Isan says they can't do
anything about us anyway." So isan meant
"mother" as well as "wife." Boss-woman.
"Eqbas Vorhi will go to Earth and deal with the gethes.
It makes no difference whether they know or not."
Giyadas reached up and took Eddie's hand like a regular
human kid. They walked slowly to a corner of the vaulted hall and sat
down on a couple of crates.
"Let me ask you a question, sweetheart," said Eddie. "Is there
anything the gethes could do
that would make you all change your minds about going to Earth and
sorting us out?"
Giyadas considered the idea with much dilation and
snapping of her cross-shaped pupils. Oh, God,
thought Eddie. I'm making the decision of my life
by discussing politics with a child. I'll be plunging Earth into panic
on the strength of a kid's analysis.
"No," she said at last. "How could you change enough to
be acceptable?"
"Not all humans are bad. Shan wasn't bad. What if
acceptable humans ran the planet?"
Giyadas made a little rumble in her throat. "Why don't
they run your planet now?"
Sometimes it took a child to remind you what reality
actually meant.
I can't sit on this.
If he dithered much longer, the situation might shift.
The ITX might not be available. He took a deep breath and pulled out
the bee cam.
"Let's see what happens," said Eddie, and put the cam
back in his pocket.
Ual sat on the polished stone dais in his
office and drew comfort from the silence for a while. There was a
skittering sound from the corridor. Ralassi was coming.
The ussissi stood staring at him as if awaiting a
reaction.
"You missed the vote in the chamber," he said, all
disapproval.
"Well, then?"
"The decision is to demand the return of Aras Sar
Iussan in exchange for the two humans."
"So we launch the war of
demands, do we?"
"You risk your office by even hinting at surrender to
the wess'har."
"My office," said Ual, "might well be rubble if we do
not. And surrender is somewhat of an overstatement."
"Shall I make contact with Nevyan Tan Mestin?"
Ual shook himself a little and considered the rattle of
his blue corundum beads. "I shall do that myself. We both speak the
humans' language. Isn't that ironic? The source of our dispute has also
enabled us to talk to each other directly for the first time in our
history."
If Ralassi was disturbed by the thought of losing his
usefulness as an interpreter, he didn't show it. Ussissi didn't care.
He would come and go as Serrimissani had once done, a reliable helper
but ultimately answerable to nobody but his own kind.
Ual looked at the screen. He needed to choose his words
carefully. Eddie Michallat would have found the words: the journalist
had a curious gift for speaking in such a way that those who heard him
could derive two entirely different meanings from what he said. It was
part of the nature of English, but it was also the skill of timing and
emphasis. Eddie called it weasel-speak and
Ual wondered if he might one day learn it from a weasel, whatever that
might be.
Ual's console showed him the ITX relay status, but he
wasn't sure where the outgoing channel would connect. The image in
front of him changed from a diagnostics screen to a large chamber
filled with wess'har.
Ual hadn't seen so many at one time. In fact, he had
never had contact with one at all. They were extraordinary, long and
narrow, and two-legged.
"I am Par Paral Ual," he said in English. "I wish to
speak to Nevyan Tan Mestin."
Staring into the clustered wess'har faces, he wondered
if any of them understood English. Perhaps he needed to call back
Ralassi after all. He waited: they knew what an isenj looked like and
that, he hoped, would be enough for them to fetch an appropriate
matriarch.
They were still staring at him, huddled together and
making musical noises. Then the little knot parted and a much taller
wess'har with a plume of soft fur on its head--not unlike a
human's--stepped into the foreground.
"Minister Ual," it said. "I am Nevyan Tan Mestin."
A thought that had just been an outrageous idea when he
was speaking in the chamber now had seconds to become a sensible plan.
Others in Jejeno would be listening and he was not the only minister
who had access to English-speaking ussissi--or humans, come to that.
This called for very delicate phrasing.
"Matriarch," he said. "My government wants me to ask
for the return of someone they regard as a criminal."
"As do we. You will now hand over Lindsay Neville and
Mohan Rayat, and we will not give you Aras
Sar Iussan."
Perhaps he should have asked for Eddie. The subtle
distancing of himself from his government's request had not put her in
the frame of mind he thought it might. He steeled himself against
erecting his quills, not because he feared revealing that he felt
defensive but because he suspected it might appear aggressive. "I
understand. May I ask if you would be prepared to send Eddie Michallat
to discuss this with me?"
Nevyan paused. "Why? What is there to discuss?"
"My English is far from perfect." No,
it's quite excellent. I'm proud of it. "Eddie will be able to
interpret some of the more ambiguous terminology. In fact, I'm anxious
that he should. I wouldn't like any misunderstanding of my intent." He
leaned a little on the my. "I promise you
that we will be able to reach a solution."
Nevyan said nothing. Wess'har had eyes, like humans
did, large wet voids in their skins. It was most unnerving to see them
flicker and alter shape.
"One way or another," she said, "the bezeri will have
justice. I'll send Eddie Michallat."
"I greatly respect this gesture." The image faded. Ual
shivered involuntarily and let his quills spring up for a few moments.
He turned. Ralassi was at the doorway.
"That was not exactly the unequivocal demand that Eit
suggested you make," he said.
"I was not present to hear Eit's exact wording," said
Ual, luxuriating in his new-found skill of speaking weasel.
"How can you believe wess'har will negotiate? It's not
in their nature."
"Then why did we ask for the Destroyer of Mjat in the
first place? Did we think we could take him by force? We tried, if you
recall. The definition of stupidity is doing the same thing again and
expecting a different outcome."
Ralassi made a long hiss like escaping steam. "A valid
point."
Ual wondered how transparent his plans were. Deception
was a human behavior trait; and while he wasn't entirely sure how to go
about lying or what use it would be, he had discovered omission.
Genetic memory was a source of strength, stability and
wisdom. It was also a mechanism for becoming hidebound. Ual would have
traded it in an instant for the ability to see the future rather than
the past.
It's time to break the pattern.
Forget national pride, forget feuds. Think about the future.
He was going to defy the Northern Assembly. And he was
going to ask Eddie Michallat to help him do it.
Eddie adjusted the straps that secured him to
the bulkhead of the transport and concentrated on the footage playing
back on the editing screen spread on his lap. Giyadas's earnest little
seahorse face bobbed and tilted in shot, repeating simple wess'u
phrases for his benefit. It was sobering to learn a language from a
child, but not as humbling as her lessons in politics.
"What are you doing?" asked the ussissi pilot.
"Learning wess'u," said Eddie.
"Fool," said the pilot.
Eddie rolled up the screen and put it back in his
pocket.
The pilot's contempt--not unkindly meant, just
stating the obvious--made him more determined.
"How civilized that wess'har and isenj can operate
vessels between each other's space without starting a war," said Eddie.
"We operate their civilian ships," said the pilot. "And
none of us take kindly to being shot at."
"Well, that's one way of achieving peace."
"Both races need us in their way. Yes, there is a
certain stability in necessity."
"Nothing like a strong trade union, eh, comrade?"
The pilot didn't answer. Eddie practiced the wess'u
overtones for hours at a time, hand on one ear as he sang a single
note, listening hard for the different harmonics within it like a
Siberian khoomei singer. Occasionally it split into two notes and he
felt it in his throat and skull, and it was weirdly exciting. He was
still making quite a reasonable resonant aaaaaaahhhhhhhh
when the shuttle landed at Jejeno.
"If you do that on the return run I shall bring you
back here and you will wait for the next scheduled transport," said the
pilot. "Employ an interpreter like everyone else."
"Have a nice day," said Eddie.
Ual spoke English. He spoke very good English indeed
even though he had no true lips or pharynx. He modified the airflow
through his throat as if he had been given a crude laryngectomy. He sat
on the aquamarine stone dais in his spacious chambers like a black
porcupine Buddha, legs folded round him, piranha mouth open in an
approximation of a human smile.
"It's very good to see you," said Ual. He had no
visible eyes either. "How unfortunate that times are so tense."
"You haven't booted all of us off your planet, then,"
said Eddie, sitting on the black slab opposite. Outside the window,
hundreds of thousands of isenj flowed up and down the streets like a
single shoal of fish. "I'd have gift-wrapped Lindsay and Rayat and left
them on Nevyan's doorstep without being asked."
"Where might we boot you?"
asked Ual. "Wess'ej?"
"We still have a ship inbound. Hereward.
They could evacuate."
"You still have a ship Earth-bound. Thetis.
With isenj delegates on board. Both are
many years from their destination, if either ever reach it."
Eddie tried to divine the real message. Wess'har were
literal: they said what they thought and they meant what they said.
Their language was precise--so Serrimissani said--and there were no
double meanings or euphemism. Isenj were a little more like humans.
They liked playing with words even if they hadn't progressed to
outright, blatant dishonesty. And that was why he was here.
An isenj aide skittered into the room with a tray and
Eddie found himself flinching. Oh, God. Spider.
He was hardwired to react to that movement. He tried to see Lij as a
person.
"Thank you, Lij," said Ual. "Mr. Michallat, I have
acquired tea for you."
"That's very kind." Lij backed out of the room and
Eddie's peripheral vision tracked the creature involuntarily.
"Minister, I'm happy to see you again, but given the situation I'd like
to think I was helping the situation rather than just boosting viewing
figures."
"A war twenty-five years away is fiction for your
people. It doesn't affect them now and they have no loved ones fighting
in it. We, however, are a maximum of five years from the reach of Eqbas
Vorhi."
"So you know they're coming. What are you going to do
when they show up?"
Ual shimmered and rattled like a chandelier in an
earthquake. His many quills were decorated with rough-tumbled sapphire
beads. They bothered Eddie, and not just because reporters dreaded
rattling things that interfered with a cam's mike. They plagued him
because they reminded him of a shed quill he had pocketed for the
wess'har so they could have isenj DNA to create the biodeterrent on
Bezer'ej.
He wasn't proud of doing it. If that was how Mohan
Rayat had to live his life, then Eddie pitied him.
"You don't have your camera, Mr. Michallat."
Eddie shrugged. "It's in my pocket."
"Then we are having an informal discussion."
"Yes. Just a discussion."
"Thanks to your news channel, I am aware that Earth is
no more united in its approach than we are."
"Most governments are now demanding direct access to
the wess'har. Years ago we all agreed that we'd share first contacts
with aliens, but that was when we didn't think it would actually
happen."
"Extraordinary how simple communication conduits shape
worlds."
"You understand what's happening at the Earth end?"
"That your own government is in what you call a cleft
stick." Ual's command of English never ceased to surprise Eddie. "If
you prevent access to us, the other nations will turn against you. If
you open up the ITX link, then you lose control of the situation--such
control as you have at such a vast distance, of course."
"This all hinges on how other Earth governments show
their disapproval. It might be trade sanctions, which won't make much
of a dent on a territory the size of the FEU. Or it might be armed
conflict, and that's a different kettle of fish."
"I shall remember that phrase. And who might be able to
take on such a federation?"
"The Sinostates and Africa are strong enough. Africa's
been making the most noise."
"I noted that."
"Then there's the Pacific Rim States. They're vocal but
they're small. The Americas don't play much these days. But Canada
might back the FEU if it decides it wants an excuse for more American
territory. They've really developed a taste for warmer weather." Eddie
scratched the bridge of his nose. "It all depends how they gang up. We
love a good family brawl."
Ual made a gargling noise. It might have been
amusement. "But this would have less to do with our dilemma here than
the opportunity to change the balance of power at home."
"How well you know us." Eddie decided to try the tea.
Without milk--even soy milk--it was mouth-puckeringly tannic. Given the
state of supplies in Jejeno it was a generous gesture. "But don't
forget there's plenty of people who really oppose what we did here.
It's just that they're not high in the global pecking order."
"Do politicians think so many years ahead?"
"They think in days."
Eddie took another gulp of tea. Now here's the
big one. "Have you told the FEU that the Eqbas are coming?"
"Yes."
"Ah." Devious bastards: they were
sitting on it after all. He had to send that report now. The thought
almost diverted him. "How did they take it?"
"They thanked me for the intelligence."
Ual sipped something from his cup, wafting a faint
aroma of something yeasty and savory. Eddie could hear his own pulse
pounding in his ears as he raised the bowl of tea to his lips: the
sound of his own swallowing was deafening. He'd fallen off the
tightrope at last. He'd wobbled a few times, tilting between observer
and player, but he had always felt he could regain his balance.
Now he'd lost it for good. The next question was going
to demand an answer that was tantamount to political advice. It
wouldn't make much difference to Earth, but it might make a huge
difference to Umeh.
"Okay, we've done the dance," said Eddie. "Now what do
you want me to say to Nevyan? You must know that they're never going to
hand over Aras."
"I know the wess'har mean what they say."
"What, then? What do you want?"
"I want you to talk to the Royal Marines at Umeh
Station."
Eddie tried not to jump too far ahead. You couldn't
second-guess aliens. It was all too easy to listen to Ual and think he
was human, and then misjudge him totally. "About what?"
"I would like them to do a job for me."
"Interesting."
"I wonder if they would be willing to arrest--that's the
word, isn't it, arrest?--Commander Neville and Dr. Rayat."
"You're going to put them on trial?"
"No, I intend to take them to F'nar and hand them over
to Nevyan Tan Mestin, and I won't be expecting an exchange of
prisoners. That's what your marines do well, isn't it? They captured
Frankland. They can certainly take these two."
Eddie never knew if he was being observed covertly or
not. That usually didn't matter: there was a silly kid at the heart of
every journalist who got a buzz out of thinking they were dangerous
enough to be spied upon. But it mattered now, because Eddie knew he had
slipped well out of the neutral zone and into representing the
interests of Wess'ej.
"This isn't what your cabinet colleagues have agreed
to, is it?"
"No, Eddie. This is my decision and I don't have the
authority to make it, but make it I have. You see my reasoning here."
"You're putting your hands up. A white flag."
"I think I understand that. Yes. It is, I suppose, a
surrender."
Holy shit. Ual was doing
a Mossad. He was going to kidnap a target and sort things out via the
back door. Eddie thought for a second that there might be a trap laid
for him here, but he considered the world from an isenj point of view,
and it looked terrifying enough to explain rash measures.
"We expected Umeh Station to be destroyed in
retaliation," said Ual. "And I still believe that even if Wess'ej
doesn't exact some retribution, then Eqbas Vorhi will. Ask the
ussissi." He held out a stick-thin arm and offered Eddie a cube of what
looked like gray rubber. "Do you have the means to play back this data?"
"I doubt it. What is it?"
"A little summary of Eqbas activity over the last few
thousand years." Ual turned on his dais and called out. "Lij? Lij,
fetch me a data player, please. Mr. Michallat needs one."
Eddie was distracted by the promise of new information
from the data cube. The history of the World Before seemed more urgent
now. He still found their cultural attitudes to information totally
confusing, because while no race--wess'har, isenj, or ussissi--made any
effort to conceal information, neither did they go to any lengths to
share it. The ussissi confused him most of all. They traveled between
the various worlds but they seemed not to put information at a premium.
Perhaps only humans thought knowledge was power. Maybe
he was seeing the universe through a journalist's eyes, where
information was more than simple currency: it was life itself.
He finished his tea and got up to stare out of the
window onto the streets below. Lij crept in like a spider, clutching a
small box.
Eddie couldn't see any pavement in the road beneath.
All he saw was isenj, close-packed and moving at a steady rate like
flowing liquid. He wanted to walk among them again, but he recalled the
last time he had done that and been swept up helplessly in the current
of bodies. He could see the dome of Umeh Station from here. It was
within walking distance.
"Your government is going to go ballistic when they
find you've given away their bargaining chip."
"But you and I know there is no bargain to be struck
here." Ual made that chandelier sound and Eddie didn't look round.
"This world is a high price to pay for one ancient soldier. It's time
we moved on."
"Humans don't, if that's any comfort. And we haven't
even got genetic memory to keep our feuds alive. We've really got to
work at it."
"Will you help me? If I walk in to Umeh Station and ask
for a Royal Marine, I fear my plans will quickly become
public--especially if they refuse."
"I could ask Nevyan," said Eddie. "But we don't know
who'll be listening on the ITX, do we? Leave it to me."
"Thank you."
Eddie felt a pang of guilt about the use he had made of
Ual's shed quill. But at least he now knew that isenj too could play
double games, and he had purged his guilt a little. "If they agree to
this, how are they going to make contact with you?"
"I'll visit the base, as I have before. Culturally,
we're poor at covert behavior, so the shorter the communications chain,
the better."
"You'd fit right in on Earth," said Eddie.
Things had certainly moved on at Umeh Station.
As Eddie stepped through the airlock and took off his
breather mask, he was struck by the progress in completing the
accommodation sections. He also noticed the tropical temperature.
"Lots more bodies than this place was designed for,"
said the harassed site foreman. "We're working on it. Who you looking
for, then?"
"The marines," said Eddie. "Ex-marines, rather."
"Probably on the building site in the accommodation
section. Big strong boys. Even the girl."
Eddie had never thought of Sue Webster quite that way
but she was engineer-trained and good at rigging water supplies. That
probably required a bit of muscle. He didn't know what Jon Becken's
non-combat specialty was, but he suspected Mart Barencoin's wasn't
construction.
"I always knew you'd make a good brickie's mate," said
Eddie.
Becken looked down from the top of an accommodation
cube with a length of conduit in one hand like a spear, an archetypal
tribal warrior in an incongruous T-shirt that read Fly
Crab Air.
"I'd offer you a beer," he said. "But we're on
rationing."
"How's things?"
"Piss poor as usual." Becken swung himself down from
the roof, getting a foothold on a doorframe. Ladders were clearly for
wimps. "I'll find Mart and Sue. Is Ade with you?"
"He's a bit busy on Wess'ej."
It seemed Qureshi and Chahal hadn't shared the news of
Ade's awkward condition. Maybe they thought that the fewer people who
knew, the better. Eddie looked around.
"Ma'am is in the office," said Becken, shaping ma'am
into an expression of obvious contempt.
"Yeah, I do have to talk to her some time."
"So you've not had any contact with her since she
kicked off War of the Worlds, have you?"
"No." This was too public a place to discuss Ual's
proposal. "Can I have a word with you and the others?"
Becken wiped the palms of his hands on his backside. "Interview?"
"No, a conversation. Private. Has anyone mentioned
Eqbas Vorhi to you?"
"If that's what the ussissi call the World Before, yes."
"Want to do a bit of peacekeeping?"
Becken adopted a carefully blank expression, the sort
Eddie read as a strong desire not to react. "Let's find Mart and Sue,
shall we?"
Barencoin and Webster were fiddling with a water pump.
Webster's rosy, scrubbed face and buxom frame made her look like a
paramilitary milkmaid.
"Eddie's got a dodgy proposal for us," said Becken.
Am I that obvious? "You
might be able to do something really useful."
Barencoin exchanged glances with Webster and Becken. "We're pretty
useful here."
"Do you know that the isenj are talking about
exchanging Lin and Rayat for Aras?"
"I'm glad I wasn't holding anything fragile when you
said that."
"Don't take the piss. Are you up for solving a problem
and saving a lot of shooting?"
"Depends. We've been kicked out of the Corps, in case
you hadn't realized. Sue and Jon weren't even involved. Bastards."
Eddie hoped he had read Barencoin correctly as a man
who nursed his grudges like babies. "Elements in the isenj
administration want to hand over our two colleagues and forget about
Aras, just as a goodwill gesture."
"They're shitting themselves about what's coming over
the hill, aren't they?"
"House-bricks, mate."
"Okay, as long as we don't get shafted again, we'll do
it for free. Compliments of the Corps."
"Really?"
"You thought we'd refuse?"
"You haven't asked me or Jon," said Webster, a little
steel glinting through her bucolic veneer.
"Okay," said Barencoin. "Hands up everyone who wants to
defend hysterical bezeri-killer Neville and slimy spook Rayat and watch
the wess'har turn this place into charcoal. Nobody? Well, carried
unanimously. Let's get to it."
Webster gave him a weary look and stood a little closer
to Eddie. "I think you'll find anyone in
this place would gladly turn them in. Why the secrecy?"
"Because the isenj won't let Lin and Rayat off the
planet unless they get Aras. Ual's being a very naughty spider."
"You trust him?"
"More than I trust the FEU. It's his arse that's in the
firing line."
"And then what happens to us?"
Eddie paused. He was way out of his depth, but Aras had
said Ade's comrades were welcome to join him. That was permission
enough. "You can stay on Wess'ej."
"At least we'd all be together," said Jon.
Barencoin wasn't giving up. Eddie thought that if he'd
been shanghaied by his masters, he'd be wary too. "And are they
treating Ade okay? Why's he separated from Izzy and Chaz?"
Barencoin showed no sign of knowing that Ade had c'naatat,
even though he had been with him when
Shan was captured. Eddie, surprised that Lindsay had kept her mouth
shut this long, skimmed the surface of a lie. "He's fine. They're just
keeping him in F'nar with Aras for a while. I promise you he's okay." Shit,
I'm losing this. "Look, are you going to
do the fucking job or not?"
Barencoin was no more a fool than Ade was. Eddie
wondered why the FEU didn't just dispense with officers and let the
enlisted troops run the show. They'd have made a better job of it.
"You're not telling me something," he said.
"Ade's in a bit of a state about Shan." Well, that
wasn't even a lie. It was simply a fragment of reality from which you
couldn't identify the rest of the picture. "Yes or no?"
"Yes."
"I'll let Ual know, then, and he'll contact you when
he's ready to roll." He gave them a shrug. He didn't know what else to
say. Shit, what did you say when you'd
just trampled over the democratic will of a nation? This didn't feel at
all like the game back home. "I ought to see Lindsay now. I have to do
it sooner or later."
Eddie stood outside the site office for a full minute.
He'd doorstepped everyone in his time. He'd banged on the doors of
gangland bosses and disgraced government ministers; he'd thrust a cam
in the faces of parents and asked how it felt to know that their
child's body had been found. He believed that after twenty years in the
game, there was nothing that could raise his pulse rate or dry his
mouth.
He was wrong. His stomach churned.
Lindsay Neville weighed just fifty kilos, a woman
emotionally wrecked by the death of her baby, a moderate and mediocre
naval officer. She'd been a friend. But he was scared. This wasn't an
interview; it was a rebuke. What did you say to an old friend who had
personally deployed nuclear weapons when there was no war to fight?
"Hello, Lindsay," said Eddie.
She rested her forehead on one hand while she scribbled
on a pad. She wasn't thirty yet but she could have passed for a lot
older. Events had taken their toll. "Hi, Eddie. Slumming it?"
Well, that sets the tone. "Working."
"I've seen. Exclusive from the Cavanagh system. It's
made your career."
"Oh, didn't it meet with your approval?"
She laid the stylus down with exaggerated care and
meshed her hands in front of her.
"Why didn't you say why we
did it? Why didn't you mention what we had to destroy?"
"Because immortality tends to knock murdered squid off
the news agenda, Lin. They had to concentrate their minds on that
first. And nobody can hurt Shan any more. Trust me, I'm running the
story. Soon."
"What was it you said? It isn't what's true that
counts, it's who gets their story in first."
"I know this is going to sound harsh, but if you nuke a
neutral planet you've got to expect some criticism."
"I didn't bloody well know that Rayat had salted the
warheads with cobalt."
"Silly me. Of course. There's nothing wrong with
detonating ordinary high-yield neutron devices. It's adding a side
order of cobalt that makes them bad."
Lindsay's pupils were wide and black. Just above her
neat collar her throat was flushed. "In the last couple of months I've
heard every variation of that line you can imagine. I can't change
what happened. If I could rerun
time I'd still destroy that parasite but I'd do it differently. Do you
think your smart-arse armchair analysis can make me feel any worse than
I do? I'm at rock bottom now. I've got nothing left to lose. Now sod
off."
He had to ask. It was a reflex. "Do you want to talk
about it on camera and put the record straight?"
"It's too late for that. Ask Rayat."
Eddie turned to go. It was amazing how little you could
know about someone even after you'd lived in their pocket for nearly
two years. There were now fewer than ten people alive in his entire
world that he knew well enough to count as friends and he'd just lost
one more.
"I have to ask you this, Lin. Shan really did die the
way Ade said, didn't she?"
The anger that sealed Lindsay's expression crumbled for
a brief moment into something that looked like real regret.
"Yeah," she said quietly. "She just stepped out the
airlock. A real Titus Oates job." She started writing again, ticking
items off a list. He imagined it was some rota or other: she always
found comfort in order. "When are they coming for me, Eddie?"
"I don't know." He felt his plans were tattooed on his
forehead for all to read. He concentrated on reducing his blink rate
but it was very, very hard. "But they're not going to forgive and
forget, are they?"
"I know that. Just tell them when they do to make sure
they take Rayat as well. I won't carry the can for this alone."
Eddie reminded himself there was no reason for him to
feel guilty; he wasn't the fool who'd wiped out a fragile species. But
Lindsay really did seem to think that it was the act of salting the
devices with cobalt that had catapulted the event from essential asset
denial to an act of war. She couldn't see that any
destruction on Bezer'ej would have provoked the wess'har to retaliate.
And the FEU hadn't told anyone else that it had
attracted the attention of a massively powerful military civilization.
What did these people use for brains?
His priority now was to get to an ITX relay and send
that bloody report, something he should have done there and then. Sod
it. The transport back to the shuttle was
waiting for him at the entrance along with Ralassi.
"You have a message for the minister. Yes or no?"
"Yes," said Eddie.
Ralassi said nothing else. He showed no sign of knowing
what Eddie's business had been about, but ussissi didn't get involved.
They oiled the wheels, that was all. The ussissi pilot who hurried him
into his seat on the shuttle seemed equally devoid of curiosity.
"You have a message," he said.
"I need an ITX link out, first," said Eddie. "Can I use
the ship's system?"
The pilot fixed him with a disapproving slitted stare. "Now?"
"Now. Please. I need to
transmit to my news desk."
The pilot handed Eddie a wess'har virin,
a soft translucent hand-sized device that could have passed for a bar
of glycerin soap had it not fired up with lights and images when the
pilot squeezed it into life. Eddie struggled to find the right sequence
of finger positions to activate the interface with his cam.
"Like this," said the pilot irritably, and took the cam
and the virin from him. The ussissi
squeezed the device and the news of Eqbas Vorhi and c'naatat
instantly, silently, reached the relay
close to Earth, and--one, two, three--it
arrived at the BBChan router. Nothing visible had taken place. It was a
strange way to make history.
"Well, that's going to get the shit flying," Eddie
muttered.
The pilot peered at the virin
and handed it back to him. "And now will you take your message? You
have a message here from Nevyan Tan Mestin."
"Read it for me."
"She says it is urgent and personal."
I've just filed a bombshell.
Shut up. "Read it to me anyway."
The pilot settled in his seat and placed the virin
back in its housing on the console. He
made irritated chattering noises.
"I said go ahead."
The pilot hissed.
"She thought you needed to know they have located a
body."
We strongly
suggest that you allow all governments access to the ITX system. It
will aid you in defusing the tension between the FEU and other states.
Your priority is surely both to be assured of the welfare of your
citizens on Wess'ej and Umeh, and to keep open a potential diplomatic
channel between yourselves and the wess'har; and we wish to be
reassured of the welfare of our colleagues en route to Earth in Thetis.
We assume you understand the significance of the entry of Eqbas Vorhi
into the situation.
MINISTER
PAR PARAL
UAL,
Northern Assembly,
to Birsen Ertegun
A halo of shimmering hot air formed around
the Eqbas patrol ship as it slowed and eased itself down on the plain
north of F'nar. It was the worst possible time it could have chosen to
arrive.
Nevyan was anxious to leave. Time would make no
difference to Shan any more, but she had no intention of leaving her
body drifting in space for a moment longer. And she had no choice. The
first of the Eqbas ships had arrived.
"Are you worried, ma'am?" asked Ade Bennett. He stood
to one side of her. She knew he hoped to accompany her to recover the
body, but she had made her position clear. "Historical moment, isn't
it?"
"I'm anxious," she said. "Our ancestors left this way
of life behind. I've changed everything by summoning them here."
"Needs must," said Ade, but she didn't understand him.
The ship was a smooth bronze cylinder tapered at both
ends. A band of brilliant red and blue illuminated chevrons danced
horizontally along each side. Dust rose beneath the hull. It was
remarkably quiet but very, very visible.
Nevyan clutched her dhren
to her throat. Serrimissani, ready to interpret, showed displeasure
with half-closed eyes and arms straight at her sides.
Ade frowned. "They don't believe in stealth, do they?
You're really going to notice that
patrolling your airspace."
"I doubt anyone has countermeasures to trouble the
World Before."
The hatches opened with a long hiss and several ussissi
came out sniffing the air. They stood perfectly synchronized, heads
bobbing in unison, and then went back inside. Serrimissani began
trotting towards the ship.
Nevyan waited with Ade, hoping she would have nothing
to regret later. Serrimissani was now with one of the Eqbas ussissi,
talking to her, mirroring her movements while they talked. Serrimissani
was fluent enough to interpret without the aid of another ussissi, but
Nevyan hoped to use her own hastily acquired command of eqbas'u.
Serrimissani beckoned.
Nevyan was about twenty meters from the ship when she
saw the first Eqbas step out. She was wearing an environment suit. She
was shorter and thicker-set than Nevyan had expected, even though she
had seen their images on screen, and when she took her helmet off she
revealed no tufted mane but close-cropped brown wisps.
But it wasn't a matriarch at all. It was a male.
Nevyan could smell that now. She hadn't expected a male
to lead the vanguard.
His face was short-muzzled and light brown, and
although Nevyan could see the similarities with wess'har features, the
visitor reminded her more of a ussissi. This was a wess'har from her
origins, a world her forebears had left long ago. The branches of the
species had diverged rapidly; wess'har adapted to their environment
fast.
Nevyan shook off her suspicion. Being wess'har was
about what you did, not how you looked or what you said.
Shan had been wess'har: so was Serrimissani.
Ade and Eddie were fitting in as well. Wess'har could take many forms.
More of the crew trailed out, all male, all hesitant.
She stared.
She almost forgot Ade was behind her and stopped dead.
The Eqbas tilted his head, gaze darting between Nevyan and Ade, pupils
snapping open and shut. We must both look alien
to him. But he had familiar wess'har eyes with four lobed
pupils, not the single unnerving void of a human eye. He was kin.
"I am Nevyan Tan Mestin," she said, and waited for some
reaction. "Where is your matriarch?"
The male warbled, and although he appeared to have a
reasonable command of wess'u she had difficulty understanding him.
There was the tantalizing hint of syllables and tone chords she thought
she understood, but whole sentences were elusive and she failed to
grasp them.
Serrimissani relayed the answer in English. "He says he
is Da Shapakti, the commander of this vessel, and he has no matriarchs
on board. He asks if Ade is a gethes and
why he's here."
"Shall I thin out, ma'am?" asked Ade.
"What?"
"Would you like me to leave?"
"No. Stay and observe."
No matriarchs. Why was
this Eqbas male without his isan? Jurej've
needed constant cell renewal from their matriarch, and if this patrol
had been in space for some time then they should have been showing
signs of ill health.
Perhaps Shapakti was. Nevyan wasn't sure what a healthy
Eqbas male looked like.
"Ade is human and has made a great sacrifice for us,"
she said carefully, avoiding the word gethes.
"Why don't you have isan've on board?"
The ussissi chittered. "His isan
is on Eqbas, as are those of his colleagues. He says that if you are
asking about oursan, then they are
medicated and do not require it on patrol."
"What's oursan?" asked Ade.
Nevyan ignored him. This was unnatural. Matriarchs
always accompanied their males on long journeys and families were never
separated. She stared at Shapakti, appalled. And without a dominant
matriarch, where could she begin to discuss the complex politics of
driving back the gethes?
"When will your next ship arrive?" she asked. "One with
a matriarch in command?"
This time Shapakti's answer was intelligible. "Some
days."
She stood staring at him. His gaze still seemed torn
between her and Ade.
"Do you want to enter the city? There's accommodation
for you if you need it."
"For your sake, we stay here."
Nevyan looked to Serrimissani. "I didn't understand
that."
The two ussissi exchanged chatter. "He thinks it would
be better for both societies if each became familiar with the other
more slowly, and they respect your wish for separateness. They have
sufficient supplies."
It seemed reasonable. The Eqbas were here to make
environmental and political assessments, not to fraternize.
Understanding might come later, if at all. She acknowledged him with a
nod and turned to go back.
"You mean to walk?" said Shapakti.
"Of course I do," said Nevyan.
"A vehicle for our equipment?"
"What equipment?"
"Communications, defense assessment, bio-analysis."
He seemed to hesitate and leaned down to the ussissi.
Serrimissani listened to the exchange. "He says you have not yet
answered his question about the presence of the gethes."
Nevyan had to be certain. "Are you sure that's what he
said?"
Serrimissani lowered her head and exchanged more
high-pitched chatter with the Eqbas ussissi. Her eyes were now
disapproving slits. "Yes, chail."
Nevyan took three steps forward and cuffed Shapakti
casually around the head, just hard enough to make her point. Perhaps
he hadn't got the message that he should defer to her. He yelped; she
needed no translation. Now he knew his place.
"Tell him," said Nevyan, "that I have already explained
that Ade is our friend."
Nevyan summoned a ground transport on the virin.
She reminded herself that Eqbas was
industrialized, a world away from the carefully preserved agrarian
simplicity of Wess'ej. That was one of the reasons that her people had
followed Targassat's teachings and sought a separate life of what Eddie
called minimal ecological and political impact.
Eqbas were perhaps more like gethes
in many ways. They expected transport.
"Well, that went well," said Ade, raising his eyebrows
in that human gesture that said it definitely hadn't. "What was all
that about?"
A ground car passed them on its way to the ship. Nevyan
found she was clutching the collar of her dhren
even though the garment was self-shaping, and she made a conscious
effort to lower her hands. "I fear our cousins have a very different
social order to our own."
"Boys only, eh?"
"I don't understand."
"No isan embarked." He had
picked up some words fast. "Come on, what's oursan?"
Nevyan recalled a dead friend posing the same naive
question. She missed her and she wondered how much more she would miss
her as time progressed. "Shan called it shagging."
Ade wafted agitation as he walked. "I think this is
more than I need to know."
"It's not copulation in the sense of reproductive
activity, but as Shan said, it's as near as makes
no odds. We exchange and repair DNA during oursan.
Without it, the cells of the male deteriorate."
"Ah," said Ade.
His face was much pinker now. Nevyan had seen that
before. Embarrassment. "I didn't suggest
that it was unpleasant. Far from it. But it seems the Eqbas have medication
instead."
Ade said nothing more until they reached F'nar. Nevyan
realized it was the mention of Shan that had silenced him, because he
didn't seem the kind of human who was easily embarrassed by bodily
functions. They sat on crates with Serrimissani in the Exchange of
Surplus Things and watched the Eqbas crew--six males--set up equipment
at
the back of the hall, supervised by Serrimissani.
"Are you sure you don't want me orAras to come with
you, ma'am?" asked Ade, returning to his main preoccupation.
He didn't use the word bodies.
Shan and Vijissi were drifting in the void somewhere between Bezer'ej
and the isenj homeworld of Umeh, and Nevyan wondered if Ade ever
remembered that the ussissi aide had died with Shan rather than abandon
her. Mestin had asked him to stay at her side, no matter what.
"You have preparations to make here, Ade. We won't be
away more than a few days."
"Understood, ma'am." He paused and looked at her as if
expecting her to change her mind if he was persistent enough. His
clutched his green fabric headdress in both hands and he was twisting
it like a cleaning rag. "You said I was your friend."
"You are."
"Why? I don't understand why you don't blame me for
Shan's death. And the bezeri."
"You persist in asking this."
"It's because I don't understand."
"Even wess'har have to draw a line somewhere in the
chain of circumstances, or we would execute parents and grandparents
for a child's wrongdoings. Your superiors set the bombs. Shan chose to
die." Nevyan, broken-hearted again, inhaled sharply to smell Shan in
Ade's scent. "And I know that if she were alive now, and I went to
punish you, she would stand in my way and defend you."
Ade smoothed out his headdress and put it in his
pocket. "Okay, ma'am."
Serrimissani approached as he walked out of earshot. "It's as well
that the crew has no matriarchs on board," she said. "Or
you might be criticized for leaving at such a critical time."
"Recovering my friends is important."
"For Aras and Ade," said Serrimissani.
"For me. Because I said I
would."
Nevyan wondered if she should have sent Aras instead,
however traumatic it would be for him. No.
She had promised.
She would make the retrieval quickly, though. These
were testing times for F'nar and all Wess'ej.
Da Shapakti was fascinated by the concern shown
for Shan's corpse. Aras had begun learning Eqbas'u with Serrimissani's
mediation and there was one word that leapt out at him above all
others: suta'ej.
Shapakti used it a lot. It meant of
use. The Eqbas commander trailed after Aras and Ade through the
center of F'nar, making urgent sounds and smelling of excitement.
"His crew don't say much," said Ade, glancing behind
him. He would always be a soldier, sizing up risk, needing to know
terrain and locations. Aras thought it was a good habit to retain. "You
sure it's safe to let them go through your archives?"
"There is no harm in knowledge."
"That's not how we see it."
"Wess'har don't use knowledge as gethes
do." Aras had agreed to follow Ade without knowing where he was going.
Ade had a digging tool in one hand, a soldier's implement that folded
in half. "What do you wish to show me?"
"Somewhere that matters. Something for Shan."
They walked out onto the plain and towards one of the
lava-topped bluffs that dotted the landscape. Shapakti followed. Ade
stopped and turned back to him.
"This is private," he said.
Shapakti looked at Aras, bewildered. He could tell Ade
was annoyed: even if the Eqbas couldn't read his body language, he
could smell him, and Ade now had a distinct wess'har alarm scent when
he was stressed.
"Ade isn't happy that
you're following us," said Aras, hoping he had the right eqbas'u word.
"I want to see," said Shapakti. "I want to find out as
much as I can about gethes."
"This isn't a good time."
"Is Ade c'naatat too?"
"Yes. We both are. The only two left alive."
Shapakti thought visibly. Aras could see the process on
his face. "When you recover the body, may we examine it? C'naatat
is fascinating."
It was a very wess'har attitude, utterly pragmatic and
moral, examining only dead creatures because interfering with live ones
was anathema. It was an approach that humans would have done well to
adopt. But Ade wouldn't see it that way. There was a part of Aras--the
part shaped by nearly two hundred years of living with humans--that
didn't see it that way either.
"What's he want?" asked Ade.
"He wants to learn. He also wants to examine the body
to find out more about c'naatat."
Ade's face drained of color. "Tell him he'll be
examining the butt of my frigging rifle if he so much as looks at her."
He glared at Shapakti. "No. Understand?"
Aras paraphrased. It was from unfamiliarity with
eqbas'u, not diplomacy. "Ade is very upset about Shan. He blames
himself for the events that led to her death, so I advise you not to
raise the subject again. He's a restrained man but when he angers he's
capable of injuring you badly."
"Does that word no
indicate refusal?"
Ade appeared to latch on to the one English word in the
sentence immediately.
"No," Ade snapped. "Absolutely not.
And we're not leaving her for the scavengers, either.
She's going to have a proper burial."
Shapakti stopped where he stood and let them walk on.
Ade glanced back over his shoulder now and again as if checking.
Eventually he stopped. When Aras looked, Shapakti was gone.
The top of the lava formation had precious little soil
on it, barely enough to plant yellow-leaf. If this was the site for
Shan's grave, they would have a hard time digging one. And it would be
shallow.
"This is a cairn," said Ade.
A carefully built pyramid of rocks and pebbles stood a
couple of meters from the edge of the plateau, about waist-high to a
human.
Ade rubbed his nose on the back of his hand. "I
couldn't bear her not having a proper grave."
"A gravestone?" Aras suddenly felt excluded, but he'd
always known that Ade had desired Shan. The marines had teased him
about it. Shan had desired him, too. He wondered if Ade had ever seen
him as an interloper. "I made a head-stone for Lindsay Neville's baby.
It was colored glass."
"You understand, then."
Aras did, but he had never understood why some humans
were repelled by the idea of their bodies being devoured by creatures
like rockvelvets. What did they think decomposition was? Decay and
predation were both consumption, returning the components of life to
the great cycle. Even the colonists of Constantine, who believed
inexplicably in resurrection, adopted the local custom.
"Shan was raised as a Pagan," said Aras. "I don't think
she would mind being left for the srebil."
"She certainly wouldn't like being used for research, I
know that much. Jesus, she was EnHaz. You know how she felt about
scientists."
It didn't matter. Aras thought it was an unhealthy
preoccupation to care about inert, unfeeling remains when the being
that made them beloved had gone. But if it helped Ade cope with his
grief, then it had purpose.
"I will dig," said Aras. He held out his hand for the
folding spade.
"Okay."
"Are you angry that Nevyan wouldn't take us on the
recovery mission?"
Ade looked down at the cairn, arms folded, chin tucked
in. "She was being thoughtful. I know she wanted to make sure Shan was…
presentable before we saw her."
"Have my memories made this worse for you?"
"In what way?"
"Genetic memory. Have you no recollections of her that
have originated from me? C'naatat does
that. Shan had them, so you might too."
Ade appeared to realize what Aras meant. "Not of the
kind I think you mean."
It was a great pity: they could so easily have been
true house-brothers, like wess'har males united by a shared isan.
Aras hadn't missed having brothers for
many years but he needed that comfort now. And Ade's scent said brother.
The soil was hard going. Ade eventually held out his
hand for the spade to take his turn but Aras shook his head.
"When do we ask for Neville and Rayat to be
extra-dited?" Ade asked. "Formally, that is."
"When I've thought of a penalty which will achieve
something beyond revenge," said Aras.
"Long way to go, then, mate." Ade added another pearly
stone to the cairn and stood with his head slightly bowed for a few
moments. "Long, long way."
Nevyan had never traveled further than the
distance between the twin planets of Wess'ej and Bezer'ej. She was now
far beyond that space with Serrimissani for support, marveling at a
starscape for once not wholly dominated by her two home planets.
She had promised Aras that she would find Shan's body
and bring it home, and it had been very hard to find a corpse in space.
The ussissi patrol had patiently followed the extrapolated vector from
the coordinates that Ade had provided, seeking not only Shan
Frankland's remains but also those of Vijissi. They were determined to
bring their own people home, too.
"Will you let Aras and Ade see the body?" asked
Serrimissani. "They were most insistent."
"That depends on how it appears and how presentable we
can make it before we return."
"They are both soldiers. Neither are squeamish."
"I suspect that's irrelevant when the remains are those
of a loved one."
The craft rendezvoused with the patrol vessel, matching
its speed as it followed the tiny speck of debris at a careful
distance. It was Shan's body, still drifting. Nevyan tilted her head to
let her pupils get a better focus as it grew larger in the viewing
screen set in the bulkhead. The object was rolling slowly; then she
could pick out a human shape, exaggerated by the stark brightness and
complete shadow created by Ceret's light. Then it resolved into more
detail, showing a human in a position that suggested a fall, arms
outstretched, legs slightly bent.
There was no sign of Vijissi.
"Bring her in," said Nevyan.
A suited ussissi from the patrol craft steered himself
carefully on the end of a long tether, tracking alongside the body
until he was close enough to secure it with a line. As the shuttle
hauled it in, Shan's limbs appeared to change position, giving the
semblance of life; but when Nevyan concentrated her gaze she could see
she was still in the same rigid pose. Shan's face had no visible
features or hair, just an unbroken pale sheen that Nevyan assumed was
some frozen matter.
Transferring the body from the patrol vessel to the
shuttle was slow. Two suited ussissi laid the corpse on the long bench
running along one bulkhead in the cargo bay and withdrew as the bay
hatch closed and the compartment flooded with air again. Shan Frankland
was nearly home.
"This is hard," said Nevyan.
"I will stand with you," said Serrimissani.
Nevyan looked down at the body on the bench and
struggled to cope.
The clothing was Shan's. It was her informal uniform,
the dark blue jacket and trousers, and it was faded and damaged. Ragged
holes peppered the legs and hips, and the boots were cracked and
peeling. That detail was all that Nevyan could focus on because she
could hardly bear to look at the corpse.
It didn't look like Shan at all.
Nevyan had no idea what was typical for a human exposed
to vacuum, let alone one who carried c'naatat.
The body was emaciated as if it had been sucked dry of all fluid and
flesh. No, this was not a body. It was
Shan Frankland. It was her friend.
Shan was a husk swathed in a milky transparent layer
that coated as much of her exposed skin as Nevyan could see. She was
simply bone wrapped in tight-stretched paper, hands clenched into
fists; her uniform gapped at cuffs and collar as if it had been someone
else's. It didn't look as if her death had been peaceful.
She was unrecognizable. Aras would be devastated to see
her.
Nevyan reached out cautiously and touched her cheek.
The coating was waxy to the touch and it flaked away at the point of
the cheekbone. The skin beneath was lined and dry like efte
bark.
"Fetch me some water," she said. "I'll remove it. I
can't let Aras see her like this. He's suffered enough." She brushed
away a few more flakes. "And these bullet holes in her clothing--I
think
that might be too much for him if he's to remain friends with Sergeant
Bennett."
Nevyan stood and gazed down at Shan and her heart broke
again, just as it had when she had first heard of her death. It had
seemed a terrible sacrifice then and it seemed even more of one now.
Tap… tap-tap-tap-tap.
Something metallic hit the deck, then bounced and
rolled. Nevyan froze briefly at the noise and bent down to see that it
was a small, deformed metal tube very much like the bullets Shan put in
her weapon.
Nevyan picked up the casing and examined it, wondering
how much pain it had caused when it smashed through Shan's muscles and
bones. The number of holes in her uniform indicated she had been hit by
at least twenty shots.
And Ade had said she was still hard to subdue even
after taking that many hits. Shan had been right: c'naatat
was exactly the kind of adaptation that should never fall into the
hands of the gethes' military forces.
Serrimissani brought a flask of water and some cloth,
taking one piece in her hand. "I'll help," she said. "The shuttle is
resuming the search. Vijissi must be in this sector too. He went with
her."
There was another tap and
bounce as a second bullet fragment fell to the floor. Nevyan didn't
think she had moved the body that far, but she had dislodged the
fragment somehow. She began wiping gently at Shan's face with a wad of
moistened fabric.
The eyes were closed, sunk in bony sockets. As more of
the coating fell away Nevyan could see that the mouth was frozen wide
open in one final desperate gasp for air. She almost let herself slip
into that motionless state of shock, the primitive wess'har instinct to
stop and assess threat, but she had to carry on. Perhaps, with more
water and the warmth of the cabin, the body might soften enough for her
to close the mouth and restore some semblance of peace and dignity
before Aras demanded to see it.
Nevyan dabbed at the exposed skin. The water appeared
to be hydrating it in places, easing the appearance of parchment into
something more like human flesh. Shan had never seemed vain, but she
had cared about looking well groomed. She didn't look groomed any
longer.
The coating clung to the cloth and Nevyan had to shake
it off into a bowl. Then she placed her hands gently on Shan's wasted
cheeks, overtaken by grief and regret and anger that she had lost her
after such a short friendship.
"You'll be home soon," she said. Talking to the dead
was a foolish thing that gethes did, but
Nevyan couldn't come this close to her and not speak. "You'll be part
of the world again. And then I'll balance the gethes."
Nevyan had seen gethes
mothers kiss their children. She had even seen Aras kiss Shan; it
seemed a universal human expression of affection. So she bent and
kissed Shan's forehead, alien as the act seemed. The c'naatat
parasite was dead. She could touch Shan
now without risk of contamination.
"I'm sorry, isanket. I
wasn't there to help you."
Shan's eyes jerked open.
Wess'har didn't scream. But Nevyan did.
Frankland sparked
controversy in her first appointment as divisional inspector of Reading
Metro Nine, where she cut crime figures by 75 percent in her first six
months of command. "It's old-style policing," she said at the time. "If
anyone steps out of line, they'll get a clip round the ear, and if they
do it twice, then they can say goodbye to the ear completely." Her
uncompromising approach--typified by frequent use of decitizenization
and complaints of brutality--angered some politicians but earned her
allies in the wider community. "I learned diplomacy after that," she
said. Did she take a more softly-softly approach? "No," she said. "I
just stopped shooting my mouth off about it."
EDDIE MICHALLAT,
One Copper's Story,
BBChan Publishing
Shan let out a long rattling breath that
trailed off into small gasps.
Nevyan knew that corpses sometimes appeared to move or
exhale for perfectly explicable reasons, but this wasn't a trick of
expanding air or contracting tissue.
Shan was alive.
Her eyelids fluttered and then half closed. But she was
breathing.
"This might only be a reaction to temperature changes,"
said Serrimissani. She seemed calm, as if corpses came to life before
her every day. "It is unthinkable that she could have survived so long
in space."
Nevyan shook herself out of her freeze reflex and put
her hand cautiously on Shan's chest. Humans had pumping hearts, strong
enough to be detected.
She felt a brief kick. Then there was another, and
another, and then the thump-thump-thump
became steadier. It was slow, but it was regular; there was a
heartbeat, a real human heartbeat.
"It's also unthinkable that she survived being shot in
the head, or under water, but she did." Nevyan reached for protective
gloves. If c'naatat had preserved Shan in
these circumstances, it too was alive and it was a risk. She regretted
the kiss. "She may be able to hear us."
Nevyan drizzled some water into Shan's mouth from the
cloth and waited. The continuous wheeze spluttered into convulsive
coughing. "Shan," she said. "Shan, can you hear me?"
There was no response, but she was breathing in great
sawing gasps. Nevyan knew almost nothing about human physiology, but
perhaps that didn't matter; Shan wasn't wholly human. She was an
amalgam of whatever c'naatat had collected
and carried with it from host to host and then selected for her
survival. One organism must have had the capacity to survive hard
vacuum and irradiation.
The water was now triggering rapid changes. Shan's skin
was taking on a pink color, and her limbs and eyelids were twitching.
Whatever mechanism had kept her dormant was now kicking her back to
normality. Nevyan hoped that it had kept her oblivious, too; the
thought of drifting conscious in the void was terrifying.
"She needs more water," Serrimissani said. "Perhaps we
need to immerse her. You said she could survive in water."
"Yes, but--"
"Water is probably her immediate need. Then food."
"Shan? Shan, if you can hear us, move your arms."
There was no response. The pilot, summoned from the
cockpit by Nevyan's uncharacteristic shriek, pulled a sheet of fabric
from a locker. "Support the corners, and we can fill this with water
and place her in it," he said. He unbolted a bench and turned it over
to lash the corners of the sheet to its legs. Most of their water
supply went to fill it to a depth that would cover Shan's body. Nevyan
cut her uniform from her, lifted away the ballistic vest, and immersed
her in the makeshift bath.
She weighs so little.
More waxy coating crumbled away and floated on the
surface. Shan's open mouth filled with water and she began coughing and
retching, blowing great streams of bubbles. Her paper-husk frame
convulsed and her eyes jerked open again but she didn't seem to be
focusing. Her limbs thrashed weakly and then she sank back, lips
opening and closing like a suckling child. Her eyes closed.
She was still breathing, though.
"Do we leave her there?" asked the pilot.
Nevyan and Serrimissani leaned over the bath. "The
moment she appears to be in difficulties, we take her out."
"I will send a message--"
"No." Nevyan checked her own immediate urge to notify
Aras. It would be agonizingly wonderful news. However welcome it was,
it would hit him hard after he had come to terms with her death. And if
Shan failed to hang on to life this time, Aras would suffer the pain of
losing her again.
There was also the matter of discovery. The world
thought Shan was dead, and with her the c'naatat
parasite colony that lived within her. A careless message over the ITX,
as Eddie had named it, could be intercepted by anyone. Once they knew
she was alive they would hunt her again.
Nevyan decided the news would have to wait.
They watched Shan intently, counting each breath. She
had curled up, bony arms tucked into her chest, knees drawn up, a
skeleton plated with thin pale skin. Nevyan could see the pulse in her
throat and temples, and the bones that ran out from the top of her ribs
and ended at her shoulders.
"How are we going to feed her?" asked Serrimissani.
"If she can swallow water, she can take liquid
nutrients."
"We have nothing on board."
"We need to get her back to Wess'ej as quickly as we
can."
"No, we look for Vijissi. If Shan survived, so might
he."
Nevyan reached under the water, soaking her dhren,
and lifted Shan's head clear of the
water, noting how much heavier she felt now. She coughed and retched.
Water splashed the deck. "If Vijissi is alive, then he has c'naatat
too and he'll survive until we find
him. If he doesn't, then extra time will make no difference to the
dead."
Serrimissani stared up at Nevyan, an unblinking
matte-black gaze. "Dead, alive, we still search for him and bring him
home."
Nevyan knew better than to argue with an ussissi. But
her priority was to keep Shan alive. C'naatat
or not--miracle or not--she needed to get
her
back to Wess'ej. "We leave the patrol vessel to resume the search and
we return to F'nar," she said firmly.
Serrimissani simply stared back, grim and feral. It was
an uncomfortable moment. A human friend mattered more than a ussissi.
It must have seemed that way to her.
"Very well," she said at last, but reluctantly. "That
seems reasonable."
Nevyan had never trod that fine line between having a
ussissi's loyalty and losing it to the pack instinct. It felt
precarious. It was.
She propped Shan's head on the edge of the sheeting and
wiped her face while Serrimissani hunted for something to serve as a
blanket. The shock and relief of finding Shan alive at all had
suspended her horror at the state of her body for a while and now she
wondered how Aras would react to her physical state.
"There's nothing suitable," said Serrimissani.
Together they lifted Shan from the water and laid her
back on the bench. Nevyan took off her dhren
and wrapped it around her. This was how Asajin had been carried to the
plain to be left for the carrion-eating creatures, with her fine
matriarch's dhren as her shroud.
Serrimissani dripped water into Shan's mouth. She
coughed it back up. "Perhaps her swallowing reflex will return. Her
appearance is improving."
Improvement was a relative term. She still looked like
a long-dead cadaver. Nevyan tried to imagine what it felt like to
asphyxiate and for your body fluids to boil. and to drift in absolute,
indefinable nothing for months. She would have been unconscious. She
was sure of that.
"It's a terrible thing to die in space," she said.
"Even more terrible to survive in it," said
Serrimissani.
Nevyan's home was deserted when Eddie got back.
It was usually a noisy melee of youngsters and jurej've
at this time of the morning, but he made his way through the
interconnecting chambers and found nobody.
Perhaps they'd gone to the fields early because Nevyan
was due back and they wanted to be home to greet her. She'd be in need
of support, he knew that much: it couldn't be easy see a friend's
corpse, even for a matriarch as self-possessed as Nevyan.
There was a heavy finality to recovering the body. Now
he accepted that Shan was truly dead, and the feeling that she might
walk through the door at any time was fading fast. At least he hadn't
imagined he still saw her or heard her, slipping elusively into a crowd
or evaporating on closer inspection. He wasn't sure he could handle
that.
He ladled a cup of water from a bowl and sipped it
while he tried his hand against the console in the main room.
Eventually the screen kicked into life. Without Giyadas to show him, it
took him minutes to find the route into the ITX link to Earth.
Jesus, Ual's actually going to
do it. He's going to defy his own government. Eddie rehearsed
how he might tell Nevyan, with no idea of how she would react. She
might launch an attack: wess'har fired up in a heartbeat. Is this
what I was really doing on Earth? Did I just
spew out information and leave a trail of chaos for others to deal with?
There were no anonymous others to clear up now. He was face-to-face
with the real consequences of his precious truth.
Truth my arse.
With a few prompts from his fingers, the image of the
Exchange of Surplus Things rearranged itself in the smooth stone of the
wall and he was looking at the holding screen for BBChan's router. He
wondered if 'Desk was pleased with the story and braced himself for the
five-second time lag.
"Jesus Christ, where the hell have you been?"
Mick was on duty again, and he didn't
look pleased at all.
"Umeh," he said. "I thought you wanted me to get access
to Umeh Station."
"Forget Umeh Station. You file a fucking story on an
alien invasion and eternal life, then piss off for a day?" Counting to
five evidently didn't help Mick's temper any more than it did Eddie's.
"No follow-up?"
"I got the piece across,"
he said slowly. "No mean feat."
"Yeah, and--"
"Did you run the frigging story?"
"You want to see? Here."
Mick switched him through to an output channel. Eddie expected to see
his own brief bombshell against a backdrop of Surang's skyline but it
wasn't that at all.
The segment started with a long shot of flames licking
through the shattered windows of an office building ringed by a high
wall, or at least it would have been ringed if the wrought-work gates
weren't hanging off their hinges and the wall hadn't been breached in
one place by a truck. The crawler caption said FEU
DIPLOMATIC CENTER HEADQUARTERS, TSHWANE, AFRICAN ALLIANCE. The
stone-throwing, looting crowd provided a better commentary than any
voice-over or textlink.
"Europe isn't flavor of the month in some parts of the
world now," said Mick.
"Just on the strength of my piece?"
"Just on the strength of our diplomatic correspondent
asking the Rim States embassy in Brussels whether the FEU had discussed
the Eqbas Vorhi with them. We're in melt-down here. The emergency
debate in the UN is still running. If we're lucky, it's sanctions."
"Not much they can do apart from sanctions."
"Oh, there is. The Sinostates are talking about taking
over the ITX-router uplink in a neutral
capacity to defuse the situation."
"Jesus." War: it meant nothing else. "They knew,
Mick. They bloody knew."
"You can confirm that, can you? Because they're denying
it pretty vigorously."
Eddie's mouth opened on a reflex to explain that he
could, but then he thought of Ual. All his rules of engagement about on
and off the record had flown out the window. Did it matter? If Eddie
confirmed it, would that make matters worse on Earth, or would it make
them worse for Ual, or both? Wess'har didn't have any problem with
information. Eddie envied them. Knowledge was the heart of his guilt.
But the denial was a lie, and lies were there to be
exposed. It was pure instinct. "Yes, Minister Ual told them. And either
way, the buggers are coming. Does it matter?"
"It does if everyone thinks that's not all they're
being told. I need something down the line from you fast."
"You're being monitored."
"I don't give a fuck. You think the FEU's going to pull
the plug now?"
Eddie was usually so focused on a story that it ate him
alive. This time he had another story, closer to home, and one in which
he was equally mired. Both had started tumbling like an avalanche. He
had to get to Nevyan and tell her what Ual was planning: and he had a
responsibility to events he had helped unleash on Earth.
It never used to be this hard.
"Okay, I'll see if Ual will talk to me about Eqbas
Vorhi on camera. Meanwhile, get a talking head. Haven't you got a tame
biologist to interview?"
"I want it live from the spot, Eddie."
"You want to come 150 trillion fucking miles out here
and do it yourself? I've got a war starting up here."
"So have we."
Eddie made the hardest decision of his life, one that
stripped him of his identity more surely than Ade's discarded stripes
had erased him as a sergeant.
"Later," he said. "I've got something to do that's more
urgent than a story."
And Eddie Michallat ceased to be a reporter, not in
name, but in the core of his being. He closed the relay and left.
Ade regretted that his best blues and his white
Wolseley helmet were seventy-five years in the past on a planet he
could never return to, Earth. It would have been nice to turn out
really smart for the Boss one last time.
He made another attempt to press a sharp crease into
his DPM combat trousers and reassured himself that under these
circumstances it was the effort that counted. You couldn't press
crease-proof kit properly with the heated blade of a fighting knife.
He pulled on the trousers, made sure they were tucked
neatly into his calf-high combat boots, and adjusted his beret. Then he
reassembled his ESF670 rifle and slid the magazine into its catch.
Aras wandered up behind him. "You won't need that."
Ade checked the scope and flicked through the settings.
If he had to fire, it would be at close quarters. The calibration
didn't matter.
"They want a chunk of her? Well, they're going to have
to go through me."
"They know how strongly you feel about it."
Ade didn't trust the Eqbas. He knew how wess'har
thought; fragments of Aras's memory gave him a definite emotional sense
of the wess'har mind. They didn't mess around with life. But he didn't
know how different the last ten thousand years had made the Eqbas. The
fact that they asked to do a post mortem at all worried him.
Aras showed no sign of emotion at all, and that worried
Ade more than the self-destructive rage and grief that had brought the
wess'har to the brink of using a grenade on himself. That was how you
made sure c'naatat didn't try to put you
back together again. Eddie had talked Aras out of it. He could really
use words, that bloke: Ade envied him.
Aras put his hand gently on the rifle. "Shooting is
unnecessary."
"You stick to your job, and I'll stick to mine."
"Ade, I know how hard this is."
"You can't know. You ever caused the death of someone
you cared about?"
Aras made a small huff
that could have been contempt. "I've lost many, many people."
"It isn't the same. I've had my mates die on me more
than once, but I handed Shan over to die.
You think about that. I can't ever put that right, but I can bust my
arse trying to make sure she actually does rest in some sort of peace."
Sometimes he didn't feel comfortable talking to Aras.
He liked him a lot and counted him as a mate, but Aras always seemed to
be thinking things that Ade couldn't even imagine. He made him
cautious, afraid of looking stupid. And he had been Shan's choice, and
Ade hadn't. It put things in perspective.
"Ade, let me talk to Shapakti."
"You think I'm some knuckle-dragging grunt looking for
a fight, don't you?"
"No, I think you're a man who has been through a great
deal of stress. It's not unreasonable to be agitated."
"I'm trained to talk to people. When the talking fails,
I shoot. But I talk first. You ever done urban peacekeeping? You want
to know what you do when you're being stoned by women and children?"
"You threw the stones back, if I recall correctly,"
said Aras. "But I'm sorry. I'm not handling this well." He indicated
the door. "Go on. Do what you feel you have to."
Ade was instantly reduced to shame and embarrassment by
the wess'har's soothing tone. Shit, Aras had lost his wife. His
own grief blinded him to that.
"Sorry. I was well out of order there."
"We've all been well out of order
in recent weeks. It would be insulting to Shan if we were not
diminished by her death."
Aras seemed suddenly calmer for finally knowing where
Shan was. "I'd better be off, then," said Ade.
F'nar was like one of those housing estates they built
to cut down on crime. With its single frontage of curved inward-looking
terraces, everyone could see you come and go; and everyone knew where
Ade was going.
"It's cold," said Lisik, one of Nevyan's four husbands.
He had picked up a little English from Nevyan or maybe even his
daughter, Giyadas. He didn't seem intent on learning more than he had
to. "Vehicle, not walking. I take you?"
Ade thought it was just a pleasantly crisp day, but
wess'har felt the cold. "Thanks."
"No Aras?"
"Aras is preparing the grave."
"What is grave?"
"Never mind."
F'nar didn't have a shuttle port. It wasn't the way
wess'har built, not here anyway, although the pictures of Eqbas Vorhi
seemed to suggest that they once did. The jungle of pipes, conduits and
service buildings needed to handle its few flights was somewhere
underground where it didn't spoil the scenery. Lisik stopped the
vehicle apparently in the middle of nowhere.
"You sure this is the right place?" said Ade.
"We wait," said Lisik.
Ade picked specks off his lovat pullover. He'd wanted a
body to grieve over and so had Aras, but now that it was a reality it
was also a reminder--if he needed one--that he'd fired at least twenty
rounds into Shan's body. He'd taken enough gunshot wounds to know how
much pain they caused.
And she'd head-butted him. She'd sworn at him, called
him a frigging idiot, despised him in her
final moments because he had failed her. He didn't protect her. He
hadn't protected his mum from his father either, not once. No wonder
his dad had called him a gutless little bastard. He was.
People said they would give everything if they could
spend just five minutes again with someone they'd lost, but what Ade
had never known was just how powerful and painful that feeling could be
until now.
There was no sign of Shapakti or his crew. If they
wanted a sample of c'naatat, they could
take it from him. He didn't care any more.
"Not long," said Lisik.
A muffled boom like
shelling in a distant war broke the silence. A craft was beginning its
descent. The small point of reflected sunlight became a blue disc and
then resolved into a blunt-nosed cylinder that spiraled lower and then
descended vertically, kicking up a skirt of dust.
How are they going to bring her
out?
The hatch remained closed.
Wess'har don't give a shit about
bodies. No coffins, no body bags. Oh, God.
The clicking of cooling metal gave way to the chunk-chunk-chunk
of securing bolts being
withdrawn. The three-part hatch door cracked open and the lower section
peeled out into a ramp. Serrimissani scuttled down it and Ade stepped
forward, rifle shouldered, stomach churning, wanting it all to be over
and hating himself for his haste.
"I want you to remain calm," said Serrimissani.
Oh, God, no. It was going
to be bad. He made himself look towards the open hatch. It felt like
every moment before the first shell landed, before the shooting
started, before the ramp went down on the assault craft, except he
didn't feel trained and armed against this at all.
"Get inside," she said.
The shuttle smelled of panic. Ade had never consciously
noticed scent before, and he realized that his senses were changing
just as Aras had said. He wondered if his bowels would let him down. He
knew it happened to plenty of people--plenty of seasoned combat
troops--but he wished it wouldn't happen to him. There was something
about harmed women that triggered it badly. He thought of his father
knocking seven shades of shit out of his mother.
You could have saved her.
Ade didn't recognize what was lying wrapped in a piece
of iridescent fabric on the bench. Nevyan was leaning over it. He
passed through that familiar split second where the rest of his field
of vision was gray fog and he could see just one awful detail: and this
time it was the back of a skull, two cords of tendon flanking a knob of
vertebra.
"Oh God." Don't turn the body. I
can't cope with seeing her face. Don't--
Nevyan's head jerked round, eyes vividly yellow like an
animal's. "She's alive," she said. "We didn't dare send a message.
Nobody must know."
Everything was playing back to him delayed by a second.
She's alive. Ade heard the sound but the
meaning didn't sink in. Then there was absolute silence.
The skeletal, hairless head moved slightly.
Ade felt his legs start to buckle under him. He could
hear himself saying, "How? How? How?" over
and over again. But his training kicked in and he seized it gratefully,
blind to what he was looking at because it was too awful to dwell on.
"Is she conscious?"
"No," said Nevyan.
He couldn't call for medical support. And whatever
Shan's body was doing, it was well beyond the skills of anyone trained
to deal with ordinary humans. If c'naatat
had kept her alive through all that, then there wasn't much else to be
done except to give it some energy to draw on. It looked as if it had
already eaten her alive.
"Get her back home." Ade couldn't work out why his
hands weren't shaking. "Just get her back home. Now."
Aras didn't want to bury the swiss with Shan's
body. While he understood the human need behind Ade's request, Shan had
no use for it.
But I do. It was a
comfort to him.
Shapakti watched while he hacked out the grave, turning
occasionally to look out from the cliff across the plain.
"A corpse can't see the view," he said unhelpfully.
"This is an act for the living, not for the dead."
"Burying it will obstruct the scavengers."
Aras laid down his tools and stood up. "It
was my isan," he
said. "And if you make any attempt whatsoever to touch her body I will
personally kill you, and if I do not, then Ade Bennett will. Confine
your curiosity about c'naatat to me. Do
you understand?"
It was unthinkable for one wess'har to even consider
threatening another. They were a species built on consensus, but Aras's
humanity had swept that aside in its pain. Shapakti cocked his head,
suitably chastened.
"Sir," he said.
"This medication you take. Does it reduce your
emotional longing for your isan?"
"A little."
Aras had wanted to hear the word completely.
But it was unlikely the drug would have breached his c'naatat's
robust defenses anyway. Perhaps
trying to forget his pain was an act of betrayal. He knelt down and sat
back on his heels, waiting.
"What is the red object?" asked Shapakti.
"A swiss. A device for communications and data
gathering, among other things. It belonged to Shan Frankland and she
valued it greatly."
"May I examine it?"
"No."
It wasn't Shapakti's fault. He was simply being
wess'har--pragmatic, exact, unsentimental. The position of the grave
didn't matter and neither did the swiss; nothing of Shan would be here
to enjoy the vista, and Aras had embedded memories of his isan
more vivid than those in the swiss. But the
modest ritual mattered. That much of him
was human, he realized.
So he waited. Shapakti said nothing and waited with him.
Irregular scrambling footsteps and tumbling pebbles
announced an approach. Aras expected Ade to appear with the body, and
he braced himself for the moment, ashamed of dreading it, but it was
Serrimissani. She was running. The wind was in the wrong direction to
smell her state of mind but Aras needed no scent cues to tell she was
extremely agitated.
He feared the worst, but under the circumstances he was
at a loss to think what worse could
possibly be.
Maybe they hadn't found Shan after all. The thought was
agonizing. He had prepared himself for this and it had not been easy.
He stood up.
"What is it?"
Serrimissani stood panting. "This will be hard for you
to understand," she said. "You must come with me. Shan is alive."
She wasn't making sense. "Don't. Don't do this to me."
"She is alive."
"That's impossible."
Serrimissani turned to go back down the slope but Aras
grabbed her by her decorative belts, jerking her back. Shapakti was
forgotten for the moment. "She cannot be
alive. Unless Ade lied."
"He didn't."
Shapakti didn't appear to understand the conversation
but he had certainly reacted to the excitement. He was standing
absolutely wess'har-still, alarmed: Aras was seeing more similarities
than differences in the Eqbas now. He beckoned to him.
"Go back to your crew," Aras said carefully. "We have
no body to bury."
"Were the ussissi mistaken?"
"That's not your concern. Go."
Serrimissani was wrong.
There was a rational explanation for this, and it would be
heartbreaking. Aras prepared himself for the distress and waited until
Shapakti was well out of earshot. He turned on her, angry in
anticipation of having his hopes dashed.
"Not even c'naatat can
survive in space."
"But she has. We can argue
about the mechanism later. Come. But prepare yourself--her appearance
will upset you."
Aras struggled. Over the years he had picked up the
human habit of suppressing his reactions. "And this is not a
shock? That she has survived in space?"
"She's not conscious."
Aras didn't want to hear any more. He wanted to see.
He set off at a run and eventually he
couldn't hear anyone behind him. He didn't look back.
Shapakti, I don't
understand. Why do humans say they were only following orders? Don't
they understand that it is even worse to obey a
bad order than to give one? I suspect that they delight in being
loathsome.
SARMATAKIAN
VE,
adviser to the council of matriarchs of Eqbas Vorhi,
commonly known as the World Before
Eddie sprinted along the terraces. His
lungs were screaming for air but he needed to find Nevyan. She wasn't
responding to the virin.
He headed for Aras's home. He needed not
to be alone with what was now in his head.
Wess'har going about their business took no notice of him, probably
thinking he was like Ade, just running for fun.
Fun. What the fuck's happened to
me in the last two years? How did I get to be a go-between? His
lungs struggled and he envied Ade his fitness. Maybe
that's all I ever was, a fucking messenger boy.
One wess'har stepped out and stopped him, catching him
roughly by the shoulder. "Body is home," he said. "Understand? Body is
home."
Eddie understood all right. They said things came in
threes. Ual was kicking over the traces, the FEU was under siege, and
now Shan Frankland's body had been brought back for burial. However
urgent his problems, Ade and Aras would be in far worse shape than he
ever would.
"I understand," said Eddie. "Thanks."
He set off again, this time at a prudent fast walk. He
wiped the sweat off his face and pushed cautiously on Aras's door.
There was no sign of Nevyan. He could hear Ade and Aras talking.
"Is she responding at all? Is anyone thinking of how we
feed her?"
"Nevyan said she's coughing up water."
"Can she swallow?"
"Not as such."
"What do you mean, not as such?"
"Best she could do was drip it down her throat."
It didn't make sense.
Eddie walked into the small side chamber that had been
Ade's room. Why's he taken the body in there?
Aras and Ade were leaning over the bed and they both straightened up
and turned to look at Eddie at the same time. And Nevyan was standing
watching them in silence.
Body. Oh God, God, God.
"Eddie," said Nevyan. "I should have called you. Shan's
back."
"I know."
"No, she's alive."
There were days when so much water poured down the pipe
that one more bucketful didn't make you drown any faster. He turned the
word over in his mind. He looked at it and nothing made sense.
"She can't be alive. That can't be her."
Nevyan simply beckoned him forward. "It's true."
Eddie forced himself to look at the body and he heard a
little uhhh noise that he thought might be
her, or even Ade; and then he realized it was his own voice, his own
disbelief and shock escaping from his throat.
Shan looked dead--no, she looked worse than dead. She
looked mummified. She didn't look like a
woman and she didn't look even remotely like Shan. Ade pulled a dhren
across her body, frowning at him. Eddie
hadn't even noticed that she was naked.
"She wasn't drifting?" he asked. He couldn't even form
a question.
He'd seen plenty of dead bodies before. He'd seen--and
smelled--bodies in ditches at the side of the main road into Ankara,
hacked about, misshapen kit people in pieces who only looked real
because there were flies swarming on them that billowed up in a black
cloud when he leaned a little too close to look. A small white dog had
been eating one of the bodies, worrying at the shattered skull of a
young woman. It was a poodle with a blue glittery collar; a civilized
thing gone feral, like all the humans around it.
The roadside dead were strangers. Shan was a friend,
more or less.
"Eddie," said Ade. "It's a shock for all of us. Take it
easy."
"What?"
"Don't ask how. All we know is that she's still alive."
Eddie said alive to
himself several times. He tried not to put his hand to his mouth, but
it was hard.
"Oh my God," he said. "Oh my God."
Real shock was a strange thing. Eddie found that
another part of his brain took over and said training,
training, training. He reached for his camera. It was only
Nevyan's crushing grip on his arm that stopped him.
Ade showed remarkably little emotion. He'd probably
seen a lot worse on the battlefield. There wasn't the slightest hint
that the marine was looking at a woman he cared for, or even that he
had misgivings about having emptied a magazine into her. He knelt down
beside the bed and looked for all the world as if he was praying. Aras
slid his hand under Shan's head and moved the pillow.
Ade stood up again. "I can intubate. If you've got a
tube about so wide, I can get it down her throat." He indicated the
width with close-held fingertips. "I can do basic first aid."
"Well, neither of us can, so that makes you the brain
surgeon," said the part of Eddie that was coping. The other part was
still staring at an unrecognizable skeleton that had once been a woman
who physically terrified him. "I left some brewing kit here. Tubes,
squeeze-bulbs, that kind of stuff."
"Close enough."
Eddie rummaged through the jumble of efte
boxes in the storage area he had once used
as a bedroom and pulled out the coils of tubing and funnels that he'd
filched from the Thetis mission's lab. It
felt like a lifetime ago. His hands were shaking. Alive. Alive.
He'd almost forgotten the news he'd run
up the terrace to break.
"It's not sterile," he said.
"I don't think that's going to make any difference
now," said Ade. He uncoiled the tubing and measured a length against
Shan's chest. "Why don't you find something liquid enough to pass
through this?"
"Force-feeding will hurt her," said Aras.
Ade's shoulders stiffened. Eddie had never picked up
the slightest hint of aggression from him but he was sensing it now.
"Yeah, but I don't know how to do a percutaneous endogastric tube,"
said Ade irritably. "Besides, cutting a hole in her abdominal wall will
hurt her a fucking sight more, so just get the nutrient, will you?"
There was a brief moment of silence. Then Aras simply
walked away.
Ade stretched out the tube and took the end in one
hand. "Eddie, can you steady her head so I can get the tube in her
nose?"
"Okay…" Oh God. "How do
you know when it's in the stomach?"
"Stomach contents siphoning back."
"Has she got any?"
"Look, I've measured the bloody thing. Halfway between
the end of the sternum and the navel, okay?"
Eddie had never thought of himself as squeamish but
there was something horrific about touching a very frail body. Shan's
scalp was unusually hot against his palm and he could feel the ridges
of bone. He thought briefly of his bee cam and accepted, just this
once, that it was neither the time nor the place. He let Ade work.
"Easy, sweetheart. There…yeah, I know…I know… take it
easy." Ade made a couple of abortive attempts to get the tube past
Shan's throat. For a dead woman, she was doing a credible job of
struggling and gagging. She crunched down hard on his finger: he yelped
and tried to pull free, but she had latched on like a snake and it was
a few seconds before her bite tired and he could withdraw. He wiped
blood on his pants, seeming unconcerned. "Just as well I'm already
infected, eh? Come on… let's try again, sweetheart."
Her struggling grew weaker and eventually he managed to
ease the tube past her throat. He glanced over his shoulder. "Where's
Aras with the bloody mix?"
Aras returned with a glass flask. The contents looked
substantial. Ade seemed unconvinced.
"What's in it?"
"Beet jaggery, the last of the barley flour, and some jay
juice," said Aras.
"You sure you haven't got it in her trachea?" said
Eddie. Oh God. "The tube, I mean."
"I'm sure," said Ade.
"How do you know how much to feed her?"
Ade paused for one beat before replying and it was as
eloquent as a balled fist. "Maximum stomach capacity's three liters,
normal capacity half that, but she's wasted away. So we give her half a
liter slowly every two hours and keep an eye on her. I might even be
able to feel the distension manually, seeing as there's nothing of her.
That's what you do with animals, anyway."
Eddie reconsidered his view of Ade as a simple if
excellent soldier. "Animals?"
"You feel if the stomach's full. I've bottle-fed
orphaned foxes." Ade's face was suddenly different, distracted,
recalling something he didn't like remembering. "At least I did until
my fucking father smashed their heads in."
The room was silent except for the liquid sounds of the
nutrient working through the tube. Occasionally Eddie had glimpses of
what had made Ade Bennett into the man he was and the visions were like
a sightseeing trip to hell. Maybe that was what Shan had spotted. She
had an unerring eye for damaged men who needed her solid reassurance.
And here she was, alive. And she shouldn't have been.
There were lucky escapes, and unbelievable escapes, but this was off
the scale.
"Looks like she's taken it okay." Ade glanced at Aras,
chin lowered. "You want to keep an eye on her while I find something to
secure the tube? Then we can leave it in place for a couple of days and
not have to put her through that each time we feed her."
Eddie noted the placatory we.
He didn't feel that included him. Ade busied himself sorting through
the contents of his pouch belt and seemed to find something in his
emergency medical kit that satisfied him, a small roll of adhesive
tape. He handed it to Aras almost submissively. Aras accepted it, and
with it Ade's silent indication of where he should place the tape to
best anchor the tube.
"Rota," said Ade. "Two hours' watch each. Okay?"
"What if she's brain damaged?" said Eddie.
"I've seen an isenj round blow a hole in her head you
could almost put your hand in and she recovered from that just fine,"
said Ade, wearing his soft voice again. "And if she doesn't pull round
from this--well, then we're going to take care of her for as long as
she
needs it. She's home."
Aras indicated the door with a sharp nod of the head,
effectively dismissing Ade. "I will take the first watch."
Eddie, well used to observing the gamut of emotional
reactions to shocking news, found himself on the terrace staring at his
own shaking hands. The adrenaline was beginning to ebb and the enormity
of events was kicking in, making him rerun the last hour over and over
again in his mind, each time finding the shock of revelation fresh and
breathtaking. Nevyan and Ade joined him.
"I regret not warning you," said Nevyan. "But this was
hardly the information to commit to a public channel."
"Jesus, no."
"It is…extraordinary."
Eddie struggled. "And there was I thinking I had news
for you." He licked dry lips. It was
definitely time for a beer. "You need to know this. Ual's …um… decided
to hand over Lindsay and Rayat, no conditions, but his own government
doesn't know. He's going to get the marines on Umeh to abduct them."
Nevyan didn't turn a hair. "Bold. And sensible."
Eddie, one duty done, fretted over abandoning a story. "He doesn't
want a war."
"How will he achieve this? How am I to contact him if
his government isn't privy to this?"
Ade came out onto the terrace with three mugs of beer
and handed them out. Eddie took a tight grip on the smooth glass but
could hardly feel it. He cupped one hand carefully underneath. "I don't
know," he said. "I have no idea. I'll call him--"
"That can wait now," said Nevyan.
They drank in silence. It was a disgustingly yeasty
brew but it did the job. Nevyan sipped it gingerly, just once, and then
stood nursing the mug.
"You can't get drunk, not with c'naatat,"
said Eddie, mouth on autopilot now. "Shan told me so."
"I know," said Ade. "But I have a great imagination."
He gulped it. "Here's to the Boss."
"How are we going to keep this quiet?"
"Shapakti's going to be all over this. But who would
believe us anyway?"
The best stories were always like that. "Who's
Shapakti?"
"The Eqbas commander who landed. Yeah, they're here. I
should have said."
They're here.
Eddie was making a soft landing now, seeing the world
in the familiar context of sound bites and angles again. His brain had
wrapped up the fact that Shan Frankland had survived where absolutely
no complex organism could, and had hidden it while he calmed down. That
shock had made the situation on Earth somehow more manageable.
"I ought to call 'Desk," said Eddie.
He sat down at the small console in the main room, not
quite seeing the detail of the screen, and reminded himself that he had
seen an awful, awful lot of bizarre and
terrifying and momentous things in his career. This was just one more.
Jesus, she's really alive.
It kept washing back over him. No, this wasn't just one more thing. It
changed everything. The BBChan portal opened.
"Mick," he said. "Mick, I'm back."
There was no recrimination over his abrupt exit. "You
look bloody awful. What's happened?"
Eddie swallowed a particularly large lump of yeast and
hoped the most recent events didn't manifest themselves in a large
cartoon think-bubble above his head. "Yeah," he said. "I ran here. I
can get you some footage of the first Eqbas forces. Maybe today."
"Now that's what I call a
story."
It was asking for trouble to promise 'Desk anything,
but he did it anyway. "Sorry I had to run," said Eddie.
"Hey, you were going after the Eqbas. But tell me that
next time, okay?"
"Okay," said Eddie, and knew there were things he would
now never tell a living soul.
Each day, Lindsay made sure that she knew
exactly where Mohan Rayat was.
She was dead already. She just needed to make sure
Rayat got what was coming to him as well. There was nowhere to run on
Umeh, but she was determined that he wouldn't just melt away into the
endless heaving mass of isenj.
Rayat was in the communications center today, an
optimistic name for a single room that wasn't doing much communicating.
He was having an argument, and she had to hand it to the slimeball: he
could keep his cool.
"Why can't I send this?" demanded one of the
contractors.
"Because it contains more than the basic okay message
the isenj will allow past the relay."
"That's no bloody use."
Rayat had that resigned and immovable look of a man
Just Doing His Job. He didn't seem like a spook at all. His hands were
meshed in front of him on the table like a newscaster.
"You can transmit what you like," he said. "But if it
doesn't consist of the exact words �I am fine' or �systems operating
normally' then the relay is set to bounce it back. So I'm told."
"My company needs this information. It's just operating
data from the CO2 scrubs."
"The isenj don't know that it's not a sophisticated
code containing a message that'll provoke the wess'har."
Rayat said it with a commendably straight face. The
contractor, hands braced on the table, let his head drop between
sagging shoulders in submission to the might of alien bureaucracy.
"Okay. It's bloody stupid, but okay."
Lindsay watched the man leave and slid into the space
he had left.
"Reckon we'll get to the riot stage?" she asked.
"Not if the food holds out," said Rayat.
He looked inexplicably calm for a man who had unleashed
careless massacre. Lindsay now had a very different view of the words extinction
and genocide.
Dead bezeri had helped her see that the two were identical if you just
deleted the notion that it was different for humans.
"Is that the management we
or the royal we?" she said.
"We all have to pull our weight here."
"And how do you see your future?"
"About as bleak as yours. But at least we both know we
don't have to worry about c'naatat any
more."
"Well, that's about all," she lied, thinking of Ade
Bennett raising two contemptuous fingers to her as he left the shuttle,
showing her how fast his broken nose had healed. Rayat couldn't
possibly have seen that. It had to stay that way.
And Aras didn't count. Nobody could take a wess'har,
and a wess'har wouldn't spread c'naatat.
But Ade Bennett had it, and he was human, and one day he might be
homesick or desperate enough to find a way of getting back to Earth.
She'd failed to eradicate the risk--and there was nothing she could do
about it now. She'd have to rely on the wess'har to keep Ade confined.
She wondered if she'd have surrendered if it had been
her, or how long Shan would have held out in exile. But Shan didn't
have any of the appealing human weaknesses that made people care and
love and pine.
"So…I seem to recall your screaming your head off at
Frankland calling her every name under the sun because she wouldn't use
c'naatat to save your baby," said Rayat.
"Thank you for reminding me."
"What if she had?"
Lindsay didn't want to hear any more. She was coping
with bereavement, at least in the sense that she hadn't yet fallen
apart. It had been more than a year since David had died, thirty days
old, and with occasional medication she'd managed her bewildered grief.
She knew. What if. Her son
would have been as dangerous and endangered as Shan, and very probably
as dead. And who might have felt obliged to kill him in case he proved
a risk? And what sort of life would he have had, isolated as a
biohazard?
Lindsay walked out.
There was sanctuary in the maze of plant beneath Umeh
Station. She'd put her name down on the rota to dose the feeder tank
for the hydroponics system, recycling nutrients from the rapidly
growing supply of human waste. It was a sudden hard lesson in ecology.
There was adequate water and power, but beyond what could be grown in
this biodome there was no food, and the mission hadn't planned to
accommodate a hundred extra people on the ground. It was a damn shame
that they hadn't had time to unload all of Actaeon's
supplies before the ship was hit.
She went back to the sewage processing plant and
climbed down the ladder to the service ducts and machinery spaces. So
this was what they were planning to build on Bezer'ej when Actaeon
set out from Earth twenty-six years ago.
It was just as well the isenj had chosen to make space for it on Umeh;
the wess'har would have blown it into orbit for daring to intrude on
the landscape.
Among the pipe runs and filter housings there was no
smell apart from new plastic, but the thought of circulating feces was
a psychological deterrent for most. A musical rhythm thrummed in the
quiet motors and intermittent rush of fluid from pipe to pipe, as
soothing as a Zen garden in its way. Lindsay leaned on one of the
separation tanks and rested her forehead on the cool surface.
Poor bloody bezeri. She
couldn't imagine a species so fragile and so localized that fallout
would devastate it, but she had to accept that was the price she'd paid
without thinking. Why did they pick that chain of islands to spawn in?
Why didn't they spread around the planet?
Bloody stupid squid.
She wasn't a monster. She knew
she wasn't. But now she was wondering what monsters really were. She
was so preoccupied with the fear that she might no longer know what was
right and decent that the insistent gurgling of her stomach caught her
unawares.
It was time to eat. Her stomach was gnawing its way out
again, objecting to a meager diet of ten-day lettuce and beans when it
wanted plenty of fat and sugar.
"Boss?" said a woman's voice behind her.
"Sue?"
Webster stood with one hand on her belt and an
apologetic smile on her face. Lindsay thought she looked like the sort
of girl who teachers described as "helpful." But she had her ESF670
rifle slung on her webbing and she hadn't earned a green beret for
being helpful.
"It's time," she said. "You knew this was coming,
didn't you?"
"I did." But she was still suddenly scared. And she
wanted to run. "Oh God."
"Let's walk out of here with a bit of dignity, shall
we?"
"And Rayat?"
"Leave him to Mart."
"He's not going to slime his way out of this, is he?"
"I don't think so."
Lindsay walked out and Webster followed behind. If the
marine could take this with equanimity, then so could she. She wondered
how the wess'har might settle the score and knew that whatever they
did, it would be fast and efficient, which suddenly turned out to be
little comfort.
She really didn't want to die.
Webster kept right behind her as she climbed the access
ladder to ground level and walked through the dome to the entrance. She
looked around to see who had come for them. Ussissi or isenj? Nobody
going about their business in the dome was behaving as if anyone
unexpected had entered.
"Where are they?" asked Lindsay.
And then she saw Rayat. There was something wrong--more
wrong than being taken away by alien troops for some unspecified death.
Barencoin and Becken were frog-marching Rayat towards the door. Small
knots of crew and contractors stood aside to let the men pass, staring
and doing double takes.
Rayat's shocked white face said pain.
As he came within a few meters of Lindsay, she could see he wasn't just
being forced to the door: from the angle of his arms, his wrists were
cuffed behind his back.
"Ready?" said Barencoin. "We haven't got much of a
window. She didn't put up a fight, then?"
"I just asked nicely," said Webster.
Lindsay turned just as she realized that Webster wasn't
accompanying her. She was arresting her.
Nice, capable, helpful Webster held her rifle in both hands now.
"Come on, Boss," she said. "I've got to hand you over
in one piece. Don't do anything daft."
"And what about you? What do you think they're going to
do to you? You think being at the bottom
of the command pile will stop the wess'har coming for you too?"
"Yeah," said Barencoin. "So far, it has."
Rayat stumbled. Barencoin had hold of his collar.
Lindsay was right behind them, Webster's rifle in her back. All she
could think of right then was that she was hungry and that she hadn't
had time to go to the toilet. When it came to it, she was as reluctant
to face death as she had been on Bezer'ej, when she was so convinced
that she was prepared to blow her grenades and take Shan Frankland with
her.
You don't have the guts.
She would never erase Shan's rebuke. The woman's
contempt for anyone with less reckless courage than herself was an
ever-present toxin weakening Lindsay at every turn. Shan Frankland
certainly knew how to haunt you.
"I think I'll hand you over to Ade," Barencoin told
Rayat. "He could do with a laugh."
"Discipline doesn't take long to fall apart, does it?"
said Rayat. "I'm an officer of your government. I was acting legally."
"Technically, so were we, but we still got ours and now
you're going to get yours."
"Think of it as peacekeeping," said Becken. He slipped
on his breather mask as they stepped through the airlock. An isenj
ground transport swept up to the entrance and Lindsay found herself
pushed flat onto its floor, Rayat landing with a thud beside her.
"It's worth it if I see you go first, you bastard," she
said.
"Where are we going?"
"Shut it," said Barencoin, and put his boot flat on
Rayat's cheek. "And keep your bloody heads down."
"Why?" Lindsay just thought riot.
The isenj blamed them. They'd riot if they saw them. There was a
ussissi driving and it didn't turn to look at them.
"I said shut it."
She inhaled a scent of damp forest. She knew that
smell, too: there was an isenj in the vehicle.
"I regret the drama," said Minister Ual's voice. "But
this is more to protect me from my own people's reaction than to
prevent your escape."
"Where are you taking us?" asked Rayat.
"F'nar."
"You don't have jurisdiction over us."
"I'm simply carrying out your government's wishes." Ual
suddenly leaned over them like a collapsing Christmas tree, glittering
with royal blue beads. "My problem is simply that I am not carrying out
the wishes of my own."
Nevyan found it hard to keep the news of Shan's
survival to herself. Secrecy was a very unwess'har thing. Her husbands
had known why she had left in a hurry, and now they wanted to know what
had been done with the remains. Humans had strange rituals. There was a
certain curiosity about a species that preferred to hide its dead. But
they were gethes, carrion-eaters: so they
did such things.
Secrecy was unimportant now that Shan was safe on
Wess'ej. The news reached most of F'nar before midday.
Giyadas insisted on seeing the human who had come back
from the dead. The isanket led her
stepmother by the hand along the terraces, tugging with
uncharacteristic impatience. Nevyan remembered to knock on the door.
Human territorial privacy was a difficult concept to grasp.
"Is she recovering?" she asked.
"We think so." Aras was mixing something in a bowl that
smelled full of evem. "Her temperature is
very high, which is a good sign that c'naatat
is modifying her. She's still not conscious."
"May we see her?"
"She owes her life to your persistence. She would be
glad to know you were here."
Ade was sitting beside the bed with a piece of what the
gethes called smartpaper, a data storage
medium that was a thin white sheet of fabric. He was reading aloud from
it but he stopped when he realized Nevyan was standing in the doorway.
"Just in case she can hear," said Ade, clearly
embarrassed. "Barrack Room Ballads."
Shan didn't look peaceful. She looked agonized and ill,
and there was a transparent tube taped to her cheek and extending into
her nose. But she didn't look as horrific as when Nevyan had first seen
her. The bones in her face seemed less prominent and her skin was
flushed pink.
Giyadas stared at the tube, hands tightly clasped. "What's that for?"
"For putting food directly into her stomach," said Ade. "She can't
swallow properly."
"She must have been very frightened. Will her hair grow
again?"
He ran a fingertip over Shan's scalp. "It's already
growing. I can feel it."
It was hard to think of her as she had once been. Even
though Shan was shorter than most matriarchs, Eddie had referred to her
as a strapping girl, a tall and athletic
female by human standards. It was also hard to imagine that she had
survived in the vacuum of space and returned with any scrap of life in
her at all.
Eddie wandered in and joined the solemn contemplation.
He leaned closer and looked into her face. "Come on, you old bag," he
said. "I bet you can hear me. Come on. Get up and take a swing at me.
Stop slacking."
"Why do you say things you don't mean?" asked Giyadas.
"Because it's easier than getting upset because she
looks so awful."
Ade exuded a strong scent of agitation. He fidgeted
with the smartpaper, clearly annoyed at the interruption. "I don't
think she'd enjoy being a spectator sport."
"That's my cue," said Eddie, and walked out.
C'naatat had turned out
to be even more extraordinary than Nevyan had imagined. She understood
why it provoked such extreme reactions in humans; they were solitary
creatures, competitive rather than cooperative, and c'naatat
had all the makings of a very desirable
military advantage. What it meant to individuals also set on avoiding
the natural progression of life she could only imagine. Their ability
to close their eyes to what would happen to the world outside their
heads constantly amazed her.
And yet there were humans like Shan and--she dared think
it--Lindsay Neville who went to extreme lengths to stop it becoming
available to their own kind.
"Where are her lights?" asked Giyadas.
Nevyan looked carefully at Shan's hands for signs of
the bioluminescence she had once displayed, a legacy of the bezeri.
Shan hadn't been sure quite how c'naatat
had managed to collect that genetic material, and it had distressed her
at first. Giyadas had found it fascinating.
Ade took one of Shan's hands and turned it over
carefully. He could touch her with impunity; he was already
contaminated. "Nothing yet," he said. "They might come back when she's
better."
"There are others who wish to visit," said Nevyan
carefully. "My mother."
"I'm sure Shan would love to see Mestin. When she's
awake."
"Very well. I understand."
"Please don't think I'm being ungrateful, ma'am. You
found her and we owe you everything. But Shan wouldn't like too many
people to see her in this state."
Humans were obsessed with appearance. Nevyan noted his
use of the word we. "A considerate
thought, Ade Bennett."
He gave her an awkward smile without any display of
teeth and went on reading. Nevyan wondered how this odd narrative about
soldiers in ancient Earth wars might be of comfort to Shan, but there
was a great deal she didn't know about her yet, nor about Ade Bennett.
Eventually Aras came in with the bowl of liquid food and more tubing.
Ade put down the smartpaper and stood up.
"Let's leave Aras to it, shall we?" He ushered Nevyan
and Giyadas to the doorway.
Nevyan knew she could do nothing further for Shan but
she waited anyway, watching Giyadas interrogate Eddie on the nature of
human secrecy. Ade, incongruously alien in his landscape-patterned
battle clothing, polished his boots with rhythmic strokes. Eddie said
he didn't need to polish them at all, but he did it anyway. His weapon
was propped by his seat.
"So does everyone know she's back?" asked Eddie.
"I imagine so." Nevyan waited for disapproval, knowing
Eddie's attitude to information, but none came. "Have you told the
other soldiers?"
Ade shrugged. "Haven't seen them to tell them. I bet
Izzy and Chaz have told the others about me, though. Haven't had a
message from them in days."
It didn't matter who knew now. There was nothing the gethes
could do to take c'naatat,
and nobody else wanted it.
"Does c'naatat think?"
asked Ade.
Nevyan considered the idea and wasn't sure if it
disturbed her. "I don't know. It seems to make decisions, but I don't
know if it's aware of its host's feelings any more than we're aware of
this planet. It merely treats it kindly, as do we."
"See, we'd want to find that out." Ade considered the
degree of shine on his boots and seemed to find it wanting. The
polishing gathered speed. "Back home, they'd want to take it apart and
find out all about it."
"We don't feel the need to."
Ade seemed satisfied with the answers for a while and
sank back into the rhythm of polishing. "How did it keep her going?
What was she like when you found her?"
Nevyan cocked her head. "She was covered in a
transparent substance. I assume it offered some protection while c'naatat
kept her in suspension."
Eddie was checking something on his little fabric
screen. He made uh-uh sounds as if
understanding something he had not understood before. "Some organisms
can go dormant and survive in space. Haloarcula
can. So can Synechococcus. Look." He
offered Nevyan the screen. "They can form a coating. Neat."
"And valuable," said Ade. "The top brass would be very
interested in that. The more shit you throw
at c'naatat, the tougher its host gets."
"Nietzsche," said Eddie. "He said that which does not
kill me--"
"Yeah, I know who Nietzsche was, thanks."
"I wasn't inferring that you didn't."
Ade's jaw muscles clenched and he went on polishing,
eyes cast down. Giyadas was transfixed by the spectacle.
"You're a species that likes to keep busy," she said.
Eddie laughed, showing every sign of doting on the isanket.
The tension subsided again.
After a while Ade paused and cocked his head, then
slipped his boots back on and reached for his rifle very casually, as
if he was going to subject it to the same cleaning ritual as the rest
of his equipment.
Eddie paused. "What's up, Ade?"
Ade shook his head. But he stood to one side of the
door, and as it opened he lunged forward and knocked the visitor off
his feet. His rifle was hard against Shapakti's head in one movement.
"Fucking well knock," said
Ade, face flushed. "You can get your head blown off that way." He eased
his weapon away from Shapakti's head and hauled him up by his clothing.
"Like this." Ade opened the door and rapped his fist against it. "Knock
knock. Hello? Come in. Understand?"
"Wow," said Eddie. "Is that an Eqbas?"
Aras appeared in the doorway of Shan's room. "I'll
explain to him. Shapakti hasn't learned enough English yet."
"I'll teach him," said Giyadas. "I can do it."
Shapakti warbled in the odd mix of eqbas'u and wess'u
he seemed to be developing with Aras. Nevyan could follow it more
easily now. "This gethes is dangerous. Why
does he hate me?"
"He thinks you're ambushing him," said Aras. "Humans
have private spaces. And they don't like being observed excreting or
reproducing. This is why we have doors inside this house as well."
"Are the females aggressive? What about the female c'naatat?
We had no idea the organism was so
persistent. Can we--"
"You will leave my isan
alone."
"Esganikan is very curious about her condition."
"Esganikan can wait."
Nevyan intervened. But she shared Aras's anxiety: the
Eqbas had suddenly become intensely curious about c'naatat's
characteristics rather than its control. Shapakti smelled excited.
"Shan Chail will tear
you up for arse paper if you irritate her,"
said Nevyan, hoping she'd recalled the phrase correctly. "Why have you
come here?"
Shapakti appeared to grasp the broad meaning. "To
inform you that there is a vessel on a direct approach from Umeh."
"The ussissi fly shuttles between worlds all the time."
"This one carries an isenj minister with two gethes
prisoners. He wishes to talk to Nevyan."
Nevyan looked at Eddie, whose gaze was darting between
Aras and Shapakti as if trying to follow the conversation. "What's up?"
he asked. "Look, can I talk to this guy? Can someone interpret for me?"
Nevyan ignored the request. Eddie could do as he
wished; she didn't understand why he always asked permission. "Ual
seems to be delivering Neville and Rayat personally," she said. "Your
diplomatic mission was successful."
"I knew he'd keep his side of the bargain," said Eddie,
gaze still locked on Shapakti.
"There is no bargain," said Nevyan.
The ussissi pilot made a conspicuous point of
bringing his vessel to a halt a thousand kilometers outside wess'har
space. He eased himself out of his seat and peered over the back of it
at his passengers.
"This is as far as I go without explicit landing
clearance from F'nar."
Ual hadn't enjoyed his first experience of space flight
at all. Zero gravity was terrifying. Fragments of quills broken by his
free-fall collisions crisscrossed the grille across the air vent, and
he wondered how ussissi tolerated so much time between planets. Ralassi
was actually eating something, drifting a little against his
restraints, utterly unconcerned.
"Call F'nar again," said Ual. "Invite them to board to
carry out security checks."
The three human soldiers were actually dozing. Ual
found that degree of serenity extraordinary, but they behaved as if
this was as commonplace for them as it was for the ussissi. It probably
was. Mohan Rayat was reading from a small square object. Considering
his predicament, he didn't appear appropriately distressed either.
But Lindsay Neville was agitated. She fidgeted,
rearranging her collar. She had hardly spoken throughout the journey
and odd sounds were coming from her body, liquid gurgling sounds. Ual
turned and looked at her, alarmed that she might be about to spawn
young.
"That's my stomach," she said. "I haven't eaten in
twenty-four hours. Do wess'har feed prisoners?"
The ussissi didn't look up from the console. "They
don't take prisoners at all."
"I regret the discomfort," said Ual. "It makes little
difference in the end, though."
"You're a callous bastard, sir."
"You seem to forget that I might disapprove of your
action on Bezer'ej for reasons other than the diplomatic embarrassment
it causes us. Isenj don't engage in wanton destruction."
Ralassi held out his hand, offering whatever snack he
was devouring, but it seemed not to appeal to Lindsay despite her claim
of great hunger. She looked away and there was no sound except the
various hums and rattles of the hull and the ussissi pilot's
high-pitched conversation with F'nar.
His chatter stopped. He seemed surprised.
"This is not encouraging," said the pilot.
"Told you so," said Lindsay. "This is where they shoot
first and worry about hand-over negotiations later."
"F'nar isn't replying to my message," said the pilot. "This is the
commander of an Eqbas vessel standing off our stern. She
asks us to cut our drive and allow her vessel to take us inboard."
Ual had to think about that request for a few seconds
to make sense of it.
"What Eqbas vessel?"
"The one that has just made itself known to us."
Ual had known they were coming, but the reality of
arrival--and the speed--was a shock. "I had expected the wess'har to
board us."
"Unless I have misunderstood the ussissi on board, the
commander means to take this entire vessel
inboard."
Ual had planned to admit a boarding party as an act of
good faith. "Are you correct?"
"She said vessel." The
ussissi beckoned him forward. "Minister, look at this display. This is
a hazard system." He passed a hand across a smooth white surface and
shapes welled up from it, three-dimensional and subtly colored. "It
detects objects and hazards. The small object here
is us."
There was a bead-sized lump on the surface. Close to it
was a curved raised area that ran off the edge of the screen. Lindsay
edged up behind Ual to look.
"That is the Eqbas vessel,"
said the ussissi.
"Oh shit," said Lindsay.
Ual began to wonder if he had made a very grave error
of judgment. But perhaps it didn't matter which wess'har nation he met
first; one thing he did know about wess'har--from both his ancient
memory and his own experience--was that they meant what they said.
Humans didn't.
"Follow the Eqbas commander's instructions," said Ual.
Targassat taught
us that a minimal life-style is a prudent one, not only because it is
right but because it is pragmatic. If you require little, then hardship
will present no challenge to you; you will survive. The history of the
gethes confirms this. Without the trappings of civilization they
believe they must have, they degenerate into chaos. Their pursuit of
excess destroys them and their world. Unfortunately, Earth is not their
world alone.
SIYYAS BUR
matriarch historian of F'nar
She could see lights. She could see red
and green and gold and violet and something she didn't have a name for.
She didn't even have a name for herself or a sense of
her shape or substance. But she could see.
She could taste something familiar yet alien, earthy,
alive, and then it was gone again. She was moving fast through water.
Then she was on dry land, tight-packed with others she knew, enveloped
in familiar smells and dryness. And then she was looking down on black
grass.
It was all familiar and yet completely strange. She
wasn't afraid any more. She simply had a sense of urgency.
She had to do something.
The things she could see and feel and taste were inside, but
she couldn't define how: they just
were. There was nothing outside. She was
vaguely aware of the form of herself, but she couldn't feel anything
that told her where she ended and the rest of the universe began.
Then she could see, and she was aware that what she saw
was something outside; a brilliantly clear
night sky without horizon. Its clarity was impossible. For a few
moments--and she had no idea how long those were--she couldn't make
sense
of it.
When she did, she wished she hadn't.
It was indeed a sky; but it was an infinite field of
stars, and she was in it. She tried to
turn to look over her shoulder but she couldn't move. Animal panic
began to rise from the pit of her stomach and something said get a
grip and she tried to control her
breathing.
Then she realized something.
She wasn't breathing.
When Shan opened her eyes again, the star field
was gone.
She was clear who she was, and for some reason she was
very pleased about that. Warm, soft fabric touched her palms. Something
appetizingly spicy wafted on the air.
I'm Detective Superintendent
Shan Frankland, Environmental Hazard Division. For a moment she
wondered if she'd overslept and she tried to remember what shifts she
was working that week, and then she recalled that she hadn't worked
shifts since… since…
She tried to reach out for her swiss.
"She's not breathing. Fuck it, she's not
breathing."
Oh shit.
I'm not on Earth. I'm
twenty-five light-years away. I've got a parasite. I'm not--
There was something in her nose; no, it was in her
throat, and she tried to swallow. Whatever it was, it hurt like hell. A
tube? Sod that. She grabbed it
instinctively and pulled, feeling something rip from her face and
scrape the back of her throat. She gagged. Her stomach rebelled. She
rolled to the edge of the bed and vomited.
Someone took her shoulders. She tried to push them away
out of embarrassment but she couldn't. A voice was calling, "Get Aras!
Now!" and she still struggled to get that damn thing out of her mouth.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, steady."
A man held her down--yes, she could smell it was a male, it was all
flooding back--and the tube pulled clear of her throat with a painful
jerk. "There. All gone now. Take it easy."
She was staring down at her stomach contents. "I don't
remember eating that," she said, but her voice cracked. The face
looking down at her was one she knew. She just couldn't place it.
"Sorry… sorry…"
"Don't you worry about that, Boss. Do you know where
you are? Do you know me?"
She had to think about it. It took a while. He wiped
her face with a cold wet cloth.
"Ade?"
"Well done, Boss. Yes, It's Ade. How do you feel?"
I had a row with you. Her
skin burned. "Too hot."
"Let's clean you up."
It was more than a row.
She'd hit him, shot him, something like that. "Sorry… what's wrong with
me?" She couldn't understand why tears were streaming down his face.
Maybe she was coming round from a major anaesthetic, although she
couldn't imagine why. She knew she said stupid, embarrassing things
when she was regaining consciousness even though they sounded sensible
at the time. Shut up. "Can I have a cup of
tea? Sorry I threw up."
"You throw up just as much as you want. Hold still."
She felt the sudden chill as he took the cover off her and a lovely
iridescent white one went in its place. Dhren.
She recognized that. "Yeah, you bet you can have a cup of tea."
Then she managed to concentrate on her hands and
forearms. They didn't look like hers. They were just bone. "Oh God,
what's happened? What's--"
"It's okay… sshh … sshh…"
He put his hand on her shoulder and she
wanted to shake it off, but she couldn't. "You're home now."
"Jesus, look at the state of me." She struggled to put
her hand to her head. Where's my hair? She
could see her own outline under the dhren
but she was just peaks of bone, nothing at all. "How long have I been
out?"
"Don't you worry about that. You just rest."
A wonderful scent like sandalwood hit her, rich and
oily, and she knew instantly who had entered the room and what he meant
to her. The memory was vivid, clear, and shocking.
"Aras. Aras."
"Isan." There was that hint
of an alien double-tone resonance in his voice. She looked up into the
face of a creature that was almost human but still reminded her of a
heraldic beast. "Do you recognize me?"
"Course I do, you silly sod," she said. "Isn't some
bastard going to tell me what happened?"
"She's back all right," said a third male voice.
Eddie.
The gaps began filling in, first a couple of flash
frames and then a torrent of disjointed images: a shuttle cabin, farms,
a church window. She'd have to write them down. She'd have to get some
order restored. That was her job.
But few images kept returning. At first they were hazy.
But then she was absolutely certain about them, and she didn't like
them at all.
One was a painfully vivid memory of being slammed to
the cool gold ground of Constantine, meters underground yet bathed in
light, and being handcuffed. The other was of hearing a hatch close
behind her and seeing open, raw blackness speckled with impossibly
sharp stars filling her field of vision as the shuttle bay opened to
space and the escaping air tore past her.
I stepped out--
The pain of cold and vacuum was worse than she could
ever have imagined but she recalled it anyway, accurately enough to
make her gasp.
I'm dead oh God it hurts I can
still see oh God let me die let me die let me--
Aras Sar Iussan, the final thought in her mind as she
was dying, folded her in his arms and the comforting vibration rumbling
from his chest almost made the images fade.
"You're right," said Aras. "She's not breathing."
F'nar Plain, November 1,
2376.
The Eqbas ship was huge. Eddie didn't know much about
wess'har traffic control, but he could tell from the size and color of
the symbols on the projected screen that the target was a whopper. The
reactions of the wess'har around him confirmed it: they locked into
position and didn't even twitch, that freeze-and-wait reaction that was
typical when they were assessing a potential threat.
"When will we be able to see it?" said Eddie.
"Very soon," said Nevyan.
Nevyan's mother, Mestin, and the other senior
matriarchs of F'nar had gathered in the Exchange of Surplus Things to
watch the progress of the inbound vessel on the screens. Eddie had
always thought of them as unassailable military muscle but seeing them
transfixed by the arrival of the Eqbas worried him. He remembered
cowering beneath the shadow of huge wess'har ships as they swept over
Bezer'ej, feeling like a baffled caveman. And this vessel was a
magnitude greater than that.
The giant ship waited for clearance. Eddie had spent a
sobering hour looking through the images that Ual had given him,
pictures of the worlds where Eqbas Vorhi had intervened before; worlds
that were now orderly, and peaceful, and invaded.
The Eqbas could walk in whenever and wherever they wanted.
"Are you glad you're not running the show any more?" he
said.
Mestin blinked. "If you're asking if I have confidence
that Nevyan will handle this more effectively than I could, then yes.
She's far more dominant in a crisis. She has much more jask."
"Is it a crisis?"
"Wess'har are a cooperative species," she said. "But we
prefer this agrarian way of life, and it's evident they do not.
The adjustment may be disconcerting for
both."
Eddie wasn't sure if she was saying that the Eqbas
would have to get used to walking everywhere or that it was the end of
civilization as they knew it. He took out his bee cam and checked its
status. Giyadas watched his hands with the intensity of someone trying
to work out how a conjuring trick was done. It was one shot he couldn't
miss. He'd been denied two headlines of a lifetime--DISGRACED
HALF-ALIEN COP CHEATS CERTAIN DEATH, ALIEN
MINISTER KIDNAPS HUMAN WAR CRIMINALS--but he was buggered if he
was going to let this one pass by doing the decent thing.
Besides, Earth needed to know what was coming. It would
focus a few minds. He was clear about that now: he had done the right
thing--probably. Those riot scenes from Southern Africa wouldn't leave
his mind even when he tried to make them.
My fault. It's all my fault
again.
Nobody needed to walk far out onto the plain to see the
craft. Eddie heard it long before he saw it, a steady low-frequency
throbbing right on the threshold of his hearing that made the back of
his tongue itch. Then it dropped slowly through the cloud a good five
kilometers away, and it was colossal.
F'nar fell uncharacteristically silent.
"Holy shit," said Eddie. "And don't you dare repeat
that, Giyadas, you hear?"
Some shots didn't need commentary, and this was one of
them. The bronze ship hung in the sky and waited while the small party
of matriarchs approached. Then its airframe began to alter.
Eddie thought his eyesight was playing up; but the
outline wavered and the cylinder thinned at two points like a bubble of
hot blown glass being twisted by a craftsman, creating another bubble
on either flank. The belt of red and blue chevrons faded and then
reformed perfectly on each separate vessel.
Eddie was mesmerized. He'd seen ships and aircraft on
Earth that could separate into independent sections but the technology
was one of hydraulics and bulkheads: this sleight of engineering hand
appeared to be utterly fluid, even organic.
The bee cam recorded it faithfully. The Eqbas
cruiser--it helped Eddie to think of it in those terms--was now a large
ship with two escorts, two destroyers. The smaller sections drifted
away from the main section and rose out of sight through the clouds in
a tooth-shaking rumble. Where were they going? He'd ask.
"Well, this gets the top slot for the next bulletin,"
he said, as much for self-comfort as anything.
"Most impressive," said Nevyan. Giyadas clung to her
legs.
It was just a ship, a visiting ship. But it felt like
an invasion. If this was one routine vessel diverted simply because it
was closest to Wess'ej, he didn't want to think about what was waiting
on Eqbas.
The ship settled on the plain and the sound of its
drive dropped an octave as it powered down. The bee cam hovered,
motionless. Then a huge Eqbas stepped out of the airlock onto the ramp
and stood looking around before walking with an easy rolling gait
towards Nevyan.
It could only be a dominant matriarch. Her long
multi-jointed hands were clasped in a prayer-like grip as she walked
and a spectacular mane of tufted copper red hair extended in a line
down her forehead. Eddie was immediately put in mind of a muscular and
angry cockatoo. He didn't fancy asking her if she wanted a cracker.
"Esganikan Gai," said Nevyan.
"Big girl," said Eddie, awed. "Wow. Big
girl."
Esganikan, like all wess'har, didn't appear to know
much about personal space. She came close enough for him to smell her
slightly spicy breath and stared into his face, then looked to Nevyan
and trilled in a double-voice contralto. He could smell a pleasant
scent of fruit. Her ussissi aide, Aitassi, settled beside her.
"She greets you and says she has several more of these on
board," said Aitassi, indicating Eddie.
Nevyan trilled back and Esganikan cocked her head both
ways sharply. Eddie had never seen that before. He assumed Nevyan had
spoken eqbas'u and that her fluency had come as a surprise. Or maybe
she'd told Esganikan to watch her lip because she
was the boss woman round here; it was hard to tell with wess'har. But
at least neither of them had started throwing punches.
Esganikan turned towards the ship and more females
emerged, equally formidable, wearing ornately quilted knee-length
tunics in various shades of green and gray. There were males in the
crew, too. Eddie was struck by the fact that the gender split seemed
more equal. If there was one thing he had come to think of as normal on
Wess'ej, it was that there were many more males than females.
"Extraordinary," said Nevyan.
"I thought so too," said Eddie, and assumed they were
noticing the same thing.
"I thought you understood no eqbas'u."
"I don't."
"She said the detached craft had been sent to Bezer'ej
and Umeh."
"Blimey, they're not starting a war already, are they?"
"They'll carry out a reconnaissance of Umeh from orbit
and an environmental damage assessment on Bezer'ej. What did you
find extraordinary, then?"
"Lots of females," he said. "Didn't you?"
Nevyan made a head-rocking gesture like an Indian
dancer and didn't reply; Esganikan walked back to the ramp and waited,
warbling to someone inside the hatch.
Then Ual appeared on the brow and there was a
collective ssssss from the assembled
matriarchs of F'nar.
They froze. Then they tilted their heads, riveted. Ual
was the first isenj ever to set foot on Wess'ej, and Eddie let the bee
cam loose for posterity.
And right behind Ual was Lindsay Neville.
She trooped down the ramp with Rayat, herded by the
three marines, but Nevyan didn't react. Her eyes were on Ual. Out of
the context of his crowded but intensely orderly city, he looked
shockingly sinister.
But he's almost a friend. I like
him.
Eddie tried to steer Nevyan back to the subject of the
prisoners. "Beelzebub and his lovely assistant," he said helpfully,
nodding in their direction. Nevyan knew what a Royal Marine uniform
looked like so it should have been a simple process of elimination.
"What are you going to do with them for the time being?"
"Kill them," she said calmly. "What is Beelzebub?"
Oh boy. But this wasn't
Earth, and there were plenty of places back home where they would have
opted for summary execution with equal ease. It was none of his
business. "Just a name. Can I interview them first?"
"If you feel it might be useful."
Ual moved towards them with all the grace of a drinks
trolley with one broken wheel. Nevyan held out both arms and for one
awkward moment Eddie thought she might actually give this old enemy a
hug, but she was simply indicating that she was the one he had to talk
to. There was no reason for him to pick her out from a group of
apparently identical aliens.
"Thank you for not opening fire," he said, in perfect
but gasping English. "So this is where you choose to live, Mr.
Michallat. Matriarch Nevyan, you now have custody of the two humans."
Nevyan paused, perhaps baffled by the use of the
honorific matriarch. Wess'har weren't much
on protocol. "I hadn't expected you to bring the prisoners personally.
But if you think you will return with Aras Sar Iussan, we will never
hand him over."
"I realize that. The risk I've taken is not what will
happen to me here but what happens when I go home after defying my own
government."
"And empty-handed."
"That depends on what I came for."
"We don't bargain. You have nothing that we want."
"Ah, but you have something we
want."
Nevyan could do the silent routine as well as any
interviewer. She waited, gaze fixed. Eddie wondered at what point he
should do the diplomatic thing and break the impasse.
But Ual spoke at last. "I want a sustainable peace. I
want wess'har to come to Umeh to help us resolve our environmental
crisis."
Nevyan showed no shock or any emotion at all. Eddie, as
he always did at times of crisis, just let the bee cam keep rolling.
There was a loud thump of a body hitting
flagstones. It was hers. Shan was still having moments of not knowing
where she was in relation to her body.
"Sod it," she said. "Sod it, sod it, sod it."
She'd been so sure she could make it across the room to
the toilet. She tried to kneel and was surprised how suddenly easy it
was until she realized Aras had walked in and lifted her.
He scooped her up in his arms, laid her back on the bed
and wrapped her tightly in a blanket, hissing with annoyance.
"You're to call me when you want to get up," he said,
and put his hand on her chest. "You appear not to be breathing again."
No, she wasn't. C'naatat
had found some other mechanism in its box of tricks for oxygenating her
blood. She made a conscious effort to inhale and exhale, seeking the
primitive unthinking rhythm again. "I got out of the habit. No jokes
about breathing through my ears, okay? And I want to pee."
"I'll help you." He didn't seem to understand the joke. "You smell
extremely dominant, so you must be feeling better."
She sniffed the back of her hand. There was a scent of
mango with undertones of sawn wood. It was the wess'har pheromone that
signaled matriarchal aggression, jask,
powerful enough on occasions to make other females cede their authority
to her. She'd changed F'nar politics once before without realizing it.
This wasn't the time to be doing it again.
"I used to be able to control that," she said. "I
promise I won't depose any more isan've by
accident."
"You seem remarkably ebullient."
"I feel… okay."
Each time she shut her eyes and opened them again the
miracle of being alive and home was
fading. Aras's wonderful, mouth-filling sandalwood scent was the last
thing to pall. Hey, you're my old man. She
savored the elation of seeing again the one person who was in her
thoughts as she died, but the police officer within, the one she knew
had been there all her life, was telling her to calm down and get on
with the job.
Don't be such a fucking girl.
You didn't die. You're back. You're fine.
She wanted to surrender to tears and didn't know how. "I still need
the toilet."
"I'll help you."
"I can manage, thanks. I don't suppose lavatory
functions bother you, but they bother me." She paused at an
embarrassing thought. "Do they bother you?"
"If you're asking if we dealt with your bodily wastes
during your coma, we did not. You didn't excrete at all."
"It's your bedside manner I fell for," she said. "And
who's we?"
"Ade and myself."
Ade. Oh yes indeed, she
remembered Ade in detail now. She remembered, and she was waiting for
him to come back into the room. "Christ, were you selling bloody
tickets for the show?"
"Ade wanted to help. He's very distressed."
It was too late for that and it wasn't her condition
that was troubling her. It was the big gaps in her knowledge; she
didn't like gaps and she made a point of never having them. The absence
of knowledge was more than the irritating whisper of a Suppressed
Briefing. That, at least, let her know there really was some memory
drug-programmed into her subconscious even if she didn't know what it
was until some event triggered it. This was genuine oblivion.
The last thing she had done was to step out of the
shuttle's cargo bay, apparently months ago. Jesus
Christ, I really did it, didn't I? Now she was back on Wess'ej.
Apart from the brief moments of awful consciousness while she drifted
in the void, she didn't know what else had happened between the two
events.
But she remembered about Lindsay Neville detonating
nuclear devices on Ouzhari all right. Her recall of that was perfect.
"Where's Ade?"
"You said you wanted a cup of tea. He's gone to
Nevyan's home to get some from Eddie."
Ade was a good soldier and good soldiers followed
orders, including orders that said get these
bombs to Bezer'ej. She couldn't blame him for that. Lying on
the ground deep in Constantine, mind-numbing
pain in her legs and her guts, tape over her mouth, Ade threatening
Lindsay that he'd slot her if she didn't put the grenades down. Fuck
you, you shot Vijissi. Oh yes, she remembered it all right.
He'd stopped Lindsay killing her--really
killing her--with a grenade, so she owed him her life. It just didn't
feel that way. She remembered the impact of rounds sputtering into her
legs, her pelvis, knocking her down, punching through bone.
Later, girl. Take it easy. "Where's
Vijissi? Did they find him too?"
Aras shook his head.
"He wouldn't leave me. Mestin told him to stick with me
and he did, the poor little bastard."
Another friend gone, then, and she didn't have many. In
fact there was just Aras, because she hadn't yet come to terms with
Ade. Aras. She realized how precious he
was to her, and how the full sweet realization of that in her final
dying moment was being entombed forever behind her workaday
indifference. She didn't want to lose the feeling. She reached for it
desperately; it started to slip away. She panicked, clutching at it
like a key falling into deep water.
"I know I should say something really significant."
"Isan, I wish you would
rest."
"You were my final thought." It
was your last few seconds and you'd have given anything to tell him you
loved him. Now you can't even say the fucking word out loud. "I
didn't tell you how I felt."
It just never came out the way it should. Perhaps she
really didn't have any normal human feelings, just like Lindsay had
said. She wanted Aras's unerring gift for saying what he felt, and
being able to feel in the first place.
Aras did that canine head-tilt, and she knew exactly
which part of her was the hard-arsed copper who found his openness and
courage utterly disarming, and which was wess'har, altered by c'naatat
and bonded to him biologically through oursan.
"I was never offended," he said. "I know you're not a
demonstrative person."
"Do you want me to say it?"
"When you feel ready." He ran his palm over her scalp.
Her hand followed his: the stubble felt like someone had given her a
buzz cut. "Your c'naatat needs feeding.
See how fast it restores you."
"I'm starving. I could eat a scabby cat with piles."
"I recall that was your requested menu last time you
were injured," he said. He could approximate a human smile, but he
never showed his teeth. "I have more appetizing solid food."
"Bathroom," she said. She wanted to ask him why he
wasn't more excited to see her alive but perhaps it was the shock. You
couldn't just snap out of bereavement. She had to give him time. "C'naatat's
definitely working overtime."
She let him carry her to the toilet door and she shut
herself in, still draped in the blanket because she couldn't bear to
look at her own body. The toilet bowl was handsome aquamarine glass
shot with deliberate bubbles and flaws, a work of art that deserved
better appreciation than the steady assault of waste. Wess'har were
master glassmakers and a generous but anonymous individual had made the
bowl and cistern to a design provided by Constantine colony. Shan
pulled the flush. The water swirled.
Constantine was gone too.
She remembered preparing the colony for evacuation.
Three paces outside the toilet, her legs buckled again. Aras rushed to
pick her up but she waved him away, panting. She crawled on all fours,
frustrated to be helpless, but she felt… better, hungry and optimistic,
strength and energy building in her. Sweat stung her eyes: c'naatat
was burning her up, stoking her
metabolism and making up for lost time.
It didn't quite get her as far as the bed, though. She
got to her knees but it was one effort too many and Aras had to lift
her onto the mattress.
"I'm glad we don't have any mirrors," she said. She
could see the pity on his face and his un-wess'har reluctance to meet
her eyes. "I look like hell, don't I? Okay, don't answer that. Tell me
what I've missed."
"What do you remember?"
"Everything." C'naatat
didn't believe in the blissful erasure that normally went with serious
trauma. It spared her nothing. "Right up to the time I stepped out--"
She stopped. "I had Lindsay Neville. I
swear I put a round through the bitch but she was wearing a vest. She did
detonate the bombs, didn't she?"
"She did."
"And Bezer'ej? The colony? Why Eddie and Ade are here?"
"Perhaps you should wait until you're feeling stronger,
isan."
"Well, that's guaranteed to pique my curiosity. My
brain's strong enough, thanks. Tell me."
Aras made that long, slow hiss of annoyance. "The
devices were salted with cobalt."
Shan wasn't a scientist but she'd worked in EnHaz long
enough to have a good grasp of the league table of biohazards. "Shit."
"The area is heavily contaminated. We've yet to find
any bezeri who aren't dead or dying." Aras shut his eyes. "Nevyan
ordered the destruction of Actaeon. And
the World Before has now sent two vessels to our aid, with others to
follow."
Oh God. There was only so
much you could take in at one sitting. "Where's Lin now?"
Aras didn't answer. It wasn't a good sign. He still had
that blisteringly frank wess'har habit of saying the first thing that
came into his head so anything that interrupted the unedited flow had
to be serious. It meant he didn't want to upset her: it also meant he
knew she might do something extreme if she knew where Lindsay was, and that
told her either the bitch was accessible or
she had escaped.
But where the hell could anyone escape out here?
"I'll make your meal," he said, and left.
She fumed. A few minutes later Ade appeared with the
promised mug of tea. He spent an inordinate amount of time turning it
in his hands, looking like a man trying to find the right words.
"Come here," she said, trying very hard to choke down
anger that for once had no specific target. Ade edged towards her.
Something inside her was burning to be out, to get at him, to…
"Boss," he said. He was standing over her, turning the
mug in his hand. "Boss, I…"
Shan gathered what strength she had and brought her
right fist up hard, smashing the mug from his hands and sending it
shattering on the floor. He stepped back, mouth open in the formation
of some excuse that she didn't want to hear. She'd rarely lost control,
ever. Now she abandoned herself to rage.
"You bastard," she hissed. "You bastard,
you fucking well let her get me, you fucking well--" She slumped half
out of the bed, spent by the effort. Adrenaline consumed her. Then it
ebbed and faded, and she was left panting, hanging off the edge of the
mattress. Ade went to lift her. "Fuck off--fuck off out of my sight,
you
bastard--"
Aras slammed open the door and was between them in
three strides.
"Enough! Go, Ade. Leave her. And you, isan,
you will calm down, do you hear?"
Ade's face was stricken, devastated. He froze for a
moment and then strode out, crunching over broken glass.
Aras lifted her back onto the pillows and she accepted
his hand on her forehead. He slipped into a characteristic infra-sonic
rumbling, the kind wess'har fathers emitted to comfort a fretting
child, and shame washed over her along with the profound and
irresistible feeling of warm heaviness.
You lost it. Where's your
discipline? You never lost it out there.
Get a grip.
In an instant, she wanted both to beg Ade's forgiveness
and to kick the shit out of him for helping useless, make-believe
officer Lindsay fucking Neville transport bombs to Bezer'ej and force
her to space herself.
"I don't think I handled that well," she said at last.
Aras's comforting rumble trailed off into silence. "Did
you fire first, or did Ade?"
Perfect wess'har recall dredged up the exact sequence
of events on Constantine with an unflinching accuracy that her human
memory once struggled to achieve. She was looking down at Lindsay,
rifle to her forehead.
"Maybe Ade, maybe Mart." It was almost instantaneous:
she could feel the trigger yielding under her finger, the first round
hitting her in the pelvis, her rifle discharging into Lindsay's
ballistic vest. "But I was putting one through Lindsay."
Aras ahrugged. "What would you have done if you were
Ade, or Mart Barencoin?"
Shan felt a flutter of regret in her stomach. If either
of them were as hard-trained as she was, then she knew: she would
have fired. It was an unthinking
reflex.
"And I fired back." She reached out for Aras's hand. "I
just went on autopilot."
"Well, then," said Aras. He never implied rebukes--he
would chide her respectfully--but his reasonable tone was as good as
one. "And there's more you need to know."
"Is this going to piss me off even more?"
"Perhaps." He slid his arm round her shoulders and
leaned his forehead against hers. "I hardly know how to tell you."
"Try me. You know you can tell me anything."
He took his time. She waited.
"I killed Josh."
She almost asked him how it felt to kill a former
friend. Then she realized she knew already, even if Lindsay had
survived the attempt.
It was all too bloody easy.
"Well, serves the bastard right." Josh had taken
Lindsay and Rayat to Christopher Island--Ouzhari--knowing
they planned to deploy ERDs. He had his own pious logic. She hoped he
had his excuses ready for his god. "But I'm bloody sorry for you,
sweetheart."
Aras straightened up. "There are other matters, too."
"Are we getting near the end of the list or what?"
"Perhaps I should let Ade explain. He insisted that he
should. Will you promise to hear him out this time?"
"Okay."
Shan had been pretty sure she knew Ade. Reliable,
decent, sensible: a solid sergeant, the sort that every army--and
police
force--was built upon. He did his duty, even when politicians wanted
him
to do stupid, dangerous things, and even when it meant shooting her.
She had come perilously close to sleeping with him but--as
always--discipline and the prospect of his bioscreen broadcasting the
event to the rest of the marines stopped her.
Bioscreen.
She hadn't noticed the green light in his palm this
time. Maybe he'd deactivated it. "So he knew about the bombs."
"None of them knew about the cobalt except Rayat. No,
Ade now finds himself in a very difficult position."
"He deserted?" No insignia.
She could still take in every detail without thinking. Hey, I'm
back. "Is that why he removed his
stripes?"
"He surrendered," said
Aras. "He had no choice. You… you infected him, isan.
You injured him. Do you remember?"
Crack. Her head smashed
into the bridge ofAde's nose as he tried to pin her down. She
remembered that. But Lindsay had checked her out. She hadn't found a
break in her skin. Useless cow.
"Don't be hard on him," said Aras. "He fed you when
Nevyan brought you back. He read to you. He is utterly devoted to your
welfare, whatever has happened."
Shan shut her eyes.
"Shit," she said. "Oh shit."
The Respected
Minister has exceeded his authority. We now have no collateral with
which to bargain for the return of Aras Sar Iussan. There are those who
say we invest too much concern in ancient war crimes when there are
more immediate crises, but there is also the matter of national honor,
and having thrown that away, Minister Ual should answer for it.
MINISTER
PAR SHOMEN
EIT,
speaking at an emergency session of the Northern Assembly
"That," said Rayat, "is exquisite."
Lindsay saw the wall of shimmering white pearl as they
passed the edge of the inland cliff. She wasn't sure what she was
looking at and then her perspective kicked in and resolved it into the
concave bowl of a vast amphitheater.
F'nar looked even more shockingly unreal than it did in
Eddie's reports. It seemed more bizarre, more organic, as if aliens had
found a book on Antonio Gaudi's architecture and had a stab at making
it their own vernacular style. It was almost captivating enough to
divert her from the realization that she had an unspecified but very
short time left to live.
"Yeah, lovely," she muttered, and followed Mart
Barencoin's broad back. He still had that habit of looking around and
then walking backwards for a few paces as if he was still on patrol.
"Where are we going? I didn't think they had prisons or police stations
here."
"We do not, Lindsay Neville," said a ussissi voice. "You will go to
the Exchange of Surplus Things, unless a clan is
willing to accommodate you. But that depends when they execute you. An
overnight stay might not be necessary."
She glanced down. She had difficulty telling ussissi
apart, distinguishing them only by their taste in bandoleer-type belts
of bright fabric or beaded embroidery.
"Are you Ralassi?" she asked.
"Idiot," said the ussissi. "I'm Serrimissani. I'm a
female. Ralassi is male. No wonder your species is doomed."
"It's a pleasure to meet you, too."
"I once worked with Ual. I now work with Nevyan."
Lindsay noted she used the word with,
not for. "I thought we'd be dead as soon
as we stepped off the ship."
"That would be normal procedure. But there is
information required first."
"About what?"
"Culpability. Technology. Whatever the Eqbas require."
Serrimissani certainly spoke excellent English. That
didn't comfort Lindsay one bit. She kept her head up as she walked, but
this didn't feel like being a prisoner of war. She now had no sense of
being on the right side and just unfortunate to be captured: she felt
like a criminal. She had always wondered why captives didn't try to
escape, why those herded into prison camps never rose and overthrew
their guards, and now she knew. Docility in the face of threatening
authority was an automatic response. There were very few Shan
Franklands in the human species.
But Lindsay knew she was responsible for something
terrible, and the wess'har were right. She had to take the blame.
The wess'har she passed simply glanced at her. There
were no stones thrown or abuse hurled.
"They're very restrained," said Rayat.
"Shan always said chilled or
punching. This is chilled." Barencoin glanced over his shoulder
at her as if to shut her up. "I think we all know what punching is
going to be like."
"And yet you're not on their wanted list, Mr.
Barencoin," said Rayat.
Barencoin walked on, oblivious. Jon Becken, right
behind them, responded for him. "Yeah, it's our boyish good looks and
smart uniforms. Everyone loves a Royal Marine."
"We had friends in high places," said Webster.
At the Exchange of Surplus Things--a big hall with
doorless side rooms and absolutely no trappings of grandeur--Ual and
Eddie stood talking like old chums while Nevyan and Esganikan watched
them with that odd display of head tilting. Wess'har wandered in and
out with crates and mesh bags of unrecognizable produce, pausing to
stare at the activity in the main hall, but it seemed more curiosity
than anger. The place smelled of soil and sandalwood and indefinable
vegetable scents. Lindsay felt that she was standing trial in a
supermarket.
Serrimissani broke from the discussion and scuttled
towards Lindsay, but she slid in between her and Rayat, cutting out the
scientist like a sheepdog. "Do you have virin've?
Communications devices? If so, we require them."
"Yes." Rayat hesitated but Lindsay held out hers. There
was no harm they could do with them. "There you go."
"What do you want it for?" said Rayat.
"To determine culpability," said Serrimissani.
Rayat stared down at Serrimissani and she drew back her
lips ever so slightly, just enough to reveal a mouthful of close-packed
little teeth. He fumbled in his jacket and pulled out his handheld. She
took it and he flinched when her paw brushed his hand.
Rayat looked at Lindsay and shrugged. "A show trial,
perhaps?"
"Not their style. And they're not taking them because
they think we're going to call in air support."
Serrimissani and Aitassi were conferring, brandishing
the two handhelds while Eddie watched the exchange with a slight frown
of concentration. He didn't look her way, perhaps deliberately.
Esganikan Gai drew herself up and covered the ten meters to where
Lindsay and Rayat were sitting in a few strides. There was something
about her manner that reminded Lindsay of Shan, and that wasn't
reassuring.
She stared into Lindsay's face and then into Rayat's,
head tilting, pupils flaring and closing, and trilled. Serrimissani
trotted up beside her.
"She says she needs to understand who is to blame for
the events on Bezer'ej so that appropriate action may be taken--no
more,
no less."
Lindsay really didn't like wess'har eyes. It was the
way the four pupils constricted to a hairline cross: it made them look
like the blind voids of a statue's eyes, soulless and unfathomable. Her
interrogation resistance training enabled her to simply look through
the Eqbas, but it wasn't easy.
"That's simple enough," said Lindsay. There was nothing
else left to say. "It was me and him."
Esganikan warbled. Serrimissani appeared to be
struggling with the translation and summoned Aitassi. Eventually an
English version was extracted.
"She says that fact is not at issue," said
Serrimissani. "You did not bring weapons of this kind with you in Thetis.
So another generation was complicit. The
Eqbas need to know who authorized or ordered you to take these actions,
and then who took steps to right these wrongs, or did not, because they
must be held accountable when we reach Earth."
Reach Earth.
"But half the people you want to punish could be dead
and gone in twenty-five years' time," said Lindsay, hearing the words reach
Earth and desperate to shut out their true
meaning.
"Thirty years," said Serrimissani. "And what your
people do between now and then will be added to the reckoning."
Ade stood at the door, a new mug in his hand.
Shan swallowed her embarrassment and steeled herself
for an apology. Being wrong was easy, and so was admitting error. But
real regret--regret at lashing out at someone prepared to give their
life for you--was hard. She was sorry for very few things in her life,
but every one of them ate away at her.
Something in the back of her mind said she had done
something particularly unforgivable to Ade.
"So, you got me killed, and I gave you a dose," she
said, saving him the trouble of finding the first words. "I think we're
even." No, that wasn't good enough. "Okay. I started the shooting.
Sorry."
He looked up without raising his chin. After
twenty-five years of nicking guilty bastards she was utterly immune to
appealing contrition, even in a man she fancied, but he wasn't putting
it on.
"No, I'm sorry, Boss. If
you think you can hate me any more than I hate myself, you're wrong."
"If I hadn't been about to blow Lin's brains out, would
you have fired?"
Ade chewed his lip. "I don't know."
"Well, you stopped her turning me into hamburger. Even c'naatat
couldn't have put me back together
again after that." He was a good meter from her and clearly still too
scared to hand her the mug. Her voice sounded like an old woman's,
hoarse and cracking. "Shit, Ade, I'm sorry. I should never have said
those things to you."
"It's okay, Boss. I know you've been through hell." Hell.
She thought again about the moment the shuttle's bay
opened to space and she pushed herself off the edge of the coaming into
the most profound emptiness a human could conceive. The first minute of
dying had been hell, yes. They said you
could last maybe twelve seconds in space. But that was for regular
humans.
The brief episodes of consciousness that followed, with
no sense of duration or frequency, were far worse. She couldn't feel a
thing: she was isolated in her own head, a place she had never much
liked being. The blind, all-consuming panic when she opened her eyes
and realized where she was had been worse than the pain. She fought it.
Do your worst. You think you can
break me? I can handle this. I can do anything. Fuck you, I'm
going to stay sane because there's
nothing more you can do to me.
She remembered thinking that like a mantra; fuck
you, fuck you, fuck you. She realized she'd
been railing against God just in case she'd been wrong, and there
really was a deity out there somewhere to hear her contempt and
defiance. But there wasn't. There was just her, a scrap of dried meat
fueled by anger, and she'd still held on to her sense of self. And she
had come back. Nothing, absolutely nothing could ever
touch her inner core now.
"Want to talk?" asked Ade. "I mean, it--"
"Maybe later," she said. The detail could wait. "Not
yet."
"Okay."
"Is it true you looked after me? Read to me?"
Ade nodded. "Too little too late, eh?"
"I've had my tantrum. The slate's clear."
"Stop trying to spare my feelings."
"I can't be arsed to spare anyone's feelings, Ade." Spare mine.
Stop being kind. Get angry, for Chrissakes.
"Do I get that tea or what?"
"I was so sure I knew what I was going to say to you."
Ade's face fell a little more. He didn't look any
different: no claws, bioluminescence or any of the visible retro-fit
improvements that her own c'naatat colony
had added. She'd been devastated when she found out that Aras had
deliberately infected her. The fact that he'd done it to save her life
was lost in the brief, raging, utterly desolate realization that she
would never be able to leave.
"Ade, do you realize what I've given you? Look at me,
Ade. You can't go home. Ever. You can't
have kids. You can't even sleep with a woman again. Do you understand
what all that means?"
His lips moved and she wasn't sure if he was forming a
reply or trembling. "I know. But I'm alive, and the bezeri aren't."
There was a long pause. "So, serves me right, eh?"
"Did you object to your orders?"
"Not enough."
"Well, you probably did all you could." Shan looked
longingly at the mug of tea beyond her reach. She would have told Lin
to stuff her orders, but then she had never been a soldier. Police had
their own way of ignoring instructions they didn't fancy obeying. She
had never been in Ade's position so she had no right to judge. And
I can't expect everyone to be me. "If an
officer and a spook order you, I don't think you have a lot of choice."
"No, everyone has a
choice."
"And having a choice, you must
make it."
"Sorry?"
"Targassat. Those who can act, must." She held out her
hand to him. She knew what it was to be a leper. "You did choose,
actually. You stopped her fragging me." Perhaps the next question was
one too many. "What did you feel when you shot me?"
Ade took her hand reluctantly. It must have felt
repellent, skeletal, but he closed one hand around it and then the
other. "Nothing. The second the firing stared I went on auto. Just
reflex. I'm sorry."
"It's what we all do. Or we end up dead."
"I don't even know how to say this. I'm not Eddie."
"What?"
"When you--when you just stepped out." His eyes filled
with tears: she was shocked by his emotion. Adoration shone out of him.
"You're the…you're… sod it, Boss, you're a fucking hero. A real fucking
hero."
"Bollocks." She couldn't meet his eyes any longer. "Can
I have that bloody tea now?"
She couldn't quite manage the weight of the mug, not
even with both hands. He held it while she drank. She was so desperate
for the comforting taste that she didn't mind the humiliation of being
fed like a child. It was bliss.
"They're here, you know," said Ade.
"Who? The World Before?"
"Yeah. EqbasVorhi." He wiped her chin. She didn't
protest. "Their second ship's just shown up. They don't look like the
local wess'har and they don't speak wess'u. And they--well, Nevyan can
tell you. She's with them now." Ade shut down. His gaze dropped and he
lowered both his chin and his voice.
"And what? Come on, Ade, what?"
Aras strode back in to the room, emitting the acidic
scent of agitation. He loomed over Ade. "You eat first, isan,"
he said, and put a bowl down a little too
hard on the nearby table. It steamed alluringly, wafting that spicy
scent she'd noticed earlier. "And when you're able to walk unaided, you
can involve yourself in public life again. Until then, you stay put and
eat."
Nobody gave Shan orders. Her normal reaction would have
been to walk out and investigate for herself. But she peered under the
covers and she could see her ribs, and not just the lower ones like any
fit individual might. It was the whole rib cage, top to bottom, with no
visible sign of abdominal muscle or pectorals or breasts. It looked as
if some zealous medical student had removed every scrap of fat and
muscle from a cadaver and then replaced the skin as an afterthought,
just to keep everything tidy. She couldn't begin to imagine what her
face looked like. At least she hadn't had any looks to lose.
"Okay," she said, swallowing hard. For all the feeling
of renewed confidence, a voice inside her reminded her she wasn't that
far the other side of dead. Get a grip, girl.
You've come through a lot worse than looking like shit. "Here's
the deal. I eat, and you find me someone to teach me eqbas'u."
"I'll do it," said Ade. "No problem, Boss."
Poor sod. Her anger had
burned out. They were three freaks of nature; they had to stick
together.
A vague memory of needing to run and hide--not
hers--intruded and dissolved again. She settled back on the pillow and
decided to pursue it after Aras had finished feeding her.
She didn't enjoy being helpless. Not at all.
Language was frustrating Nevyan. Esganikan was
learning wess'u rapidly but Ual was happier with English; ironically,
it was the one tongue that appeared to unite them. Mart Barencoin was a
welcome oasis of familiar language even if it was an alien one.
He took a few cautious steps towards her in the
Exchange of Surplus Things, his two comrades watching him carefully.
"What are you planning to do with us, ma'am?" He was a
little taller than she was, and fascinatingly dark: she remained
intrigued by the exotic variety of color in human hair and eyes. "We
can make ourselves useful."
Nevyan wasn't sure if she should mention Shan to him. "Do you really
want to go to Mar'an'cas? It's not very hospitable."
Barencoin shrugged. "Chaz and Izzy could do with some
help."
"You have no need to punish yourselves just because I
won't do it for you."
"I do feel responsible, actually. In human law, I would
be."
"It was Neville, Rayat and the two colonists who took
them to Ouzhari who set and detonated the devices. They had the choice
not to use them; you transported the devices, which was foolish, but no
more foolish than carrying a tilgir and
then not using it to kill someone." She
paused to see if there was any comprehension on his face. "Aras has
already executed Joshua Garrod. We will locate his companion in due
course."
Barencoin reacted visibly to the mention of Garrod with
a small jerk of the head; he smelled agitated. Nevyan was never sure
whether to check what humans didn't know, another problem in dealing
with a species that had such a bizarre and proprietorial attitude to
information. They told each other some things and not others. She knew
now why they needed people like Eddie Michallat.
"What did Josh do that I didn't?"
"He helped Neville set the bombs and activate them."
"I transported them. Ade and--"
"Can you not see the line?"
Barencoin's bewilderment made him look much more like a
human child. "I don't think I'm going to get the hang of this
culpability thing, ma'am." He kept glancing at that light grown into
his palm, his bioscreen. All the marines had one: so did Lindsay
Neville. Nevyan understood why Shan found the device repellent. "Can we
visit Mar'an'cas and assess the situation? And can we see Sergeant
Bennett?"
So they still clung to their old identities even after
their government had discharged them. Nevyan found that sad. They had
no other community, not even in the displaced Constantine colony.
"Later."
"Just tell me if he's okay. I know there's something
wrong."
"He's well." Secrecy was very hard work. She didn't
like it at all. "He's had unexpected news, as have we all. When he's
ready, you can see him."
Barencoin made that shoulder-hunching gesture and
raised his eyebrows, indicating he didn't understand, and she fought a
natural urge to explain to him as she would to Giyadas. "We'll wait,"
he said, as if he had another option.
The Exchange of Surplus Things was becoming what Eddie
called a circus. He'd explained what that
was and she couldn't see the comparison at all. Shapakti and his crew
were moving equipment and Esganikan was taking great interest in Ual
while Eddie hovered at his side. Fersanye had volunteered to keep Rayat
and Lindsay under control in her home because her clan was accustomed
to aliens, having provided brief lodging for Shan Frankland. And many
wess'har were simply turning up to deposit and collect produce, stare
at the extraordinary tableau, and wander off about their business.
Nevyan wanted quiet order again. This was all her
doing. You invited them. It was an
uncomfortable time, but something had changed: Shan was back. She felt
her confidence growing. She wasn't alone out in front any longer.
"Hey, Ade!" said Barencoin suddenly. "Where you been,
you daft bugger?"
Ade Bennett had come into the hall as if looking for
someone. The other marines moved towards him and he came to a halt,
smiling, but folded his arms awkwardly and tightly across his chest in
that characteristic keep-your-distance gesture she'd seen Shan use so
often. Wess'har parted conspicuously to let him pass and Barencoin
glanced at them.
"Waiting for you tossers to show up," said Ade, clearly
with affection.
"You look bloody well. They treating you okay?"
"Like royalty."
"We brought some guests."
"Yeah. I know."
"What's wrong? I thought you wanted to kick seven
shades of shit out of them."
"I'm a bit busy."
"Why didn't you go to Mar'an'cas?"
"I did."
"And?"
"I came back, all right?" There was that slight edge to
his tone that said he was the dominant male. Nevyan watched, waiting
for the fight. "Look, I have to sort something right now. See Eddie.
He'll get you something to eat." Ade turned to Nevyan. "Is that okay,
ma'am? Can they go to your place?"
Nevyan felt she was collecting stray humans. It would
amuse Giyadas, though. Her adopted sons didn't share the isan'ket's
fascination with the gethes language, but they would watch them
for
amusement anyway. "I'm sure Eddie is happy to share his food."
But Barencoin didn't appear interested in a meal. He
exhibited rare tenacity. He had spotted something. "Ade, there's
something well weird going on. What's up?"
"Later," said Ade. "And I fucking mean it, okay? Later."
Then Barencoin reached out towards Ade's shoulder.
Nevyan expected it to be an aggressive gesture and prepared to
intervene, but Ade took a step back.
"I thought as much," said Barencoin, suddenly
red-faced. "Oh shit, Ade. You've got it, haven't you?"
"It's not a dose of clap. And for Chrissakes keep your
voice down."
"Shit." Barencoin backed off and turned to his two
comrades, evidently appalled. He was still glancing back at Ade and
muttering shit while he herded them
towards Eddie.
"They can keep their mouths shut," Ade reassured
Nevyan. "God knows how he'll react when he finds Shan's alive."
"It makes no difference now. C'naatat
is beyond human reach again."
Ade jerked his thumb in the direction of Shapakti. "Now
his boss-woman's here, can she spare him to do Shan a favor?"
"Is that wise?"
"Shan wants to learn the language. She speaks wess'u
and so does he. He can teach her."
"I'll ask Esganikan."
"How much does she know about Shan?"
"She knows as much as I do. We don't conceal matters
from each other. It's a most corrosive habit and I would like to get
out of it soon."
Ade shrugged. "Okay. Shan doesn't know Lin and Rayat
are here, by the way. Aras thought she'd go off on one if we told her."
"Is she well enough to talk to me?" Shan would
understand that Nevyan had duties to carry out before she could visit a
friend. Aras needed time with her first. It occurred to Nevyan that Ade
might need that too, but that was a matter for the three of them to
resolve. "I should be with her, at least for a little while."
"She's eating everything that doesn't move and swearing
like a trooper, so apart from the fact she looks like a corpse, she's
getting back to normal."
"A harsh assessment."
"What did you expect me to do, cry my eyes out at the
state of her?" Ade fumbled with his beret and shoved it into his
pocket. "Done that. She doesn't need reminding what a state she's in."
"Do you want to talk to Commander Neville?"
"I've got nothing to say to her."
"Will you help us to examine the material on her
communication device and Rayat's?"
Ade glanced down at his boots. They were exceptionally
shiny. "What are we looking for?"
"We want to know who authorized the use of nuclear
devices."
"The FEU."
"Personally. Organizations aren't responsible. People
are." Nevyan beckoned Aitassi: the aide would trust him to extract
information. "And even if they're no longer alive when we reach Earth,
those who later contribute to their guilt will be."
Nevyan saw that same reversion to a child's face: Ade
Bennett understood responsibility no better than Barencoin did,
although both of them clearly wanted to. She wondered how any gethes
would ever learn.
If they didn't learn, the Eqbas would teach them the
hard way.
Ade skipped his daily run for the first time in
more than twenty years, barring days when he'd actually been in combat.
He'd do an extra few kilometers tomorrow. Once you let things slip, you
lost all discipline.
But Shan's alive.
The thought kept rolling over him anew as if he'd
forgotten--as if he could. He had a second chance. You didn't get those
often and you didn't waste them. He jogged back home along the
terraces, occasionally feeling for the two handhelds in his top pocket,
and realized that he didn't actually have a clue what he was going to
do with that unimaginable opportunity.
He leaned on the pearl-encrusted door and it swung
open. The smell of hot oil and caramelizing sugars filled the living
room and the table was covered in plates and bowls. Aras, holding a
sizzling pan in one hand, gave Ade an exasperated look and motioned him
to the table.
"Hey, I just saw Mart and Sue and--" Ade paused. Shan
was up. She was really up, in every sense.
She was standing in front of the screen that occupied a large section
of one wall, a walking corpse in her formal black uniform pants and a
white sports vest. Neither fitted her any longer. She looked freshly
horrific.
"Shit," she said. "What the fuck's happening back
there?" Something on the BBChan news feed was annoying her. Then she
stopped and glanced over her shoulder. "Hi, Ade. Find me anyone?"
"Nevyan's going to ask Esganikan."
"And she is?" Shan set an unsteady but determined
course for the table and half fell onto the bench beside it. She
reached for a pile of netun jay and
munched contentedly.
"She's the commander of the second Eqbas mission."
"Yeah, I'm going to want to talk to her."
How long had he been away? A matter of hours.
Shan's arms had some suggestion of sinews
and he could no longer see bone across the full width of her chest. Her
black hair was almost a respectable crew cut, slightly fluffy and thick
enough to make her look more like a woman again. And she was, as far as
she was concerned, back in charge of the operation. It was written all
over her, from the set of her shoulders to that way she had of
clenching her jaw.
"I'm waiting," she said. She was eating like a horse; netun,
those nice little chewy flat-breads Aras
called gurut, a bowl of an bright orange evem soup, and
a large jug of tea. "I can't just
sit here on my arse all day."
"You can." Ade decided to distract her from expeditions
and laid the handhelds on the table. She was a copper. She'd done more
investigations than he'd had hot dinners. She knew her way around
records and files. "Take a look at this."
She picked up the handhelds and turned them over. "That
reminds me," she said. "Can I have my sidearm and my swiss back,
please?"
Aras smelled annoyed, a scent almost like grapefruit
oil. Ade was finding that kind of cue easier to pick up now.
"Yes, isan. But
you have no need to go out and use them, have you?"
"I'll sit and eat until I'm fit to go out. That was the
deal."
She examined Rayat's device with one hand, taking a
bite out of a netun and wiping a stray
bead of bright gold filling off her chin with a careful finger. The
handheld clicked into life and she studied the image. Ade liked to
watch her think. It was exciting to imagine what process was going on
in that agile, ferocious mind, as long as he wasn't on the receiving
end of it.
"Nevyan needs information from that," he said.
"I really ought to do a verified copy of the data
before I go crashing around. You know me, stick to rules of evidence."
Her eyes were fixed on the device, appraising and unemotional. Then she
almost smiled. "What do you want to find?"
Aras slammed the pan down on the range and leaned
across the table, hands flat on it. "Enough," he hissed. "She isn't
well enough for this."
"Sweetheart, I'm a big girl and I'll decide what I need
to know." She put her hand on his. "This is what I do. I'm a copper."
She paused as if something funny had occurred to her. "Do you know, I
never put my papers in? I never actually resigned. Is Wessex Regional
Constabulary still there any more? Did anyone tell them I was dead so
they could release my pension?"
"I can find out for you," said Ade. He never worried
about his pension. "Here, have some tea."
"This means you've had contact with Rayat."
"Leave him to Nevyan," said Aras.
"He's alive and here, then?"
"I--"
"Aras, I've managed to keep my head for two months in
space without a fucking suit." Her tone was calm and she squeezed his
hand, but it was tinted with warning. Ade could see her knuckles
whiten. "I'm capable of hearing a sitrep from Ade without going
ballistic. Go on, Ade. Brief me."
Ade felt he was pushing Aras's self-control to the
limit. Wess'har didn't seem to have much, not as far as anger was
concerned. He glanced at Aras's grim expression, and then at Shan: and
Shan was the Boss. He deferred.
"Ual brought Rayat and Lindsay here. Mart, Sue and Jon
arrested them."
"Result." She gave him an approving thumbs-up,
apparently unconcerned. "Nice job."
"Actually, they turned up in the second Eqbas ship. The
commander is a big scary bird called Esganikan Gai."
"But you're not afraid of big scary birds, are you?"
"Nah." He grinned, feeling a little precious warmth
from her. "Not usually."
She winked. "Good."
"And they've sent teams to recce Umeh and Bezer'ej from
orbit."
Shan thumbed the controls of the handheld. "What am I
looking for in here?"
"Culpability. That's what Serrimissani called it."
"Explicit orders to deploy ERDs."
"Yeah."
"Personal, not collective, right?"
"Names."
Shan reached for another gurut
and chewed carefully while she browsed through files. If she hadn't
looked so skeletal and swamped by her uniform, she could easily have
passed for her old self, in control, analytical, and not about to take
any shit: a senior detective going about her business. He wondered if
she was going to collapse when his back was turned.
"Get me my swiss, will you, sweetheart?" she said, eyes
not moving from the handheld. Ade went to the cupboard and reached for
it at the same time Aras did. They stared at each other for a second
too long and Ade felt his face redden.
Silly sod. She didn't mean you.
Aras took the swiss and handed it to Ade with an
expression and scent that he simply couldn't read at all. If Shan had
seen the reaction, she showed no sign of it. But she never missed a
trick and Ade felt inexplicably humiliated.
Ade surrendered the swiss. "Thanks," she said. No, she
was completely deadpan. He couldn't even smell a reaction, and he was
sure he could do that by now. "Now, this is what you do. You shove this
in here. A little upgrade I borrowed when
I was in Special Branch."
Both the swiss and Rayat's handheld made a satisfying
simultaneous chunk sound and Shan smiled,
not at him or Aras but to herself.
"I'd have thought a spook's kit would have been harder
to crack," said Ade.
"Yeah, they often think that too," said Shan. "It pays
to play Mr. Plod. Anyway, Rayat wouldn't want to draw attention to
himself if anyone from the Thetis payload
picked this up. But all I've done is get in. Rayat's too professional
to have obviously encrypted stuff. Anyway, what are we looking for?
Some dialogue that shows he was given explicit instructions to use
Beano bombs? Okay, tell me what you know about the sequence of events
that led up to deployment."
Ade wasn't sure where to start. "When we started
planning to use the Once-Only suits?"
"When Rayat got involved."
Ade shut his eyes and imagined himself back on board Actaeon
again. Think. In
Actaeon's armory, Neville and me and Rayat looking
at the racks. "He was using his handheld as if he was messaging
someone, and then he wanted to know if we could get ERDs down to the
surface in the Once-Only suits. I said yes because they were about
thirty kilos each, and I said it was a bad idea. Then Commander Neville
said he couldn't deploy ERDs and they had an argument about Beano bombs
too. She was adamant they weren't going to use any, and Rayat wasn't
going to discuss it in front of me so I asked her if she wanted me to
leave and she said yes."
"Well, she's as good as dead anyway so her motive
doesn't matter now." Shan scrolled and tapped, eyes moving between her
swiss and the handheld. "He couldn't encrypt on the ITX so if he was
phoning home, it was either plain language or code. Let's have a look
at his message log."
"He won't have one. He'll have done a fast shred."
Shan turned the handheld so that Ade could see it. It
was just a screen of numbers and symbols. "Outgoing message paths. He
hasn't bothered to erase them. And he's not that careless." She chewed
her lip thoughtfully. Aras hovered again, taking her left hand and
folding her fingers around a mug as a silent order to drink its
contents. "He hasn't sent that many in the past six months, which isn't
surprising really. Let's have a look at the address book."
"Not even Lindsay would be thick enough to file a
number labeled SPOOK HQ."
"They're going to show up on Earth with a warrant,
aren't they?"
"Who?"
"Esganikan and company. They'd better hope the suspects
are going to be around in twenty-five years' time. Or maybe they're
just looking for an excuse for a punch-up."
"That's not very wess'har."
"No. But they must have thought about the time
differential."
"Surely."
"Yeah, surely." The idea was bothering her, he could
see that, a puzzle she couldn't crack. "But if the alternative is to
say the guilty parties might be dead when you turn up, then you might
as well write off the whole crime. And wess'har don't seem to believe
in a statute of limitations or spent convictions."
"They said something about those
who later contribute to their guilt."
Shan appeared to consider that and then flicked through
files. Ade moved to look over her shoulder. She shifted a little,
evidently uncomfortable, and then tugged at his pants leg.
"Sit down."
"Sorry."
"Is there any slang term for Beano bombs?"
"That is the slang.
Biological neutralization ordnance."
"Any other names?"
"Oh… bleach. Floor cleaners."
Aras sat down at the table opposite Shan and tucked
into the pile of gurut, making a faint
riffling sound like someone flicking through a wad of paper. Ade had
never heard it before.
"What are you so pleased about?" asked Shan.
The urrrring sound
stopped. "You're home, isan."
"Yeah, I'm glad to be back, too," she said. "I really
am."
It was a brief moment and one that didn't include Ade.
He'd have to get used to that. Shan laid aside the handheld for a
moment and wolfed down more netun.
"Is it me, or is it hot in here?"
"It's you," said Aras.
"Okay, cool-down time," she said, and made an unsteady
path for the back terrace, the rear one that overlooked the plain. Aras
had excavated his home at the furthest edge of the caldera. He must
have had a hard time coming to terms with being c'naatat
in a city where everyone was part of a family.
There was an uneasy silence. Aras opened the large
container he had built for Black and White and placed food in their
green glass bowl. Ade wandered across and stood watching, trying to
find the right moment to talk.
Two noses poked out of the nest ball of shredded
fabric, then the rats waddled out and snatched chunks of capsicum and
soybeans. They rushed into separate corners to devour them.
"You're going to thump me, aren't you?" said Ade.
Aras began urrrring again.
He could still talk while he was doing it. Ade was fascinated and
realized how dully human he must have seemed to Shan by comparison.
"No. I would prefer that she rests and eats, but she's
Shan, so she'll do as she pleases."
"I think Lin and Rayat will occupy her."
"She seemed quite calm about their presence. Please
help me keep her that way."
"Anything else you want to say to me?" Back
off, get out, leave my missus alone. "If
so, now's the time."
Aras picked up a gurut and
chewed thoughtfully. "Yes. It's your turn to clean the floors."
If he had wanted to tell him to sod off he'd have done
it, Ade reasoned. He went to look at Rayat's handheld, coupled to
Shan's machine by a fiber, and realized she had taken her swiss out to
the terrace with her.
He stood at the door. Shan was leaning on the stone
balustrade, head bent, swiss in one hand. Then she raised her arm and
there was a flash of reflected light. He realized she had the swiss's
bubble-thin screen on its mirror setting.
She turned, suddenly aware of him, thinly disguised
shock on her face.
"You okay, Boss?"
She pinched the bridge of her nose. "Why didn't you
tell me how bad I really looked?"
"You're looking a lot better than when they found you."
She ran her hand over her head as if testing how thick
her hair was. It was the first time it had occurred to him that she
cared how she looked and that her current condition might distress her.
She'd always taken care of her appearance, but in an officer sort of
way that was more about polished boots and smart uniform than the usual
do-I-look-okay fussing of a woman. She'd had lovely long jet-black hair
and now she didn't. She had also had a nice arse, and that was gone
too, but she wouldn't know that.
"Sod it, I'm over a hundred and twenty." She forced a
smile but it was unconvincing. "And I've been a bit dead lately, so all
in all I'm looking okay for my age."
"We'll get you some decent fatigues made up."
"And boots. My boots didn't make it."
"I bet I can find a ussissi who can blag a pair from
Umeh Station."
"You're a good bloke, Ade."
"Salt of the earth, me."
"Come on, let's get on with rummaging Rayat's bloody
data."
She seemed crushed. But he didn't care what she looked
like right then and he knew Aras didn't either. It was enough to have
her back. He put a cautious hand under her elbow and gave her just
enough support to walk back into the living room with some dignity.
"It's all right," he said, giving Aras a
help-me-out-here look. "A couple more days and you'll look good as new.
It's not worth getting upset about."
"Do I look upset?"
"Yeah. Frankly, yeah, you do. Your hair's growing back
at a hell of a rate, though. You'll be back to normal before you know
it."
"Don't kid yourself it's about how I look." She placed
her swiss on the table and linked it up to Rayat's device again. Aras
sat down next to her and put his hand on her arm. "It's what's in
Rayat's handheld. It's a bit of a shock when you find that he was
briefed by Eugenie Perault. Remember her?"
"The minister who did your Suppressed Briefing for the
mission," said Ade.
"Go on, you might as well say it."
"The one who shanghaied you."
Shan stopped short of shaking Aras's hand off her arm,
but Ade could see she had braced her frail muscles. If she could do
that it was at least a sign that she was regenerating more tissue.
"Maybe," she said. "But I want to know why she briefed both
of us for the same mission. And I need to
know if the bitch knew what was really out here."
We demand the
following. We require the return of Minister Par Paral Ual, who acts
without authority: we demand that you hand over Aras Sar Iussan for
trial: and we demand that you withdraw your vessel from our space.
Official request from Minister Par Nir
Bedoi, Home Affairs, to the matriarchs of F'nar
F'nar Plain, November 3,
2376.
Esganikan's ship had become a city in its
own right.
Out on the plain, the vessel had changed shape and had
rearranged itself into a number of smooth shapes like a series of
bronze and blue bubbles. It solved the logistics problem of where F'nar
might put two thousand extra wess'har.
"Wow," said Eddie. He thought of the two shiplets that
had formed out of the main vessel and gone their own way. "How do they
do that?"
Nevyan, walking beside him, tugged at the neckline of
her dhren, the opalescent white wrap that
many of the matriarchs in F'nar wore. It formed itself immediately into
a cowl. "You call it nanotechnology." She pulled the dhren
apart as if ripping it and it opened along
an invisible seam like a zipper. "This fabric uses that principle. The
ship's materials are created the same way."
"For a bunch of nature lovers, you do employ some dodgy
hi-tech."
Nevyan zipped herself up again. "If it were dodgy,"
she said, "we would not be using it."
Eddie resigned himself to being a caveman again.
Wess'har had been a space-faring species when humans thought bows and
arrows were this year's must-have and were starting to realize wild
dogs could be their best friends. It put you in your place.
"I should have asked this a long time ago, Nevyan, but
how far back does the wess'har civilization go?"
"Define civilization."
"Building cities."
"Using your frame of reference, a million years."
"I'm not sure we'd got to grips with fire by then."
Eddie's brain gave up trying to examine the context and settled for
being awed. The wall-to-wall hard-science PhDs of the Thetis
payload had been gently patronizing
towards his humble anthropology degree, but he felt he was now the best
placed of all of them to see how astonishingly nothing Homo sapiens
was. "And you haven't started
living on pills or given up sex or uploaded your consciousness into
machines."
"Why would we want to do that? It sounds extremely
foolish."
"Well, we always tend to think that's what we'll be
doing in years to come."
"You're a very sad species," she said, without a hint
of sarcasm. "You want to eradicate all the things that make you a
living creature."
"Where were you when I was making documentaries?" Eddie
asked wistfully.
The camp of scattered ship-bits was busy with Eqbas
personnel, many of them females. One group was standing in a circle,
gazing down at something on the ground and occasionally crouching to
press their hands on the soil. Eddie let his bee cam loose. It made a
slow pass round them and one watched it in that same carefully hostile
way that Serrimissani did. He hoped it would take evasive action fast
enough if the Eqbas swatted it.
"What are they doing?" he asked.
"Finding a water course to tap into," said Nevyan. "They plan an
extended stay."
"And how do you feel about that?"
"Confused."
Nevyan walked past the hydrology team to where
Esganikan Gai stood watching the activity in her camp. It had the feel
of the Thetis mission, setting up a base
and trying not to look or feel permanent, two years and a whole messy
history ago.
Esganikan made a gesture with one straight arm,
beckoning Nevyan towards her like an aircraft director on a carrier's
deck. It struck Eddie as a little imperious. If she tried that on Shan
she'd get a rude awakening.
Shan. He hadn't been back
to see her yet and she'd been conscious for a couple of days according
to Serrimissani; the ussissi was a natural journalist if ever he saw
one. Poor old Shazza. She'd be in a
terrible state. He wondered if she'd recognize him. There was always
something embarrassingly painful about seeing a once-powerful person
reduced to frail dependence, a nasty tap on the shoulder from your own
mortality.
He started musing. What happens
to people when they realize they're never going
to die? Wow. The whole human existence is predicated on inevitable
death. Maybe Shan would recover enough to talk to him about
that. He hoped so. He hoped she would talk to him anyway, even if she
never gave him another story, and he accepted that he had finally gone
soft and begun caring about things other than his job. He wondered if
he'd have felt that way if he'd still been on Earth, in the daily fight
to get a story before any other bastard did.
"Greet you," said Esganikan, providing her own fluting
chorus. She made that aircraft controller's marshaling movement again.
"Learn English for Ual."
"Don't mind me," said Eddie. He stepped over the
threshold of a shiplet, now somehow relaxed into a bubble-shaped hut.
He found himself in a vestibule that put him in mind of the city of
Surang, organic curves and projections even more eccentric than
F'nar's. His bee cam followed him inside.
Nevyan knelt down opposite Esganikan and warbled at
her. Eddie decided to stay standing. There was an exchange that he
couldn't begin to follow but it appeared friendly enough. Then Nevyan
knelt very still, something Eddie had learned to interpret as a
negative reaction. She'd heard something that had surprised her.
"Clue me in," said Eddie.
"I'm asking her why she has so many isan've
with her," said Nevyan. "She says that
some isan've choose to leave their
families behind, in safety, or to delay bonding. It's the nature of
many missions."
"But you travel with your whole clan. Mestin took you
all on her tour of duty on Bezer'ej. Can't they?"
"We never travel outside this system," said Nevyan. "And it's a
relatively safe place." She listened intently to Esganikan
again. "She says that we have the luxury of a more backward life."
Backward. Eddie flinched. "Are you
going to smack her in the mouth for that?"
"Why?"
"Never mind. Can I take a look around the camp?"
Esganikan considered the request, trilling. "The
teaching?"
"What's she asking?"
"She asks if you have any text to accelerate her
learning of English."
"A book?" Eddie fumbled in his pockets and took out his
handheld. He hated the idea of being parted from it, but this was going
to make his life a lot easier. "There's a stack of dictionaries in
here, but no language course as such, and it wouldn't be wess'u to
English anyway. Not much help."
"A list of words and rules."
"Yes."
Trill, trill, warble. "That's what she
requires."
Eddie handed Esganikan the device with the BBChan logo
color-coded right through the casing and every component. "Don't break
it," he said. "It belongs to the company." He showed her the controls
with exaggerated gestures. "I've opened it at the right page. Can you
make a copy somehow?"
"Will learn," said Esganikan grimly.
"Yeah, I bet you will," said Eddie, and excused himself
while the girls did business.
He walked among the bubbles, nodding politely at any
Eqbas who looked his way. One of them watched the bee cam and walked
slowly after it, giving him a wonderful but sinister shot. Eventually
he recognized Shapakti. A sense of relief flooded him in the way it
always did when he was in completely unknown territory and spotted a
scrap of familiarity.
"Clever," said Eddie, pointing to the shiplet bubbles
and giving him a thumbs-up gesture. Gestures were always dangerous but
Eddie doubted there was enough cultural similarity between them for it
to mean something offensive. If he got a punch in the face he'd know
he'd guessed wrong.
Shapakti stared at Eddie's thumb and made an
exaggerated pointing gesture with both arms.
"Safety exits? You'll be coming round with drinks and
tax-free purchases later?"
Shapakti burbled and took him by the arm--gently, thank
God--to turn him to face the direction in which he'd pointed. "Gethes,"
he said. Well, that was clear enough.
"Who that gethes?"
Eddie shielded his eyes with one hand against the glare
from F'nar's terraces and focused. The frame was emaciated, and the
stride unsteady, but it was Shan. Ade walked behind her.
"Holy shit," said Eddie. You saw
her brought in. You saw how bad she was. "That's unbelievable."
"Who?" Shapkti constructed his English phrases like a
wall. "Who is that?"
Eddie wouldn't get emotional. She wouldn't like that,
not one bit. "Shapakti, old son, that's Shan
Chail. Frankland. Understand?"
"C'naatat?"
"That's it." Eddie, flushed with that perilous
enthusiasm that came with suddenly being understood in a strange
language, threw caution aside. "Shan Chail--isan.
Aras--jurej. Oursan. Yes?"
It was certainly an economic language. Shapakti made a
curious roll of his head and let out a long low trill that might have
been surprise. It could also have been complete incomprehension. They
waited, watching. Shan advanced, stumbling occasionally and being
steadied by Ade.
She looked terribly, terribly ill. That was a huge
improvement. She paused in front of him, a little shaky, hands on hips.
"Hi Eddie," she said. "Don't I even get a good morning?"
"Bad hair day, doll?"
"Remind me to introduce you to Mr. Truncheon."
"I really missed you, you old tart."
"It's good to see you too, you tosser. It really is."
He stopped short of hugging her. He wanted to. But c'naatat
made you cautious, even if you had no
breaks in your skin and the chance of infection was remote. He hoped
she realized that he cared.
Ade stared at Shapakti in a way that would have started
a fist fight on Earth. The Eqbas didn't react at all. He was focused on
Shan.
"Shan, this is Shapakti," said Eddie. "You've got his
attention."
Shapakti inhaled audibly. "Frankland."
"I might even let you call me Guv'nor," she said. "Teh, g'ne'hek
eqbas'u sve?"
"Hey, clever," said Eddie. She could do the two voices.
It was fascinating. "What did you say?"
"I've asked him if he'll teach me eqbas'u."
"Esganikan wants to learn English."
"Our gift to the world. We'll throw in cricket,
syphilis and bureaucracy for free." Shan raked one hand through her
hair, a little self-conscious. Eddie had never realized she cared how
she looked. "Is that a deal, Shapakti? Teh, mek?"
"Mek, chail," said
Shapakti.
"Good lad. Now let's go and see Esganikan."
"Why?" asked Eddie.
"Nosey bastard," said Shan, playing the police officer
again. "Because I'm an isan of F'nar and
she's on my manor, son. That's why."
Eddie pointed to the appropriate bubble. "In there.
Should you be up and about this soon?"
Shan ignored him with the practiced air of someone who
was used to asking all the questions and strode ahead, a credible
approximation of her old pace. Ade matched her stride. "I hear
Esganikan Gai is keen to know more about c'naatat.
Ade and I are going to show her."
"Be nice to her, won't you, Shan?"
"Any reason I shouldn't be?"
Shapakti fell in behind her, warbling and trilling. It
was simply melodic noise to Eddie, but Shan half-turned to deliver a
blast of wess'u at him. Shapakti dropped his head a little and lapsed
back into silence.
"What did he say?" asked Eddie.
"Cheeky bastard wanted to know if I give oursan
to the c'naatat
who hates him."
Shapakti meant Ade. Ade dropped his gaze and found his
boots of sudden and overwhelming interest.
"And what did you say?" said Eddie.
"Nosey bastard," said Shan.
Ual found F'nar an extraordinarily awkward
city. It was chaotic, disorderly and full of stairways. Isenj weren't
built for steep stairs.
The treads were too narrow for him to place his whole
bulk on them and he found himself tottering, trying to find purchase
with his rear and side legs and failing. Bipeds never had to worry
about such things.
"I suggest we stay at ground level," said Ralassi.
"If I'd known our stay would be extended, I would have
brought more supplies with us."
"The next shuttle will drop off some food, Minister. Do
you want to eat now?"
"Later."
"And do you intend to return to Umeh?"
"You think I can remain here?" Ual hadn't expected
this. He had anticipated the rage of his opponents--in government and
among the electorate--but he had not foreseen Eqbas dispatching a
vessel
to Umeh. "I've probably made a disastrous mistake, but I must try to
salvage something."
The Eqbas ship hadn't landed. It was just orbiting and
gathering data. It was the worst possible situation. How could he now
expect isenj to accept the assistance of the wess'har with one of their
ships looking like a potential aggressor? Now he had neither his
bargaining chip, as Eddie called it, nor a receptive audience for his
plan.
The first isenj ever to visit the enemy on a peaceful
mission had got it badly wrong. Ual knew he would go down in history
and memory as a fool rather than a visionary.
But he had come this far. The cycle of resentment and
decline and sporadic fruitless war had to
be broken. He made his way back down the passage to the Exchange of
Surplus Things and tried to find a corner in which to be inconspicuous.
Wess'har came to look at him, or so he thought; but
they appeared to be spending as much time sorting through containers of
food as studying him. They were all tall and irregularly
shaped--vertically symmetrical, yes, but all gangly limbs and long
faces.
Eddie, with his talent for comparing all beings to
species on his own world, called them sea horses. There were no longer
other animal species on Bezer'ej and there hadn't been for many, many
generations. Ual had nothing in his environment that he could compare
to the wess'har. It was the first time he had thought about the sadness
inherent in that.
But some wess'har were shorter than him. A small one
with a plume of stiff gold hair across the top of its head, just like
the big females, approached him and stood far too close to him. He was
a government minister. He'd earned the right to a little more personal
space.
"You're in trouble," said the wess'har in perfect
English. "I'm Giyadas. Nevyan took me as her daughter."
Ual decided she was an infant. As with isenj, it was
hard to tell a wess'har's age by their size: but wess'har had no
genetic memory to make them wise from birth, and none of the social
restraint that adult isenj learned. Adult wess'har seemed as outspoken
as young ones, often to the point of offense.
It was his first impression of them--big, gold, shiny,
and rude. They would never show the self-control needed to cope with
living at close quarters like his own people.
"Yes, I'm in a great deal of trouble," said Ual.
"Have the gethes shafted
you?"
"What does that mean?"
"Put you into a difficult position and then abandoned
you." The child looked up at him, tilting her head this way and that.
"Eddie taught me the word."
Ah. Eddie's accent was
discernible. "If you mean that the humans can do nothing more to aid us
in exchange for the things we have given them, yes."
"You're hard to understand."
He was a minister of state yet he was reduced to
chatting to a small alien child. This wasn't how Eddie's shuttle
diplomacy was supposed to work.
"My people won't like it at first, but I think we will
fare better by cooperating with your people than by fighting them.
There is an…inevitability about wess'har."
"You mean that we can take you any time we want."
Ual repeated the phrase to himself, appalled. Yes, it
was true. And now the Eqbas were involved it would
happen, sooner or later. Sooner and peacefully struck him as better
than a long noble fight to the last isenj. They had made that boast
before and lost. And there had been no last isenj, just millions more.
"More words that Eddie taught you?"
"Shan Frankland said it."
He had heard small snatches of information about Shan
Frankland and was trying to piece them together. Even dead, she seemed
still to be pivotal for the wess'har. "The dead officer."
"No, she lives."
Ual decided to let the comment go unquestioned. Humans
had some eccentric beliefs about noncorporeal existence and it seemed
that Giyadas had been exposed to them. "And what do you think of your
cousins from Eqbas Vorhi?"
"They're different."
Ual was being sociable. There was no harm in indulging
the child of a potential ally. Giyadas took his arm and tugged a little
more forcefully than he imagined such a small creature could.
"I want you to meet someone," she said.
Ual followed her patiently, maneuvering his bulk around
crates and containers while wess'har stood back to let him pass. They
didn't attack him or even hurl abuse. He was the enemy, the ancient
enemy, and he knew what would have happened if a wess'har had arrived
on Umeh. Isenj felt the old injustices as vividly now as their
forebears did in the days of Mjat.
But there was no hostility. If anything, they seemed no
more than mildly curious. He almost tripped over a strange cylindrical
fruit on the floor but a wess'har reached down and removed it from his
path.
I don't understand them at all.
Rude and considerate; peaceful and extravagantly violent;
technologically sophisticated and yet living a primitive rural life. And
they have never threatened Umeh.
Ual had come to negotiate, not to learn, but learning
was overwhelming him. No isenj could have any idea what they were
dealing with.
He shuffled out into the sunlight of a gloriously clear
day quite unlike any on polluted Umeh. The alleys and small courtyards
that made up the tangled ground level of terraced F'nar were fiercely
illuminated by the reflection from the pearl surfaces, the polar
opposite of Jejeno in every way he could imagine. Giyadas trotted
ahead, stopping every so often to check he was keeping up.
"Here," said Giyadas. She tilted her head and clasped
her hands, a miniature of the adult matriarchs. "He wanted to see you.
He says he's never met an isenj who wasn't trying to kill him or who he
wasn't trying to kill."
A huge alien that looked more human than anything
stepped out in front of him. He had a face that was all harsh angles,
and liquid dark eyes like the soldier Barencoin except that there was
far less white visible in them. He wasn't wess'har, and he wasn't
human. Ual couldn't identify his species.
The creature flicked a long dark braid of hair over his
collar and sniffed the air.
"I'm the Destroyer of Mjat," he said in immaculate
English. "I'm Aras Sar Iussan."
Eddie Michallat said there were monsters in human
history, and that humans often speculated on how they would exact their
social revenge if they met these long-dead criminals. But this monster
was not long dead; and now he was simply an extraordinary creature for
whom Ual could suddenly feel nothing but …astonishment.
This wess'har, or whatever he had become, was more than
fifty generations old. And he had survived being an isenj prisoner of
war, a very bitter war indeed.
Ual was glad his political rivals weren't there to hear
him. The first thing that came into his head was hardly what they would
have wanted. But he said it anyway.
"I'm truly sorry for what we did to you in captivity,"
said Ual.
Aras was completely still. Ual wondered if it was a
preparation to spring forward and attack like a ussissi, but the
Destroyer of Mjat simply stood there and didn't even blink.
"And I regret that I had to kill so many of you," he
said. "I remember, you see. I caught my c'naatat
parasite from your people when they cut me and tore me. So now I have
your genetic memory, and I know what it is to stand outside myself and
see me as I am."
"A rare gift," said Ual. "And perhaps one we should all
seek. Knowing what you do, then, would you destroy us again?"
"Under the same circumstances?" Aras tilted his head
sharply and Ual could clearly see the wess'har in him now. "Yes, of
course I would."
Ual took care not to touch him, but he approached close
enough to make it clear that he would follow him to talk further.
"Let us look for different circumstances," he said.
Shan hadn't seen Nevyan since she had last left
F'nar for Bezer'ej, a long cold lifetime ago. Esganikan could wait her
turn.
There was a distinct scent of mango in the air as Shan
entered the ship's detached section and it made her indefinably uneasy.
It was an indication of the presence of a dominant female under
challenge or threat, a pheromone powerful enough to make a ruling
matriarch cede her position and become deferential.
She could emit the pheromone herself, but now that she
had it back under conscious control again she wanted to keep it that
way. Wess'har couldn't override their scent reactions; she could. C'naatat
had somehow provided her with the
capacity for tact that she'd never had as a regular human being and now
it was time she used it.
And there was Nevyan, bobbing her chess-piece head and
craning her neck to see who was entering the compartment.
You saved me, kid. You saved me.
Shan stepped forward.
She'd never been comfortable with displays of emotion.
Any sane person would have flung their arms around their rescuer,
grateful and tearful. Shan wanted to, but the old control born of years
of barricading herself against the world took the impulse and crushed
it before she could follow it.
But this was still her friend, the woman who hadn't
abandoned her to space.
"I'm not sure where to start." Shan reverted to English
for a moment. "Thank you doesn't quite cover it."
Nevyan's scent-burst of contentment--sweet powdery
musk--almost overwhelmed the mango aromas. "My friend," she said. "Oh,
my friend, it's good to see you." She made an awkward move forward and
the two of them stood on that precarious brink of actually touching.
Neither stepped over it. Mestin would touch her, always with a
reassuring layer of fabric between her and Shan's skin, but most were
still cautious. "Look how well you are."
Well was relative. "I'm
in your debt."
"It's enough for me to see you alive. You owe me
nothing."
Esganikan, a head taller than Shan even without the
magnificent plume of copper hair, watched them intently. "You're the c'naatat."
"Actually, I'm Superintendent Shan Frankland." Don't
start a ruck. Don't start effing and blinding at
her. "And this is my… colleague, Ade Bennett. He caught the
parasite too. Neither of us planned to, believe me."
"I want to know all about this organism. Is it true you
survived in space?"
"I'm here, aren't I?"
"I don't understand."
Rhetorical. She doesn't get it. "Yes.
It's true."
At first Shan was distracted by the growing intensity
of the dominance pheromone--discernible, but not provocative--and then
she was struck by the fact that the interior of the ship was utterly
alien: not just wess'har alien, but alien
alien. There were the trademark organic curves and loops, but the
bulkheads were a mass of shifting light and lines, all intense detail
and movement.
Shan put her hand on the bulkhead and familiar violet
and ruby points of light rippled under the skin of her fingers. Her
bioluminescent signaling was back. It tried to match the colors she
touched, attempting to respond.
Esganikan studied Shan carefully with much
head-tilting, then stared at Ade for a few moments. He stood with his
feet slightly apart, smartly upright, hands clasped behind his back.
"You carry more than the life-form itself, then."
"I do indeed." Shan flexed her hands, fist to fingers
to fist, and the full spectrum of colors illuminated them. "A few genes
from the bezeri. Aras is the expert in c'naatat
activity, if anybody is, and you can see how much it's changed him. It
scavenges genetic material."
"You and your kind are exceptionally dangerous."
"Yes, I realize what gethes
can do."
"I meant c'naatat."
Shan felt something like solidity--and she had no better
word for it--settling and spreading in her chest. It wasn't the cold
constriction of adrenaline when she was sizing up for a fight: she knew
that only too well, primal aggression poisoned a little by fear. No,
this was her. This was the her she had discovered when
helpless in the void
with only her mind for refuge. A voice inside said try
it, go on, see what I'm really made of. She silenced it. This
wasn't the time to create divisions.
"I know," Shan said carefully. "That's why I ditched
myself in space. That's why Aras spent centuries in exile, that's why
Ade gave himself up, and I'm afraid that's why Rayat and Neville
detonated bombs on Ouzhari. We're not about to hand it over."
Esganikan smelled dominant.
Shan was fully aware of it but now it was touching her in some way,
making her… cautious. Suddenly she realized what was happening to her.
She's backing you down. She's
outscenting you. It started the minute you walked through that hatch.
Shan let go of her control. Her fragile abdominal
muscles tightened and she let her skin release the scent that said I'm
the Guv'nor, so don't fuck with me.
Esganikan's shoulders relaxed a little. Shan felt the
moment pass. It was fleeting, insubstantial: she didn't like this
silent game at all, but she had emitted enough scent to pro duce the
reaction. She glanced at Nevyan, who was absolutely still with her
muscles locked.
"Will you let us assess the symbiont?" said Esganikan.
"I'll think about it," said Shan. Yeah,
don't try it on with me again, sunshine. "I want to see the
prisoners."
"Why?"
"I'm a police officer, even if the police force I
served is long gone. You know what police are, do you?"
"I do now."
"I need to find out things from one of these prisoners."
"Will you try to free them?"
"Of course not."
"Then speak to them, but don't execute them." It was a
casual remark, symptomatic of that odd wess'har ambiguity about respect
for life. "We do not yet know if they will be of use to us in dealing
with your governments."
Your governments. So she
was still almost a gethes, but at least
Esganikan now knew who the Guv'nor was. She was going to have to talk
to Nevyan about this.
Nevyan followed Shan and Ade back outside. At a
discreet distance from the fragmented Eqbas vessel, Shan caught Nevyan
by her elbow. She flinched.
"Are you okay dealing with Esganikan?"
Nevyan's hands were clasped carefully in front of her,
multijointed fingers meshed in a way that a human would have found
painfully impossible. "It's confusing."
"Why?"
"I find myself disagreeing with her, but she's very
dominant."
"So? You're dominant."
"I find I want to disagree about our relations with
Umeh."
"It's none of my business, but--"
Ade cut in. "You're right, it's not, Boss. Stay out of
it for a while. Please. Get some rest."
"Yes, I need your counsel," said Nevyan, ignoring him.
Ade's male opinion didn't register on the scale. "She's set on a course
of action and I have doubts. Why do I feel like this? Where is our
natural consensus?"
"Maybe she's just bloody wrong,"
said Shan, still rattled by the encounter herself. "What's bothering
you?"
"Umeh," she said. "At first, its only relevance was the
human enclave. Then Ual asked for our assistance with his world's
environmental pressures."
"That's a brave move." Shan looked first for the
political flanker that Ual might be pulling but couldn't think of one
right then. There had to be one. "Are you
going to help them?"
"Help is a relative term," said Nevyan. "Esganikan is
very keen to assist, so keen that she plans to land a contingent on
Umeh, with or without the consent of the various regional governments."
Shan thought about it for a while, chewing her lip. Her
legs were feeling the strain of a long walk and Ade put a proprietorial
hand on her back, steering her. He said absolutely nothing. He was just
comfortingly there.
"We have a word for that," Shan said. Ade was right; it
was none of her business, but she'd played
a role in bringing disaster to Cavanagh's Star and she never left a
mess for someone else to clear up. "We call it invasion."
The bowl of fried peppers was the first solid
food that Lindsay had eaten in nearly forty-eight hours. The sound of
Rayat's chewing irritated her and she couldn't work out why it seemed
so loud given the constant clamor of wess'har voices and clattering
glass in the warrenlike home that was now their prison.
She tried to shut it out.
"No locks," said Rayat. "In fact, no doors."
"So try walking out of here."
"Why do you think they haven't killed us?"
There was a sudden peal of trills somewhere in the
house, almost a shriek. Lindsay dropped the bowl and last few strips of
peppers spilled across the flagstone floor. Then the musical voices
resumed their normal pattern. A scent like fruit--peach, mango,
apricot?--wafted through the doorway. Wess'har always seemed to be
cooking something. Lindsay's stomach was still growling in response to
every aroma.
"Maybe the Eqbas branch of the family does things
differently." She picked up the bowl and scooped the peppers back into
it, unsure when the next meal was coming, if ever. Wess'har seemed to
be conscientious about clean floors so she ate what she retrieved.
Rayat, perched on one of the rock-hard recesses, looked down his nose
at her and carried on chomping.
"Got a problem?" asked Lindsay. She wiped her finger
around the bowl and sucked off the last scrap of oily sauce.
Rayat shrugged. "We were never much of a team, you and
I, were we?"
"No. Not any sort of team."
"What do you want to happen?"
"What?"
"Rescue? Return?"
"Die, and get it over with. I've lost my baby, I've got
nothing to go back to and I'd have to live with being a war criminal."
She checked the bowl. It was hard to see if she'd missed any liquid
because the vessel was brown and amber swirled glass--hard glass, the
sort that could stand being dropped, the sort that the colonists had
used to make the bells of St. Francis Church in Constantine. What was
happening to the colonists now? "And that's before I think about what
the wess'har and the isenj will do to Earth. No, dead's good for me.
How about you? I think dead would be good for you, too."
"I didn't plan to kill any bezeri."
"You didn't plan to completely eradicate c'naatat
either, did you?" She recalled his
anger when he found she'd let Shan step out of the airlock. "Asset
denial has a lot of meanings."
Rayat remained irritatingly calm. "In the right hands,
it could have been immeasurably valuable. But it's gone now. And we can
forget about Aras."
Gone. Right. But Ade
Bennett was here. What if he really did get homesick and want to leave?
No, Ade had an unshakeable sense of duty, just like bloody Shan
Frankland. And even if Rayat found out what he'd become, there was
nothing he could do about it, not here.
But she liked the idea of seeing the look on Rayat's
face if he ever found out. It was a little comforting scrap of childish
vengeance before she died, nothing more. And someone else could pull
the trigger, no grenade and no self-inflicted pain. She could just
about handle that. Shut your eyes, think
something profound, and try to go with some dignity. Yes, it was
almost a relief.
Rayat swung his legs off the ledge and ambled towards
the door.
"Where are you off to?" she demanded.
"Perhaps I can have a chat with someone," he said. "If
they haven't done their usual summary execution, perhaps there's some
room for negotiation after all."
Lindsay watched him walk through the opening and heard
his steps fade in the corridor. She hoped they shot him. What did their
weapons do, anyway? She'd never seen them fire one. They looked more
like brass musical instruments than weapons.
And there was no more sauce. She put the bowl down on
the ledge and sat down with her back against the wall and her eyes
closed.
A few minutes later there were footsteps outside again,
not the scrabbling dog-steps of ussissi or the thud of a wess'har's
gait, but the steps of more than one human.
"Is that you, Eddie?" she called. She didn't need him
to mediate for her. She wanted it all to end. "Ade?"
But it was Rayat who walked back through the door, and
for once his face was a perfect picture of shock.
Lindsay wondered what might be enough to shock a spy.
God, maybe he'd run into Ade. He knew.
Well--
But it wasn't Ade, and it wasn't Eddie. Rayat, stunned
silent, was staring at Lindsay. It was one of those moments when what
she saw didn't make sense, but she saw it anyway.
There was a gun to Rayat's head and holding it was a
nightmarishly emaciated figure with very short, scrubby dark hair in a
loose black uniform. The gun clicked, a good old-fashioned 9mm pistol.
"Okay, sunshine," said a dead woman's voice. "I haven't
said this for years. You're fucking nicked."
It was Shan Frankland. Dead, dead, dead
Shan Frankland.
Creatures without
feet have my love,
And likewise do those with two feet,
And those with four feet I love,
And those too with many feet.
THE BUDDHA,
566–486 BCE
Shan began slipping the 9mm pistol in the
back of her belt out of habit, and then found her trousers weren't
tight enough even with the belt on its last notch to hold it securely.
She slid the gun discreetly into her pocket. She didn't
want to ruin a grand entrance by letting it clatter to the floor down
the leg of her pants.
Lindsay probably wouldn't have noticed anyway. She was
still sitting against the wall, hands pressed flat on the floor and
mouth slackly open in classic theatrical shock. An actor might have
made a better job of it.
Cobalt.
Lindsay was everything Shan despised, the apparently
compassionate woman with short-sighted, pig-eyed self-interest buried
not far beneath her normal, reasonable girly veneer. Shan wanted to
hurt her, and badly. But she had information to extract.
She stood staring at Rayat, a man as unkempt and as far
from the image of a spy as it was possible to get. She'd never noticed
he had so much gray in his dark hair before. What was the rate of
violent exchange for genocide? A good kicking? Knee-capping? Holding
his head under water a few times--a lot of times? She'd done it all,
and
worse, and not one of those recalled acts gave her that light-headed,
throat-stopping sensation of savage animal release that made her feel
some score had been settled in the universe.
"Sit down," she said.
Rayat was looking her up and down without moving his
head, eyes darting, and he had never seemed to be a man who shocked
easily. She was glad she'd found his threshold. It was a childish
thing, but she'd learned a long time ago that a copper needed to know
how to make the right entrance. It often saved a lot of work.
"I said sit the fuck down."
Rayat paused for three beats before sitting slowly.
Shan meshed her hands, pushing her gloves hard back on her fingers
until the webs of skin hurt. His gaze settled on them for a telling
second. Oh, he's afraid I'm going to belt him.
No--he's wondering if he can pick up a dose if I thump him, the sly
bastard. He never gives up.
Shan swallowed her temper. "I've not been well lately,
you know."
"You stepped out the hatch," said Rayat.
"Nothing wrong with your memory, then."
"You stepped out the hatch."
"I think you already said that."
Rayat was doing better than Lindsay. She was still
sitting on the floor, staring, silent. "Just tell me how."
Shan spread her arms and shrugged. "Beats me. I expect
you already realized I'm not like other girls." She wandered across the
room. Unbidden, Lindsay placed her hands back against the wall and
edged up it. It was a clumsy way to stand when she could have knelt
first, but maybe she was expecting a boot in the face. Shan met her
horrified eyes. Looking cadaverous had its advantages. "You stupid,
selfish little cow."
"Oh God," said Lindsay. "How did you…?"
"Survive without a suit? It's the first minute that's
the worst. Want to try it?"
"Oh God."
"Too fucking quick for you. I ought to let the ussissi
shred you."
"Get it over with."
"Esganikan would rather I didn't. Not yet."
Neither of them had finished helping
with inquiries, as her old sergeant used to say. There were
helpful people, and there were people who needed some help to be
helpful. Either way was fine by her.
Rayat was made of sterner stuff than Lindsay, or at
least he seemed to think he was. Shan kept an open mind. He was
certainly managing to be more coherent.
"Okay, Superintendent, I know your record with
prisoners. You enjoyed your work."
"Don't flatter yourself," said Shan. "What was in your
Suppressed Briefing from Perault? Everyone knows what was in mine."
"Why does that matter to you now?"
"Good old-fashioned copper's need to know. What was
your primary task?"
Rayat looked through her. There was a definite shift in
his expression, as if it was part of a mechanism he'd adopted to resist
interrogation. Shan thought that if she were an agent who had no
further mission and no chance of escape or survival, then the last
thing left to preserve sanity was the satisfaction of thwarting the
enemy in some small way.
She could have beaten the answer out of him, given
time. He wasn't all that different from her, hanging on to his sense of
self in a lonely and frightening place.
But understanding him didn't excuse his crime.
Bastard.
She felt something primeval flare up from her gut and
the kick she aimed at him came straight from her subconscious. It
caught him under the arm, right in the ribs. He didn't even scream.
They usually did.
"Come on, you shit-house." He curled up instinctively,
hands shielding his head. The shock from the next kick traveled back up
her leg, and it hurt. "You can take me, can't you? You're trained.
You're hard.
What do you want? Want me to draw enough blood that you catch this
fucking thing?" She stamped down hard on his ankle because she couldn't
get at his balls. She was light-headed and it wasn't from exhaustion.
She'd tipped over this brink of rage before. "Get up, you bastard. Come
on, you murdering heap of shit--"
He rolled over on his back, gasping. "You're a--" he
began, but that was as far as he got because she didn't want to hear,
and she didn't want to argue, and she didn't want him to get up again.
She kicked him in the back and the kidneys and anywhere else she could
reach. She kicked him until she staggered to a halt with exhaustion and
all she could hear were his grunts of pain and--at last--her own
gasping
breath.
If she'd been fitter, heavier, she knew she would have
killed him. She'd come as close to killing someone before but she knew
when to stop in those days. Whatever Rayat knew didn't matter right
then. She wanted destruction. She loathed herself for that and wasn't
sure why.
She managed to haul him into a sitting position by his
collar so that his face was inches from her. "Do you know what you've
done? Do you fucking know?"
Lindsay was completely silent, watching them warily.
Rayat uncoiled and spat blood on the floor, white-faced
and trembling. But she couldn't make him scream. God, she wanted to.
"You're an animal," he said hoarsely. "And if you think
you're hard enough to beat anything out of me, you've got a long job
ahead of you, bitch."
"Then maybe I'll settle for just making you fucking bleed."
Lindsay was pressed flat against the wall, silent,
trying not to be noticed. Shan forced herself upright and walked out.
She got to Fersanye's door and Ade--made to wait
outside--caught her before she collapsed.
"What the hell happened?" Ade had a tight grip on her
arms. "Did he hurt you?"
"The fuck he did," she said. "I kicked the shit out of
him."
"Good for you, but--"
"But it wasn't for the bezeri." The realization crashed
in on her. "It was for me."
It was accumulated rage; rage at being set up, being
shanghaied, being used, being turned into a freak, being expected to
clear up everyone else's shit, freeze-boiling to the point of death and
beyond…and being caught between black and white.
So Rayat killed thousands. Aras
killed millions.
But she could still see the difference, just as she
could still feel that Perault's motive for consigning her here mattered
even though her wess'har side didn't
give a toss.
If Rayat thought that calling her an animal was an
insult, he hadn't understood her at all.
Human would have been
much, much worse.
Aras found the smell that Shan called forest
floor more than distracting. It came
close to unbearable.
It took him back to the time long before the first
humans came to Bezer'ej, five hundred years ago, when he huddled in an
isenj cell on an island called Ouzhari. The smell told him his jailers
were coming to inflict more tortures on him. He had looked much like
any other wess'har in those days. Minister Ual reeked of that scent.
"I never thought we would have this conversation," said
Ual. He lapped from a bowl of yeast broth. Wess'har busy drying sliced lurisj
in one of the courtyards paused to look
at him and then went back to their task. "Without our human friends, we
would never have had a common language to do so anyway."
Aras felt the skin rip from his back again. Murderer,
monster, child-killer. You don't deserve any
better. He ignored the insistent smell of wet leaves. "They have
their positive elements."
"Perhaps that's their purpose. A catalyst."
Aras had heard enough of purpose and pattern from
BenGarrod and his descendants. "We had reached a satisfactory
equilibrium before they arrived. Did their purpose include destroying
the bezeri?"
It wasn't Ual's fault. He hadn't settled on Bezer'ej,
and he hadn't tortured him. Aras couldn't understand why he was
experiencing this flashback so intensely now when he had lived with the
accurate, unchanging memory for so long. Shan had inherited the
memories. She'd reacted badly to them as well. He tried to shake off
the intrusive images because they were producing an anger in him that
wasn't his.
"Are you unwell, Aras?"
It was odd to hear an isenj call him by name. "No, I'm
remembering what your people did to me."
"You can also remember what you did to them."
"I can."
A white ball of fire rolled down
the street and the screams were deafening. He hid, calling for his
family when the silence fell.
But it was the memory of an isenj. And he could recall
his own astonishing survival when the prison was attacked and smashed
to rubble, and how his comrades couldn't understand how he had survived
such an ordeal. It had seemed a blessing, a vital advantage to share
with other troops when the small wess'har army faced millions of isenj.
Nobody had known what it really was in the early days.
They found out soon enough.
"Can you do for Umeh what you did for Asht? I
apologize--what you did for Bezer'ej." Ual
corrected himself, perhaps making a deliberate point that he could
accept massive cultural change. "And by that I mean reversing
environmental damage, not… reduction in population."
"Of course we could," said Aras. "But you must be aware
that you can't sustain the population you have and still restore your
environment. Do you recall any natural environment on your world?"
"We do," said Ual. "Our memories span generations."
"And where will you find the species with which you
once shared Umeh? Do you have a gene bank like the one the gethes
brought with them to Bezer'ej?"
"No."
"Then what can be restored?"
There was no answer to that: a Umeh rich in
biodiversity was a memory, no more than that. Ual lapped his drink
again. He was decorated with hundreds of small blue rattling gems that
caught the light. Isenj had always liked shiny objects.
Aras recalled the musty, sulphurous flavor of the yeast
broth. He had never tasted it but he had the memory, just as he could
relive the moment when a petrol bomb exploded against Shan's riot
shield or when she had beaten a criminal until she broke his bones.
"We need to find a way of reducing the pressure on
Umeh," said Ual.
"You must accept that there must be fewer of you."
"I have invited wess'har intervention. I had hoped for
a solution I might be able to… what's the human expression?… sell
to my people."
"I think you need to discuss this with Esganikan Gai."
Aras was remembering far too much now. His distant past churned up
again. His first isan, long dead by her
own hand, unable to tolerate endless life: Cimesiat and all his
comrades contaminated by c'naatat: and the
years in Constantine with the alien newcomers whose strange belief in
invisible forces had always managed not to conflict with the principles
of Targassat until now. "I find it interesting that we all spend so
much time letting the past influence the present, when it no longer
exists. We all let our personal World Before rule the world that is."
But there was a previous
time he wanted to find again rather than forget. He wanted to walk away
and return to some semblance of a peaceful life with Shan, and he had a
second chance to do that now. Eqbas Vorhi was more than capable of
taking on the task of restoring Umeh and even Bezer'ej. He'd done his
duty and now it was over.
But even now Shan was struggling around F'nar,
pretending she was fit and able to be the Guv'nor again. No, she had
done her duty too, and even duty was finite. Aras thought of the Baral
Plain, his birthplace, quiet and remote and truly cold in winter. They
could live there, Ade as well. Ade liked snow.
"Forgetting the past is a monumental task for a species
with genetic memory," said Ual. "But it's exactly what we have to do.
Most isenj will resist Eqbas Vorhi's help--will your people help me
convince them?"
Aras stood up. He couldn't stand the smell of decaying
leaves any longer. "Will you excuse me? I must find my isan."
He beckoned to Giyadas, watching them
from a discreet distance with unblinking yellow eyes. "The future
matriarch of F'nar will keep you company for the time being."
He walked home up the terraces, willing Shan to be
there when he returned. He needed comfort. His need made him feel
guilty because she was the one in need of care, but for the first time
in centuries he felt that he had lost control. When he opened the door,
Shan was sitting at the table while Ade stirred a pot on the range.
Aras could smell her distress. She wasn't bothering to
suppress it. Ade raised his eyebrows in mute warning.
"What's wrong, isan?"
"Nothing. I gave that shit Rayat a good hiding. And
what happened to you? I can smell you from
here."
"I spoke to Ual." He knew that would silence her. "I
haven't had a conversation with an isenj since I was their captive."
Neither Shan nor Ade needed an explanation. C'naatat,
for all its disadvantages, was also a
conduit for understanding. Ade had never mentioned inheriting those
memories but his reaction told Aras that he had. The marine ruffled
Aras's hair in that roughly affectionate manner of human males anxious
not to appear oversentimental.
"I'm sorry, mate," said Ade. He patted Aras's back a
few times and withdrew to the range to resume his cooking, a
house-brother in every sense but one. It had been a very long time
since Aras had felt that. He missed the intimacy.
"Did it help you?" asked Shan.
"It disturbed me. But it's done. I mustn't live in the
past when there's so much time ahead to deal with."
"They're going to invade Umeh, aren't they?"
"Eqbas? Ual has invited them, as we did, whether his
people want them or not. Let's see what happens."
Shan reached out and put her hand on his and they sat
that way in silence for a few minutes, not looking at each other.
"You're right," she said. "There's a lot to be said for clean slates."
Aras meshed his fingers in Shan's and tightened his
grip. Ade poured the contents of the pan into a bowl and set it on the
table with some mugs. It was very good soup.
"You're not a bad cook at all, Ade," said Shan. And for
a moment she looked at Ade in a way that told Aras he did not exist.
It was a fraction of a second, no
more.
Wess'har males can't be jealous.
And I want a house-brother.
It was just a random flash of silly human jealousy,
another facet of the gethes' greed for
more than they needed. C'naatat normally
dispensed with inherited traits that it found troublesome. Aras hoped
it would purge him of this one before it became intrusive.
"That's Mar'an'cas," said Nevyan. "The human
colony appears to be surviving."
"Why didn't you kill them all when they first tried to
land on Bezer'ej?" asked Esganikan.
The spray whipped up from the sea. Jon Becken seemed
comfortable steering the boat so Nevyan let him and knelt down on the
curved deck. Her dhren shaped itself high
around her neck against the cold northern weather.
"They were harmless in those days," she said. "And they
brought other species with them."
"This is the gene bank I hear about."
"They thought they could preserve Earth's life-forms
and then return them when the planet was fit to be restored."
Esganikan made an approving urrrr. "A
task we can perform. They aren't all despoilers, then."
Becken turned to Webster and Barencoin while he held
his hand above the controls to correct the course. The marines chatted,
either oblivious or uncaring of the fact that Nevyan could understand
them. Their conversation consisted of speculation about Shan's
survival, which they deemed fucking amazing,
and the weird shit Ade had got himself into.
Nevyan turned to them. "Yes, it is indeed fucking
amazing," she said, and her comment seemed to silence them. She hadn't
intended it to.
"Tell me more about the gene bank," said Esganikan,
glancing Barencoin's way. "In English."
"The colony brought it with them and Shan was sent to
retrieve the strains of edible plants for free distribution on Earth.
Human organizations make living things like food plants into
commodities that only they can sell to other humans."
"I am not sure I fully understand sell."
"A barter system. They license
seeds and even other beings, altered genetically so they can track and
control them."
"What do they exchange for food, then, if they have no
free access to food plants?"
"Labor."
Esganikan pondered the concept. "So they are
cooperative?"
"No, their entire society revolves around individuals
acquiring more than is necessary."
"The more you tell me about gethes,
the more I feel they are overdue for our intervention. And what about
the other life-forms in this bank?"
"Shan was sent to retrieve unlicensed food plants to break the
cartels. She had no orders regarding
other species."
Esganikan looked at the marines and then faced the bow
of the boat again. "There is no consensus among humans."
"No, they all believe and act differently."
"Then we should differentiate between them. We should
separate the gethes from those who can be
wess'har."
Barencoin appeared to take notice of that. Perhaps it
had some significance for him, because he looked annoyed. Nevyan
glanced at him and he turned away.
When they landed on the island the two marines Qureshi
and Chahal were waiting for them. They jogged down to the waterline and
exchanged slaps on the back and embraces with the three other soldiers.
Whatever privations they faced, they seemed content in each other's
company. Nevyan thought that their communal spirit was an encouraging
sign.
Nevyan had seen the colonists of Constantine when she
was stationed at the Temporary City on Bezer'ej with her mother Mestin.
The colony had never been a problem, quiet and absorbed in its pursuit
of strange invisible beliefs of noncorporeal life, and it was properly
invisible itself, buried in the excavated settlement modeled on Aras's
memories of his home city of Iussan. And then the harmless humans had
become gethes after all, true to their
nature, helping Rayat and Neville. Perhaps it was not possible to find
many wess'har among them.
Some gathered at the route into their camp of fabric
shelters. There were males and females, some clutching small children.
And they stank of misery. Nevyan knew an unhappy human when she smelled
one.
"I want the person called Jonathan who helped Joshua
Garrod enable the gethes to bomb Ouzhari,"
said Esganikan.
Nevyan wondered if they had understood her, because her
rapid acquisition of English had not included perfecting the accent of
a single-voiced creature. There was a collective murmur that seemed
like one moan of despair. It seemed that they had.
"If you don't fetch him, then you condone what he did,
and you will be balanced too," she said.
"Like every godless fascist regime that's ever been,"
said a man at the front. "Burn the churches, punish the innocent, show
others what happens to the disobedient. But God will judge you."
Esganikan met the reaction with an explanation, as was
proper. "How can you be innocent if you prevent what's right? This is
to balance the genocide of the bezeri. If you prevent that, you become
part of it. I have no wish to show anyone anything. I care only what
you do, not what you think."
They looked back at her, unmoving.
"Okay, I'll do it," said Barencoin.
"No, mate, that's where I draw the fucking line," said
Becken. "I'm not hunting civvies for someone to kill them. That's not
what we do." Becken glanced at Nevyan. He was a young pale man with a
badly scarred nose. "No offense, ma'am."
Barencoin slipped his rifle off his shoulder. "He knew
they were nuclear bombs, and if he hadn't helped Neville and Rayat, we
wouldn't be in this shit now."
"Yeah, Mart, and we helped the bitch too, didn't we? Or
you fucking well did. You landed the devices on the planet."
"Okay, I should have shot her and Rayat and had done
with it. But I didn't. So now I do things right. Okay?"
He stepped forward. The little rank of colonists looked
about to part and then closed up again. Esganikan watched, apparently
fascinated.
"Come on, hand him over," Barencoin said quietly. "They
mean it. Wess'har don't piss about, and you know that better than
anyone." He paused. "Anyway, Shan Frankland's back, and if you don't
fetch him now she'll come and drag him out by his balls."
The colonists stared at him. "She's dead."
"Well, she's not dead now," said Barencoin.
"She's alive? Alive?"
"Yeah, but don't read anything freaky into it, will
you? God wasn't involved. He's not taking calls, in case you hadn't
noticed."
Barencoin motioned with his rifle for them to let him
pass but they didn't move. He sighed and simply walked forward, and then
they parted.
Nevyan and Esganikan followed him. Nevyan found it
interesting that humans could be so compliant even when they
outnumbered their captors. There were around a thousand here and many
emerged from their tents to watch.
Barencoin cleared a path without even trying. He might
have been behaving in that way humans called bluffing,
but nobody seemed to want to test him. Nevyan thought she recognized
one or two of the colonists but it was hard to tell.
"Now that Joshua Garrod is dead, who speaks for you?"
she asked.
"Try his wife, Deborah," said a woman. "Or Martin
Tyndale."
She didn't recognize Deborah Garrod at all. The woman
seemed neither hostile nor afraid, and she had youngsters with her, a
small female and an almost fully grown male. She indicated the interior
of the tent. "It's cold out here," she said. "Can we talk inside?"
Esganikan ducked beneath the bar above the opening. The
tent was a chaos of fabric and boxes and stank of stale food. Nevyan
was aware of the young male's fixed stare.
"What's your name?" she asked.
"James," he said.
"You intend to restore Earth," said Esganikan.
"Our forefathers came to Bezer'ej for refuge, to wait
it out until the world was ready," said Deborah. "However long it took."
"And what do you want to do now?"
Deborah shrugged. "If prayers could be answered? To
turn back time. If not--I was going to say that we would like to go
home, but Bezer'ej is the only home we've ever known."
"Would you prefer to return to your homeworld?"
"If the time was right. If the purpose could be
fulfilled."
"We can make it the right time," said Esganikan.
Perhaps she was overconfident of her new language
skills. Nevyan watched her, baffled, a little hesitant because the
matriarch's dominance pheromone was so convincingly powerful, as strong
as her own and sometimes close to overwhelming her.
"How?" Deborah asked.
"You wish to restore your environment. That is what we
do, what we have always done. We can do it for you, and with your
cooperation."
There was something about Esganikan's effortlessly
clear focus that reminded Nevyan of Shan. This was a female used to
getting things done. But this was not her friend, not someone she knew
well and who had her interests and those of her city at heart: wess'har
or not, Esganikan was a stranger.
"Are you offering to take us back?" said Deborah.
"Yes, and the rest of the life from your world."
"And what about Jonathan Burgh?"
"He must be balanced."
"So ifwe hand him over the rest ofus can go… home."
"The two are not connected. If none of you hand him
over, then none of you will go home, because I will have to balance all
of you for complicity in his action. It is not a condition, nor is it
bargaining, because we do not make bargains. It is merely a
consequence."
"It's a fascinating distinction." Deborah thought for a
while, her head in her hands.
James glared at Nevyan and lowered his voice. "Are we
just going to let them do what they did to Dad?"
"The bezeri died, James."
"It was an accident. He didn't mean it to happen like
that. He was destroying the Devil's temptation."
"James, we became involved with weapons that we should
have shunned, and we're paying the price of tolerating violence. Don't
you think I miss him? Don't you think it breaks my heart too?" She
turned James around by his shoulders. "Go and find Jonathan. Tell him
he can choose whether or not to surrender. It's up to him. It's not our
place to make him."
Nevyan watched, fascinated by the ethical knots the
woman had tied and untied. Their logic was wholly alien to her. If
Jonathan acted for himself, then Deborah would be innocent of his
death. But he would still be dead. In the end, motives counted for
nothing but humans never saw it that way. They lived in their heads,
not in the world. Perhaps that was why they could never respect life
that wasn't like them.
She waited with Esganikan in complete silence;
Barencoin stuck his head through the tent flap a few times to see what
was happening and then withdrew. Nevyan walked outside and found him
standing in a tight group with the other marines, talking in a low
voice, rifle cradled in his arms.
"Who's going to do it, ma'am?" he asked.
"I think we've been here before," said Qureshi. "With
Parekh."
"It's not your responsibility to execute our prisoners.
We'll do it."
Esganikan wandered out to wait with them, effectively
stifling all conversation. From time to time she reached into her
quilted tunic and took out a hand weapon, a smooth dull blue cylinder
notched with small finger-shaped indentations to create a grip. Nevyan
watched the marines, wondering if they realized what the instrument
was. And they watched Esganikan discreetly. They weren't fools.
"There," said Qureshi.
James Garrod appeared out of the mass of colonists with
a man--a man with a gray and stricken face--trailing behind him. So
this
was Jonathan Burgh. There was nothing about him that would have helped
Nevyan single him out as foolishly obedient or violent or even
memorable. James kept his gaze on the ground and indicated Jonathan
with a gesture over his shoulder.
He looked as if he felt he had betrayed him. It was a
curious kind of morality. It seemed hard for humans to feel that same
shame for their treatment of beings who didn't look like them.
"I don't want to die," said Jonathan Burgh.
"Very few creatures do," said Esganikan.
She took him down to the shore. Nevyan stayed back to
make sure the marines didn't intervene, but they were discussing
whether they should stay on Mar'an'cas. Webster wanted to work on the
water and power supplies. Nevyan was impressed by their pragmatism.
There was a loud snap from
the direction of the shore, and then another. The camp fell silent. The
marines paused in their conversation too, and then went on talking in
slightly different tones.
"I could get this place running a lot better," Webster
said. She stopped a man walking past. "Look, do you want us to stay?
Can we get some of the solar plant sorted for you?"
"Get out," said the man. "We don't want you here."
"I love civvies," said Barencoin. "Ungrateful fuckers."
"Well, then," said Qureshi. "Our own government doesn't
want us and neither does this lot. Anyone for F'nar?"
Esganikan appeared again, tidy and unmoved. Except for
Barencoin, none of the marines would look at her. She cocked her head
and Nevyan followed her back to the boat. The vessel sat lower in the
water on the return journey, weighed down by two extra passengers, and
Becken took it a little more slowly.
"I like your friend Shan," said Esganikan. "I
understand her. She has clear purpose. She acts wess'har."
"And you seem to like the colonists, and I must say
that was not expected."
Esganikan flicked her plume of hair and faced into the
wind. She seemed to enjoy being in the open air: it might have been a
relief after a long enclosed patrol.
"They want an Earth that lives in balance, and so do
we," she said. "And that is why we will take them with us when we send
a mission to Earth. They have asked for our help. So we will give it."
We have released
the command codes for EFS Thetis so that
you can take control of the vessel and retrieve your personnel. The
ship is equipped to take up to 400 individuals in chill-sleep and we
will order evacuation of all FEU personnel from Umeh Station. We hope
cooperation can be resumed when the difficulties over Bezer'ej have
been resolved. In the meantime, we ask you to maintain an open
communications relay between our systems. We genuinely seek peaceful
relations with Umeh.
BIRSEN
ERTEGUN,
Foreign Secretary, FEU
Someone hit her. She couldn't tell who it
was but she threw a punch back anyway. And someone was screaming: a
woman's voice, shrill and sobbing, "Don't! Don't! Leave him alone, you
pig--"
Shan woke with a start and expected--oh no oh no oh no--to
see black, star-speckled space once
again.
Instead she was looking up at gathering clouds in a
fading blue sky. She rolled over onto her side and realized she had
dozed off on the terrace at the back of the house.
Shapakti stood at a careful distance. "I knocked," he
said apologetically. He rapped on the parapet wall, not making much of
a sound at all. "It was hard to find something to knock on."
"Nobody else in?"
"No Aras, no Ade."
Well, at least the two of them weren't worrying about
her any longer. She didn't like people fussing. It was six days since
Nevyan had brought her back and she was mobile and conscious and she
could take care of herself. As long as she didn't look at her body in
the shower, she was fine. A week, maybe two, and then she'd look a
little more like a survivor than a victim.
And then Aras might remember she was his wife, and all
that went with that. He was treating her like his child.
Shapakti waited patiently. "I came to ask if you wanted
to visit Bezer'ej."
"Yes, it's time I took a look."
"I know these things concern you. You were an
environment officer."
"I was a police officer. I
joined EnHaz late and I didn't do the science bit. I used to nick
people for pollution, breaching research guidelines, illegal
biomaterials, that sort of thing. Do you understand nick?
Arrest. Prosecute. Punish." Punishment
hadn't been part of her job since she was a uniformed officer on the
street, but she did it anyway. Sometimes the informal approach worked
best. Sometimes she was so informal that she'd let eco-terrorists do
the job for her. "And I'm still a police officer. I don't know how to
be anything else."
Shapakti made a cautious circle around her to get to
the doorway. "We have started to cleanse Ouzhari. A crew has landed to
carry out a survey."
Shan picked up the blankets and folded them, finding
herself suddenly in the mood for a large plate of something. She didn't
care what. She was ravenous.
"What do you actually do, Shapakti?" she asked.
"I am a scientist," he said. "I study how organisms
work."
"Ah, a biologist. Is that why you hang around me? Study
the old freak?"
"Do you find my interest offensive?"
"I'd rather you just asked me questions."
"I want to know about c'naatat.
We all do."
"You're looking at it."
"How does it make its decisions?"
"I think it treats a host like a planet. An ecosystem."
She had to use the English word: she had no wess'u for it. "Except it
takes a lot better care of it than gethes
would."
"Can you feel it?"
"No. I can feel what it does, but I'm not conscious of
it as an entity. Or a community." She had a sudden irrelevant thought.
There was no God, but if there had been one, maybe that was how he
operated too. He let humans fuck up because he was too big and too busy
to see the piddling small detail. "I try not to think of being
colonized."
She looked at her hands and there was more tissue
between the skin and the bone than there was yesterday. C'naatat
had preserved her brain, even if it had
to devour all her muscles and her fat to do so. Then it put back enough
tissue to make her mobile, to get her away from any threat. And then it
began bringing her back to normal levels of organ tissue and lean
muscle mass. If it wasn't smart and sentient, then it was doing a good
impersonation of it.
She flexed her hand in front of Shapakti, sending a
ripple of colored lights up through her fingers. He made a small
incoherent sound. It was a great party trick.
"I picked it up from the bezeri somehow," she said. "This might be
the last living trace of them. Ironic. You know they
made maps? Colored sand pressed between sheets of transparent shell.
Beautiful."
"We look for survivors anyway."
Shapakti moved back for every inch Shan moved forward,
and that wasn't like wess'har, who didn't know what too close
meant. "You think I'm dangerous, like
Esganikan does?"
"C'naatat needs to be
controlled."
"No, those who might misuse it need to be controlled.
Understand the difference?"
"Yes."
"Tell me, are gethes the
only species that behaves this badly towards others?"
Shapakti tipped his head slowly to the right. "No. But
you sound as if you would want them to be."
It was a sharp observation. Yes, she hated her own
kind. She knew that. She was the polar opposite of most humans, who
thought that Homo sapiens alone was
special: and she thought they were the only ones who were not.
She was going to ask Shapakti how he had
spotted that so soon, but she decided to leave it.
"You were going to teach me eqbas'u," she said.
"Humans learn language slowly."
"Tell you what, give me a shot of Eqbas blood or
something and see what happens."
Shapakti's pupils snapped open and shut in utterly
transparent curiosity. Shan was reminded what poor poker players
wess'har would make.
"I just meant blood," she said. "That wasn't a
euphemism."
"What's euphemism?"
"An indirect and less offensive way of saying
something. Don't think I'm offering you anything extra, okay?"
Shapakti thought about it. She could see it on his
face. There was a definite wess'har expression when they were realizing
something, a slow lowering of the head like a small animal gradually
nodding off to sleep.
"I have an isan at home,"
he said stiffly.
"Good for you, son. So you take a few drugs and you
don't need oursan, right?"
"Correct."
"That explains Esganikan's surly manner." One wess'har
word for surly was ussi'har, ussissi
behavior. "She didn't bring her jurej've
with her."
"She has none. She is a soldier. It would not be fair
to have family." He edged to the door. "I will come for you tomorrow."
Shapakti left, wafting sandalwood, and Shan stood
looking into the cupboard-sized bedroom she'd shared with Aras. It was
high time she moved back into it. Besides, Ade was confined to the sofa
as long as she was using his bed.
She had no idea why she was put there. She wondered if
it was Aras's choice.
"Sod it," she said. "That's my
bed too."
She dragged the dhren
offAde's bed. Beneath the piles of sek
fabric it was just a few broad planks of efte
wood laid on blocks. Efte grew on
Bezer'ej, fast-maturing tree-sized plants that shot to full height in a
few months and then deliquesced and drained back into the soil, leaving
behind sheets of fibrous bark that could be cut, felted, laminated, and
made into a hundred different materials. For the first time she
wondered if the wess'har had introduced it to Wess'ej. There was still
a great deal about their approach to ecology that she didn't know. But
it could wait.
What mattered at the moment was getting fit again and
trying to recover that state of relative contentment she'd reached with
Aras. For a make-do-and-mend relationship, it had been pretty good;
there was a lot to be said for necessity. She made up their bed again,
holding the sheets of fabric under the cold torrent of the shower spout
to wash them, and shook them dry.
Ade, ever the ultra-tidy soldier, had folded his
bedding neatly and stowed it in the single cupboard. It was just a
couple of camouflage sheets of thin DPM fabric, the sort you could fold
down in your pack and even use to make a bivouac shelter in the field.
Shan recreated his bed as best she could by wrapping the sek
blankets around the planks and finally
stretching the sheet drum-tight with proper military envelope corners.
She didn't have a coin to perform the old army test for
bed-making perfection, so she took a cube of brick-solid dried evem
from the larder and bounced it down hard on
the covers. It sprang back into her hand. She hoped Ade appreciated the
attention to detail.
Aras and Ade returned an hour later, muddy from working
the allotment and carrying sacks of vegetables. They seemed easy in
each other's company for the moment.
I never thought I'd see either
of them again.
Shan wondered why relief was so short-lived. When you
were in a terrible situation, you imagined that you would live in a
state of permanent gratitude if you ever escaped. You would never ask
for anything again, anything, ever, as
long as you could extract yourself from the shit you were in. You would
cherish all those things snatched from you and never let them out of
your sight again. But it wasn't like that. A sense of gratitude was
more fleeting than resentment.
Ade glanced at the open door of his room and went to
check.
"You've been a naughty girl, Boss," he said. "You
should leave the housework to us."
"I was bored," she lied. "Anyway, you can bounce a coin
off that bed."
"I noticed. Tidy job. Thanks."
She studied Ade's expression--cautious, anxious for
approval--and recalled the dreamed memory that she had been grappling
with when Shapakti disturbed her. It hadn't come from Aras. The vivid
tableau of violence had been conducted in English, a woman yelling at
someone to stop. She could guess a lot from that: it was Ade's memory.
For a moment she recalled something warm and wet on her
face like a spray of saliva, and she put her hand up instinctively to
swat it away. Then she felt her stomach roll with nausea.
Whatever that memory was, it wasn't good. And it wasn't
saliva, because she'd been spat at too often to mistake it for anything
else.
"I'm going to Bezer'ej for a recce," she said.
"We'll--" Aras began, but Shan interrupted him.
"On my own. I'll be fine."
"You won't like what you see."
"Funny, that's happened quite a few times in my career."
Ade rinsed his hands and made a grab for his jacket. "I've got to
sort out some billets for the lads," he said. His glance
darted between them. "Please, don't have a row about this, will you?"
Shan shrugged. "Of course not."
The soul of tact, Ade Bennett. He gave both of them an
uncomfortable smile and left. Silence flooded in after him.
"Want to say something?" she asked.
Aras was now accomplished at displacement activity. He
rummaged through the larder. "No, but you do, isan."
"I moved my stuff back into our bedroom. Are you okay
with that?"
"Yes."
"No problems sharing a bed with me again?"
"You're offended that I haven't attempted to copulate."
Sometimes the no-nonsense wess'har style wasn't what
she needed to hear. "Okay, I know I don't look too good right now."
"You're still frail. It's not appropriate for your
condition. I must care for you."
"I thought that we'd be relieved to be together again."
No, I don't need anyone. I really don't, remember?
"I just didn't think it would be this uncomfortable."
"These are early days. I thought you were dead. It's
hard for me to adjust too."
"You blame Ade."
"But you're back."
"And you're okay with him?"
"You spaced yourself."
"Exactly. It was my own bloody fault. I didn't have to
go after Lin and I was so cock-sure of myself that I didn't think
anyone could take me." The memory she had picked up from Ade's blood
was one of being violently abused. She wondered what she had triggered
in him when she lashed out at him, and she now knew why she felt
ashamed. "As long as you don't take it out on him."
Aras tilted his head slightly. "He's my brother. In
most senses."
Shan wrapped her arms round his waist and rested her
forehead against his chin. Theirs was an accidental relationship, a
blend of duty and sympathy, the sort that was based on pragmatism
rather than impulse; it was the sort she could trust. "I know this is
hard for you too."
"I wanted to use the grenade. Eddie and Ade stopped me."
"Oh, Christ, I'm sorry."
"It's in the past."
"Well, we're both going to find out what we went
through, aren't we? Swap-a-nightmare time." Oursan
was fun but c'naatat transferred memories
across the receptor cells too, the vivid ones that you couldn't erase.
"I think I've picked up some bad ones from Ade just from blood contact."
"I imagine a soldier with a violent father has some
very unpleasant memories."
Shan had never known Ade's background, but nobody who
fitted into normal family life would have signed up for a deployment
like this. She felt the punch again. She wondered what the splash of
warm moisture on her face might be and dreaded the revelation.
"You always got on before," Shan said.
"Will you prefer him to me?"
She jerked her head back. "Whoa, where did that come
from?"
"You felt pity and comradeship for me and you feel the
same for him."
"Hey, I'm not a bloody charity shop."
"If that's what you want, I'd be very happy to have him
as a house-brother. But perhaps human monogamy will make you choose
between us."
"Don't talk crap," she said. "We had a deal. I don't
walk out on a deal. And I'm not Lindsay Neville. I don't fuck someone
by accident or because I got tanked up out of my skull either, okay?
Don't you know me by now?"
"You said it yourself. You ruined Ade's life. I know
how your framework of responsibility operates, and I will respect your
decisions, whatever they are."
"You know what? If I had the energy, I'd storm out, but
frankly I can't be arsed." She stepped back from him, hands held up in
angry submission. "When I'm feeling fit, maybe I'll handle this better."
It was time for a walk. Her anger had been an asset in
her career, a savage dog let off the leash when she chose to free it
and send people running for safety. It had kept her sane in space. But
now her anger wouldn't come to heel. She didn't like being in thrall to
any emotion and that included passion.
She walked through the city feeling like a copper on
the beat again, a memory from a long and uncomplicated time ago,
acknowledging wess'har she recognized and those she didn't. This wasn't
Reading Metro. They didn't wrap themselves in defensive anonymity here.
And, like a copper, she knew that Ade had been lying--benignly--and
that
he wasn't sorting out billets for his detachment.
She'd find him. F'nar was compact enough to cover in a
few hours and it wasn't a place to hide, so she'd start with known
associates and affiliations--Nevyan's place--and work out from there.
Like Eddie, she could always find out what she needed to know.
In a world where there were few secrets to uncover, she
wondered what skills she might have to learn to occupy herself in the
very long future.
Eddie took a deep breath. He was afraid what he
would see.
"Okay, kid." He brushed his palm across the top of
Giyadas's rocking-horse mane. She had a skill he needed: she could
press the correct sequences into the ITX console simultaneously, while
he had to tap through them in laborious sequence to activate the image
in Nevyan's wall. "Let's see what's on the news, eh?"
"It will be depressing," said Giyadas.
Eddie heard his own phrases in her mouth. She was six
as far as he was concerned. Six-year-olds--even matriarchs in
waiting--deserved a carefree childhood, protected from concepts like
depressing news. But it didn't appear to dent her mood.
There were only two news feeds he could access via the
ITX now, and both were running similar images. They hadn't changed much
in three days. Apart from the sports and entertainment segments, they
spewed wall-to-wall unedited footage of troop movements along the FEU
borders with Africa and the Sinostates.
Eddie could hear the voice-over but he didn't want to.Unless the
FEU agrees to stand down and hand over
control of the ITX link to the UN so that global negotiation can take
place, the African Alliance is threatening to seize the FEU downlink
array at Amman. Sinostates president Yi says she will deploy troops to
ensure that the relay station is handed over to the UN undamaged.
The Amman relay was sandwiched on a finger of land
between the two superpowers. The Middle East had never been very good
at staying out of the crucible. Eddie exhaled and thought better of
sending 'Desk the images of Eqbas-held worlds that Ual had given him.
He'd abandoned all the rules of the game.
Self-censorship didn't matter any more.
"Why are they doing this?" asked Giyadas.
"So the other nations can talk to your mother and
Esganikan and…well, agree some kind of peace." Eddie rolled the words
around in his brain and they left him reeling. "If this has UN backing
then the FEU has to give in."
Giyadas appeared to be mesmerized by the sudden switch
to the studio. She tilted her head about as far as it would go,
studying the faces and prodding the console to switch between story
icons.
"There can be no negotiation," she said. "Why do they
think talking will change what must be done?"
There was no point panicking over the political
commentary of a child. But Eddie did, because this child thought as the
adult wess'har did, and the adult wess'har of two worlds had clearly
made up their minds that Earth was due for a visit.
"Can you get me my news desk now, sweetheart?"
Giyadas looked over her shoulder at him. "Is this just
pictures, Eddie?"
He didn't understand her question at first. He heard a
journalist's question; were there any interviews to follow? But then he
realized she was asking him something more profound. "For me, you mean?"
"Yes. What is real to you? Do you see your home at war?
Or do you see a clever film, something that makes you feel
accomplished?"
Shan had once asked him a similar question about Earth;
did the people back home see his reports on the war in the Cavanagh
system as a movie, massively distant and unreal?
It wasn't unreal now. And it was still at least
twenty-five years before they would see the unimaginable reality of an
Eqbas task force.
"I think I see a product," he said. "And that tells me
I need to stop doing this job."
He sat on the thin hard bench and stared at the
shimmering wall with its armored vehicles full of bots and an earnest
young major in a Sinostates uniform explaining that every effort would
be made to minimize collateral damage. Troops with a universal
expression that Eddie had seen on Ade's face and a hundred
others--wide-eyed, unblinking, brows slightly raised--stared from the
back of trucks.
"Okay, I've seen enough," he said. "Let's talk to 'Desk."
Giyadas played the console like a concert pianist. The
wall defaulted to smooth stone for a moment and then back to the news.
"I can't find your 'Desk."
He could see the transmission: the ITX was still live. "Let me have
a go."
Giyadas had a way of lowering her voice as if she was
talking to an idiot. "It's not there," she said. "The link has gone."
Eddie didn't disbelieve her, but he stood behind her
anyway and laid his hand on hers--cool, suede-like, utterly alien--to
move it to the controls he felt might yield a connection.
"See?" said Giyadas. "I am no fool."
The wall was flooded with an inappropriately peaceful
powder-blue holding screen. It simply said UN
PORTAL in the global and two subglobal languages--English
flanked
by Mandarin and Arabic.
The FEU had caved in, with or without armed conflict.
Eddie wondered what live footage he had not
seen.
Either way, he was now cut off again from BBChan, the
last remnant of what he called home.
We will return you to Jejeno," said Esganikan,
in passable English. "You may need protection from your fellows. Our
troops will accompany you."
Ual hadn't quite planned it this way. Ralassi seemed
not to be taking any notice and trotted around the ship's compartment,
examining the bulkhead displays with an Eqbas ussissi. Ual's fate
didn't affect them. Ussissi were beyond sectarian disputes.
"But it's unthinkable for any
wess'har troops to land on Umeh," he said.
"Then think it."
It was hard to tell if she was massively arrogant or
just finding her way through a complex and inexact alien language. She
was a big creature and she intimidated him. She knelt on a thick pad of
fabric, leaning forward slightly from the waist like a ussissi about to
spring.
"There will be a bad reaction," said Ual.
"If we don't land we can't help you. So we land and
help or we take you back and leave you. Either way, there will be no
further colonization of other planets by your people."
Know the enemy. There
were unspoken assumptions about other species that shaped the isenj
view of the world. Wess'har believed in balance and would not take
life. Humans wanted something in exchange for anything they gave, and
they wanted it fast, and they usually wanted more than was fair.
Ussissi cooperated with everyone but drew the line at choosing sides.
And nobody wanted to die.
Ual had not fully understood the Eqbas capacity for
taking you at your word and then refusing to deviate from their plans. I
asked them to help. Eddie had once told him a
human myth about having three wishes, and how careful you had to be
about the way you worded your wish.
"What form might your help take?" Ual asked.
Esganikan had that wess'har trait of suddenly becoming
absolutely still, not just immobile but frozen.
"You have problems feeding an increasing population and dealing with
the pollution caused by that. The first step is to reverse your
population growth." She dipped her head suddenly, the great plume of
red fur catching the light. "Normally we would begin reestablishing a
sustainable balance between species in the ecosystem, but as you appear
to have eradicated everything beyond food plants and marine life then
that presents us with problems. There is little to restore. Do you
maintain any genetic archive, like the gethes
do?"
"No."
"A pity."
"But Tasir Var is not entirely… urbanized."
"Your moon."
"Have you observed it?"
"We still assess Umeh from orbit. We will break a
vessel out to there soon."
Ual pondered break. Eddie
said the Eqbas ships split into sections. "You could take the remaining
native species from Tasir Var."
"Not an ideal solution, but at the moment I can think
of no other. Da Shapakti is the expert. His priority must be Bezer'ej."
If Esganikan knew it was called Asht then she was
refusing to use the isenj name. Ual accepted that Asht was now beyond
isenj reach; and he always had, even though his colleagues and the
electorate thought otherwise. Sometimes you needed to trade pride and
dreams for a safer reality.
Two Eqbas males entered the compartment and called up
wonderfully detailed images of Umeh's topography in the bulkhead. It
seemed as if the hull of the ship was a liquid sheet full of light.
"Do you have any means to limit your birthrate?" asked
Esganikan.
"Yes, but regions are reluctant to use it in case their
neighbors don't and they are overrun. We have never fully developed
such… unpopular medicine."
"Then we will create a solution that acts on all isenj
equally at the same time."
Ual hesitated. "What?"
"A medication. An intervention."
"But how will you ensure that all use it?"
Esganikan stood up and passed her hands across the
surface of the bulkhead, creating a closer view of Ebj, the Northern
Assembly territory. She put a long multijointed finger on a fine
tracery of lines.
"Is this part of the water grid?"
"Yes."
"Does every Umeh region have such a network?"
Ual began to see the Eqbas mind at work. "I would say
that twenty such grids serve ninety percent of the population."
"And the remainder?"
"They exist on more remote islands and have their own
extraction and pumping systems." Umeh was a world in precarious and
shifting equilibrium: discomfort was spread fairly, a necessary thing
in a crowded world that needed to defuse tension to maintain order.
"You plan to…intervene in the water supply, then?"
"It is the least drastic solution and the most
universal. You must all consume water."
"So you want me to show you how to access the regional
systems."
"All of them."
"Even Ebj?"
"As I said, we will treat all equally. We wish to be
fair, and your internal politics are not our concern." She cocked her
head. She seemed to be searching his face. "We have your DNA. Are all
isenj similar? If not, we shall need more tissue specimens."
Ual heard his beads rattle in an involuntary reflex of
quill fluffing. My tissue. My DNA. But he
concentrated on his duty. "I have not agreed to this."
"We will do it anyway." Esganikan dismissed the images
in the bulkhead with an imperial wave reminiscent of a human's. "The
alternative is culling, and that is an extreme measure, but we can do
that too, and easily, as there are few other life-forms to consider."
She glanced at Ual as if expecting a reply: she had odd shiny eyes like
a human, too, and the same flat featureless skin. "You don't want us to
cull."
Ual had to remind himself she was absolutely literal.
This wasn't one of Eddie's verbal games.
"No, but I believe your claim that you will do it if we
don't comply."
It was Eddie.
If Eddie had actively handed over that quill to create
the bioweapon or had done so from accident or innocence, the result was
the same. Asht--Bezer'ej was now out of isenj reach, and he was
secretly
glad of the removal of one more temptation to overstretch their
capacity. But he wasn't wess'har. He did
care about motive.
I rarely trust anyone.
But he was inexplicably hurt that Eddie might have done something behind
his back, to use the human phrase.
Esganikan did that rapid head-tilting gesture, side to
side, pupils dilating and closing into thin crossed lines.
"You misunderstand us," she said. "As long as you
remain on your own world and harm no other species in it, your problems
are yours to resolve. When you step beyond that line, they are ours."
Her English was getting better by the minute. "But your colonizing
missions are over. And they are over for the gethes,
too. You will both learn to live in balance within your own boundaries."
Ual reached down and snapped off a quill from among the
older ones by his legs, the ones set to shed soon. He took off the
corundum bead and handed the quill to Esganikan. This had to be a
conscious act, not a betrayal.
"If you need more," said Ual, "you may simply ask."
In his mesh of fingers, the bead glinted with blue
light. He would give it to Eddie. He left the Eqbas ship and prepared
to send a message to his mate.
The community of
Constantine colony wishes to return to Earth.
We will remove them from Wess'ej by your year of 2381 and
transport them to a location of their choosing
on your homeworld during your year 2406. We will also grant their
request of aid to re-establish the species contained in the Constantine
gene bank in their proper habitat.
This will mean
some rearrangement on your part. The transition will be easier if your
planet's administrations use the interim period to prepare for a
radical restoration of your ecosphere. Do not attempt to hinder this
operation. It is for the good of all species with a stake in your
planet. It will be carried out.
MATRIARCH
CURAS TI
to the UN Secretary General,
on behalf of the joint administrations of Eqbas Vorhi
"Holy shit," said Eddie. He inhaled a
chunk of dehydrated wheat sprouts and coughed until his eyes watered.
"Coming, ready or not."
He read the transcript of the Eqbas ultimatum several
times over breakfast in Nevyan's main room. The ITX link to 'Desk had
been down for ten hours. But he could still see the outgoing news feed,
and it reminded him that over the years he had slipped story by story,
interview by interview, into the position he was occupying now. He had
always been a tool for politicians, mostly knowingly, sometimes not.
The Eqbas statement wasn't an ultimatum. That implied
the unless factor. And there wasn't any unless about
it. Coming, ready or not…
Lisik was trilling tunelessly while he boiled a pan of
something red and slimy. Its fumes made Eddie's nose prickle. Giyadas
occupied herself in playing with Eddie's handheld, now retrieved from
Esganikan and with an ITX link to Earth built into it, courtesy of
Livaor. Nevyan seemed to have inherited a stable of impressively
capable males.
Serrimissani watched them all, turning her head sharply
from one to the other, as much the embodiment of a meerkat on guard
duty as he had ever seen. And this was a regular day. Invasion.
Breakfast with aliens. The end of my career.
Eddie had the recurring experience of standing outside
his own body and observing his extraordinary position; faced with
overwhelming novelty, his brain sought a familiar pattern and settled
on breakfast to buffer the experience. It was the split second when the
cinematic image of war in your viewfinder suddenly became personal and
aimed at you and you ran for it.
"What did you expect?" asked Serrimissani.
"More saber-rattling," said Eddie. "You'd have thought
I'd have learned the wess'har style by now, wouldn't you?"
"Two years is ample time to do so."
She came and went as she pleased in Nevyan's household,
disappearing most nights to return to the ussissi warren with its
little half-buried mud-plaster eggshell domes. Eddie could now see that
the Constantine colony on Bezer'ej had been built to a mix of two
architectural styles, the discreetly buried galleries of northern
Wess'ej and the domes of ussissi nests. He was fascinated by the
symbiotic evolution of two burrowing species, but his fascination had
to take a backseat.
Earth was going to get a personal visit from Eqbas
Vorhi.
It would happen in thirty years' time, but it was going
to happen and nothing was going to prevent it. The Eqbas had the same
literal finality as their clean-living Wess'ej cousins.
"I can't complain that I haven't had the best
exclusives in history," he said. He heard his own feeble reassurance.
"I mean, who else could run alien invasion stories live from the front?"
Serrimissani did her fox yawn, the little whining noise
followed by a snap of jaws. "I understand many of your colleagues have
tried over the years."
"I mean serious journalists with genuine stories."
"And you haven't transmitted any material about
Frankland's return."
"Okay." He hadn't a clue what to say about Shan, even
if he intended to run the story, which he didn't. He'd done enough
damage as it was. "I've succumbed to self-censorship again. Let's say
I've grown up."
Giyadas sat beside him and peered into the bowl. Then
she placed his handheld and screen in front of him.
"I spoke to a gethes at
the United Nations. She was alarmed."
Eddie's stomach somersaulted. He had no idea the link
was being answered. The kid hadn't said a word about it. Jesus, she'd
spoken to someone on Earth. "Sweetheart, did you say anything to scare
her?"
"I told her who I was and I asked which gethes
nations would live like wess'har and
which would not."
It was a reasonable question for the miniature adult
that Giyadas was. But if that call had gone straight through to the UN
shortly after the warning from Esganikan had been received, then it
might have sounded like a very different enquiry. It might have sounded
like who's going to be on our side and who isn't.
"What did she say?" asked Eddie.
"She said she would get someone senior
to speak to me."
He prodded the handheld with a cautious finger and
reopened the link. The image that appeared was an office with ornate
translucent furniture as if someone had decided to do the rococo look
in ice sculpture. Cherry blossoms were suspended within the back of the
glass-clear empty chair that occupied the shot. In the way of all small
incongruous detail, the pink petals seized his attention.
Then the chair was suddenly occupied, and a middle-aged
woman in a high-necked taupe suit gave a visible breath of relief.
"I'm Eddie Michallat, BBChan," said Eddie. "I was
hoping to speak to my news desk. What happened to the FEU Defense
Ministry portal?"
"Transmissions are being routed through the United
Nations now," said the woman. An ID icon sat at the bottom of the
frame: YULYA CORT, CRISIS LIAISON. With
a job title like that, Eddie thought, she was probably a light sleeper.
"May I ask who was using your link?"
"Giyadas…" He struggled for the wess'har naming
convention. "Giyadas Lisik Nevyan. I'm sorry about that. She's a little
girl. So you have control of outgoing ITX now?"
"Access is being allocated at the moment."
"A queue to use the phone, eh?"
"Sorry?"
"Old phrase. Doesn't matter." He gave her a pause to
talk but she didn't take it. He wasn't even asking her a question so he
made a mental note that she might prove difficult. "Would you mind
patching me through to BBChan Europe, please?"
"This is a relay for international community use. If we
open it up to the entertainment industry, it would become unmanageable."
No, doll. That's not the way
it's done, believe me.
Eddie rarely demanded what he could ask for as a favor,
but he felt it was time she understood his connections. "I'm not the
entertainment industry, as you call it. I'm a BBChan journalist. Now, I
could always ask this kid's mother to ask
you. Would that be easier? I'm her guest, along with the Eqbas Vorhi
advance fleet."
Cort appeared to think about it for a while; then her
right arm moved out of frame.
"I'll see what I can do," she said. The screen faded
out to the baby blue UN holding portal.
"What is it?" said Giyadas.
"Nothing," said Eddie. He was annoyed that he hadn't
been connected, but he had Ual, Nevyan and now Esganikan to exercise a
little influence for him. He'd wait. "Bloody jobsworth."
"She doesn't know how important you are." From anyone
else it would have been taking the piss. From Giyadas, it was a sincere
assessment. "You are one of us."
Serrimissani made a small ssss
that probably translated exactly the way it sounded.
Reporters weren't supposed to be important or one of anybody.
It was the final proof, if he needed
it, that he'd gone too far. He went back to his bowl of wheat sprouts,
reassuring himself that the meager supply of grain was far more
nutritious in this state, and suddenly realized the only person who
cared about him was an alien kid.
It had never hit him that hard before. Next week, next
month, next year, something would change and he would stop crashing
through bad and half-hearted relationships. But he never had: that was
why he was here, like the rest of them. He was someone with so few
emotional anchors on Earth that he could wrench himself out of time to
travel twenty-five light-years from home.
Even Shan Frankland--aloof and hard as a whore's
heart--had stumbled into communal domesticity. That told him just how
alone he truly was. Even Shan could get her leg over here.
He crunched thoughtfully.
"Will you return with the colony?" asked Serrimissani.
He hadn't even considered it. The news was happening here.
If he did, he would want to return to the
Cavanagh system because this was the most fascinating place he had ever
been and--the kid had hit the nail on the head--he was important
here. He couldn't bear the idea of all
this going on without being involved in it.
And by the time he got out of the freezer, everyone he
left behind here would be at least fifty years older. He didn't fit in
anywhere any more. He probably never would.
"I might stick around."
"Ual is returning to Umeh."
"He's a braver man than I am, Gunga Din."
Serrimissani didn't ask the obvious question and
continued undistracted. "He will have Eqbas to protect him."
"How? They've got a few thousand personnel, tops."
"Attack an Eqbas and see what retribution follows."
"How come everyone knows so much about them except the
wess'har here?"
"They don't want to know."
"But how can they avoid
knowing what they get up to?" Eddie had no concept of not wanting to
know something, nor any idea of how a technically advanced species got
to be that way without indiscriminate curiosity. He fumbled in his
pocket and pulled out the drab gray isenj data-player with the cube
still in it. "Have you seen this shit? Do
you know what the Eqbas have done to planets who've got out of line
over the years?"
"Broadly speaking, yes. We too come from Eqbas Vorhi."
"And? Is this okay?"
"Is it any different to what your powerful nations did
to those they could subdue and press into their mold, except that Eqbas
Vorhi is interplanetary in its reach?"
"No, but wess'har are supposed to be morally superior."
"So if a large human attacks a small human and causes
it suffering, then it is morally superior
to ignore their plight? And what if the attack was unprovoked?"
Eddie hated arguing ethics with her. He usually lost.
He was being sucked into an indefensible position: damn, that was his
job. "Define provocation."
"Do you tolerate cultural differences on Earth?"
"Yes."
"Even ones like stoning females to death for being
raped."
Serrimissani had done her homework. Eddie was more
convinced than ever that she was a natural journalist.
"That's an extreme example, doll. There are clearly
things that are unacceptable, and things that--"
"Clarity for you,
perhaps," she said, and her tone was very neutral, not at all her usual
hissing contempt. "Understand that we have
clear lines of acceptability too. At what point do you intervene? Where
is the line between cultural difference and unacceptable behavior? I
imagine your more barbaric communities feel their actions are
acceptable, just as you feel yours are."
Eddie unpacked the sentence and decided that was
exactly what it was: a sentence, but in the legal sense.
"Okay, you win. We're a species of verminous fucktards.
I still don't understand why the wess'har here can be so un-curious and
still have science and technology."
"Eddie, humans seem to have difficulty accepting that
others do not think as they do. Nor do they seem to want to try. That
shows a singular lack of curiosity in itself."
No, wess'har didn't think like humans. Eddie conceded
defeat and returned to his wheat sprouts.
"That was enjoyable," said Giyadas. "What may we debate
now?"
On the surface, wess'har behaved very much like humans.
Eddie watched Lisik drain the red slime and pack it into exquisite
scarlet glass jars that looked almost liquid in themselves, just like
anyone pickling produce for the winter. Cidemnet, another of the four
males that Nevyan had taken in when their own isan
died, walked in and checked flat trays of a white sponge sheet that
appeared to be drying on the planklike range. It was a peaceful scene
of domesticity.
Cidemnet prodded the sponge sheets with a stick of
brilliant amber glass and seemed satisfied. He broke some off into a
bowl and held it out to Eddie. "You try?" he said. Livaor, rinsing
fabric in a bowl of water, paused to watch the show.
Eddie dabbed the sponge with a cautious finger and
tasted it. It wasn't just pepper-hot: it was sour and musty and it
actually hurt.
"Cidemnet makes very good rov'la,"
said Giyadas, and took half the portion.
"I can tell," said Eddie hoarsely.
Cidemnet was also pretty useful with a fighter craft.
He had flown only one mission in his life and that had ended with CSV Actaeon
breaking up in orbit around Umeh and its
shattered hull giving Jejeno a spectacular meteor display. Eddie smiled
with all the will he could muster and chewed a small chunk of searing,
choking, foul rov'la.
No, they weren't like humans at all.
Ade was sitting on an outcrop at the top of the
bluff, collar turned up against the wind, rifle and Bergen on his back,
swinging his legs idly like a heavily armed schoolboy. Rain had started
to fall, making the day feel colder than it was.
"Who told you where I was?" he said.
"I can still follow a suspect." Shan's legs screamed
for a rest. She sat down beside him. "Nevyan said you had a little
bolt-hole up here."
"You shouldn't be out in this weather."
"Don't be so bloody daft." She held her hand out to
him, more of a hand-it-over gesture than a tender one. He hesitated and
didn't take it. "Get your arse back home and let's not have any more of
this crap." She wanted to tell him that he was a kind, brave and very
appealing bloke, and that she was pathetically grateful for his
devotion, but it didn't come out quite like that. "Come on, move it."
"I'm in the way, aren't I?"
"You come home right now. We'll work it out."
"I bet you said things like that when you were talking
someone down from a window ledge."
"No, I used to say, �Jump, you pathetic fucker, and
stop holding up the traffic.' "
Ade laughed. It was true but maybe he didn't realize
that; he seemed to think that she was wonderful, noble, heroic. She
wasn't. She didn't care about the rest of the human race. She cared
about him, and maybe she cared about Eddie at a pinch, but not in quite
the same way.
"So that's it, is it?" Shan looked down at the cairn.
The stones were all neatly graduated, big ones at the bottom,
decreasing in size as they went up. He'd put a lot of effort into it.
"Did many people turn up? Did they say nice things about me and talk
about my tireless work for charity?"
Ade sat with arms folded, chin down and eyes lowered,
and didn't answer.
"Sorry," she said. "I tend to forget that it's more
traumatic for the mourners than it is for the corpse."
Shan got up and gave him a few moments while she busied
herself studying the cairn's construction. There was something lodged
deep in the stones, a piece of fabric and metal. She worked her fingers
carefully into the gap to pull it out, realizing too late that it was a
singularly tactless act.
"Jesus, Ade." She spread the medals in her palm and let
the ribbons drape over the edge of her hand. Turkey, Macedonia, North
Africa; and the ACG and the Military Star. She had no idea that he'd
been decorated twice for bravery, but it didn't surprise her. It also
didn't surprise her that he'd never mentioned it. "I bet you didn't get
these free with your breakfast cereal."
Predictably, he blushed. It was one of those odd
contrasts with his roughy-toughy marine image that she found deeply
endearing. "Yeah, well…"
"If you brought them all this way then they must mean a
lot to you. It was a lovely gesture."
Just sometimes--and with less frequency over the
years--someone could get past her defenses. Ade did it all too
frequently for her peace of mind. He didn't look up but there was a
distinct citrus-tinged whiff of a wess'har male under stress. She
folded the ribbons round the medals, unfastened his battledress and
slipped them into the top pocket of his shirt.
"Sod 'em, Ade. Sod them all. They can't take it away
from you." She slid her warrant card out of the swiss. She still had a
real card: she always refused implanted technology. "And we have to be
more than badges."
She shoved the card between the stones. Superintendent
Frankland was gone, and she had to get used to being Shan, the person
she'd been cooped up with in open space when she couldn't move or
breathe or die.
Ade raised his eyebrows. "Like that's going to change
you one bit."
And that was another thing they had in common. It was
more than her healthy interest in his fit body and his charming
awkwardness. They had both found something of a genuine family in their
respective uniforms, and then politicians had taken that from them.
There was a sense of shared betrayal.
They took the easy way down from the bluff. It was a
tense walk back home and she struggled to make conversation.
"What was Ouzhari like when you were last there?"
Ade shrugged. "Bloody horrific."
"Oh."
"Yeah."
"Right…"
Ade walked on a few more strides and then sighed. "I
really thought that when you came back I'd stop feeling so bad about
things, but I haven't."
"For chrissakes, Ade, let it go."
"I'm trying."
"I fucked up your life with c'naatat.
We're even."
"My life was fucked long before you nutted me."
"Your dad?"
"Yeah, the shit-house."
"I think I've picked up your memory of him."
"Handy with his fists. He'd have a go at me and my
brother and my mum too, except she normally fought back and took a good
hiding for us when he was really tanked up. And I did sod all to save
her." Ade gave her an awkward nudge, the sort he usually reserved for
Barencoin or Becken. "You're a lot like her."
Ah well. Now she knew the
psychology of his devotion. "I'm sorry I lashed out at you. You don't
need any more violence."
"It's why I find it hard when women need help. I think
that's why I crapped myself when I had to rescue Mesevy."
She'd almost forgotten the incident. Sabine Mesevy,
drowning in the bottomless bog outside Constantine, sinking into slime
populated by transparent sheven that would
engulf you and digest you. Ade had gone in without hesitation. He'd
thrown up and also lost control of his bowels afterwards, but only
afterwards.
"I'd have let her go under," said Shan. "Like it or
not, it was heroic."
"I should have done more for my mum. I was the bloke."
"You were a child and your mother was an adult. She
chose to stay with a violent man." The silly cow,
being that emotionally dependent on a man. "Just drop the guilt.
You've got enough on your plate now without beating yourself up about
the past."
Shan had once thought of Ade as a medium type of man;
mid-build, mid-brown hair, mid-brown eyes, the sort of bloke you
wouldn't notice unless your business was noticing people. But she had
learned he was simply good at avoiding attention, a useful survival
trait in both a brutalized child and a professional soldier. There was
nothing mediocre about him at all. She thought of the time she had very
nearly weakened and succumbed to a quick and unromantic fuck on
Bezer'ej, and she realized she had spotted what he truly was from their
first encounter on board Thetis. He was
courageous, a real man by her exacting definition, and not because he
was fearless but because he knew exactly what fear was.
She tried again. "Are you getting on okay with Aras?"
"He's a pro." It was almost his highest accolade, one
degree short of fucking hero. There was
definitely a precise hierarchy of personal worth, climbing up from the
pits of shit-house through tourist, sound and pro
to heroic status. "A good mate."
"You've got a lot in common. I know that you and Eddie
kept him together. I owe you for that."
"Least I could do."
"You know what the isenj did to him, don't you?"
"He never said exactly." Ade had that look--a
compression of the lips as if stifling profanity and a fixed gaze into
middle distance--that said he didn't need to be told. "C'naatat
filled in the gaps for me."
Shan thought of something warm and gel-like hitting her
cheek. Maybe it wasn't the time to ask. "I keep recalling your being
hit in the face by something wet."
Ade looked blank, gazing ahead of him as he walked, and
then he screwed his eyes shut for a second. "Yeah," he said. He didn't
expand and she didn't press him, so she waited a few moments and
changed the subject.
"We need to talk about the domestic arrangements." She
couldn't bring herself to say it. She had to. "Aras is afraid I'll
prefer you to him."
"Oh." Pebbles crunched under Ade's boots. The S
word had still not intruded in the
conversation. "I didn't think wess'har were jealous."
"Polyandry's natural for them. He's just worried about
being alone again."
Ade nodded, eyes fixed straight ahead. "That's all a
bit exotic for me."
He knew what she meant, then. "Okay, I read you wrong."
Ade swallowed audibly. "No. You didn't."
"Changed your mind?"
"No."
"Okay. When you're up for it, just ask."
Ade slowed to an ambling pace. He was blushing again. "You ever
fallen in love?"
"No. Loved eventually, but never fallen."
"I didn't think so." He walked on.
This was why Shan felt comfortable with wess'har. There
was nothing you could say that sounded gauche or clinical to them. Just
the facts, ma'am: either something was so, or it wasn't, and nobody got
embarrassed. But Ade did.
And so did she. "Sorry. This comes from never having to
beat men off with a shitty stick. I never learned to do this right."
"It's okay. You're just like a bloke, really." He bit
his lip, his face a caricature of instant regret. "I didn't mean it
like that. I meant that I don't have to guess your mood or explain what
my job's like… shit, I'm really fucking this up, aren't I?"
"Yes. You can stop digging that hole now."
He put his hands over his eyes in mock exhaustion. "Jesus, I wish I
was good with words. Please don't laugh at me. I know
I'm not clever."
She dug her nails into her palm to stop a smile
crossing her face because he wouldn't have understood that she found
him touchingly innocent rather than ignorant. "I'm not laughing. And
you're not stupid."
"It was Dave Pharoah."
It was an almost wess'har non sequitur, a sudden leap
from one subject to another just as Aras did. "What was?"
"The splash on your face. Corporal Dave Pharoah. My
oppo. He was a daft sod, Dave. I got my tattoos on a tat run with him
when we were completely hand-carted on rough cider. He bet me I
wouldn't have a tattoo done in a really painful place." Ade managed a
rueful smile. Then it faded. "He got shot standing right next to me at
Ankara and his brains went all over my face. I didn't realize what it
was at first. I thought it was bird shit."
Shan wanted to say she understood but she knew she
didn't. For all the violence in her job, she had gone home at the end
of a shift, selected a menu from the catering service, and cleaned her
9mm. She had never been under fire for days or weeks and she had never
wiped a comrade's brain tissue off her face. When you thought you were well
hard, to use Eddie's phrase, it was always
sobering to realize there was someone who had experienced far worse
things than you had.
She patted his back slowly. "Sorry I brought it up."
"It goes with the job. You know what you're in for when
you sign up."
No, you don't. You couldn't
possibly. "I'm still sorry."
"Anyway, I had the tattoo done and it hurt all right."
Ade kicked a pebble into the air and caught it in one hand, apparently
unaware of how impressive that seemed to her. "If I miss people now,
what's it going to be like when I outlive everyone?"
"I think we'll both find out around the same time,"
said Shan, happy to be counted as one of the boys again.
You've dragged
the rest of the world into this and we're going to have aliens landing
here in thirty years. Plenty of time to come up with a solution? No.
The population is going to panic now, and
they're going to blame us. I'm going to make the Eqbas an offer,
because I'm not entirely convinced that they're the enemy. I think the
enemy is standing right in front of me.
CANH PHO
Prime Minister of the Australasian Republic
in a private conversation with Birsen Ertegun
The island of Ouzhari,
Bezer'ej.
Shan walked along the shoreline of
Ouzhari, suitless and bewildered.
She had never seen the island in its unspoiled state
and maybe that was just as well. Many crime scenes during her career
had made her punching mad, and a few had even reduced her to private
tears, but the scene of desolation notched up a new category: she was
numbed.
Esganikan and Shapakti walked at a discreet distance to
her right, in environment suits that were soft and flowing like
translucent shrouds. She could see them in her peripheral vision. Maybe
it had been a bad idea to forgo the suit, but she didn't need one. It
crossed her mind that it emphasized to the Eqbas that she was a freak
to be controlled at all costs.
She squatted on the sand, elbows braced on her knees
and hands clasped. What did you say? What could you even think? She
tapped her thumbnails against her front teeth, pondering the enormity
of the blast.
"Are you praying?" asked Shapakti.
She could hear him well enough, suit or not. "No. And
if I thought there was a deity listening I wouldn't exactly be praying,
either."
She stood up and walked further along the shore,
stepping carefully over unidentifiable patches of decayed matter that
might once have been bodies. She hadn't even expected bacteria here.
But something had already returned to profit from the carnage.
They're bezeri. They're people.
She was ashamed that she had to remind herself of that,
only feeling the revulsion on an intellectual level rather than an
instinctive one. There were nonhuman animals she reacted to instantly
at a gut level and those that she had to think about. It doesn't
matter. It's what you do, not what you feel
that counts.
Esganikan said little. She kept an eye on the survey
teams, one of them busy carrying out test bores into the soil and the
other on a bizarre floating platform that looked for all the world like
a glass raft. Shan had no idea why it wasn't swamped by the waves. It
had no gunwales that she could see, and large shallow containers didn't
remain stable once they took on a little water and it started slopping
around. But the Eqbas team of four stood calmly on the transparent
platform as if it was solid ground, with their hands clasped against
their chests and looking down at something. As bizarre as it looked, it
was simply the wess'har equivalent of standing with hands on hips, a
comfortably relaxed pose.
Then they all stepped back in one synchronized
movement. A column of dull glass rose from the deck of the raft. For a
moment Shan thought it was part of the steerage or even the head of a
drilling mechanism, but it wasn't. It really was
water, seawater, somehow lifted intact from the ocean beneath.
One of the Eqbas--a male, by the smaller build--inserted
a thin rod like a stylus into the column at waist height and studied
it. His head tilted sharply. Then he with drew the rod and reinserted
it near the base of the column. There was more vigorous head-tilting
and the column rose higher, an impossible tower of water with no
visible support rearing above a raft that shouldn't have been floating.
Shan was transfixed.
The column was at least five meters high now, and the
whole team was indulging in that head-tilting that said something had
completely engrossed them, something they weren't expecting.
"What are they doing?" she asked.
Esganikan stood beside her. When Shan turned, the Eqbas
matriarch was staring at her and not at the bizarre spectacle on the
glass raft.
"They're testing the sea at different depths to assess
contamination and biological activity."
Esganikan was standing so close that Shan felt an urge
to shove her in the chest and nick her for looking
at her funny as Rob McEvoy called it. Rob, her bagman, had been
a young inspector who she was grooming as a successor. Rob. Is he
still alive? She'd never returned his
message. She'd forgotten him. It appalled her. She'd make that a
priority.
Esganikan stepped back one pace. Shan could taste her
own scent of dominance, enough to keep the Eqbas commander in her
place. Esganikan could obviously smell it too, even in her suit.
"Did you acquire your jask
with your wess'har genes or have you always been this way?" she asked.
"I'll show you my file," said Shan, and didn't budge an
inch.
"I know who you are and what your task was."
"Is." Shan was distracted
by the raft again. It was moving away. "I haven't finished it yet."
The raft was moving fast, and not like a vessel
trailing spray or dipping and rising through the waves. It was simply
moving, level and utterly unnatural. There was no sign of wind whipping
the crew's loose suits and for a moment Shan's brain told her she was
watching a camera shot, a zoom out from a static scene.
"They're in a hurry."
"They have detected something." Esganikan paused as if
listening. "It may be another false reading. They found something that
looks like the waste products of bezeri in minute dilution."
"Survivors?"
"Or more recently dead."
Shan looked round and watched the land team for a
while. They were simply taking core samples with a tube that looked
much like the one used by Olivier Champciaux, the geologist who'd been
part of the Thetis team. He was another
person she hadn't thought of in a while: all the remaining payload, as
the marines had called the mission's scientists, were at Umeh Station. All
except the dead ones, anyway. And Rayat.
"What were you doing when they diverted you here?"
"We were returning from a patrol at Harsa. I believe
Shapakti's crew was assessing environmental imbalance on Nem Ijot.
Neither of us are ideal for this situation, but we could reach you far
more quickly than those with more specific experience."
"You sound experienced enough to me. Did you want to go
home?"
"I did. But this was a vital mission."
"Ironic. That's how I ended up here, too."
Esganikan might have understood or she might not, but
now she kept a respectful distance from Shan--still too close for a
human's comfort, but distant by wess'har standards--and walked with her
to where Shapakti stood with one of the core sampling teams.
"Can you decontaminate the area?" Shan asked.
Shapakti had a handful of soil cupped in his palms. "Yes. A season,
perhaps two."
"That's impressive."
"It is routine work. But we had hoped there might be
biological material we could use as a template for reconstruction."
"The grass." Shan used the English word. She didn't
have the wess'u for it. "Black grass."
"What?"
"There was black grass here. A plant that covers the
ground. Aras talked about it. He restored the island after the isenj
were driven off it."
Shapakti rubbed the soil between the palms of his
gloves. "He had material to work from."
"At least it's just Ouzhari." Yeah,
that's clever, you stupid cow. It's just Antarctica. It's just the
Galapagos. It's just the bezeri. "I meant that the damage is
localized. It could have been worse."
"Not for the bezeri."
The bore team stood around their drill, waiting, and
then Shan realized their rig was nothing like Champciaux's after all.
What she had thought was a solid shaft was a column of soil easing out
of the ground in the same way as the inexplicable column of seawater.
One of the group took a flat sheet of transparent material about the
size of a drinks tray and passed it through the column, which somehow
remained intact.
"Does he whip off a tablecloth and leave the plates in
place for an encore?" Shan asked, but she had slipped back into
vernacular English that defeated Shapakti. "What's he doing?"
"They are examining the soil under great magnification."
"With that thing?"
Shan had a nodding acquaintance with laboratory
equipment and no more. She nicked the polluters, the dealers in banned
biomaterials, the companies who crunched one gene sequence too many: it
was up to the boffins to sort out the detail. The Eqbas held the sheet
in his hands and studied it as if panning for gold. When she walked up
behind him to look, it was suddenly obvious what the sheet was.
She was looking at an image that could have come
straight off an electron microscope, and it might have been grains of
soil or bacteria. The magnified image covered the entire surface of the
sheet. "Now that's serious kit," she said.
"Whatever it is."
The scientist holding the sheet touched his glove
against the surface and isolated a single shape that made her think of
a radial hairbrush. The transparent sheet was busy overlaying it with
different images at a breakneck speed, blurring its outline.
"Pollen?" she said. She didn't even know if grass here
produced pollen. It was too easy to see familiar shapes and assume that
meant familiar biology.
"I don't know," said Shapakti. "We have never seen this
before. It bears no resemblance to anything from our databases. May I
take a sample from you?"
Shan rolled back her sleeve and held out her arm, which
was now showing muscle, although nowhere near at her normal levels. He
wants to rule out contamination by my cells,
she thought. It was basic forensic procedure, and she felt a sudden
nostalgic kinship with another investigator.
Shapakti pressed a gloved finger against the skin of
her forearm and studied the tip, then dabbed it on the glass tray. Shan
had no idea how he could separate a specific sample from the general
contamination he picked up on his gloves, but it seemed that he could,
because images began moving again on the surface of the tray. It was
dauntingly advanced technology. Shan thought she might sit quietly in a
corner with a flint and a few bits of straw and try to discover fire.
Shapakti shuffled his boots and pointed at the tray. "See. What you
have within you is the same as this."
The hairbrush images shuffled, distorted and lined up.
Then symbols that she didn't understand arranged themselves in a
cluster at the top left of the sheet.
So this was c'naatat. Shan
studied it, not really knowing what she was looking at but transfixed
by it nonetheless, and suddenly alarmed that he could obtain a sample
from unbroken skin. "Can you enlarge it?"
Each bristle of the brush resolved into more brushes,
complex and never-ending as a fractal. This was the organism that had
remade her--once, twice, three times at least. It had decided she
needed
claws, and changed its mind: then bioluminescence, but that satisfied
it. And it had taken a fancy to the ability to see shades of blue that
only wess'har could see, and the dubious gift of isenj genetic memory,
and scent communication, and things she couldn't even begin to guess at
because they hadn't made themselves known to her yet.
And it had kept her alive in space.
"Poor little sod," she said to herself, even though she
didn't like to think of it as being conscious of its actions. Maybe it
was. For now, it was a virus, or a bacterium, or an ultra-benign
disease; anything but a decision-making creature. "You don't look like
any trouble at all."
"We will still exercise caution," said Shapakti.
"I don't think it can do much harm now."
Shapakti held his arms slightly away from his sides as
if he had touched something especially messy. The bore team was
suddenly very still and so was he.
"It is not dead," he said.
The Pacific Rim
States and the African Assembly today issued an ultimatum to the
Federal European Union to end its deep space exploration program
"immediately and indefinitely" or face armed intervention.
The demand,
thought to have the tacit support of the Sinostates, follows
yesterday's shock revelation that EqbasVorhi intends to land on Earth
in thirty years'time. "I might be dead by the time that happens but my
kids won't be," said UN delegate Jim Matsoukis. "If we stop this insane
colonial adventuring right now we might avert an unprecedented
disaster."
It's not yet
known if the FEU will give in to pressure to recall its warship
Hereward, still heading for the Cavanagh's Star
system. "We still have people stranded out there and we won't abandon
them," said an FEU spokesman.
BBChantext 1667. See UN debate live at
1800 EUST.
"He should have known," said Shan.
Esganikan walked with her, a rare study in matriarchal
patience. They had trailed up and down the Ouzhari shoreline for a
couple of hours, stopping to look out to sea as the afternoon wore on
and the rest of the survey team trailed back to the ship to eat. Shan
could see it from the beach: a luminous copper cylinder, its shape now
more like an igloo with an entrance tunnel, with waves of faint light
shimmering across its hull as the automated decontamination system
swept it clean of radiation. Shan could walk here with impunity but it
was still a dangerous, poisoned place for all other life.
Except c'naatat.
"I don't understand why this makes you angry," said
Esganikan. "An organism has survived. The situation is not completely
desperate."
Shan jerked her thumb over her shoulder at the lifeless
beach behind her. She fell back on English. "It's a fucking barbecue
here. What's not desperate?" Esganikan
stood impassive and silent. Shan concentrated on wess'u again. "Sorry.
Not only is this as bad as I could imagine, but the bezeri died for
nothing. And Rayat is a scientist. He knows that even some terrestrial
bacteria can survive radiation. This was a big, sloppy, stupid gamble.
Look." She held out her arms, flipping her hands over and back again to
demonstrate them. "I'm probably here now because some bacteria have a
talent for surviving anything."
Esganikan brushed something from her soft environment
suit. It reminded Shan of a burqa.
"I learned your language in days, but I will never
learn how you think. This is all irrelevant."
"Maybe I'm not wess'har enough to feel that way."
"You desire balance. That is what police require, isn't
it?"
"Yeah, and we don't often get it."
"And what if the survey team find bezeri still alive?
Will that anger you too?"
"Have you got Aras's signal lamp?"
"Yes."
"Then if you find any, tell them Shan Frankland is
sorry--again. I bet that's the one English word they don't need
translated by now."
Esganikan went back to the ship. Shan sat down
cross-legged on the sand to wait for the glass raft to return, suddenly
aware she was probably sitting on organisms that had changed her life
beyond human recognition. She picked up a handful of soil and sifted it
between her fingers.
Shapakti approached her, giving her a wide berth like a
nervous beekeeper in his loose pale suit and veil. Everything that
wess'har made, even the sinister stuff like weapons and biohaz suits,
had a certain functional elegance.
"You haven't eaten." Shapakti's agitation made it clear
he didn't want her to get the wrong idea about his offer of food. It
wasn't a sexual invitation. "Aras insisted that I make you eat
regularly. Come back to the ship."
"I have to decontaminate first or I'll make you all
light up. Can't be arsed at the moment"
"Is that a refusal?"
"Yes, it is."
"I will bring food to you, then."
"Don't worry. You're perfectly safe, mate. You're not
my type." She saw his pupils snap from four-petaled flower to cross
wires even behind the suit's draped visor: he might have been working
out what mate meant and fearing for his
honor again. "Would you do me a favor? Before we leave, can I visit
Constantine?"
"Of course. You can go now if you wish, while we wait
for the others to return."
"How? I could walk, but it's a hell of a long way."
"What?"
"I can't drown. I've done it. I walked into the water
and visited the bezeri. Can't say I enjoyed the sensation, though."
"It is indeed a long way to walk, especially in your
condition. I will find a vessel."
He beckoned to her and she followed him back to the
craft. Two years alongside utterly alien technology had raised her
amazement threshold and she was expecting some part of the small craft
to detach itself and form a boat or some other form of transport. But
Shapakti simply opened a hatch in the igloo-ship's tunnel of an
entrance lobby and removed a milky smooth cube thirty centimeters
square.
"What's that?"
"You called it a raft. A niluy-ghur."
"Oh, this is going to be one of those conjuring tricks,
isn't it?" She had once watched a wess'har take a simple jointed stick
and snap it into a frame that made a stool. Working surfaces emerged
like protoplasm from hard flat walls: metal waste biodegraded in hours.
Wess'har were good at manipulating two things--solid materials and
cells. "White man's magic. Go on. Surprise me."
Shapakti placed the cube at the water's edge and it
unfurled itself like an emergency life raft, first folding out into a
flat transparent blanket of gel and then becoming rigid. The sea lapped
at it. It slid obediently into the water to form a solid platform with
one edge still on the beach, and Shapakti walked onto it and stood
waiting.
Shan put one foot on the raft. She would have felt
safer if she'd had her old boots. It didn't feel quite the same world
in the matte gray ones that an anonymous benefactor in F'nar had
fashioned for her, even though they were superior boots, silent and
thermally perfect and self-cleaning, and they shaped themselves to
whatever height and fit she wanted them to be. But they didn't go with
the remains of her uniform and they didn't announce her arrival. She
missed her old boots.
The raft was rock-solid and didn't move when she put
her full weight on it like a boat would have done. As soon as she was
inboard--if standing on a glass sheet could ever be considered
inboard--it moved away into the shallows and out to sea. A column rose
out of the surface in front of Shapakti, a plinth of glass-clear
material, and images danced in its top layer almost like the virin
communicator Nevyan had given her.
Shapakti touched the column and the raft began making
speed. If Shan hadn't already seen the vessel in action, she would have
abandoned ship there and then. There was no undulation or feeling of
the wind in her hair, and she could easily have been standing on an
immobile solid floor while the ocean and the landscape moved around and
past her and under her like a disturbingly
good simulation. No water slopped over the bows, such as they were. And
she was looking down through the water between her feet. Weed and other
unidentifiable debris churned up by the raft's motion roiled in a space
trapped between the ocean and the bottom of the hull.
"Tell me this thing doesn't fly," she said.
"Why?"
"I meant that humans don't cope well with seeing the
ground a long way beneath them, even if they're on a solid glass floor.
They always think they're going to fall."
"You survived in space. You coped well enough."
"Yeah, but I don't want to do it again."
"And it could fly if we
were to modify it."
Landing on Bezer'ej for the
first time: Ade Bennett closed the hatch behind her and she was looking
through the transparent section of the shuttle's hull as the AI took
over and tipped her out into space. It felt like a long and terrible
fall. Her stomach rolled. Shan shook herself out of the memory
and put out her hand to steady herself even though there was no
movement. A glass column flowed up from the deck to meet it.
It was faintly warm and yielding, like a layer of
insulation over steel. "You do like your glass," she said. "Glass
utensils, glass drains, glass bells. Glass people."
"You like to be able to see through things, Shan
Frankland. So do we."
Shapakti brought his heel down hard on the deck and it
extruded a glass booth around him. He slipped off his biohaz suit and
the raft swallowed it, sealing it into the deck in a bubble. "Now you,"
he said. He kicked a booth into place around her. It felt like being
shrink-wrapped for market. "Or you will take contamination to
Constantine."
The seascape streaked past them, spray and wind held at
bay by barriers that she couldn't see. She checked the time on her
swiss. Constantine, a hundred miles north of Ouzhari at the top of the
chain of islands, was now in sight. The raft must have been making at
least ninety knots and yet there was still no sensation of movement.
She stepped off the raft onto a familiar beach and it
was suddenly and unexpectedly heartbreaking.
A perfectly spherical stone inlaid with intricate
patterns of color stood at the high-water line. It was the Place of
Memory of the First, the memorial to the first bezeri pilot who beached
himself to gather information about the Dry Above.
"You know what this says?" she said. Shapakti studied
the patterns, just as she had studied them when Aras first showed her
the stone. "It says that the nineteenth of the
shoal of Ehek launched himself out of the water and told the waiting
ones all he could see of the Dry Above before he died an honorable
death. A suicide mission. After that they developed pod ships
with water jets that propelled them back into the water. It was like
the early days of space flight to them."
Shapakti followed her down the beach to another large
stone memorial, this time a conical one with lines of color spiraling
down its sides. Shan patted it. "The Place of Memory of the Returned.
The first bezeri who came ashore and made it back. And now they're all
gone."
"Perhaps not all." Shapakti stroked his long
multijointed fingers over the inlaid stone. "There were several hundred
thousand."
"And what if you find a few? A hundred? A dozen? It
took them centuries for their population to recover last time and they
started out with a lot more. And how can they rebuild?"
"Humans were reduced to hundreds at one time in their
evolution."
"And that's a role model?"
"I merely offer a positive future."
"You know what?" Shan began walking up the beach,
shaking off memories of when she thought she'd be off Bezer'ej and
heading home inside a year, back to a quiet retirement with a garden
full of unregistered tomato hybrids. "If you find any bezeri, we should
let them have Lindsay Neville. And Rayat. Their call."
Constantine, the Mountain to the Dry Above, was
returning to its wild origins. The blue and amber grasses had crept
back over the site where the Thetis
mission had made its camp. Even the recently abandoned fields of the
colony were already being overrun by island species. Without the
invisible biobarrier that contained the colony and allowed a
terrestrial ecology to exist, the crops were dying.
It was a glimpse of the fate that would have befallen
the Constantine mission nearly two centuries before had an exiled alien
soldier called Aras Sar Iussan not intervened to help them survive.
Shan had worked in those fields for a few months. She
walked back through them towards the underground colony, looking for
the discreet skylight bubbles that blistered the landscape, but she
couldn't pick them out. She was right on top of the colony before she
saw it.
At the top of the ramp that led down into the excavated
galleries, she wondered if the tunnels were still accessible. Nanites
had been scattered to reclaim the building materials and erase all
traces of the gethes. When Ade and
Barencoin had dragged her bound and gagged from the place, the walls
were already crumbling.
"I'm going to see how far I can get," she said. "I'll
call if I need help."
"I will accompany you," said Shapakti. "A cave-in is
less alarming than the anger of your males."
The subterranean colony, once as striking a feat of
excavation as the Nabataeans' Petra, had been robbed of its light and
was now pitch-black. Shan's adapted vision kicked in and she picked her
way through piles of soil and fallen stone. Her boot crunched on
something, and when she looked down it was the remains of an ESF670
rifle, the one she had taken from Chahal and tried to fire into Lindsay
Neville's head. The nanites had dismantled most of it; the buffer pin
and return springs seemed to be the last items on the menu for them.
"They used to have sunlight down here," she said. "Aras
never did tell me how they managed that. Are you okay, Shapakti?"
"I can see well enough to walk."
Wess'har had evolved from burrow dwellers: low light
didn't hamper them, but Shan switched on the flashlight in her swiss
anyway. Shapakti didn't have the infrared vision that c'naatat
had given her.
The map of Constantine was etched in her mind. She
sniffed, tasting decay on the stale air. No, not decay: putre-faction.
She'd smelled that so often in
her life that there was no mistaking it for anything else. It was a
corpse.
The colonists left their dead for the native
rockvelvets. There were no flies here, nor any of the usual terrestrial
insects that lived on the dead. The colony had only been interested in
resurrecting pollinators from the gene bank.
Shan thought that a good old-fashioned bluebottle would
have been just the job right then. "Can you smell it?"
"I smell…sulfur compounds."
The wess'har sense of smell was acute. After a couple
months in a warm environment bodies had usually peaked in stench, but
the microecology here was shot to hell. And rockvelvets only fed in the
open. Decay was slow.
Shan reached in the back of her belt for her gun,
purely out of habit in a dark and now unfamiliar place, and Shapakti
made a little noise of surprise. Maybe he thought she knew something he
didn't. His sudden whiff of alarm managed to cut through the smell of
rotting meat. The tunnels were silent except for their footsteps and
the sporadic sifting noise of falling soil.
"You're not breathing," said Shapakti.
No, she wasn't. It was funny how you could forget to do
some things. She made a conscious effort to start again. She headed for
the abandoned church of St. Francis, reasoning that if she were a
religious colonist in trouble then she'd go there when things got
really bad.
GOVERNMENT WORK IS GOD'S WORK
The inscription--archaic, arrogant, delusional--was still
legible in the block of hard stone that had come from Ouzhari, the
original landing site. Shan just walked in, aware that neither the dead
nor the living could harm her but cautious nonetheless. And this wasn't
a crime scene with evidence to protect and secure.
The efte door was gone and
she walked along the aisle as she had first done two years ago, a Pagan
disturbing someone else's hallowed ground. But there was no magnificent
stained-glass window of the saint who respected all life. The stone
frame was empty, the glass pieces safe on Mar'an'cas. And the carved efte
pews with their dancing angels had been
devoured and recycled by the nanites.
She could now both see and smell her target. It was a
group of bodies, not one, and when she looked down at them with her
hand over her nose and mouth she could see that the group was a man, a
woman and two children.
Even if she had known them there was no way she could
recognize them now. The woman had long brown hair and there were two
hardened slices of bread nearby. One had neat bite marks taken out of
it. The cause of death didn't matter any more. But it didn't look as if
they starved.
"Stupid bastards," she said. "Some of them wouldn't
leave."
Shapakti peered at the bodies, cocking his head in
fascination. Of course: if he was going to learn anything about human
biology, he would learn it from a dead body, not a live one. Wess'har
had no concept of the vivisection of other species.
"Where is the part that still lives?" he asked. "The
invisible component?"
"The soul? Oh, that's just crap. A story."
"Like c'naatat."
"Shapakti, my old mate, they're dead.
Trust me. I've seen a few stiffs in my time." Here
I go, copper's lairy mouth again, shutting myself off from it all by
being flippant. "They're not decomposing normally because there
isn't the range of insects here to do the job the Earth way. If you
want some samples, go ahead."
"The anti-human pathogen worked."
"I'd say. It was based on my original DNA. I always did
have an antisocial streak in me." She watched him squat down and place
a thin rod at various points in the tangle of misshapen, discolored
limbs. The bodies were huddled together, embracing: a family, probably.
"Did I look that bad when they brought me in?"
"I believe that your shape was more coherent."
"Flatterer." She thought of a hundred other corpses
whose last moments she had reconstructed. "There's a part of me that
says put them outside for the rockvelvets, but I'm buggered if I'm
going to move them in that state." Deconsecrated
or not, the church is where they wanted to die. Leave them in peace.
"When you've got what you want, let's go."
A little over two months ago Shan had stood here, her
back to the altar, and addressed the thousand or so colonists. The man,
woman and children lying here had heard her tell them to leave, to
abandon all they'd worked for. She looked at the faces and couldn't see
who had once looked back at her.
Movement caught her eye.
She aimed her gun two-handed and strained to see.
Whatever it was, it was small. She walked into the corner behind the
pile of sawdust that had once been the altar and noticed a pattern of
tiny footprints and a faint smell. She knew that scent. It was almost
like lavender leaves. She put her gun back in her belt and squatted
down, looking for rats.
"Come on out, fellas," she said. She made the clicking
noise she'd heard Aras use with Black and White to get them to come to
him. "Come on. I won't hurt you."
Shapakti edged up behind her. "What is it?"
"Rats. The colony abandoned them. Poor little buggers
must be living on the bodies." She didn't dare risk a bite. An immortal
rat was a prospect she wasn't ready to contemplate, and she didn't have
thick enough gloves to withstand those teeth. Sticking her hand into a
hole was a recipe for disaster. She drummed her fingers on the floor
until a whiskered nose emerged from a crack in the stone.
"What are they?"
"Earth animals. The Thetis
mission brought them for experiments."
"Oh."
"Yeah. Oh. Aras
confiscated them from Rayat and let the kids look after them. He really
likes them." She found herself smiling. There was nothing wrong with a
man who cared about animals, nothing at all, even if he wiped out
cities. She drummed her fingers again and a large beige rat bounded
towards her and sniffed her gloves. She withdrew her hand cautiously.
"They're tame ones."
She fumbled in her pockets. She always kept something
on hand to eat, and this time she found a very old packet of dry
rations. It did the trick. In a minute she had assembled fourteen rats
of varying sizes and colors, all jostling for food.
"I can't just leave them here," she said. "They'll
starve to death. Got a bag or something?"
Shapakti offered her a tube the size of a cigar.
"What's that?"
"A container." He bent it between his fingers and it
unfurled into a large open box with curved sides. "Here."
"I bet you were a Boy Scout."
"You are incomprehensible."
"It's just a compliment."
Shapakti picked up the rats, each steadfastly refusing
to be parted from its fragment of compressed soya and fruit, and placed
them in the box. Shan took off her jacket and laid it across the open
top; she didn't know much about rats, but she knew they preferred the
comfort and safety of the dark.
"You're undernourished," said Shapakti.
"Give me a few weeks, son," she said, anticipating
Aras's delight at the rescue. "Then come and feel my biceps."
They walked a different route through the fields on the
way back to the raft. The tayberry bushes were still there, brown and
twisted, and it was hard to tell if they were dead or just dormant.
Someone should have cut back the old canes to ground level. On a stone
facing the sun, two rich black velvet place-mats patterned with
concentric lighter rings lay sunning themselves. They shivered at
Shan's approach and began sliding off the rock to inch away to safety.
"Rockvelvets," she said. "Human eyes can't see the
rings. Did you know that?"
"I would like to know what else c'naatat
has changed in you."
"I'll tell you all about it one day."
Ceret was setting fast. Skimming south across the sea
towards Ouzhari on a sheet of glass in failing light and then in the
dark was unnerving, but if you'd drifted in space for a couple of
months it was suddenly a long way down the sphincter constriction scale.
Shan was beginning to enjoy sailing. She wondered how
Ade might like it. The niluy-ghur would
have made a great amphibious landing craft if the camouflage could have
been sorted out.
By the time they beached, Shapakti was back in his
beekeeper's suit and the box of rats was wrapped in a protective gel
film. The Eqbas craft was a gleaming bronze beacon swept sporadically
by rippling blue light, looking for all the world like a sleazy
nightclub situated on the edge of town because the neighbors objected
to the noise.
At the entrance, Shan submitted to decontamination in
what she now thought of as a plastic bag and wondered if this was what
it felt like to be trapped by a sheven
just before it began digesting you. It might have been worse than
spacing yourself.
"We've brought some guests," she said.
Esganikan was kneeling on the deck with the crew,
eating from plates as if they were on a picnic. Shan picked up a dark
brown slab and chewed on it, not caring that it tasted like solid yeast
extract.
"I hope you didn't mind my bringing back the rats,"
said Shan. "They couldn't survive here."
"I don't object."
"So? Any news?"
"The marine survey team has located a number of
bezeri," said Esganikan.
"Dead?"
"Alive."
Shan's stomach flipped but she couldn't distinguish
between her own relief and dread. So you found someone alive in a pile
of bodies, and that was good for five seconds; and then it dawned on
you what they would be going through.
"How many?"
"Fifty-four."
"And what shape are they in? Did you manage to use the
signaling lamp?"
Esganikan looked for a moment the way Shan had so often
felt, shoulders sagging in weary disillusion.
"We may have to work without them to repair the
ecosphere. But we will repair it."
It was an oddly evasive answer for a wess'har. But
their logic was utterly unsentimental. The bezeri were the obvious
victims to a human, but they weren't the only species to suffer: others
were woven into the ecology.
Shan tried again. "What did they say,
exactly?"
"They will talk only to Aras Sar Iussan."
In their hour of need, the bezeri had turned to the one
outsider in whom they had any degree of trust. Aras would be reassured
by that, Shan thought.
She also wondered what they wanted to say to him that
they couldn't say to anyone else.
This is our final
request. We demand that you return both the traitor Par Paral Ual and
the Destroyer of Mjat so that they may face proper justice.
MINISTER
PAR NIR BEDOI,
Northern Assembly
The vessel that had separated itself to
visit Bezer'ej appeared over F'nar, dropping beneath the cloud cover
and settling in the Eqbas camp. Aras straightened up and put his hoe
aside for a few moments to watch it. The marines stopped too.
Shan was back. He had pined every moment she was away.
It had only been two days, but he never wanted to let her out of his
sight again, and neither had Ade, but she insisted on going alone.
"She'll be wanting her dinner on the table," said Ade,
and dusted his hands on his pants. "Let's get this finished and head
home."
"I hope Shapakti took care of her."
"You can bet on it," Ade said. "We had a little chat."
Ade's little chats seemed
to have a salutary effect. Aras suspected it was the unsettling effect
of a polite and modest manner backed up by physical strength and the
slightest suggestion that--if pushed--he might kill you. Yes, Ade had
the
makings of a fine house-brother: Aras would welcome his genes. And the
soldier knew what it was to grapple with unpleasant memories and
tolerate exile.
"Aras, how do you feel about the Eqbas?" asked Qureshi.
"They're different," he said carefully. So many of them
were unmated adults. It was unnatural. "But so am I, so I cannot
criticize."
He went to the irrigation node and rinsed his hands and
face under the rushing water. The marines went on hoeing, preparing the
ground within the biobarrier for beans, potatoes and something called
chickpeas. The area devoted to terrestrial crops had expanded
five-fold; there were eight people to feed now who couldn't digest
wess'har food and the supplies were running low. For the first time,
the Constantine colony had no carefully preserved surpluses to give
away. But the marines seemed to be enjoying their rapid instruction in
horticulture and had reduced the soil to a textbook fine tilth with
precise lines of drills. They were happy to be busy. They didn't seem
to care how their time was occupied as long as it was filled with
activity.
Aras reflected that it was a perfect image of the gethes
concept of irony. An alien was teaching
urbanized humans how to grow their own crops.
"Painting coal white," said Ade. He squatted down at
the end of one of Becken's drills and peered along the line in the soil
as if to check for perfection.
Aras considered the concept. "A new phrase for me."
"A pointless activity to keep soldiers busy." Ade took
a handful of red beans and began pressing them into the furrow at
precise intervals with his thumb. "Is this the right depth?"
"I thought you came from a rural part of Earth."
"Me? Nah. City boy."
"You fed baby foxes. Foxes are wild animals, yes?"
"Yeah, but they're all over the cities. Lots of animals
live in urban areas."
Aras felt that he should have realized that. The
information--and plenty of it--had been in Constantine's archives. The
urban coexistence made the gulf of respect between gethes
and other species even more incomprehensible to him.
"Yes," said Aras. "That's the correct depth."
"Join the Marines, see the galaxy, and do a bit of
gardening," said Barencoin, who had started to look satisfied with his
agricultural duties. "Beats getting your arse shot off, anyway."
"You'd fit right in with the colonists," said Webster.
"I don't think Jesus wants me for a sunbeam somehow."
They laughed raucously and while they worked Becken
told a joke about a gethes with a
tapeworm. Aras listened intently. When he had first discovered the
parasitic creature while reading the colony archives, he had briefly
thought of his c'naatat as a benevolent
tapeworm. Becken's story alleged that tapeworms enjoyed certain human
foods.
Becken had one arm raised with an imaginary hammer in
his hand. "So the tapeworm puts his head up and says, �Where's me bar
of nutty, then?' and the doctor goes--wallop."
The marines roared with laughter. Aras, who felt he had
some measure of the gethes' humor, pitied
the tapeworm, who had no choice about the arrangement. His distaste
must have shown; or at least he must have smelled agitated, because Ade
straightened up from the furrow of beans and gave him a discreet jerk
of the head that indicated he wanted Aras to follow him.
"Let's leave this lot to it," he said. "Come on. Can't
keep the missus waiting."
There was a perfectly matched chorus of "Oooo-oooo-ooo!" from the
marines and Aras suspected he knew what that
meant. Ade's face reddened. Aras handed his hoe to Chahal.
They walked away briskly. "I meant your
missus," said Ade.
"I know."
"I can move out."
"Shan made you return last time. Your leaving will not
take away her sense of obligation or attraction."
"And what do you want?"
It was easy for a normal wess'har to say what was on
their mind. But Aras had been tinted by human hesitation. He thought
for a few seconds, filtering the words. "I miss having house-brothers.
I would like us to be a family. But I worry that Shan would feel
obliged to choose between us because humans are monogamous."
Ade walked on a little way ahead. He didn't say
anything else until they passed through the two outcrops of
pearl-coated granite that marked the broken edge of the caldera, as
near to a pair of gates as a carefully unplanned city like F'nar would
ever allow.
"She'd never leave you. She's not like that."
Aras knew that. But it didn't mean that she would want to
stay with him. Shan was a creature of
duty; the thought of her enduring him if she wanted to be with Ade
alone was unbearable. She might grow to resent him in time. He couldn't
face that.
"I lost my first isan and
I very nearly lost Shan. The thought of losing her again terrifies me."
"And you must know what I feel for her. But I've done
enough damage. I don't want to do any more."
"The decision will be hers."
They reached the door and there was a moment of
hesitation as Aras stood back to let Ade enter first and Ade did the
same. There was no natural hierarchy between them yet. Aras stepped
across the threshold, flustered.
"I'll get the kettle on," said Ade. "I make a good cup
of tea, she says."
Aras had been so certain that having Shan back would
make life perfect. But it wasn't working out that way at all. She had a
second chance at life, and a very long one at that. He wanted it to be
happier than what had gone before.
He would do whatever it took to ensure that.
"And then they will do what, exactly?" demanded
Esganikan Gai. She slammed her virin down
on the table so Ual could see the vague ultimatum from his respected
colleague Bedoi. "The isenj will use force if we don't comply? Or is
this just talk?"
Her English was becoming excellent, and very rapidly.
Ual tried hard to stop his beads shivering on his quills: he had been
in F'nar a week now and was becoming agitated. In the Exchange of
Surplus Things he had a permanent audience because, as Eddie told him,
wess'har washed their dirty linen in public.
"There is a great deal of rhetoric in public life that
wess'har are unfamiliar with," said Ual. "Sometimes politicians don't
think before they speak. Their concern is saying what will satisfy the
electorate."
Eddie Michallat, who had been sitting quietly on a
crate a little to Ual's right, uncrossed his legs. "Well, that's
something our species have in common."
"I will tell you what's going to happen," said
Esganikan. A small knot of wess'har was watching her: a few more were
more interested in the image occupying most of one of the walls, an
image of an orderly city of towering fungus-like buildings and much
vegetation. "We have assessed your planet from orbit for restoration
purposes. We have so few species to work from that we will introduce
those from Tasir Var that appear appropriate. The alternative is that
your situation deteriorates until you reach a terminal population
crisis and natural disaster overtakes you. Either way, you will be
confined to your two planets. Containment measures are being put in
place."
We weren't going anywhere anyway.
Ual didn't want war. There was nowhere on Umeh to fight one. "When will
you take me back to Umeh?"
"When we land, you will be with us."
"And when will that be?"
"Would tomorrow be soon enough? I have some business to
attend to with the gethes and I would like
that completed before we visit your people."
Eddie exhaled very slowly and quietly. Ual took it as
suppressed surprise.
"While you're on the blower to Earth," said Eddie, "could you see if
they'll connect me to my News Desk, please?"
Esganikan stood up and it was clear the conversation
was over. She strode out with her ussissi aide scuttling behind her.
Eddie watched her go and then turned to Ual.
"If Shan and that one ever ganged up, I'd leave town,"
said Eddie.
"A formidable creature. I have not yet met Shan
Frankland." Ual felt the need to confide in Eddie. "I have made a great
mistake."
Eddie shook his head. "What's the alternative? The
Eqbas were coming the minute the bombs went off on Bezer'ej. After
that, all you can do is get the best deal for your people that you can.
Damage limitation."
"We should have chosen our allies more carefully."
"I don't think anyone planned this. We never do."
"Will you come with me, Eddie?"
He raised his eyebrows. "I've never filmed a lynching."
"We do not lynch."
"So what's the worst that can happen to you?"
"Imprisonment. Disgrace."
"Am I going to make that much difference? I don't think
having Earth media present is going to deter your people one bit."
"I would feel comforted to have a friend with me."
"Oh."
Ual had not seen his family for some weeks. Long
separations were normal: his offspring were too young to live
independently, and they were being educated on Tasir Var, a world he
had never visited. His mate had gone to look after them. She hadn't yet
replied to his message that told her what he'd done and how afraid he
was. She might have already abandoned him to find another male. He had
no way of knowing.
And now he had grown tired of the pretense with Eddie.
He reached into his belt for the blue bead, with every intention of
telling Eddie that he knew what he had done with the quill, and that it
no longer mattered because he had voluntarily given his own sample: but
he couldn't. Eddie had saved him from a decision that might have been
catastrophic. Plausible deniability. He'd
even taught him the concept.
Ual let his arm fall back. "I will attempt to talk my
way out of it when we land. I believe that's something you're good at,
yes?"
"They do say."
"I might even tell an untruth. Will you help me?"
"Eddie Michallat, the man who introduced lying to the
isenj nation. What an epitaph."
"The truth can be very much overrated."
"You're not wrong there."
Ual got up and made his way towards the entrance. It
was a bright, clear day. Eddie followed him outside and they picked
their way through the alleys and out onto the ill-defined path that led
out through the fields to the wild unspoiled plain.
Wess'har--Targassati
wess'har, anyway--didn't like to leave permanent marks on the landscape
if they could help it. It was one of the most interesting facts he had
learned.
"Where are we going?" asked Eddie.
"For a walk."
Eddie probably understood. He followed at a distance.
It was the most extraordinary sensation to move without
rules on pace and direction, without being required to keep to one side
of the road or the other, to stop and start and turn as you pleased.
The space he had felt…anarchic.
There was nobody he could collide with. There were no
open spaces like this on Umeh. The only areas that had not been
completely built over were the ice deserts, and even now the huge
expense of urbanizing them seemed inevitable if the population was to
be housed.
A shape overhead made Ual start. But it wasn't a
vessel. It was a flying creature of some kind, in fact a whole group of
them moving slowly across the sky with steadily flapping wings. They
had no purpose for the wess'har. They simply existed here with them. He
had never seen wild creatures on Umeh. Nobody had, not in living memory.
Umeh could have this one day. It wouldn't be authentic,
but it would be a new reality. He inhaled the air. Isenj could tolerate
a wider range of atmospheres than humans, but good clean air free of
the by-products of crowded living tasted sweet whatever its composition.
"Why did they build F'nar here? There are pleasant
grasslands and forests right across the planet."
Eddie shrugged. "They chose the barren places where few
native species lived."
"They take that much care?"
"I know. It's hard for humans to understand too. We'd
have hogged the best seats right away." The breeze whipped his hair.
"I've tried to understand why they're like this. On Earth, the species
and individuals that grabbed most survived. Where the wess'har came
from, the species that cooperated best were the ones who made it. I
want to go to Eqbas Vorhi. I have to see it for myself."
Isenj were competitive too. Competition had limits.
Ual opened his mouth and took in as much of the clean
air as he could gulp down. He spent the rest of the afternoon weaving
an irregular path back and forth across the plain of F'nar, stunned by
the space and the endless vista of tiny, fast-growing winter plants and
bright pearl cliff faces.
He was right. He knew now that he was, and that
whatever price he paid would be worth it.
The detail of
Earth geopolitics probably means little to you, but I want to assure
you that the FEU does not speak or act on
behalf of the whole planet. We too are appalled at the events in your
system. We have now forced the FEU to turn back its warship
Hereward and we hope you will take that as a
token of our genuine wish to stay out of your affairs. The United
Nations, an international peacekeeping organization that represents all
Earth states, has imposed a permanent and global ban on travel and
exploration beyond our own solar system. We hope this measure will
convince you that there is no need for you to intervene here to
guarantee your own security.
UN Secretary General MARIE-CLAUDE
GARCES, in a message to Curas Ti
The scent of jask
hit Nevyan before she entered the Exchange of Surplus Things. Esganikan
and Shan were locked in disagreement. She didn't need to see either of
them to know that.
"They are below," said
Serrimissani.
Nevyan hurried down the passage that stretched under
the Exchange to the subterranean hangars where F'nar's fighter craft
were housed. The terrestrial gene bank had been placed there for
safekeeping. She followed the scent that Shan had tagged mango
and found her and Esganikan standing by
the row of dull gray composite cabinets that held as comprehensive a
selection of the Earth's plant and animal species as anyone could
assemble. Many no longer existed on their own planet. And Shan's
posture as she stood in front of the cabinets said clearly that she
would not surrender their contents.
Shapakti, two of his crew, four F'nar citizens on
maintenance duties and Aitassi stood at a sensible distance from the
matriarchs. A definite space had cleared around the two even though
their pheromonally charged debate would have no impact on the hierarchy
of F'nar.
To a human, it might have looked like a discussion.
Shan was leaning against one cabinet, arms folded, and Esganikan was
speaking quietly to her in wess'u, the linguistically neutral territory
they had settled upon. But their scent said very clearly that they were
jostling for dominance.
"I think it's a very risky move," said Shan.
"Nobody can own this resource."
"I don't claim to own it, but its safety is my personal
responsibility."
"It should return to Earth. The species should all be
restored."
"And what if we fuck up
again? The whole gene bank is gone."
"We will ensure that no gethes…"
Esganikan got to grips with the new phrase: her red plume bobbed. "… fucks
up again."
Nevyan stepped across the moat of space around the two
females.
"We're discussing what should happen to the gene bank,"
said Shan, but she didn't take her eyes off Esganikan. "I'm concerned
about committing all of it to Earth."
A powerful defensive scent made Nevyan glance towards
Esganikan for an opinion and Shan simply turned to look at her. Shan
was her friend. And Shan should have been standing where Nevyan was
now: the human had outscented Chayyas when she first came to the city,
and so the senior matriarchy of F'nar was hers by right. She had chosen
to hand that to Mestin. Mestin had ceded to Nevyan.
And Nevyan never thought she might have to test her jask
against Shan Frankland.
She met Shan's eyes and the message was clear: are
you on my side or what? She could almost
hear her saying it. It was the or what
that always had such finality about it.
"I agree with Shan Chail,"
said Nevyan. She did: but even if she didn't, she trusted Shan's
judgment over a stranger's. She smelled her own determination well up
and add to the pheromonal mix. "Before any of this material returns to
Earth there must be a duplicate bank, maintained out of the reach of gethes."
"I'd go along with that," said Shan.
"Can you do this?" asked Nevyan.
Esganikan's scent was diminishing. She took a step back
from Shan, who unfolded her arms. "Yes. It can be done. We need access
to examine the specimens."
"I'll show Shapakti around later," said Shan, and made
no attempt to step away from the cabinet. She smiled, but there was no
movement in the muscles around her eyes. Esganikan and her party stood
blinking for a few moments and then left.
Nevyan waited.
"Thanks," said Shan. "I think we out-mangoed her."
"I have never known two isan've
need to confront another together to achieve consensus." Nevyan had to
ask. "You're quite capable of asserting your dominance over her on your
own, so why did you not do so?"
"I didn't want your job then, and I don't want hers
now. There's a time and a place for throwing your weight around and
this isn't it."
"How do you control your scent?"
"I just can. I suggest we see her together when there's
critical business to be done, or she'll just walk all over you. And me,
if I'm not as hard as I think I am."
It wasn't an insult. It was a statement of fact and a
prudent precaution. "I know I can rely on you to support me, Shan."
Shan stepped away from the cabinet and stood looking at
it, arms folded again and her lips pressed together as if she resented
it for dragging her so far from home. She opened it with a touch on a
recessed panel. Cold air rolled out from the cabinet in a breath of
fog, and inside it layer upon layer of thin shelves held a snapshot of
a planet Nevyan had never seen.
"Will you travel back with the gene bank?" asked Nevyan.
"I can't. This is home now." Shan betrayed neither
regret nor satisfaction. "My mission was to retrieve the unpatented
strains of food crops. Perault never said anything about my returning
with them, and I don't reckon she gave a monkey's toss if I came back
or not. Once the samples ship out, my obligation ceases."
Shan took a small object out of her jacket, not her own
communications device but one like those that had been confiscated from
Rayat and Neville. She tossed it a little way in the air and caught it
again in one hand. "Guess what?"
"I cannot follow this conversation."
"Okay, I've been going through Rayat's handheld to get
names. But I came across correspondence with Eugenie Perault, the
minister who gave me my Suppressed Briefing."
Shan began walking towards the exit and beckoned Nevyan
to follow.
"And?"
"It's routine. It's just the combination of people that
sets my bells ringing. There's no reason for her to talk to a
pharmacologist, so she was talking to him as a spy. Now, ministers
normally have whole departments of minions who do that for them, so if
she was having personal conversations with him, I'm pretty sure they
were along the same lines of the one she had with me, because she
usually didn't talk to lowly EnHaz coppers either."
"He was not a factor in your Suppressed Briefing?"
"No. But I'm bloody sure now that he knew what he was
looking for out here. I just want to know why he was tasked to find c'naatat
and if Perault was the one who sent
him."
"I would think that was obvious."
"Not if you know Perault. She was a devout Christian,
and her sister was an eco-terrorist. One of those I helped when I
really shouldn't have. I didn't know who she was at the time. Call me
naive."
"You sound as if you regret what you did."
"Not at all. I'd do it all over again. I'd just go in
harder next time, that's all." Shan stared at the handheld as she
walked, apparently willing information to extract itself from the
device. "And it doesn't even matter if she sent him with a different
set of orders to me, but I need to know anyway. I hate loose ends. It's
one of those obsessions that makes me a copper."
"Will he tell you?"
"I get the feeling he wants me to try to thrash it out
of him to show he can get the better of me."
"And are you determined to show him he can't?"
"When you put it like that, it does sound puerile."
They came out into the main hall of the Exchange and
some wess'har paused to sniff the air, reacting to the wild cocktail of
scents that still clung to them.
"You let them live because you want to know these
things? Is that all?"
"I let them live because Esganikan told me not to shoot
them. But yes, I want to know." If Shan was annoyed by her criticism
she didn't let it show. There was no trace of any scent or expression.
"I don't like relying on gut instinct, but sometimes it's the best
there is and it's saved me on more than one occasion. And something's
telling me that I can't close this unless I know what Perault was up
to. It might be irrelevant, but I know there's a missing piece and it
just might be significant."
"What now?"
"I'm going to get Lindsay and Rayat moved to
Mar'an'cas."
"Why?"
"They're sitting on their arses in Fersanye's house
doing nothing and eating, and they ought to be earning their keep. They
can get their hands dirty with the colonists." Shan tapped at the
handheld, distracted. "And perhaps being stuck with a bunch of
god-botherers on a cold wet rock for a while will shake Rayat down. Or
get him to drop his guard to someone."
"But Lindsay Neville was never part of his operation,
was she?"
Shan shook her head.
"Do you wish to kill her?"
"Sometimes."
"Perhaps you have learned to dispense with pointless
revenge."
"I doubt it," said Shan.
Ual wondered if the defense forces of the
Northern Assembly might try to shoot down the ship before he had the
chance to make his case. And if they didn't, then the Maritime Fringe
might save them the trouble. It all depended on how keen they were to
call down the wrath of Eqbas Vorhi.
Esganikan Gai, who stood at the helm of a warship that
had somehow detached itself from the larger vessel, seemed unperturbed.
"Your forces have nothing that can penetrate this hull."
"Said an Eqbas spokesman," Eddie muttered, but very
quietly. He held a short sleeveless garment up against his chest. "Is
charcoal my color?"
"What is that?"
"A ballistic vest to stop projectiles putting a hole
through me. I know it works because it's Shan's and she said it stopped
an isenj round before." He fastened the vest down each side and flapped
his arms as if testing it for comfort. "It's too tight. Funny, she
always seemed to be built like an Amazon."
"I have yet to meet her," said Ual. He wondered if he
would ever get the chance now: he could imagine the reception he might
get in Jejeno. "I didn't believe Giyadas when she said she had
survived."
The distance between Wess'ej and Umeh was hours rather
than days, a bus ride as Eddie called it.
Esganikan's liquid fragment of warship began decelerating on its
approach to Umeh space. The interior of the ship was all fluid light
and shifting displays that took up all the bulkhead space, and the
Eqbas personnel were kneeling or sitting in small niches, looking more
as if they were meditating than standing by for possible attack.
Esganikan glanced at an unintelligible formation of
gold lights set in an amber cloud and passed her hand over it. "When we
encounter your defense systems, we will exercise caution."
"I thought you said they didn't have anything big
enough to take you out," said Eddie.
"I meant that we will avoid putting the Umeh armed
forces in a position where we have to retaliate and destroy them."
"Ah. I can see why that wouldn't get things off to a
good start."
It was a wise precaution. The long-range surveillance
net on both Umeh and Tasir Var would react to an alien vessel. They
were very old systems, created before isenj realized that wess'har
would make no attempt to attack them on their own territory--except
Asht, of course. Ual had given up thinking of the planet as Asht. He
accepted that it was now and always would be Bezer'ej. If others could
take that view, the isenj would be on their way to breaking their
dependence on a past that couldn't be recreated, and they might look
forward to a very different but easier future.
The image of Umeh was an ochre disk on the bulkhead.
Ual had now seen his homeworld from space twice, but he compared it
with the swirled blue and white surfaces of Wess'ej and Bezer'ej, and
even Earth. They all looked so much more inviting.
"Your ground command is warning us," said Esganikan. "Is there an
appropriate response?"
"Let me speak to them," said Ual.
It was not a Northern Assembly station but a Maritime
Fringe one that had detected the Eqbas ship. Surface Defense at Buyg
wanted the ship to turn back.
"I am Minister Par Paral Ual and I wish to land with a
delegation from Eqbas Vorhi," he said. Delegation
was an Eddie word, very weasel, and
nowhere near as alarming as warship. "We
require entry to Umeh airspace."
"You're a traitor on board an alien ship."
"The reality is a little more complicated than that.
Are you aware what might happen if Umeh was to carry out an unprovoked
hostile act against an Eqbas vessel? Or if the Maritime Fringe did, and
was the cause of hostilities that affected its neighbors?"
There was a pause. Ralassi, close at Ual's side, was
making little snap-snap-snap noises with
his teeth. "They won't fire on a vessel with ussissi on board. We would
stop crewing vessels for isenj if that happened."
"Power of the union, lads," said Eddie. His voice
vibrated uncharacteristically. "That's the spirit."
The Eqbas helmsman didn't look up. He said something in
eqbas'u that Ual couldn't follow and Esganikan turned her head to give
what seemed to be an order. The bridge crew moved instantly to
different positions.
"Let's not start firing," said Ual. "This can be worked
out peacefully--"
"We are landing," said Esganikan. "We know now what
your target acquisition technology is like and this ship has not been
targeted. Aitassi and Ralassi will talk to your ground stations and
identify a landing site for us."
"If I have any authority to land at all, it will be in
Northern Assembly territory, in Ebj." If I have
any authority… "If anything happens to me, the person you should
concentrate your persuasive skills upon is Minister Par Shomen Eit. His
responsibility is supplies, which is infrastructure and environment."
"I intend to speak to your whole Assembly."
She alarmed him. "I wish you would discuss these ideas
with me a little more in advance of executing them."
Esganikan stared back. "It makes no difference."
Eddie moved slowly forward to stare at the bulkhead
display, arms pressed in to his sides as if afraid the ballistic vest
would abandon him. Then he took his bee cam out of a pocket and let it
hover by his head. He said nothing.
"Is this a dangerous situation for you, Eddie?"
The journalist shrugged. "I've been in worse. And I
wasn't sitting behind an Eqbas cannon at the time." He glanced at
Esganikan. "Do you have cannon, by the way?"
She seemed almost indulgent. She actually patted
Eddie's arm, and he flinched. "If you mean heavy long-range weapons,
yes. If you feel vulnerable, you may stay in the ship when we land."
"You must be joking," said Eddie. "This is my bloody
story. I'm having it."
Esganikan might not have understood his colloquial
language but she appeared to detect something else, and patted his arm
again. Ual realized Eddie was afraid. His face was paler than usual and
he was breathing more rapidly, licking his lips. Ual wondered if he
enjoyed the tension or if he simply lived with it as soldiers did.
Either way, the human was right. There was plenty to
fear.
And Ual was completely alone. All isenj prized a little
solitude, a luxury in a crowded world, but this wasn't quite the
solitude Ual had in mind.
"I'll be right behind you," said Eddie.
Shan woke with a start and realized she was not
drifting somewhere between Bezer'ej and Umeh. She was in her own bed,
alive, well fed, and warm. The relief was wonderful.
"You stop breathing frequently," Aras whispered.
"Sorry. Does it bother you?"
"Not as long as I can still feel your heartbeat."
"Yeah, that's how I look at it." She buried her head in
the hollow of his shoulder and tried to doze again. "You still here?"
Wess'har slept in irregular short bursts: Aras would get up and wander
off several times during the night, something she had grown used to.
"Keeping an eye on me?"
"I thought you might be upset if you woke and I wasn't
here."
"Aww. Sweet."
"It's started."
"What has?"
"Recall of your memories."
"Oh."
She felt him swallow. "Most unpleasant."
"Try fucking awful."
"You're very resilient."
"Didn't have a lot of choice."
She started to drift off again, soothed by the
delicious scent of sandalwood and the suede-like feel of his skin. This
was bliss. She didn't need to be on her guard. She knew her gun was on
the table by the bed and it didn't matter that it was a little out of
reach. F'nar felt safe in a way that Earth never had.
He nudged her. "And am I forgiven for my reluctance to
mount you?"
"Aras, can we work on a bit of euphemism, please? Mounting
just doesn't do it for me."
"But you don't use
euphemism. You say--"
"I know what word I use. But mounting is a bit too… agricultural."
"Very well. But am I? Forgiven, that is?"
"I reckon."
"Promise me that you won't get involved in Esganikan's
missions. I would welcome some uneventful time with you."
It wasn't an unreasonable request. "Provided she
doesn't piss me about over the gene bank, I'll leave her to her own
devices. I'm not the cavalry any more. I know when I'm done."
Aras made a noncommittal rumble in his throat that
might have been either approval or disbelief. She shut her eyes again
and rearranged his arm into a more comfortable position for her head;
the rumble turned into that purr with its undertone of infrasonics,
ebbing and flowing, soothing her just as it would calm a wess'har
infant. The outside world receded. She sank into a blanket of endless,
blurred gold.
"What if it had been Rayat?" The purr trailed off.
Oh, please. The gold haze
evaporated. "What if what had been Rayat?"
"If you had infected him. Would you have felt the same
pity and…obligation?"
"Oh, come on." She rolled
over on her back. She was wide awake again. "No. Not even with a bag
over his head. I'd have given him a grenade and told him to do the
decent thing." She got up and checked her swiss: it was still four
hours to sunrise and 2318 Western FEU time, as if that mattered to her
body clock any longer. "I know what this is about. You want a
house-brother, don't you?"
"Yes."
Poor sod. He'd coped with
his condition on Bezer'ej, but being surrounded by ordinary wess'har
again seemed to have made him more desperate for normality. She
wondered how long it would be before he became broody. But a remedy for
that longing would always be completely out of the question in so many
ways, and she wasn't even going to mention it.
"Look, if you and Ade want to sort out some
arrangement, go ahead." Yes, go on. Save me
having to make the decision for once. "If that's the way you
both want it, I'll be perfectly happy."
"That's very wess'har of you."
"There's a lot of me that is."
Liar. That was one part
of her that wasn't. Her brain said one at a time,
girl. She was appalled at herself for even looking at Ade, and
she did, oh yes she did. She'd looked at him that way for a long time.
It might have been normal and even commendable for wess'har, but a
voice inside kept yelling slut, slut, slut.
Of course polyandry was okay for wess'har: they were…animals.
And that was another thought she didn't like, and it
was equally unbidden. If there was anyone who should have had the most
open of minds about nonhuman species, it was her, and here she was
relegating wess'har into the category of not like
us.
She really didn't have an us
any longer. The us consisted of Aras Sar
Iussan and Ade Bennett and her. She now had more in common with the
yodeling sea horses in the city below and even with the microscopic
organisms she had sifted between her fingers on Ouzhari than she had
with the monkeys whose worst attitudes still rose up in her when she
least expected it.
"When are you going to see the bezeri?" Aras had taken
the news of their request in silence. She wondered if he didn't want to
leave her on her own with Ade after all. "I could come with you."
"No need," said Aras. "I shall talk to them. I'll leave
tomorrow."
He didn't sound happy about it. But that wasn't
surprising. There was no comfort he could give them, and apologies were
worse than useless.
Outcomes were all that mattered, and Shan couldn't
think of any happy endings for the bezeri.
We approve of
your decision to limit human endeavor to your own system. But your poor
relations with other species on Earth make us believe that the common
interest still needs our intervention. You appear to be familiar with
the concept of third party arbitration and peacekeeping. Our current
timetable and intentions stand.
CURAS TI
senior matriarch of Surang and speaker for Eqbas Vorhi in
off-world matters,
in a message to the United Nations
Ade crouched down to look Serrimissani in
her hostile black eyes and handed her the sheet of smartpaper. "This is
the best I can do, mate," he said. "Rigger's would be best, high
combats if not. I'll be really grateful."
Serrimissani studied the traced outline of the sole of
a boot and gave Ade the sort of look that he'd seen her give Eddie. He
felt stupid. But he'd promised Shan he'd get her some replacement
boots, good solid ones, and he was going to do it. Barencoin and
Qureshi watched him suspiciously. The Exchange of Surplus Things had
become the nearest thing they had to a mess and when they weren't on
crop duties they hung around here, and he wished they wouldn't.
"I will do my best," said Serrimissani. Ussissi seemed
not to find it demeaning to run errands. "If I have to barter for this,
what do I offer?"
Ussissi were new to haggling. Ade couldn't help
thinking they would end up being bloody good at it. They always had
their walk-away point and you couldn't manipulate them. He fumbled in
all the pockets on his shirt and in his pants, and then in his belt
pouch, but there wasn't much. The sum total of his negotiable wealth
was his fighting knife, his mother's wedding ring, and his medals. That
wouldn't be worth much to anyone in Umeh Station. A few kilos of prime
steak would have done the deal a lot better.
No, not the ring. He
turned the medals in his palm. Barencoin grunted and stepped between
him and Serrimissani. "Aw, for fuck's sake, Sarge, not your medals."
"They're not worth anything out here."
"She doesn't need the boots that badly. She's got
boots. Jesus, all this on the off chance
she'll give you a leg-over? You sad bastard."
"Piss off, Mart."
Qureshi pitched in, always the sensible older sister
breaking up a fight between the boys. "Come on, they're his and he can
do what he likes with them. Lay off him."
"I can't for the life of me think what you see in that
bird, I really can't." Barencoin did one of his theatrical eye-rolls of
exasperation. "I mean, I know you're not going to get it anywhere else,
but you're not much use to her now she's had a bit of wess'har, are
you? Not with one dick."
Ade tried very hard not to be his father, always
solving his problems with his fists. He was still the bloody sergeant
here whether they'd dismissed him or not. He lowered his voice. "I said
I'd get her the boots, so I will. And you can wind your neck
in, okay?"
"Suit yourself," said Barencoin, and walked off.
Serrimissani studied the medals and handed them back.
When her paw brushed Ade's hand it felt like corduroy, all soft little
ridges, but she couldn't have been less like a toy if she'd tried. Her
teeth looked like serious business.
"I will find a way to acquire the boots without
barter," she said. "And Marine Barencoin is wrong. From what I have
seen of Shan Frankland, she will take pity on you and grant you sexual
favors whether you offer her boots or not. She has a strong sense of jask."
There were some things a bloke didn't need to hear, and
pity was one of them. Qureshi steered him
into a quiet corner and sat down on an empty crate.
"You okay?"
"Yeah."
"You sure you know what you're doing? We don't want to
see you get hurt. Emotionally, I mean, because it's not like getting a
good hiding from Aras is going to make much difference to you."
"I'm not doing anything. I'm just looking out for her."
"Right."
"She reminds me of my mum."
"Christ, Ade, you never actually told her that, did
you?"
"Yes."
"You should never tell a woman she reminds you of your
mum. Not even if your mum was Helen of Troy."
"I meant that she's not afraid of anything and she
makes me feel safe."
"Well, if you didn't make that clear to her, the boots
aren't going to get you very far."
"I'm not getting her boots for that."
He really shouldn't have mentioned his mother. He could see that now.
"So what would work, then?"
Qureshi's expression was that of someone trying to
break bad news. "You could always just ask her."
"Izzy, you're not going to take the piss out of me, are
you?"
"No, Sarge. She's not that
much older than you. And she doesn't look it."
"Thanks a lot."
"I've said the wrong thing, haven't I?"
"Think what you like." He occupied himself with his
belt, sheathing his fighting knife with exaggerated care. "I can trust
her."
Qureshi didn't ask him to explain. They all knew he'd
had unrelenting bad luck in his love life. They thought he was bloody
soft with women, a pushover, a mug. Maybe he was, but he didn't know
how to be anything else.
"What's the Boss planning to do with Neville and
Rayat?" said Qureshi.
So she thought of Shan as the top of the command chain,
too. We all need structure. "She still
wants information out of Rayat, but I haven't a clue what she wants to
do with Neville."
"I thought she would have jobbed her by now." Qureshi
mimicked Shan's two-handed gun grip. "And that tosser Rayat."
"You know they've found some bezeri survivors, don't
you?"
"Yeah. Not much comfort for them, I shouldn't think."
"I'd ask them what they wanted done with the bastards."
"What if they want all of us
strung up?"
Ade hadn't thought of that. He'd started to accept
Shan's view--and the prevailing wess'har opinion--that the marines
weren't responsible for the destruction of Ouzhari.
But it didn't feel true.
"I could have told Lindsay Neville to fuck off," said
Ade. "What's the worst she could have done? What's the worst Rayat
could have done? Had us court-martialed."
"We could all have
refused, Ade. You might be the sergeant, but we were all capable of
saying no and we just obeyed orders."
"And we should have known better."
"You've seen more action than the rest of us. How many
times have you thought, oh, sod this for a game of soldiers, I'm not
doing that? We all think it and we don't act on it. That's why we're in
uniform and civvies aren't, because if you argue the toss every time
you can't fight."
"Yeah, and wess'har don't give a shit what your motives
are, just what the end result is." He could see Barencoin making his
way back down the Exchange, shuffling a pack of cards as he walked. He
really didn't fancy a game now. He was troubled: he needed to talk to
someone who'd done something unthinkable and had learned to live with
it. "I've got to see Aras about something. I'll catch up with you
later."
Barencoin slapped the cards against his palm to align
the pack and held it out to Ade. "Gin rummy?"
"Nah, got things to do."
"Okay, I was well out of order there. Sorry. Now can we
play?"
"I meant it. There's something I've got to sort out."
Barencoin didn't look as if he believed him. Ade didn't
think Mart would spend a second worrying about what he'd done; or maybe
he was like Shan, just good at looking as if he didn't. When he got
back to the house--and he wondered why he thought of it as a house and
not a cave--there was no sign of Shan. Aras was sitting on the terrace,
Shan's swiss balanced on one thigh and Rayat's handheld on the other,
the devices linked by a wire. A few shafts of pink late afternoon light
pierced the cloud and gave one pearl face of the city a rosy luster.
"Isan has gone to see
Nevyan," said Aras, not looking up. "I have been examining Rayat's
handheld."
"Anything?"
"Nothing further. In the end, not having a named
individual will not prevent Eqbas Vorhi intervening. It's simply a
matter of detail."
"Can I talk to you?"
"If this is about Shan, we have discussed that enough."
"Actually, it's about Mjat."
Aras put the two devices down on the flagstones and
beckoned Ade to him. "Are you having unpleasant flashbacks?"
"No. Well, yes, but it's not about that."
"What do you want to know, then?"
"How I came to roll over and just ship those bombs to
Bezer'ej because I was ordered to. I never thought I was a bad bloke
and now I just don't know any more."
"Have you followed orders before?"
"You know I have. I'm a marine."
"And how did you feel then?"
"I went where they sent me, and my targets were always
ones who'd shoot me if I didn't shoot them." You had to be able to stop
thinking about it after you'd fired. Most blokes couldn't in the end.
Ade found women were much better at killing and moving on. "But c'naatat
wasn't doing me any harm and neither
were the bezeri."
"Humans follow orders, especially if conditioned to do
so."
"I know. I know all that.
But when you bombed Mjat, the isenj weren't a threat to you personally.
So how do you handle it?"
For all Aras's human characteristics, he still had his
unshakeable wess'har clarity when it came to cause and effect. "They
were a threat to the bezeri. They wouldn't stop polluting the planet."
"But how do you feel about it now?"
"I regret that I had to do it and I would do it again."
"So how should I feel about Ouzhari?"
"You know how you feel about it. You feel guilty. The
question is whether you are guilty." Aras
reached out and took hold of Ade's wrist, a loose grip, apparently
unthinking. Ade braced his muscles involuntarily and had to remind
himself that wess'har were touchers and huggers: there was nothing
weird about it. But he still wasn't comfortable with another bloke
touching his hand. "For wess'har to consider you guilty of causing
bezeri deaths, you would have had to arm the devices. And you did not."
"I helped get the ordnance there. Lindsay Neville would
never have managed it without us."
"And if you had a human lawyer, he would argue that you
thought you were transporting neutron devices to an island without
animal life, and that you had every expectation that the explosion
would create minimal environmental effects beyond a few days."
"What's the word for that? Sophistry."
"And if you had known they were cobalt devices, and
Commander Neville had not set them to detonate, would you be guilty
even though no deaths resulted?"
"Yeah. I would. It'd be like conspiracy to murder."
"Our two species have different views of reality."
It didn't help him at all. It muddied the waters.
Perhaps that was an answer. Both sets of logic made sense in themselves
but not side by side, and in the end it was the gut feeling that events
produced that made guilt or innocence.
But Ade had a better idea of what he was feeling now.
He was a kid at home again, not standing up to his violent father, not
doing what he should have done. Aras let go of his wrist.
"You don't always follow orders," he said. "Shan said
you held a gun on Commander Neville to stop her using the grenades."
"Yeah, and you know what happened next."
"Move on."
"I'm trying. It's funny how good and evil get harder to
spot as you get older. I wish I had Shan's sense of black and white."
"It was part of her job to have one. And good and evil
are concepts best left to the colonists. I prefer to think in terms of
what I will personally tolerate and what I will not."
"How do you think the colonists fit that in with a god
who's supposed to have a plan?"
"Does your god receive in packets?"
"Sorry?"
"Prayer. Perhaps God receives data in packets, like
your communication systems once did. Or maybe prayers are heard only by
the praying, which is perhaps more useful." Aras seemed distracted by
the ideas. "If God is omniscient, why does he need prayer to make him
aware of the things troubling people? And if he is
aware, why are humans so presumptuous as to ask him to change events
for them? Has he no firm plan for the universe? I asked Ben all these
things, and Josh too, but they said I needed faith."
For a being with absolutely no concept of the divine,
this was a twenty-four-carat piece of theology. Ade savored the moment
of strangeness brought on by watching a pink pearl sunset with an alien
brother in a caldera 150 trillion miles from home.
But there were no packets of prayers, and no god, and
nobody was waiting for him at the Pearly Gates with a tally sheet of
his sins. He wasn't going to die, and the only pearly gates were right
here, and real.
Whatever peace he reached with himself would take some
work.
"Fuck faith," said Ade. "It's as bad as following
orders."
Boom.
The Eqbas vessel shivered slightly, causing several
bridge crew to bob their heads. Ual found himself looking at an aerial
view of Jejeno that spanned most of the bulkhead in front of him. A
trail of vapor plumed up from the city and seemed to arc straight into
his face, confirmation that something had been fired at the warship.
Esganikan tilted her head side to side but she seemed
perfectly calm. Aitassi and Ralassi were not. They were seething, teeth
bared, and Ralassi had taken over the communications position in front
of the bulkhead. Ual found it hard to see how it was operated. There
were no controls that he could identify, just an illuminated panel the
size of a plate that moved when Ralassi did.
"You fired upon ussissi," he said. "This has never
happened before and it will not be tolerated. We will no longer fly
your vessels. You will cease firing now."
There was absolute silence from the Jejeno ground
station. Ralassi was right: nobody had ever fired on a vessel knowing
ussissi were on board. The isenj were reliant on them as nonmilitary
pilots and interpreters between isenj regions. But then no alien vessel
had ever breached Umeh's airspace uninvited. The old protocols and
assumptions had crumbled in a matter of minutes.
Jejeno looked as it always had. Its intricate towers
and forests of bronze and brown buildings glittered in the afternoon
light, and another vapor trail rose from the ground. This time there
was no gentle shiver as the missile was deflected by the Eqbas vessel.
It never reached them.
"God, it looks just like tracer fire," said Eddie,
wandering up and down the bridge behind his bee cam. Ual watched and
felt his courage begin to abandon him.
Then Eqbas Vorhi ran out of patience.
Bursts of yellow light stabbed a neat and precise path
down to the vapor trail and the bulkhead dimmed the light from the
explosion. Then a bright green beam picked out a target in the city
below and a streak of reflected light flashed down it. Fire spread out
from the point of impact and black smoke roiled up above the tops of
the buildings.
Esganikan considered the image on the bulkhead. The
view changed to a closer shot and Ual could see a crater fringed by
twisted frames and shattered blocks of buildings.
"The point from which you launch your air defenses has
been destroyed," she said calmly, as if she had done this many times
before. "I see no point in causing more destruction than is necessary
and we will not fire again unless there is another attack. Talk to your
colleagues and explain that I would like to speak to the Northern
Assembly today." She turned and took a few
slow paces down the length of the bridge, her plume of red fur bobbing
as she walked, and reached out to touch the bulkhead image of the only
open space in Jejeno--its port landing fields. "I will wait. Now, helm,
take us down."
"Shit," said Eddie.
Ual wondered if Esganikan had any comprehension of what
followed when an explosion occurred in a densely populated city. If she
did, then she showed no sign of anxiety about it. But he knew. He could
imagine what was happening now and he was terrified.
Beneath them, water conduits would be flooding the
streets. Homes, food production centers and offices ran right up to the
walls of the defense station building, and they would have collapsed.
Fires would be spreading. There would be no water to extinguish them
because the pressure in the water supply would have plummeted. And
there would be panic and crushing, fleeing crowds and many, many
civilian deaths.
Eddie seemed to see his thoughts. "We'd call that fish in a
barrel," he said. "Nowhere to run."
"That describes the situation for us all," said Ual.
They were attempting to bury Jonathan Burgh
when Lindsay and Rayat arrived on Mar'an'cas.
Lindsay's trousers were soaked up to the knee.
Barencoin and Becken had been in a hurry to deliver their prisoners to
the colonists and she'd stepped from the boat into deeper water than
she anticipated.
Rayat watched the burial party of colonists trying to
dig in the thin soil. "No carrion-eating life on the island, I take it?"
Barencoin shrugged, chivvying him along like a
sheepdog. "We're all carrion-eaters to the wess'har."
"Shall we give them a hand?" Lindsay asked. "I think
they're going to have to pile rocks."
"You do what you like," said Barencoin. "We're persona
non shit-pot with the colony."
He turned back down the path, Becken close behind him.
James Garrod came down from the camp and grunted for Lindsay and Rayat
to follow him.
"We haven't got much here," said James. Lindsay walked
through the camp of oddly decorative tents, wary of a hostile response.
People seemed subdued but purposeful. "And even if we're going home to
Earth, we've still got a few years to wait out. So you pull your weight
for the time you're here."
Rayat had somehow managed to grab a small bag of
personal effects before he was dragged out of Umeh Station. He hitched
it higher on his shoulder and Lindsay wondered if she could talk him
into letting her borrow a fresh shirt. "No problem," he said to James.
He seemed in his personablemode, probably grooming the colonists for
some act of sympathy that would benefit him. "We'll do whatever you
need."
James showed them to a tent. It seemed they'd have to
share. Lindsay's distaste must have shown on her face.
"We don't do private suites," he said. "Will you be
coming to services?"
It took her a few moments to work out that he meant worship.
"I'm not sure I believe in God," she
said. Rayat was carefully silent.
"Well, he's there, and you might as well start getting
to know him before you go to him," said James. The kid said it with
such casual certainty that her stomach tightened involuntarily. "You'll
have a lot to talk to him about."
James walked away. Rayat tried the thin mattress on the
floor and sat down cross-legged, hands folded in his lap. Lindsay
wished for a change of clothing and an end to the new doubt that was
starting to overtake her.
"Since I left Earth, I've taken more beatings than I
did even in training," said Rayat. "My job's not usually this violent."
Is death really going to be the
end of it? Am I ever going to have peaceful oblivion? "I noticed
you don't fight back. Ever."
"No point fighting unless you're trying to escape or
survive," he said. "Save it for when you really need it."
"And you don't really need it now?"
"I've never been this close to death before."
"Really?"
"Really."
She wasn't sure if she believed him. He appeared
completely drained of motivation and color. So even a spook had his
limits: it seemed that exhaustion and inevitability had finally ground
him down as well.
"You're resigned to what's coming, then?"
Rayat made a distracted click with his teeth. "I know
what you think of me, but I find it as hard as you do to come to terms
with what we did."
"There's no we in this,
you bastard. You loaded the cobalt primers in the ERDs, not me."
For once Rayat didn't argue. "I know."
"And all for nothing. Ade Bennett's infected and Shan's
walking around large as life."
"Bennett?"
"I never told you in case you got stupid ideas again."
"Bennett?" The odd amalgam
of revelation and dismay on his face was priceless. "Shit. Shit."
"So we destroyed a sentient species for nothing."
"You think I feel good about that?" She could have
sworn he was genuinely anguished. "Okay, I've done things in my career
that most people would find nauseating. But my priority is the welfare
of my country, and I'm prepared to do
whatever it takes to ensure that."
"Well, at least you admit it."
"Oh, I'll do more than admit
it. I'd do it again."
"Why does that not surprise me?"
"Look, girlie, we don't live in a cost-free universe.
We get our hands dirty just by living day to day." Girlie.
That was Shan's dismissive term for her, too. Rayat had come as close
to sincerity as Lindsay had ever seen, and it was disturbing: he was
suddenly angry. "So, what if some states
on Earth got hold of c'naatat, and we
didn't? You think that's not worth paying
a high price to avoid? If not for Europe, then for Earth? You
must have thought it was, at least enough to
use nukes."
"Some prices are just too high."
"And how many nice people get killed because they
happen to be in the bad guy's army? There are always
prices to pay and there's always an innocent bystander, but you can't
let that stop you. You know something? I'd kill Frankland without a
second thought, but at least she understands the stakes and she's got
the balls to live with what she does. I'm not even sure we're after
different things, either."
"For all her faults, she wouldn't have risked a
species."
"Unless they're humans."
Lindsay hated him, and his logic, and his contempt, all
of which reminded her more of Shan than she could tolerate. Both had
the same total, ruthless focus. They did dirty jobs: they risked their
lives anonymously for their obsessive principles. And yet she couldn't
see them as the same species as herself.
She shifted tack, worrying what her own motives truly
were. "You going to go to have a talk with God, then? See what deal you
can sort out with him?"
"I'm not a Christian."
"Neither am I. Well, not practicing."
"How do you cope?"
"I don't. I wish there was something I could do to make
amends but it's a tall order, putting genocide right again."
Rayat tipped the contents of his bag out on the bed.
His worldly goods consisted of two gray shirts, some unidentifiable
balled-up fabric and a wallet. He sighed quietly. "What would we all
give to turn back time, eh?"
"Pretty well everything," said Lindsay. "Everything."
Withdraw your
vessel from our planet or face the consequences.
Priority message from Minister PAR NIR
BEDOI Northern Assembly, to Nevyan Tan Mestin
It was cold and the bezeri who nestled in
the rocks off the coastline of St. Chad's island didn't know Aras at
all.
They knew what he was, though.
He held the lamp and signaled to them, speaking wess'u
for the lamp to shape into a language of color. You
asked for me.
The rocks sparkled with concentric circles of pulsing
yellow light that radiated from four or five central points. The bezeri
slowly peeled away from the hiding place, hanging in the water a little
way from him with their tentacles trailing in the current. Aras put his
other hand out to steady himself.
One of them spoke. The lights on her mantle--the same
lights that lived in Shan's hands--flared into complex patterns of red,
green and blue that the lamp converted to sound.
So it's true. You are the
creature that can live both here and in the Dry Above with equal ease,
the one that never dies. One of those who saved us from the polluters.
I am, saidAras. But
I made mistakes and your people died.
Who did this to us?
He would tell them the exact truth. The generic gethes
would mean nothing to them. Like
wess'har, they were specific. Humans who came
here. We have already killed two as an act of balance.
Are there others who are guilty?
Yes. What justice do you require
for this?
We want them balanced too. And
we will do this ourselves. We want all of those who brought this
destruction upon us.
Bezeri didn't have that clear wess'har definition of
responsibility any more than humans did. Aras knew they would include
Qureshi and Barencoin and Chahal in that category--and Ade.
This was one occasion when the truth would serve no
purpose. For the first time in his life, Aras lied like a gethes.
He didn't lie by omission, as he had
done with difficulty before. He lied,
completely and totally.
There are only two of them. A
female called Lindsay Neville and a male called Mohan Rayat.
Bring them to us.
I will.
There is one more thing.
The bezeri took on her colors of quiet consideration, light blue
rhythmic pulses. It was a while before she spoke. There
are too few of us. We need to rebuild, to recover what is left of our
culture and our history. We said we did not want the help of aliens,
but times are hard.
Bezeri had a powerful sense of place. Being rooted in
the coastal waters of these islands made them vulnerable, as did their
fragile biochemistry. They cared about their clans and their
territories and they kept detailed records. Faced with destruction,
they needed to find comfort in their past exactly as humans did. It was
ironic.
I will get you that help,
said Aras, thinking of the Eqbas scientists.
We mean you. We want you to
return to us. You can live among us.
Aras wondered if he had misunderstood. Among
you?
The lights rippled, both fascinating and desperate. You cannot
drown. You can survive anywhere.
Aras's wess'har candor almost betrayed him, but he bit
back a refusal. His mind was filled with selfish preoccupations: he had
an isan and a brother now. There was a
time when he might have conquered his dislike of immersion and sought
escape with the bezeri, but that time was long gone, and he was ashamed
that his first instinct was to abandon them again.
That will be difficult,
said Aras.
You said you would be there for
us. You promised.
And so he had. Give me time to
think.
A male bezeri at the back of the group came forward and
reached into his mantle with one tentacle. He drew out a small flat
oval and extended it towards Aras.
It was the ancient azin
shell map that Aras had once owned. The shell was as transparent as
glass and the bezeri had once made these beautiful complex maps by
compressing colored patterns of sand between the layers of shell. Aras
had given it to Shan, and she had returned it to the bezeri with one
addition: a thin line of red sand, sprinkled carefully like a border,
her way of telling them that she planned to protect them from
outsiders. She called it her exclusion zone.
But it hadn't quite worked out. He took the map from
the outstretched tentacle.
Why are you returning this?
Aras asked.
Give it to the female who gave
it back to us. Tell her that her red line did not hold.
But she tried very hard.
It was not enough.
Aras grasped the tether that reached down from the niluyghur
and twisted it, the map tucked tightly
to his chest. The line drew him slowly up through the water and he
watched the lights dwindle beneath him. One of the Eqbas crew caught
him by his tunic and hauled him inboard, watching fascinated as he
coughed up the seawater from his lungs and shook himself dry.
He cradled the azin map in
both hands all the way back to the ship, remembering all the times he
had sat alone in his own vessel on Constantine and studied its contour
lines.
Tell her that her red line did
not hold.
Shan knew that already. And she hadn't failed them: he had,
right from the time he had allowed the
Constantine mission to survive.
Now the bezeri were asking for his help again. Aras
thought of the concepts of sin and forgiveness and mercy
that Ben Garrod had taught him about nearly two hundred years ago, and
he remembered another one: atonement.
The Pajat coast, Wessej.
"I need some normal human DNA," said Shapakti.
"Don't look at me," said Shan. "Have you tried Eddie?
Journalists share ninety-nine percent of DNA with humans."
"That is humor."
"You're catching on." The glass raft neared Mar'an'cas,
skimming over a relatively calm sea. Clouds threatened to empty
themselves any minute, and Shan wasn't sure if the raft was watertight
from the top. Ade sat cross-legged aft of them, if the raft's layout
could be described in nautical terms. "I expect you can get plenty from
the colonists. You're almost in their good books for helping them
fulfill their religious duty."
"Are they normal humans?"
"Apart from the fact they're as mad as a box of frogs,"
Ade muttered. "That's normal too."
Shan walked around the transparent deck, never having
learned the sailor's discipline of not compromising the trim of the
craft. Ade, frowning slightly, looked as if he disapproved.
"They're normal in the sense that most humans who could
afford health care were genetically manipulated in some way, and that
was the stock they came from," she said. "But I come from a Pagan
family. They wouldn't have any truck with genetic interference, so my
DNA was pretty well wild Homo sapiens."
"And this is what F'nar used to engineer the antihuman
pathogen."
"Yes. They had a sample of my hair from the time before
I caught c'naatat."
"As wide a range of specimens as possible would suit my
purposes."
Shapakti had no hidden agendas; wess'har never did, as
literal and unthinkingly frank as small children.
"And what are your
purposes, then?"
"I would like to see if it is possible to stop humans
becoming host to c'naatat."
That sounded sensible enough. But Shan's old ingrained
misgivings about biological research began to nag at her. It was a
little late for that, given that her DNA was currently doing a decent
razor-wire job in quarantining Bezer'ej. It had certainly worked bloody
well on the family in the church. She was aware of Ade staring at her.
"I don't like experiments," she said.
Shapakti appeared to understand her a lot better than
she thought he did. "I only need to record a profile of cells. Then I
can use models to explore the possibilities."
"And you developed that expertise on yourselves, eh?"
"Yes."
"Just checking."
"I can see why you doubt us. Life on your planet
developed through competition. Ours developed largely through
cooperation, symbiosis and sustainable equilibrium. Would you like to
visit Eqbas Vorhi?"
She wondered what the payload from Thetis
would have made of that. "Yes, I would. One day."
The raft beached and they stepped ashore. Ade kept
glancing back at the vessel as if he didn't quite believe it. As they
walked into Constantine camp with its bizarre jacquard tents and
pervading smell of human waste, the marine slipped his rifle off its
webbing and cradled it across his chest, looking worryingly prepared.
Shan thought she'd be jumpy if she'd been stoned. She had faced a hail
of missiles far too many times in her police career to take a
restrained and sympathetic view of public disorder, and reached down
her spine to the back of her belt to feel the comforting smooth grip of
her 9mm. Shapakti stared.
"Yeah, you bet I'd use
it," she said, anticipating his question and silencing it.
The colonists were about their business, mainly digging
and shifting soil around in small barrows. They glanced up at Shan's
party and then went back to their tasks. They were making deeper soil
beds for crops, gathering up the thin top-soil of Mar'an'cas.
"It's a lot calmer," said Ade, but he still cradled his
rifle and checked around him as he walked. "They can focus on going
home now."
"Sooner the better," said Shan. "I'm going to find
Rayat. Shapakti, you stick with me and we'll get you some samples."
"I'll stick around too," said Ade.
"Look, you know you wouldn't shoot an unarmed
civilian." She couldn't be angry with him for being stiflingly
protective. Nobody had ever given a shit about her safety before, not
even when she was vulnerable to injury. It felt good. "But I
can, believe me."
But Ade still trailed behind her, just the way she'd
seen little wess'har boys trailing after an isanket,
happy to submit to matriarchy.
Rayat was working when she found him. He'd never struck
her as a man who liked getting his hands dirty, but then he'd never
seemed to be a spy either; and she didn't usually get it that wrong. He
was in one of the transparent composite crop tunnels, shoveling the
contents of an old latrine over freshly dug soil. Ade stood at the
entrance like a sentry and Shapakti followed her inside. The enclosed
space concentrated the aroma wonderfully.
"You got five minutes?" said Shan.
Rayat looked up, still scattering the dark, crumbling
mass. "I was expecting you to make some humorous comment about shit and
my presence."
"I don't have a sense of humor. Fancy helping out a
fellow scientist?"
"How?"
"Skin sample. Won't hurt a bit." She beckoned over her
shoulder. "This is my chum Da Shapakti. Hold your arm out for him."
"What's in it for me?"
"Unbroken legs."
Shapakti put on his forensic glove and held up his
forefinger like a proctologist; Rayat rolled back his sleeve. Maybe he
didn't want to lose face in front of her.
"I'm glad your little EVA experience didn't affect your
charm." Shapakti touched his arm and withdrew. Rayat looked slightly
surprised. "Is that all you came for?"
"Here's your handheld."
"Found what you were looking for?"
"No." She was up against a pro in the interrogation
game here. Rayat was even sharper than Eddie so she prepared a feint.
"But in the absence of a named individual who gave you orders to cobalt
Ouzhari, the Eqbas will probably fry the whole FEU when they get there."
It wasn't like that at all, but she lied anyway.
"I can see why you identify with them so strongly."
"Don't try playing the conscience card. It just pisses
me off."
"And don't try to shock a name out of me. I don't much
care what happens to politicians, especially ones who haven't even been
elected yet."
Shan caught sight of her reflection on the
taut-stretched surface of the composite, slightly distorted but all too
detailed: not quite herself yet, too thin, too weak. She braced her
shoulders. It was time to lob a pebble into the information pond, a
trick she'd seen Eddie play too. She knew Perault. She could guess that
if someone knew about c'naatat enough to
brief Rayat, then Perault might know about it, and Perault's religious
views would give her a very interesting take on microscopic eternal
life. Shan had seen how the colonists behaved when confronted with it.
"I wondered if Perault thought c'naatat
was her Christian afterlife." She gambled in her best throwaway tone,
keeping her eyes fixed on Rayat's handheld. His scent said he was
anxious. "Perhaps the idea of seeing God in a culture dish didn't quite
do it for her, though."
She flickered her gaze as if she was trying not
to look at the handheld. Rayat said nothing.
"Come on. Anyone you name is going to be long gone by
the time the Eqbas get to Earth. Esganikan really wants to know."
I'm just thinking aloud.
"Nice try," said Rayat.
Ouch. "Can't blame a girl
for trying."
"Like you said, it won't make any difference who
authorized what." He smiled to himself, but it wasn't aimed at her.
Either way, it was the sort of smile she liked to knock off people's
faces the hard way. "You know Perault. She was obsessed with c'naatat.
But she also understood that it was
dangerous."
No, I had no idea she even knew
it existed. She conned me. Fucking bitch. Shan felt abandoned,
used, violated. "Did she really want it destroyed, though?" Steady.
Don't blow this. His scent's getting stronger.
"I reckon she lost her nerve."
"Yes, the gene bank ploy was clever, especially given
the time she had to set it up. I really thought that was the genuine
mission for a while and that mine was the
bluff."
Your priority is Constantine and
its planet, nothing else. Perault, pious and intense, gave her
the briefing anew.
Doubt wasn't just nibbling away at Shan. It had started
gulping down whole chunks. This was the point at which she threw in her
real fears, suddenly grateful for her wess'har capacity to stand very
still. "She knew I'd go for it. It was just a way of getting me here to
make sure nothing happened to her Christian buddies. She didn't give a
shit about Bezer'ej."
Rayat shrugged. "You've played this game before, just
as I have. I wonder what elaborate cover briefing she'd have made up if
the nearest foot soldier to hand hadn't been you?"
Shan found she could now control the involuntary
dilation of her pupils. She concentrated on the sensation in her throat
and jaw. She had to. Her stomach fell like a trapdoor opening on a
scaffold.
"That's politicians for you," she said.
This was the onion-skinned conversation: Rayat knew she
was interrogating him. Both were aware of the bluff and counterbluff
but neither was sure where the layer of reality might be. It was
distraction questioning, trying one topic to ease the suspect into
answers before you switched to what you really wanted to know and they
fell into the pit. He knew she did that. He probably thought he was
smarter than her, though. He was probably enjoying telling her how
Perault had set her up.
"Sure you don't want to name Cobalt Man?" said Shan,
struggling with betrayal. "Last chance."
"Some things I take to my grave," he said. Spies had
long been proven to be the most accomplished liars, able to control
their reactions. But she was part wess'har, and she smelled the relief
roll off him. He'd swallowed her line. "Talking of which, you're
probably thinking up a suitable denouement for me."
"No, I'll leave that to Esganikan. Or the bezeri." She
revealed it on a whim, but like all her gut reactions it had its roots
in practiced strategy. "Yes, they found a few survivors."
Rayat's scent reaction was acid surprise. Good.
Ade wandered up to her and stood in front
of Shapakti, who looked welded to the spot.
"Want to go now, Boss? I can't stand the smell of shit
any more."
"Wait outside, Ade." She'd found out what she needed to
know. And she wanted to show Rayat that she could beat him at his own
game. Childish: but she was a child again
right then, hurt and lied to by the grown-ups. Perault had conned her,
just as everyone said she had: but for entirely different reasons, for
trivial, make-believe, religious reasons.
There was no government plan to break the agricorp
cartel on patented food crops. She had been uprooted and sent 150
trillion miles from home because she was convenient and expendable.
It didn't even have anything to do with keeping
Perault's terrorist sister, Helen Marchant, out of the frame.
But Shan still had the gene bank. And now she had
powerful alien friends who could do something with it, so it was going
back to Earth to bust the agricorps and their ilk. Her only regret now
was that Perault was long dead and she'd never be able to see the shock
on her face when she actually completed the mission. People who thought
she was just another plod always got a nasty surprise.
And that included Rayat. Now suck
on this, you smug bastard.
"I might as well tell you," she said. "C'naatat
survived on Ouzhari too, and Ade's got
a dose. I'm sorry your journey was wasted."
A scent-burst of anxiety. Oh,
this is good. "I know about Ade."
"Okay, ask Shapakti about what he found on Ouzhari.
Wess'har aren't very good liars."
Shapakti, ever literal, opened his mouth to speak but
Rayat held up his hand to silence him. "Jesus, Frankland, I hope you've
got a bloody good plan for keeping this thing out of human reach."
"I haven't, but Eqbas Vorhi has," she said. "And I'll
go along with theirs."
She didn't stop to study Rayat's face. She walked out
of the tunnel, reassured that she still had the edge and ashamed at
giving in to professional vanity. Operation Green Rage was fresh in her
mind again: she had kept her collusion with the eco-terrorists to
herself, playing the incompetent right to the end, even when she was
busted for letting them get away. She'd swallowed the humiliation. You
did it because it mattered, not so you could let
everyone know how fucking noble you were. She still felt
cheated. That was what she didn't like.
She realized that she didn't like being made to look a fool, and she
wanted so much to be above those petty concerns.
Terrible events were sweeping whole worlds. Shan
Frankland's personal anxieties meant nothing.
Ade caught her arm hard enough to jerk her back. "Whoa,
Boss. What's wrong?"
"Just doing a bit of growing up."
"Does it really matter why Perault sent you here? Isn't
it what happens that matters?"
"Very wess'har. That obvious, is it?"
"I know when you're upset."
"The bitch lost her nerve about the Suppressed Briefing
she'd given Rayat and she used me to salve her conscience over the
fucking colony, to make sure they weren't touched. She manipulated my
green sympathies to get me out here. I fell for it."
"She SB'd you."
"A Suppressed Briefing isn't brainwashing, remember.
You can say no. She needed me to say yes because there was nobody else
she could send at the time, when she had to."
"So what's pissing you off? Just getting picked because
you were the nearest thing to hand, and not because you were better
than anyone else? Or being lied to by a politician? Happens to us
all the time."
Ade was right on both counts. Soldiers lived with
cynical exploitation: and she'd automatically thought she'd been chosen
because she was so bloody perfect. So this is
your come-uppance for conceit.
She shrugged, humbled by his courage in telling her
what she really didn't want to hear. "You're right. It really doesn't
matter any more. Let's finish the job."
Shapakti tugged cautiously at her sleeve, clearly
impatient with what he saw as a superfluous debate on motivation. "May
we take more samples please?"
Shan nodded, and Ade steered Shapakti into the camp.
She went to sit on the beach and wait for them.
Bezer'ej was a huge crescent moon in the late afternoon
sky, as shockingly exotic as Wess'ej had been when Josh Garrod had
first pointed it out to her and told her that it was inhabited. Ade and
Shapakti returned about fifteen minutes later, talking quietly. Shan
turned to smile at Ade, seeing him for a moment as the man she'd taken
a fancy to rather than a test of her fidelity, but he looked shaken.
He was unusually quiet all the way back to the
mainland. It was only when they had been picked up by the
transport--more like a mattress on a hovercraft than a vehicle--that he
spoke.
"If Shapakti can stop humans catching c'naatat,"
he said, "where does that leave us?"
Shapakti said nothing. Shan wondered what he had been
discussing with Ade: but Ade was an open book. He never kept secrets,
nor from her anyway.
"We'd be safer, Ade," she said. "A lot safer."
Things were not going as planned.
Eddie checked the fit of the ballistic vest again. The
Eqbas ship had landed but it hadn't yet lowered its ramp. He stared in
carefully controlled horror at the bulkhead image as wave after wave of
what he could only describe as gunfire hit the outer hull from the
perimeter of the landing strip. He could understand how useful a
see-through hull could be but that was scant comfort for his nerves.
It didn't seem to bother the Eqbas crew any more than
it bothered the mindless bee cam. The camera wove slowly from angle to
angle, taking its pick of the image: the Eqbas simply watched.
Ual was a Christmas tree of shivering ornaments, his
quills almost at right angles to his bulky oval body.
"Please cease firing," said Esganikan. Ralassi repeated
her request in isenj and Edie realized the message was being relayed
outside the hull.
The barrage continued. Esganikan shifted on her seat
and repeated the cease-fire request. Eddie had the feeling it was the
Eqbas equivalent of a police officer's warning before firing; two of
the bridge crew were taking great interest in a control panel.
"Very well," said Esganikan. "Cease firing immediately
or we will respond. We wish only to meet your administration and to
return Minister Ual."
There was a pause. Then the firing increased in
intensity, peppering the illusion of a glass hull with thousands of
exploding pinpoints of light.
"Suppress the fire," said Esganikan.
"Is that necessary?" said Ual.
Esganikan didn't even move her head. "We can sit here
and wait for your people to run out of ammunition, or we can leave, or
we can disembark and face the barrage."
"I would rather talk to them. Let me leave the ship."
"We are under fire."
"I'm an isenj minister of state. Whatever abuse my
colleagues might heap upon me, it's simply words. I can walk out there
and persuade them to hear you out."
"You're not our prisoner and you're free to leave, but
I still think this is foolhardy."
Esganikan was a soldier. Eddie suspected she'd met
quite a few welcoming committees like this one, because it didn't seem
to bother her at all. "Why don't you let me talk to them? I'm human.
I'm neutral."
"I'll do this," said Ual. "Tell them I'm coming out."
Esganikan's long hands were clasped in front of her
chest and she was absolutely immobile. "Go, then. It will not alter
what happens in the longer term."
Eddie got up and followed Ual to the hatch. "I'm still
coming with you," he said, but he didn't know why. It was a reflex:
something was happening and he had to rush to see it. He had a
ballistic vest. There was no point scrawling MEDIA
across the chest because the isenj behind the guns almost certainly
didn't read English. If they did, he had no guarantee that his status
would afford him any protection. It was like any foreign war.
"You have no protective headwear," said Ual.
The interior of the ship was as fluid and malleable as
the external hull, an adaptable ship for a rigid people. They were now
standing in a space that felt enclosed but there was only a thin
transparent membrane around them, and Eddie's gaze was fixed on the
exterior view that still filled the bulkhead.
It was like walking into a movie. "We can see them. Can
they see us?"
"No," said Esganikan. "When you have composed yourself,
we will create an opening."
"I will leave now and you will walk behind me," said
Ual.
I should have asked Ade how to
do this, thought Eddie. The bee cam was close to his head. This
is a beachhead landing. The front goes down and
out you go. Oh God oh God oh God. Where's my breather mask?
The bulkhead parted. It wasn't an image any longer.
Eddie could smell burning and he inhaled dust. He was right behind Ual,
close enough to notice his wet forest scent. The minister's beads were
rattling as he made his inelegant way down the ramp that was forming in
front of them.
There was absolute silence. The firing had stopped.
Ual let out a stream of high-pitched sounds. Was anyone
close enough to hear him? Eddie didn't know what to look for at the
perimeter fence and in the port buildings but he knew it was a
battlefield and his instinct scanned for movement or any cue to duck or
run.
Ual moved forward one slow pace at a time. Eddie
followed. His feet were still on the ramp when Ual trod on the dusty
landing field of Jejeno and a loud crack of expanding air and shrill
noise deafened him.
Something straw-colored hit his vest. Something threw
him flat on his back and the last thing he saw was the bee cam hovering
above him. Something had gone badly wrong.
He had no idea that isenj blood looked like thin yellow
plasma.
I now believe we
can extract the c'naatat organism from
human tissue. This will reduce the risk of severe environmental
consequences if more gethes were to become
carriers of the symbiont. But we should still regard it as a life-form
to be protected by quarantine.
DA SHAPAKTI
biologist-physician, Wess'ej mission
Nevyan knew now that her gut feel,
as Shan called it, had not been wrong.
And she had one question, a selfish one.
"Is Eddie hurt? What happened to him?"
Giyadas clung to her legs. Lisik and Livaor watched the
communications link in silence. Cidemnet had gone to fetch their fourth
house-brother Dijuas and the other children.
"He is alive," said Esganikan. The image showed calm
routine behind her on the ship's bridge.
"Eddie, Eddie, Eddie," trilled Giyadas. "Bring him
back. Bring him back. I will look after him."
Esganikan Gai had gone too far. The landing on Umeh had
been opposed--and that was another gethes
understatement Nevyan had learned, this time from Ade Bennett. Opposed
was an odd way to describe a furious
barrage of fire.
Esganikan didn't seem perturbed by it. "Minister Ual
was shot. We neutralized the resistance at Jejeno airfield and we
secured an entry point at Umeh Station. They have human physicians
there."
"Ual is dead?"
"We believe so. They began firing when the hatch
opened."
Isenj were fast-breeding polluters but they were also
orderly, urban, and restrained with each other. Nevyan struggled to
understand that they had opened fire on one of their own. It was an
indication of their fear, what Eddie called a knee-jerk.
"What do you mean by securing an entry?"
"We created a corridor."
"I don't understand."
"My apologies, Nevyan Chail.
I forget that you have obsolete technology. We have created an enclosed
environment to isolate Umeh Station, one hundred meters by their
reckoning at ground level and a thousand meters into airspace. That
enables us to come and go without encountering isenj for the time
being."
Nevyan was beginning to understand just how much
further the Eqbas had taken adaptive material technology. She clutched
the collar of her dhren to her throat, a
nervous habit, and the fabric reshaped itself. Like the tables that
would emerge from walls in the communal library, the technology was the
manipulation of molecular structure: but the Eqbas could now use it to
make fluid, ever-reshaping spacecraft and sea-going vessels and
impregnable corridors. Nevyan understood for a moment the
disorientation of sudden inferiority that the gethes
had faced. Wess'ej had been the pinnacle of technology in the Ceret
system, and now it was not.
As long as the Eqbas were kin and allies, that was no
threat.
"You shouldn't have interfered with the isenj on their
homeworld," said Nevyan. "There is no other species at risk there. And,
with the exception of Bezer'ej, they have never attacked us."
"Ual asked us for assistance, and the isenj will not
relinquish their claim on Bezer'ej. So we have choices--we teach them
to
live within their own boundaries, or we confine them to their planet,
or we destroy them."
"Targassat taught that the more choices you have, the
more restrained you must be in making them."
"Targassat did not accept the responsibility that comes
with power, which is why your ancestors fled here to avoid it. Eqbas
Vorhi accepts that if it can improve the
equity and stability of worlds, then it must.
It is a matter of interpretation."
Nevyan felt she was losing the debate. Esganikan was
comfortable in a warship millions of miles away, out of the influence
of jask. Nevyan's defensive instinct
welled up and the room fell into silence, even Giyadas seeming to
freeze and hold her breath.
Nevyan pressed on. If Shan were here, she'd know what
to do. "You don't have the military capability to take on Umeh with the
forces here."
"Of course we have, and so do you."
"We have barely enough ships to sustain the defense of
Bezer'ej."
"You have pathogens that can selectively target both gethes
and isenj."
No. No, no, no. "Those
are passive measures."
"We should discuss this later."
"Bring Eddie back here. We will care for him."
"As soon as he is ready to be moved, we'll return.
We're assessing the gethes in Umeh Station
at the moment." Esganikan's plumed mane tilted left and right. "They
are very different to the colony on
Mar'an'cas. How diverse human attitudes can be."
Nevyan could feel Giyadas's grip tightening on her leg.
The child was scared. She was reacting to Nevyan's scent and she feared
for Eddie. Eddie took foolish risks but he was, whether he acknowledged
it or not, on their side. Nevyan had had
to learn a whole new set of concepts to accompany her knowledge of
English, because wess'har had only one side to be on.
She switched off the screen and the living room wall
returned to its normal state of gold stone facings.
"Lisik, is Shan Chail back
from Mar'an'cas yet?"
"No, isan. Aras expects
her soon."
"Has she activated her virin?"
Lisik checked his own device. "Yes. Shall I recall her?"
"No, I'll talk to her."
Giyadas suddenly let go and stood straight, pulling
herself up to her full height and emitting a faint but definite scent
of adult anger and jask. She was growing
up fast.
"I know, isanket," said
Nevyan. "I fear for Eddie too. I fear for all of us."
But most of all Nevyan feared what she had unleashed.
And she had to face it, and deal with it: she could never return to her
past, her own world before.
Eddie knew he wasn't back in F'nar. The rest
was guesswork.
At any given moment he was very clear what was
happening to him, but when he tried to move from that single
freeze-frame to a coherent sequence of events he wasn't sure what had
happened at all.
He was in Umeh Station. He could just as easily have
been back in his cabin in the Thetis camp
on Bezer'ej if it had still existed. The walls had that same watery
green light and the place smelled of cleaning fluid. The flashback
impression was reinforced by voices he thought he recognized.
"He's not unconscious," said a male voice. "He didn't
lose consciousness. The ussissi said so."
"Eddie? Eddie?" Someone had hold of his forearm. "It's
Kris, Eddie. How are you feeling?"
"Where's Ual?"
"Come on, Eddie, talk to me. Can you see me?" She
caught his jaw in her hand and turned his head to face her. It was
Kristina Hugel, the medic from the Thetis
payload, and she was running a handscanner over his head. He could hear
it clicking, bouncing sound waves through his skull to detect fracture
and hemorrhage. "Can you see me okay, Eddie?"
"Kris?"
"Good boy. You're okay. You were hit but you're okay.
More blood than real damage. Any pain?"
His mouth was dry and he had a dull headache. "Hit
where? Where's Ual?" He was aware his shirt was covered in blood, real
red human blood, so it had to be his. "Who's got my camera?"
"It followed you in and we didn't know how to switch it
off."
Eddie was damned if he was going to be kept flat on his
back. He struggled to sit up. "Hit where?"
"You got hit in the head by something sharp. It's taken
a slice out of your scalp but you'll be okay in a few days."
"You're not answering me. Where's Ual?"
"I don't know. The Eqbas brought you in and they're
strutting round the place like storm troopers at the moment."
"Get Esganikan."
"Who's he?"
"She. The commander. The big female with the Mohican
hairdo."
Kris smelled of old-fashioned antiseptic and stale
coffee. She turned away to someone. "Vani, see if the ussissi can help,
will you?" She caught Eddie by the shoulders just as he was about to
put all his weight on his feet. "I wouldn't wander around if I were
you. It's a bit chaotic here."
"Christ, that's par for the course. There's a war
starting out there."
"Is it true they've recalled Thetis
to ship us back?"
"God, I don't know. It'll take the best part of a year
or more if they have, and it's going to be a hairy old year to wait
out."
He listened. He couldn't hear firing. He wasn't sure if
noise would travel through the sealed shell of the dome, but he thought
he'd at least be able to feel the vibrations of explosions.
"Please, let me get up."
Kris Hugel offered him an arm to lean on. He caught a
glimpse of himself in the mirror above the hand basin. He was in the
infirmary. The gash in his scalp looked horrific, an angry stripe with
the hair shaved away and the wound simply sealed with basic first-aid
dermabond. He couldn't remember that happening at all.
"I'm a mess," he said. "How can I do a piece to camera
looking like this? I need to know what happened to Ual. I've got to
find Esganikan."
"You're concussed, Eddie. Just take it easy."
No. It was his personal
responsibility now. He had helped Ual arrange the snatch of Lindsay and
Rayat. He was now so far across the neutral line that he knew he would
never function as a journalist again, and he hadn't actually noticed
the final point at which he had abandoned all the rules. It was
incremental. The thin end of the wedge was very hard to spot when you
were staring at it head on.
He tottered out of the three-room complex that made up
the infirmary with Kris Hugel steering him by the elbow. The dome was
surprisingly quiet, but packed with humans and more ussissi than he'd
ever seen assembled in one place, even when they had last evacuated
Jejeno when they thought Wess'ej would launch a retaliatory attack.
"That's not good," he said.
Ralassi sought him out. He was carrying a couple of
bags that looked like rough-woven sacks. "Are you fit to travel?"
"Why? What?"
"No ussissi will serve the isenj now. That means no
shuttles between Umeh and Tasir Var, or between continents. When we ask
for our separateness to be respected, we mean it. Are you leaving with
us?"
"What about us, then?" said Hugel. "What happens until Thetis
arrives?"
"The same as would have happened otherwise," said
Ralassi. "You survive. The Eqbas will protect the corridor until it's
time for you to leave."
Eddie struggled for a grasp of reality. "What do you
mean, protect the corridor?"
Ralassi pointed up into the canopy of the dome. The
translucent filters and the tangle of vines obscured the view of the
sky. "You can walk outside if you like. It's secure."
Adrenaline was a wonderful thing. Eddie shook off
Hugel's arm and swayed his way to one of the exits. Normally he had to
put on a breather mask to cope with the atmosphere outside,
sulfur-tainted and low on oxygen even by the standards he'd
acclimatized to on Bezer'ej: but the air outside felt… normal. As he
looked out across the service road towards the building-upon-building
city that crowded up to the perimeter, he couldn't work out what was
different, and then he realized there were two notable things.
There were almost no isenj in the streets. Jejeno was
usually heaving with bodies. And there was something familiar: the heat
haze effect of an encircling barrier, like the one that surrounded
Constantine, except he now knew this one would do more than simply
filter out alien cells or trigger alarms. He followed the wall of haze
above the level of the buildings, tilting his head back as far as the
pain would allow, and saw the Eqbas ship holding steady in the sky
right above Umeh Station.
It was how Eddie used to dispose of spiders. A glass
upturned over the creature, a piece of stiff paper slipped underneath,
and he could carry the spider to an open window and dump it outside. He
never did believe in killing spiders. And now he was under the upturned
glass, dependent on the kindness of big incomprehensible creatures who
might allow him to scuttle away, or who might just as easily crush him.
Bronze droplets appeared to be falling from the ship.
Three of them descended like elevators without cables. It was only when
they were around 200 meters from the ground that it dawned on Eddie
that they were more detached parts of the ship ferrying personnel to
and from the dome.
"I hate this helpless feeling."
Kris Hugel stood beside him and looked up too. "I know
I should marvel at all this but I just want to go home. I thought I was
going back the first time and they thawed us out. But this time, I am
absolutely not coming back."
Eddie's gratitude for medical assistance had
evaporated. "If you'd kept your mouth shut about Frankland's parasite,
none of this would have happened."
"Oh, and you weren't digging around and speculating
about it. I hallucinated that, did I?"
"Okay, we all played our part in this fucking mess."
"Is it true?"
"What?"
"That she survived being spaced."
"Yeah. Right as rain."
"Jesus."
"Just walk away, Kris. Walk away, like she told you the
first time."
Beyond the upturned glass of the Eqbas shield, isenj
had started to venture out into the streets again. Eddie sat down on
the curb that ran around the circumference of Umeh Station, feet in the
gutter, and supported his head in shaking hands.
A shadow fell across him and it wasn't Ralassi's. He
didn't need to look up.
"Just tell me what happened to Ual," he said.
Esganikan didn't sit down beside him. He expected her
to, but then he realized why and reminded himself that for all her
similarities with Shan, she was utterly alien and had none of Shan's
capacity for psychological subtlety.
"He died," she said. "He was wrong. His countrymen did open
fire, even if they did not intend him
to die. The result is the same. And now the factions appear to be
clashing--those who want to wage war on us and those who favor asking
for our aid rather than the alternative."
"You sound like you've played this game before."
"We are seldom welcome. By definition, we arrive
because matters have gone badly wrong."
"So what are you going to do now?"
"Wait and see what happens. There is no other species
at risk here, and we can come and go as we please."
"You had a complement of two thousand crew, tops. This
planet has a population of billions. Even you can't crack those odds."
"I had this very conversation with Nevyan Tan Mestin.
If we need a weapon, we already have one--the engineered pathogen
deployed on Bezer'ej."
Eddie's scalp tightened and it wasn't because of the
gash in it. You promised. Shan, you promised they
wouldn't.
"No," he said. "No, you can't use bioweapons here, not
that one--"
"I didn't say we would."
Esganikan wouldn't have been playing games like a
human. She was simply answering his questions in a logical, literal
order. Shan, you said they'd never use it t o
attack Umeh. That was why he agreed to get a sample of isenj
DNA, to use his access to Ual. It was the ultimate betrayal. The guy
was dead, and he had helped him reach that point, and now he was the
procurer of weapons, every bit as bad as all the scientists he'd
despised in history for creating bombs and diseases and other tricks
for the use of politicians.
"Poor bastard," he said. He thought he meant Ual. "You
poor bastard." And he sat crying quietly in the gutter of a besieged
human enclave twenty-five light-years from home.
Superintendent
Frankland,
I'm responding
to your message, which was forwarded to me. I'm afraid Granddad passed
away four months ago. He hadn't been well for some time. He used to
talk about you all the time and I know it would have meant a lot to him
to know you still thought about him.
Yours,
JAY MCEVOY HARRIS,
granddaughter of Chief Constable Robert McEvoy
"He'll be okay, kid," said Shan.
Giyadas had a firm grip on Shan's leg and it was a
measure of his isan's discomfort that Aras
couldn't smell her scent at all. She was suppressing it again. She
didn't like being around children, not even little adults like Giyadas.
Ade, taking excessive care over brewing the tea, caught his eye: they
exchanged a glance, silently working out who was going to extract her
from the grip.
"This was unexpected," said Nevyan.
"You bet."
"I am to blame for summoning them."
"No, they're to blame for going in mob-handed." Shan
kept glancing down at Giyadas. It was clear that she didn't like being
pinned to the spot but she seemed reluctant to push the child aside.
"Maybe this is none of my business, but I'm bloody uncomfortable with
the idea of Eqbas having the engineered pathogens. Isenj or
human."
"Come with me. Dissuade Esganikan."
Shan's arms were folded tight across her chest. Aras
could see the faint flicker of violet light leaking from her clenched
fists, and he moved to steer Giyadas away by her shoulder. "I'll
dissuade her, all right," said Shan. "They didn't need to go crashing
in there. Do you think they can contain the isenj without needing to
use bioweapons?"
"They say they can. But further support is years away."
"Y'know, I'm not someone who likes to talk their way
out of trouble when there's a quicker way of doing the job, but I think
talking is just what's needed now."
"I think you should stay out of it," said Ade.
"I'm not asking you," said Shan.
Aras intervened more from the disappointment of a
broken promise than to back up his house-brother in waiting. "You
promised you would leave Esganikan to pursue her own course unless she
interfered with the gene bank."
"Let's get one thing straight," said Shan. "This is
what I do. I sort things out. I can help Nevyan defuse this situation
and I don't even need my gun to do it, so let me just do what I do best
and then we can all get on with our lives. Right now, Attila the Parrot
is considering wholesale slaughter and even I feel uneasy about that."
"Part of the ship will be back in an a few hours," said
Nevyan. "The remainder is maintaining the corridor while more
transports go to evacuate the ussissi. They're all leaving."
"Well, that'll give the isenj a few logistics problems
to keep them busy." Shan seemed to soften towards Giyadas, or at least
to feign concern very well. There was still no scent. She squatted down
to look the isanket straight in the eye.
"Sweetheart, Eddie's okay. He's probably very upset, though, but if he
comes back angry it won't be with you."
"I know that," said Giyadas. "He'll be angry with you."
Aras didn't think Shan cared what anyone thought of
her, but he was wrong. The constricting blood vessels in her face gave
her an instant pallor.
"Right again, kid."
She stood up and took the bowl of tea that Ade offered
her. Aras thought he detected an attempt at placatory eye contact, but
Ade was having none of it and wouldn't look at her. They all drank in
silence.
There was a knock at the door. It inched open and
Shapakti peered around it. "May I speak to Shan
Chail?"
"She's a bit busy," said Ade.
"It really is very important."
"Not now, Shapakti," said Shan. "I've got something to
sort out. I'll catch you later."
Shapakti hesitated for a few seconds then slid back
across the threshold and closed the door. Shan drained her bowl and
rinsed it under the spigot.
"Okay, Nev," she said. "Let's go. Mango time."
It was always a bad sign when Shan attempted humor.
Aras and Ade were now alone with their doubts.
"She's put on a bit more meat in the last day or so,"
said Ade, transparently upset even though he tried to disguise the
fact. "I reckon she's nearly back to normal."
"Don't be alarmed by her manner. She does care about
us."
Us. Yes, it was a case of
us. Once the current crisis had receded,
things would settle down.
They had to.
There were an awful lot of ussissi.
They streamed down the ramp of the transport and moved
across the plain in an unbroken column in the direction of the little
Easter-egg domed village where Shan had nearly found out the hard way
how they attacked. She watched them with Nevyan and Serrimissani.
"No customs control, then?"
"There are many more to come," said Serrimissani,
ignoring her. She had collected a couple of sacks from one of the new
arrivals, and Shan noted that without inquiring about the contents. Old
habits died hard. "Some have joined the search for Vijissi's body. This
is quite appalling. We have never been compromised like this before."
"Where's Esganikan?"
"I have no more idea than you."
"Have you got a problem with me or are you just always
fucking rude?"
"My apologies." But she didn't sound as if she meant it.
Nevyan waited with her hands clutched at the collar of
her dhren, her classic nervous gesture. Come on, buck up,
Shan thought. But Nevyan was
just a kid herself, thrust into adulthood a matter of months ago under
trying circumstances. Shan wondered if she'd have been as capable of
statesmanlike behavior at the equivalent age.
No, she didn't think she had. But she'd been well able
to handle herself in a fight. And this wasn't even a fight: no blows
needed trading and no guns needed to be drawn. All she had to do was
want her own way, and mean it. The trick was not to become so
aggressive that she overwhelmed Esganikan and found herself in command
of an Eqbas army for the next five years.
What's going to happen when they
reach Earth?
She put it to the back of her mind. Humans had asked
for it. There was work to be done on Earth. Umeh was too far down the
toilet.
They could wipe out humanity if
they set their minds to it. Are you okay with that?
She found she couldn't get that worked up about it and
waited in grim silence with Nevyan while the wind whipped up her
trouser legs. She bent down and tucked them into her make-do wess'har
boots. It was unusually cold weather for F'nar, they said. She found it
pleasantly cool.
And it struck her that she was more worried about the
isenj than her own kind.
Nevyan consulted her virin. "Esganikan
travels on board the next vessel," she said.
"Okay, we don't let her disembark. We get her in her
cabin. Enclosed space." Shan decided she could always hand control to
Chayyas or Mestin if things went wrong. "Why does it work like that?"
"Work like what?"
"Jask. How come I face down
Chayyas and she cedes her dominance, but we can take on Esganikan
without her ceding to either of us?"
"Everyone's jask is
unique. If matriarchs ceded to communal scents nobody would ever be
able to take responsibility, which is how we're influenced by the
common will. A fail-safe mechanism, I think you call it."
"I still prefer slugging it out, I think."
"Nobody is injured by jask."
"Okay, then let's make sure we don't go over the top
with this."
"I can't take on her role. I know my limits."
"It won't come to that."
Shit, it might.
On the horizon, now deep turquoise with the failing
light, three dark smooth shapes appeared and a characteristic boom
shook the air. They slowed and hung almost motionless above a cluster
of lava plugs. Then they came together and merged. And one ship landed.
"Jesus," said Shan. "How can any defense force deal
with that? I mean, you think the enemy's
sailing up the river in a bloody great destroyer and then you blink and
they've got five frigates. Holy shit."
"As long as they are on our side,
as you put it, this can only be good."
"And are they?"
Nevyan was a cloud of acid anxiety. "I believe they are
fundamentally like us even if they're less
restrained. They want to create a more permanent base here."
"Like the Temporary City?"
"Yes."
"And what have you said?"
"You can't ask for someone's aid and then deny them
what they need to give it. And their way of life is too different for
them to settle in the city for the next few years."
"It'll work out."
"I know I can rely on you."
It almost didn't make sense. But wess'har were full of
non sequiturs.
The ship settled. Heat shimmered beneath the hull as
the craft lowered itself to the ground until it was as flat and solid
as a building. Shan found herself standing at the hatch as soon as it
formed in the bulkhead, even before the ramp extruded from it. The
Eqbas who was on the other side of it didn't seem startled.
"Nevyan and I will be seeing Esganikan Gai in her
cabin," said Shan. "Show me where it is."
The ship's interior still disoriented Shan because it
was all shifting light and shadow, triggering her wess'har low-light
vision but also leaving her with the unsettling feeling of being in a
mirrored and deceptive shopping mall, a difficult place to pursue a
suspect. A bulkhead melted and Esganikan appeared in front of her.
The matriarch focused on Shan with snapping four-lobed
pupils, head tilting. You really can't gauge me
without the scent, can you? Then she stared past her at Nevyan.
"You are anxious," said Esganikan. "Ual was most
unfortunate but Eddie Michallat is recovering."
"Fine, but that's not what we wanted to talk to you
about," said Shan.
The Thetis payload had
been worried about Shan's lack of training in alien contact; they'd be
shitting themselves now. Esganikan looked as if she was planning to
walk past both of them but Shan stood her ground, feeling herself on
the tightrope that separated authority from overkill. Keeping a rein on
her scent was like trying to control a sneeze. She was aware of the
physical sensations now: she concentrated on contracting muscles in her
neck.
"Are the prospects for your own planet bothering you?"
"Depends what you mean by my planet," said Shan. "But
right now we're not happy about the use of the isenj pathogen."
"I haven't used it."
"And we don't want you to," said Nevyan.
A few crew members wandering around the ship stopped to
watch, and then stood very still in the wess'har alarm reflex.
"It might be necessary," said Esganikan.
Shan stepped a little closer, close enough to start a
fight on Earth. "Let's get this clear. As long as they stay put on Umeh
and don't bother us, or Bezer'ej, or any other planet, then you don't
deploy bioweapons."
"That is the way it has been here for generations,"
said Nevyan. "Apart from Bezer'ej, they have never staged incursions."
"You fear for your fellow humans in Jejeno."
"I couldn't give a shit
about Umeh Station," said Shan. "You understand that? I don't care. But
the isenj will have to do something extreme to justify attacking them
on their home ground. Mjat was their own fault. There's nothing left of
Umeh to restore so I don't see what you stand to gain by wiping them
out."
"I didn't plan to. But Ual consented to population
control measures, ones we can take without culling."
Shan could taste the sweet fruit scent at the back of
her palate.
Nevyan was standing very close to her. "We still want
your assurance that you won't use the pathogen without our agreement."
Esganikan stood silent, gaze flickering between Shan
and Nevyan. Shan could taste the pheromones getting stronger. Then the
Eqbas simply cocked her head, forced to concede. "Yes," she said. "I
agree. But we will still carry out the birth control measures."
Shan felt a bead of sweat trickle down her spine and
she resisted the urge to scratch it. "Okay."
"Why have you stopped breathing?"
"It's just a habit."
"Do you wish to plead for your own planet now?"
"Where's this going?"
"We were told you were wess'har and that you lived in
balance. Are you losing your resolve and reverting to type?"
"No. Believe me, just because the UN says that it's
banned exploration it doesn't mean anyone will honor that."
"But even if Earth does curtail its expansion, we're
still obliged to intervene. There are many other Earth species in need
of assistance."
Yes, Esganikan was right, and it hurt: Shan was
losing her nerve. But it wasn't because she
thought they were wrong. It was because she was uneasy about the
potential violence that would be on her conscience. And Esganikan
wasn't taunting her: Shan had misunderstood the Eqbas's motive because
she had slipped back into thinking like a gethes.
Esganikan was simply trying to explain the situation.
Like all wess'har, she was seeking a binding consensus. "When you
investigated crime, did you wait for the perpetrator to call you to ask
you to aid their victim?"
And Shan understood. She
understood not in the intellectual way of the legislator, or of the
officer called to abide by laws of evidence, but at a gut level that
said coppers don't just stand by and let it
happen. Fuck the rules. She was picking up her baton again and
sorting things out the old-fashioned way, because it was right.
She thought like an Eqbas and that made her
uncomfortable.
But after a few seconds it didn't feel that
uncomfortable at all. Humans would have to live with the consequences
of exploitation. It was simple. It was what she had always believed
deep down.
"You won't get any argument from me," said Shan.
Nevyan, steeped in the isolationist, mind-your-own
business culture of Targassat, turned and walked away briskly.
Esganikan took it as the end of the conversation and disappeared in the
other direction. Shan was left standing alone for a few seconds, not
quite understanding what had happened. The wess'har lack of valediction
always wrong-footed her.
She caught up with Nevyan outside. The young matriarch
exuded that vinegary scent that went with anger. Her pupils were
dilated. She rounded on Shan.
"I find this very hard," she said. "Forgive me for my
anger, but you encourage the Eqbas taste for interfering."
"Hey, it's my planet, and it's fucked. We need
them. And the isenj could do with not
knocking out so many kids."
"You haven't seen what the Eqbas can do."
"Oh, but I have. Eddie showed me the pictures of the
worlds they've sorted out. Anyway, they're wess'har so whatever they
do, they won't be screwing the underdog and exploiting those who can't
help themselves, which is one hundred percent of the nonhuman life on
Earth and a bloody big chunk of the human population, too."
"This intervention is why our two communities went our
separate ways."
"I know all that. But your idyll is over, Nev. The
galaxy changes. My filthy species is on the loose and it was only a
matter of time before Eqbas noticed us. If they leave you alone, and
they don't bother the isenj, will that make you happy? Because if you
want them to be any different, then you're exactly the same as
them--imposing your values on others."
Nevyan was walking fast towards the city, as fast as
Shan could cover the ground: they were the same height, Nevyan short
for a wess'har, Shan tall for a human female.
"I can't argue with your logic," she said. "But I feel
afraid."
"You need to talk to someone who's faced real danger.
Talk to Ade. Talk to Aras."
Nevyan stopped and swung round. Shan's instinct said draw your
weapon and she knew it was stupid, but
she felt it anyway and sidestepped instead. Nevyan didn't appear to
guess what had flashed through her mind. She was fidgeting with her dhren.
"I know I'm afraid of change," said Nevyan. "For F'nar,
I represent huge change, and to you I must seem like stagnation. But I
can't help what I feel."
"It's okay." Shan wanted to comfort her. She was
handling a situation that would have made seasoned politicians back
home crap themselves, and the kid should have been proud of that.
Instead she was scared, and Shan couldn't even bring herself to hug
her. She gripped her upper arm instead. "It's okay. I understand. There
are things that you take in your stride that scare me."
The still silence was awkward. "Shapakti is anxious to
talk to you."
"I know. But I ought to apologize to Ade first. I was
rude to him. He deserves respect."
"Yes, make things right with your jurej've.
We'll talk in the morning."
Shan let Nevyan stride ahead while she ambled and
finally fell behind. F'nar was speckled with pinpricks of light,
utterly magical even in the dusk. She could be sure that dinner would
be on the table when she got back, and an uninvited memory of her
police colleagues at Western Division sprang into her mind. She was
walking into the police sports and social club bar across the road from
divisional headquarters, shift complete, pleased with herself, looking
forward to a single beer, because she didn't like surrendering control
to alcohol. Did I have a busy day? Oh, I just
averted interplanetary genocide, nothing serious. Who's buying me a
pint?
She missed them. She thought about them less and less
these days, but it was still hard to accept they were probably all
dead. Rob McEvoy was dead too. She didn't even know if she'd helped him
step into the gap she'd left. She hoped so.
The world was still full of good people who deserved
better. She was never sure if she was one of them.
Wess'har didn't have mirrors but Ade didn't
need to shave now anyway. He could see very few changes that c'naatat
had made to him, but he could tell that
it didn't see the point of having body hair.
He'd get used to it. He propped the polished metal
sheet against the wall and brushed his teeth, staring at a distorted
reflection that looked near enough the same Ade Bennett he was used to
seeing.
How much longer would the toothbrush last? He examined
the bristles. If the wess'har could build self-repairing warships then
a duplicate brush wouldn't be a problem. Salt and lavender oil made a
good enough dentifrice, too; it was only for cosmetic purposes, because
c'naatat would see off any tooth decay. He
just wanted to be sure that he tasted okay if he ever got lucky with
Shan.
He bent over the birdbath-shaped washbasin and rinsed,
rubbing his tight-shut eyes, then stood up to bury his face in a sek
towel. It smelled of cut grass.
"So that's the tattoo that
hurt," said Shan.
Ade clutched the towel to his groin, mortified. "I
didn't hear you come in."
"My fault. I didn't knock." She seemed to be trying
hard to look him in the eye and not succeeding. She made a visible
effort to raise her eyes from his crotch. "I just wanted to apologize
for telling you to mind your own business in front of everyone. Not
nice. Sorry. I know you worry."
"It's okay."
"I don't think private apologies are
okay, actually, so I'll repeat it when the others are around."
"Really, it doesn't matter." Please,
go away. Let me put my pants on. "I've got something for you."
"You're not kidding."
"No, I've really got
something for you." He gestured towards the door with one hand, holding
the towel in place with the other and knowing he looked about as stupid
as he could get. "Go into the living room. Go on."
Shit, shit, shit. He
could never do this right. He wrapped the towel around his waist and
padded out after her. The sack was still on the flagstones by the door:
knowing how much she was still the archetypal copper, he was surprised
that she hadn't taken a look inside. If she had, she wasn't saying.
"This is for you," he said.
She held the sack slightly away from her body,
two-handed, and opened it cautiously. "Uhhh,"
she said. He'd never seen such a spontaneous expression of delight on
her face before. It transformed her. She was illuminated. She reached
in and lifted out the precious, hard-won pair of rigger's boots. "Aww,
Ade, I thought you'd forgotten."
"I never forget that kind of thing."
"These are great. Just the
job."
"Sorry about the color. I was working on getting them
dyed black somehow."
"Brown's fine. Don't you worry about that." She seemed
totally distracted by the boots and he wondered how much else he simply
didn't know about her. She was a straightforward, practical woman,
satisfied by sensible things, with no mystery or whim or mood to fathom
out. "And I snarled at you. Sorry. Not sure how I can make up for that."
"I've thought of something."
"Saucy bugger."
"Okay, that was out of order."
"No, it's not out of order at all. I offered,
remember?" She put the boots carefully by the door, side by side, still
glowing with admiration as she gazed at them. Then Ade realized she was
concentrating on them a little too hard. He wondered when she might say
the word openly. "It's not you, Ade, it's me. I know it's what Aras
wants and I want it to be that way too, but I just have to get my head
straight before…you know."
Ade knew only too well. He was a complication. He was a
dilemma in Shan's dead straight, old-fashioned right-and-wrong world;
he knew without asking that she had never, ever cheated on a man. Her
honest loyalty was both one of the qualities he loved and a barrier to
getting what he wanted.
"I'm coming between you two," he said. He knew
it. It broke his heart. He had her back,
alive, the impossible fantasy of every bereaved person in history, and
now he was about to make her deeply unhappy. He couldn't bear it. "I'm
going to cause you both a lot of pain and I don't want that."
"Not at all. Not at all, sweetheart. It'll be fine."
Shan was the only person he knew who had to work out
the moral argument before doing something. She never did what she
wanted: she did what was right. It was one
of those things that sounded clean and admirable until you were staring
it in the face and it was about to say no to you.
And right then he found himself thinking not about
being a moment away from having sex with a woman he worshiped, or
complicating her loyalties, but about obeying Lindsay Neville's order
to transport nuclear weapons to Bezer'ej.
"I'd better put some clothes on," he said. Guilt was a
passion-killer all right. "I'm glad you like the boots."
Shan was staring at his shoulder now. "Did you know
you've developed some bioluminescence?"
He twisted his neck to look at the top of his left arm.
The tattoo he'd had done when he signed up as a marine--the Corps'
globe
and laurel, a defiant reminder that he was finally free of his dad's
unpredictable drunken rages--looked backlit. Faint violet flickers
escaped from under the dark pigment.
"Blimey," he said, desperate to lift the mood. "If it's
in all my tattoos now, at least I'll be
able to find it in the dark."
It was a legacy of the bezeri. And it wasn't funny at
all. It just reminded him that he was a fighting man who hadn't fought
when it most mattered: when he should have refused an unlawful, immoral
order.
Yeah, guilt really turned you off.
Lindsay Neville stood on the Mar'an'cas
shoreline and debated how far out she might have to wade before she
couldn't change her mind and scramble back to shore.
There was nothing she could salvage in her life now.
She had started to come to terms with David's death, and in time she
might come to live with the knowledge that she had helped kill
thousands of sentient beings. But it had all been for nothing.
The parasite had survived, and Shan had survived, and
bezeri had survived. Now the remnant would remember what she had done,
and hate her. That thought bothered her. It disturbed her that she
found their survival another blow and not some measure of relief.
And Shan Frankland hadn't shot her when she was
absolutely, utterly convinced that she would do it without a second
thought. The bitch wouldn't put her out of her misery.
She'd do it herself, then. She cupped her hand and
studied the bioscreen grown into her palm. The living screen was dead,
just a patch of shivering green light, and there were no readouts from
the marines. They were either out of range or they had deactivated
their links, but either way it said the same thing: you're on your
own.
She checked the cloud formation and the wind direction
for a while, still a sailor, and decided now was as good a time as any.
Lindsay wasn't a strong swimmer. The cold made her
catch her breath and she felt the current buffet her as she waded out
into the shallows. Why didn't you just jump?
There's plenty of cliffs. Why pick this beach? Going to change your
mind? All she had to do was strike out and swim until she
couldn't swim any longer. It wasn't going to hurt as much as living
with what she'd become and it would be over, over, over.
They said drowning didn't hurt at all.
The cold was starting to numb her. Two minutes, maybe
five: that was all the time you had in cold water, or so they told you
in survival training. She knew people survived a lot longer. It wasn't
as grand a gesture as stepping out into space but it was the best she
could do.
A wave hit her and she gulped in water, coughing and
choking. The impulse to turn and head back to dry land was almost
overwhelming. But she struck out further, surprised how much she rose
and fell with the choppy waves. She was starting to slip from being in
control of her environment to being overwhelmed by it, the point at
which self-preserving panic would kick in.
No, she wasn't Shan Frankland, making a final gesture
of sacrifice. She was ending it all, just running away. She could hear
her own choking sobs. She didn't have a single noble thought in her
head and she knew she had chickened out of dying the right way once
before, but this time she was going to do it.
Every stroke she took brought her closer to a point
where she couldn't get back. Funny: it seemed so much easier than
pulling the pin on a grenade.
Seawater flooded her mouth again. For the first time
she wondered what might swim in these seas. Maybe she wouldn't drown at
all. Maybe she would fall into the transparent maw of a marine version
of a sheven or an alyat,
or worse.
She wasn't all that far out. It just felt like deep sea
because the coastal shelf fell away sharply beneath her and the
currents changed dramatically.
Then something grabbed her from behind. Sheven.
Don't be stupid: shevens live on Bezer'ej.
But a hand, a human hand with
strong fingers, tipped her chin up and forced her onto her back. She
lashed out. The hand became an arm round her neck and the next
directionless kick she managed was greeted with a crack across the head.
"Relax or I bloody well will
hold you under," said Rayat.
"Sod off--"
"Coward. Bloody little coward."
"Let go."
"You're not getting out of this." He was pulling her
backwards and she was running out of fight. "I can't stand a quitter."
"Fine time--"
"Shut up."
"--to play the hero."
"Shut up. You've got a job to do."
Lindsay kicked a few more times. This time he punched
her hard, a fist right on the top of her head. She wasn't sure if she'd
changed her mind or not. All she knew was that she didn't want to be
where she was right then, with the things that wouldn't ever leave her
mind.
Rayat hauled her back inshore, a textbook rescue.
"Bastard," she said, and coughed up water.
TO:
the Representative from Eqbas Vorhi.
FROM:
The Right Honorable James Matsoukis MAP, Pacific Rim States Lead
Delegate to the United Nations.
On behalf of our
regional government, I invite your delegation to land in our territory.
This is a binding agreement on behalf of the Australasian Republic and
will be honored by all future administrations. We share your concern
for global ecology and we will offer every cooperation. If there is any
action we can take now to prepare for your arrival, please inform this
office.
We welcome to
your assistance. It is a sad indictment of the ability of our nations
to work in partnership when we need to request the arbitration of an
external government.
Rayat made Lindsay a hot mug of broth. She
considered checking it for poison because he wasn't a tea-and-sympathy
kind of man, not at all.
"Coward's way out," he said.
She sipped. "I bet you were great on the suicide
helpline. Don't you have a cyanide capsule you can take?"
They were huddled in the relative warmth of one of the
makeshift greenhouses on Mar'an'cas, but not so close as to touch.
"Well, you either die well or live well, that's my
motto. Have you heard from Frankland?"
"What do you think? And how would she call me? She's
probably begging Esganikan to let her disembowel me."
"She could have killed you back in F'nar, but she
didn't. That tells me there's still room for maneuver."
Lindsay could see colonists going about their business,
blurred into an impressionist painting by the condensation on the
transparent sheeting. "I can't go on with this."
"So you're going to escape from the reality by topping
yourself. Heroic."
"Well, seeing as I'm not good at rolling back the
clock, yes."
"I hear the bezeri that survived are struggling. Ever
thought of offering them a hand?"
"I don't think the Eqbas believe in community service
orders," she said, and slurped the broth. It scalded her lip. "Or maybe
I could go scrub Ouzhari clean."
"If you want atonement, maybe that's what you need."
Rayat wiped his nose against the back of his hand. "But you'd need to
have c'naatat to do that. It's a little
hot."
"Look, I'm going to die," she said. "And you're going
to die too. What are you playing at?"
Rayat had a habit of not blinking, just like Shan.
Lindsay imagined that he was also as adept as Shan at getting people to
do things they didn't want to do, and not by charm. Every conversation
with him left her feeling as if he had done something terrible to her
and then erased her memory of it, leaving only the impression that
she'd been violated in some way. He was looking for an edge, even on
the brink of death.
"I'm just not good at comforting people," he said,
apparently contrite. "Sorry."
He stared into his mug for a moment, facial muscles
slackening for a split second. For that instant she saw not a spook,
but a man who did a dirty, necessary job that nobody else would do, and
had no friends, no lovers, and nobody he could even trust to tell what
kind of a day he had really had. Pity almost ambushed her. But she
shook it off, knowing now what that feeling of violation was.
Wretched or not, Rayat was marvelously manipulative.
"You bastard," she said. She struggled to her feet and
tipped the rest of the broth into the soil bed. "You think you're
sliding out of this? No bloody way. You'll get whatever's coming to me
too, don't you worry. I'll make sure of that."
Rayat stared up at her, still unblinking, and shrugged.
Lindsay stalked out and walked back up the path to the shore and
settled down in the lee of some rocks.
Atonement.
The notion kept circling around her mind, looking for a
chance to strike. You couldn't wipe the slate clean of tens, hundreds
of thousands of deaths, not by doing a
few good deeds. So did that mean she could just shrug and find release
in permanent oblivion, and not even try?
She'd been around the colonists for too long. Perhaps
she was worried subconsciously that there really was some higher
authority she'd have to answer to. It seemed an imminent prospect.
She'd seen crew in extreme danger switch from being openly atheist to
begging some god or other to save them; death's threshold was the one
point in your life when you found out whether you really believed or
not.
What could I do, anyway?
She was a naval officer. Every scrap of training and
every thread of her personality was bound up with responsibility and
duty. She had to act.
But the Eqbas didn't need volunteers. And only Shan
Frankland and her ilk could survive under water.
Lindsay paused.
It was an insane idea. She dismissed it, but it
wouldn't leave. It came back and settled on her shoulder like a
persistent pet bird.
Eddie didn't know if the Australasian offer was
stupidity, arse-kissing surrender, a cynical PR stunt or enlightened
thinking on an unprecedented scale. But he knew it was trouble.
Giyadas sat staring into his face while he watched the
ITX feed, propped on a pile of blankets in Nevyan's warren of excavated
rooms. He didn't find her gaze distracting now. He worked through the
news channels and noted the sliding scale of fighting talk, from the
slight regret of the Sinostates to the over-my-dead-body stance of the
African Assembly.
"They're coming, whatever you say," he said to the
screen.
Giyadas shifted position, but her gaze was fixed.
"I'm not going to drop dead," he said.
"I'm keeping an eye on you. That is the phrase, yes?"
"I'm fine. I've had worse head injuries falling over
drunk."
"Yes, but you have emotional injuries too."
"Like I said, I've had worse."
"When will you visit Shan?"
Eddie wasn't sure why he blamed Shan and he didn't know
quite what he blamed her for. Ual had gambled and lost. Shan had done
what she thought was needed to secure Bezer'ej. It just didn't feel
that way. "I'll leave it a few days."
"Esganikan has agreed not to use bioweapons on Umeh."
"Right."
"She won't. Nevyan and
Shan made her concede."
"Bully for Shan, then." Eddie reached out and ruffled
Giyadas's tufted mane. "I suppose I feel I let a friend down."
"Was Ual your friend?"
"Close enough to make me feel like a heap of shit for
conning him over his DNA."
He didn't know if she understood that, but he imagined
she'd be saying shit before too long. He
took his rolled-up editing screen from his top pocket and flicked
through the list of files waiting to be ITXed back to News Desk if only
the UN portal would let him pass.
He hadn't looked at the bee cam's footage from the
landing. To be more accurate, he hadn't looked at the footage from the
point where the ramp went down. He was certain the bee cam had done
what it was programmed to do and followed the action, which almost
certainly meant graphic images of Ual being shot. Would he use it? The
boundaries of what could be shown to audiences had been burst open
centuries ago. A fat alien spider spraying body fluids wouldn't even
raise an eyebrow.
But to use it, he had to edit it, and that meant
looking at it. And that was what he couldn't do right then. He knew
plenty of colleagues who had calmly cut sequences involving the graphic
deaths of people they knew and even liked, and theyconsidered it a duty
and an act of respect, but Eddie found he was no longer one of them.
How many more reminders do you
need?
"Eddie?"
So if you're not a journalist,
what are you now?
"Eddie? Eddie, have you decided whether you'll return
to Earth with the Eqbas?"
You know, it's not so bad to
rethink who you are.
"I'm not sure, sweetheart. I'm not sure what I'm going
to do at all."
He'd set Lindsay up to be captured and taken for
execution, and not even spoken to her since. He'd pushed propaganda for
one alien power and then helped a minister from another one defy his
government. He'd helped the wess'har develop a bioweapon.
Eddie wondered what might be left of him when he put
his camera down.
Shan didn't like herself much today. She had
fewer days like these as the years wore on, but this morning she felt
like a woman in the most negative sense she could imagine. She was
messing men around. It was silly and girly and she should have known
better.
She leaned against the wall of the washroom and let the
single jet of cold water play on the top of her head by way of penance.
It wasn't the physical stuff that bothered her as much as the voice
deep in her brain that was still saying slut,
slut, slut. She had never thought less of Nevyan for having four
males, so why couldn't she extend that tolerance to herself?
Because you're still wired to
believe that the best thing you can give a male is your exclusivity.
It wasn't. She could see that simply by looking at Aras
and Ade eating breakfast, becoming increasingly… synchronized.
The brother bond was as almost as important as the male-female
relationship, and now she could see that more clearly than ever.
Watching Nevyan's household--quarrelsome, affectionate,
apparently chaotic--was seeing aliens, interesting but separate
creatures however much she admired and liked them. But this bonding was
happening in front of her to people whose reactions and attitudes she
knew intimately, and they were changing.
Aras took some gurut from the range and
Ade placed a tray under them as if by reflex. They were an instant
team. They knew how to fit in with each other now.
And all she had to do was join that team, and
everything would be fine. She didn't want to think the word family.
It had no positive connotations for her.
"You approve of the boots, then," said Aras.
"Yes, just the job."
"Shapakti has called again."
Shan crunched on an overcooked piece of gurut.
"Ade, you didn't bite his head off, did
you?"
"Aras dealt with him."
"And I was most respectful."
"Okay," said Shan. "I'd better go and see what he
wants. Are you sure there's nothing else you two want to discuss with
me?"
Aras and Ade glanced at each other and shrugged, and
Shan wondered if she was beginning to deal with a double act. They
smelled a little agitated. Perhaps that was how wess'har males always
behaved; she'd have to ask Nevyan for advice again, if she was in a
better frame of mind today. Time was when she could do no wrong in
Nevyan's eyes, or in Eddie's, come to that; and now she worried she
could do nothing right.
But at least her jurej've
thought she was okay. And that was what mattered. She gave Aras a
playful swat that got no response and left to call on Da Shapakti.
It was a gray miserable day outside, the sort she
actually liked. And it wasn't just raining. The drops pecked at her
face, turning into sleet, a very rare thing indeed for F'nar. The
pearl-shit icing on the elegant organic swirls and curves of the city
looked like ice. It was the sort of day to come home to an indulgent
tea by the fireside, and for a brief moment she actually missed home.
You must be joking. The
apartment had five alarm systems and you only used one side of the bed.
Don't kid yourself that you abandoned a haven.
Shapakti probably didn't run to toasted pikelets spread
with lavender jelly. Lavender. Aras had
planted lavender, and so all she needed was something sugary that would
set into a gel. It was a noble project and one she intended to devote
herself to when the current situation calmed down. She was still
wondering whether jay fruit might be a
suitable medium when she walked into the scattered camp of ship
fragments in search of Shapakti.
He seemed surprised that she had bothered to come and
see him.
"Do you have time now?" Shapakti always kept at a safe
distance from her, a good clear meter. Now she had stepped down off the
roller coaster of aggression, she realized what a stroppy bitch she
must have seemed to him. Poor bugger: he was just doing his job,
probably as dismayed as she had been at being diverted elsewhere, and
missing his family. "It really is most important, and it is personal."
With or without the Eqbas, this was going to be her
home for a very, very long time. She wondered why she had ever thought
otherwise. And Ade had no more choice than she had, and neither did
Aras, so all she had to do was shake off one more redundant attitude
and get on with life.
"Certainly, son," she said. "Tell me all about it."
The request wasn't unreasonable, but it made
Nevyan uneasy. She stood in the forest of lava plugs out on the F'nar
plain and wondered how visible a small Eqbas settlement might be.
"It would look much like Surang," said Esganikan.
"No, it would be coated in tem
deposits in a very short time."
"Very well, it would be covered in pearl.
It would be disguised somewhat by the lava formations, and it would be temporary."
Nevyan understood why the Eqbas wanted the comfort of a
built settlement. Adaptable as their ships were, the environment was
still limited. They longed for the surroundings of home. But it alarmed
her because it brought them both a step closer together, and Targassat
had been adamant that it was a life they should shun.
It had worked so well for so long.
"We won't intrude," said Esganikan. "We understand."
Nevyan imagined the billowing shapes robed in
iridescence. But it would be demolished in time, and F'nar had built
the Temporary City on Bezer'ej so she had no moral grounds for refusing
this. "I asked for your military support. It's only reasonable that we
should make your lives as easy as we can."
"So we'll begin," said Esganikan.
Nevyan thought of fetching Eddie to watch the
beginnings of the settlement, to record the buildings constructing
themselves out of the raw materials around them. Aras had said the
original gethes city on Ouzhari--the one
he
had removed long before the colonists arrived--had been built in a
similar way from the land itself, but with visible machines. Humans had
their technical limitations. She called home and asked Giyadas to see
if the journalist felt up to venturing out. Nevyan suspected it was his
conscience that was still injured, because his head wound was healing
quite well.
"We all miss home, and no doubt the gethes
do too," said Esganikan. She scuffed her
boot in the gold soil as if checking it for some quality or
characteristic. "We brought back some Earth vegetation from Umeh
Station for Shapakti's colleagues to examine. They want to create a
small terrestrial environment to gain skills in restoring Earth."
"And where might they create this?"
"You have space in your hangars beneath F'nar."
"If you wish to use that…"
"Again, it would be temporary. When we depart for
Earth, it can be dismantled."
Nevyan wondered if Shan and Ade might like the
environment to remain to ease a longing for home. Shan had never shown
signs of missing Earth, although she had made much of being deprived of
her favorite boots, but Ade Bennett seemed a more sentimental person. Jurej've
deserved to be kept happy.
"Proceed," said Nevyan.
She knew what it was like to miss home. She was
beginning to feel on foreign territory already.
"Are you sure about this, Shapakti?" Shan found
her arms had crossed themselves tightly on her chest almost without her
noticing, just the way they did when an interrogation wasn't yielding
answers as fast as she wanted. "Absolutely
sure?"
"It is possible," said
Shapakti. "I have only modeled the procedure based on the specimen you
provided. The bond between the organism and proteins is tenacious, but
it appears to be reversible. I believe we can remove c'naatat
without harming the organism." He
looked at her as if she had scolded him. "We would of course place the
symbionts back in the soil in Ouzhari."
He must have misinterpreted her dismay. She heard the
words remove c'naatat and her stomach
flipped over. No. No, it couldn't be this
way, not now.
She thought of how she yelled and raged at Aras when
she realized he had infected her to save her life. If she'd been
offered the choice then, she would have grabbed it without a second
thought. She had her plans in those days. She'd wanted
to go home. She'd picked out a remote smallholding on the border with
the Cymru Republic, somewhere to grow her illegal unpatented tomatoes,
and she was getting out of EnHaz because she had done a lifetime's duty
and it was time for her.
Then Eugenie Perault had intervened.
They were alone in the dark little bubble of ship that
Shapakti had made his home. The bulkheads shimmered with status reports
and images; one picture, a live one as far as Shan could tell, was of a
billowing Eqbas building that looked like a galleon on a stick. She
suspected it might be Shapakti's hometown. He was like anyone in
uniform, decorating his locker with comforting pictures of cherished
people and places.
History. You can't change a
thing now.
"What about the host?" Shan asked. "Selfish
preoccupation, but I need to know."
"As far as I can tell without using live specimens, the
hosts would revert to their original genome."
Now she didn't want the choice. Is
this me? Is this what I want? And why? And then she didn't know
if it was her opinion or if it was c'naatat
urging her.
If it was influencing her, it was sentient.
The panic that threatened to make itself obvious to
Shapakti felt as bad as stepping into space and feeling that total,
searing cold that felt white-hot. What was inside her? And if it wasn't
the parasite talking, what did she prize about being a host? She
started to face the possibility that she wasn't simply being good old
resilient Shan, always able to brace her shoulders and make the best of
a bad job. She had to consider that she might enjoy being as close to a
god as a pragmatic, disbelieving woman ever could.
She didn't have much time for gods. They were either
absent or incompetent. She wasn't sure if it was a good idea to get too
used to being one.
Then another sickening thought almost cut her legs from
under her.
She hadn't even thought about Aras.
"What's wrong?" asked Shapakti.
"Have you worked out if you can remove c'naatat
from a wess'har?"
"We don't yet know. It's possible."
"So… Aras could look forward to some sort of normal
life, then." She swallowed hard. It took all her conscious will not to
flood the room with the scent of her own anxiety. She lapsed into
detached language. "He could be free to reproduce."
"If the organism can be separated from him, yes."
You're looking for an excuse.
It was almost a disembodied voice in her head. For the
first time in her adult life, she didn't know exactly what she thought,
what she believed, and what she wanted. There were no absolutes and no
certainties.
Shapakti looked into her face, pupils snapping open and
closed. Even if he couldn't smell her it was obvious that he knew the
news had knocked her for six. "But you would like to go home, wouldn't
you? I would. I have been away a long time. I want to see my isan
and my house-brothers and our children
again. I thought you would too."
Shan thought of Reading Metro and the admin workload
and the gridlock riots and coming home to an empty apartment. Then she
thought of the Wessex National Park and fried egg sandwiches and how
large a plot of land her long-frozen pension would now buy.
"Who else knows about this?" she asked.
"My team, of course, and Esganikan--"
"Do me a favor. It's speculation as far as I'm
concerned. You don't tell Ade or Aras. Not yet. That's my job.
Understand?"
"Very well. But I thought this would please you."
She stood up and made for the hatch. "You've done a
good job. But it's a choice I didn't think I'd ever be able to make."
"I am sorry for angering you. But they say you are a
competent matriarch, able to make very hard decisions."
Shan stood on the threshold where coaming would have
been on a normal ship, and felt the sleet against her face softening
into snow.
"Well, they were wrong," she said.
I miss you. It's
very wonderful here, very strange, and there are so many different
types of people and plants that I sometimes forget myself and stop
missing you all for a moment. But when I close my eyes to rest, there
you are again. It's been too long. I will bring marvelous things back
for you. I will let you know as soon as I have a departure date, so you
can all plan a period in suspension. Thank you for waiting for me.
DA SHAPAKTI, to his isan Jamurian Ve,
his
house-brothers, and the beloved children of the clan
The snow was knee-deep. Wess'har didn't
like the cold but a few brave souls had ventured out into the fields,
swathed in layer upon layer of sek. Aras,
who didn't suffer in cold weather and had been raised in Baral, took it
in his stride. Shan could see him clearly through the scope of Ade's
rifle.
"I hope he doesn't get the wrong idea," said Ade,
taking the rifle back from her. "It isn't even loaded."
Shan sat on the top of the plateau next to her
memorial, arms around her knees, and savored the exceptionally rare
snowscape that ran across the ship camp of the Eqbas Vorhi mission to
the city itself. A layer of snow on top of the pearl made F'nar look
like a nostalgic window-dresser's rendering of a fairytale winter.
"What do you think of that, Ade?"
The growing Eqbas settlement, tucked discreetly into a
stone forest of volcanic plugs, had begun to remind Shan of a wasps'
nest. A slim base emerged from the ground and the structure was
beginning to flare out from it, reaching into the air like an oyster
mushroom just like the buildings of Surang. It was free of snow: they
must have been using some sort of environmental barrier, and it was
warm behind it, because tem flies had
already begun polishing it with a pretty layer of iridescent shit. They
swarmed to hot climates for the winter but some were still here and
seemed to have been caught unawares by the weather like everyone else.
Ade puffed little clouds of condensed breath. Shan
reminded herself to breathe again.
"Ade, have you thought about it?"
"I still think you should tell Aras right now."
"I asked if you had
thought about it."
"Yeah, I have."
"You could be back to normal and going home. Wife,
kids, the whole thing."
Ade had never been much good at hiding his feelings.
Now he wore his expression of suppressed disgust, lips clamped tight
and pupils wide. "How can you say that when you know what normal was
for me?" His automatic camou-flage jacket was now stark white with
faint swirls of pale gray and blue, merging him with his background
like an Arctic hare. He seemed perfectly adapted. So
this is what he really does. He's a mountain and arctic warfare expert.
"I didn't have a wife and kids and every woman I ever loved walked out
on me. I'm coming up forty and I've been kicked out of the Corps. So
everything I've got is here, even if they take every alien cell out of
me."
"I was just asking. I didn't want you to feel that you
didn't have a choice."
"You don't see yourself ever being my isan,
do you?"
It was odd to hear him use the wess'har term. "Ade, I
just thought it might all be a combination of a crush and loneliness on
your part."
"Oh, and there was I thinking you didn't feel sorry for
me."
"I thought you might see things differently if you
could go home. You don't have to stay. Take c'naatat
out and you could--"
"This is home."
"I'm sorry. I had to ask, just in case."
"Okay, do you want to have
c'naatat taken out? Do you want to be
regular Shan Frankland again?"
She'd asked herself that over and over again ever since
Shapakti had told her it was possible. The answer had been immediate: no.
It was a gut reaction. She still didn't know
if it was the parasite colony talking, making a desperate bid to stay
inside its host.
"No, I don't," she said. "And perhaps that's why I
should go back to being a basic human. There's nothing worse than a
bastard like me with a bit too much power. Maybe I need stopping right
now."
Ade shut his eyes for a moment and she thought he was
going to erupt. She knew he had been raised on violence and she knew it
was within him; but she didn't want to see it emerge, not because of
her and a few stupid comments.
But he simply opened his eyes again and gave her a
smile that was utterly heartbreaking. "That's why I think the world of
you. You're a fundamentally good person in a way almost nobody ever is.
You think I can just pack my bag and leave, do you?"
"Stop it, for Chrissakes." She squirmed. "I know
exactly what I am. Good doesn't come into it. You ought to bloody know,
too. You've got enough of my memory now."
"Being good isn't always about being soft."
Stop it. "Come on, you
miss Earth."
His lips compressed again. She wasn't getting anything
out of him. "We've all got responsibilities here, but I'll go along
with whatever decision you make. You're still the Boss."
"Great. Just great. That's
a big fucking help."
"You still have to tell Aras. Where does that leave
him?"
"Shapakti doesn't know if it'll work on wess'har. I
don't want to get his hopes up."
"And if they can, you think he'll want to breed more
than he wants you?"
"Possibly."
"You can't believe that. I've inherited some of his
thoughts. So have you."
"So let's see what he thinks when he's got all the
facts."
"He's going to go fucking ballistic when he finds out
you kept this from him. If you don't tell him, he's going to pick it up
from your memory sooner or later. I'd hate to find out that way. Tell
him before he takes Rayat and Lindsay back to Bezer'ej."
They went back to staring at the snow. Genies didn't
fit back into bottles easily. And she wasn't sure how she'd feel if
Aras was given the same choice and then took it.
She'd almost grown used to the status of an isan:
she liked being adored, even if she knew that it was as much a
biological mechanism as an emotional one.
C'naatat was showing her
all the things she really didn't like about herself.
She got up and they walked back down the easy path from
the plateau and down onto the plain again. Even 150 trillion miles from
home, snow had lost none of its clean, quiet wonder.
"Want to build a snowman?" Ade asked.
She smiled. He was his old self again, trying to raise
morale like a good sergeant should. "As long as we flatten it
afterwards. Nothing intrudes on the landscape, remember."
And they built a snowman, laughing and pelting each
other with hard-packed, vicious snowballs that almost burned when they
caught bare skin. Shan stuck a stylus in the expressionless face to
make a nose. There was never a carrot and a couple of pieces of coal
around when you needed them.
"I've never seen you laugh like that," said Ade.
"I've never built a snowman."
"No?"
"I didn't really have a childhood."
"I can tell. Me neither."
"Oh." She glanced over his shoulder and he turned to
see what she was looking at. "Shapakti."
The Eqbas scientist was walking unsteadily through the
snow, the swathe of fabric across his face reminding her of the cowl of
his biohaz suit. He made a few placatory bobs of his head and stopped
to do a head-tilting stare at the snowman.
"Is this religious?" he said.
"No, and don't even mention it to the colonists if you
meet them," Shan reached out and knocked the head off the figure,
embarrassed. Ade retrieved the stylus. "You've got some news for me,
haven't you?"
"I have something to show you--both of you. Somewhere
much warmer."
"Sounds good to me," said Ade.
Shapakti turned and began walking back towards F'nar.
Shan and Ade trampled the rest of the snowman back into featureless
oblivion before catching him up.
"Why did you traipse all the way out here to find me?"
she asked. "I've got a virin."
"You don't always answer," said Shapakti. "And I think
you like plenty of warning of my interruptions."
It was Ade's first visit to the underground bunkers
that housed F'nar's fighter craft and assorted weapons. He stopped to
admire a vessel, but Shan took his arm and dragged him gently away.
"You can play with that later." Shapakti led them through the maze of
passages and they came to an opening that spilled bright light in
exactly the same way that the subterranean colony of Constantine had
when she had first ventured down into its heart.
"This was taken from Umeh Station," said Shapakti, and
opened the hatch.
Hot moist air hit her face and she could taste
greenness and life on the oxygen-rich air.
Home, her body said. Home.
Maybe it wasn't Reading Metro, but it was Earth.
Rainforest vines and exotic greenery
filled the chamber like some Victorian hothouse that had been shipped
out to amuse an eccentric guest. Eddie was wandering about inside,
stroking his fingers over the shiny emerald leaves.
"You okay?" said Shan.
"I'm fine," he said.
"I'm sorry about Ual. I never had chance to meet him,
and I regret that."
"Yeah." He was subdued, not Normal Eddie at all. She
didn't plan to divert any time to soothing him right then. She had
enough on her plate as it was. "You can have your ballistic vest back
now."
Shapakti beckoned them further inside and dug both
hands into the ground, scooping up dark soil.
"This was the hardest part," he said. "We recreated
terrestrial soil and some bacteria. It is far from ideal but the plants
show every sign of surviving. They were grown in a fluid nutrient
solution in Umeh Station."
"You're a clever boy, Shapakti." Shan took off her
jacket. The air was tropically hot. "What now?"
"The gene bank," he said.
"What about it?"
"You said I might have access, with your supervision of
course. I would like to see what we can achieve."
Shapakti was quite literally harmless. She knew he
would do nothing to damage or exploit the contents of that precious
store. He was even planning to put extracted c'naatat
organisms back on Ouzhari; he was everything she could trust.
"Lovely," said Ade, closing his eyes and inhaling
deeply. "Bit too quiet though. Jungle's all noise. I've done jungle."
"I shall find a single species to resurrect," said
Shapakti. Shan thought it was a strange choice of words. "And its food
sources."
"Better make it a herbivore or something, then." It was
just a display of potted plants. It was quick familiarity when her
guard was battered and falling, not a mystic sign she should go home
again. "Want any help?"
"I would like access to databases on jungle."
"Umeh must have downloaded databanks, and if you ask
the UN nicely they might put you in touch with biologists…on Earth."
Shit, she nearly said back home. It was
getting too seductive. "Eddie's got a fair old library too, haven't
you?"
"I have," said Eddie. "You're welcome to what I've got.
And if you get through to the UN, they'll panic and wonder exactly
where you're planning to invade if you ask too many questions about
tropical environments. Try the Pacific Rim States. They think you're
the cavalry."
"Maybe they are," said Shan.
"Saddle up, then," said Eddie, and walked out through
the hatch.
Aras rested his head on his folded arms and
stared along the faint grain of the table. He thought of the bezeri and
wondered how much longer he could delay giving them his decision.
His duty was to go to them and help, but his wess'har
instinct said his isan came first. What
was it like to live under water, anyway? What could he give the bezeri,
other than reassurance and an extra hand?
It was unthinkable to refuse them, and unthinkable to
leave Shan even if Ade would be there to care for her.
I want my isan. I
want Shan. I waited so long for this.
The door opened and he sat up sharply. Shan and Ade
walked in, dripping slush from their boots and flushed from the walk in
the cold air.
"Shapakti's built a rain forest," said Shan. "He's a
clever little bugger." She paused. "What's wrong?"
"You startled me," said Aras. "I was thinking."
Ade went to boil water for tea. "Shan's got some news
for you." He shot her a glance and she glared back at him. "Go on. Tell
him."
She was suddenly angry: Aras could see that from her
dilated pupils. She sighed air from her nose, irritated, and Ade
suddenly smelled of anxiety. She wasn't happy about what he'd said.
"Okay, I'll apologize before I start," she said, and
sat down at the table without removing her jacket. "Ade says Ishould
have told you a few days ago. He's right. But I still don't have all
the facts."
Aras waited.
"It's c'naatat," she said
at last. "Shapakti thinks it can be removed from the host organism."
Aras stopped his thoughts racing ahead. He had heard
this before, many years ago, when wess'har had found out what c'naatat
was and that it did more than
accelerate recovery. They thought they could stop it. And they had been
wrong.
"Has he tested this theory?"
Shan scratched her forehead, looking down at the
table's surface for a few moments. "He's separated it from a sample of
my tissue."
"Ah."
"Go on. I know what you're going to ask."
"No need. I haven't given him a sample of my
tissue. So he can't prove the same claim for
the wess'har genome."
"I know. Are you going to give him a specimen?"
"Why should I?"
"It would solve the problem of accidental contamination
if removal was possible."
"No," said Aras. "That's not what you mean at all.
Don't lie to me. I told you once that you were a very poor liar, isan,
and you have still learned nothing of the
skill."
She sat looking at him and then got up and put her arms
around him from behind. "It might be possible." She laid her cheek
against his. He reached up and clasped her arms, thinking he might push
her away rather than embrace her. "It's not definite, not by a long
chalk. But I had to tell you."
"Why?"
She hesitated. He still couldn't smell any scent at all
beyond her skin, sweet wood overlaid with female musk. "Because I want
to know what you really want."
He could measure the time that he had wanted to be a
normal wess'har again in centuries. The
thought had obsessed him for years, so many years that it was
impossible to explain to any other being--even Shan--just how
overwhelming and intense and sustained
that emotion was. He thought he wanted to be a father more than
anything he could imagine.
And then he met Shan: and he made a rash, split-second
choice to save her life and the agony of not fulfilling his instinctive
biological purpose had eased so much that it was merely occasional
pain, and one that he could brush aside by being with her.
Now he had a house-brother too, more or less. And they
might learn to be content, and it didn't really matter that he had no
children.
"Do you want to go home?" he asked. "Earth?"
Still no scent. She was sparing his feelings. "For the
first time in my life, I have no idea what I think."
"You could go home. So could Ade."
"And you might have children. You can never have them
with me, with or without c'naatat. That's
one never we're certain about. If I stay a
carrier, there can't be more of us. If I revert to normal, we can't
reproduce anyway."
Aras knew exactly what he wanted. He didn't dare say so
and influence her. He hadn't given her a choice about c'naatat,
and she hadn't given Ade one either.
They weren't bound by any obligation at all. But he had no right to
think about his own happiness when the bezeri were still waiting for
him to help them.
"I would very much want you to be happy," he said, and
tried to keep his grip on her forearms neutral, neither letting go--a
sure sign he was upset at the idea--or by gripping harder, and making
it
clear he didn't want her to leave.
"As long as I'm c'naatat,
I'm staying here," she said. "I can never go home as long as I'm a
biohazard, whatever countermeasures Shapakti thinks they can create."
She's going to leave me.
"You must make your own choice," said Aras. "It's too
important for me to influence you and Ade either way."
She can go back to Earth as a
normal woman and do what she planned to. She can have Ade and she can
have her patch of land, and she can put the last few years behind her.
I took that away from her once.
"You think about it," she said, and kissed the top of
his head. "There's plenty of time."
No, for once she was wrong. Time had suddenly run out.
FROM:
Esganikan Gai, Eqbas Vorhi fleet
TO:
Marie-Claude Garces, Secretary General of the United Nations
We have been
made aware that the order to use persistent toxins on Bezer'ej was
given by senior ministers and intelligence officers of the Federal
European Union. Under your own laws, these individuals are war
criminals and so we hold you to the obligation to arrest and punish
them for their acts of genocide and environmental destruction. Anyone
able to detain them must do so. If no action is taken, we willfind out
who did not act, and when we reach Earth we will hold all of them
responsible for failing to take the appropriate measures of a civilized
society.
The atmosphere over lunch was tense. Shan
had always been one to speak her mind, but she wasn't forthright now.
She sat tapping her glass spoon against the bottom of the bowl.
Aras watched her discreetly from his peripheral vision.
Ade wouldn't meet her eyes either. Eventually she got up and washed the
bowl and spoon before pulling on her jacket.
"I'm going for a walk," she said, and didn't wait for a
response.
The door closed. Ade counted visibly to ten, the time
it took for her to stride out of earshot. The crunch of her boots faded.
"Aras, I swear to God, I'm not pressuring her."
Aras believed him. His face was pure distress. "You
don't believe in God."
"Look, I'll go. I can't do this."
"You will sit quietly and listen
to me."
Ade's shoulders braced almost imperceptibly. He was
still instinctively ready to defend himself. "What do you want, Aras?"
"I want to see Shan content. She can't be content if
she feels pulled by conflicting duties." He was clear now. It would be
agony but it needed to be done, and the sooner the better. "I'll tell
you something now that you must not tell
her."
"Whoa, no--"
"She'll find out, but I want that to be after she can
no longer act on the information."
"You can't lie to her."
"Oh, I've learned some useful human skills. I can lie
by omission, and I can lie by false statements. I'm almost a competent
human."
"I'm not promising anything."
"I'll hunt you down if you distress her by revealing
this."
"Mate, I've been threatened and beaten until I pissed
my pants. You think you can do any better at scaring me than my dad
did?"
"Listen."
Aras got up and walked round behind Ade, grabbing him
by the shoulders. It was just to make him stay sitting, to make him
listen; but Ade threw off the grip and wheeled round on Aras, sending
the bench flying, and slammed him against the nearest wall. He was
astonishingly strong for his height. Aras stared down at him, shocked
by the instant white-faced anger he was looking at.
"Don't ever fucking touch
me like that, okay? Ever." Ade's face
flushed. He let go of Aras's tunic and stepped back. "Just don't." His
voice trailed off. He righted the bench again to sit and focus on his
bowl of stew.
"I'm sorry," said Aras. There were things he didn't
know about Ade at all and could only guess. He certainly knew about his
violent father, and his shame for leaving his mother undefended as soon
as he was old enough to join the marines. The old emotions seemed very
near the surface. "I have to tell you this. The bezeri have asked me to
live among them. I know Shan could go home as a normal human being and
that you would look after her. If I choose to do what I ought for the
bezeri, then she needn't feel she has to stay for my sake."
Ade looked up from the bowl and his mouth really was
slightly open. Aras wondered why shock did that to humans. It was as if
they were trying to taste the air because they didn't trust their
hearing. "That would destroy her," Ade said quietly. "How can you even
think of doing that? She loves you."
"And I love her, and that's the normal wess'har way,
but Shapakti has changed that. I feared she would prefer you to me, as
her own kind. Now I wish she would."
Ade lowered his head a little. His eyes were closed. "I'm the
interloper. You can't do this because of me. And it's just a
theory--"
"I've made up my mind."
"You're wrong. You're so
wrong."
"I plan to take Rayat and Neville to the bezeri, as
they asked, so that they can deal with them. And I'll stay. I want you
to promise me that you'll explain to her why I did this and then take
proper care of her while she adjusts."
"The fuck I will." Ade's voice sounded as if he had
swallowed something uncomfortably hot. "Adjust?
I know she doesn't look like the emotional type, but you'll hurt her.
It'll rip the guts out of her."
"And maybe that's what it will take." Ade went to
protest again, but Aras held up both hands. "You can't prevent this."
Ade didn't speak again. Aras began imagining how he
might adjust to a life alone again, and in an environment more alien
than he had ever known, but he knew he could
adapt. He would cope.
The one thing he would never be able to cope with,
though, was not being able to take his leave of Shan properly, and
explain himself. He would walk out of her life with every indication
that he would return again, and it would be the hardest thing he had
ever done.
But he could lie now.
Mar'an'cas had taken on a distinctly purposeful
air in the last week. Lindsay walked through the camp trying not to
stare through open tent flaps, but she wanted to see what was happening.
Yes, the colonists knew they were going home. For all
the privation and tragedy that they had been through in the past few
months they seemed uplifted, and as much as the word nauseated her it
was the only one that fitted their collective mood.
And it was nearly Christmas.
Christmas was one of those public holidays like Eid,
Solstice, Hanukah and Diwali that had once interrupted her planning
schedule because staff went on leave. That was all. Seeing it marked
now by Christians who genuinely believed it was spiritually significant
was both moving and frightening. And it still left her feeling like an
alien.
Inside every tent was a light of some kind: a candle, a
solar lamp, anything that created fire. In the charcoal gloom of an
early northern winter, it looked reassuring and magical.
When she passed Deborah Garrod's tent she glanced away
but the woman called to her.
"Lin," she called. "Lin, come in and have a drink. You
must be frozen."
Deborah was simply a kind woman. She'd helped her
through David's birth and she'd been there in the infirmary when he
died. She knew what it was to lose someone she loved, too. Lindsay
paused, then ducked into the tent.
"How have you been?" asked Deborah.
"I think you know."
Lindsay sipped the tea she offered. Its taste was
irrelevant: it was hot, and that was wonderful. She felt like a fool
because everyone knew she had tried to drown herself and that she had
failed as surely as she had failed at everything else.
At least Deborah wouldn't ask her where she was
planning to spend Christmas this year.
"You've had a terrible time, Lin."
"So have the bezeri."
"You didn't know."
"It was a bomb. I know what bombs do. The rest was
detail."
"I understand a little of what you're going through.
However awful it seems, there really is purpose, but you have to look
at it from some distance to understand it."
"And God's the distance, right?"
"What do you think?"
"I think I've helped kill tens of thousands of sentient
beings and focused the attention of an alien war fleet on Earth. If
I've missed anything out, let me know."
"The bezeri have asked for you and Rayat to be handed
over to them."
"I--I didn't know that. I thought they might as soon as
I knew some had survived."
I'll drown anyway, then, or the
pathogen will get me. Unless I ask the unaskable. What have I got to
lose?
They went on drinking tea. Rachel, far more sober as a
six-year-old than she had been at five, slipped into the tent with a
battered handful of foliage.
"Decorations," she said quietly. She held them up on
tiptoe, trying them against the ridge of the tent, and then dropped
them in Deborah's lap. "We're going back to Earth, aren't we?"
"Yes, you are." Lindsay held out her arms to her and
the child hesitated for a moment and looked to Deborah for approval
before scrambling on to her lap. "You'll like it."
"You're not like Shan."
"Absolutely." As if she needed reminding. Shan never
got in over her head or did anything without covering all the angles.
Emotions never tore her apart. Lindsay struggled to put aside her fear
and forced a smile. "What do you want for Christmas, then?"
"I want Daddy to come home," she said. "Or Aras."
Kids had a stunning sense of proportion. Deborah said
nothing. She fidgeted on Lindsay's lap and finally wriggled to the
floor and skipped out again.
"That's what makes it hard," said Deborah.
Just being with Deborah was soothing in its way.
Deborah didn't berate her or remind her of her failings. She just sat
there and drank tea with her.
"What do you want?" she
asked.
"To make things a little better. Perhaps I got my
punishment before I committed my crime, by losing David, but it doesn't
feel like that."
"If you won't ask God what's required of you, then you
might ask the bezeri."
Lindsay gazed into the cup and realized she had been
told something profound. Lancing this boil of misery would take more
than just dying. She needed to hear what her victims thought of her.
And maybe she could find a way to help the survivors.
Be certain you don't just want
to stay alive at any cost.
Bezeri had faces. She knew that: they had eyes, like
terrestrial cephalopods. All she had to do was to somehow look into
them. But that meeting was a world away.
The wess'har would be coming for her. They would send
Aras, as they always did, because the bezeri knew him and spoke to him.
She would ask him, and hope that he understood that she wanted to share
c'naatat not because she was afraid to die
but because she was afraid for the first time that death would not be
the end.
"I'd like to pray," said Lindsay, and could hardly
believe her own words. And they were utterly sincere. "Please, Deborah,
help me out here. It's hard for a mass murderer to know where to start."
The snow had stopped and the novelty had worn
off even for the hardiest of F'nar's citizens. There was nobody out on
the terraces tonight: lights shone from irregular, wound-like windows
across the span of the caldera. It was really pretty. Ade liked it here.
He waited for a few moments before opening the door,
listening carefully in case he interrupted a difficult moment. But Shan
was sitting on that blue sofa that didn't fit in with any of the
wess'har furniture, one leg tucked beneath her, head propped on her
hand while she watched the shifting pattern of the screen on the wall.
"It's a brawl at the UN tonight," she said, not looking
at him. "I'm waiting to see the African Assembly bloke slug the FEU
delegate. He's close. I think he's got the form to take him. About five
kilos, I'd say."
A humorous Shan was a nervous and unhappy Shan
whistling in the dark. Ade slid off his jacket and fired up the range
to reheat the stew. The white glass slab radiated heat immediately.
"Where's Aras?"
"Talking to Shapakti before they deliver the prisoners
to Bezer'ej."
"Did you have a fight?"
"No. He just seems very subdued." She switched off the
screen. "I've tried convincing him none of this is going to change
things. He'll come round."
Ade sat down next to her and offered his shoulder. She
yielded slightly and settled into him almost as if they were already
lovers rather than simply circling each other, nervous of the final
step. There was nothing he could do. He wanted to blurt out everything,
but she'd go storming after Aras and then there would be continual
arguments. He didn't want that.
Besides, Ade had made up his own mind.
Earth didn't beckon him half as much as wanting to be
with Shan and Aras. He felt a kinship now with the wess'har that was as
strong as the sense of family in the Corps, and it wasn't just his
burgeoning wess'har genes that were anchoring him. Aras was a soldier,
an abandoned soldier, a man who knew what
duty meant and what it was to be expendable.
And Ade knew he was in the way. And he didn't deserve
any happiness, not after helping Lindsay destroy Ouzhari. It was time
he paid for all the people he'd let down in his life-- his mum, Dave
Pharoah, and the bezeri.
"You really made this sofa?" he said, struggling to
stay off the subject.
"Yeah." She looked into his face. "What color is it?"
"Blue," he said.
She managed a grin. "Wess'har vision."
"It's incongruous. But comfortable."
"Yeah, that's a good word. Incongruous."
He checked himself. It wasn't a word he'd used before.
He wasn't stupid, but he didn't use words for a living like Eddie did,
and he wasn't as intelligent as Shan. He realized c'naatat
was changing him in more subtle ways than he imagined.
"I'm going to go with Aras and hand over Lin and Rayat.
I'm the one who took the bloody bombs there so--"
"I really don't need this now. Not again, Ade."
"I knew they stood a chance of getting used. So I'm
guilty."
"Motive doesn't matter here. Just outcomes. How many
times do we have to go over this?"
"So what about inept criminals?" he asked. "You try to
be a murderer or a rapist or a thief or something, but you just can't
manage the job. Does that make you innocent?"
Shan was silent. Then she made a slight uff
noise that could have been a laugh or an
expression of contempt.
"I'm buggered if I can answer that."
She fell silent again and he could see her jaw muscles
working, her eyes slightly defocused. God, he'd stunned her with
something clever. He reveled in the
moment, not because he'd beaten her at something but because he had
surfaced briefly in her intellectual league, and he wondered if she
might love him for that. It was rare common ground, more heady than the
one-of-the-lads feeling of both being in uniform. But now winning her
affection didn't matter. He couldn't stay and prompt Aras into leaving.
He needed to stop her feeling obligated to him.
She shook her head at last. "No, you've got me there.
That's quite a question. Do you have an answer?"
"It still makes you guilty, because one day you might
try it again and succeed. It's about… potential."
She turned her head slowly. "You do the simple soldier
routine perfectly, but you're fucking smart, aren't you?"
"No. Not at all."
"Well, Hawking, wrap your IQ round this. What's the
right thing I need to do for Aras? And you?"
"What about you?"
"I'll cope with whatever comes down the road. You know
me."
Ade had managed brief excursions into Shan's mind since
his infection and what he saw was the headlines, the big events that
wouldn't leave her alone. But every day he saw new facets and they were
much more emotional than people imagined.
He wondered when the memory of being spaced might
surface in him. She'd bitten him and drawn blood: he expected it to
well up any day now, and the prospect scared him.
He shared a plate of netun
with her and respected the silence. With or without c'naatat,
he loved her. Restored to normality,
he wouldn't care about her any less than he had when he'd first seen
her swing through that hatch, reassuring and in command, or when she'd
treated him like a hero even though he crapped himself, or when she put
his medals back in his pocket. He wondered what life might be like back
on predictable Earth as a clever woman's bit of rough. It would be an
Earth where they'd both be as alien as the Eqbas.
And he wondered what Aras might feel like as one of
those weirdly likeable sea horses again, with none of the human genes
that had made him what he was now. Maybe Aras wouldn't miss him and
Shan at all: and maybe he would be devastated beyond Ade's capacity to
imagine.
It was all a matter of what was right. Ade had a better
idea of that now.
He'd spare her the explanation. He was never her real jurej,
after all.
Let others praise
ancient times; I am glad I was born in these.
OVID
"Oh," said Shan. "Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh."
Two macaws fluttered among the vines, turquoise and
saffron, looking like they weren't quite getting the hang of being
macaws. Their colors were impossibly bright and she had only ever seen
them on natural history programs, but they were as real as macaws could
ever be.
"Now that's a miracle,"
she said.
"I knew they would delight you." Shapakti had the same
air of embarrassed pride that Aras had displayed when he had first
shown her F'nar. There was something fundamental in the wess'har male
that needed to please a female. "They are
perfectly beautiful beings, aren't they?"
Shan craned her neck. "It's one thing to recreate an
arrangement of cells," she said. "But making it into a parrot that
knows how to fly and be a parrot is something else entirely." One of
the macaws made a crash landing on a branch and flapped, all screeching
panic. "Well, more or less."
"We found a great deal of data on macaws. We recreated
a virtual environment for them while we accelerated their growth."
"Instant parrot. I should hate this, but for some
reason I can't."
"A word of caution, chail.
Doing the same with each species in the gene bank will take a lifetime
and more. This isn't Earth. There is no ecosystem for them to slot into
and learn to be what they are."
"But the gene bank you take back to Earth will fit
right in,won't it?" She wanted Ade and Aras to see this. They would
love it. It was her first thought and then her second was that she
still didn't know what was the right thing to do for Aras. It took the
shine off a moment of pure wonder. "Even extinct species usually have a
niche to fit into on Earth and close relatives that can socialize them."
"I believe you were right to insist on retaining a
separate gene bank as--what is the word?"
"Insurance."
"Yes, insurance." He
clasped his long hands in front of him and wafted a scent of pure
contentment. He was good at his job and he knew it. "And they speak."
"Parrots? Yes, they really can talk. Took us a while to
realize that, and we didn't treat them any better for it, but yes, they
can use language."
"An Earth without humans."
"What brought that on?"
"You said it a number of times, as did Aras."
"I just don't like people much."
"But we are having talks with people just like you,
humans who are not gethes. Does that not
give you satisfaction?"
So the Australasians had the sense to front up some
vegan or environmentalist liaison. That was smart. "Only if I can shoot
the rest."
"Human life is worth less to you than the lives of any
other species."
"I'm a copper. You get that way after a few years."
"You have no more laws to enforce. How much longer will
you insist on being a copper?"
"God, you do sound like Aras sometimes."
"Have you made your decision?"
The macaws shrieked and settled down to groom each
other's plumage. It was hard to look at those exquisite birds and not
believe there was something wonderful to look forward to, an
extraordinary future for the planet she once saw as the entire universe.
Fast forward, she
thought: I'm back on Earth, all nice and cozy with Ade, and
I'm part of the new world order,
really putting into action all the things I truly believe in. It's
everything I thought I wanted. And then one night and look up at the
sky and I know Aras is out there, 150 trillion miles away. I know what
he'll be thinking. I know how he feels. I know exactly what he's
experienced, right up to the last time I slept with him.
"How are you getting on with separating c'naatat
from wess'har tissue?" asked Shan.
"I am beginning to think it is impossible," said
Shapakti. "Each time I achieve separation, c'naatat
survives but the host cells die. I will persist."
"Oh." Will I remember him? If
they take away c'naatat, will I really
think about him the way I do now? "Not looking good, is it?"
Shapakti held out his arms like a scarecrow and the
macaws flew to him.
"They think you're their mum," said Shan. "You'll have
a hard job returning them to the wild." Just like
me.
"We will enable them to have a normal life somehow."
Shapakti ran a cautious finger over one macaw's head. Both birds were
jostling for position on his arm, feathers rustling. One caught his
finger in its beak, more playful than aggressive, but Shan braced
herself for a scream anyway.
"Uk'alin'i che," said the
macaw, very clearly, and they both took off for the vines again. Feed
me. It was a regular Eqbas parrot, all
right.
Shan sat cross-legged and watched the macaws until she
smelled sandalwood overlaid with a little acid and Aras entered. He had
something in his hands, wrapped in a piece of fabric.
"For me?" She attempted a reassuring smile.
He sat down beside her and placed the object in her
hands. "The bezeri asked me to return this."
She could tell what it was even without unwrapping it.
The weight and shape were familiar. When she peeled back the fabric the
azin shell map was exactly as she
remembered it, a beautiful piece of sand art. And she knew it wasn't a
present. She turned it over in her hands and remembered how strongly
she'd felt she could honor her pledge to protect them.
"I can guess," she said, crushed, and wrapped it again.
Aras seemed to have developed Ade's habit of
compressing his lips briefly before saying something difficult. "They
said to tell you that your red line did not hold."
She'd promised them. She'd failed. "Is
that what's been upsetting you? Why didn't you say?"
Shapakti busied himself talking to the macaws. Aras
seemed distracted by them for a moment, his head tilted in curiosity.
Then he turned his head very deliberately to her. "I thought it might
upset you."
"I've got a thicker hide than Eddie, and that's saying
something," she said, and grinned. Maybe he'd be happier now that she'd
shown that she wasn't hurt by the bezeri's rebuke. By the time he found
out it was a front, she would be comfortable with it.
He reached out and slid his hand into hers, almost
edging his way as if she might round on him and hit him. She caught his
hand tightly. Now was as bad a time as any to tell him.
"Shapakti says they still can't remove c'naatat
from you."
He let out a breath, nothing more.
"It's okay, sweetheart," she said. "It doesn't change a
thing."
Aras couldn't suppress his scent like she could. But
smelling that acid-citrus fragrance didn't tell her why he was upset.
It could have been that he really wanted to be normal again more than
he wanted to be with her. If he did, she would have to accept that.
They were both aliens: it was an unlikely relationship born of
desperation. If it wasn't that, then she could only assume that he
feared she would take her opportunity to reverse events and go home.
She was, as she had been for days, torn between the life she had here
and her duty to Earth. EnHaz, as brief a job as it had been, was where
her soul lay if she had one at all.
She got to her feet and he scrambled upright beside
her, but his eyes were on the macaws.
"This is the first time I feel that I've seen a real
part of Earth," he said. "Not a farm, like Constantine, for the benefit
of gethes alone. This is the Earth that is
quite separate from humans, isn't it?"
"Yes," she said. "And there's so little of it left."
"You miss it."
"Good God, no. Reading Metro wasn't unspoiled rain
forest. This is as new to me as it is to you."
"Eugenie Perault would be most surprised to see all
this return to its rightful home," said Aras.
"Surprised?" said Shan. "I'll fucking bet."
She thought it would be good to visit Earth some time
in the future, after the Eqbas had completed what they set out to do.
By then, she might be able to return home safely.
No, it was Earth now. Just
Earth.
Nevyan took Giyadas to see the growing Eqbas
settlement. It was twice the height of an adult wess'har now, still
looking ludicrously fragile but getting larger nevertheless. As Nevyan
watched, she could see the gradual accumulation of particles building
on the fresh edge of the construction as the nanites labored to their
template, taking the soil from around them and converting it into a
building. There was nobody around. The city worked alone.
"I don't like it," said Giyadas. "Does it have to be
here?"
"I don't like it either. But if they are to help us, we
must help them."
"We'll become like them."
"Not if we remain true to our principles." Nevyan had
her own doubts. She wanted to withdraw permission. She felt she
couldn't. "And they're not alien to us, not at heart."
"Are they building a city on Bezer'ej?"
It was a good question. The isanket
had a sharp mind and was already confident and aggressive, an
encouraging signfor her future. "If they build there,
then they have no need to be here."
It was an excellent idea. Nevyan turned and Giyadas
followed her back to F'nar.
This was why her ancestors had parted company with
Eqbas Vorhi. It was all too unnatural, too ambitious, too predicated
upon continual expansion--and in that sense, it made them no better
than
the isenj or the gethes. The Eqbas managed
environments without harm, but they were still spreading gradually
throughout the galaxy, imposing their order--the correct order, but
still imposed--on other worlds.
All I wanted was for the
gethes threat to be contained. And now we are the
latest outpost of Eqbas Vorhi.
She would suggest that they might be better occupied in
building a temporary city on Bezer'ej, where the cleansing work still
had to be done and the handful of bezeri survivors needed watching. If
Shan joined her, the suggestion would become a demand that Esganikan
couldn't ignore.
When Nevyan reached Shan's home, the woman was lying on
her back on the terrace, hands clasped on her chest, with something
over her face. It looked like a visor. Giyadas nudged her and she took
it off.
"Sorry," said Shan. "Look what Shapakti's rigged up for
me." She held the visor out to Giyadas and showed her how to place it
over her eyes. "He's modeled what they might be able to do with the
rain forests on Earth. He thinks they can be restored to at least their
2200 levels of coverage in five years. Isn't that amazing?"
Giyadas cocked her head back and forth rapidly,
trilling with excitement. "It's green," she said. "So much green. And
people!"
"Yeah, Shapakti likes his jungle," she said. "Gorillas.
He knows that makes me feel odd."
"Why?" Nevyan had never thought of Shan as looking
back. Now Earth had become something new and challenging for her. And
if Shapakti was right, then she had the option of going home, and that
was alarming.
"Long story. I saw a gorilla once and they'd taught it
to use sign language. I didn't know what it was saying, but later on I
found out, and it was asking me to help it get out of its cage." Shan
raked her fingers through her hair: it hung down her back again, like a
male's. Her c'naatat was reconstructing
her as fast as Shapakti was fashioning new rain forests. "There's never
a day goes by that I don't think about how it must have felt to see me
walk away, so now I don't pass gorillas on the other side of the road,
or bezeri, or cockroaches, or anything else that deserves the same
respect as us."
Nevyan understood the sentiment if not the specifics.
Shan was back in a world that had given her great torment and that she
seemed to feel she could put right if she had the chance. The Eqbas had
handed her a world of chances.
"You get on well with Shapakti."
"He's a decent bloke. We talk a lot about ecology, but
that's all, okay? They're calling it the Earth Adjustment Mission. I
love euphemism. I could watch it all day."
"That's still in the future. You know it will take
their fleet five years to reach us."
Shan inhaled and her pupils widened into those black
voids that showed stress in humans. "Hey, what is it?"
"You plan to leave," said Nevyan.
"No, I never said that at all."
"Eqbas has found ways and reasons for you to return to
your home. And you will leave."
Shan looked towards the door leading back into the
house as if she had heard something. She jerked her head back to look
at Nevyan and she was visibly angry, wafting jask,
but she lowered her voice. "I don't want to hear another word about it.
I know Aras thinks I'm going to leave him as well and this sort of
discussion doesn't help calm things down."
Nevyan knew she was outscented but that didn't stop her
asking. "Do you want to return?"
"Don't ask me."
"Does Ade?"
"Ask him." Shan took the
visor off Giyadas and the isanket made a
disappointed lrrrr. "I'm not done here
yet."
Nevyan's world was falling apart and she suspected that
Aras's was collapsing in the same way. It was obvious: Shan wanted to
go home. If I were marooned on Earth, I would
want to return to Wess'ej. It was natural. But Shan was her
friend, and she needed her counsel and her jask,
and Eqbas was taking her away from Wess'ej as surely as it was changing
the heart and soul of the planet. She couldn't help but resent it all.
"I won't discuss it, as you ask," said Nevyan. "But I
need your help in more immediate matters. I want to ask Esganikan to
move the settlement to Bezer'ej. I'm uncomfortable with their presence
here. The whole city is. There's too much change, too fast."
Shan stood with fists on hips and nodded. "Okay. But we
do this together, right? Because if I go down there and start a ruck
with her then I'll end up driving the bus back to Earth, and that's one
decision I don't want anyone making for me."
"Thank you."
"Where's Aras?"
"He's getting ready to take Lindsay and Rayat back to
the bezeri. I'll be bloody glad when that's over."
Nevyan held her hand out to Giyadas to take her home.
The isanket looked longingly at the visor.
"Can I see Earth?" she asked.
"One day, if you want to and Nevyan says you can," said
Shan, instantly uncomfortable. Her eye movement gave her away. "It's a
long time to be away from home, though."
"Do you like Ade more than Aras?"
"That's a very personal question."
"Ade's nice. Aras is nice."
"They're both nice."
"Aras can't go to Earth, can he?"
"True." Shan made a very definite move for the door. "Go and see
Shapakti and he'll show you the macaws and get them to talk
to you. They do talk, you know. Like we do."
Shan's finality always had the impact of a slap across
the face. You didn't question it, not even if you were senior matriarch
of F'nar.
"I'll meet you at the Eqbas camp after dinner," she
said. "I need a bit of quality time with my jurej've."
She was, at least, referring to them in the plural.
It wasn't Shan's problem any longer.
When everyone else was running away from a bad
situation, she would be the one running towards it. It was what coppers
did. That was what all professionals trained to deal with trouble
did--police, firefighters, soldiers. She was never sure if she had
learned to do it as a young probationer or if she had worked out from
an early age that she was the little adult who had to make order out of
the threatening chaos of her family. But whenever it began, her
instinct was now to go and confront problems and sort them before they
sorted her.
She lay on the bed, arms folded under her head, and
waited for Aras and Ade to come back from the Exchange of Surplus
Things. Ade was convinced he could make a barbecue. He was trying in
his solid, dependable, reassuringly ordinary way to get life back to
normal, to settle Aras down.
It's not even a decision. You
don't run.
The isenj and the wess'har had been enemies for
centuries, and the Eqbas had been imposing their sense of order on the
galaxy for far longer. Humans had just stepped into the noisy bar and
found the fight already in progress.
Walk around the block.
Her first sergeant, the only man who'd ever seen her
really cry, said fights burned themselves out if you let them run on a
little. If you piled in you could make them a lot worse. If you
couldn't suppress the fight with numbers, then sometimes sending in a
lone woman officer would do the trick and calm things down, because
blokes still had that primeval reluctance to hit a woman.
Not all of them, though.
Walk around the block again. Let
the fight sort itself out.
She heard the door open and sprang to her feet, not
caring if she looked anxious or even smelled it when she came out of
the bedroom. Aras had a bag of vegetables and Ade was carrying some
metal grids and a strange assortment of cannibalized pipes.
"Okay, we're going to have a barbie on the terrace,
complete with Eddie's shitty awful beer and a game or two of cards,"
said Ade. "Proper fun."
"I shall find this interesting," said Aras.
He wore a permanent scent of acid now. Shan made a
point of wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her head on his
chest. You're still mine. Don't worry. But
it didn't prompt his usual urrring and his
embrace was halfhearted.
There was the occasional metallic crash and swearing
from the terrace as the barbecue resisted Ade's attempts to build it.
Shan listened, expecting Aras to offer him a hand, but he ignored the
noise and seemed simply to tolerate her touch.
"I could still go with you," she said.
"I think it's my proper role to deliver the prisoners."
"This is a bit more protracted." She slipped her hands
inside his tunic and touched cool, suede-skinned muscle, hoping for
some response. "Once this is over and done with, we'll concentrate on
ourselves. You, me, Ade." The word Ade
just slipped out. But it still didn't feel right, as much as she wanted
it to. "I'm not on duty any more and neither are you after today. We
don't run the universe. It's some other bastard's shift."
"One day you'll hate me for keeping you here."
"Don't be bloody daft."
"You will. Your loyalty is your greatest weakness."
"And there was I thinking it was my sloppy emotional
personality."
"You think you're ruthless, but you care about some
things very much."
"Whatever you say, sweetheart." Don't
do this. Don't. "Are you sure you don't want a hand with Lin?
Rayat might cut up rough."
"I can manage. I have an Eqbas with me."
"Okay."
"I shall get it over with,
as you say." He looked at her swiss on the table. "May I take that?"
"Of course." She'd made him take it when he parted from
her on Bezer'ej, too. It was just a silly token. She wouldn't need it
anyway. "It's only waterproof down to two hundred meters."
"I shall take care of it."
"Okay, Ade might even have finished the bloody barbecue
by the time you get back." She hugged him. And now she would have to
say what she had never been able to tell him. "I know I never say it,
but you do know I love you, don't you?"
"Yes. I know. And I love you. And there is nothing
either of us can do about that even if we wanted to."
It was an odd thing to say, but wess'har were full of
strange comments and Aras had lost none of his wess'har idiosyncrasies.
He was feeling insecure. She had to sit tight and let him calm down.
She went out to the terrace to offer Ade a hand with
the barbecue, but he'd managed to get it standing on four legs.
"All we need now is fire," she said.
"I bet you say that to all the cavemen," said Ade, but
there was something very like anguish in his eyes, and he smelled of
acid. Aras's fears were clearly getting to him.
In its way the barbecue was a perfect image of their
situation, a rickety approximation of Earth trying to re-create the
familiar but failing. Ade succeeded in grilling evem
and although the beer couldn't get them drunk it was an echo of what
had been. But there was no raucous laughter or chatting, just Ade
glancing occasionally at Aras and trying to crack a joke, and Aras not
responding. Shan wondered if they ever argued in her absence.
She hadn't picked up anything from Aras's memories to
tell her if they had or not. She wondered what selection process c'naatat
went through in deciding which
recollections were sufficiently significant to bring to the front of
the file. She suspected it was only the big stuff, the hard-in-the-face
stuff, the images that plagued you like flash frames during the day and
were the last thing you saw and tried not to see before you fell asleep
at night.
But they'd work it out. Ade and Aras were both
sensible, get-on-with-it sort of blokes. They were just like her.
She sat down on the wall and put on the visor that
Shapakti had given her. She had seen enough of the city of pearl for
the day. She wanted to rest her eyes on green forests, on Earth.
It was home. Whatever she did, it would never stop
being home.
TO:
Esganikan Gai and Nevyan Tan Mestin
FROM:
Minister Par Shomen Eit, Northern Assembly
The death of our
respected colleague Par Paral Ual has been the cause of much strife and
debate in Ebj and the rest of Umeh. We now recognize that we are in
increasing need of outside assistance if we are to survive as a people
in the long-term. If you now wish to begin talks with us about
environmental recovery, we will guarantee your safety. If you can put
aside your policy of occupation, then we can make efforts to change our
cultural attitudes to population control. If we can achieve this, then
Minister Ual's vision and sacrifice will be vindicated.
Shapakti wasn't happy about the change of
plans, and it showed. Ade was new to this scent-signaling business, but
it was now as loud and clear as a shout.
"I do not have orders to
take you to Mar'an'cas," said Shapakti, standing at the main hatch of
his vessel like a bouncer blocking a nightclub door. "Or Bezer'ej. Just
Aras Sar Iussan and the prisoners."
"Think of me as the escort," said Ade.
"We are competent to do this alone."
"She was my commanding officer."
"That's irrelevant."
"Look, mate, I'm coming whether you like it or not."
Ade wasn't sure if Shapakti was still afraid of him. He thought the
rifle might have given him a clue. "I'm making sure Aras comes back
okay."
"He can't be harmed."
"Neither can I. So humor me."
Shapakti made a little sideways jiggling movement of
his head. Shan said that wess'har did that when they were annoyed.
"Very well. But you're lying."
I haven't exactly lied.
It had taken Ade a while to understand that wess'har couldn't actually
tell if humans were lying or not, only that they were upset or angry or
afraid or any one of a dozen states of mind that changed your body
chemistry. They were like old-fashioned polygraphs. They told each
other exactly what they thought, but when it came to humans they simply
used their scent skills and other senses to spot the emotion and then
worked out the detail from context. They were getting very good at it,
and he now had enough wess'har in him for his scent signals to be an
open book to Shapakti.
"I have my concerns," said Ade. "I want to see Aras
back safely."
And that wasn't a lie, either. It had been almost
impossible to walk away from Shan as if he was simply going for his
usual daily run, without a proper goodbye. Everything had been left
unsaid again: it was as if he had lost her a second time, except that
he knew she was safe and well. But he was quite literally the spare
prick at a wedding here. And he owed the bezeri some substantial act by
way of apology.
Shan would understand. She'd done exactly the same,
although in a more spectacular way. The right thing was frequently the
one that hurt most.
Aras arrived at Shapakti's ship and stared at Ade as if
that would be enough to send him packing. "Go home," he said, and
tapped the tilgir in his belt. "I need no
assistance. I can deal with this."
"I know," said Ade, thinking of the time they had
hunted down an isenj patrol on Bezer'ej. Wess'har had no Hague
Convention and they didn't take prisoners. "But I'm coming anyway."
Aras paused for five long seconds. Maybe he resented
being offered help; maybe he had plans for Lindsay or Rayat that he
thought Ade might resist. No, Ade was fine with whatever he wanted to
do. They'd asked for it.
And so had he.
"No interfering," said Aras. "And you'll return to Shan
and do as I asked."
It was an awkward, silent flight to Pajat. It would be
an even more challenging journey to Bezer'ej. Ade hoped Shan would
understand one day.
Eddie packed his grip. Giyadas watched him for
a while, subdued, playing with his editing screen and his handheld. He
hoped she hadn't been annoying the UN staff on the ITX again. He
couldn't imagine being annoyed if an alien called him for a chat; it
would always be a wondrous thing for him as long as he lived. He had
passed from amazement through familiarity and into a state of wonder
again.
"You're going home," she said.
"No, I'm going to visit Jejeno with the Eqbas, if
that's not an oxymoron." He'd explain that word to her later, if she
needed it. She probably didn't. "I thought about it, and then I knew I
had to stay here."
"You like us best."
"Yeah, I like you a lot. But that's not the whole
reason. I've got to stop going home at the end of the day and
pretending nothing is my fault."
"You confuse me."
Eddie closed the grip and tested it for weight. At
least Umeh Station had real toilets with seats. He loved the wess'har
but he hated their plumbing. "It's hard to explain, doll, but in my job
you say things and write things that change what happens, but when
those events turn nasty you never have to face the consequences. We go
home, we go down the pub, we start a new story the next day, and the
people we said those things about have to clear up the mess. So for
once I'm making sure that I face the consequences by not going home.
I've got as much to lose as you have now."
"And the Jejeno discussions will be a good story
anyway."
"I know what you are. You're my bloody conscience."
"Will you teach me to do what you do?"
"What I do isn't worth doing."
"I want to do what you do."
"When I start doing it right, maybe."
Giyadas unfurled the editing screen. "Look what I did,"
she said.
Eddie smiled indulgently and held out his hand for the
screen. She was a sweet, clever, funny little creature and he adored
her. She had probably tried to edit some shots together, so he prepared
himself to praise her lavishly for being a smart girl.
The smile evaporated on his face as he flattened the
screen on his lap. He was looking at the locked-off camera shot of the
BBChan foreign news desk, and it wasn't a freeze-frame. It was live.
"Giyadas, what have you done?" He turned over the
screen: the handheld interface was active. When he flipped it back
over, Mick was scrambling into his chair and looking pissed off.
"Eddie, for Chrissakes where have you been?
Come on. Can't wait all day."
Giyadas preened. "I told the United Nations gethes
that I was the next matriarch of F'nar
and that I would tell Nevyan how helpful the UN had been if she would
connect me to the BBChan."
"Eddie…" said Mick.
"Wait one."
"Please, teach me to do what you do," said Giyadas.
"Doll, you don't need to learn a thing." Tears pricked
his eyes. "You're a natural."
"I like this reporting."
"So do I, doll," said Eddie, renewed. "So do I."
FROM:
Esganikan Gai, Wess'ej Mission
TO:
Curas Ti, Matriarch, Surang
At the request of
Nevyan Tan Mestin and Shan Frankland, we are relocating our operations
to Bezer'ej. Our presence is inconsistent with the life-style that
Wess'ej has chosen. Out of respect for our kinship, and in the
knowledge that they need no guidance in maintaining ecological balance,
we have agreed to this request to withdraw. We will locate the new
temporary settlement on the site of the previous wess'har base on
Bezer'ej.
Lindsay Neville watched Aras walk down the
path between the rows of tents. Shan wasn't with him, but Ade was.
Aras had that slightly swaying, almost feminine stride
that she had noted in all the wess'har males she'd seen. Despite his
height and solid build, there was nothing brutish about him and she
felt no instinctive sense of panic, even though she knew that he was
coming to take her to the bezeri for execution.
"I thought Shan might come," said Lindsay.
"This is my task," said Aras. "The bezeri are still my
responsibility."
Ade stood beside him in silence, expression carefully
neutral. A stranger would never have guessed that he had ever been
under Lindsay's command. Aras had a pack over his shoulder and that big
agricultural knife, the tilgir, in his
belt.
"Where can I find Dr. Rayat? There's no point trying to
evade the inevitable."
"He's working on the crops."
Aras cocked his head and walked on with Ade through
Mar'an'cas camp, Lindsay following them. He stopped and turned.
"You are quite extraordinarily compliant creatures
sometimes," he said. "I genuinely thought I would have to subdue you."
"Like you said, there's nowhere to escape."
Aras said nothing and carried on through the camp until
they came to the fields. Rayat was spreading human manure from the
latrines. Lindsay was never sure if he took on the task to show how
tough he could be, or if he was just doing a job that needed doing. She
had never really reached the inner core of the man and she suspected
she never would. Like Shan, he had a talent for making her feel
inadequate.
He stopped and leaned on his shovel. "So this is it,
eh?"
Aras beckoned. "Yes. Please don't try to bargain with
me, because I am not open to negotiation."
Rayat glanced at Ade and his rifle, and then shrugged
and drove his shovel into the soil. "Okay. No point putting on my
Sunday best for this anyway."
The colonists didn't stop to see them go. They went
about their business: they weren't the kind of people to turn into a
mob watching the tumbrills passing. Lindsay caught the eye of someone
she had known well, Sabine Mesevy, the botanist from Thetis who
had joined the colony. And when she
got to the shore, Deborah Garrod was waiting alone by the glass raft
that had somehow attached itself to the pebbles like a perfect jetty
reaching out into the shallows.
Eddie hadn't made contact since Umeh Station. Lindsay
had been so sure that he would. She was hurt: she wanted a goodbye,
even a forced one.
Deborah acknowledged Aras with a nod, then put her arms
around Lindsay and hugged her.
"It'll be okay," she said. "It passes."
She didn't hug Rayat, but then that wasn't surprising.
Lindsay had never been so scared in her life: from her
stomach to the core of her thigh muscles she felt cold and a sensation
of pressure squeezed against the roof of her mouth. There was something
in the brain that assessed threat far more accurately than the
conscious mind, and this time her brain said this
is really it, sweetheart. All the other times she had been
scared for her life--and there had been a few of those--it hadn't felt
like this, not at all. This was numbing, cold and completely disabling.
But if Shan could go with dignity, and Rayat too, then so would she.
She needed to pick her moment to ask Aras for the favor
that she suspected he would never grant.
She stepped onto the glass deck and wished she had been
able to examine this engineering miracle when she didn't have dying to
worry about.
The part-formed matrix of the Eqbas city stood
frozen in time.
It was neither growing nor deconstructing itself.
Nevyan walked ahead of Shan and Esganikan and stopped a few meters
short of it. It still stood twice her height, a pearl-covered mass of
swirls and billows that reminded her of the tree-sized fungi on
Bezer'ej. The air around it was warm and pleasant: tem
flies, caught out of season behind the biobarrier, went about their
business of laying down more nacre on the smooth surfaces.
"I thought you were going to remove this," said Shan.
Esganikan tilted her head this way and that. "There is
no core within this shell. Our materials have been deconstructed and
returned to the soil. This is purely the tem
deposits, and we will retrieve the remaining flies and release them
further south where the climate suits them. And then we can remove the
biobarrier."
Nevyan turned to watch Shan and the Eqbas commander,
feeling excluded from the debate. She could always tell--as could any
wess'har--when two matriarchs particularly liked each other, and for
all
the jask that had been emitted, Shan and
Esganikan did appear to be becoming comfortable together. Nevyan
imagined it was as much the shared experience of unnatural isolation as
it was the kinship of dominance. A return to Earth with a powerful new
ally seemed a prospect guaranteed to test Shan's resolve to stay.
"Okay, let's get these little buggers packed," said
Shan.
One of Shapakti's team placed a small square container
inside the biobarrier and within moments the tem
flies began struggling against an invisible force that was sucking them
into it. Then the biobarrier dissolved with a breath of warm air that
escaped into the winter chill of the plain, and only the thin shell of
pearl remained.
"Now, isn't that pretty?" Shan stepped forward and put
her hand out carefully, brushing her fingertips against the rippled
iridescence. Nevyan could see it was the lightest of touches, but the
shell cracked, and Shan stepped back with a small sound of surprise and
disappointment.
The pearl bubble began breaking up.
Shards shimmered to the ground from the uppermost level
and large cracks appeared at the bottom. The collapse picked up pace
and the three matriarchs stood back and watched as the structure
reduced itself to a heap of fragments.
Esganikan didn't react at all. Shan seemed upset.
"I hate physical metaphor," she said.
"It's just tem droppings,"
said Nevyan. "There is no such thing as prophecy."
Esganikan left without a word. She and her people were
free to visit Wess'ej any time, but Nevyan had the impression that they
would now keep at arm's length, to use
Eddie's grossly inaccurate phrase. The Eqbas matriarch was about twenty
meters away when she paused and looked back at them.
"Shan Chail, I have no
doubt that we will talk again, next time on Bezer'ej," she called.
"I'd like to do that," Shan called back, and Nevyan
wasn't sure if it was a statement of intent or a display of human
diplomacy.
Nevyan kept her thoughts about the nature of prophecy
to herself. It was a silly gethes thing,
this superstition business. The pearl shell had been an unstable
structure made of tem excrement, a thing
doomed to temporary existence from the start.
No, she would not be swayed by it. She hoped Shan could
ignore it too.
Aras had grown used to bezeri vessels over the
centuries but he decided he preferred the niluy-ghur.
However many times he submerged in the water-filled bezeri pod ships
and felt the sea flood his mouth and lungs, he had never grown used to
it.
It couldn't kill him. He had first found that he
couldn't drown when he was a prisoner of the isenj.
"Do you know what they're going to do to us?" asked
Rayat. He was sitting on the transparent deck, hands flat out behind
him almost as if he was trying to look relaxed, but it wasn't working,
not if you could smell a gethes' fear. Ade
was kneeling down on one knee next to Rayat, rifle across one thigh,
and Lindsay Neville stood with one hand on the column that housed the
steering mechanisms. She, at least, was looking down into the water
with some interest. She had been a naval officer. Perhaps she didn't
fear the sea as much as a land-based civilian.
"What would you do to someone who had caused the death
of most of your race?" asked Aras.
It wasn't a rhetorical question, although he knew how
to frame those. He wanted to know. He had little time left to find out
what humans might do in certain circumstances.
"There's only so much you can do to someone before they
die," said Rayat, and sounded as if he knew that for all the worst
possible reasons.
Aras sat on the edge of the deck and lowered the signal
lamp over the sea to summon the bezeri. It was a dull day and he would
be able to see their bioluminescence easily when they rose nearer to
the surface.
If only he had been able to tell Shan what he intended
to do; but he was adept at dishonesty now. She would have tried to stop
him. She had been sent here on the basis of Perault's lie to begin
with, and then he had made her exile permanent with another lie, by not
telling her immediately what he had done to save her life. When he
looked back, it seemed he had lied to her a great deal, just like
everyone else had.
He distracted himself with Rayat's question. "It will
be relatively rapid. You'll drown before you suffer. Bezeri have
cutting mouth parts but they have no weapons, and they're not as
creatively cruel as your own kind." He paused. "You're dead already,
though. The human-specific pathogen entered your lungs as soon as you
landed."
"You could have left us on the shore, then," said Rayat.
"This will be much quicker. It's also what the bezeri
want."
"So who's going to help them now?" asked Lindsay.
"I am," said Aras.
"No, I mean who will be based here now that your people
have withdrawn."
"Me. I'm going below to help them begin the rebuilding.
I owe it to them."
Shan would be furious, devastated, but she would get
over it. Ade would help her.
"What about Shan? I thought--"
"You thought wrong."
Lindsay seemed shocked into silence. Even Rayat smelled
startled. Aras concentrated on not looking at Ade.
"What if I did it?" said Lindsay at last. "What if I
went in your place?"
Rayat and Ade both reacted at once. "The fuck you are,"
said Ade suddenly. "If anyone's going down there, it's me. Is this some
stunt to get the parasite? Did this bastard put you up to it?" He
shoved Rayat in the chest. "Did he?"
Rayat still appeared genuinely surprised. He certainly
smelled stressed, then scared. "I never--"
"I thought of it myself," said Lindsay. "I'll do it. If
you infect me, then I'll serve them--if they'll let me."
Ade stood up and took his rifle off his webbing. "Right. So I just
stroll away from all this? Not me, mate." His face
was suddenly pale and he smelled as alarmed as Rayat. "Shan said all
she had to do was breathe in the water and stop panicking. I reckon I
can manage that."
"You have no idea what you're taking on."
"I never do. But I do it, anyway. I front up and earn
it. I don't know any other way."
Aras took it as an impulsive gesture by a fundamentally
good man confronted with an unpleasant reality. But now he realized why
Ade had insisted on coming. He had arrived at the same conclusion as
Aras. He had looked at the messy, painful reality of guilt and the
choices that were now open again and had made the same decision as he
had.
Aras pushed him gently away. "I want you and Shan to
regain the lives you had when you first landed on Bezer'ej."
"That's not going to happen." Ade stepped closer again,
face-to-face with him now: the prisoners were forgotten for the moment.
"You're not just staying here--you're planning to live
under water. You thought about that, have you? So have I. It's
going to be fucking awful and you haven't done a thing to deserve that.
There's no way I'm leaving you down there, and there's no way you're
abandoning Shan."
Ade started taking off his jacket, the one that changed
color according to his environment. As it fell on the glass deck it
made an attempt to become gray-blue and mimic the ocean beneath.
Lindsay, a tired-looking remnant of a woman in a shabby naval uniform,
grabbed his shirt-sleeve. "What the hell are you two thinking of?"
"They asked for me," said
Aras.
"Yeah, and they're going to get me instead," said Ade. "I'm a
complication Shan doesn't need. And I want to look the bezeri in
the eye and apologize."
Lindsay wouldn't let go of Ade's shirt. "No! Just stop this!
You can't go down there. She'll come
after you, you know that. Go home."
Lindsay let go of Ade and went over to Rayat,
remarkably steady on her feet for a human walking on a glass floor.
"It's me and this bastard. My command, his idea. So we pay. Okay?"
Aras thought briefly of seizing both of them and taking
them down into the water, leaving Ade behind: he was still bigger and
faster than the marine, although he could put up a credible fight. But
he knew Ade would pursue him. And one of them would still have to
decide to return to Shan.
"I was just an accident," said Ade. "Let me put
something right."
Aras found it was painfully tempting. Life would be
impossibly hard without his isan. He had
lost her once, twice, and now he was losing her for the third and final
time. Human culture was replete with trinity. But if she had Ade
Bennett, she would be cared for and respected, and--he hoped--she would
find some peace with him.
Rayat was licking his lips nervously and blinking. "Lin, we're dead
either way. You don't care what happens to Shan
Frankland. You don't even like her."
"This isn't about her. It's about me."
She put her hand out to Ade. Aras was getting agitated; if you took a
terrible step, you needed to take it fast. Thinking was too painful.
"Ask them, Aras. Ask them if they'll accept me."
"No, the bezeri need me. And Shan needs to have a
decision taken for her."
"You selfish bastard," said Lindsay.
Aras couldn't see what was selfish about it. It was no
more selfish than stepping out into space rather than hand over c'naatat.
Lindsay spoke with the venom and pain
of the human bereaved, who buried their anger at the dead for leaving
them alone, and it always lurked hidden in their grief.
It seemed a desperate trick to avoid death. Aras stared
at Lindsay, unable to equate this gesture with the woman who had
brought bombs to Bezer'ej and thought it was reasonable. "You think
being c'naatat is enjoyable? Desirable? Is
this your bid to acquire it?"
"Nobody's ever coming for us. The Eqbas are going to
see to that."
"You're not capable of this."
"Try me. Okay, the bezeri want justice. They can only
kill me once. If I live down there, I can serve them, and whatever you
think of me, I really, really need to be forgiven in some small part."
Lindsay grabbed Aras's wrist. No gethes--and
no wess'har in recent memory--had touched his skin except Shan. He
jerked back. "Go on, infect me," she said. "No tricks. Let me go down
there and help them. Please, Aras. Then go back to Shan."
Rayat's scent was pure acid. Aras was about to seize
both of them and plunge over the side of the raft, but something hit
him hard in the head, once, twice, sending him to the deck and filling
his vision with exploding light. He pushed himself up on one hand but
the next agonizing blow was so hard he heard bone crack and saw a spray
of his own blood spatter the deck in front of him.
A weight crashed onto his back, pinning him. His right
arm was forced up his back. His shattered skull could recover in a
matter of minutes, but he didn't have that time.
"Sorry, mate," said Ade, panting with effort. "Come on,
you lazy bastards, give me a fucking hand. Rayat, get his legs."
Lindsay and Rayat were pinning him down now, sobbing
with the effort. Ade forced his left arm higher, and as much as Aras
struggled he couldn't get his strength back before Ade's plastic
restraints--insubstantial, harmless-looking but horribly effective--cut
deep into his wrists. He managed to kick out, but three bodies were
more than he could cope with. The restraints snapped tight around his
ankles.
Then the weight lifted off him. He was bound and
helpless.
"You'll be okay soon," said Ade. He knelt panting, head
tilted to look him in the eye as he lay on the deck. "But she'd kill me
if I went back without you."
Aras knew that. He'd been working on forgetting it. "You can't do
this."
"Watch me. Okay, let's have the signal lamp." Ade got
to his feet and Aras expected Rayat to seize the opportunity to escape,
even though the antihuman pathogen would kill him if the sea didn't
claim him first. He picked up the device. "Does this thing interpret
English?"
"It does," said Aras, recalling how Shan had used the
lamp to apologize to the bezeri at least twice. It was getting to be a
habit. "If the bezeri won't take her, then you must--"
"Here they come."
Aras looked down though the clear deck. There were
lights, red and cyan and yellow, and they were rising nearer the
surface. The last of the bezeri were coming. Ade knelt and projected
the colored light through the transparent deck. Patterns flared into
the water.
The human woman wants to help
you rebuild.
The bezeri paused in their ascent. Their reply came in
a curious flat approximation of human speech. Is
she the one responsible?
Yes, and the man.
How will they serve us if we
kill them? Or when they drown?
Ade paused. We can make sure they
don't drown. Like Aras. Like me.
"Won't we contaminate them?" said Rayat.
Aras had moved among the bezeri for 500 years and none
of them had acquired c'naatat. "Ade, I
forbid you to go with them."
The marine looked at him and put a finger to his lips.
He turned back to signaling. Will you take them
and me instead of Aras?
Rayat reeked of acid. But he wasn't fighting. He wasn't
trying to escape. Maybe c'naatat was
better than death for him, because he had no chance now of ever leaving
Bezer'ej.
How can we kill them if they
displease us?
Ade shrugged, although the lamp couldn't interpret a
motion. Call Aras. He'll finish the job.
"Ade, stay." Aras rolled a
little so he could face him. I know your past,
Ade Bennett: I know your World Before, and
I know what fears haunt you. "Shan will never forgive either of
us for this deceit. You abandoned your mother--and now you abandon Shan
after putting her through hell. So much for your courage."
It was a cruel human ploy, a spiteful lie. Ade embraced
danger every day to stop the voices, his own and his dead father's,
that told him he was a coward. Adding Shan to those voices was almost
too cruel. But Aras would have said anything then to stop Ade going
into the water. He expected him to hurl back the same accusation--Aras
was running, taking the coward's way out--but none came.
Ade's face fell for a telling moment.
"You bastard," he said.
Aras could hear that faint note in his voice, the one that said he was
struggling. "I'd never let that woman down again. Never."
A vivid display of red and amber lights swirled beneath
the raft, pulsing occasionally with green, getting brighter with each
beat. The bezeri were shouting, screaming.
Give them to us. Give them to us.
Ade knelt back on his heels. This
will take a few minutes. Then he laid the lamp aside and took
out his fighting knife.
Lindsay shut her eyes and held out her arm to Ade. He
sliced into her arm and then cut a flap from his own, exposing an area
large enough to keep the blood flowing sufficiently to drip onto
Lindsay's cut, just as Aras had done when he dripped his own blood into
Shan's open head-wound. It wasn't easy: c'naatat
stemmed blood flow fast.
"Hold your arm against mine, for goodness' sake," said
Lindsay.
"No, I don't want your memories," said Ade. "But you're
welcome to mine."
He sliced across his arm several times before he seemed
satisfied that enough blood had flowed.
Mohan Rayat smelled panicky but no longer terrified.
And his expression was relaxed, almost… content. Whatever Shan thought
of him, she would have conceded that he was as capable as she was of
facing the unthinkable with dignity.
Ade paused, staring into Lindsay's face for one minute,
then two, then three. He grabbed her arm and examined it, frowning.
"Not a scratch," he said. His tone was flat and
unemotional. He dunked his sleeve in the sea and wiped the blade clean
on it, then turned to Rayat. "Now let's give you someone to keep you
company on those dark nights, eh?"
"It's going to be one long night down there," said
Rayat. "You lose the light at a thousand feet." He pushed up his sleeve
to offer his arm. "Let's do it, then."
Aras could feel the warmth and slight itching as c'naatat
reconstructed his skull and scalp. The
pain was dimming. Ade busied himself cleaning Aras's blood from the
butt of his rifle.
"Two more minutes, I reckon," he said.
Aras rolled a little further to watch Lindsay's grim,
terrified face as she stared down into the water that was now filling
with pulsing red, amber and gold lights. The raft was illuminated from
beneath by angry bezeri, floating on liquid fire.
Rayat was gazing down through the deck into the glowing
water as well. The scent of anxiety was overwhelming.
But Aras could have sworn he actually smiled.
Sometimes people
need a few rehearsals to find out what they're really made of. Shan
didn't, of course: right from the start, she took Horatius's view that
there was no better way to die than facing fearful odds and holding
that damn bridge. But I had Lindsay labeled as a regular human being,
the sort who thinks the best way to die is in your sleep aged at least
four score years and ten. And then she surprised us all. Who would have
thought she'd choose an eternity under water to atone for the
destruction of the bezeri? You never really know anyone at all. And I
don't think Lindsay really knew what she would be capable of, either,
not even then.
Was I ever
tempted to try c'naatat?
You must be
joking.
Eddie Michallat's Constantine Diaries
Ade watched the skyline for the approach
of a small globule of bronze shiplet. Shapakti was late picking them up.
"You okay now?"
Aras was sitting on his heels, arms folded across his
chest. Ade thought it looked weird, but wess'har found that as
comfortable as sitting cross-legged.
"I'm no longer in pain," said Aras.
Ade knelt down beside him and braced himself to put
both hands on Aras's head to examine it. Aras didn't flinch. Wess'har
had few taboos about being touched. Ade parted the hair--barbed and
vaned like strings of soft feather--and found nothing to indicate that
he'd smashed the butt of his rifle hard enough into Aras's head to
fracture his skull and rip it open.
"I'm sorry, mate," he said. "Only way I could bring you
down for a while."
"I understand."
No, he didn't: Ade ached with misery. He had become his
father, resorting to violence in a moment. And, as Aras had pointed
out, he'd run and left Shan to it, just like he had left his mother.
He'd been so sure he was doing the decent thing. Now he saw what Aras
had seen: another act of cowardice.
"C'naatat or not, that must
have hurt."
"It did." Aras reached out and went to clasp Ade's arm,
but he jerked it back. He was still edgy. "I regret what I said to you."
"Maybe it needed saying."
"I only said it to stop you. It's untrue."
It wasn't. Aras was becoming so human that he'd even
learned diplomacy. But it was nice of him to try to lie out of
kindness. Wess'har weren't good liars at all. And
neither am I.
How could he ever sleep with Shan now? She'd pick up
his memories. She'd experience those awful minutes. She'd know.
It might not happen right away, but she'd
find out before long. She'd realize that he handed over c'naatat
to the two people she most despised,
and that he and Aras almost competed to be the first to run out on her.
"What about you?"
Aras looked round. "What?"
"Oursan. You'll sleep with
her and you'll transfer whatever it is that the cells transfer and
she'll have your memories. She'll find out what went on."
Aras waited several seconds before replying, as if it
had occurred to him for the first time too. But he must have thought
it. "Perhaps not. Genetic memory isn't telepathy. And we will deal with
that when it happens."
"Can you lie to her? Would
you?"
Aras waited several seconds again. "I don't know."
Ade settled down again and waited, looking down through
the niluy-ghur's transparent deck at
swaying weed in the shallows beneath. Shapakti's fragment of vessel
could pick up the raft from the surface and set it down again without
even getting the deck wet. The Eqbas would be one hell of an assault
force. Ade appreciated that kind of detail.
He wondered what Lindsay and Rayat were doing right
then, and all he could imagine was that it was taking place somewhere
cold, and dark, and terrifying, and lonely.
Dawn was coming to the roomful of jungle
underneath the city of F'nar. Shan sat cross-legged on the floor and
watched the artificial sunrise produced by the daylight cycle that
Shapakti's team had created. The macaws stretched their wings one at a
time, legs extended beneath them as elegantly as a dancer's, and
fluffed their plumage.
C'naatat had many good
points. The best she could think of right now was that it had erased
all physical signs that she had spent an hour sobbing her heart out in
the privacy of the jungle room.
"Do you want to go home that badly?" said Shapakti's
voice. It made her jump. She hadn't smelled him coming.
"Forget it," she said.
"I understand. I long for home too."
She rubbed the back of her hand across her nose, still
sniffing. "Not a word to Aras or Ade, okay?"
"Why?"
"I don't want them to know."
"The treatment will always be here for you."
"If it works. But not for
Aras, though. And I won't abandon him, and I know Ade won't either."
"Then you have no reason to weep."
It didn't feel that way. But Shapakti was right. Shan
patted his back, reassured for the time being by splendid wess'har
pragmatism. The Earth she thought of as home didn't exist now: it
probably never had, but it would exist one day and the Eqbas would see
to that. She had almost completed the mission that Eugenie Perault had
never intended her to fulfill. No, she had no reason to weep.
"Are those two buggers back?"
"Of course they are," said Shapakti. "They wouldn't let
me accompany them on the niluy-ghur, but I
brought them back as you ordered."
"Just checking," she said. Ordered.
Yes, she had been in sistent. "They can
both be bloody daft sometimes."
"You have a good family. Cherish them."
Poor bloody Shapakti, years from home, and missing his
brothers and his wife and their kids. Shan could offer him no comfort
and fumbled in her pocket. She drew out the container that she had
carried with her wherever she went, across years and star systems.
"I want to show you something," she said. She opened
the cap and tipped the contents into her palm. Small, pale, round
seeds--tomato seeds--settled on the background of bioluminescence that
flickered within her skin. "Tomatoes. I always planned to grow them
when I stopped being a copper. These are illegal, you know.
Unregistered hybrids."
"Life-forms cannot be illegal."
"I like the way you people think. I really do."
She tipped the seeds back into the container and
decided that she was going to spend today sowing tomatoes, just as
she'd always planned. Shapakti beckoned her to the doorway, slipping
behind her and herding her out into the passage. He had to start moving
the habitat. Shan was glad it wouldn't remain here to remind her of
Earth.
She walked out into the daylight, the real daylight of
Ceret, the yellow sun they once called Cavanagh's Star before any human
knew how many different names it really had. She wandered back up the
pearl-encrusted terraces, rattling the seeds in the little box and
greeting wess'har who she now knew as friends and neighbors. She paused
at the top of the steps on the highest level of the terraces and turned
to admire F'nar in the winter sun.
It was as every bit as beautiful as rain forest if you
knew how to look.
Then she walked on, wondering about the feasibility of
that lavender preserve. As she pushed against the door, the lights in
her hands reflected in the pearl surface and she took a deep breath,
determined not to look back at her own World Before. It was the first
breath she had drawn in an hour.
"Hey, you two," she called. "I'm home."
CITY OF PEARL
and
CROSSING THE LINE
"Stellar."
Jack McDevitt, author of Deepsix
"Satisfyingly complex… [Traviss] at times,
evokes the earlier moral fables of Le Guin… at other times the
revisionist critique of expanding human empires… and at times the union
of romance with SF that we see in the work of Catherine Asaro or Lois
McMaster Bujold… Traviss manages to keep these sometimes conflicting
modes in balance, mostly through her strong sense of character."
Locus
"A fascinating cast of characters involved in
a richly complex situation… Her people are convincingly real… Traviss
has created a vivid assortment of alien races, each with distinctive
characteristics and agendas."
James Alan Gardner, author of Expendable
"Science fiction with teeth… In Shan
Frankland, Karen Traviss has created a tough, interesting, believable
character."
Gregory Frost, author of Fitcher's
Brides
"A writer to watch… Traviss takes what could
have been a rote collection of characters (marines, cops, religious
extremists) and slowly adds depth, complexity, and color."
BookPage
My grateful thanks go to Charlie Allery,
Bryan Boult, Debbie Button, and Dr.Ian Tregillis, for critical reading;
to my editor, Diana Gill, and agent, Russ Galen, for keeping me in
line; to Andy Tucker, for theological insight; to Benjamin Buchholz,
for finding the perfect word; to Malcolm McGreevy and Cliff Allen, who
set me on the path that led here; and to Chris "TK" Evans, who made
that path a whole lot smoother.
KAREN TRAVISS is a
former defense
correspondent and TV and newspaper journalist. She's now a political
public relations manager and has also been a press officer for the
police, an advertising copywriter, and a journalism lecturer. She has
served in both the Royal Navy Auxiliary Service and the Territorial
Army. A graduate of the Clarion science fiction and fantasy workshop,
her work has appeared in Asimov's, Realms of
Fantasy, and On Spec. She lives in Wiltshire, England.
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