"Richard Wadholm - Orange Groves Out to the Horizon" - читать интересную книгу автора (Wadholm Richard)

тАЬI donтАЩt remember it in quite that way.тАЭ Which was a lie. I remembered
the in-jokes, and the snickering sarcasm. And the music. The college girls
who listened to Simon and Garfunkel, all trembly-lipped and shiny-eyed.
The sons of garage mechanics, who listened to Black Sabbath and waited on
the end of the world. We were, all of us, waiting on something.
тАЬLook at your dad. He never gave up on the future. What was that he
put into his note? Orange trees all overтАжSomething something.тАЭ
тАЬOrange groves, out to the horizon.тАЭ
тАЬThatтАЩs it. He was writing about how your mother and him were the
pioneers of a new frontier. When I look at the world, he said, all I see are
orange groves, out to the horizon.тАЭ


Polyphony 6
288
 ORANGE GROVES OUT TO THE HORIZON


Maybe the air conditioning was up too high, suddenly I had pimples up
and down my arms.
тАЬHow did you know what was in his suicide note?тАЭ
тАЬI know. He got it from me.тАЭ
тАЬYou coached my father through his suicide note?тАЭ
I started to say something bad, caught the reflection of myself in a
darkened computer monitor, the sweat-curled hairs on my forehead. I
looked too ridiculous to make threats against a convict in prison.
тАЬJesus. You make it sound like I put his neck in the noose. We talked. Is
all. I called him up to get your new work number. He was getting on in
years. I think he was afraid he had cancer.тАЭ
тАЬMy father told you he had cancer?тАЭ
тАЬHis, uhh, personals were giving him problems, you know what IтАЩm
saying?тАЭ Ken was playing games with his cigarette smoke now. I could hear
the laminar hush as he lofted smoke rings at the ceiling. тАЬYou want to keep
an eye down there too, Hoss. We arenтАЩt getting any younger ourselves.тАЭ
Like I needed to hear this just now.
тАЬWhatтАЩs wrong, Hoss?тАЭ
тАЬWhat?тАЭ
тАЬThought IтАЩd slowed you up there. You all right? You still with me?тАЭ
I didnтАЩt want to tell him about my check up, or the test results I was
waiting on. Ken isnтАЩt the sort you go to with personal information.
тАЬThey do autopsies on suicides,тАЭ I told him. тАЬMy father did not have
cancer.тАЭ
тАЬWell. Hmm. JokeтАЩs on him I guess, huh? Listen, IтАЩm running out of
change here. You gonna help me with Thumper or what?тАЭ
All I could think about was that day in the shelter, I remember my dad
with this sly smile that seems to go with terrible confessions. Him, talking
almost to himself: тАЬYou wait on a moment for half your life,тАЭ he whispered,
so quiet that nobody in the room heard him but his son. тАЬYou never think
what happens when the momentтАЩs almost passed. My boy is going away
and IтАЩll never see him again.тАЭ