"Siege of Darkness" - читать интересную книгу автора (Salvatore Robert)

Part 2 THE ONSET OF CHAOS

Forever after, the bards of the Realms called it the Time ofTroubles, the time when the gods were kicked out of the heavens, their avatars walking among the mortals. The time when the Tablets of Fate were stolen, invoking the wrath of Ao, Overlord of the Gods, when magic went awry, and when, as a consequence, social and religious hierarchies, so often based on magical strength, fell into chaos.

I have heard many tales from fanatical priests of their encounters withtheir particular avatars, frenzied stories from men and women who claim to have looked upon their deities. So many others came to convert to a religionduring this troubled time, likewise claiming they had seen the light and thetruth, however convoluted it might be.

I do not disagree with the claims, and would not openly attack thepremise of their encounters. I am glad for those who have found enrichmentamidst the chaos; I am glad whenever another person finds the contentmentof spiritual guidance.

But what of faith?

What of fidelity and loyalty? Complete trust? Faith is not granted bytangible proof. It comes from the heart and the soul. If a person needs proofof a god's existence, then the very notion of spirituality is diminished intosensuality and we have reduced what is holy into what is logical.

I have touched the unicorn, so rare and so precious, the symbol of the goddess Mielikki, who holds my heart and soul. This was before the onset of theTime of Troubles, yet were I of a like mind to those who make the claims of viewing avatars, I could say the same. I could say that I have touched Mielikki, thatshe came to me in a magical glade in the mountains near Dead Orc Pass.

The unicorn was not Mielikki, and yet it was, as is the sunrise and the seasons, as are the birds and the squirrels and the strength of a tree that has lived through the dawn and death of centuries. As are the leaves, blowing on autumn winds and the snow piling deep in cold mountain vales. As are

the smell of a crisp night, the twinkle of the starry canopy, and the howl of a distant wolf.

No, I'll not argue openly against one who has claimed to have seen anavatar, because that person will not understand that the mere presence of such a being undermines the very purpose of, and value of, faith. Because if the true gods were so tangible and so accessible, then we would no longer be independent creatures set on a journey to find the truth, but merely a herd of sheep needing the guidance of a shepherd and his dogs, unthinking and without the essence of faith.

The guidance is there, I know. Not in such a tangible form, but in whatwe know to be good and just. It is our own reactions to the acts of others that show us the value of our own actions, and if we have fallen so far as to need an avatar, an undeniable manifestation of a god, to show us our way, then we are pitiful creatures indeed.

The Time of Troubles? Yes. And even more so if we are to believe the suggestion of avatars, because truth is singular and cannot, by definition, support so many varied, even opposing manifestations.

The unicorn was not Mielikki, and yet it was, for I have touchedMielikki. Not as an avatar, or as a unicorn, but as a way of viewing myplace in the world. Mielikki is my heart. I follow her precepts because, were I to write precepts based on my own conscience, they would be the same. Ifollow Mielikki because she represents what I call truth.

Such is the case for most of the followers of most of the various gods,and if we looked more closely at the pantheon of the Realms, we would realize that the precepts of the «goodly» gods are not so different; it is theworldly interpretations of those precepts that vary from faith to faith.

As for the other gods, the gods of strife and chaos, such as Lloth, the Spider Queen, who possesses the hearts of those priestesses who rule Menzoberranzan…

They are not worth mentioning. There is no truth, only worldly gain, and any religion based on such principles is, in fact, no more than a practice of self-indulgence and in no way a measure of spirituality. In worldly terms, the priestesses of the Spider Queen are quite formidable; in spiritual terms, they are empty. Thus, their lives are without love and without joy.

So tell me not of avatars. Show me not your proof that yours is the truegod. I grant you your beliefs without question and without judgment, but ifyou grant me what is in my heart, then such tangible evidence is irrelevant.