"Ron Goulart - Why I Never Went Steady With Heather Moon" - читать интересную книгу автора (Goulart Ron)

RON GOULART

WHY I NEVER WENT STEADY WITH HEATHER MOON

It was about the time that the third large fire-spitting demon came spilling out
of the bathtub that I decided to capitulate. Dodging the scaly green creature's
sticky coiling tentacles, and making a rush past the second demon, who was
crouched on the toilet seat and bellowing out noise and sooty yellow smoke, I
dashed into the small living room of my apartment.

My neighbor on the left was pounding on the wall with the ferrule of his cane.
"Do you know what time it is, young man?"

"Midnight?" I guessed.

These particular supernatural manifestations usually showed up some time around
the witching hour.

The initial demon, who was covered with blood-splattered feathers and seemed to
have several toothy mouths, was now crouched on the sofa and eating one of the
faded cushions.

"C'mon, don't do that. I'm having a hell of a time explaining all this stuff to
the landlord as it is."

The demon wolfed down the entire cushion, then made a nasty roaring sound.

My neighbor on the other side smacked the wall with a rolled up magazine. "Turn
down that TV show, Harkins."

"In a minute. Sorry."

I made a shushing gesture at the demon and pointed at the phone. "You guys win.
I'm calling him now."

The feathery demon snatched a coaster off my lopsided coffee table and ate that.

Taking up the phone, very gingerly since it was resting on the far end of the
same coffee table, I dialed the number of Professor Matthew Krouch.

The telephone rang five times before he, feigning a drowsy voice, answered,
"Krouch here."

"Skip the acting, professor," I said, keeping an eye on the nearest demon. The
other two had, as far as I could determine, remained in the john. "This is Will
Harkins."

"Who? Calling me at such an ungodly hour is --"
"I give up. I quit. I concede," I informed him, sadness, weariness and quite a
bit of anger sounding in my voice. "She's all yours."